or the ford ltd. ltd--limited. it's a limited edition. what do they make, 50 million of those? yes, it's limited to the number we can sell. or when they try and mangle a positive word into a car name. you know how they'll do that? the integra. oh, integrity? no. integra. the supra or the impresa. well, i hope it's not a lemona, huh? or you'll be hearing from my lawya. and it feels like your lifeate revolves around your symptoms,

ask your gastroenterologist about humira adalimumab. humira has been proven to work for adults who have tried other medications but still experience the symptoms of moderate to severe crohn's disease. in clinical studies, the majority of patients on humira saw significant symptom relief, and many achieved remission. humira can lower your ability to fight infections, including tuberculosis. serious, sometimes fatal events, such as infections, lymphoma, or other types of cancer, have happened. blood, liver and nervous system problems, serious allergic reactions, and new or worsening heart failure have occurred. before starting humira, your doctor should test you for tb. ask your doctor if you live in or have been to a region where certain fungal infections are common. tell your doctor if you have had tb, hepatitis b, are prone to infections, or have symptoms such as fever, fatigue, cough, or sores. you should not start humira if you have any kind of infection. get headed in a new direction. with humira, remission is possible. sure i can't show you any other cars? i don't think so, vic. done my homework.

'89 volvo. that's the car for me. i've got a le baron convertible right here. n.i.--not interested. got a few more miles on it, but the previous owner was jon voight. jon voight? captioning made possible by columbia tristar domestic television o.k., tim. you're welcome. was that tim watley? yes, it was. he wanted your address. you, my friend, are going to be invited to his night before thanksgiving party. he's got that great apartment on 77th street, and they overlook where they inflate all those huge balloons for the macy's thanksgiving day parade. i've always had a crush on tim watley. why can't he ask me out? you don't want to go out with a dentist. why? well, he'll always be criticizing your brushing technique. it'll drive you crazy. away from the gums. new car! oh! hey! did you get the volvo? no, i decided to go with an '89 le baron.

a le baron? i thought consumer said volvo was the car. what consumer? i'm the consumer. yeah. seems like a strange choice. well, maybe so. but it, uh, was good enough for mr. jon voight. jon voight? the actor? that's right. he just happened to be the previous owner of the, uh, vehicle. you bought a car because it belonged to jon voight? no. no. i think yes, yes. you like the idea of telling people you're driving jon voight's car. maybe i do. so what? i've never even seen him in a car. look at his movies. no cars. hey. jerry, you know that shoe repair place at the end of the block? if they don't get business, they'll shut down and make way for one of those gourmet coffee or cookie stores. i like coffee.

i like cookies. of course you do. and you know why? because you're a bunch of yuppies. it's your go-go corporate takeover lifestyles that are driving out these mom and pop stores and destroying the fabric of this neighborhood. what's so great about a mom and pop store? if my mom and pop ran a store, i wouldn't shop there. hey, bogambo, they've been in the neighborhood for 48 years. you've got to have a pair of shoes in need of a cobbler. i really don't wear the shoes that have to be cobbled. well, what about sneakers? they'll clean them. they do complete detailing. all right. take 'em. yeah, yeah, yeah. kramer, without you, we'd be out of business. these sneakers belong to my neighbor jerry seinfeld, the comedian. so many sneakers. he's got a peter pan complex. they'll be ready a week from thursday. oh, well, no rush. uh-oh. what's the matter? i keep getting these nosebleeds. lie down. and put your head back.

[thud] hey, what's with your ceiling? what? you got wires sticking out every which way. it looks dangerous. you should call the electrician. you know, in the 48 years we've been here, i don't think we've ever called an electrician. well, you should. this place could blow any minute. [radio plays big band music] elaine. yes, mr. pitt? have you gotten all the salt off those pretzels yet? no. i'm still working on it. what are you listening to? artie shaw. honeysuckle jump. that was artie shaw-- honeysuckle jump. elaine, how did you know that? my father used to have a huge collection of big band records. congratulations to our listener wayne hopper for identifying it.

by doing so, he becomes our seventh person to man the woody woodpecker balloon in the macy's thanksgiving day parade. there are only three spots left. when we come back, you'll have three more chances to win a spot holding up woody woodpecker. could you identify the next song? could you? why would you want to hold the ropes from the woody woodpecker balloon? my father was a stern man. he forbade us to participate in any activities he thought were associated with the common man. the thanksgiving day parade was first on the list. all right. i'll do the best i can. here we go for the next spot under the balloon. if you know this next song, call 555-band. [song plays] well, elaine? do you know it? shut up! i can't hear! i'm sorry! oh! i've got it! it's next stop, pottersville. goody! yes, yes, yes! next stop, pottersville! next stop, pottersville! you are a genius!

