millions of us. i'm ari. did i mention the below zero temperatures? get your holiday sweaters out. you know what i'm talking about. raw deal. democrats today are giving birth to a new way forward in the workplace. i'm luke russert. did you know we're just one of seven developed nations that doesn't guarantee paid maternity leave? >> yes, i did. plus, the tea party on ice. i'm krystal ball. has the fringe finally been frozen out? no icy reception here. it's always warm on "the cycle." thanks for joining us today. it's a pretty big day for washington. the house is poised to pass its first budget since president obama took office. that vote is scheduled for tonight at 6:00 eastern. debate on it is happening now, and it's right on par with the deadline for an agreement. wait a second. washington met a deadline?

wow, a christmas miracle two weeks early. santa, are you hearing this? and are you one of the 1% who actually approve of the job congress is doing? chuck todd in my very seat told us yesterday that our pollsters actually have the ability to find these people. unfortunately, we haven't had much luck so far. >> it seems like you want to punish everybody but not reward anybody. so how do you punish washington? >> it's part of the anger and frustration. there's not an easy way to do that. >> do you feel helpless? >> yes. >> i just want them to make it work. i don't know how to convince them to do that. >> joining us at the table once again today is one of buzz feed's best, their washington bureau chief, john stanton. always great having you with us at the table. house speaker boehner did something pretty significant yesterday. he doubled down on it today, basically lashing out against conservative groups who oppose legislation, in boehner's words, before they take a look at. let's hear what he had to say. >> most major conservative

groups have put out statements blasting this deal. >> you mean the groups that came out and opposed it before they ever saw it? >> yes, those groups. are you worried -- >> they're using our members and the american people for their own goals. this is ridiculous. listen, if you're for more deficit reduction, you're for this agreement. when groups come out and criticize an agreement that they've never seen, you begin to wonder just how credible those actions are. if you'll recall, the day before the government reopened, one of the people -- one of these groups stood up and said, well, we never really thought it would work. are you kidding me? >> this boehner is amazing. i have to wonder where this boehner was, i don't know, during the government shutdown. why now? >> i think a lot of it has to do with the fact that he's got paul ryan there. paul ryan is a figure within the party that people trust. all the conservatives trust him. it blunts the ability of

organizations like heritage action or club for growth to just say, well, john boehner's a rhino, he's not a real republican, definitely not a conservative. with ryan sort of being the quarterback, it opens it up a little bit for him. i think also his members came out of the government shutdown very badly beaten, and they got a lot of that momentum back because of the obama care website problems. none of them want to lose that. these sort of confluence of events have come together to allow him to become himself a bit and say things i think he's want to say for three years. >> i want to pick up on that because there's a quote you had in an article where a gop leadership aide said that, paul ryan was the jesus of the house gop conference. i got a two-part question here. part of the reason why boehner's gone so far, i totally agree with you, is because paul ryan, if you question his accolades

within conservative, it's blasphemy to a degree. and do you think that riled up boehner so much, sort of saying, you've got to be kidding me, this is paul ryan, a guy who we have voted on two of his budgets. and do you think this carries into 2014 on an issue like immigration? could you see, stop it, heritage, we're going to move a piecemeal bill you might oppose. >> on coming out in defense of ryan, that's absolutely true. this is the second time in a sense that ryan has come to his aid. first was with the fiscal cliff where he broke with eric cantor and mccarthy and voted with speaker boehner. i think this is, you know, boehner having his back, which he really needs to, you know. i think it remains to be seen if this translates further. it could, certainly. if they start to feel like they get this vote done, nothing happens, their members feel okay when they go home, they could try to use this as momentum to start moving immigration or other bills.

