this is "nightline." tonight, the saga of the dug guards. the star of the hit reality show "19 kids and counting" opening up about the conservative christian family we saw on screen, family drama she says happened off camera including what she describes as her father's iron grip. >> you felt that your father tricked you into signing a contract the night before your

wedding? >> i feel like i was tricked into it. >> byron: how she says her parents protected her brother, josh duggar, despite his abuse of her. >> you treat me worse than you treat my brother. >> byron: why she says she's still estranged from her father jimba. back-to-school botox? the first day of school doesn't just mean new backpacks for the children. >> it was like having an instagram filter without an instagram filter. and i was like, wow. >> byron: it can also mean botox. >> school starts, the phones start going off the hook. >> we meet mothers injecting a fresh face into the new school year. >> we want to look on the mom line. my hair will be done, my we tox will be tight. and the moon man goes to -- >> it's the 2023 mtv video music awards. >> the music and moments from tonight's vmas. taylor swift on the pink carpet, shakira reminding the world those hips don't lie.

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hospitals and medical facilities across the country can make a lifetime of difference for sick kids. learn more at starlight .org. >> good evening. thank you for joining us. the duggars were a potent recipe for reality show success. a christian couple and their 19 children, each named starting with the letter j. but

as the years were on, that facade began to crack. now, one of those children who has a family of her own is opening up about what she says the public didn't get to see. here's nightline co-anchor juju chang. >> for as long as i can remember , there was this sense of bewilderment with people looking at our family and just seeing all of us lined up in red dresses, you know, out at wherever. and they are they all yours. we're the duggars. >> jill duggar. dillard, nicknamed sweet jill muffin by her family, lived a seemingly idyllic life as the fourth child of jim, bob and michelle duggar, stars of the hit tlc reality series 19 kids and counting. >> okay, everybody. it is time for breakfast at the conservative christian and ever expanding family, a source of fascination for their strict rules on modest dressing, homeschooling and courting. >> but now jill and her husband, derek dillard, say that wholesome veneer masked a damaging culture of control. >> even if you're an adult, even

if you're you've been an adult for a long time. you're married with kids. if your parents don't give their blessing, then you're not honoring them. and the family becoming embroiled in scandal. >> what's it like to know that your your parents were protecting your abuser? the couple now discussing what they say cameras didn't capture in their book counting the cost. but what were the costs in the way that you took? account of them? >> the biggest one is relationships, closeness and relationships with my family. that's been one of the biggest costs. >> as millions of fans watched as jill grew from a teen on 19 kids and counting to a wife and mom starring in a namesake show, jill and jessa counting on appearing on multiple covers of people magazine, jill's courtship with her now husband, derek, was a central plotline in the family's reality show. the couple following strict dating rules, having chaperons on limited touching and no kissing. you had courtship rules. what struck you as odd, if any of it? >> it was unusual. i wasn't used

to being 25 and having to have someone with me at all times. >> derek did to me for my kids. they're very first kiss was on their wedding day, a ratings bonanza with tlc's cameras rolling. >> what was that like being told your wedding is going to be on tv? i was very much conditioned to it by then. but the night before their wedding, the couple say jim bob surprised his 23 year old daughter with the signature page of this contract , which committed her to years of filming. and she says she unwittingly signed. did you write in the book that you felt that your father, quote, tricked you into signing a contract the night before your wedding? >> yeah, i do. i feel like i was tricked into it. >> derek, you're a lawyer. you referred to this contract as a fraud. >> i think the biggest thing was it was a contract. we wouldn't have agreed to based on the terms that were given the 2014 contract detailing payments to the family starting at $50,000 per half hour episode and

