i'm toure. it stayed away from this table which is a good reason to keep ari at a safe distance. >> here he is revealing blow by blow conversations, confidential conversations he had with the president and his other top national security advisers. these are some explosive statements that he has made about the president. this is not some outside critic. >> you have to take the full picture here, john. i would say on that matter, i think the american people expect that their commander in chief listen to all of his advisers, civilian and military, when it comes to discussion and debates about matters of war and peace and decisions that affect the lives of our men and women in uniform and that's how it should be. >> was gates wrong when he said the president didn't believe in

his own afghanistan policy? >> it is absolutely the case as many have reported that it is well known that the president has been committed to achieving the mission of disrupting, dismantling and defeating al qaeda while ensuring that we have a clear path for winding down the war which will end this year. these are not separate issues. >> description was personal. the president can't stand karzai. >> i wouldn't agree with that. issues are not about personalities. they're about policies. >> jay carney gets grilled by the white house press corps over a tell-all book. rarely does a cabinet member air out dirty laundry on two competing administrations they served, one of which is still in office. we're talking about former defense chief robert gates who handled the iraq and afghan wars for bush and obama and releases his memoir next week. previews have leaked and high ranking insider look comes at a crucial time for afghanistan and

president obama. washington is threatening the zero option pulling out all u.s. support troops if the afghans don't sign a security deal protecting our troops. to date more than 2,100 u.s. troops have been killed there. after the troop surge, gates writes as i sat there the president doesn't trust his commander. he can't stand karzai. doesn't believe in his own strategy and doesn't consider the war to be his. for him it's all about getting out. he was skeptical if not outright convinced it would fail. gates attacks obama's leadership and commitment to the war while others say privately questioning a strategy as commander in chief is not necessarily a bad thing. gates also accuses obama's national security staff offing my micromanaging and mettling. gates says biden has been wrong on foreign policy for 40 years. hillary clinton is willing to say anything to win an election. in short, few in washington were left unscathed. gates had a few choice words for congress calling it ugly,

uncivil, incompetent, hypocritical, egotistical and thin skinned. as for george bush who first nominated him to head the pentagon said he made his bed and would have to lie in it. how much long-term impact would this have? a lot to cover. if you felt this way, why not resign back then. i'm going to vent for a minute. not just because i feel like this is very much in poor taste but i look at the man who is releasing this book, someone i think many people including myself has viewed as a statesman. someone we very much respect who has crossed the aisle to serve a number of presidents. he reminds me in a lot of ways of my dad who also served as a republican for president obama as ambassador to china. i could never imagine him unleashing a book talking about the intimate conversations he might have had with hillary clinton or president obama. so what gives here? it seems like it really is about making a buck or two. >> it's don't think it's that. he may make a buck or two

because this looks like it will be a real interesting book. the headlines will offer plenty of material for attack ads when hillary clinton runs for president if joe biden runs for president and you pull out some of these sentences and they would be devastating. events about everything. it's as if he's been this calm presence, this statesman-like character all these years and inside there was this boiling passion and now he's set it all down. i don't think it will really hurt anybody in the long run except in that narrow sense of here's a sentence, there's a sentence, pull it out, stick it in an attack ad. >> you were a speech writer for jimmy carter. what do you think of people being in the white house and then coming out and writing about their experiences? >> i think you shouldn't do it until your guy gets re-elected. obama isn't going to run for anything anymore. i think it sort of a little bit within the acceptable range.

but it is exceptional. it is something that rarely happens. it happened with reagan and several others with his own children writing books dumping on him. i think this is about gates himself. this is not like his other books. this is him talking from the heart. when he talks about how obama didn't believe in his own afghanistan policy, he's basically recording what went through his mind at the time. there's no evidence except for that that obama didn't believe in his course. but obama took it easy. no. obama always thinks in a nuanced way and of course there were no courses in afghanistan that were going to be good. it was all bad choices. all bad choices. >> you know, rick, when you mention the distinction here, i

think it's important to understand what you're saying. there are a lot of books that come out as we know and a lot of memoirs. i think what's striking about this one and some of the others we've seen, paul o'neil's comes to mind they go into high-level private meetings and go beyond using private record and expose more of the secret record. yet i wonder as we look at this, he want through the processes and worked with pentagon on this material but there's clearly a lot in here that's from those high-level previously confidential meetings and yet i'm not hearing any charges or calls for him to go to jail over telling us about these secret meetings which is a little different than the way some leakers are treated. >> we are now used to hearing about everything. we've got snowden. we've got all of the state department cables that were