>> luke russert, what do you think on that? you have a little knowledge in this area yourself. >> you know, i think that there certainly could be some precedent for that if, in fact, these guys do go home and they're not just obliterated by their constituent groups. oftentimes, it's the people that are the most vocal are the ones who care the most and sort of the silent majority would in fact support an immigration deal is often more silent. these guys freak out with the phone calls. if boehner is willing to bypass the hsater rule -- we don't know what the count will be tonight. that could make a substantial difference in 2014, which we're already chocking up to a lame duck year almost. >> they're going to spend a month at home, which is always a problem. the guys go home and get beat up. >> because these outside folks rile up these groups. >> i'll tell you what, john, let me jump in. i know you're up in new york and i'm down here in d.c. i'm not only taking your seat, i've also been staying at your

apartment. but i see your jesus from your article and raise you when you look at this standoff with these groups. you think about the supreme art of war. is subduing the enemy without fighting. i wonder about applying that to this fight today because heritage is fighting and losing. i wonder if long term that makes them look weaker and less threatening to the republican members that they claim to keep in line. >> i think in the house, it could certainly. you're starting to see that a little bit with members. they came out of the government shutdown, and there were a certain number of members who were already starting to attack them and say these guys are no good for us. but you are seeing the opposite effect right now in the senate, which is sort of interesting. the senate republicans are now the ones that are saying this is a bad deal, we're going to side with heritage, you know, you've got john cornyn and others who

have tough primaries in front of the them and they don't want to get the conservative base rield up against them. >> what do you make of the fact there are so many incumbent republican senatorings who are for election this year who are facing tea party primaries? i think 8 out of 12 incumbent republican senators up for re-election in 2014 have a primary to the right. what does that say to you about the status of the tea party today? >> i think it's unclear right now. if you look at mcconnell and cornyn, i don't think they'll lose their primaries. if you look at pat roberts in kansas or thad cochran, they have legitimate races. in certainly hard-red areas can and hard-red states, the tea party is still very much alive. in other parts of the country, it seems their ability to influence republicans at the state level, statewide level at least, is diminished significantly.

>> i mean, look how well cuccinelli did in the state of virginia. >> the fact that mcconnell is leaning toward voting no on this deal is extraordinary. but the way in which these outside groups were quick to throw paul ryan under the bus was very similar to the way marco rubio was thrown under the bus for immigration reform. if you want to be a 2016 nominee and you're coming from washington, d.c., the impetus on you is to not do anything. sort of sit back and tow the conservative line, is it not? >> or you learn thele lesson fr paul ryan. rubio backed down. we've seen his stock with conservatives fall after that. whereas ryan has not at least at this point. you don't see him losing traction. he's in the apologizing. it's the mary landrieu way. she's never apologized for taking money. she gets beat up on it all the time. other democrats who take money get afraid and try to back away from that and often end up losing elections. >> double down. >> it's a tough line to walk.

john stanton, so great to have you at the table. we always enjoy it. and up next, republicans saving kids, fake sign language and the golden globes. how do we get it all in one spin? this is jeopardy. actually, it's "the cycle," and it rolls on for thursday, december 12th. before using her new bank of america credit card, which rewards her for responsibly managing her card balance. before receiving $25 toward her balance each quarter for making more than her minimum payment on time each month. tracey got the bankamericard better balance rewards credit card, which fits nicely with everything else in life she has to balance. that's the benefit of responsibility. apply online or visit a bank of america near you.

in the spin cycle today, let's try something a little different. alex, what are our categories? >> sports joes.

>> stop right there. we will take potpourri. first up, this group is holding a hearing that could affect millions of travelers. >> what is the fcc? >> that's it, krystal. boom goes the dynamite. they held their first of several mi meetings today on the ban prohibiting phone calls in the air. the new chairman calls the current rules outdayted and restrictive. there's a new ap poll that finds just 19% of americans support phone calls on a plane. so, you guys -- >> please leave if you support phone calls on a plane. >> it's more people than support congress, but it is pretty low. you're talking about one out of five people want more phone in their life. >> which is why the airlines actually make the decision at the end of the day. if they see that only 19% want this, it's in their best interest not to take it up. no matter what the fcc decides,