you are gonna love this car, even if you don't like jon voight. it's strange to buy a car because he might have driven it. you don't think he really owned this car? i don't know. why would the guy make up that? of all the names he could pick, why jon voight? see, that's the genius of it. if he'd said liam neeson, you'd know he's making it up. liam neeson? i mean, you're comparing liam neeson with jon voight. jerry, we're talking about joe buck. if you can play joe buck, oskar schindler's a cakewalk. oh, look at this. i stepped in gum. whoa. you're not getting in my car with gummy shoes. all right. i'll change my shoes. liam neeson. you know he's not american. let me get a clean pair. ♪ everybody's talkin' at me ♪ ♪ but i can't hear a word they're sayin' ♪

♪ just drivin' round in jon voight's car ♪ kramer! [door slams] hey, where's all my sneakers? you said take 'em. not all of them! well, obviously, there was a miscommunication. obviously. so what am i supposed to wear? jerry, i left you a pair right here. come on. you're not looking. here. there. put on those boots. i can't wear these. well, why not? they're uncomfortable. come on here. try 'em on. oh... where did you get those? i worked a club in dallas. they couldn't pay me, so they gave me these. oh, i can't wear these. they look ridiculous. you look like a cowboy! i don't want to be a cowboy! oh, stop it. you know tim the dentist? i got an invitation to his thanksgiving eve party.

yeah? i got one, too. oh, yeah? huh. what? no. nothing. what is it? no, it's jdn'tust thet . you didn't get one? but he called and asked for yours and elaine's addresses. i'm sure that means i'm invited. not necessarily. why would you call someone and ask for two addresses if you're not invited? that's the genius of it. i'm calling elaine. see if she can find out anything from tim whatley. hey, i got jon voight's le baron. boss. $4,000! we can't afford that. you have to do something about it because it's in violation of the building code. otherwise, they'll close you up. supposing we can't pay for it? then i have to report you. otherwise, i lose my license.

sorry. 48 years, mom. now we havtoe of that idiotand . afternoon, mom. afternoon, pop. you got a crack in the sidewalk. you ought to get that fixed. [humming theme from midnight cowboy] so? put the top up. it's november. i feel alive, jerry. let's check out the glove box. a pencil. hey, you don't think... sure. that's jon voight's pencil. with jon voight's teeth marks. whoo! owner's manual. you know what? this car was owned by jon voight. you see? i told you. except jon is spelled with an "h." j-o-h-n. so? doesn't jon voight spell his name j-o-n?

so what are you saying? nothing. jon probably misspelled hiswn nam i know somesjerrwith a "g"... and an "i." get out of the car! what? get out. you're ruining this whole experience. oh, look. there's gregory peck's bicycle. get out! and barbara mandrell's skateboard. get out! hey, cowboy. where's your horse? yeah, you better run.

yeah, you betcha, honey. ahh, you think so? [ female announcer ] some mornings you just can't eat at the table. eggo® wafflers are packed with flavors like brown sugar cinnamon roll, so you don't need syrup. eggo® wafflers. simply delicious™. [ female announcer ] introducing the windex touch-up cleaner. dab it... clean it... done. it's a one-handed clean from windex... ♪ ...that stays out to kill 99.9% of bacteria... ♪ ...and quickly clean so you keep moving. what do we call this new dance move? the windex tush-up. [ female announcer ] the all-new windex touch-up cleaner. sc johnson. a family company.

windex touch-up cleaner. did they take anything? they didn't even touch me. i tripped because of these stupid cowboy boots. again, i'm sorry about throwing you out of the car. you seemed to enjoy it.

it was kind of fun. maybe his name really is j-o-h-n, but he changed it to j-o-n for show business. you know, j-o-n is a lot zippier. yeah, that's possible. how would you find out something like that? wait a minute. what am i thinking? i've got the entire yankee organization at my disposal. he'll dispose of it. that's right. see you later. so, jerome, i did a little snooping around for you. what'd you find out, lois? well, i talked to tim watley. yeah? and i asked him, "should jerry bring anything?" subtle. mm-hmm. and he said, "why would jerry bring anything?" let me ask you this. which word did he emphasize? did he say, "why woujerry bring anything?" or, "why would jerry bring anything?"

did he emphasize "jerry" or "bring?" i think he emphasized "would." forget this party. i don't want to go. hey. so where's my sneakers? that's what i want to know. i saw mom and pop this morning, but this afternoon the place was empty. everything is gone. mom and pop--pfffft-- vanished. all my sneakers are gone? i'm afraid so. and that's just the tip of the iceberg. i've been asking around. they didn't even have any kids. mom and pop aren't even a mom and pop? it was all an act. they conned us, and they scored big time. so mom and pop's plan was to move into the neighborhood, establish trust... for 48 years... and then run off with jerry's sneakers? apparently.

all right. that's enough of this. where you going? to the dixieland deli to pick up mr. pitt's parade pass. why does he want to hold a rope dernea woody woodpeer in the thanksgiving day parade?ope he finds his laugh intoxicating. so, george, what kind of promotional events are we talking about? well, i think we need more special days at the stadium, you know, like, uh... joe pepitone day or, uh... jon voight day. jon voight? the actor? [fingersnap] i make a motion that we have no more of these meetings that have been initiated by george costanza. i suppose if i'd suggested liam neeson day, you'd all be applauding me. i guessed stan herman's boomtown blues. what did you guess? um, it wnext stop, pottersville.

