that can help remove some cholesterol, and that's heart healthy. [ dad ] jan? ♪ bottled at the mountain source. crystal geyser. crystal geyser.

crystal geyser. then we deliver it directly to you. today, get ready for a sexy surprise. >> mind if i try these on? >> ellen is giving josh duhamel a gift from the heart. >> how are you feeling in that? ok. >> plus... alicia keys, bethenny frankel and a viewer in need the gets love. >> if you like surprises i think you will like this. >> find out what the real surprise is today on "ellen." [applause] [cheering] [♪] ♪have a little fun today >> here she is now, ellen degeneres! [applause] [cheering] [♪]

[cheering] >> ellen: thank you very much. thank you. that is so nice of you. i appreciate it like crazy and i give it all back to you. thank you so much, everybody! [applause] [cheering] i am glad you are here. i am glad you are excited. and i love the fact that you're here and you are carefree not a care in the world you are having fun. and i appreciate it. and i don't want to say or do anything to change that. but there is a giant asteroid hurdling towards earth. [laughter] have you heard about this? yes, well, ok, there's one. there's an asteroid the size of

a football field and today it will fly by earth closer than it has any asteroid ever has ever flown by, ever. [laughter] experts continue to have fun. but experts say that it has no chance of hitting the earth. that is what the experts say. and these are the same experts who cannot agree which toothpaste is best at whitening your teeth. but it will miss earth by 15 minutes they can predict that. i don't know how they figure that out. they can predict the earth's orbit down to the minute yet my cable guy gives me a four-hour window and cannot show up on time. the worst thing that can happen is it can hit a satellite and knockout our cellphone service. which means you will not be able to answer your phone when your mother calls and which she will panic and assume the asteroid will hit you. how do you prepare for something like that?

i have a flashlight app on my iphone. i don't know if that is enough. or i could get behind ryan gosling's abs, maybe? they look like they could take everything. and if they don't work, you go out happy. sometimes things happen. have you been driving and you see the signs that says "falling rocks" what are we supposed to do with that. rocks that have fallen and you are driving. shouldn't they have put that say way, way up ahead so you can turn around? and why do they put it under a road under the falling rocks in the first place? someone should have thought that through. what about the signs that say "65-miles-per-hour" those are jokes, right? a lot of things in life that you cannot be prepared for. but i think y'all are prepared for this right now. it's time to dance. [cheering]

[♪] [rhythmic clapping] [applause] [cheering] >> ellen: tony. >> yes? >> ellen: do you know what to do

if an asteroid is hurdling towards me? >> not a clue. >> ellen: you jump in front of me and protect me. that is what i pay you for. if my covergirl looks go we are doomed. and a few weeks ago we started something... [applause] [cheering] >> ellen: closer than i thought. >> wow. that was close. >> ellen: where were you, tony? >> i was just about to move. >> ellen: everybody is ok, right? good. how about that special effects guy that had the string attached with the fake asteroid is he ok too? are you all right? [applause] [laughter] what was the smoke that was coming with it? as i was saying we are looking

for the next covergirl and the winner will receive $20,000 and an ad in "people" magazine. and here is one of the entries here. this comes from debra west. ellen i hope it's ok if i nominate my daughter anna. i admire her positive outlook she was born with spina bifida and doctors told me if she lived she would not walk. she has proved them wrong and taught me so much about life. and here is a photo of anna laura. beautiful. [applause] that is what we are talking about. that is who we are looking for. someone strong and confident and beautiful inside and out. and one more letter that i want to talk about. i love your show and everything you do. you always make me laugh and the music gets me dancing. i think i have what it takes to be the next covergirl please pick me. here is a photo. [laughter] [applause]

>> wow! >> ellen: you are not eligible. [laughter] no matter how pretty you are, are you not eligible. >> looking like that i don't think i should be, either. [laughter] >> ellen: i remember that day. it was really windy. [laughter] if you think you've got what it takes to be a covergirl go to our website. today is friday, the final day of kick in the kindness week. [♪] ♪what i like about you ♪you hold me tight [♪]