i don't think it will ever actually end up being the case. >> i have to say, i don't want them -- i'm not in that 19% that wants them, but once it comes to pass for everyone, i'm going to want to be on the plane where i can make my phone call. >> i'm a quiet car guy. i would pay money for a quiet cab. i could totally see airlines trying to have more premium charges. >> the quiet car makes me uncomfortable. >> i don't think you are thinking about this in a variegated way. it depends who's doing the call. luke russert, i don't want to put you on blast, but i've seen you on air and off. you have an incredibly maliffluous voice. >> i'm like a catcher talking to a starting pitcher. i speak very softly. >> better than toure. >> i'm a respectful individual of american society. that's being lost. >> i think we can all agree if it was toure on the call, none of us would get on the plane. >> i think that's the real question. is it a luke type voice in which

the more the merrier, and a lot of americans would agree, or is it something that at the cycle we call toure-ish, which is loud, overbearing and you want less of it? >> indeed. well said. up next, this bigroup passed a bill to put a drop in the bucket. >> what is the house of representatives? >> you got that right, luke russert. the house passed a bill wednesday that would take $126 million now meant to fund presidential nominating conventions to go toward paid yat -- pediatric research. democrats say it's an attempt for them to show politically they care about this issue, which they actually seem to be uninterested in replacing the money. >> there's actually a bipartisan

bill. what's interesting, it kind of falls in line with what eric cantor has been trying to do over the last year or so. which is remake the gop image from not being boogie man who hate children and different groups but who are caring. on its title, especially because the bill is named after this girl who passed away from cancer, the parents were involved. it's something that it looks good for them publicly. the public doesn't care about the minutia. this bill isn't going to go anywhere in the senate. the point here is i would argue the republicans win the messaging war. it looks good for them. it's not going to go anywhere. so democrats can complain about it. again, it sort of moves on and on and on. >> so you put it more in the pathetic waste of time category. got it. >> debatable. >> you're next, luke. >> okay. for 1,000, this gentleman had no idea what he was doing while on stage at a world leader's

memorial. >> who is the sign language guy. >> abby, correct. on the nose. the interpreter who was signing during nelson mandela's funeral service says he wasn't faking it but was hallucinating and hearing voices. he says he suffers from schizophrenia and had an episode during the service. i didn't realize he was faking t but jay leno did. >> did you notice later in the speech, watch what he did here. so obvious. >> ma dirks, ba would emerge as the last great liberator. >> see, that's -- that's when i knew. that was a red flag. >> now, people are laughing about this because nothing serious happened, but i myself am very uncomfortable with the fact that there is a schizophrenic individual hearing voices next to the president of the united states and a lot of other important world leaders. our own nbc investigative team has done a wonderful job digging into this. they found out that he was paid $85 for the day. the average sign language

interpreter gets paid around $120 to $165 an hour in south africa. someone went cheap. they got this guy, scary moment. no accountability. and this feeds into my fear of whenever our leaders go abroad, a la george w. bush and the gentleman who threw his shoe at him in iraq, there's always a risk when you go abroad. >> remember the white house party where the salahis came? this happens here in the united states. that's a good question. clearly this guy has some problems. still, how does he get into something like this? unbelievable. >> part of you has to admire the fact he's -- like, that's a very gutsy move to get up there on stage when you have no idea what you're doing. i mean, i'm certainly not agreeing with the fact that he did it, but it's pretty astonishing that you would put yourself out there like that. >> ari, i couldn't see you doing something like that, buddy. >> it's mental illness. it's scary. >> all right. and finally, 12 years a slave and american hustle received

seven nominations each for this award. >> abby, what are the golden globes. >> i feel like this game is rigged. >> ari, i think you won that one. and the golden globe nominations were held this morning with both films receiving best picture nods. "breaking bad" will face off against "house of cards" for best dramatic series. the golden globes are on nbc january 12th. i don't know about you, but it seems exhausting to even catch up with half the shows that are awards. i'm a big fan of "breaking bad." i haven't finished it yet. "house of cards" is also amazing. but i don't see movies very often. >> i watch my movies on my comcast xfinity on-demand, which is one of the best websites to give you that service. >> what's that website again, luke? >> but i will say, where's about