i knew that. go on, everybody knows that. when are they giving out the passes? after the music. [dixieland jazz plays] aw, man. taxi! taxi! hey! jon voight! jon voight! hey, listen. can i ask you something? listen. do you-- no jon voight day, huh? no. now i'll always have this doubt about the car. what, your jaw still hurts? yeah, it's all swollen. i think i chipped a tooth. you should have somebody look at it.

there are no dentists working the day before thanksgiving. going to the party? i don't know if i'm invited. there'll be lots of dentists there. you don't want to suffer all weekend. i gotta see a dentist. this is killing me. i'll take a chance. we'll go together. maybe i'll just meet you there. you don't want to go with me? maybe this guy meant not to invite you. how will i feel if i show up with an uninvited, unwelcome intruder? the way i feel when i go places with you? hey. did you find my sneakers yet? no. but i ran into somebody you might be interested in-- mr. jon voight, the actor. jon voight! did you talk to him? well, he was a little stand-offish. you didn't ask him about the car? no. his cab pulled away, but he did make an impression on me. look. what? his toothmarks. he bit me. jon voight bit you?

what is he, a vampire? it's justifiable. he thought i was going for his wallet. he left perfect imprints. that he did. you got that pencil with the bite marks? a trained eye can see whether you're driving jon voight's car. oh, please. wait a minute. wait, it's not that stupid. no, it's stupid. why? why is it impossible? they're both bite marks. you're showing up at that party with a chewed-up pencil and kramer's gnarled arm? it's worth a shot. yeah. kramer, want to go to the party together? jerry, look, i'm an invited guest. i can't be aiding and abetting some party crasher. excuse me. uh, dentist, are you a dentist?

hey, uh... buddy. are you a dentist? [george] these are the balloons? big deal. all i see is woody woodpecker. what, you got a problem with woody woodpecker? yeah. what is he, some sort of instigator? that's right. he's a troublemaker. hey, elaine, did you get my message? [shouting] what? i can't hear a word you're saying. i was stuck at the dixieland deli all day. my head's still ringing. where's tim? what's that, the empire state building? what? i can't hear you! oh. elaine, would you marry me? wh--i told you i can't hear a word. all right. forget it. hey, tim. how you doing? kramer, how you doing? watch--watch the arm. uh, tim, we don't want to bother you. it's o.k. what is it? let me show you something. tim, i'm gonna get going.

let me get your number. hey, is that jerry seinfeld? hey, he didn't come with us. the pencil. jerry. hey, tim. jerry. i didn't think you'd show. did you say, "jerry, i didn't think you'd show," or "jerry, i didn't think you'd show." elaine, hi. tim. i'm really glad you came. what? i'm really glad you came. uh-huh. elaine, i've been wanting to ask you... would you go out with me new year's eve? oh. thanks. what? what? let me ask you something. could you tell if teethmarks on somebody's arm matched teethmarks on a pencil? it's possible. roll up your sleeve. somebody bit you? well, not just someone. jon voight.

jon voight bit you? yeah, yeah. the pencil. hey, hey! get the pencil out of your mouth! you're destroying jon voight's teethmarks. that's jon voight's pencil? that's right. and i got his whole car downstairs. you bought his le baron convertible? ah-ha ha! yes! yes! yes, i'm the one. so you know jon voight? yes. i went to dental school with him. jon voight, the actor? no. the periodontist. can't this wait until monday? come by my office. just a quick peek. i'm in agony. o.k. sit down. it's this one here in the back. [bang hiss] ohh! you popped woody woodpecker! hey, who invited you anyway? you're a troublemaker. [nervously imitating woody woodpecker laugh]

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but this keeps it going. ♪ [ male announcer ] new gold bond powder spray. cool, dry, no mess. stay cool with gold bond. [man on tv] dry, no mess. looks like woody woodpecker is running out of air. in fact, he's collapsing. oh, those kids look pretty disappointed. especially that big kid up in the front. how old is he? [telephone rings] hello. is this jerry seinfeld? yes, it is. you don't know me, but i was at a garage sale, and this old couple sold me some sneakers they claimed belonged to jerry seinfeld the comedian. could i have the address of that garage sale? o.k., thanks very much. i found mom and pop. they're selling my sneakers. where are they? parsippany, new jersey! let's go. my car's in the shop. how are we getting to parsippany?

oh. jerry, these nosebleeds are starting again. maybe we should get you to a hospital. i ain't going to no bellevue. look at me, i'm falling apart here. [midnight cowboy theme plays] captioning made possible by columbia tristar domestic television captioning performed by the national captioning institute, inc. mary gshe also has asthma. so she sees her allergist who has a receptionist susan, who sees that she's due for a mammogram. mary has one that day. that's when she finds out she has a tumor.

she has a successful surgery and because her health provider has an amazing connected system, she has her life. i don't know what you have but i have kaiser permanente. kaiser permanente. thrive

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