as well as their current emotionality. here therapist alan cohen works th deb as well as their current what are you aware of in yr legsight now? it's kind of like they're clutching. they'rhoing their ground ok. now, if you were to let youlegs speak, rather than "they," "i"... uh-huh. speak as your legs. all right. i'm not too sure about this. wait ainute. not one morench. let's see where we're going here. ok. eat. a tool calle the empty chair technique helps clients find within themselves the influee of key people who have contributed to their personality and experience. so, for example, if someone is lling me about their ther and complaining to me about their mother,

i might have them visualize this mother in the chair tting opsite them d complain tthe mother and heighten the expience omplai. see if you can pay atntion to what feeling goes along with that. the fear comes up again. fear? mm-hmm. ok ou're going to squash me," is theeeling that comes along with that. ok. who's the "you"? who's going to squash you? mom, you're ing to squash me. ok, so n we ha a dialogue with mom. mm-hmm. , noput mom in thachair. yost right e you are. put moin that chair. before you speak to her, let urself s her. visualize her. ok. describe what you see.

in gestalt therapy, we srt with the present situation, and the present situation consists of what the pso presents as the patient and how they present themselves, so we're interested in the presenting of a problem. for example, i'm feeling depressed or i'm thiing about changing my job or my marriage isn't working out or i'm lonely or whatever. but 're also ierested in how the person esenen themselves. someone who presents him or herse as lonely and in the process of doing that is avoiding eye contact, is showing us not only at they're lonely, but how they keep themselves lonely by avoiding cot. mommy,his hurts. you're squashinge. i don't like this.

hurts. does she hear you? no. noshe doesn't hear you. no. ok. now, come over here. now, could you be a mother who doesn't hear her daughter? mm-hmm. ok. speak that mother. what's your-- what's your experience as this mother? honey, i'll be with yo in a little while. i've got the turkey in the oven. i'm juggling fiv or six things right now. i have to get th done. i ve company comin it needs to get ne. yeah. now, what's your reaction to this--to this little girl over here who's kind of asking for yo attention

when you're trying to do things? irritation and guilt. ok. we are looking to create new siations. we are looki torovide for the person e possibility to become aware of h they mainta an old status quo and also to provide the opportunity to try out new experiences and behavior and therefore, to t out new ways of experiencing themselves and the world. far thiprogram has concentrated on the differences between forms ofsychotherapy-- so yealt psychodynamic, with it just byg ingh tightening u and keeping it in? yeah. your father, i guess, would have approved that, did approve of it? thcoitbehavial, emphasizing chans in thinking d behavior. at ecould you haolyourself, then,

ind of sin "what a fo i am" well, i could just be ary at m, which i usuallam anyway. e gestalt,mphasing peri t bod and its way of expressing emotions. what are you aware of in your legs right now? it's kind ofike they're clutching. theye holding their ground. now, if you were to let your legs speak, rather than "they," "i"... uh-huh. eak as your legs. in practice,owever, most present-day psychotherapists integrate their methos of doing therapy, often borrowing from orientations other than their own in order to meet the particular needs of their patients. so a behavior therapist who is focusing on action but sees that the patient really needs to experience more emotionally n use methods of gesttherapy. the psychodynac therapist

might choose to use coite or behavioral techniqu to encourage patients to act in new ways in itsighest form, i would think of it more-- as an integrive approa to different rmof therapy, to be able to select from other for of thery sothing seemingly dictated by the case at hand. often an individual's relationship with soone el becomes central to the tra, so sometimes it makes sense to actually bring family members or significant others in the thera session. here, two actorssing ca histoes of real people pl wanda and harry jakes. wanda has already had sessions with the therapist. now for e rstime, they are meeting with the therapists a couple. i'm reallylad that you wanted to join us. what's going on? i don't know.

you don't ha to look at me like that. like w thisat i don't kn you don't have to look at me li what? how d look at you? the real reason harry agreed to be here is because the other night-- we don't have to go into it it's foolish. tell me what happened. it's unbelble. because i didn make-- thisim was the rk chops the way your mother want tm, d i told you the reason why, which i usually don't, so you must beoing something to me, soe be here what? [wan shs] what happenethe other night th t pork chops? very, very frequeny, coups will come in for trent

coing at they don't communicate to each other, and what they will then bring up are whee ter very trivi issues. the therapist in couplork operates under the assumption that the disagement about this surface issue is really a reflection of an underlying theme or an underlying agenda that's hidden, so that there's a ne to get to this hidden agenda and recognize that the trivial argument is really about something totally different. and typically, the hidden agendas involve two major issues in the vast majority of cases where there's couple problems-- the issues of control and the issues of love. the issue control is, who's in charge? who's e active one? who's the passive one? who's telling who what to do?