time? i actually went to the theater. great film. should have nominated for something. i like the golden globes because the folks are anti-oscars. the jokes are actually funny. you don't get rambling nonsense by some old guy talking about nothing for hours. it's a great, great program. >> but there's one thing we don't allow. it's rambling. >> i have a confession, which is i must be the only person on the planet who does not like "breaking bad." i went through two seasons waiting to see what the fuss was about. i had nightmares. i found it disturbing. >> it's not "the wire." >> be prepared to get killed on twitter after the show. >> go ahead. i'm ready. >> and abby, where are you on hbo's "girls"? >> i liked the first season. after that, it fell off. sorry. >> you like their early stuff is what you're saying? that's a very hipster answer. we're going to have to leave it there. up next, as we focus on family

during the holidays, here's a fact that may surprise you. only one in ten americans has paid leave through their employer. it's an important issue. one we want to spotlight. we're going to look at what some in congress are trying to do to change this, so stay with us. a subaru... ...are the hands that do good things for the whole community: the environment, seniors, kids, and animals. that's why we created the share the love event. by the end of this year, the total donated by subaru could reach 35 million dollars. you get a great deal on a new subaru. we'll donate 250 dollars to a choice of charities that benefit your community. it feels good to be a helping hand.

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cycling now, 1400 miles of ice. that's what old man winter is delivering less than two weeks before christmas arrives. lucky for us, the weather channel delivered paul goodlow to get us ready for what's ahead. >> that's right. in fact, the cold haair is alrey here. look at the temperatures right now. talking about 18 in buffalo. 25 in boston. 27 in new york city. again, the cold air also here in the midwest. all this is doing is setting the stage for our next winter storm,

which is literally hours away. right now, look at the water vapor imagery. it's like an mri or x-ray of the atmosphere. this is part of the energy from the storm. also, energy coming in from the pacific. they'll merge and bring us more of a wintry mess across the middle of the country, then pushing to the northeast and new england. right now all we're seeing is snow and rain here in western texas and southern mexico. as we head towards this time tomorrow, we'll see a lot more rain across texas. dallas, no more freezing rain and sleet and ice for you. more of a cold rain. also for oklahoma city. then we get towards kansas city to st. louis. we could see a little wintry mess there. maybe icing occurring there. chicago, snow showers start for you on friday. they linger into saturday. st. louis, you change over to snow showers. right here across the ohio valley, we're going to see a decent swath of snow. more snow for cleveland and detroit, toledo, pushing on towards pittsburgh and new york. boston, snow starts on saturday, gets at times heavy saturday night and lingers into sunday. depending on when our new coast tallow will develop, we could

see perhaps just a change over to rain in new york city, maybe even in boston. we're still watching a decent swath of snow. and football on sunday, giants are at home. the steelers are at home. and cleveland is at home. yes, there will be snow falling again on those games as well. so meanwhile, across the midwest, you're seeing this swath here in the pink and purple. that's five to eight inches. two to three around st. louis. meanwhile, here's the bull's eye of the heaviest snow. just north of new york city and to the west of boston. some areas 6 to 12. would not be surprised to see perhaps more than a foot of snow in the interior of the northeast and new england as we head through sunday night and into your monday morning. back to you guys. >> all right. thanks much, paul. now we turn to what has been an icy reception in congress until today to a very important issue for millions of families. senator gillebrand has introduced the family and medical insurance leave act. the bill dubbed the family act would be a badly needed update to the 1993 family medical leave

act. it would establish a paid leave insurance program and allow people to take paid time off when they have a baby or get sick or have to take care of someone who is ill. you know, the kinds of things that come up in the life of every working american. and yet, just 12% of the work force has paid leave through their employer. the u.s. is one of only seven developed i developed nations that do not guarantee paid maternity leave. some of you may recall how it works here on "the cycle." >> so she joins us on the phone from the hospital. yes, she's that dedicated. hey, krystal. i hear you have news for us? >> we welcomed to the world today lowell maxwell. eight pounds, four ounces. >> wow. >> i told him he needed to come before the show so i could make sure and do this interview and

