making a wave when you can temporary layoffs good times easy credit rip-offs good times scratching and surviving good times hanging in a chow line good times ain't we lucky we got 'em?

up, up, up, up. oh, mama! i was just kissing the supremes. and i don't mean one at a time. well, let me give you some facts of life, honey. if the supremes really love you, they'll be back tonight. ohh! it's freezing in here. what happened to the heat? by the time it gets up here, it's air-conditioning. did you see my can of hair spray? no, honey. yeah. it's under the sink. i used it last night to wipe out some bugs. you used my hair spray on bugs? yeah, but it didn't do a thing for 'em. they was all bald. enough of that, j.j.

well, i'm a cinch to cop an "a" in art. you always do that. what about your other classes? what kind of marks to you expect? well, algebra -- so-so. english -- could be. history -- maybe. espaol -- comme ci, comme ca. "comme ci, comme ca" is french, stupid. which gives you an idea how i'm doing in espaol. well, i just hope your grades are good enough to get you through the 11th grade. you're the tallest boy in that class. if you think i'm having problems, mama, you should see the kid who sits behind me. he's 5'4". he can't pass 'cause he's having trouble seeing the blackboard. and you're right with him. j.j., you haven't got a prayer of passing. you never even looked at a book this term. keep her talking, michael. i'll grab the bathroom.

those with the shortest legs got the longest wait. mama, does a rich man have more than one bathroom? yeah, but just like a poor man, he can't use but one at a time. get dressed. you're gonna be late for school. foxy mama! ooh. cool it, lover boy. my husband is due home any minute. huh? oh, james. it's you! foxy papa. you better believe it. except neither one of us has had a chance to be very foxy since you've been working that midnight shift. well, i got a feeling all that's gonna change real soon. yeah? yeah. the janitorial service is looking for

a foreman's job, huh? that's right, baby. i'm gonna be the boss -- the main man. if a cat ain't doing his work to my satisfaction, i just say to him, "hey, robinson --" robinson? you call your employees by their last name? well, baby, that is an employer's prerogative. "robinson, i don't like the way you're washing them windows. "you're just hanging out the window daydreaming. you're finished, chump. give me that safety belt." the cat didn't even hang around for his paycheck. oh, james, it sure would be fine if you get that job. when you think you'll know for sure? well, baby, they're supposed to call me for an interview today. and if we lucky, it's back to regular hours, regular meals... and regular loving. have mercy. mama, papa! isn't there any decency?

have your breakfast, or you're gonna be late for school. james, i'll heat you up some stew for breakfast. oh, i think i'll just have some coffee, baby. daddy, don't forget to sign my report card. i got all a's. all right, my man. i get my report card today. i should get mostly a's and b's. good. want to talk about your report card now, junior? i sure would like to, dad, but it's my turn to say the blessing. all right, son. go ahead. and take this hat off! lord, thank you for the food. and now that i've done something for you, i could use a boost in the algebra department. amen. j.j., you're not supposed to use your prayers to ask for personal favors. you know, junior, when you was born, i just dreamed of the day that you'd go to college. i never figured on a little stumbling block

james, let's don't jump to any conclusions. i was a little bit worried, too, but j.j. has passed before, and he probably will pass again. that's right. i always get off to a slow start, but i always come through in the stretch. j.j., you wouldn't care to bet on making it to the 12th grade, would you? yeah. and if i pass, i'm in the bathroom first for a whole month. a bet? a bet. and if you don't pass, you do the dishes for a whole month. a bet? a bet. hey, it's getting late. you kids better get moving now. time's running out. bye, sweetheart. see you later, daddy. you be careful. okay, we'll be careful. and you all go straight to school, you hear? and come straight home. yeah, without a doubt. okay, baby. oh, baby, i sure hope junior does make it. me too. imagine -- next year,

yeah, florida, that's something i've been looking forward to -- the whole family sitting there watching junior march down the aisle in his cap and gown, the head of his graduation class. i'll settle for the middle of the class. i'll settle for the end of the line. ma, here's my report card -- all a's and one b. i'll catch up with you yet, michael. michael, thelma, i'm so proud of you. oh, and look at that, thelma -- an "a" in english, b-plus in algebra, and "a" in history! oh, your daddy is gonna be so proud of you! we got two geniuses here. well, mama... now from the sublime to the ridiculous.

