tv Jimmy Kimmel Live ABC March 9, 2023 11:35pm-12:37am PST
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have a great night. >> lou: from hollywood, it's "jimmy kimmel live!" tonight -- jon favreau. nicole byer. and music from tove lo. with cleto and the cletones. and now, jimmy kimmel! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> jimmy: very nice. thank you. i appreciate it. oh, very nice. hi, everybody. i'm jimmy, i am the host of the show. thank you for watching the show, thank you for joining us at the show. we are in hollywood where we're still wet. the rain finally let up today, but it's coming back. and it's cold. it snowed again today.
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there were snow flurries in santa monica. which is so crazy for us. and it rained a lot last night. last night, i dragged the garbage cans out to the street. it was -- i felt like one of the soldiers in "all quiet on the western front." [ laughter ] really a heroic act. it was harrowing. i said to my wife, "you know, women's history month starts tomorrow. i think it would be a cool thing, maybe a great message for our daughter and for equality, if you dragged the garbage cans out." [ laughter and applause ] then she showed me one of her fingers. [ laughter ] women's history month started as women's history week in 1982, and then someone thought, "hey, women should probably get more time than sharks on the discovery channel." [ laughter ] so they made it a month. it's an opportunity to look back at the history of women's rights, especially this year, when so many of women's rights are history. [ light laughter ] and while we are all aware that
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february is the shortest month, it was very hard this morning. in fact, damn near impossible for our newscasters around the country to believe it's march. >> good morning, it's the beginning of march. >> wow, can you believe it? >> no. >> march, can you believe it? >> no. >> it's march. >> i know, can you believe it? >> march, can you believe it? >> march, can you believe that? >> march, can you believe it? >> march, can you believe it? >> march, can you believe it?p>e that? >> god bless. >> can you believe it, we're already in march. >> already in march. >> march already, can you believe it's here? >> it is hard to believe. >> hard to believe it's march. >> hard to believe this is march. >> hard to believe it's march 1st. >> march 1st, can you believe it? >> march 1st, can you believe it? >> no. >> march 1st, can you believe it? >> no. >> march 1st already, can you believe it? >> march 1st, can you believe? >> march 1st, wow, can we just let that sink in for a second? >> so says jimmy kimmel. >> can you believe it? >> jimmy: well.
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we're starting to make an impact. there are inroads being made. it's hard to believe they're still doing this. in washington, d.c., the annual gathering of the maggalos has begun. [ laughter ] today they started cpac. cpac stands for clowns periodically assembling in convention centers. [ laughter ] it is a chance for the far right to get together and share crazy thoughts. they started it with the traditional 21 assault rifle salute and the pledge of allegiance to donald trump. [ laughter ] then they got going with -- they've got some great panels lined up this year. these are real. we didn't make these up. these are not jokes. people pay to go see these. "no chinese balloons above tennessee." [ laughter ] "sacking the woke playbook." [ laughter ] "parents with pitchforks." [ laughter ] i saw parents with pitchforks at coachella last year, really good band. [ laughter ] "the biden crime family." [ laughter ] and this is the one i would go to. "my speech." by mike lindell, the mypillow man. [ laughter ] i guess his rabies test came back negative. [ laughter ] he's able to speak at this event. and he's not the only star.
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you've also got the honorable matt gaetz, congressman from florida. former congresswoman, lieutenant colonel, host of "the tulsi gabbard show." mr. donald trump jr., executive vice president of the trump organization and host of the "triggered with don jr." podcast. and kari lake. i guess that's her resume, i don't know. [ laughter ] [ applause ] i guess "former local newscaster who lost" didn't look good on the flyer. when you buy a ticket, a general ticket costs $295. when you buy it, this is real. you have to promise you won't hold them liable if you get covid. [ laughter ] this is the same group of republicans who say covid is a joke, making you sign a waiver so they're not responsible if you die from that joke, perfect. [ laughter ] mike pence will not be in attendance at cpac. the last time a big group of these maga monkeys got together, they tried to hang him. so he opted out. [ laughter ] the conference is being held at the gaylord harbor national resort and convention center, which is another reason mike pence won't come.
