>> we've been together for four years. it's just something that happens. >> this man ranks as one of the most talked about inmates on lock-up. but now he's out of prison and his tattooed eyeballs continue to fascinate.

>> [ bleep ] [ bleep ]. >> another x inmate attempt ss harness the rage he felt behind bars. and for one young woman, life after lock-up means coming to terms with a devastating childhood memory of witnessing her father killing her mother. >> i said please don't kill mo. she was laying in the hallway and blood was coming out of her mouth. >> and now for the first time, she will watch the video of her father's final hours before his execution. >> most of the inmated featured on lock-up -- though he is now

out of of prison, he will forever carry an inescapable eye days. he first met him when he was serving four years for credit card fraud in colorado. they each tattooed the whites of their eyes. bulches chose red. inman, blue. >> why? >> i don't know if you can really ask why. the question is why not? >> two and a half years later, his cell mate is still in prison. but david bulches has completed his sentence and is living outside denver in aurora, colorado. >> ihallway. >> i am done. bulches has seen a number of changes to his life since

leaving lieman. he has found love with his new girlfriend, beth hendrickson. the most surprising change is how his appearances on lockup have made him a sensation. >> look on the internet. type up tattooed eyes and find out who pops up. i do. since i've gotten out of prison, i see somebody every single day, at least two or three times a day, that have asked me about my eyes. >> look at your eyes. >> right on, man. >> that's pretty cool. >> they are tattooed. >> they are tattooed. >> your eyeballs? >> yeah, see. >> oh. wow. >> i've got stopped on the street. people are like, you are the guy. i have had a couple people ask for autographs. i ain't no celebrity, you know what i mean. yeah, i've been on tv. i'm on the internet but i'm just me. >> they look at my eyes and they are like -- >> they are scared of you. >> we are constantly getting stopped. i saw you on tv. can i get my picture taken with

you? that's something i've gotten used to. >> every time we go out, you always get someone. >> your eyes turn me on, man, every day. >> every time. >> everybody is like, oh. >> it trips me out, for real. >> doesn't that drive you crazy? >> nope. >> no, not at all? >> don't you know who i am? >> your first impression when you saw him? >> i wasn't too impressed. i heard about the eyes. i have never seen i show the before. i had to actually look it up. i'm not sure that i would do something like that nor would i want my children to but it's unique, for sure. it's growing on me. he is like a cupid. >> i get a lot of questions about it, really. >> bulches says he has been to the optometrist since leaving prison and reports no problem with his vision. theechb the color has faded a bit over the past few years, he is not sure if he will tattoo it

again. either way, he is sure of one thing. if he does color them again, it won't be in prison. >> what i learned about from being in prison, there is a better life away from the criminal life. the enjoyment of life, being able to live it and not look over your shoulder is great. >> upon his release, bulches started off on the right track. >> i got a good job fixing and flipping houses, getting paid $1,000. living in big houses and having a car. people buying the houses were like, you are the guy on tv. are those tattooed? what's wrong with your eye sns are those contacts. >> bulches would discover for an ex-con, success can be tenuous. his fortunes turned south when he picked up side work as a tattoo artist. >> one dude owed me money for tattooing and he found an easy way that he wouldn't have to pay me. he tried to set me up to make it look like i was a heroin dealer.

he didn't know me by my real name or nickname. all he knew was i was the guy with the red eyes. >> bulches' eyes made it easy for authorities to identify. he was picked up while still on parole and sent to jail. the case against him was eventually dropped an the charges dismissed but the damage had been done. >> sitting in jail for eight months caused me to lose my job, lose my car, lose the house i was staying in. it caused me to lose everything. i got back out and had nothing. i worked so hard trying to do everything perfectly fine this time. i don't know. it's aggravating. >> bulches does some tattoo work to help support himself. yes, he says he has tattooed more than just typical body parts. >> i've tattooed about five people's eyes since i've been out of prison. it has been weird colors, like knee on green, fluorescent pink.

i did one guys orange and blue. one of his eyes was orange, one of them was blue and then the normal regular colors, red and green and purple. >> while you are here tonight, why don't you just get your eyes tattooed? >> i'm looking for a job. it would be kind of hard to do with your eyes that way. >> is that the case, david? >> well, some jobs, yeah. if you look at it and kind of freak out and wonder, what the hell, wonder if i'm always high? >> making ends meet hasn't always been easy. now, david and beth are about to face and even greater challenge will. >> we are about to have a kid. that's a big step. >> i'm 14 weeks and huge surprise thichlts t surprise. this is the baby at 11 weeks. the baby is really there. it is not just a line on the test strip. >> just wait until it comes out. i can give it tons of sugar and leave it with you all day. >> right. >> i think he is terrified, terrified.