$65,000 for hour long specials. >> as jill says, the money was controlled by her father. the idea that you weren't paid and yet your wedding attracted 4.4 million viewers. you were in many ways the stars of the show . >> yeah, even the show. soon after that was named jill and jessa counting on. and we still weren't seeing income even at that point. jill filmed over 200 episodes and two dozen specials with her family, but she says she never received a paycheck until she and derek confronted jim bob about it. >> you write openly, you got a check for $175,000, but in many ways, the revenue you generated, one could argue, was considerably more than that. yes jim bob and michelle duggar devoted followers of the institute in basic life principles, a fundamentalist christian order that promotes strict purity and control and gender roles where the family must obey the father. >> we believe in honoring our parents. we're christians, but we don't believe honoring is the

same as obedience. yeah the institute organizing family conferences like this one in big sandy, texas, reinforced their faith and values. >> nightline was there in 2011. so were the duggars. long time no see at the time. the eldest duggar child, josh, had been married for three years. >> there's many different definitions of courtship, but for us it meant really choosing purity, choosing to wait for a lot of things that people would take for granted. so our first kiss was on our wedding day. >> just four years later, josh acknowledged that he molested five girls when he was just 14, including four of his sisters. jill says she told authorities about the abuse. josh never faced charges. 19 kids and counting. the show that made the family a fortune was canceled after the shocking headlines came to light. tasked with damage control, jill says she and her sister jessa felt they had to give an interview to fox news to protect the family brand.

>> it was like, okay, we need you to like, fall in line here and do these interviews for the show. go here, do this thing and that thing to kind of like rally the troops and get it back together. jess and i were talking. we're like, oh my goodness. the most of the stuff out there is lies. it's not truth. and so for truth's sake, we want to come out and set the record straight. >> i was surprised to read that josh was in the room. yeah off camera? yeah >> yeah. >> what do you see in that 24 year old girl who's talking? >> i didn't want to be there. i wanted to help my parents and i felt like i was the only one who could do this. i was the only one who could fill that role. >> tlc kept the lucrative duggar franchise going without josh launching that new series called jill and jessa counting on. but derek and jill say they wanted to start their own lives free from the television cameras when we weren't complying with the jill and jessa script, it was threatened to us like, do you all want to come home and everyone to know that this show was canceled because of you?

jill also says small acts of independence, such as wearing pants and getting a nose ring, were met with hostility. >> anyone who is making decisions is for themselves that the parents don't give their blessing. that's seen as rebellious. >> eventually, the couple stopped filming altogether after breaking with the family watch ing the way that my parents is kind of protected, my brother. >> but then on used me and some of my sisters. it was hard and it's still hard to swallow. there's like one point where i call my dad out about it and i just say, like, you treat me worse than you treat my brother or my brother that's got to be painful. it's yeah, it is. >> in 2021, josh was convicted of receiving child and is now serving 12.5 years in prison. derek attended court every day. what was the kaleidoscope of emotions owns? >> there was a lot of support, guys, you know, um, anger just

bewilderment, disbelief that people could believe that this didn't happen because to me, the evidence was so clear. >> you in the book called josh a monster and you say that you wanted him to be put away for a very long time. >> do you feel like you'll ever reach out to your brother? >> i have one time. just because i didn't know what to do. so i sent like a handmade christmas card to him, but then it got sent back. i don't think i'm on his list. >> in a statement to abc news, jim bob and michelle duggar said, we aim to deal honorably with our children, our finances and our endeavors. while imperfect, it is our intent and desire to live a life that honors christ. we do not believe the best way to resolve conflicts, facilitate forgiveness and reconciliation, or to communicate through difficulties is through the media or in a public forum. so we will not comment further. the couple say today the relationship with jill's parents is still strained. and how often do you interact act with your

dad, especially about with your family in general, like i'll see my mom at sister get togethers for brunch or birthdays, stuff like that. >> my dad's relationships a little more complicated, but is it fair to say you're a straight edge? oh, yeah, for sure. yeah, for sure. there's like tension there that we recognize. i think beside the weddings and funerals, i that was the only time that i'd seen him after freddy was born in the last five years, probably freddy youngest of jill and derek's three boys, was born last year. >> the couple hopes to raise their family and live on their own terms. >> i would definitely say that trying to disentangle what i've been taught growing up and everything, it's a journey and you need to give yourself grace and recognize. let you can have those positive and negative experiences. they can coexist. you can have both our thanks to