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[ laughter ] donald trump is the headliner. which means ron desantis won't come either. this bad mojo between trump and desantis, this is going to be a lot of fun. even though he hasn't officially entered the race, trump has been trying out nicknames for desantis. which is a subject he weighed in on with his pal/just for men customer sebastian gorka. >> you made quite a bit of news on truth social and on your recent rallies with your new nickname for the governor of florida, ron desanctimonious. somebody else has come up with another nickname. what is the nickname you have for us? >> ron deestablishment. >> mr. president, ron deestablishment, what do you think of that? >> that's not bad, i've heard worse. they came up with lots of different names. meatball, i didn't like that one too much. >> jimmy: he came up with that one, he doesn't like it too much. [ laughter ] doesn't donald trump have facetime? why is every interview with him giving a mad face while we
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listen on the phone? [ laughter ] we got some new intel on what went down at the fbi in the weeks leading up to the search and seizure at mar-a-lago. some fbi agents were reluctant to search the president's residence because they didn't like the optics and they were scared they might walk in on trump pleasuring himself to "the sean hannity show." [ laughter ] oops! mr. president, we're not with the military. [ laughter ] and while we continue to wait for one of these many investigations to result in something, weren't they about to hand out indictments in georgia two weeks ago? if they do finally lock trump up, there's a whole minor league team of nitwits ready to step in and take over. including marge-a-lago, marjorie taylor greene, who is still whining about being heckled at a restaurant this week. the same woman who followed and shouted at a high school student who had just survived a mass shooting is very upset. she told sean hannity that someone ruined her perfectly good blooming onion. >> last night i was having
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dinner with two members of my staff. we were working, preparing for committee hearings today -- [ laughter ] and then we were approached, a woman came over to my al aacng me, calling me all kinds of names. >> you dumb, stupid, ridiculous hot dog face! >> then another member of her party started screaming f-u, marjorie. >> f-u, marjorie! >> as loud as he possibly could, over and over again, inside the restaurant. >> f-u, marjorie! f-u! >> we want our own safe space, and we deserve it. [ laughter and applause ] >> jimmy: if you can't feel safe at a waffle house, i don't know where you can. to you they're for safe spaces, okay. i felt they were against that, right? i know a safe space. might i suggest the bottom of the well that girl from "the ring" climbs out of? [ laughter ]
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laura ingraham, who interviewed a parent in some town in maine, upset about the books his sons found at the school library. one of the sons is in high school, one's in elementary. the book the kid got at the high school was definitely inappropriate for teenagers, but for whatever reason, he brought his 9-year-old on tv with him to talk about it. and watch this kid closely, because he's good. >> that book was gender queer. my son actually checked that out of the high school library and brought it home. i looked through it. there was graphic content of two boys and one of them was -- sucking him off -- >> okay, all right. we get it. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: come on, now. maybe a spoiler alert? [ laughter ] let's have another look at that kid. >> sucking him off -- >> okay, all right, got it. [ laughter ] [ applause ]
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>> jimmy: well, at least he's learning something. on sunday, march 12th, i am hosting the oscars, live, here on abc. [ cheers and applause ] that's very kind. there are some major motion pictures in the running this year. ten best picture nominees. how many of them have you seen, guillermo? >> guillermo: one, jimmy. >> jimmy: only one? >> guillermo: yeah, only one. >> jimmy: you've not seen -- really? i'm guessing it's "top gun," right? >> guillermo: no, it's "avatar." >> jimmy: you didn't see "top gun"? when tom cruise was here you told him you saw "top gun," didn't you? >> guillermo: i didn't tell him anything. i took a picture with him, that's it. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: do you think he assumed you saw "top gun"? >> guillermo: yeah, of course. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: why didn't you go see "top gun"? >> guillermo: i don't know, jimmy. >> jimmy: of the ten best picture nominees, do you know which made the most money?
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>> guillermo: avatar," jimmy. >> jimmy: that's right, "avatar: the way of water" grossed $2.3 billion. it's the third highest grossing movie of all-time. box office matters for sure but you don't have a hit movie until yehya says you do. [ laughter ] our very own in-house rotten tomato, yehya, has yet to weigh in until now. yehya talking about the movie "avatar: the way of water." >> hi, it's me, yehya. i talk about the movie nominate for oscar, "avatar." i saw the old "avatar" that the new one play now. "avatar," people live in their mind, far, no clothes, only underwear. the relationship in the movie "avatar," rosie cement, she's in the marvel movie, she's green woman. that movie, she's green alien. yeah.
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serena whatever, yeah. and also she did the movie "friend with the monkey." [ laughter ] and the man guy in that movie "avatar," sam willis smith. i got picture with james cameron, he's the director who do "terminator," he do "titanic," he do movie with arnold, he dress like 007, hold the gun like james bond. big director. michael coresese. "the godfather." i got picture with him. steven spielberg, too. that movie, "avatar," is they have a special suit like this. james cameron put you in computer and become avatar. wow, look, it's beautiful. look, i'm swim now! i shooting arrow! >> you're one of us now. >> now i'm avatar! go see "avatar" in 3d with the glasses. it's boom!