it's something he has never done before. it's not his normal life that he has dealt with. it is something totally new, terrified for sure. >> i just hope it is not like me at all. i'm bad. growing up, i was very, very bad. you name it illegally, i probably have done it. stealing cars, breaking into houses, selling drugs, but now i've learned from that mistake. i don't want my kid to grow up being a bad kid. i want to be able to be there and do things so the kid won't have to go do all that stuff. >> as for the future, david and beth are planning to move to a small down in northern colorado to raise their child. >> we want to open up a tattoo shop. we don't have to worry about somebody else having to grow up now. it is having to do right and put all the stuff we know about having to do bad, all the illegal stuff we know, flip it and make it all legitimate.

>> people make mistakes, some people more than others but i know his heart. he is a good person. coming up -- >> the former lockup inmate who went from head banker to professional wrestler. >> this is the bud judy of msnbc locked up fame. >> later, the woman determined to tame bobry ray gilbert's wild heart. >> i saw more than the crazed psychopath. i saw past that. a house, under siege. homeowner calls in the big guns. say helto home defense max. with the one-touch continuous-spray wand. kills bugs inside... ...and prevents new ones for up to a year. guaranteed.

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aurora. >> we have 60 days to polish you up. don't know if we can do it. >> i'll tell you. >> when we met michael gill during our extended stay shoot at lyman, he was two months away from his sentence and. >> when i move home, it is going to be so much different. >> at the time, gill was completing a two-year sentence for sexual assault. he maintains the conviction was improperly handed down. during our shoot, he frequently displayed a volatile temper. >> i am probably going to head butt, because i don't get a shower. >> gill's flare-ups and disciplinary problems added six months to his sentence and landed him in segregation. but when gill's anger retreated, his sense of humor always seem to reemerge. >> i got my shower in. i'm good. >> how is your head?

>> my head is fine. >> really? >> yeah. how is your head? >> two years after his release, gill says he never plans on returning to prison again. >> every single day i was there, i could have got killed. i learned that breaking the law is not worth anything to he moo. i would rather stay out here and live a good, productive life, like lyman sucked. i had to watch my back every day to make sure someone wasn't coming up to stick me with a knife. i don't want to be there. it is a great feeling to know that i am done with my prison sentence and done with parole. i haven't been in trouble since i have been out, other than a speeding ticket. >> since his release, there has been a major change in gill's life. >> i have a son. i dated his mother for a couple months. i told her the classic line, i have high blood pressure. don't worry, you won't get pregnant. my blood pressure wasn't that

high. she got pregnant. my son, that is the best thing that's ever happened to me since becoming free. he is my reason for everything i do. >> gill split up with his son's mother but says he still strives to be a father, even though his status as an ex-con makes things difficult. >> i still don't have a car. i still don't have a job. i don't have my own place. this economy sucks. >> so gill returned to a part-time career that he had gun to explore prior to his incarceration, professional wrestling. >> let's go. >> who is the boss here? you think you are the boss? >> one of us happens to be a celebrity, guy, famous wrestler? >> that's me. >> gill's close friend and sometimes tormentor is fellow wrestler, bill garcia. >> big rich is the most obnoxious, heaviest mexican i have ever known in my life. i love him for that. >> i have known michael for

about three years. it's a love/hate relationship. >> get that -- >> shut up. >> guy, grow up. >> what he does pisses you off. then, there is times where he can just be the most loving teddy bear that anybody has ever met. >> whoo. i'm winded. >> gill also has a new girlfriend, tisch birmingham. >> with her, i finally found out what true love is. i trust her. i have never trusted any woman. >> tisch is gill's biggest ringside fan for his wrestling matches which usually take place far away from the arenas featured in big-time television matches. tonight's match is in a big-rented club in denver. >> would you like mexican wrestling shows. since i'm white, i'm obviously

going to be the bad guy. duby is my wrestling character. it's a stoner character. i'm not a stoner. i don't smoke pot at all. most people that smoke marijuana are out there a little bit. that's why i'm that. i don't smoke weed but i am the ayatollah of smokeabola. i come out and pretend i'm stoned. i trip over the ropes. i laugh at things. i eat food during my match because i have the "munchchys." >> big doobie. >> bud dubbie, he is a character. >> it fits michael gill to a tee. the crowd loves to hate him. he knows how to work the crowd to piss them off. >> you are mexican now.

