live and on demand through the abc seven bay area connected tv app. it's available for apple tv, google tv, amazon fire tv, as well as roku. download the app now so you can start streaming. all right. thank you so much for joining us tonight. i'm ama daetz. >> and i'm dan ashley for sandhya patel larry beil all of us. we appreciate your time right now on jimmy kimmel. the charming and incredibly talented lionel richie. >> we hope you have a great night. >> lou: from hollywood, it's "jimmy kimmel live!" tonight --

lionel richie, kelly ripa and mark consuelos, plus music from aloe blacc. with cleto and the cletones. and now, jimmy kimmel! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> hi, how are you? i'm jimmy, i'm the host. i appreciate that. thank you for joining us. i'm glad you did. you know what, buckle in. we've got a lot to cover. we are following stories, true stories. we're following stories that are made up. who even knows which ones are which anymore. [ laughter ] who even cares? it's been five weeks since joe biden rode off to the great water aerobics class in the sky. [ laughter ] and since then, so much has happened. so many great things. inflation is up, unemployment is up, eggs cost more than iphones, measles is back, planes are running into each other, i'm getting dizzy just thinking about how great america is

again. in washington, no one seems to know what the hell is going on. eesk is doing the chainsaw massacre of the federal workforce. [ laughter ] the white house put out a memo today warning federal agencies to prepare for mass layoffs. don't worry, none of this will affect the butler who brings trump his diet cokes. [ laughter ] you know, they sent an email, to millions of government employees, instructing them to share five things they accomplished that week. trump said they'd be fired if they didn't. then said they wouldn't be fired. then said they'd be semi-fired. now he's saying they'll be wood-fired. [ laughter ] with caramelized onions and a sprinkling of asiago cheese. guillermo, you don't work for the government, as far as i

know. >> guillermo: no, no. >> jimmy: i thought it would be interesting to ask guillermo to write down five things he did at work. [ laughter ] and you did. you made a list? >> guillermo: yes. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: all right, all right, you really did. there's guillermo's list. [ laughter ] number one, drink tequila. [ cheers and applause ] okay. that probably could have been all five. [ laughter ] number two, go get my -- what is this word? >> guillermo: my credential for the oscars across the street. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: okay. number three, get measurement for my tuxedo for sunday. guillermo will be at the oscars. [ cheers and applause ] number four? >> guillermo: do the live show. do the show. >> jimmy: do that live show? >> guillermo: yes. >> jimmy: that's this show right now? >> guillermo: this show, yes. >> jimmy: number five, "write this stupid list." [ laughter ] number six -- oh, number six, you didn't even need a number

six. "take pictures with that audience." >> guillermo: that audience. >> jimmy: with this audience? >> guillermo: yes. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: oh, all right. this is good ghnchts yeah, this is good. >> jimmy: let me make you i have this straight and on the record. after the show, you will stay and you'll take pictures with everyone in our audience? [ cheers and applause ] >> guillermo: yeah, sure. yeah, i'll take the pictures. >> jimmy: it's on the list. >> guillermo: yeah, i'll take pictures with the audience, yes. with everybody, yes. >> jimmy: did you say with every person in the audience? [ cheers and applause ] >> yeah, everyone. with everybody. how many is it? 200 people? [ laughter ] >> jimmy: go sit down, you're going to be here for quite a while tonight. congratulations, you're employee of the week. [ cheers and applause ] >> guillermo: thank you, yeah! >> jimmy: don't let him leave, by the way. [ laughter ] this little -- it's like one of the -- you know how you have to sometimes catch a -- at a state

fair a greased pig? [ laughter ] just like that. okay? a group of republican senators yesterday met privately with the white house chief of staff, to complain about how these impulsive and haphazard cuts have eliminated 1,400 jobs at the department of veterans affairs. jobs held mostly by veterans, and that is a tricky situation for trump because, he doesn't think much of veterans, but he loves affairs. [ laughter ] so far doge, which is the stupidest name, and i resent having to even say it, they have been just about as efficient as a cyber truck in two inches of snow. [ laughter ] in fairness, you're not supposed to drive them. you can see this whole thing, it's not working. because the maga junior varsity squad is doubling down now. congressbunny lauren boebert wrote, "i didn't realize my distain for these agencies could get any lower." she spelled disdain with a "t."

