♪ i heard this boom! and then ba, ba. and then when the door nobody started turning, it was just like a horror film. my life hasn't been the same ever since. >> i'm standing in the hallway of columbine high school where 15 years later one shooting survivor begins a remarkable journey of healing and understanding. it will force him to confront his deepest fears as he visits other school shooting sites around the country. >> we aren't alone. we're not as isolated as we sometimes think. >> to help heal the hurt he set out to meet other shooting survivors, sharing what they had lost. >> you are a victim when you

have symptom, and they're going to hurt. >> celebrating what they had found. >> i am who i am because of this, but i can't be the girl who got shot for the rest of my life. >> doing together what they couldn't do alone. >> it's a gift that we were given. i feel completely changed. sam is the kind of guy you'd be happy to call your friend. he's a 32-year-old filmmaker, lives in denver, loves his girlfriend sarah, loves his dog rocco, has been known to make his own beer from time to time. he loves his job as a camera assistant on commercial shoots, sometimes. sam likes silly clothes. he's got some silly moves. the man's got silly tattoos, too.

one says silly hats only. he's an advanced hula ho-hoophu. he's known at ponder monster. he leaves little paintings around town. he calls himself a professional dream chaser. that's sam. for around 11 months out of every year. but then april rolls around. >> there's a particular smell in the air, it's like very sweet, you know. everything starts blossoming. it's a time when everything starts coming to life. and really all i can think about is death. >> sam, you see, is a graduate of columbine high school. and he was there on april 20, 1999, 15 years ago today. >> a mass shooting at an american school, this time a high school in suburban denver. at least two young men dressed in black trench coats entered the school and randomly opened fire.

>> how do you see the anniversary? do you see it as a day? or a set of weeks? >> it's kind of like a time period. january goes by, february goes by, and then i start to get the feeling around march. >> and then you fall off a cliff? >> yeah. pretty much. it's more like hitting a brick wall, emotionally. and you can see it coming from a mile away. and it's that anticipation of april is that wall coming. >> every year sam hopes he can break the cycle, but so far he has failed to come to terms with that tragic day. sam was a 17 year old junior then. he was sitting in the cafeteria, studying for a test when the shooting began, and soon found himself trapped in a room with 17 other people, hiding from the shooters. >> i heard this boom. and it still didn't really

connect. and then i heard a couple more, like ba, ba. and then i scramble around the corner and into the kitchen. and when i get back there, there's a woman cafeteria worker pulling a door open. the room is packed with people. and i turn around, i close the door. and naturally, you're going to want to lock the door. so i look at this handle, and there's no lock at all. we could hear the voices and the explosions and gunshots getting closer and closer. >> the memories. they have haunted sam to this day. >> some people might have the notion that, you know, it's been ten years, it's been 15 years. why aren't you over it already. and it doesn't really work like that. these memories are just as powerful as physical scars. >> no one can understand sam's inner struggle better than his columbine classmates and his principal, frank deangeles.

>> sam is still processing what has happened and still having some difficulties. is it common? are you all still finding the same thing? >> sometimes you feel great, and you almost think that everything's in the past. and then one little thing can come along and you're right back to where you were 15 years ago. >> i went to college right afterwards and they did a fire drill. it's a fire drill. all of a sudden i froiz and tears started streaming down my face. i couldn't understand it. i doesn't move. >> do you have to have been physically wounded to still be traumatized 15 years later? >> absolutely not. >> everybody who was part of columbine high school experienced grief. this past week i'm getting phone calls from parents and students from 1999. can you talk to my son? he's been in and out of substance abuse. >> there's thouno bleeding.

>> you can't see it. >> i think that's the problem. culture does move on so quickly that they think oh, you're fine. you look fine on the outside. everything appears to be fine. >> it's been 15 years. >> the whole world watched while i was trapped in that room. >> what was required, sam decided, was a collective cry claiming we are not fine. >> my life hasn't been the same ever since. >> so several years ago he started interviewing several other survivors for a film project he called columbine, wounded minds. >> this documentary is about finding counseling for those who still need it, like myself. >> i'm getting the impression that what you're hoping to do is tapping into the network of other survivors, find your counseling there. >> yeah. i've found a lot of answers with every single person that i've talked to. >> the most personal of answers,