don't forget, mama -- i'm the victim of 300 years of oppression. all right! just what i always wanted -- sleep-in help. oh, thelma, this is no time to tease your brother. i won a bet, ma. i won a bet. didn't you pass anything? don't forget, mama -- i'm still your firstborn. j.j., what are you talking about? you passed! faked you all out! [ shouting indistinctly ] dy-no-mite! and, girl, take a good look at that bathroom 'cause that's the last time you're gonna see it for a month. hey, what's all the hollering about? james, j.j. passed into the 12th grade. say what? j.j. passed!

you want to hear it in instant replay. you want an instant replay? i'm show you instant replay. faked you all out! oh, junior, i'm really proud of you, son. you got an "a" in art and a "c" in all the rest of your classes. how, junior? how'd you get those grades without doing any studying? i'll tell you how. 'cause i'm blessed with total recall. i read something once, and it stays right here like it's chiseled in stone. you got a "c" in history on your report card, but you got an "f" on this history exam. how come? i can explain that, mama. good. and maybe you can also tell me what happened in the year 1066. how should i know? i wasn't even born yet. now, junior, your mother asked you a question. now go on, tell her -- what happened in 1066? the battle of hastings. right. come on, junior. tell us.

that's easy. see, i was just kidding before. i figure these things out by word association. and what's the first thing a referee says to a boxer when he's counting out? 10, right? so right away i know that 10 stands for boxing. now the 66 -- i add 10 to the 66, and that gives me 76. that's the year the colonies rebelled against england, which gives me the world "rebellion." you put "boxer" with "rebellion," and what do you get? 1066 -- boxer rebellion. i ought to box your ears. 1066 was the battle of hastings. well, my system is subject to human error. all right. let's try algebra. "if it takes 2 men 3 days "to dig a ditch 20 feet by 30 feet long, how long would it take 4 men to dig the same ditch?" come on, junior. tell her.

i ain't no ditch digger. i'm an artiste. what do i have to know algebra for, anyway? what am i -- an algerian? florida, there's something wrong with this report card here. i'm reading c's, but i'm hearing f's. something tells me you ain't learning nothing, junior. aw. maybe we ought to go down to that school and have a talk with your principal. i tell you, this is the last time i'm coming home with a good report card. all right, junior. we're gonna give you one more chance. if you don't answer this question, we're gonna march you straight down to the principal's office. fair enough? fair enough. i have confidence in my ability. go ahead. lay it on me. all right. what is a dangling participle?

[daughter] sometimes the hallways felt like a giant maze. [mother] jenny didn't feel like going to school, and she slept during the day and was up at night. she seemed irritable all the time. [daughter] it felt like there was a weight on my shoulders. and the weight was really hard to hold up. [mother] one day my daughter was crying, that's when jenny told us she thought about hurting herself. [daughter] then my parents got me treatment.

but, honey, your daddy and i want everything to work out right. now wait here. how can i have a fair trial without being allowed in there? j.j., we want to talk to the principal alone first. mama, my life is on the line. i demand the right to defend my life in person! shut up. i withdraw the demand. kirkman: come in. i'm mr. kirkman. hi, mr. kirkman. i'm mr. evans. this is mrs. evans. how do you do? how do you do? sit down, please. thank you. well, how can i help you folks? well, we came here to complain about our son's grades. oh, that's too bad. you have no idea how often i hear that -- a boy failing. the boy is passing. i'm sorry, folks. there's nothing i can do --

that's right. well, then, what's the problem? his head. whatever you all are putting in here, he's leaving someplace else 'cause he sure ain't bringing it home. yeah, he don't know what happened in 1066. and if you was to put him in a ditch 20 by 30 feet, there ain't no way in the world he could dig himself out. here. look at this. well, now, mr. and mrs. evans, this is a good report -- all c's and an "a" in art. young james is doing well. yeah, but old james want to know how he did it. our son is gonna be facing a tough world pretty soon, and we want to make sure he has a real education. we don't want him pushed through high school like he was going through a three-minute car wash and coming out still wet behind his ears. mr. and mrs. evans, i appreciate how you feel

but, you see, we lack the facilities and the money that schools in more privileged areas have. this has been happening in all the cities in the united states. you do understand, don't you? oh, yeah. we understand the lack of money real good. well, that's good. perhaps you could understand this. i have thousands of students in this school and a graduating class of over 600. now, if i don't graduate a large percentage of that group, i wind up looking like i'm not doing too good a job. you, uh, you dig? better than that. we understand. that's good. well, now, if i don't graduate a high percentage, our budget is cut. and if our budget is cut, our teaching staff suffers.