[ laughter ] maybe let's not get rid of that department of education just yet, huh? [ cheers and applause ] and by the way, when you dislike something, your “distain” gets higher, not lower. [ laughter ] she is fun at musicals though. [ laughter ] the good news is that, while elon is busy throwing the country in a blender, he's making plenty of money. according to the "washington post," the faa had a $2.4 billion contract with verizon to upgrade their communications. now they're going to cancel that contract and award to it a company called starlink, which is owned by -- guess who? [ boos ] that's right, elon musk. oh, no, there's nothing shady about it at all. [ laughter ] all in, companies owned by elon musk have now been the recipient of more than $30 billion. billion with a "b." and nut is with an "n." [ laughter ] putting elon musk in charge of

government contracts is like putting pac man in charge of our fruit. [ laughter ] it's a bad idea. but no one is cashing in more bigly than our cheerless leader, donald trump. i guess because the billions from his bitcoin and the nfts and the truth social stock, that's not enough. he's now making money off money. the stable genius who brought us trump coins not so long ago is now hawking dollar bills made of gold. that's right. that's the trump gold dollar bill. one gold dollar bill goes for $34.99. you can get three dollar bills for $100. and ten for $300. that's the package i'm going to get. [ laughter ] it's the most reasonable. this is quite a racket he's got going. he's got coins, he's got bills, he's got bibles, and now he's got this. >> hello, everyone, this is your favorite president, donald j. trump, with some very exciting news about a bigly new product from my amazingly huge brain. this beautiful necklace made of real 9-karat gold featuring

jesus on one side and me on the other. [ applause ] the donald trump double cross. no one has been crucified more than jesus -- and me. we were both crude guyed like you wouldn't believe. many were saying i was even more crucified than him. i was crucified through the roof. religion and christianity are the biggest things missing from this country. and now you can celebrate god and me wherever you go. wear us to church. pin us to your favorite hat. hang us on the rear-view mirror of your exploding cyber truck. so hot. everyone loves the trump double cross. but don't just take it from me. take it from my good friend, jesus himself. >> you've gotta buy this neckl necklace, you gotta. >> thank you, jesus. the donald trump double cross, available for only $999.99.

if you don't bly one, you will go to hell. there you have it. let's make america pray again. god bless you, and god bless the usa. [ cheers and applause ] didn't hurt. >> jimmy: we know all about donald trump. speaking of double crosses. tomorrow, trump is meeting with president zelensky of ukraine who's coming to the united states. trump claims they've reached a deal to create what is being called a “reconstruction investment fund." basically, they will give us access to their valuable minerals in exchange for us not letting putin kill them all. in other words, the guy who was impeached for trying to extort ukraine tomorrow is planning to do it again in front of everyone. ukraine has a third of the world's lithium reserves, which is what they use in batteries for electric cars. man, if only trump knew somebody who could use that sort of thing, you know? [ laughter ] and then we have the jeffrey epstein “list” which trump kinda, sorta promised to release.

attorney general pam bondi yesterday made a big announcement. she announced the list of epstein clients and his flight logs would be released today at noon. guess what? they weren't released today at noon. instead, they released binders full of information everyone already had. everything these people do is screwed up. last night, twitter listed this at the top of the twitter home page. "epstein files to unveil names on february 29th." [ laughter ] just enough time for trump to ban all future leap years. [ laughter ] "we're going to release the list on march 36th!" [ laughter ] what they released contain any new information. instead of the real news media, instead of journalists, they released the binders to a small group of obscure right-wing influencers. one of them is a former miss universe judge. another one is a former host from one america news, who was not happy with what she got. >> i share your frustration.