though, has eluded sam. what to do about april. but he hopes that this year he's found a way. a ten-day journey to share experiences with other survivors. that with dateline's help will take him to west side middle school in jonesboro, arkansas. red lake high in red lake, minnesota. northern illinois university in de kalb, illinois and blacksburg, virginia. all places that were touched by the same senseless violence as columbine, which is where sam plans to return at the end of his journey to finally confront some long-held fears. >> i was hoping to find and learn new tools for the life-long healing process and be able to bring them home and share them with some of my friends. >> but it's a risky trip, especially for a person with as much emotional baggage as sam. >> that's a really scary thing

for you to confront yourself with and say that it's okay to put yourself through it. coming up. opening a door to sam's past that just won't stay shut. >> i remember laying on my back wondering if this was it. >> and sam takes a big step toward healing. >> i don't care if you were shot or not. you've suffered. >> thank you for that. i have nothing to do except be me. tonight i am not mom. i am paula. so dad, what does that make you? dad. ♪

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♪ it's five weeks before the 15th anniversary of columbine. this is the about the time every year when survivor, sam, starts feeling anxious and depressed. but this year he's decided to do something about it. a cross-country trip to meet the survivors of other school shootings in the locations where their misfortune took place. sam will travel alone, but i will join him in between stops to see how he's holding up. i look at your itinerary, jonesboro, arkansas, virginia tech, northern illinois, red lake, minnesota. that's a scary journey and can open up a lot of pain. >> yeah, because i didn't know what it would be like to completely submerge myself in just the whole idea of school shootings and violence.

just completely 24 hours a day every day. >> sam knows he could be thrown back into his nightmares, back to that room in the cafeteria kitchen, back into that moment when he heard the shooters approaching. >> i, i put my toes at the bottom of the door, and i didn't really feel like standing up, so i sat on the ground, wedged my toes under the door. and when the doorknob started turning it was like a horror film with the door newspaper turning slowly and the door slowly opening, and i remember laying on my back wondering if this was it. there were no more safety nets between life and death. ♪ hello my old heart, how have you been ♪ ♪ are you still there inside my chest ♪ ♪ been so worried

♪ you've been so still ♪ barely beating at all >> driving into jonesboro, arkansas right now. and there was a middle school shooting here in 1998, which was a year before columbine happened in march. >> a terrible and tragic school shooting in jonesboro, arkansas, middle school youngsters were apparently tricked from leaving their classrooms to the outdoors where they were ambushed from shooters in the woods. >> this is the first time i've ever stepped foot on the location of another school shooting. so i'm going to meet debbie and lynette. they were both teachers at west side middle school who were there during the day of the shooting. >> hi. >> hi. >> just being able to be around somebody who understands can do amazing things for your

emotions, for the way you feel. >> we happened the year before, so you would have been a sophomore. >> did you even hear about us? >> i did. i did. but, you know, it just, it didn't stick, i don't know. >> i think, i think, when it hasn't happened to you yet you don't notice as much. then after it happens you notice everything that happens. >> everything. >> on that march 24th, 16 years ago, debbie spencer witnessed several of her students die. lynette was critically injured. they knew the students who did the shooting. >> did you know the shooters? >> i knew dillen. i grew up with him, even though he was a year older than me. >> a year's not that much. >> we went to day care together. his older brother was friends with my older brother. he was on my friend's baseball team.

it's strange when you know them personally. >> yeah. we taught both the boys. >> friends killing friends doesn't make sense. >> not much does anymore sam tells the teachers, not just to him, but to many of his columbine classmates. >> you know, i've seen my friends. they go through all this horrible stuff and then just close themself off. >> and that's the worst thing they can do. >> and i know people who have done that. >> i remember when the doctors told me, one of them said you are severely clinically depressed and i started crying and said no, i'm not, and i thought, yeah, you must be or you wouldn't be crying like this. and that's when i south help from a counselor. >> but once march rolls around and the anniversary is near, all that therapy isn't enough to keep the memories from returning. debbie once even tried leaving the country with her daughter for the anniversary. it didn't work. >> i have always wanted to go to paris. always.

it was march 24, the day that we, the first day we were there. and i just falled and cried. i said i'm this far away, why can't i just forget for a little bit. but it was just overwhelming the emotions that i had while i was there. >> so what are the greatest tools you have to get through the moments? >> i said it's okay. i think that's what i learned the most, what i'm feeling is normal. it's okay. >> one of the things that has helped lynette is forgiveness. she's even visited one of the shooters' mothers. >> i'd go to her house, and she'd say he's just right over there. the prison was very close to their home. she was just devastated. so we just held hands and circled and prayed together. that's what you do is forgive others if you want to be forgiven. >> i haven't really forgiven, but what i say is they're not worth thinking about. so i don't worry about it.