provide you with an update. >> yeah, that was literally me right after having the baby. i was back to work the next day. just kidding. i took good time off. much appreciated. joining us now is the director of work and family programs at the national partnership for women and families to help us understand this new bill. thank you for joining us. >> i'm so glad to be here, krystal. thanks for having me. >> let's start with explaning why do we need this update? >> we're one of seven countries in the world that does not offer paid maternity leave to new mothers. one of the only developing countries that doesn't have paid sick leave for serious illnesses or even paid paternity leave for new fathers. we are far behind the times. frankly, our public policies really have not kept up in any way with what working families need today. we're in a time when women are half the work force. women are increasingly the breadwinners in their families. and women are also the caregivers in their families. yet, most people do not have any time that they can use to take care of a new child, to take

care of a sick or dying parent or loved one, or even to stay home or be able to take care of themselves when they have a serious health condition. about 40% of workers don't even have a single paid sick day, much less the long-term leave that the family act would provide. >> and this is not some sort of radical socialist idea being thrown by america's adversaries. we're actually very far behind in the world. i want to put up a graphic that shows you where we rank. if you look at all these countries without paid time off, we're with swaziland lesotho, papaua new guinea. not exactly the company you would keep when talking about american exceptionalism. >> not at all. the most economically competitive countries in the world have these programs in place now. it is a matter of global competitiveness. we really need to update our policies. in fact, there are studies that show that women have added

significant percentages to the gdp, and we can only do more if we can protect the ability of people that take care of themselves and their loved ones come back to work, earn higher wages over time, save for their children's college, save for their own retirement. it's crazy the way that we expect families to be able to survive when there are so many competing demands, both in terms of work and in terms of family. and in fact, we'll all be better off when people have income, when they have job security, they're able to spend money in their local businesses and able to help grow our economy here at home. >> yeah, so why isn't this a more bipartisan issue on the hill? >> that's hard to say. i can't speak for what's in the minds of lawmakers, but i can tell you that among the public, this is not a democrat issue, this is not a republican issue. these policies have the overwhelming support of voters regardless of political affiliation in every corner at country. 86% of voters in a survey we did after the 2012 elections said they wanted congress and the president to deal with and address these policies,

including family and medical leave insurance, just like the family act that was proposed today. and in fact, there are business leaders that are standing up in support. the vice chairman at morgan stanley spoke very eloquently at the press conference today. there are people across the country that are hungry for this policy and hungry for lawmakers to understand the struggles and the challenges that working people face, the challenge to be a good worker and be a good family member, the challenge to contribute to the community, and really the desire to get ahead on the job as well as take care of the home front. >> well, and this argument for paid leave stems so much further than just being the right thing to do. we're talking about added benefits for employees like productivity and effectiveness. talk to us about that. >> absolutely. all of the studies that are out there, including a study of california's family leave insurance program, which was put into place ten years ago and has been by every measure very successful for families, for the workers themselves and the children and the elders that are

getting care and for businesses. it shows improved or neutral effect on productivity or improvements on productivity. it keeps people employed. it prevents employers from having to have that constant churn of finding and training new employees only to lose them when something comes up. it's also a cost savings for businesses who are able to coordinate their own benefit when is they offer those benefits with the family leave insurance program that the state administers. it really is a win/win. it's a win for workers, a win for their families, a win for businesses and a win for the community. >> and i think that win for businesses part is so important. a lot of times those are the folks who are standing in the way of making some of these changes. also, this act is not just to benefit women. this is really about families and it's about men too, right? >> absolutely. so i mean, women are -- do continue to be our primary caregivers for both children and elders, but we see a growth, a tremendous growth in men who want to be able to do the right thing, want to be able to take care of their babies when their

babies arrive, want to be able to take care of their families in a way that is more than just providing a paycheck. in fact, men today experience higher levels of work life conflict than women do because they are trying to change the way that they are being and interacting and yet our public policies and culture really don't allow that in the way that would be best for everybody. so this is, it's about helping women to advance in the work force. it's about changing the culture so that both women and men can be seen as both caregivers as well as breadwinners. >> all right. vicky, important stuff. thank you so much. >> thank you so much for having me. and up next, the republican darling stuck in the middle of the brewing tea party gop showdown. [ woman 1 ] why do i cook?