>> ellen: that is enough. thank you. we have saved our biggest surprise for last. jeanie is outside of karma salon in pennsylvania and we are surprising velda. velda, i love this woman. she is 60 years old she was in our audience three months ago and that is her dancing. dancing it was her first vacation in 10 years and she sent us an e-mail about her experience in the show and we wanted to learn more about her. i love her. here is what we learned. velda could use kindness she is caring for her elderly father and lost her full-time job and is struggling to pay her bills and still has an amazing attitude. we wanted to rock her world. jeanie, are you there? >> hi, i'm here. >> ellen: hi, jeanie. >> hi. >> we are going to skype with

velda. and we were going to see her reaction. she cannot see us. we can see her when i say go, i will pop-up on her computer she has no idea. ready? go. velda. hi velda. hi. how's it going? [screaming] [applause] velda? how's it going? >> hi, ellen. >> ellen: hi everybody in karma salon. i like the t-shirt you are wearing! i'm good how are you. tell me about your t-shirt. >> oh, my goodness. this is from ellen. you have to make more sexy ones for ladies of 60. can you see it? >> ellen: yes, i can. i love it and it is a great

idea. >> and i have the black one too from season 10. but you have to do it like this for ladies who want to be sexy like portia. [applause] i could not get your name first. >> ellen: that is all right. you came up with it your name should be first. [screaming] velda, i heard there were two things that keep you going. tell me what they are. >> vodka and you. >> ellen: vodka and me. >> ellen, you make me drink! [laughter] [screaming] >> ellen: i think vodka makes everybody dance. listen, do you like when i surprise people? >> i love it when you surprise. ellen, i think you are the most humanitarian sweetest lady in the world. you do so much for so many

people. [applause] [cheering] >> ellen: thank you. velda, if you like surprises, i think you are like this. jeanie? >> hello. [screaming] [applause] >> i don't know what to say. >> ellen: hold on i got one more thing for you that is going to make you very happy. bring it in. >> a stripper? [laughter] [cheering]

>> ellen: the joy! [applause] >> thank you, ellen! >> ellen: it was the vodka not the guy. i sent you the vodka not the guy. all right. >> oh, my god. what do i do? >> you drink. >> ellen: you start drinking. i will check in with you in a minute. everybody enjoy. here is what is going to happen. i will freak velda's freak and she doesn't know there's something else that is in that cart that is going to change her life. i will do that later in the show. and i can't waitment i love that woman. so we will be back. [applause] [cheering] [♪] >> i'm going to kick you into kindness real hard right now, all right? [cheering] >> i bought her a nice gift,

earrings and took her to dinner and made sweet, sweet love. [cheering] >> the next "ellen"... >> let's talk about that right there. were you opening a jar of pickles? >> with matthew fox and an astounding magician. >> i will make the deck into a brush. >> ellen: i don't understand what happened. >> and ellen's heart is pounding. haunted hallway. >> gosh you are so scary. >> ellen: we couldn't really tell.

[applause] [cheering] [♪] >> ellen: i hope nobody is getting a haircut later in that salon. everybody is drunk. our first guest is one of our favorites and not just because he rips his clothes off but mostly because of that.

his movie "safe haven" is in theaters now, check it out. >> i wasn't sure about the yellow but it looks pretty good. >> thanks to your primer and lexie's keen eye it worked out. >> your walls need a little bit... [laughter] >> are you ok? i'm sorry i'm laughing? are you ok? >> i have the hammer in my truck, i can -- it will take me two minutes. [applause] >> ellen: welcome the very handsome, josh duhamel! [cheering] [applause] [♪] >> how are you? how are you. >> ellen: i'm good, how are you?

>> i'm doing great. [cheering] >> this is why i love coming here. it's good for myself esteem. >> ellen: like you don't get this everywhere you go. that is not true you are handsome and charming and i love you in every way. i love your personality, you are a kind man, you are easy on the eyes. all of it is all good. >> thank you. [cheering] i'm waiting for a punchline. >> ellen: there is no punchline. i mean that. >> i appreciate it. >> ellen: and happy belated birthday to you. you just turned 40, right? >> yes. yes. i just turned 4o my wife througw me a party of all parties. it was a slow-developing surprise party over the course of three days. it started with my friend picking me up at my house and

saying bring your helmut and your golf clubs. >> ellen: you have a helmut? >> i have a bike helmut like a minnesota vikings football helmut. i didn't know. i brought it and i did not need it. but then i get in the car and we start heading north. and along the pch, my sister is along the road hitchhiking. [laughter] i'm like? so we stopped and picked her up. go to the golf course two hours away. and we are about to tee off and two friends show up from back home they live in minneapolis. and throughout the rest of the weekend it was my dad and all my old friends and people i worked with. i mean it was ice sculptures and bands and taco stands. >> ellen: wow. that is fantastic. [applause] and crazy glasses. >> look at that. that is my dad on the left. and that is me singing bon jovi.