i decided one day i've been a victim long enough. they've taken all this from me. they're not taking anything else. >> because they had been minors when they committed the crime both shooters were released from prison when they were 21 years old. >> our shooters are still alive, and we would love to have answers, but i think it's like they don't really know why they did what they did. >> sam and the teachers talked for hours. and somewhere during the conversation sam starts getting this feeling, familiar, because he's felt it before, that somehow he doesn't belong here. >> sometimes i feel like i didn't go through enough to be able to talk to -- >> yes, you did. >> i know, but -- >> you did. and i don't care if you were shot or not, you were injured. you were a victim. and you have symptoms. and they're going to hurt. i don't think you should ever let anybody minimize that.

that is, you know, you've suffered. >> thank you for that. tell you that you're not a victim, because you are. >> that meant so much to me when she reached out and said that i was just as equally hurt as her, who, you know, and she had been shot. >> is that part of what you were looking for, was some sort of sense of validation that what this is really all about is entirely real? >> yeah. debbie and lynette, they really showed me that we're all in this together, and that part was incredib incredible. >> sam will need his newfound confidence. his journey will only get harder. coming up, a shared battle for survival. >> so you went out to newtown? >> yeah. we drove across. >> just got goose bumps. >> when dateline continues.

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♪ as he travels across the country, visiting other survivors, sam is keeping a video diary.

>> it was a little bit surreal. it feels like sort of breaking through the walls of a movie into reality. and all of a sudden it's there in front of your face. >> he reflects on his jonesboro visit. >> to me, that was two terrors in one day. >> his most difficult moment standing with debbie and lynette in the courtyard where children and a teacher were lost. >> i'm surprised they didn't kill more than what they did. it was just pop, pop, pop, pop, pop. >> as we went outside, it started to get to me a little bit. you could get the feeling of the complete terror that they must have gone through. ♪ oh, don't leave me here alone ♪ ♪ oh, i don't want to be alone

♪ i want to find a home ♪ i want to share it with you >>right now i'm driving into red lake, minnesota which is an indian reservation. i'm going to meet up with justin jordain. >> this community is in shock asking how could someone so young turn so violent and leave so many families grieving the loss of a loved one. thanks for meeting us here. >> the classrooms at red lake high where some of the shooting he tells sam he hid in a nearby office together with about 20 other students. >> when the shot happened, we heard somebody stepping through glass and it breaking and getting closer.

he comes to the door. first thing i did was grab onto the handle. me and the superintendent at the time we grand onto the handle. >> speechless. i don't know what to say. that's crazy. >> did you believe he also was holding the door during the shooting? >> i had no idea, you know, i wanted to scream out and be like, hey, i, i also held the door shut. i knew deep down that it was a really good bonding moment between the two of us. >> justin, a tribal police officer now, is a man of few words. instead, he's a man of action as he showed in the wake of a 2012 shooting at sandy hook elementary school in newtown, connecticut. >> so you went out to newtown? >> yeah. we drove across. took me three days to get everything organized and to get all the people together that wanted to come. and we just took off and left.

>> justin and his delegation brought sandy hook this dream catcher as a show of support. the gift was more than a symbol. it had been given to the red lake community seven years before from a group of students at columbine. today he was paying that gift forward with a special message from red ling. >> may this dream catcher never have to travel again i believe is what it said on it. >> just got goose bumps. >> it was a healing thing. just, when you go out there, let them know that we know what they're feeling like. >> mm-hm. >> it helped us, too, by, i mean, dealing with what we went through. >> flare is a word inscribed above the door of the room sam and justin met in. >> i noticed this, how do you say that? >> ogichidag. it means warrior.

>> i saw justin as this silent warrior, whose presence was so powerful being here with me goes such a long way to step forward in a community that doesn't really open up a whole lot. >> courage. sam will need it at another stop. northern illinois university. >> i tried to help them. and then i fell apart. >> lucky for sam, he'll have a shoulder to cry on and plenty of advice from a man named joe. coming up, how sam was touched by violence yet again, just a few miles from home. >> my friend got on the phone and you could just sort of see it in his face --

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♪ we're not alone. and we aren't as isolated as we >> we're on the road with sam as he tries to make sense of his journey so far. >> you say not alone, but you're also not forgotten. people talk about columbine. they talk about virginia tech. they don't often talk about red lake, minnesota. >> we don't remember all of the shootings, unfortunately, for a number of reasons. and one of them being that there are just so many. >> in the aftermath of each school shooting, one question inevitably takes center stage. would stricter gun laws make a difference. sam is thankful the issue hasn't come up in any of his conversations so far. >> there's no one answer. every shooting and every situation is so unique of how it's cultivated, how it happened. it's its own fingerprint.