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earlier we heard speaker boehner repeatedly blast conservative groups who were critiquing a budget deal they didn't even look at. it seems the gop establishment may finally be fighting back against the fringe. in 2010, south carolina governor nicki hailey was a tea party darling, writing the establishment uprising into office. now she's facing 2014 re-election challenges from the right and from the left. joining us now is a man who knows a thing or two about south carolina, jimmy williams. jimmy, i hear your bowtie was on backwards. is everything all right? >> he looks great. >> no, no, no. that just shows you that nick has no class. he has no idea what he's talking about. >> you always look wonderful. you wrote a pretty scathing article about governor hailey for "u.s. news." this is what you wrote. democrats hate her and now the dwindling tea party is beyond furious with her. i've been home the last three

weeks for the holidays, and not a single republican i've talked to is going to vote to re-elect her, not one. jimmy, that's pretty rough. how much trouble is she really in, and does this maybe represent a bigger problem within the gop? >> well, let me give you an example. i was looking at property down in charleston. it's a coastal island off the peninsula. i was with a gentleman who had on the back of his car, impeach obama, i hate obama care. i said, what do you think of the current governor? he was showing me property. he goes, i hate her. i said, are you going to vote for shaheen? he said, i won't vote. that's what's going on down in south carolina right now. i didn't find a single republican that said they were going to vote for her, nor were they going to vote for vince, the popular state senator, a democrat, who almost beat her the last time. so listen, she has managed somehow to make everybody in the

state pretty upset, except for a lot of the tea party. and then she kind of skrud that up by going out and endorsing lindsey graham. here we are. what we are finding is that nicki hailey is remarkably popular in 49 states, none of which is south carolina. >> where it matters. >> you point out in this article people forget that she only won election as governor by four points, but going back to that lindsey graham piece, senator in south carolina a long time, facing a serious, i would say, challenge from the right, from the tea party flank. if hailey's so unpopular there, i mean, does it actually help lindsey graham that she's saying nice things about him? >> well, what she's doing is she's now trying to go to the middle. again, remember, the problem with mitt romney back during the last presidential election was no one could trust him. now while i will say this, mitt romney did endorse hailey when she ran for governor. then she endorsed him. there's still a saccharin taste left in a lot of republicans, especially a lot of tea partier's mouths.

they don't like the fact that she's shifting for political purposes. they like purists. they like the idea that you're going to be with them at all times. listen, republicans in south carolina for the most part get that you're going to play politics. so do democrats. but the tea party groups down there, they hate it. they despise it. so now that they've seen her tacking to the middle, they can't trust her. that's, again, i think her bigger problem. if you're losing 35% of your base, then you have a bigger problem, especially if you're not going to get any democrats. >> jimmy, as you north korknow, huge fan of charleston. beautiful weather nine months of the year, beautiful people, some of the best food. i love charleston. oddly enough, from reiding your article and doing research, it seems i love charleston more than the governor of south carolina because she wanted to allow for the port of savannah, georgia, to be -- i want to read a quote from the state. quote, south carolina house

republicans and democrats alike blasted governor nikki hailey for vetoing their res louis expressing displeasure with a state agency move to clear the way for the deepening of georgia's port of savannah. they vetoed that by a 111-1 vote. nikki hailey got some money from georgia lobbyists and actually went against her own state, the state house disapproved of it, 111-1. stupid is as stupid does, jimmy, but what the heck is going on there? >> listen, i wrote this in my opinion piece. she only got $15,000 at that fundraiser down in georgia. if you're going to sell out your state -- that's not even going to feed the meter downtown in charleston. she's got to do better than that. i understand the politics. i get people playing politics. i'm not offended by that. i worked in that building for seven years. what i don't get is when you go

with your neighbor. i don't get that. that makes no sense. it's not like she had a huge amount of base down in charleston to begin with. charleston tends to be a little more artsy, a little more moderate, per se. but there's still a good number of tea partiers down there. then she goes and says, you know what, i don't think we should dredge the number one most important river in the entire state. i think we should dredge nathan diehl's river next door. that's probably better. again, all politics is local. i think that she is not at all thinking from the perspective of what matters in each regional band of the state. the state is made up of three parts. the low country, the midlands and upstate. that doesn't mean you don't want them to vote for you. by going with georgia and going with savannah, she pissed off the entire low country. that was just not smart. >> it's simple. if you can't govern for your people, they're not going to like you much. >> one other thing quick. the rga has to defend a lot of