who's stepping on somebody else's freedom? the issue of love is really the issue of the absence of lo. it's--you don't care about me. you don't pay enough attention to me. you're not concerned about my welfare. the pork chops may very well be, "you don't care about me. "hers something that i like, "a you don't care to do it, which means you don't love me." holong have we bmarried? which means you don'w long me." have you known how they're supposed to be made? it was a littlehing, not a big th it's the same thing over a over again. and besides which-- i mean really, terms ohow impoant is iwith the pork chops, what it ally comes down to is... everything. dsn't make any diffence. if it's not the pork chops, it's something els i think ntially milyhepy

is a situation iwhich u e dealing with different indivials as they combine a stem. a faly does tou stag odevelopment, anyou have to understand what stage of lopment th famils at. you have to understand how they are eitr enmeshed, orre they in terms of bei inttwined too much and they are not allowing the members of the family to be their n person? st l th t nice soth. r prsu at work i don't need to be made to fe th i'm under e sameind of pressure at . and home should be a place that ia good place to come to. emotiofree? um...

unstressful. ok. sometimes emotions can be stressful. all right. so your wife has all the feelings inside of h, and she has emotions, and you nd it difficult to deal with them, and you feel sort of inadequate when she goes on cryg. no. i don't feel inadequate. i don't ever reay feel inadequate abouanything what i feel, as i sai is confused. the least little thing can set her off, and i frankly don't know what it is. ev today, as soon as i opened my mouth, the big sighing and the tears started, and we're off and ruing again, and this is wh happens at home. wandand harraren't a very uommon couple. wandand harry a combination

of an individual-- the sort of obsessive-compulsive type of personality th everything has to be so and with an awful lot of structure and who is actually very attracted to feelings, but ve scared of them at theame time. on the other hand, wanda has more hysterical features of the hyste rsonality, d shs all emio and elings. wh w happening s probably what ara the two them each othe wh w hapis now shing em apart. as d rivas-vazquez points o, co li t th p rivas-vazquez try geto, whathealls their urotic needs met. as one individual goes to individual thery now anthey work thugh their neurotic needs, they lose the need that they have for the other person. the relaonship might break because retiships are a balance-- often a neurotic balance, but nevehele a balance.

so one of the complicating faors in doing couples work is that the focus is not solely on the communication or the relationship, t there are personal issues that eh one has, and while the therapy is not trying to deal... terrib much with those pernal issues, it must recognize them. it must recognize that the limitations of how any individual reacts with a spouse is a function ofheir own personal limitatio, which might be the subject matter of individual therapy. that's what dr. rivas-vazquez suggesd for harry. g ashsees himgs abt in a solo session. if perhaps could undersnd you better so ian help r, the twof you could essentially understa wha ch oth iall about, and what needs.

she-hen pele are unhappy, we're talking about peop n having otiol needbeing met. it an intangible thg. it's... a lot tes pele don't know wl make tm happy. yeah. she wasn't toolear about exactly whould yeah. make h happy so that's something she has to figure out. perhaps ththree of us at a later date might be able to do that yb ok. at makesou happy? order. when everything about me is in order, then i can think clearly. it's like before i'm about to do an operation, having everything laid out exactly the way it's supposed to be and having everybody in place and having things done becausit such a precise.

funcon that... and that shod be carried over into everything. when my hous when everything i own, when the people in my life are... in order, then i can keep thinking clearly. it must be quite distressing to you, then, whenou see thisunt of emotion that are really lackinorder. sort of uncomftable. well, suppose emotions can be in order, also. ishat what... although harryakes is begin to open up, the gap between the jakeses is apparently very gat. in addition to recomnding that they continue les therapy, dr. rivas-vazquez will probably suggest that each continue in individual therapy, as well.

if i trusted peoe, or you gs, eugh to talk through things while i'm working them o, it would probly make life easier. in the group setting, each person comes with their own ki of prlem, bugroup therysetting, offers oppornitys to discuss and worthrough common issues as well. also offers a safe atmospher to take risks in expressing in, tory out newehaviors, and to give antoeceive honest feedback. in individuatherapy, e relationip between paent and therapist becomes impornt. in group thera, it's t cohesn of the group that is llel to at thereutiretionsh. that the grp in that nse becomes really an ideal living labatory for people who are having problems idealing with others, regardless of what these problems are.

delores mccarthy, a social worker, leads this group session involving her actual clients, some of wh she aleeindividual. one thg about a p is you c sehoclient will act wpele, indust repo sit. it real life for a client. they'll get a sense of shari, not being alone. they'tee ifnt. theythey get a senf hopehari, not being alone. hearing other peopl goough situation particularly peoe alth issues they can practice, maybt their couragup talk about something that's frightening. someone who' can be more open also to get feedback om peers. those things work st in a group setng. i have that independent streak. i n't want to risk giving up something to getel what would you risk here? i don't-- i'm t sure.