there are things that could prevent it, but it didn't happen. it just feels like if someone wants to do something they will. which is scary. i mean, people will always find a way. it's just how we deal with it afterwards. >> and the story of how one man has dealt with his suffering is what brings sam to de kalb, illinois. >> i'm going to meet j joe deboughski who lost his daughter. >> the bulletin came today from the campus of northern illinois university, a big school about an hour due west of chicago. a young man had fired a gun at students in a lecture hall. >> as part of his healing process, jdee sided to go back to school and get a marriage and grief counseling degree at the same university where his

daughter was killed. >> hey, joe. >> sam, welcome to de kalb. >> she was so unassuming, wondering how can i make a difference in the world for god. >> yeah. >> and for people's lives and everything. >> do you come here to reflect? or is it, or is it just nice to know that it's there? >> occasionally. occasionally. it's kind of a remembrance that it's real, you know. just sometimes it just hard to, hard to believe that, okay. i'm really here. this has really happened. >> sam understands exactly what joe is talking about. for years after columbine he was in denial, believing he could return to the life he had before the shooting. that optimistic 17-year-old boy innocent and safe without the memory of violence or trauma. but how could he?

come april, this wish for a normal life inevitably gave way to the nightmares of that life and death struggle to keep the shooters out of that room. >> and the door opened about that much. and there was just a little bit more of a struggle, and then it was gone. you know, we did everything we could to keep the door shut, and they never got it open. >> an s.w.a.t. team finally freed sam and his classmates three and a half hours later. he would never return to that room again. >> when i stepped outside of the school right in front of my feet was a dead body. and, you know, your mind does a lot of things to try and protect you from getting damaged, and i think it just stopped at that point. >> sam soon realized he had lost

several good friends that day. but he kept his pain hidden for a very long time. >> took me ten years to realize that i was ready to open up and to try and get something out of the things that were going on inside me. >> mm-hm. >> and by then, everyone had disappeared. have you experienced anything like that? or -- >> yes, you just need to be proactive about letting people, reminding people that you're there. >> right. >> and you need help. >> you know, i find it really interesting now that i'm sitting with someone who is exactly like someone that i would want to talk to, because you understand, and if i say something, you can respond and relate and, like, that's what i'm looking for. >> and then sam tells joe a story he told few people before, about another loss. not at columbine, but more than 13 years later at the movie

theater shooting in aurora, colorado. sam lives just 20 minutes from the theater. and in the hours after the shooting, he realized that an acquaintance that was close to some of his best friends was possibly among the 12 victims who had been killed. he joined his friends as they waited for news in the apartment. if it was bad, sam knew they'd need a lot of emotional support. >> i was like, there's got to be a way i can help. i know what they're going through. and i knew, and i think they knew, too, that we were just sort of waiting around for the worst phone call ever. >> the call, when it came, was devastating. >> and, yeah. my friend got on the phone and you could just sort of see it in his face, what he was being told.

and he hangs up the phone. he looks at me, and he just shakes his head. and i, i lost it. >> violence had touched you again. >> yeah. and then i felt like i needed more help than any of them. there's, there's just like nothing i can do. and i hate that i can't, i wasn't able to be there the way i thought i was able to be there for them. >> think of how when you're flying on an airplane, they tell you if the oxygen masks drop from the, put yours on first and then help your children and those who are unable to help themselves. kind of that way. >> that's a good way to put it. >> yeah. >> take care of yourself first. >> yeah. >> so you can be of use to other

people. >> exactly. >> i learned something that i could have never expected, and it was so, and it's so simple. >> but it makes so much sense, doesn't it? >> it does, being able to open up to him and get sort of the feedback that i've always been looking for was really incredible. >> but back in his hotel room, sam's mood is not as positive. being that vulnerable time and time again on this journey is taking its toll. >> this trip completely worn me down, made me sick. i have a cold. it's torn up my insides. god, this is so degrading. this is non-stop intensity. >> but there is someone who sam hopes can help ease his anxiety. >> oh, yeah, there she is. >> can this emotional reunion help him face his biggest fear?

coming up, two survivors doing together what they couldn't do alone. >> we took a picture, and she said that was by far the happiest i've ever been in a picture in front of norris hall. >> when dateline continues. yeah. what's the... guest room situation? the "name your price" tool, making the world a little more progressive. mom has a headache! had a headache! but now, i& don't. excedrin is fast. in fact for some, relief starts in just 15 minutes. excedrin. headache. gone. it's on.