incumbent governors next fall. maine, florida, michigan, all battleground states. do you think for a second they want to spend a time in south carolina? no, they don't. they better watch out. she's in big trouble. >> important point to end on. >> fascinating stuff, jimmy. thank you as always. up next, the one little word that is the hardest to say. no. if you are overwhelmed with work, kids, family, friends, and holiday obligations, you do not want to miss our next conversation. ♪ [ male announcer ] if we could see energy... what would we see? ♪ the billions of gallons of fuel that get us to work. ♪ we'd see all the electricity flowing through the devices that connect us and teach us. ♪ we'd see that almost 100% of medical plastics are made from oil and natural gas. ♪

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and we're back with a new study on second-hand stress at work. you're telling me. it's about how your colleagues, especially managers, operating in a frenzy all the time can make those behaviors and feelings contagious. i don't know about you, but there are some people like this in my office that i just can't stand. no need to name names, of course. whether it's, oh, i don't know, because they just had another baby or their big, powerful family has a lot of able gaobli, or they can't even be bothered to show up onset, i'm looking at you, ari and toure. they won't stop dumping their stress on you. now suddenly the whole office is infected with that same anxiety and resentment. yeah, i said it. it's the kind of attitude and even tactic employed by some managers to hold their position of power. in fact, our next guest says as fierce competition leaks from

our professional to personal lives, all of our relationships are under siege for those looking to trample over your good nature. bullying, it turns out, isn't just for kids. joining us now talking about how to stand up for yourself is jill brooke, the author of "the need to say no." jill, thank you so much for coming on the program. >> pleasure to be here. we're so programmed to say yes, aren't we? >> yes, we are. >> and there's power in saying no. >> there is, indeed. there's a lot in your book, but one thing i found interesting, there's a lot of employees who try to bring their bosses smart ideas and oftentimes are dismussed. you write, quote, the bosses want the status quo guarded and will sabotage people who -- bosses like to be admired and flattered. very few are like ronald reagan who proudly hired people who were smarter than he was. i think this is a bigger problem now because you have a lot of young folks in the work force

who grew up in a totally different technological era than many of their superiors. they try and say, hey, why don't we do things in a digital manner here? why don't we change this? why don't we change that? you're sort of swept to the wayside saying, no, no, no, this is the way it's always been done here and that's the way it will continue. for the young person in the office who might want their boss to take a new look at something, what do you suggest? >> this feels very personal luke. >> not at all. i speak for the generation. >> well, there's a character called sitting bull. what that means is that you have to sometimes observe who you're working for and figure out what works for them and what doesn't. and you have to wait. you have to find their strengths. you have to find their weaknesses. and then you apply a strategy. certain bosses want to be agreed with, no doubt. but what you can say, i can understand what you're saying. however, what about this. too often young people literally feel so entitled and think their

ideas are so great will say, we have to do this. >> you hear that? >> that's the other side of this argument. >> you want to know what? they don't have the experience. they're not sitting where the boss is and understanding all the things that they're the thi that they're having to delegate, as well as deal with. so you have to make someone feel safe before you offer whatever advice you want to give, whether it's good, great or so-so. about saying no is good people are often guilted or bullied into saying yes to many things. these bulls in the bull pen of life are trying to get people to do things for them so this way they can do other things. it's really important to recognize that by saying yes to things and being accommodating, it is robbing you of the time to think, perfect, and most importantly, practice, which is the raw material of success.