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come in your face! [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: thank you, yehya. >> jimmy, jimmy, he's the best! i love you, i love you. >> jimmy: i love you too, yehya. i love you, i love you too. all right. yes, there we go. god bless you too. >> god bless you forever. >> jimmy: god bless you. >> god bless you. >> jimmy: god bless you. >> no, god bless you. >> jimmy: god bless you. >> no, god bless you. >> jimmy: today, god can bless you, tomorrow god can bless me. >> god bless you and the audience. >> jimmy: and the audience. god bless you too. [ cheers and applause ] >> i take picture before oscar. >> jimmy: you did? >> with you. >> jimmy: yeah? >> can i take picture? >> jimmy: god bless you, yes, of course. >> god bless you. oh, you want to take a picture now? >> yeah, you and me. >> jimmy: okay, all right. this can't wait until after the show? >> yeah. >> jimmy: okay, all right. >> i love you too, jimmy. got bless you. >> jimmy: god bless you. >> god bless you.
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>> jimmy: god bless you. >> it's me now. >> jimmy: okay. god bless you. there we go. take him away, guillermo. [ applause ] we have a blessed show for you tonight. nicole byer is here. we've got music from tove lo. [ cheers and applause ] and we'll be right back with jon favreau! [ upbeat music ] ♪ do your thing ♪ ♪ i said, do your thing ♪ ♪ come on now, let's roll now ♪ ♪ let it all out ♪ ♪ do your thing ♪ ♪ do your thing ♪ ♪ just do your thing ♪ spring moments made easy. that's totally target.
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then later, from sweden, her album "dirt femme" is out, with "borderline," tove lo. [ cheers and applause ] tomorrow night -- sorry, i thought i had the album here. i'm distracted because we've got this kid in our audience who comes from the netherlands from a town called gouda. the cheese is named for the town. i've become fascinated because he hates all our food in america. [ laughter ] i looked up gouda on my ipad. is this your leader? [ laughter ] do you know him? >> i have no idea. >> jimmy: you don't know him? >> he looks like the guy that hypes up the crowd here, so maybe he knows him. [ laughter and applause ] >> jimmy: oh, yeah. he does look a little bit like -- yeah. [ cheers and applause ] i'm guessing he smells like him too. [ laughter ] [ rim shot ] tomorrow night, kevin bacon and oscars best actor nominee paul
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mescal with music from kali uchis. our next legend begat the marvel universe. he directed the original "iron man" and serves as writer, executive producer, sometime director, and biological father of a baby yoda on "the mandalorian." season three premiered today on disney plus. please welcome jon favreau! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> jimmy: always great to see you, how are you doing? >> i'm doing great, how are you doing? >> jimmy: i'm doing well. your big red carpet premiere of "the mandalorian" last night. >> yes, the el capitan, a lot of memories there. all the marvel stuff, all the disney stuff. >> jimmy: are you superstitious at all? is that where you want to do it?
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or is it because disney owns the theater? >> disney owns the theater. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: i heard the red carpet covered your star, your brand-new star on the hollywood walk of fame. >> my brand-new star, thank you. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: that's disrespectful. but congratulations. >> right near yours, i noticed. >> jimmy: we're in the same neighborhood. >> right in front of here. they cut a hole in the carpet, when is very nice, very thoughtful, for the premiere. there was just that. >> jimmy: i like that. >> a little light on it. >> jimmy: that's good thinking. yeah. it's your star, then i think snoop dogg and then marla gibbs and then me. the four of us are together. >> snoop dogg's there with us? >> jimmy: snoop dogg is right there. >> that's awesome. >> jimmy: snoop dogg is getting your star high right now. nobody here would know. >> jimmy: morey amsterdam. we can't mention amsterdam, it's a little bit of a sore point. [ laughter ] got a real wise guy in the audience. he's from gouda in the netherlands. gouda. >> like the cheese. >> jimmy: he says our gouda is
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terrible here. >> yes, but you can make little sculptures out of the red wax wrapping. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: there you go. he doesn't know anything, he really doesn't. [ laughter ] >> you work your way up to >> jimmy: it's craze to me when i think back not on the first time you were here, but the first time you were here talking about the "iron man" movie, which i think is about two years before it came out. >> was it? >> jimmy: it was. i was so interested in why of all the characters in the marvel universe -- now it seems to make perfect sense -- why you'd start with iron man. >> it's, who was left over? they were making a lot of the superhero movies with spider-man, they had batman, and iron man was -- seemed like the next logical choice. >> jimmy: to you, not to me, it didn't seem that logical. yet it turned out to be very logical. did you know that, like, it would be the -- like kind of the seed from which this giant tree grew? >> we didn't know. honestly, when we -- when robert downey was cast, that's when i