you should have seen how pissed attorney general bondi and fbi director kash patel were in this meeting when they were explaining to us what happened. the story here is incredibly important. that not only is the trump administration trying to give you transparency, but that the deep state agents are trying to hide it. >> jimmy: that's right. the deep state agents are trying to hide it. well, first, the deep state agents need to go through the documents to make sure they dot every "i" and cross out every "djt." [ laughter ] then they can release the documents. the fact that these loony tunes keep conveniently forgetting is that donald trump and jeffrey epstein were good friends is unbelievable. "new york" magazine did a profile of jeffrey epsteinbach in 2002. and here's the quote from trump, "i've known jeff for fifteen years. terrific guy, he's fun to be with. it's said he likes beautiful woman as much as i do, and some of them are on the younger side." no doubt about it.

jeffrey enjoys his social life. donald trump and jeffrey epstein had a party at mar-a-lago - they called it a “calendar girl” competition they flew in 28 girls, the only men at the party were him and jeffrey epstein. it was him, jeffrey epstein, and 28 very disappointed calendar girls. [ laughter ] i hope that's in the binder when it comes out. [ cheers and applause ] this is a big weekend, you know. in hollywood, this is like the biggest weekend of the year. on sunday, the oscars, hosted by conan o'brien, are here on abc. it just so happens the oscars take place at the dolby theatre right across the street. and we wanted to get a sense of what the fans are talking about, so we sent our reporter out to the street for a 97th oscars edition of "breaking the news." >> breaking the news! awards edition! ow! the movies. are they still popular? why so many people who would rather stay home and watch pornography can't name a single nominated picture.

>> i don't know. >> that's what i'm saying. >> tonight! >> the substance. a movie about a distier yus liquid that turns any woman attractive. hold up for a second. and i have it right here. hold on. how are you doing, girl? there you are. tonight. >> tonight, right? >> yes, tonight. >> where we going? >> consenting adults! >> we've heard it a hundred times, hollywood is run by old white guys. but what about the old white guys who don't run hollywood? the lunch pail larrys. the punch clock petes. that feels nothing when he touches his wife friends. >> and how would you like me to respond? >> exactly like that. >> fred is dead inside! >> everybody is cheering for adrian brody and "the brutalist."

the story of an architect who tries to make it in the good old usa. after escaping the horrors of the holocaust. and then being brutalized by his benefactor. let's do aun aura. let's do anora. everybody's cheering for aknow ra! the story of a sex work history falls in love with a drug-addicted oligarch's son. and my exclusive interview with oscar host, conan o'brien, you'll see only here on btn. good luck. >> thank you. >> shorter in person! >> hollywood's top talents are already preparing for their next roles. let's go find some. look at this. >> how are you? >> sir elton john in "mad max 4." dj khaled in "bobblehead: the fernando valenzuela story." demi moore as fonzie.

lupita nyong'o go as jackie joiner customersy. adam driver in "the story of the ramones." nicholas cage as tom petty. look at this, pam nosw sheeran. >> hello. >> i'm in love with the shape of you. >> thank you so much. >> belly laughs! >> we're on hollywood boulevard asking pedestrians the question we normally ask celebrities. who are you wearing? >> who am i wearing? >> yes. >> i'm not wearing anything. >> and why haven't you used your platform to raise awareness for aids? why no ribbon? >> i have no idea. >> we speak to pro-aids activist named -- >> kurd. >> kurt. >> kurt is canceled! >> one witch, two witch, red witch, green witch, everybody loves "wicked!" but is witchcraft real? tonight, i speak to a real-life witch, my ex-wife tina, through her attorney. that was no picnic, sure, but

our bedroom wasn't exactly defying gravity. >> yeah! >> and the price of eggs keeps going through the roof! >> whoo! >> after sports. [ applause ] >> jimmy: all right, we got a fun show for you tonight. kelly ripa and mark consuelos are here. we've got music from aloe blacc. and we'll be right back with lionel richie.

[ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> jimmy: hey, there, welcome back. tonight, the first lady and gentleman of daytime tv. on monday morning, they host their annual “live! with kelly & mark after the oscars” special. kelly ripa and mark consuelos are with us.