>> ellen: that is fantastic. >> that is me with four shots of tequila, by the way. i literally drank my weight in tequila over the weekend. >> ellen: but you remember the details i'm impressed. and valentine's day did you do something special? >> valentine's day was great. we you know, i bought her a nice gift, bought her earrings and took her to dinner and made, sweet, sweet love. >> ellen: did you? [laughter] [cheering] [applause] >> ellen: what time around was that? [laughter] >> well, anywhere between 9 and 2:00 a.m.. >> ellen: i see. >> valentine's day you have to bring out your best stuff. >> ellen: and she said she surprises you with naughty thing. you know what i'm talking about? >> yeah, yeah, yeah. we do a lot of dressing up.

>> ellen: that is why i thought i would give you something to surprise her. >> i like that. [applause] mind if i try these on. >> ellen: see if they fit. [cheering] [screaming] >> that might cover it all up. [laughter] >> ellen: i know it is a day late but anyway there it is. >> thank you. >> ellen: listen let's talk about the movie, "safe haven". you and julianne, i loved the movie. i loved the two of you. how are you feeling in that? ok? [laughter] >> i have a heart on. [applause] [laughter] >> ellen: i said that in the meeting this morning. i actually said that in the

meeting and that is going to be awkward and andy could not stop laughing. all right. and you said it. all right. so now we know that. and so... let's talk about the movie. >> yes, please. >> ellen: you and julianne are fantastic together, individually, everything about it, i loved the movie and i loved the two of you in it and together and you hit it off very well. >> well, first of all thank you for saying that i appreciate it. yeah, it was you know, we just finished it this summer. it's fresh in my mind still. and it is a movie i'm very proud of. >> ellen: it is a great movie i really recommend it. >> thank you. >> ellen: you're welcome. should we take a break? we will talk about nickelodeon because you are hosting the kids' choice awards. and you got slimed. [applause] when we come back, we are going to give someone in the audience

a chance to win tickets to see the kids' choice awards and play a game. we will be back. [applause] [cheering] [♪] >> what is the third planet from the sun? >> i forgot. ♪this girl is on fire ♪this girl is on fire

[♪] [applause] [cheering] >> ellen: that josh duhamel and he will be hosting the kids' choice awards next month. you have been slimed before? >> yes, a couple times. >> ellen: what does it feel like? >> it's really fun. it's not as stinky or taste as bad as it might look.

it takes a little bit to wash off. >> ellen: i look forward to it and we will give a lucky audience member a chance to win tickets to the kids' choice awards. where is alish sha? [applause] [cheering] >> hi. hi. have you seen the kids' choice awards? >> a few times. >> ellen: here is how it's going to work. will you put on a poncho. all right. so far this doesn't look good, does it? all right. and then the helmut goes on. are you getting nervous? >> i'm scared. >> ellen: yeah, you should be. all right there is a spike on top of that helmut and you will stand here in this pool. and you will be right under --

stand on this. ok. and stay right on that exactly. josh and i will ask you a series of questions about kids' choice related to kids' choice awards. each time you will get one wrong, the balloon is going to drop lower and close to your head if you answer correctly you can avoid being slimed and you will win the tickets. all right? ready? here we go. [laughter] "american idol" is nominated for favorite reality show. who sings "born in the u.s.a." >> me. >> it's not starting out well. >> ellen: that is bruce spring steispringsteen. >> do you want to take your shirt off? you might get slimed, too. [screaming] [applause]

>> my nipples are a little higher. [laughter] >> ellen: they are very high. i mean he should take his shirt off. ok. >> taylor swift might win for thor racks. what is another word that means swift? >> taylor. [laughter] >> ellen: you know what swift means like quick or fast. that would have been the answer. ok. a little closer. all right. >> sisters venus and serena williams are both up for favorite female athlete. what is the third planet from the sun? >> i forgot. um... earth.

>> ellen: all right. >> i know, i said it. [laughter] [applause] >> yes! that is great. somebody get her -- >> ellen: show the back of your shirt right now. [applause] all right. you are not going home empty handed you will go see the kids' choice awards. and we will get her a towel. "safe haven" is in theaters. go see it. it's really good. josh duhamel, everybody. [applause] [cheering] >> crazy hit the wall and bryn says go, mommy go. disney is my bitch now. i will kick you into kindness real hard right now, all