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♪ i'm so grateful to have met

you and for our time together. >> likewise. >> ah, god bless you in your journey here. >> thank you, sir. >> joe's words have had a big impact on sam. and as he leaves niu, something joe said really stands out. >> one of the first illusions to fear is expose yourself to that fear. when you do that, pay attention to how you're feeling. you realize that i can handle the fear. >> and other than columbine, no place on this journey holds more fear and trepidation for sam than virginia tech. >> it was april 16, and i figured that they were just playing some old footage of columbine, and i looked up, and i noticed that there was a live symbol in red at the bottom of the screen. >> this is easily the saddest place in our nation tonight,

because this place will now be known forever as the scene of the largest mass shooting in u.s. history. >> my heart just exploded. and i couldn't get myself under control, and i pretty much went in and out of what felt like blacking out. and i was just floored, just speechless. >> and that memory is making him anxious as he nears the campus. but he's comforted by the thought that a friend is waiting. christina anderson, a virginia tech survivor sam has already interviewed for his documentary. sam even showed her around columbine. >> see, there's like a window? >> now she will return the favor. >> oh, yeah, there she is! >> hi, buddy. >> hi.

>> you're here in real life. >> oh, buddy. thank you for coming. >> norris hall is where 30 students and professors were killed, where christina herself was shot three times. >> and so that's the hallway, the second floor is where it happened. >> this photo of christina became one of the most dramatic and enduring images of the tragedy, and to think christina tells sam that she usually skipped this particular class. >> we just decided not to go. how life would have been -- that's actually crazy when you go into how life could have been different. yeah. >> but you, it didn't happen that way. >> exactly. exactly. >> so here we are. >> christina has never been able to spend more than a couple of minutes in the classroom, but sam's presence gives her the courage to suggest they should have their conversation just a

few feet from where she was almost killed. >> he was halfway down the hallway at this point and shooting in the classrooms. he shot me the first time in the back, and he came back and shot me in the back again. there was no barrier. it was just a person who had a gun and a very horrible intent, if you think about that that's even possible in today's world, for some idiot to decide and to end that many lives. >> and then he killed himself in this room. >> yeah. in the front, like right here. >> recounting the shooting is something christina believes has been integral to her emotional recovery, but it didn't come easy. >> the first, like public talk i gave about the shooting, we must have spent six months prepping for it with my therapist. i would get to pick where i started the story, and we could quickly figure out at one point my voice would start shaking or

i would slow down or start crying, and then we would talk and focus really minutely on that detail. >> and no matter how many times she shares her experience, emotions can still bubble up, some quite unexpectedly. >> like your daughter's been shot. >> like today when christina recalls how her mom, driving to the hospital on that tragic day, believed her daughter might have been killed. >> my mom was, like, losing it completely the entire time. >> it's okay. >> it was like two hours into the ride. and they, the doctor called. and he told them that i was going to be okay. and so they got there, like right as i woke up. >> you're okay now. >> it's not that, i knew i was going to be okay.

it's my mom, like. >> that happened to me. >> sam's got a story about his mom, too. how i saw her for the first time after he escaped columbine with his life. >> she was holding me up as i was hugging her, and i was just crying so much. i try and explain this feeling to people where there's no more barriers of safety between life and death. >> yes. >> and seeing my mom was the first barrier i could put back up, and it was like, such an overwhelming sensation. >> for christina, the memories of all these scenes of human fragility are what makes the buildup to each anniversary so difficult. >> this is the day that everyone wants to share with you what they've been through and how they heard about it. but it's also the day that you almost lost your life. and i think the part that makes you really scared is it reminds

you how vulnerable we were and are. >> but on this day sam and christina have each other. and a photo to remember the special bond they shared. >> we took a picture, and she said that was by far the happiest i've ever been in a picture in front of norris hall. >> so maybe there was some two-way healing in this little visit. >> yeah, i mean, it means so much to her and to me to know that the power of these friendships and these connections can heal and hold your hand through all these places and these moments. had. >> before he left, sam spent a few moments reflecting at virginia tech's victims' memorial on a bench engraved with the words, in honor of the survivors. >> one of the kind of miraculous things that happened was it

started snowing. pan when virginia tech happened in 2007, it started snowing on that day. i just had to sit there for a while and feel it. feel the snow hitting my face. it was really, really magical. ♪ hello, my old heart ♪ how have you been ♪ how has it been ♪ don't you worry ♪ in there you're safe >>next stop, columbine. coming up, finding light in the darkness. >> this is huge for me being in here right now. >> i feel completely changed. ♪