released. weird things go on in private and behind closed doors in high-level meetings. people say things. they say things that they might not want everybody to hear. but i think everyone is going to survive this. is there anything really all that shocking about any of this? i don't think so. >> it isn't productive. that's another good question to ask. >> dealing with substance of the book, to me it seems natural and even healthy that there would be a tension between military top brass and civilian leadership and obviously gates has served in a number of administrations and this book in particular he talks about his disagreements with two administrations. how much of this tension and this rub and these disagreements are just normal and natural and how much is something else? >> it's all pretty much normal. and gates -- it's interesting. gates writes -- we hear the

headlines. we hear bits and excerpts. the only actual piece of the book i read was the excerpt in "the wall street journal." it suggests it's worth reading. it's not a hit job. the way gates writes about the emotional impact it had on him to be with the troops and to visit the troops and to see their suffering, he writes that in his other white house jobs he was basically behind a desk. all very distant. it became very real to him and he's become a doubter about war in general. if you read some of the things he said, it's almost as if he's become a passivist. he has come to appreciate how just how awful war is. >> wouldn't you want a commander in chief who is as circumvent as possible? wouldn't you be afraid if the person was lacking in the

strategy and what we're doing with these men and women? >> you would, of course. that's the way jfk was after he got burned at the bay of pigs. we do better with presidents who doubt the ethicacy of war than the ones who like to rush into it. >> how problematic do you see this being for hillary clinton who still has a future that she's concerned about and obviously he opened up about here being very political in terms of her decision making when it comes to iraq. >> it's problematical for her. problematical for her last time. she's a little -- she has a problem with the democratic base because of having been for the iraq war. we don't know whether she was for it or against it now. we can take it for granted that hillary is going to be attacked about this. that was true before too. before we heard this. i don't know does he actually say she would do anything to get

elected or is that a gloss on what she says? >> is there a politician who wouldn't say anything to get elected? >> i don't think they would say anything. >> lots. >> i think for hillary clinton, i mean, that's a particular question that people have about her and her authenticity. i was wondering on another serious matter, as a facial hair connoisseur, would you weigh in on the jay carney beard? >> i love it. >> "the cycle" rolls on for wednesday, january 8th, 2014. i got back to doing what i love. that's my daughter. hi sweetie! gotta dial it back a little bit on the rock climbing. one weekend can make all the difference.

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welcome back. it is another afternoon where the big story is weather but it is about to change. it's still cold this afternoon. you know that. but the temperatures are slowly moderating. the polar vortex, whatever that may be, is, yes, headed back to the north pole where we do think it belongs and above average temperatures aren't far behind. let's start in chicago where today's high is a balmy 15 degrees. the weather channel's reynolds wolf is there. >> reporter: we're in the deep freeze as you mentioned, but a secret. it was worse a few days ago. for our friends across america, good people of chicago had temperatures that were record setting on monday. very, very brutal cold in place on tuesday. so knowing that, this morning we have conditions in single digits in many places. it's below the freezing point but everything is relative. it's better, right?

roadways are in good shape despite the snow. you see in a few places. you could moon walk out here as conditions are nice on the sidewalks. if you look at the river though, that's a different story. let's ease on over here. you take a look and you notice there is plenty of ice out there. >> thank you, reynolds. that was not the moon walk. >> wow. >> fact check. >> toure will do a demo later. >> warmup is coming despite what we're going to show you. dylan, take it away. >> totally frozen over. mother nature shut it down. we certainly are seeing improvements. we are still noticing a lot of black ice on the roadways making the commute slow this morning and also several flight delays and cancellations because of the deep freeze that we're feeling here in the midwest into the northeast and even all of the way into the south. but that polar vortex we've been talking so much about is finally lifting off to the north.