[ cheers and applause ] and later, from laguna hills right here in california, his new album "stand together" comes out tomorrow, aloe blacc is here. [ cheers and applause ] next week, we've got new shows with a stellar list of guests including -- ben stiller, danny mcbride, mike epps, from “severance.” sarah bock, from white lotus, lisa from blackpink and walton goggins will be here. regina hall will be with us. we'll have music from wunderhouse, phantogram, and balu brigada. our first guest tonight is a bonafide music legend who taught us the words “tam bo li de, say de moi ya.” [ laughter ] which mean, nothing and everything. he is judge and star-maker on “american idol” which returns to abc sunday, march 9th. please welcome lionel richie!

[ cheers and applause ] ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: please, please. lionel, this is an exciting night for you, yes, but especially for me. >> for you. >> jimmy: first of all, i'm always excited when you're here. >> thank you very much. >> jimmy: but i'm especially excited because you have just announced the title and cover of your forthcoming memoir. >> forthcoming? >> jimmy: yeah. [ laughter ] >> oh, yes, forthcoming. that scared me for a moment. no, no, no -- >> jimmy: you don't have to write three more. >> no, back off. [ laughter ] you have no idea. but you are the inspiration behind writing the book. >> jimmy: thank you. >> and i'll tell you why. >> jimmy: go ahead. >> every time i'd come on the show you'd say, "tell me one more story. >> jimmy: yeah, yeah. >> and i realize you know more

stories than i have in the book. [ laughter ] so i had to stop telling you stories and write the book. >> jimmy: i was going to write the book for you. [ laughter ] >> yeah, i know. >> jimmy: eventually. >> i know. >> jimmy: you have some great stories. >> i -- it's all in there. >> jimmy: i like the title. i like the cover. "truly" is the name of the memoir. [ cheers and applause ] >> yeah, yeah. >> jimmy: after the song -- >> so i got to tell you, i got to tell you the problems we had on finding the title. >> jimmy: did you? >> yeah, because i started writing the book. and the editor would say, "no, this didn't happen." "that can't be true." "this has got to be a lie." >> jimmy: and? >> so i thought maybe i'd make the title of the book, "can't make this [ bleep ] up." [ laughter ] and i thought, maybe that would work. then i said, that might not work. "lies, lies and more lies." "the true live story of lionel richie." then just the obvious one which is, "nah."

[ laughter ] so what is the other side of a lie? truth. >> jimmy: the truth, yes. >> truly. >> jimmy: we could use some truth nowadays. >> we could use some truth, yes, yes, yes, yes. >> jimmy: great. i have a few thoughts on this. first of all, you told me once that you couldn't write a book until some people died. who died? [ laughter ] >> actually, they didn't. so i had to be gingerly around certain areas. you're still going to get the truth. >> jimmy: uh-huh? >> but not as definite as i would like it to be. >> jimmy: i see. [ laughter ] not as colorful as you would like it to be? >> not as colorful as i would -- >> jimmy: do you tell the story in the book as you once told me as we were sitting together a couch, not on the show, which i could not possibly believe, but that -- about the commodores. and i asked you about what happened when you went to them and said, "hey, things are going

really well for me solo, i'm going to leave the band," and you told me that they actually kicked you out of the band? is that in there? >> well, jimmy. you know -- [ laughter ] part of that gingerly thing i was talking about. >> jimmy: uh-huh? >> yeah, well, no. it was just understandably, the things that were happening around that time -- >> jimmy: yeah. >> kenny rogers song "endless love" was happening. and then "truly" came out. >> jimmy: because i would have named the book -- i would have put them all on the cover and called it, "can you believe these idiots kicked me out of the band?" [ applause ] >> you know -- you know -- you just took two years of gingerly going around things -- guys, guys, he's just joking. guys, he's just joking. >> jimmy: will we learn about

your romantic conquests, the first time you and kenny rogers made love, for instance? [ laughter ] will we be privy to those? >> on second thought -- i was going to call you to see if you remembered anything about my life, and something told me not to call you. >> jimmy: yeah, yeah, you made the right -- >> yeah. >> jimmy: have you heard the story -- maybe you know the story. you must know this story. >> i'm so worried. >> jimmy: there's a story about rick james, okay? >> yeah. >> jimmy: the story goes -- >> it's true, it's true. no matter -- whatever it is -- i'm sorry, go ahead. >> jimmy: this is one of the stories -- he went to the office of the president of motown, which was your record label, his record label. his record has not done well. he was unhappy. he dumped a bunch of cocaine on the guy's desk. he snorted it. he removed his, shall we say, penis from his tight, sparkly pants. >> yes, yes. >> jimmy: he put it into the guy's face and said, "sell more of my records."