in today's economy, you can't be just good. you have to be great. you have to offer the good ideas and you have to be aware of all the strategies to succeed. often that means cherry picking what you say yes to. because that is the only way you're going to be great at anything. >> talk to us more about office bullying, the one i see most often is not necessarily visible. it's when people -- >> you're so good at this. >> talk about you behind your back or go to your boss and say something that isn't true to make themselves look better, how do you handle a situation like that? >> because of fierce competition, many people have become so darwinian, so they diminish someone else, thinking it elevates themselves. the truth, is you have to manage that. the best way to do that is using e-mail traffic. i understand you feel this way about this particular project,

but here are some suggestions. another way to deal with people who gossip is what i call be like the brad pitt bull or the sandy bullock. what that means is using charm as a weapon. when people are gossiping or saying what did you think about this guy? you can use google and say, did you hear about this study? i thought this was interesting. so you're not necessarily scolding, but what you can say instead is using information as a tool to be part of the game, but not necessarily participating in things that you know as far as integrity are not okay. really, it's about fear versus love and have a lot more faith that we should build teams with like-minded people that share our values and the ones we have to deal with who are not necessarily good, you know, or honorable, you still have to

deal with them. but you have to realize that as a weapon, bullies respond to resistance. >> indeed. >> so don't say yes, say no. silence is a sound. >> jill brook, thank you so much for coming on the show. up next, fonts from abby on the pope's message of charity. she might just convert to catholicism. a trip down that road, next. and ah, so you can see like right here i can just... you know, check my policy here, add a car, ah speak to customer service, check on a claim...you know, all with the ah, tap of my geico app. oh, that's so cool. well, i would disagree with you but, ah, that would make me a liar. no dude, you're on the jumbotron! whoa. ah...yeah, pretty much walked into that one. geico anywhere anytime. just a tap away on the geico app.

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you've probably heard by now

the "time" perp of the year for 2013 is pope francis. we featured that yesterday. i couldn't agree more with this pick. it's uplifting, positive, this man has changed the tone and perception, even the focus of one of the largest institutions in the world. it's spilled into broader humanity. this is a man who doesn't sweat the small stuff. he skipped the red shoes of gold and rocks a simple iron cross around his neck. he thinks with compassion. he doesn't focus on how things were done in the past but how he can make them bettner the future. and he's able to do all of this while still respecting doctrine. it's no secret, even myself with mormon roots, identify with him. so i want to focus on something rather poignant that caught my attention a few weeks ago. it wasn't because it was a different idea, but rather because of the way the pope was able to frame it.

in his "joy of the gospel," he said we do not live better when we flee, hide, refuse to share, stop giving and lock ourselves up in our own comforts. such a life is nothing less than slow suicide." the idea that society should be reduced to focused on economic growth at all costs. it's a discussion we've been having for a long time. since the beginning of the great recession, one of the common things is growing wage and wealth and equality in america. it found its way into the 2012 presidential election, we'll never forget the 47%. and has continued into our current debate around a higher minimum wage. but the pope has taken a nuance to it that's been lost in some of the other conversations. he's able to talk about how unrestrained capitalism leads to self-preservation and green. he critiques the idolatry of

money, but sorry, rush limbaugh, he is not a marxist. this not an attack on free markets themselves but rather on a cultural obsession with money that distracts from the poor. folks, any rational conservative agrees with that. the pope said it best when he said, how can it be that it's not a news item when elderly homeless person dies of exposure, but it is news when the stock market loses 50 points? let's not forget the original sin stems from greed, a reflection on our basic human nature. we as a society should promote free markets, recognizing the temptation of greed. it's about ensuring our land remains the land of opportunity and decency, where there are no rungs missing from the economic ladder. i give thanks that this new pope is a refreshing force in the world debate and not someone who lives in the past. that does it for us.

let's go to someone always in the hear and now. take it away. >> you got that right. thank you, abby. good afternoon, afternoon. it is thursday, december 12. and you know it's a fun day right here in washington, d.c. when the speaker of the house is channeling his inner john mcenroe. ♪ >> today we'll consider the bipartisan budget act. >> this is not a draw. >> it's not everything we wanted. >> it's the final surrender of the house republican leadership. >> i take my fair share of criticism from the right and left. when you criticize something you have no idea what it's criticizing. >> i thought it was a little strange. >> are you kidding me? >> what will you say? >> read the deal and get back to me. >> why conservatives wouldn't goat for this is beyond any recognition. >> republicans never miss an opportunity to m