we are going to see some improvements. today is really the last cold day and then we should start to maybe even get up to freezing here in minneapolis by the time we get to friday. >> this is katie tur reporting from new york standing on lake ontario. look at how cold it is. you can see those freezing waves crashing over the lake wall or sea wall if you will. over here you can see just how frozen they've all become. waves crashing over freezing instantly over there. up to the north of us, it's bad. lake-effect snow 50 miles north of us in watertown and in adams dumping two inches an hour up there. should continue throughout the day. they can't even measure how much snow they've gotten because there's just too much wind. 50-mile-an-hour winds up there that have been blowing everything around. back out here in oswego, not too bad right now. windy and chilly. better than it was yesterday. >> all right. thank you both. the lodge frigid might maynight

over for our nbc weather team right now. it is only january 8th. my mom's birthday by the way. 70 days until the official start of spring. that means anxiety is in the forecast for millions of americans who don't have a warm place to go. it's not just the homeless. at last count about 9 million americans were enrolled to receive heating assistance including the elderly and children. but in recent years, washington has given them the cold shoulder. now a bipartisan group in congress is turning up the heat on president obama to bring the money back. that coalition is led by democrat peter welsh of vermont. congressman welsh, thank you for coming back to the show. >> thank you. >> congressman, let's start with the history here. this heating assistance, the funds for this program have been cut by 30% over the past few years. if this is a popular program and has bipartisan support, why have we seen such dramatic cuts? >> it's just an indication of the wicked budget pressure and where the mantra around here is any cut is a good cut.

in your introduction you mentioned it includes children and elderly, the fact is 90%, 90% of the households that receive fuel assistance have a child, an elderly person or a disabled person. 20% of the households have injured veterans. we're talking about folks who are totally unable to get a job, totally unable to control the temperature of the weather and totally unable to control the price of home heating fuel. this is basic decency that applies to folks that live in my district and peter king's district, pike fitzpatrick's district in cutting fuel assistance by 30% is just a huge and unsustainable cut that inflicts enormous pain on people with no ability to come in out of the cold. >> you have been on this particular issue for year in 2010. you called this a vital safety net for low-income families. and yet any time you mention safety net, there seems to be republicans ready to block and

cut that issue. even though studies prove they are successful. how do you sell the concept of another safety net to republicans who are outside of new england? >> you know, you just ask them to go knock on doors in their own district to people who are not able to turn the heat on. there's a philosophical morality argument we're having here that starts with this notion that if you have a problem, it's your problem. the fact is that some people, particularly the elderly, kids, disabled, they don't have a capacity to control what the temperature is. you know what? republican or democrat, whatever your macro economic policy is, we have to help them. it's that simple. in vermont we have 28,000 folks who are getting home heating assistance. the state has put 9 million dollars, that's a lot of money in vermont into fuel assistance because of the cutbacks we've received from the federal government and we had bipartisan support in vermont to do it because it's what you do in your neighbor is freezing. >> that's exactly right. congressman, before we let you

go. i want to get your thoughts on extending unemployment benefits. obviously it passed a key hurdle yesterday in the senate. still the outcome is unknown. how do you see this playing out especially in the house where it will likely be very dicey? >> it's tough in the house because that point about the safety net, my colleagues do believe that austerity is the path to prosperity and they think cutting unemployment benefits or saving money by cutting low-income heating assistance is somehow going to boost the economy. no evidence to show that. europe had bad experience with it. the bottom line here is that we can acknowledge that if you provide help and extend unemployment benefits, it mitigates the problem. i like to see us raise the minimum wage and agree on infrastructure improvement to spend money doing that. it's a good time to do it with low interest rates and putting folks back to work.

with unemployment we should be trying to have a jobs creation program that we can pass together. >> congressman peter welsh, always great to have you. thank you for all of the good work you're doing. let's bring into mini spin. we talked about weather and freezing temperatures and as i was walking home, my short walk from the subway to my apartment here in the city, it was so cold to the point where it was painful. what kept going through my mind is how many don't have somewhere to go tonight. how many don't have a roof over their head tonight. if you look at the numbers, more than 46 million who live in poverty. more than 600,000 americans who don't have a home and this is something we often think about when it's freezing or over the holidays when we talk about it a lot. this is something we should talk about all year-round. something we should be focused on and thinking about opportunity. how do we give these folks a job? how do we give them a purpose? a reason for them to get up in the morning and to provide for their family to put a roof over their head.