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♪ toward the end of his journey, sam had a dream. attacked me with what seemed to be like a knife. and i disarmed this sort of of healing perhaps? of a new ability to face the month of april? >> i'm trying to finally take control of my situation.

and all the things that i'm going through, everything that's coming at me, i'm taking control of it and fighting back. >> his entire ten-day journey has led here, sam's final stop. >> so this is it. this is columbine high school. >> for sam, this will be a good opportunity to judge how transformative his cross-country trip has been. he doesn't know it yet, but something remarkable is about to happen. >> not really nervous about going back. because i had the opportunity to go back every single day my senior year and be there with my friends. ♪ hello, my old heart ♪ how have you been >>so the door would have been right about here? >> yeah. this is kind of where the old school ended. and it looked like doors like that, but, you know, here, this spot right here is one of the places in my story that impacted me gratefully, you know, where i

lost one of a few of my really good friends. >> so you weren't eating. you were in here studying. >> i was. i was trying to find a place to study. >> as many times as he's been back, some places are still off limits. sam has never had the courage to enter the room where he struggled to keep the door shut, the source of a lot of his trauma. but as he shows us where he was sitting in the cafeteria as the shooting began, he suddenly continues into the kitchen and into that room. >> there were already other students and a couple of other workers, and i was the last one in here, and we turned around. i closed the door, you know. we were sitting on the ground here. >> without prompting, sam suddenly lies on the floor to demonstrate how he kept the door shut. >> you know, people were pushing on my knees, and, you know, i was on my back.

>> it is a major breakthrough, one that sam doesn't even realize he's made until he gets back on his feet. >> this is huge for me being in here right now, and me sort of being okay with it. >> you've been on a gut-wrenching tour and you've heard a lot of accounts, some more frightening than this. has that changed how you process all this? >> it has, you know. on this journey i was also in the rooms with the victims. >> but you -- >> just like you and me right now and learning to be okay in those spaces probably built me up enough to be able to come in here more comfortably and sort of talk it out. this is actually really, really nice for me right now to sort of be in here and soak it in. frank and i, we're family members now. >> in the hallway, we meet frank deangeles, sam's principal. after the tragedy, deangeles

vowed to stay on until every student in the columbine district that day, including the preschoolers had graduated. he is retiring this year. >> do you remember the first time sam came back after graduating? >> i do. he was sitting in a chair, and all of a sudden i look up. these tears are starting to come down his eyes, and i start crying. and even though sam is 30 plus, they're still my kids. and took me back to that day when they were teen abageteenag just wanted to wipe away that hurt. >> sam and the frank have joined a group of columbine survivors who have gathered. >> when you hear about sam's journey, what are you thinking? >> that's what we all thoep do. >> and i think that's where the true healing is going to m could. it's truly connecting with suffer survivors. and there's a bond we share at

columbine but also with those elsewhere. >> sam's on the right track. >> oh, absolutely. >> it's exactly that kind of bond that sam discovered on his journey. the survivors he met are now part of his columbine wounded minds project, and he hopes to raise enough money to not only finish his film but to make it a resource for all trauma victims. he is not alone. his friends have the started support organizations. they hope to redefine what columbine means from a word sin on muss with tragedy. >> we try to get out there and protect or heal or. >> it's a gift that we were given, and what we're doing with it. i think is incredible.

♪ nothing lasts forever ♪ some things aren't meant to be ♪ ♪ never find the answers ♪ till you set your heart free ♪ till you set your own heart free ♪ >>i feel completely changed. no one's ever going to heal overnight. but as this anniversary approaches, i've gained a lot of tools that will sort of help me process things one at a time and sort of listen to myself, and i can use it to help reach out to millions of other people.

♪ . - previously on believe... - bo is a very special little girl. - bo is a candidate to degrade, roman. you have to admit that. - stop it! - the more she channels, the more likely she is to end up like her mother. - do you have a problem with what i'm asking you to do? winter took her. - enough. - and i intend to use every resource at my command to recover bo. - you felt it when you first met her. - so she has an effect on people, so what? - she's yo daughter. bo is your daughter. - she--she doesn't know? - that'll be your privilege. -- a children's story.? - that makes sense, since you're a...a child. - yeah. i know my audience.