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thought, oh, this could be something really cool and really special. and we attracted -- because of robert, i think -- a lot of great other acts like jeff bridges and gwyneth. it turned into a really -- have a really fun tone. and the characters became interesting and the comedy was kind of offbeat. of course, the technology and our friends at industrial light and magic could for the first time bring this metal suit to life in a way that you could believe. i think the technology was ready to present a character like that. >> jimmy: robert downey jr. spoke at your star ceremony. you had to ask one or two people to come speak, somebody who's important to you in your life. not only did he speak, he -- i don't know if you knew this was going to happen. i think we have a photograph. maybe i have the photograph here. here it is. here's robert after he spoke about you, he put a big wad of gum on your star. [ laughter ] >> he said he wanted to be the first. yeah, yeah. you know, he did not tell me this. roy choi, our mutual friend. >> jimmy: roy choi, yeah. >> it was a wonderful day, i
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thought it really broke the tension. but of course, the -- you know, the dignitaries from the hollywood chamber of commerce quickly scooped it up. i wanted to keep it. we could auction that thing off, i think. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: i love the idea, of all the things there are to scoop up on hollywood boulevard. [ laughter ] that robert downey jr.'s gum was at the top of the list there. >> if it was across the street, maybe i could have had the real iron man standing on it. >> jimmy: perhaps you could have. >> if you're from the netherlands, across the street they have people dressed up as superheroes. >> jimmy: yes, yes. >> it makes up for our lack of good cheese. >> jimmy: you can see them, if you show up early enough, a good tip for tourists, show up early enough in the morning you can see them with their heads off, smoking. [ laughter ] >> really? >> jimmy: yeah. >> what hole does spongebob smoke through? >> jimmy: geez, i think all of them. [ laughter ] there's one spider-man's got a big, white moustache. he'll park his accord around the corner from here.
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and every once in a while i see him smoking with my son and it's upsetting. [ laughter ] as i drive him to school. >> it's hard work, it's hard work being in that costume all day. >> jimmy: speaking of my son, i do want to mention something. what's the name of your show on apple tv plus? >> "a prehistoric planet." >> jimmy: it's a great show, "a prehistoric planet." [ cheers and applause ] >> there's actually a second season coming up, may 22nd. >> jimmy: oh, great. >> check it out, yeah. [ cheers and applause ] >> second season. >> jimmy: i can tell right now, because i know these people, they're lying. they don't know what the show is. [ laughter ] >> thank you for turning the "applause" light on, i appreciate that, thank you. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: the show, you kind of -- correct me if i have any of this wrong. you've taken that technology, you did the live action "lion king"? >> that's exactly right. >> jimmy: you applied to it dinosaurs? >> right. we filmed out like we were doing a nature documentary. david attenborough is our narrator. it's done by the bbc and apple.
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we go in the field, use state-of-the-art science and show how dinosaurs lived based on the latest archeological evidence. it's not just biting and fighting. they're rearing their young. there's a lot of scientific breakthroughs that have been happening? the last few years and we depict that. we shoot the plates in nature then add cg dinosaurs that are photo real like we developed around "lion king." it plays like a live-action documentary, except it's set 60 million years ago. >> jimmy: it looks like planet earth, then david attenborough narrating it. >> right. >> jimmy: i've told my 5-year-old there aren't my dinosaurs and we don't have to worry about them coming. [ laughter ] he believed it for awhile, until now he sees this, he thinks there are dinosaurs. >> there's a t-rex walking down hollywood boulevard. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: you're contributing to the fake news in our society right now. but it's fun to watch. i like the biting and fighting, don't lay off on the biting and fighting. >> we have a little of that too. >> jimmy: let's take a break,
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we'll bite each other, fight at the commercial, and we'll come back and see a scene from "the mandalorian" with jon favreau after this, we'll be right back. >> lou: portions of "jimmy kimmel live" are brought to you by orville redenbacher's microwave popcorn. movie night isn't complete without orville redenbacher.