juju jill duggar. >> dillard's book is out now. up next, why some mothers are adding botox to this year's list of back to school supplies. as. of back to school supplies. as. i have moderate to severe f my 's means everything to me. ♪ ♪ ♪ control is everything to me. ♪ feel significant symptom relief with skyrizi, including less abdominal pain and fewer bowel movements at 4 weeks. skyrizi is the first and only il-23 inhibitor for crohn's that can deliver both clinical remission and endoscopic improvement. the majority of people on skyrizi achieved long lasting remission at 1 year. serious allergic reactions and an increased risk of infections or a lower ability to fight them may occur. tell your doctor if you have an infection or symptoms, had a vaccine or plan to. liver problems may occur in crohn's disease. ask your gastroenterologist how you can take control

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that fill your home with warmth and cheer. you happy kids heal faster. >> that's why starlight children's foundation is dedicated to improving the mental well-being of sick kids regardless of their illness or injury. when a child is hospitalized, they are scared, lonely and stressed. being in hospital, facing painful treatments takes away from the happiness of childhood. but that's where starlight comes in. at >> byron: welcome back. it's that time of year again. kids are returning to the classroom. make maybe picture day is around the corner. for some mothers, back to school means they want to look picture-perfect. here's abc's janai norman. >> reporter: at home with her

two daughters, jacqueline walker is glowing. her skin, flawless. >> i have botox every three months. in my forehead, around my crow's feet. >> reporter: jacqueline's botox specialists make sure she looks her best, running around aiv a 5 and 3-year-old. what about when you don't have time to do all of that? when it's been six months, if ever, and a chance to get botox? >> whoa. no, no, no. i haven't gone that long. >> reporter: more often than not, making time for herself is a balancing act. >> my kids come before me no matter what. >> whoa, good job! >> everything that i would ever want to do would come to a halt for anything that my kids need. >> reporter: as summer vacation ends, jacqueline now has a kindergartner on her hands. the first day of school came quick.

it meant backing pack backs but also more botox. hair, nails, lashes. self-care mode in full throttle. what is it about this time of year specifically, back to school? what is it? >> well -- we want to look good on the mom line. for me, i want to make my daughters proud of me. i want them to be happy, that my mom, she looks so pretty. when i show up on the school line, i want to be a pretty mom. >> reporter: maybe i should rethink how i show up to the mom line. >> my hair will be done, my botox will be tight. >> reporter: is this something that you talk to other moms about? >> i do. it's a lot of maintenance when you're 37. >> reporter: but it's not out of the ordinary to jacqueline. having mom and daughter start the school year confidently is important to her. >> got the meme, we got this, and then -- >> matching knapsack that has

her name on it too. >> this is amazing. >> yeah. >> reporter: why did you start getting botox? >> i realized that my skin just wasn't the same anymore. i was developing a lot more lines. maybe because i was so tired. makeup wasn't going on as easily. i was getting a lot of creases. >> reporter: botox gets her what she wants. >> it was like having an instagram filter without an instagram filter. and i was like, wow. this is incredible. why did i wait so long? i would say botox is making me happy? in a way. when i look at myself, i feel better about myself. >> by eliminating the wrinkles and lines on the face, your smile might get a little brighter, your eyes seem more open. >> reporter: dr. ryan glatt, a board certified plastic surgeon, says he's noticed botox become popular with parents as the school year begins. >> this time of year when school starts, the phones start going off the hook, last-minute

appointments. people want their treatment and want to look their best. >> reporter: dr. glatt's patient, jacqueline turner, also a mom of two -- >> you're not seeing all your mom friends throughout the summer, everybody has different schedules and travel plans. >> reporter: she says botox is part of her and her friends' back-to-school routine. >> as a mom, i really like having these appointments to look forward to. because sometimes you go days without taking time to yourself. >> raise your eye brows for me. >> i wan see there's slight bumps, but by the time i get in my car to leave, the bumps should pretty much be gone. >> takes three to seven days to work but is effective. >> reporter: in the u.s., people spend $2 billion a year on botox. anywhere from 5 to 7 million botox procedures are done every year, making it the number one minimally invasive cosmetic procedure nationwide. the popularity of botox goes far beyond the mom line at school.

