tavis: good evening. from los angeles, i am tavis smiley. tonight a conversation with nia long. she is starring in the hit movie, "the best man holiday." we are glad you joined us for a conversation with nia long coming up right now. ♪

>> and by contributions to your pbs station from viewers like you. thank you. tavis: nia long was one of the " was a hite best man in 1999. sequel.s in the they have come together for a long holiday weekend when they discover how easy it is for rivalries and romances to be

reignited. let's take a look at a clip. >> i have to bail on dinner. fine.is totally you could have called. you could have e-mail. >> none of my devices are working, so i thought i should deliver the message in person. i changed my flight, so i can come. >> what about vermont? >> the family understands. if it is important for you it is important for me. >> you guys want me to wait outside? >> shut up. will talk to you later. it was nice to meet you. >> i guess i will see you this weekend. >> i hope so. like to ski in vermont with my devices. >> i hate you so much. kissing a that you

white man? >> that was not my first white man. they like all flavors, tavis. come on now. >> i don't want to give this away, but we know one piece of the story line. during 15ur character years later? >> jordan was a segment producer in the first film. now she is running the network. she is a producer. she is taking her time. she is focused on her career. she put love and relationships on the side burner to be this amazing producer, and she made it. now she is realizing as the story developed you see she is truly recognizing there is power in being folder up all in and careerartner

isn't everything. i think that is something a lot of women struggle with. tavis: was there something you needed to see to make you want to come back to this. sometimes people do things a second time or a third time for a fourth time and i wish they stopped after the first time. as an actress what did you need to see the second time around to make you want to do it again? >> i think the main thing was the entire cast supported the idea of doing a sequel. that was it for me. i don't think any of us would have done it had we not all been part of it. we are all friends. we have all grown. our careers have grown. we have become parents. our lives have changed. it was an interesting notion to see what would happen if you put this group of friends together

17, 18 years later, and where is their life now? going to bes not what anyone expects. i don't think the story is going to be what anyone expects. tavis: you are kissing white guys. i should stop this. >> the white guys are not going to tune in. we love you, white guys. guys love youte obviously. you are right that the character lives have changed. you are also right that the act or's lives have changed. niathere parallels between of how their terms lives have changed over the years? isi think the major thing before i became a mom it was all about my career. many films can i do?

how many places can i travel? how many red eyes can i do and come on that and feel great? priorities are different. my priority is about making sure i have time with my kids, making sure i have time to do the things i want to do with my career and continued to make movies but also to think about the next phase, which is writing id producing and directing have dabbled in it before but now more than ever it is something i am passionate about. >> the last time we saw each other was last july. i love the show. >> that is their fault. here is

the thing. one season.e to do they will bring on a couple of characters every season. it wasn't like i was signed on to be a permanent fixture. you.: i wanted to see >> i wanted to. margie khan is a you know what. i even saw don cheadle. i don't remember where we were. i was like tom a you have to bring her back. he was like, if i brought her back i would have to kill her. i am late, great, i have never died in anything. when: i did not know that i said it. >> they could call me. you never know. stop me fromsn't asking the question i want to ask, which is over these 15 years since you did the first goneman, has your career in the way you thought it would

go? forget jordan. the trajectory-- been the way you wanted it to be 14 years ago? >> nobody has asked that question. i don't think i have thought about it in those terms. my commitment to this business has been to do the things that move me, to understand there are political challenges, to understand there are things that are so far out of my control but that i can still aspire to get to where i want to be regardless not, soey choose me or it took a long time to get to the place where that is the reality. for most actors we have to wait to be picked. that is how the game works. tavis: let me jump in. how do you go about getting work

-- where you want to be without waiting to be chosen? the problem with this business were black actors and actresses are concerned if they cannot hold in their head the names of more than two or three people at a time. you are in the flow, and then they move on to next three. for others a variety of people can work in a variety of roles, but for us they have two or three negroes, and they are going to work until they are out. >> or until you start asking for the money you deserve, and they start finding someone else who is a like essays unless. -- alike. tavis: how have you gotten to where you are without waiting to be chosen? that's when i close the door my life is my life. my children are everything.

i am smart with my money. i don't live beyond my means. i have a great partner. when they don't want me someone else does. i close my doors, and i am mommy, and that is the greatest thing. i am not afraid to say no. sometimes it's hard to say no, but i would rather make the adjustment to my own life so i can always say no if it is not right for me. there is a lot of security in that. takes a sense of fearlessness. i am a self-made woman. i have never compromise myself. i just take one moment at a time. i meditate. i pray. insulated.lf there is that inner circle. then there is the outer circle. if you keep yourself where you need to be in here, i feel like the rest should come. you have got to trust.

you have to trust whatever is for you is for you. trust the have to process. >> you have to trust the process. that there is a peace and tranquility and youeredness that comes when close the door that only your family and loved ones can bring, but you are also an artist. when those choices you would like to be making don't come your way, how do you go about expressing yourself artistically? i just get some paper and some crayons, and we draw. [laughter] the truth is this. there are moments when i am frustrated. there are moments when i am disappointed. there are moments when i go, how come i didn't know about that? say, are moments when i

that such a great opportunity, but i am never angry, because i go back to my faith, and that is a part that allows me to go, it was just her turn. it was just his turn. i have seen people come and go. the most amazing part of all this is i am still here. age,rted at such a young and i am only 25. i reinvented myself and morphed myself into many characters, but i am still standing, so i look forward to the next age of my career. gets tove a child who come with me. if i fail i know there is someone to pick me back up. i don't have any regrets. i have a few, but i don't have anything that makes me feel like i blew it on that one. to do whatare going