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>> it's complicated. i completed my quest. he returned to me. i removed my helmet, and now i'm an apostate. >> which is all the more reason for you to stay here with us. where you're from, you may be an apostate. but here, you'd be landed gentry. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: jon favreau, a scene from "the mandalorian" which premiered today on disney plus. people were up at midnight waiting for it to come on. that's pretty great, isn't it? >> it's wonderful. like you said, we had a premiere right next door. it was great to see it with a crowd. it's also great to see the internet react and guess what's going to happen next. >> jimmy: yeah, yeah. >> it's been a really fun gig. >> jimmy: i watched it at my house last night before midnight, not far before midnight. my nephew, my brother's son, wesley, is in the show. and he played -- he's been on the show for a little while. >> he was -- well, he was -- robert rodriguez cast him doing "book of boba fett."
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there was a little kid that was a tusken raider. covered with bandages, no dialogue. we cast him because robert wanted somebody who was good professional with a martial arts background. he likes to cast kids with that background because he finds that they're good physically, easier to direct. you called me and said, "you're working with my nephew." i didn't know. i didn't know if he was in the wa "oh, wait, wesley kimmel." >> jimmy: that's right. >> he did such a great job for us there, we figured he should be allowed to show his face this year. he gave him a different role. >> jimmy: not only a different role, he's in the first seven minutes of the show. >> no, he's great. >> jimmy: all focused on him. [ cheers and applause ] i have a picture of him. >> there he is. look at that. that face. >> jimmy: did he tell you he has a background in the martial arts? >> does he not? >> jimmy: i don't think so. [ laughter ]
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i don't know, maybe he went to three karate classes when he was a kid. [ laughter ] >> well, whatever it takes. >> jimmy: let's just say, if there's trouble, don't expect him to help. [ laughter ] this is pretty great. you got your own action figure here. >> there i am. >> jimmy: there you are. [ cheers and applause ] did you approve it? or did they -- >> i don't know whose head that is. >> jimmy: yeah, i know, it doesn't look like you. >> but you know what, our friends at hasbro, that was something i do nice sometimes for people that work on the shows as a collectible hasbro figure. i told them i was going to be on this show. and we have the one and only -- would you like to see the jimmy kimmel action figure? [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: oh! oh, wow. oh, look at this. wow. look at that. [ laughter ] i'm in carbonite! look at that. >> i like how they put you in your same suit. >> jimmy: i like how i'm being frozen in carbonite and i'm
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smiling. [ laughter ] >> what a pro. after 20 years, you know what i mean? nothing sticks to you. you could have me capturing you -- >> jimmy: oh, yeah, we could play together, yeah. [ laughter ] >> that's what it feels like when we make the show. >> jimmy: my background in martial arts finally pays off. [ laughter ] [ applause ] so there are a lot of -- you're kind of in charge of the "star wars" world, in some ways? right? >> one little corner of it on disney plus. >> jimmy: don't you consult and everything goes through you? >> we all talk to each other, but there's all different time periods, different filmmakers doing different storylines. they all have to feel consistently "star wars." my partner dave, he works at lucasfilm as well as working with the show. he's very involved with the other shows but we make sure everything fits together. now we're working on three different shows together. four if you count "book of boba fett." "mandalorian," "ahsoka" is coming out in post production.
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"skeleton crew" that we did with john watts from "spider-man." we have quite a few shows that are happening in this same time period. >> jimmy: is there any chance spider-man will ever be in "star wars"? you've got apollo creed in it, why not put spider-man in there? [ applause ] >> tom holland -- i'll work on it. i'm sure you've had him on. tom holland, great guy. >> jimmy: sure, yeah, okay. wow, that would be -- boy. >> your nephew beat him out for the role. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: one of the things in the first "iron man" the post-credits sequence. now it affects all of us. you can't go to the bathroom after the movie. >> that's right. >> jimmy: you have to wait. and then on the rare occasion that there's no post-credit sequence, you're mad. >> that's right, that's right. [ laughter ] we did it -- right, we have it with sam jackson as nick fury. >> jimmy: right. >> that was a top secret shoot. we had to do that on a day off. sam jackson came in.
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i'm a fan of sam jackson, not just from "star wars." this is before marvel. from his tarantino films, his independent film days. it was just a blast to have him there. the eye patch. the leather jacket. just having him on the set. and he's like a real geek, he loves comic book culture and sci-fi. so he was there, and i was directing him. >> jimmy: you shot two scenes with sam? >> right. so -- yeah. the way it works is iron man at the end walks into his living room. after the credits. >> jimmy: tony stark's living room? >> tony stark's living room. he gets surprised by nick fury being there, inviting him to join the avengers initiative. that kind of kicks off the whole sequencing that happens. and i had him do a take for me. i knew it wasn't going to be in the movie. where he goes, "who are you?" >> jimmy: wait, we have that, actually. >> you have it? where did you find this? this was never -- did you -- how -- >> jimmy: i don't know. [ laughter ] >> this is real, by the way, this isn't a joke.