i mean, i-- i don't know exactly, but there is some fear of losing control. . i-- i'm trying-- i esone of the big fears is that i'll become too ndent, that i have such a need to be dependent on people that if i start... giving you a concrete example, i've talked about jen in the pt, d 're sort ofinvolv again, but i el like i'm afraid that because she's my oneutlet erms of beinop-- i n cry in front of he i can talk to her about anything. i can tell her what i'm feeling at any moment. i feel like i'm putting all my eggs in one bket. it's going to beoo muc for her to handle. i'm pulling myself back

d saying, "stop. don't call her. she doesn't need your burdens." group therapy can be of various therapeutc orientions. in this oup, delores mcrthy u a combinatn of approaches. my training is what would be called psychona orchoanalyti theayhat i in thugio, buveee ue l bypeonal appreso ychology-- ople ahere d thach otr. ace bk someby'chood. onf somethinstk sh that be done. e purpos thera have n eernces witheapele i was thinng over tkend i wanted to ask you all a queson. i felt liktwo diffent people most of e time-- st weei felte-- i was ying th emotionerson, this logical perso would any of you say i act like two different people?

do i ever... i'm curious ift's something i keep inside, and i worry out it melf, or do do it t outside? sometimes i use peop's react as mirrors to how i feel about myself, and i wonder. do you think you've shown those two ople he? i'm not sure if i oversimpfyt and make it two separate people or if it'sometng i've created in my head and it'sore of ee-flowing thing. i don't know if you've been two separate people more tn two different laye, becausi think thers a side of you that'very-- is a very good listener. re very emthetic. thk yore veryelpful logical,nd rational anybodytalking about mething at going on. then, i'll be honest with you, it surprises m we tald about your apartment,

your work situatio your partner and your old boyfriend. i really tught, god, you're going through so much. it surpris me that this was hpening because you uld lk about ur family-- because we all do here-- and you were so helpful and empathetic, and eninof that you had all of these other ki of micrises going on, because at's really what they are. they only seem to come out when they seem a little overwhelming to you. right. that's what my life has been like in the couple of years. it's just slowly tten to a poinwhere-- eemed like was manageabl then it became unmanageable. then be antic and crazed. that's when i ndered how i'm acting-- if i'm just keeping all this craziness inside.

that's what i wanted to know. i've been thinking about it. alof a sudden, i said at, it became re to me i see myself as two people. you coted, which one y comes here? i started wondering, does one of me come here do you think jean's description mas sense? it does make sense. yeah. on isical d thother in csi i fe like there one side that wanted to comout. it does most of the time. th's the s ve nevet out i don'really know how to do it. e imprsion i get is you chere, and you're always very rational and level. and though you talk about the problems you're suffering, it's like you've already put them at a distance. we're not experienci themith you. sometimes i wonder if i'm experiencing them.

most othe time. sometimes. what you bring here is a very calm, rational person. from what you're telling us, that's not how you are all the time. you're not letting us in on thother side. i can certainly entify with that. i think all of us have read more of what's really there than maybe you've-- not expressed, but shown. but it makes me realize how controlled yoreally are. that's what i'm afraid of. and because there are a lot of things going on-- i remember one time when you were describing youlife, it reminded of a smp-- st lots of roots intertwining and twisting around. the fact that you do hand all of is-- i ha may more confinc r abity to conol them all anouo.

one thinyou get escily in a group is aransrence theroup, not exactly in the sense ofomody is like their father, ther, brother, but a kind of trsference to the rld. the way they see the group is how they e the world. one o's sh fearful wl beearful about being th way in the group. paul w saying, "i want tohare m because we've been talking about whhe doesn't, how he keeps to himself and how that lims him. i feel like i've accomplished sething here and over the past year. but i'really--i'm real tentative aut it. you're afraid the ideas the group gives you won't stick with y? ah, that it's so new. sometimes after a great deal of talk, there are moments when the group falls silent and the thapist chooses not to ierne.

there's differt themeanings of silence, the group falls silent and one of my jobs is to read what the silence is. often whenheres a silence in gup, s roceg formatn ro nd time to lett sotilkg n somein s roceg formatn ro t of ten penking, istance, whpele afrd? it's op integng inrmatn, the that make what'spening be personal he it's op integng inrmwhen you werlkg out ents and ying about the ise of them understanding what you do, i s thkingut mylf and my parents

and whether they understand what i do and what i'm trng to do. i'm at a p ghnow where i don't know whethethey'll undersnd completely. there's one side of me trying to deal with that fact. there's another side of me that's saying i may be going by them souickly that i may not be for themdent to understand me. i dot know if you are er inow, youlldon' that to whr your parentand ot. i ill care a lot. that's the part that's the mos- that ieally am workg on nowith delores, is separating fromy mother, you know. ve done it physically, and now i need to find a to put it a good perspective emotional because i can't navite around it.

psycthapy is bary 1oo years old. psychologists and research are r eachuay searching patient or clien therapy this eort to mch therapist and ientation and setting with individual needs will doubtless continue. ptiong performed by the national caponing institute, inc. captioopyright 199 alvin h. perlmutter

funding fothis pgram was provided b..