>> there's a reason to think about it now. it's the 50th anniversary of the war on poverty that lbj declared. we've had some success in the war on poverty. 26% of americans reduced to 16% of americans. there's another side active and fighting a war on minimum wage, a war on unions and that decreased the amount of power that the little guy in this country has. >> we always have this question about where does poverty come from and on the left we say it's because of structural forces and income inequality and on the right it's personal choices. there's new research that shows the driving overwhelming driving force is income inequality. contributing 5.5 percentage points to our poverty rate since 2007. >> there are two big differences. it was an era where democrats used the term war as a positive form force. war on poverty.

later war on drugs. i can't think of any politician who would use war that way which shows you how much has changed in 50 years and if you live in a country invaded by american wars you wouldn't think of it as a good social policy. the other piece we'll talk about more today is then it was focused on poverty. what do you do with these people that are needy in a rich country. today as you were just mentioning, it's a much larger conversation about inequality and 1% and idea that poor get hurt more because 1% is gobbling up so much more of what's out there. >> i'm glad you brought up personal responsibility piece. especially people on the right but a lot of people in this country feel like you are poor because of choices that you've made and that's consistently not the case. you give people no opportunities in terms of where they live and education they get and you say it's you're fault that you're poor, that's not the case in a country where there's little to no accountability. >> it goes to getting a healthy economy. that's the bottom line. >> it is about choices. i don't want to end with a corny

joke, toure, but it's like when you say you don't like my outfit and it's not only the choices i make, i have to choose from all the ugly ties i bought over the years. i'm constrained. so good. >> awkward. >> it's like the end of an awards show. up next, we'll talk about something good. left striking back. what's behind a new way of progressive politics and is it even that new? [ male announcer] it's simple physics... a body at rest tends to stay at rest... while a body in motion tends to stay in motion. staying active can actually ease arthritis symptoms. but if you have arthritis, staying active can be difficult. prescription celebrex can help relieve arthritis pain so your body can stay in motion. because just one 200mg celebrex a day can provide 24 hour relief for many with arthritis pain and inflammation. plus, in clinical studies, celebrex is proven to improve daily physical function so moving is easier.

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a number of developing stories we're following for you in the news cycle today. a deadly h1n1 strain of the flu is spreading like wildfire. doctors continue to stress the importance of getting a flu shot, which obviously protects against potentially deadly virus. checking the markets now, stocks are mixed because it is a mixed bag kind of a news day.

new numbers show strong private sector job growth last month. meantime, newly released fed minutes are providing some insight into the decision to participate in the bond buying program. many felt the benefits were diminishing. the annual hall of fame inductions were announced an hour ago. as usual it's a referendum on the steroid era. two pitchers got in. and a slugger frank thomas. beating out barry bonds, roger clemens and mark mcgwire. a steroid cloud over their name. president lyndon johnson declared a war on poverty 50 years ago. that battle continues today. >> this is not an abstraction. these are not statistics. these are your neighbors, your friends, your family members, it could at some point be any of us. that's why we set up a system of

unemployment insurance. >> some in the washington establishment called the president's push a resurgence of economic populism. politico declared that now suddenly there's a 2014 emphasis on inequality for democrats. not exactly. former obama aide says d.c. is missing one big thing. the last several decades of american history. a new article he recounts how economic has been popular and we don't think of it that way because powerful sources don't want you to know. i want to put up something on the screen here that we were looking at today thinking about your article. over the years to your point, when you ask people do you have confidence in big business, you don't get 60% or 51%. you get about steady numbers of 30% give or take have little confidence in big business. a few others have more confidence and that steadiness goes to one of your points, which is that basically over

time if we take a step away from politics and you ask people about the economy and what they want businesses to do, they are pretty skeptical that wall street is looking out for them. >> absolutely. what's really interesting about this is if you look throughout time, it's been very, very steady that people in america have really supported an economic progressive agenda that we're talking about keeping social security, making sure that you have a living wage for fellow americans and making sure there's unemployment insurance and these type of measures. it's not necessarily reflected in the laws that are passed because there is actually quite a big difference between the campaigns and between the governoring. regular people have their stay when it comes to campaigns. that's when you vote and you see populous messages from politicians trying to get their votes. when it comes time to governing, what happens is a lot of times it happens when there's not a lot of sunlight and you have