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we really filmed this just for fun. >> jimmy: yeah. >> now you have it? >> jimmy: we have it. >> set, and action. >> i am iron man. >> you think you're the only superhero in the world? >> who the hell are you? >> i'd like to talk to you about a business opportunity. >> who the hell are you? >> nick fury, mother [ bleep ]. [ cheers and applause ] [ bleep ], [ bleep ]. >> jimmy: you had to do it. jon favreau, everybody! watch new episodes of "the mandalorian" on disney plus. we'll be back with nicole byer! . because covid is still out there, and so are you.
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you wouldn't believe some of the things people suggested to help me sleep. nature sounds? ahh, no thanks. my friend's white-noise idea. nope. and i'm not counting sheep. not on the... carpet. insomnia can impact both my days and my nights. so i know how important a good night's sleep is. that's why i take quviviq nightly. maybe i should tell them how it works, taye? quviviq works differently than medications you may have taken in the past. it's thought to target one of the biological causes of insomnia: overactive wake signals. and when taken every night, studies showed sleep continued to improve over time. do not take quviviq if you have narcolepsy. don't drink alcohol while taking quviviq or drive or operate heavy machinery until you feel fully alert. quviviq may cause temporary inability to move or talk or hallucinations while falling asleep or waking up. quviviq may cause sleepiness during the day. quviviq may lead to doing activities
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while not fully awake that you don't remember the next day, like walking, driving and making or eating food. worsening depression, including suicidal thoughts, may occur. most common side effects are headaches and sleepiness. it's quviviq. ask your doctor if it's right for you. ♪ ♪ (vo) red lobster's finer points of fun dining: at lobsterfest, whether you're a sea-foodie or a lobster newbie, there's something for everyone. try one of six dishes, like new lobster and shrimp tacos for $17.99. and leave completely lobsessed. welcome to fun dining. your record label is taking off. but so is your sound engineer. you need to hire. i need indeed. indeed you do. indeed instant match instantly delivers quality candidates
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>> jimmy: guillermo, i'm home! [ laughter ] guillermo, have you been using your magic powers again? >> guillermo: you said you wanted corn for a movie night. >> jimmy: i said i wanted popcorn for movie night. [ laughter ] guests are arriving in five minutes. >> guillermo: i have an idea, look at the tv. >> jimmy: oh, it's viral popcorn scooping sensation jason grosbahl. are you rubbing your magic moustache? >> guillermo: yes. >> warm, buttery, delicious orville redenbacher's microwae popcorn is ready in minutes. >> jimmy: thank you. you saved the day. >> guillermo: you're welcome. >> jimmy: i was talking to jason. >> lou: whether watching your favorite blockbuster, awards show, or big name from home, enjoy orville redenbacher's popcorn while doing it.
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orville.com. are we getting a dog? a great dane? two great danes?! i know. giant uncle dane and his giant beard. maybe a dragon? no, dragons are boring. twin sisters! and one is a robot and one is a knight. and i'll be on the side of... the octopus. rawr!!! the volkswagen atlas. more room for possibilities. i got this mountain bike for only $11. dealdash.com the fair and honest bidding site. this kitchenaid mixer sold for less than $26. this i-pad sold for less than $43. and this playstation 5 sold for less than a dollar. i won these bluetooth headphones for $20. i got these three suitcases for less than $40. and shipping is always free. go to dealdash.com right now and see how much you can save.
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>> how are you doing? >> jimmy: you know guillermo because you were kind enough to fill in for me over the summer. >> yes, and he pole danced for me and was so sexy. >> jimmy: that's right. >> guillermo: yes, yes. >> get it, guillermo. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: he's a very sexy man. surprisingly. he slides in under the radar. >> yeah. >> jimmy: right into your drawers, you know? how are you doing? >> oh, listen. i'm fabulous. wearing a tribute to missy elliott, i'm looking good. >> jimmy: i like it. [ cheers and applause ] >> thank you. i didn't realize i was six-time emmy nominated, i thought it was five. >> jimmy: we changed it to six, you've been nominated for an emmy for this appearance on this show tonight! >> do i get the emmy? [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: just the nomination. >> yeah, i know i was just nominated. i'll keep losing to rupaul. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: oh, that's right, yes. rupaul wins every single year. >> i'll never win. >> jimmy: i want to ask you about this vacation you took. >> okay. >> jimmy: you posted a photograph. >> yeah.