you want to do. >> everybody knows that. i don't know why everybody knows that about me. tavis: you say you have some regrets. we all do. we make mistakes. we have regrets, but when you say you have regrets, are they regrets on roles taken, roles sense down, give me some of the categories. a film many years ago called alfie. i really thought more people would support that film, and it thought that would be the one that would break the glass ceiling for me, and it didn't happen, and it was ok, but that to me was like thomas here i am, the only one of two black people you think itand takes that to break the black --

the glass ceiling, but it doesn't matter who is in the film with you. it is the project, the timing, the director. if this who you project on that screen, and when all those things come in a perfect package you know you have taken it to the next level, but i am not sitting here going, i should have more than what i have, or why am i not a big fat movie star making millions of dollars? i am not so concerned about that. is my past. it miss him so much, and one day he said to me, it's not a race. it's a marathon, and you will run forever. you will be in the race for ever, and he was like a brother to me, and when i start to feel

that, i cannot believe i am tearing up right now. me, becausegh for he actually passed away the day after i gave her up to my baby in the same hospital one floor down, so here i am giving birth. everyone is in my hospital room, we are all excited, and i get a call that he passed away. was such an important person in my life and still is because it think about him all the time, and we started in the business together when he was nominated for his first grammy, i was a young actress on a soap opera, and he said, will you be my date? we were best friends for that , so he wouldlife

is not ay to me, it race. it is a marathon, and you have everything you want, what i feel really full and happy. i would like to see more diversity in the world, but everyone has that feeling. i think it is part of the journey you take as an artist to not always have what you want, that you get it in stages. tavis: i accept that. let me express my own frustration on your behalf and on behalf of fans like myself. very mature, very adult way of handling it. here is the real deal. i cannot think of one or two ,ctresses who are more beloved more adored, more celebrated

than you are inside of black america, and we are huge chunk of the moviegoing public. when is a reason why even you ain't starring in nothing you are still on the covers of african-american magazines. you sell magazines because black people love nia long. >> thank you, black people. tavis: there is a frustration people have that we don't get to see you more. we mad we cannot see you more. the other part of it is there are people, and i am not going to name names, but there are people who are less gifted, less talented, whom we see more than we see you. part of the frustration is there is not a lot we as ticket buyers can say or do about that except .o support the work you are in

we vote with our ticket stubs would we come see you, but that is our frustration. i know i need anger management that leadsong, but to a question, which is how you navigate seeing folk who are less talented, and that is a judgment every actor has to make, but i know there has got to be times when you look at wow.hing like, > i have said wow a lot. i have, but i don't think i have ever looked at anyone else's career and said, that should have been me. i really don't.

when i think about, i am so proud of what kerry washington is doing with "kindle." that was her job. scandal. that was her job. wouldn'tgnant, so that have worked out for me. it was her job, and she is doing an amazing job. said, did you audition for that? how come that wasn't you? those are my fans who absolutely loves me, and i am sure they well.erry as i don't want to walk around being that angry lactic -- black chick. tavis: i am going to go back to alfie. that example was insightful about the way you view your

career. every actor wants to break through that ceiling. you are doing bad, because you ain't. daily,you navigate hoping and praying for that moment when you are going to break through? >> that is an internal thing. that.k that i have i think i have grown as a woman, as a mother, as a partner, as an artist. i don't feel like i am lacking in any way. i feel really good. i wish i had a different answer, but that really is my honest answer.

the other part of it is i don't really feel the need to rush through. i think the one great thing about being an act or or is you can be an actor for the rest of your life. i may not win my academy award until i am 70 something years old, but i am going to get there. i am not worried about, is it going to happen? you have got to look at it like this. people met me when i was 16 years old, and that is when i started in this is news. i turned 43 in nine days. time, so i have lived my life in front of the camera, and the times you saw me shy away was because there were things in my life that were more important. i never wanted to be this age and not have children. i never wanted to not have

family. that was never part of my plan. you can have everything but not at the same time. >> we will circle back to best man holiday. what is the joy of being reunited with an all-star cast of black folk in a movie that is full of fun and some insights as well? what is the joy like of being on set with that energy coming at you? >> we had days where it felt like you were college dorm mates . the girls were constantly counting calories. you aren't supposed to have that. the girls were counting calories. the boys and the girls would have these in depth conversations about relationships and the difference between men and women.

terrance isn't married, but taye is married. maurice is married. and he is married. are married,irls which i find interesting. closest toly the marriage. there is a lot of debate, and the biggest debate was can a black man who is successful and famous actually handle a black woman who is equal? that was a big one. we were a bunch of loud mouth, complaining, proud women, but they are the same way about certain things. tavis: that is a movie. the writing, producing, direct and, how serious about that are

you? >> i have the rights to my dear -- who is wolf amazing. story about how we met, but this is a coming-of- age film about a single mom who in order to save her children had to learn how to box. it is her journey from the times two with 18 until she became a professional boxer, and a lot of guys know who she is. they have featured her on hbo. i saw the story. they said, you are going to love the story. i watched her, i called her, i got the rights. tavis: you are going to star in it? >> i am going to direct it. i don't want to be in the boxing ring. i was like, no thank you. thes: i want to celebrate

beauty of these covers our friend -- >> we had so much fun. >> those are all the sisters. there are the brothers. this is going to be a huge film. it is going to open big. you can take it from there. i am going to congratulate you in advance. show for tonight. thanks for watching. as always, keep the faith. >> for more information on today's show, visit tavis smiley at pbs.org. tavis: hi, i'm tavis smiley. join me next time for a conversation with bob newhart, who finally won an emmy award. that's next time. we will see you then. ♪

>> and by contributions to your pbs station from viewers like you. thank you. >> be mo

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