corporate lobbyists and business interest with a bigger role in what's happening governmentally. that shouldn't be mistaken for what actually is the will of the people. >> you are right. these ideas aren't new. what people are noticing and talking about and feeling is a new assertiveness on the left for these populous ideas and part of the problem as michael pointed out a little while ago, part of the problem is that republican programs fit with the needs and desires of their donor class and democratic programs don't tend to fit with the direct needs of their donor class so we get into a sort of push/pull on democratic side whereas republicans feel very comfortable to be bullies around their ideas and then we end up looking like wimps. >> it's a really great point. if you take probably the highest profile example that everyone is talking about right now when it comes to economic liberalism and that's bill de blasio in new york city, if you take money out of new york city, they have a public matching system which is public finance which they talked about a lot on the national

level, hasn't happened. doesn't look like it will happen any time soon. what that does is take away the influence of big donors. bill de blasio ran saying i want a tax on rich. i want to focus on needs of the poor. people are trying to get into middle class. so he was able to do that without worrying about what big donors might say. when you have another system like federally where donors play a big role, they end up having such influence on policies that are proposed and ultimately implemented. >> i think one of the other things that does feel different right now is there is such a focus among the population, not a new focus because a lot of these programs have been broadly popular for a long time, but there's such a focus and such a push on income inequality in particular that even republicans are having to address this issue. marco rubio just today on the 50th anniversary of the war on poverty talked about a living wage. let's listen to that. >> they never became rich. this he never became famous. and yet my parents lived the

american dream. because like most people for them, happiness was not about becoming wealthy. it was about finding work that paid a livable wage. it was about a happy family life. being able to retire with security and being able to give their kids a chance to do anything they wanted. >> are we at a different moment just because there is so much pressure that even republicans are having to respond? >> i think so. to be clear, what i was saying is this isn't a liberal resurgence in the sense that these policies are popular. the point i wanted to make is these policies have been popular for a long time. bill clinton's campaigns were populous and even abby would agree that george bush's campaigns in 2000 -- >> he did push for raising benefits. that's one of them. bush did raise benefits as one example in 2002. >> unemployment insurance. >> exactly. and so when he ran in 2004, that was about national security. he want running on trickle down

economics. populism, progressive policies popular for a long time. krystal, you are right, minimum wage is an issue. there is a new energy behind these right now in part because the media caught on and seen what happened with bill de blasio and a big media narrative and more energy behind it and republicans feel the need to respond to that. to be clear, these policies have been popular in america for quite a while and it's unfortunate that we need to think that it takes a grand recession for it to get the attention of a lot of people in washington. >> tell us where some of these examples have taken as we talk about the progressive movement around for some time. who were the de blasios and elizabeth warrens and what did they do? >> someone around for white a while who i try to direct attention to because he's an important figure in this is brown in ohio. he's a senator who is in the house of representatives for some time before getting elected to the senate. represents what most people would agree is a purple state.

it's voted for obama. but generally seems competitive in presidential elections. he ran as an unapologetic economic liberal. very, very fiercely protective of the poor, of the middle class, of unions and has created a road map for liberals for how to talk to the rest of the country on these shoes. >> thank you very much. now, up next, if you judge a book by this cover, take a look at that. our next conversation could get pretty interesting.

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open it. and stick your head out and yell i am as mad as hell and i won't take this anymore. >> anger expressed decades ago in that classic film is coursing through america's veins especially through people who our next guest say feel humiliated and tossed aside. men who are white feeling marginalized and affirmative action is reverse discrimination against them and watching factory jobs disappearing and "angry white men" says it's true but not accurate. enemies are not women and men of color. our enemy is an ideology we inherited from our fathers. i'm proud to welcome the author of this powerful new book to the table. michael, you say that the core of the problem is this sense of aggrieved entitlement.