mr. kirkman, that is exactly what we came here to talk to you about. you certainly did. i see we're in total agreement. total agreement my foot, man! we're in total confusion! sir, you have to understand the system. one hand washes the other. you have to help us move the pupils along. and i'll help you by giving your son a diploma. and with that diploma, it'll help him get a job. a job? what the hell good is a job, man? i got a job. i got two jobs. hell, i had jobs all my life. but i want something more for my son. i want him to have an opportunity, and you and i both know that opportunities only come through an education. either james evans jr. gets a good education or we're gonna know why. that's right. but, folks, the system. mr. kirkman, please don't make me tell you what you can do with your system.

you got it. you realize that he's gonna be falling behind his classmates? do you think he'll agree to it? i assure you he'll agree to it. james, it has to be his own decision. come in, junior. now, j.j., you've got a big decision to make. james... it's up to you now. if you want to move along in the senior year with your classmates, our school is right behind you. now, they're just pushing you through here. them grades you got -- you didn't deserve them, junior. they just gave them to you to get rid of you. but we told mr. kirkman our son came to school to learn, not just get pushed around. plus, he's got pride. just like his daddy. and nobody's gonna push him through school without putting something into his head. 'cause he's got pride.

now, either you do the smart thing and stay in the 11th grade, or let them push you through the 12th grade like a big jackass. now, make up your mind, son. and remember, junior, you got pride. well? what do you say, junior? go ahead. well, mr. kirkman... ...i'm proud to go along with your quota system and take my place in the senior class. j., i don't know what's gonna become of you, sliding through school like this. oh, mama, don't worry about me. i can always make a living as a painter. that's right, mama.

j.j., i've got to tell you that your daddy and me was real disappointed in you today. you're gonna need that education when the school turns you out into the streets. what's gonna happen -- somebody's gonna pull me into an alleyway and say, "tell me what happened in 1066. otherwise, i'll blow your brains out"? he could blow your brains out with a soda straw. look who's talking about smarts -- the same girl who talks to pictures of billy dee williams and cries when they don't answer back. you two get along like sonny and cher. ma, don't be mad. i'm not mad. i may do real good in the 12th grade. i may surprise you. they may even pick me to make the graduation speech. that'll be the day. thelma! "classmates, parents,

"...as we leave these ivory-colored walls, "let us be inspired by our principal, who once said, "'show me a man who can laugh when he's down, "and i'll show you a happy wino.' "i would now like to leave you with these two latin words -- cesar romero." you know, that's the closest you've been to a book all year. how did you do at the interview, honey? daddy, are you gonna be the new foreman? no, baby. oh, daddy, i'm sorry. you want to tell me about it, james? there's not much to tell, baby.

i was qualified and i had the experience. but when i got to the application, that's where i blew it. how? you know on the bottom of the application where they ask you why you think you're the right man for the job? well, baby, i just couldn't put my words together. the words i could think of -- i wasn't sure if i was spelling them right. and the words i was sure i could spell didn't have nothing to do with what they wanted. and, florida, it was a chance. you don't get too many chances when all you got going for you is a 6th-grade education. well, there's another way of looking at it, honey. at least you're getting turned down on better jobs. daddy, i've been thinking. yeah, junior? you know, it ain't that i don't want to learn. it's just that i was too proud to be left behind my classmates. j.j., does that mean you're gonna stay in the 11th grade?

but what i was thinking was that next term in my senior year, i'm gonna study hard -- i mean really study hard. i'm gonna pay attention in class and do my homework. if i get stuck, i'm gonna ask somebody smarter to help me. i'm always available, junior. ah, son, now you're talking sense. junior, i don't want you to ever blow an opportunity 'cause you don't know to hang the right words together. you hear me? all right. well, baby, what you think? you think junior can make it through his senior year? he already has. you should have heard his graduation speech. it was beautiful. he left us with two latin words --

-- captions by vitac -- www.vitac.com

good times anytime you need a payment good times anytime you need a friend good times anytime you're out from under not getting hassled, not getting hustled

making a wave when you can temporary layoffs good times easy credit rip-offs good times scratching and surviving good times hanging in a chow line good times ain't we lucky we got 'em?