and then the guy let him out, closed the door, and said, "from now on, we're putting all our marketing power behind lionel richie instead of rick james." [ laughter and applause ] is that a true story? >> i cannot confirm or den night that story. [ laughter ] you know -- i'm under pressure out here. you know, when you have a publisher that says, "just tip around the edges, don't reveal." >> jimmy: yeah. >> yeah, no -- that was rumor. >> jimmy: that was a rumor? >> that was a rumor. >> jimmy: that was a rumor? >> yes, yes. >> jimmy: that's true, then, for sure. [ laughter ] >> you need to write my book. >> jimmy: we do have a picture of you guys together. i think this is from -- >> yeah, my boy. >> jimmy: was this the night you recorded "we are the world"? >> no. >> jimmy: that was not. that was a different one? >> i think neither one of us remember that night. [ laughter ] there was some things in life you just don't remember.

the hardest thing i've had to do in my life is go back and remember, not the stories, but what year. >> jimmy: oh. >> i can't tell you. it all runs together. >> jimmy: this happened in 1980. >> ah. >> jimmy: here's you and michael jackson. and what is michael jackson wearing there? >> all right. i'll tell you the story. >> jimmy: okay. >> that's michael sitting there going, "could you recognize me in the audience? i'm in disguise." [ laughter ] and i go, "the whole room saw you, what are you talking about?" >> jimmy: so he felt that he was blending to the point where nobody would know it was him? >> can i tell you -- read the book. the book is crazy. >> jimmy: uh-huh? >> but most of all, it has a lot of comedy, a lot of moments when you realize that that was a real moment in time. >> jimmy: yeah. >> it is all the tragedy, all the laughter and the self-doubt. it's just -- it's -- i'm glad -- >> jimmy: i'm glad you're still

speaking to the commodores. i wouldn't talk to them ever again if i was you. [ laughter ] >> you know, you're not helping things. >> jimmy: you know i'm not here to help. the book comes out on september 30th. >> yes, sir. >> jimmy: lionel richie is with us. we'll have more with lionel when we return. congratulations. here's the water heater that somehow passed inspection but will definitely flood your basement. -wait. -congratulations. here's your first year's supply of nitrogen fertilizer. remember, not too little or too much or you'll kill your lawn. -okay. -congratulations. here's progressive's homequote explorer. -uh-oh. -you're good. you can quickly compare insurance options and find the right coverage even if it's not with us. what's the bad news? [ indistinct conversations ] i skipped the line. ♪ ♪ if you went on a road trip and you didn't stop for mcdonald's, that wasn't a road trip. it was just a really long drive.

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i mean, i know how the fire affected me, and there's always a constant fear that who's to say something like that won't happen again? that's fair. we committed to underground, 10,000 miles of electric line. you look back at where we were 10 years ago and we are in a completely different place today, and it's because of how we need to care for our communities and our customers. i hope that's true. [joe] that's my commitment. [ambient noise]

♪ that's why i'm easy yeah ♪ ♪ i'm easy like sunday morning ♪

♪ morning yeah ♪ >> oh, man. oh, man. >> i'm going to tell you something. when you're standing in front of the artist and you're going to sing our song, the only thing we pray for is that, please god, make it your song. >> yeah. >> you made my song your song. >> lionel, that means the world, honestly. i'm shaking a bit. >> it was beautifully done. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: we're back with lionel richie, host of "american idol." a judge on "american idol." lionel, did -- that man is not an american, as far as i could tell? [ laughter ] >> he is -- >> jimmy: what is he doing on our show? >> he is clearly not an american. >> jimmy: is that allowed? >> yes, it is. in fact, they fly over from all over the world to compete. and by the way, it's amazing where they're coming from. i mean, from australia, from dubai, from -- i mean, they'll show up and say, "i want to compete on "american idol.""