>> botox and injectable fillers have really become part of a regular beauty ritual for people. >> reporter: med spas and clinics zeroing in on parents, back-to-school specials offering botox for as low as $9 a unit on the lower end of botox pricing. >> toxins, botox, they have a cost associated with them. and if a deal seems a little too good to be true, it may be. >> reporter: botox isn't casual. even though botox parties, combining injectables with social get-togethers, happen all the time. >> these procedures, they're medical procedures. they need to be treated as such. botox works, okay, by relaxing the muscles that make those lines. smile huge. relax. i'm going to target the belly of that muscle. >> did you have any questions? >> reporter: in the right setting and done by a licensed and trained professional, botox is considered safe. according to the fda, some of

the serious but rare side effects include double vision or trouble saying words or swallowing. what about the idea of back-to-school botox coupons? >> let's get them. >> yeah? >> i want them. >> reporter: botox usually isn't cheap. the average cost is nearly $500 a visit, and you need repeated sessions which means not everyone is getting it. the fact is, more than 80% of the people who got botox in 2020 were white. right now, jacqueline's getting the results she wants. >> eventually, i don't think botox is always going to work. i'm going to have to accept it. so i'll embrace when it it comes. i mean, botox could only take you so far. >> reporter: last year, jacqueline went back to school and got her master's in clinical social work. friday morning was madeline's big day. priding herself on beauty but also brains. >> i tell my daughters first,

you're so, so smart. you're so smart, you're so beautiful inside. we live in a world where looks do matter, but it's not number one. >> our thanks to janai. up next, from taylor swift and a boy band reunion to shakira proving it once again, the sights and sounds of this year's vmas. ♪ ♪ feeling sluggish or weighed down? could be a sign that your digestive system isn't at its best. but a little metamucil everyday can help. metamucil's psyllium fiber gels to trap and remove the waste that weighs you down and also helps lower cholesterol and slows sugar absorption to promote healthy blood sugar levels. so you can feel lighter and more energetic. lighten everyday the metamucil way. feel less sluggish & weighed down after just 14 days.

sign up for the 2 week challenge at metamucil.com (owner) purina one... we switched and wow! from day 1, its proven natural nutrition feel less sluggish & weighed down after just 14 days. supports charlie's strong immune system... and ginger's healthy heart. (vo) healthy differences today and for a lifetime. purina one. a difference from day one. - bye, bye cough. - later chest congestion. hello 12 hours of relief. 12 hours!! not coughing? hashtag still not coughing?! mucinex dm gives you 12 hours of relief from chest congestion and any type of cough, day or night. mucinex dm. it's comeback season. welcome back. >> it's that time of year again . kids are returning to the classroom. maybe picture day is just around the corner, but for some mothers back to school means they want to look picture perfect. here's abc's janai norman. at home with her two daughters jacqueline walker is glowing her skin flawless. >> i have botox every three months in my forehead and a of l the world you got this without having to say a thing. fashion is what you buy. style is what you own. you own. >> ooh. stuffed up again just sinex, breathe, ahhhh!

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>> byron: finally tonight, the stars were out at the vmas. nicki minaj was back by popular demand to both host and perform her recent single "last time i saw you." handing a starstruck taylor swift the best happy? >> kids heal faster that's why starlight children's foundation is dedicated to improving the mental well-being of sick kids. regardless of their illness or injury. when a child is hospitalized, they are scared, lonely and stressed. being in hospital, facing painful treatments takes away from the happiness of childhood. but that's where starlight comes in. at sta your dollar shakira delivering a bilingual medley of hits like "she wolf." ♪ there's a she wolf ♪ >> byron: before being honored with the video vanguard award, promising that there's more where that came from. that's "nightline" for this evening. catch our full episodes on hulu. we'll see you right back here sameime tomorrow. thanks for the company, america. good night.