that's the ideology inherented from our fathers that you're talking about. what is that and how does it function? >> let me explain it by telling you how i started to think about this book in the first place. i was on a tv talk show more of the audience format some years ago and i was there opposite for what i now came to call angry white men. these were white men that believed they were the victims of reverse discrimination in the workplace, affirmative action. that they were qualified for jobs, qualified for promotions and they didn't get them. boy, were they angry about it. so here's the title of this particular show. the title was a black woman stole my job. so that was a quote from one of these guys. so i simply asked the question, i said i have a question about the title of the show. a black woman stole my job. it's a question about one word in the title. i want to know about the word my. where did you get the idea it was your job? why isn't it the title a black woman got a job or black woman got the job because that sense

of entitlement is what men as a group carry with them. white men particularly that these were our jobs. we expected the workplace and our family lives to look in a particular way and now in a very different world from the world of our fathers or our grand fathe grandfathers it doesn't look that way anymore and guys are angry about that. anger is real but directing it toward those who are below you on a black woman who stole your job, by directing it in that way, they miss the analysis that would tell them why they are feeling the way they do. >> one of the things that you write about in the book is that one of the manifestations of this entitlement is in violence against women. a horrible situation in this country and in other countries around the world where domestic violence is the leading cause of injury to women. we also -- there's an article making rounds this week that i don't know if you caught in the

pacific standard about how women are unwelcome on the internet. the threats of violence, the threats of sexual assault and insults that women face online and this culture seems to be pervasive. >> it's incontestable. i think that violence against women is a worldwide phenomenon. globally somewhere around 40% of all women have experienced some amount of violence globally. in some countries it's as high as 70% or 80%. globally violence against women, real violence, is certainly a problem. some part of that may come from that same sense of entitlement. i felt entitleded to having my dinner on the table when i wanted it, sex when i want it, whatever, and violence is a way to restore what i felt entitled to. the virtual violence on the internet that you're describing is a relatively new phenomenon and there's a rage that's being expressed and all three of you have experienced this on a daily basis, the comments you get, the

kind of rage that people feel permission because anonymity. it makes you think that as we have moved and this is incontestable, as we have moved toward greater social equality for people of color, for women, for lgbt, we have never been more gender, sexually or racially equal in our history, so i think what's happening in these arenas is a lot of the rage at that equality is spilling over and you're seeing an ugly side to the greater equality that's actually been taking place. >> i want to ask something controversial obviously. we see massive school shootings happen all too often and a number of them happen to be white males. is there any connection to the research you've done and what we're seeing? >> well, i don't think some of them happen to be white males. in fact, virtually all are white

males and they are also suburban. they are also using assault weapons. so gone is from the school shooter category are the boys of color who walk into their inner city school with a handgun and say you dissed me and they target a specific person. now what you have, since 1999, since columbine, a very new type of school violence. you have a person who basically wants to take his own life. you have suicide by mass murder in the same way you have suicide by cop. boys have done me wrong. they have been bullying me and torturing me. this is constantly what they are saying. you have done me wrong. you have hurt me so much. you have destroyed my soul. i'm going to get even with you. i will show you. i will go out in a blaze of glory in a typical sort of time tested western movie american way. and so i think that these guys

have that sense. i'm entitled. and frankly, look, they're right in a sense. they are entitled to go to school without being tormented and tortured. they felt they wouldn't take it anymore. they walk into their schools with assault weapons wanting to take as many as they can and then themselves. >> you do have some answers in the book. you say answers are to decouple masculinity. it's a fascinating book. thank you so much. up next -- what is up in enext? if only i could focus. >> it's time for the "your business" entrepreneurial of the week. derrick lost his coat at a bar in college and thought there had to be a better way. the entrepreneurship major decided to update the coat check process for the digital age using phones, tablets, photos and qr codes. for more, watch "your business" sunday mornings at 7:30 on msnbc. if i can impart one lesson to a

new business owner, it would be one thing i've learned is my philosophy is real simple american express open forum is an on-line community, that helps our members connect and share ideas to make smart business decisions. if you mess up, fess up. be your partners best partner. we built it for our members, but it's open for everyone. there's not one way to do something. no details too small. american express open forum. this is what membership is. this is what membership does.

sorry. i was day dreaming for a minute. back to the show on day four of our unplanned unofficial new year new you series today we tackle something you need to keep all those resolutions that you have made focus. get the joke. whether you're an olympic athlete going for gold, ceo looking to improve your company or the host maybe of a cable news show, just wanting to move the conversation forward, we all need to focus on our goals. in the new book "focus hidden driver of excellence" there are three kinds of focus that every leader needs. self-awareness, systems awareness and empathy and daniel joins us now. daniel, i wanted to start with the three types of focus you call them inner, outer and other. towards people. why are all three so important to make you effective?