>> jimmy: is it crazy to you that a young man like that, from england, i presume, knows your music? >> let me just say it. europe, the kids this tall, they got it down. >> jimmy: really? >> every note of every song. >> jimmy: really? what do you attribute that to? why is it different from here? >> parents. parents and grandparents. >> jimmy: why are -- what are our parents doing, not listening? [ laughter ] >> no, no, believe it or not, what's happening on "american idol," they say, my grandmother, my mom and dad, they walk out and say, can you sign this record? they bring the record. no, no, it's happening right here. >> jimmy: i would like to ask you about the oscars, because it's happening on sunday. >> yes. >> jimmy: you won an oscar. >> yes. >> jimmy: you were nominated for -- [ cheers and applause ] -- two other times, right? i know you won for "say you, say me." >> and i lost with "endless love." >> jimmy: can you believe you lost with "endless love"? >> no, i can't!

i can't believe i lost -- i'm sorry that you would bring that up. >> jimmy: "endless love" is the title of the movie, first of all, which should get you some points just so tart with. >> nine weeks at number one, versus office theme four, five weeks. nine weeks, five weeks? i got the oscar. >> jimmy: you thought you were going to win. >> i'm sitting on the row. there's burt and carol and peter allen. they're down here. i think, they put me on the end because it's easier to run up to the stage. [ laughter ] i'm there, i'm ready to go, right? and the winner is -- arthur stein. and i had to go, "congratulations, congratulations." >> jimmy: christopher cross in front of you. >> christopher cross. >> jimmy: in front of you. >> in front of me. "congratulations, christopher." [ laughter ] i wanted to kill him. [ applause ] >> jimmy: is that in the book? you're going to have to write a couple of books. >> so where we are now is that my life is continuing.

so -- >> jimmy: that's good. [ laughter ] >> yes. so last week -- so last week, i called and said, oh, my god, i've got to put this in the book. "lionel, volume 2." >> jimmy: yeah, yeah. >> "think of volume 2." >> jimmy: volume 2 is going to be "as told to jimmy kimmel" is going to be volume 2. we're going to get all the stuff you were ginger about in the first one. >> i know, i know. >> jimmy: i know there's a lot. >> i know, but i mean, the fact that we're friends, it's not fair. after they come out and interview the two of us here -- >> jimmy: you know what i want to do next time you're here? i want to have a contest to see who knows your lyrics better, me or you. [ laughter ] all right? will you do it? i crushed huey louis in this, and i feel i will crush you. >> i was going to say, one of the hardest things in the world is -- it happens. you walk out on stage, and i know the second verse to "penny lover." why can't i sing it? [ laughter ]

you follow me? >> jimmy: yeah, yeah. >> i've learned a new trick now which is fabulous which goes," come on now! everybody, yeah!" >> jimmy: lionel richie, everybody. "american idol" returns march 9th. special preview following the oscars sunday here on abc. lionel richie. we'll be back with kelly ripa and mark consuelos! imagine being good to go without daily hiv pills. ♪ good to go binge-watch. ♪ good to go out even later. ♪ with cabenuva, there's no pausing for daily hiv pills. for adults who are undetectable, cabenuva is the only complete, long-acting hiv treatment you can get every other month. it's two injections from a healthcare provider, as few as 6 times a year. don't take cabenuva if you're allergic to its ingredients, or taking certain medicines, that may interact.