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>> jimmy: you do your podcast "best friends" with sasheer zamata from "saturday night live," she is literally your best friend. and here you are with a -- i've been to this place and i know what this is, but explain what's going on. >> they advertise it as swimming with the pigs. but pigs don't swim. you feed them chicken, chicken hot dogs, and they come at you, and they race at you. "gimme that!" you're like, okay. i just want a cute picture. that was fun. the rest of the trip was not good. >> jimmy: well, it's weird. the whole pigs thing is weird. >> it is. >> jimmy: they are very cute. >> did you notice how much they [ bleep ] in the water? [ laughter ] i was like, the fantasy is done, i got to go. >> jimmy: yeah, they're pigs. i mean, it's -- >> what they do. >> jimmy: why they say that about them, yeah. >> oh my god, they were adorable. this airbnb we stayed at was covered in stains. >> jimmy: oh, no. >> it was absolutely disgusting. we were like, we can't stay here. so then my friend christie's boyfriend's best friend's
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brother, who works at a hotel in the bahamas, got us a room at the comfort inn. and boy oh boy, the comfort inn in the bahamas is just a comfort inn. [ laughter ] not cute. very bad. >> jimmy: was it worse than the airbnb you'd left? >> no, that at least smelled clean. know what i mean? >> jimmy: okay, all right. >> they use bleach at the comfort inn, i was happy to be there. we got to go to atlantis the next day. ugh, ugh! atlantis is full of couples who hate each other. [ laughter ] people who were screaming at each other. also the ugliest [ bleep ] there. [ laughter and applause ] my god. >> jimmy: really? >> oh, just -- ugly families and kids screaming. [ laughter ] you couldn't look anywhere without being like, no! it's just not fun. we did 10,000 steps in one day and only went to the beach and the aquarium. it's huge. >> jimmy: yeah. >> for no reason. >> jimmy: yeah. we were one of the ugly families there. [ laughter ] >> you were? oh.
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>> jimmy: yeah, we didn't go to atlantis, we went to one of the other ones. >> you weren't an ugly family. you probably went to the four seasons because there's nothing in the middle except for margaritaville. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: did you go to margaritaville? >> we ended up staying at margaritaville. there are two in the bahamas. i was like, white people got to bring their culture on vacation. [ laughter and applause ] >> jimmy: that's right. margaritaville. >> jimmy buffett, margaritaville! we did make a friend. his name is mr. marley. he was our driver. >> jimmy: oh, that's nice. >> he took us on a tour of bahamas. we got to see dj khaled's house. >> jimmy: oh, really? >> it's like this big, you know? what was i expecting? i was thrown from a jet ski! because my jet ski ran out of gas in the middle of the ocean! >> jimmy: that happened to dj khaled once. >> i'm sure it did, but he had a great big house to go to, i had to go back to margaritaville. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: how did you get back when your jet ski ran out of gas? >> sasheer and i, exploring, let's look at that island! christopher columbus'ing.
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you know, it's [ bleep ]. my earring! >> jimmy: something fell off. >> that's for you. [ laughter ] we were just like -- let's see what it looks like. >> jimmy: i think i can get it in my ear. is it a clip-on? >> no, it's like a little guy -- there you go. [ cheers and applause ] i like it, that looks nice. doesn't want to stay on you either. oh, boy. >> jimmy: sorry, i interrupted your gas story. >> you looked beautiful. >> jimmy: thank you very much. >> i'll stop for you. >> jimmy: i couldn't resist. >> okay, so we're in the middle of the ocean. we're having a nice time. my jet ski's like -- it just stops. she's like, "should i stay?" i'm like, "bitch, you've got to go get help." [ laughter ] is the earth flat? she was gone for so long. did she fall off? what happened? she comes back with a child. because the company was run by children. it was mr. marley's cousins. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: oh, of course. >> he had the hookup. and this child forgot rope. so he's just pulling my jet ski
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with his hands. and we get to the little alcove, they fill it up, and they're like, "get back on." so i get on, she starts to get on, and that child tried to get on. i was like, we can't do this, a fat, a thin, and a thin, no. you can do a thin and a thin, a fat and a thin, but not a fat, a thin, a thin. the math isn't mathing. i just started toppling over. i kind of hunkered down like, not today! then i was thrown in the ocean. it was terrible. and then on new year's eve, we went to go see fireworks. nobody knew where the fireworks were happening. when they finally happened, the server threw her tray, drinks and everything, because she thought it was gunshots, and ducked under the bar. [ laughter and applause ] >> jimmy: wow. >> wild. >> jimmy: wow, this is not a great commercial for a trip to the bahamas. >> uh-uh, no. never go back, no. keep it. it was pretty, though. >> jimmy: wow. that's crazy. so this is your second season of your show? >> yeah.