>> well, it's not just ceos, it's all of us that need these three. inner focus means being self-aware. knowing what you're feeling, being able to manage your feelings. this is really a key to feeling. this is a key to concentration. our worst distractor is our emotional preoccupations. that's a big distractor. it's as bad or worse as all the e-mails or tweets that we get that pull our attention away. it's technically called cognitive control. being able to focus on that one thing that matters and put aside other things until later. turns out this as amazing economic implications. if you look at kids four to eight and you assess them on their ability to stay focused

this way, it predicts their success better than iq. that's that inner focus. >> wow. >> the second is being able to attune to other people. empathy. being able to read what other people are feeling so you can be more effective in your communications. there's an interesting political implication. people who are of higher power in a relationship, actually pay less attention to people of low power. they don't notice them as much. people of low power are keenly attuned to higher power people. there's an empathy gap. it means people with lots of power are making decisions about people with little power on the basis of little knowledge. i was impressed by the congressman who shadowed the homeless man to get a sense of what his life was like.

that's a real anti-dote to this empathy gap. then there's systems awareness. understanding the economic systems, the political systems, whatever it may be, that are really effecting our lives in massive ways. i think the biggest one is the blindness that we all tend to share between the impacts of our daily activities, the things we buy and do, and the global systems that are supporting life on the planet. our systems of construction, of energy, transportation, industry, commerce are degrading the national systems that support life on the planet. carbon is just the poster boy. i think we all need all three of those. >> what role does gender play in this conversation? should men and women approach this differently? >> well, men and women do approach this differently. women are wired to be more

empathetic. when i talk about self-awareness, self-management, empathy, social skill depends on empathy. those are the components of emotional intelligence. the best leaders have very strong emotional intelligence. women tend to be better at men than empathy and social skills. men tend to be better than woman on average at self-confidence. when you look at the top ten leaders, there's no gender difference. it disappears. >> interesting stuff. you talk about how you use your focus -- is also critically important when you talk about your athletes. think about what you want to do, i want to sink the ball, rather than focus on what you don't want to do because that becomes

a recipe for choking. >> i was talking to a fellow who was a sports psychologist. he consults with a major league football team. the worst kind of feedback a coach can give is what you did wrong. what a coach needs to do is what you need to do right next time. that gives you a continuous curve of improvement. the difference in amateurs and professionals in practicing is really interesting. most of us after about 50 hours of practice, we stabilize. that's as good as we're going to get. the pros, however, have a coach who is watching their performance and gives them a tip on what to do next to get a little bit better and they have a continuous curve for improvement. >> what about these things, our phones, our technology, our tablets, our gaming? is it destroying our focus or is

it helpful in some way? >> it's a combination of both, but i think on net it's a real danger. i think attention is under assault in a why it's never been. of course they're wonderful. it's great we can go online, that we can look things up on wick peed ya. we have social media. it enriches our lives. the problem is this -- we need a continuous concentration, an uninterrupted time and place where we can get that thing done that's so important. oh, you've got an e-mail, you've got a text, you've got that phone call. every time we let ourselves get distracted, it ruins our concentration. it can take ten minutes to ramp up to that full productive mode that we were in before. you have to make more effort that's ever been true in human history to pay attention well.

>> yes, i think we can all relate very much to that. thank you so much. >> pleasure. we'll be right back with the final thought. joe doesn't know it yet, but he'll work his way up from busser to waiter to chef before opening a restaurant specializing in fish and game from the great northwest. he'll start investing early, he'll find some good people to help guide him, and he'll set money aside from his first day of work to his last, which isn't rocket science. it's just common sense. from td ameritrade.

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if you haven't had enough of us by now, check out the interview we did part of what was posted today. we reposted it on our facebook page. ari melber takes over now. it is time for the experience. good afternoon. it is wednesday january 8th. chris christie's administration

in hot water. and the president opens a new chapter in the war on poverty. >> 50 years after president lyndon johnson declared -- >> unconditional war on poverty. >> unemployment insurance has been a vital economic lifeline. >> it is a new agenda of classic warfa warfare. >> if you extend it beyond 26 weeks, you're causing them to become part of this perpetually unemployed group. >> these are your neighbors, your friends, your family. >> we lost. we should stop fighting. >> we are concerned about those who have had a difficult time. >> we would consider extending emergency unemployment benefits. >> we may be walked into a