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>> jimmy: hi, there, welcome back. music from aloe blacc is on the way. our next guests are both married, on tv, and in real life too. monday, they wake up very early to host their annual, post-academy awards spectacular. watch “live! with kelly & mark after the oscars” from the dolby theater. say hello to kelly ripa and mark consuelos. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> jimmy: did you color

coordinate? or was this a coincidence? >> we realized backstage that we look like two magicians. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: oh, yeah. >> we realized we also look like lionel richie. [ laughter ] we all got the memo to wear elegant, sleek black tonight. >> jimmy: you are here for the oscars. >> yeah. >> jimmy: it is time to get dressed up and go to the parties and do all that stuff. i want to talk about that in a minute, but i want to ask you, first of all, how long has it been now that, mark, you've been the official cohost? >> cohost? it's almost two years. next month, it will be two years, yeah. [ applause ] >> jimmy: as your therapist, how is it going? [ laughter ] is it affecting you positively? your relationship personally? >> we need two couches. [ laughter ] we actually need two couches to lay down. i think it's been great. >> okay. >> we don't really talk about work at home. >> ever. >> ever. >> jimmy: never, ever? >> no because we were there. >> jimmy: right, okay. >> so we don't have to fill each other in. >> jimmy: gotcha. >> we already know what happened and how bad or good it was. >> jimmy: uh-huh? >> and it's never really that

bad or good. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: you usually find yourself kind of this the middle, right? >> yeah, when we do talk about it, we often forget who was on the show that day. >> jimmy: uh-huh? >> somebody will ask us, "who did you have on that day?" "i don't know." >> jimmy: i do the same thing. >> it's amnesia. >> jimmy: it's terrible, it's embarrassing. "who was on tonight?" "hold on a second." >> you think we're kidding, you're not kidding. you try it -- i don't know what it is. it's like amnesia. it allows you to continue on with the rest of your career doing this. >> jimmy: it's a good thing we aren't doctors. [ laughter ] >> oh, my gosh, we would be the worst doctors. >> jimmy: so last week you guys -- this is the reason i ask this question. you guys on wednesday of last week had a moment that i think is among the great television moments. >> we did? >> jimmy: you did. and i would like to share that with the audience. >> okay. >> she got this burst of energy, maybe. >> hm. >> why? why are you looking at me?

>> no, i'm just -- i think it's a cool concept. >> i think you just drifted off. because i've been married to you long enough to know when you're not listening to me. and you are thinking about -- you've moved on, and i'm trying to think about what it is you could possibly be thinking about. >> i'm wondering where to go to lunch later on. she get the chicken breast or not the salmon? >> do you understand that i know him so well it's like, he's not even listening. [ cheers and applause ] >> that was a lot. and it actually happens a lot more than you'd think. >> you know, as a husband, sometimes you just -- you know, you wait for those cue words. like "please." "help." i was having a moment, i was literally thinking about lunch. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: is this something that happens at home a lot too? >> 100%. >> yeah. >> i mean, that moment at home

is 99% of the conversation. >> jimmy: right, right, right. but when it spills over to the air, perhaps you have a problem. >> that's where i draw the line. at least pretend you're paying attention to me on air. [ laughter ] from 9:00 until 10:00. it's not that hard. [ laughter and applause ] >> sometimes i take a little nap. i take a little nap during the show. >> he'll say to me, "i just zoned out." i'm like, "yeah, no [ bleep ]." [ laughter ] >> jimmy: i really like that. you should do that more times, i think. i think it should become a regular thing. >> i'm sure it's going to happen. >> jimmy: monday morning has got to be -- can i just say -- i've seen you guys do this. i've been on this show with you many, many times. it seems like an absolute nightmare. you have to stay up so late at the oscars, then you get up so early. and you are crammed backstage. >> it is wild. >> jimmy: describe what it looks like backstage. >> picture jimmy's desk cut in half, then picture eight people

standing there. trying to interview jennifer lopez. it is wild. >> they have just won an oscar, so they're not there either. they're somewhere else. >> jimmy: yeah, they're where you on the cliff. [ laughter ] [ applause ] and it's like you bought, like, the smallest booth at a trade show. >> yeah, the smallest booth. >> jimmy: jammed into a little -- >> the saddest booth at a trade show. >> the saddest booth at a trade show, and yet we are the first people people make eye contact with after they've won an academy award. so they are sort of trapped there. they're stuck there. we do have to kill it backstage so it makes it less problematic for people to talk to us. they're like, okay, if i can get a bottle of tequila, we will talk to you. >> jimmy: guillermo just woke up, by the way. [ laughter ] tequila. >> i fascinate men all over. >> jimmy: at the oscars, can you see the show, can you hear what's going on? >> no, it's like the worst place to see the oscars. they've got like a small, really