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>> jimmy: "grand crew." a group of friends -- i'm boiling it down, but that hang out in a wine bar? >> yeah, it's -- you know, professionals. 30-somethings. we talk about love, jobs, our relationships with each other. it's really fun. my character's name is nikki. >> jimmy: is that a coincidence that the character's name is nikki? >> yeah, because my girlfriend's named nicole? it's not a coincidence. my friend phil, who created the show, wrote the part for me. >> jimmy: i see. >> which never happens. so he's like, "i wrote you something." i was like, "thank god, thank you so much." then i just feel so lucky i get to do it. >> jimmy: yeah, well congratulations. >> thank you. >> jimmy: you know what, i think -- [ applause ] each season, you'll get better vacations. >> i hope so. i want to go somewhere where it's chill and relaxing and the most exciting thing is someone [ bleep ]s, you know what i mean? [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] all i want. >> jimmy: i think i know what you mean. season two of "grand crew" premieres friday on nbc. [ cheers and applause ]
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>> lou: the "jimmy kimmel live" concert series is presented by mercedes-benz. the all-electric mercedes-benz lineup is here. >> jimmy: well, thanks to jon favreau and nicole byer. apologies to matt damon. we ran out of time for him. "nightline" is next but first -- her album "dirt femme" is out now. here with the song "borderline," tove lo! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ ♪ ♪ good people do bad things too pretend they don't know ♪ ♪ but they do it takes one to know you're mine ♪ ♪ you and me, we are one of a kind, it's true i like to my feel ♪ ♪ my bones when they crash into my heart i like the taste of blood ♪ ♪ when you're tearin' me apart i like to push you ♪ ♪ to the edge as long as you say you're mine borderline ♪
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♪ hey tonight, for the rest of my life ♪ ♪ i'm gonna be stuck on you hold on 'til i'm makin' it right ♪ ♪ no other love felt like you i can't give it up ♪ ♪ on this fight i cross my heart and hope to die ♪ ♪ borderline tonight, for the rest of my life ♪'m gonna be std on 'til i'm makin' it right ♪ ♪ no other love felt like you i can't give it up ♪ ♪ on this fight i cross my heart and hope to die ♪ ♪ borderline lost in the magic with you a pretty disguise ♪ ♪ from the truth truth is ugly don't open your eyes ♪ ♪ i can change, i can change with just one more lie i like to feel ♪ ♪ my bones when they crash into my heart i like the taste of blood ♪ ♪ when you're tearin' me apart i like to push you ♪ ♪ to the edge as long as you say you're mine borderline ♪
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♪ hey tonight, for the rest of my life ♪ ♪ i'm gonna be stuck on you hold on 'til i'm makin' it right ♪ ♪ no other love felt like you i can't give it up ♪ ♪ on this fight i cross my heart and hope to die ♪ ♪ borderline tonight, for the rest of my life ♪ ♪ i'm gonna be stuck on you hold on 'til i'm makin' it right ♪ ♪ no other love felt like you i can't give it up ♪ ♪ on this fight i cross my heart and hope to die ♪ ♪ borderline ♪ ♪ ♪ i like to push you to the edge ♪ ♪ as longas you say you're mine borderline ♪ ♪ tonight, for the rest of my life i'm gonna be stuck on you ♪ ♪ hold on 'til i'm makin' it right no other love ♪ ♪ felt like you i can't give it up on this fight ♪ ♪ i cross my heart and hope to die borderline ♪
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♪ tonight, for the rest of my old ontil i'm makin' it on you ♪ right no other love ♪ ♪ felt like you i can't give it up on this fight ♪ ♪ i cross my heart and hope to die borderline ♪ ♪ ♪ stuck on you felt like you hope to die ♪ ♪ i know i said that i could change ♪ ♪ ♪ my madness is beautiful ♪ ♪ i cross my heart and hope to die ♪ [ cheers and applause ]
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♪ this is "nightline." >> tonight, famous fakeouts. from silicon valley to the halls of congress, new york republican george santos, the latest caught in the crosshairs, facing multiple investigations. >> did you ever think that the person who allegedly scammed you could end up in the halls of congress? >> the real people he's allegedly wronged. >> i think he needs to lie more than he needs to breathe. >> now a cultural obsession, joining the notorious list that includes anna delvey and elizabeth holmes. >> con artists, you get to see them climb the latter of ac, success, then see exactly how they fall from grace. >> why we can't look away.
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