old flatscreen tv. the volume's low because they can't -- if it's too loud -- >> we can't have volume. and then, like mark said, the monitor is about the size of your average -- like a kitchen television. >> jimmy: a tiny little television you're watching, yeah. >> then a bunch of executives are standing in front of it, so we're trying to sort of see beyond them to watch the show. and we miss everything. do you remember the famous -- you were there, la la land, we call it the la la land of the academies. >> jimmy: of course, they screwed up the envelope. >> we knew before everyone else that something had gone horribly wrong. we didn't know what. >> jimmy: you did? >> we just saw people running, screaming into headsets, and running backstage. and we started packing up, because i was like, guys, whatever's going on right now, we need to evacuate this building. [ laughter ]

>> jimmy: really? i didn't know that. >> oh, my god. you missed all the excitement because, let me say, you must feel so relieved that you don't have to host on sunday. >> jimmy: well, yeah. i mean, yeah, of course. this is conan's problem now. [ laughter ] i feel very -- >> i actually feel you look younger. >> jimmy: i'm also realizing, when i came back, you're always very nice, "what a great job you did hosting the show." you didn't really see any of it. [ laughter ] [ applause ] >> we get to see your monologue. >> jimmy: oh, you did that. >> saw the monologue. >> we get to see your monologue. you know what you should do? come back and hang out. >> jimmy: just hang out? >> really feel the excitement of silting there and -- >> jimmy: missing the whole show? >> missing the entire show. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: i'm going to watch it at home and call you the next day. >> call me and let me know. >> jimmy: kelly ripa and mark consuelos. [ cheers and applause ] “live! with kelly and mark after the oscars show” airs this monday morning.

we'll be back with aloe blacc! with the way that pg&e handled the wildfires. yeah. yeah. i totally, totally understand. we're adding a ton of sensors. as soon as something comes in contact with the power line, it'll turn off so that there's not a risk that it's gonna fall to the ground and start a fire. okay.

and i want you to be able to feel the improvements. we've been able to reduce wildfire risk from our equipment by over 90%. that's something i want to believe. [skateboard sounds] >> jimmy: thanks to lionel richie, thanks to kelly and mark. apologies to matt damon.

"nightline" is next, but first, this is his album "stand together." here with the song "one good thing," aloe blacc! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ what does it take to move a mountain that no one wants to climb ♪ ♪ when they tell you there's no answer how do you change their heart and mind ♪ ♪ can you face the road to freedom when the past is in your way ♪ ♪ in the darkness of the night the future may be hard to find ♪ ♪ but i believe that there's a day all it takes is one good thing ♪ ♪ all we need

is one good thing and i will find one good thing ♪ ♪ 'cause all it takes is one good thing one good thing i've been deep in ♪ ♪ troubled water drowning in a foolish pride if i could get through ♪ ♪ to the author what are the words to change the tide the hardest thing ♪ ♪ a man can do is see another point of view and mend a broken history ♪ ♪ to make it something new and all it takes is one good things ♪

♪ all we need is one good thing and i will find ♪ ♪ one good thing 'cause all it takes is one good thing ♪ ♪ do you believe in what you see or do you dream of ♪ ♪ what could be 'cause i believe in you and me ♪ ♪ and we could be the one good thing ladies and gentlemen ♪ the architects of our independence were absolutely board of director when they proclaimed, we find these truths to be self-evident, that all human beings were created equal regardless of your color, creed,

or nationality. and they were endowed by the creator with certain unalienable rights. among these are life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness. so if you believe in dock one good thing for your neighbor, say it with me. if you believe in doing one good thing for your community, say it with me. we all have the ability to do one good 9. ♪ one good thing ♪ will you join me and do -- ♪ one good thing ♪ [ cheers and applause ] tonight, t