>> coming up, bud doobie takes to the ring. michael gill reflects on where bud ends and he begins. >> it is kind of hard to distinguish the real me in the character i play. >> and the woman who is about to become life to one of lock-ups most memorable inmate. >> i don't look at bobby as a killer. it's just something he did. it is not something he is. (dad) well, we've been thinking about it and we're just not sure.

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when we visited colorado's lyman correctional facility to shoot our extended stay series, inmate, michael gill, told us about his alter ego. >> my wrestlealing name, bud doobie? >> this is the bud doobie of msnbc lockup fame. >> two years after gill's release, bud doobie was alive and well and wrestling in a denver nightclub. racist humor is a big part of

the bub dubie character. >> why don't you get up and show me your green card. >> i like getting reactions out of people, whether it is good or bad. >> gill admits it is sometimes hard to tell where bud doobie ends and michael gill begins. >> i have had a problem since i have been in prison with racism. i am not going to lie about it. there is a whole different culture in prison. you learn to hate everyone but whites and that's kind of followed me out here. even to this day. >> let me tell you people something, when this is over, i ain't never gonna be here. y'all are all going back. >> michael before he went to prison, he didn't have a racist bone in his body. for some reason, as he came out, he started to have all this problem with my other wrestlers of ethnicity. i had to sit down with mike and say, you have to reprogram

yourself. you are not in prison. >> i need to drop that. it's a problem. i use it as the shows. >> shut your stupid mexican mouth. >> honestly, i don't believe that he is genuinely racist. i think some of the things from prison kind of boiled over. ♪ oh say can you see shut up. >> but it isn't only bud doobie's racist that is rooted in his past. >> i think wrestling is a release for my anger. the matches are predetermined. when i slam someone, that's 100% real. >> where do you think the anger issues come from? prison? >> at lyman, gill frequently lost control of his temper?

>> always having to fight i was in situations where like if you weren't an angry person, you were a weak person. the mentality follows me from prison down here. >> sometimes i get so pissed off, i want to snap. >> lately, gill's anger has to do with making ends meet. his wrestling career doesn't fully sport him, much less his son. >> i don't like the things that go on in this world. there is so much i need to do for myself. i cannot do it because there is no jobs and i don't have a car and i don't know how to begin to take care of those things. so i am pissed off. so when i was at lyman, i was ad dam, i will never take a job for under a certain amount of money and i only want to do a certain amount of job. >> what am i getting out to a $10 an hour job, african-americans make more than that. i don't have any goals. >> since i have been out, since i have had a son, i will take

any job for any wage because i'm no better than anyone else. >> why don't you go ahead and do a couple back rolls. >> though gill says he still struggles with anger, he knows how important it is to contain it. >> i know that if i lose control, i will lose my son. so i keep that in check. >> he doesn't drink anymore. i think he has really turned around and prioritized a lot better. >> i need to let go of my prison experiences and find more positive outlets, instead of holding in all this negativity. sometimes exploding. i want to find a job and get a place that i can raise my son so when he is 10, 12 years old, he can be proud of his daddy. i want to provide for my girlfriend. my goals are to settle down and grow up and live life to the fullest. and do positive.

>> gill's friends say they are committed to helping him stay on track. >> michael has a good chance of staying out of jail if he has positive people behind him. me, for one. >> i love you, bro. i love you like the sister i never had. >> as long as i am alive, michael gill will stay out of prison. coming up, one of lockup's most unforgettable inmates finds his soulmate. >> bobby asked me. he said, i love you. i've never loved a woman as much as i have loved you and will you be my wife. later, a death row inmate places his final phone call to a lockup field producer. >> i get three hours to live, what's going through your mind? i've always had that issue with the seeds getting under my denture. super poligrip free -- it creates a seal of the dentures in my mouth. even well-fitting dentures let in food particles. super poligrip is zinc free. with just a few dabs, it's clinically proven to seal out more food particles

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mind. he fatally shot three and injured 16 before turning the gun on himself. the taliban denies being in an an attack that left an a.p. photographer dead. hamid karzai has expressed sadness about that incident. now, we're taking you back to "lockup." due to mature subject matter, viewer discretion is advised. when we first visited the holman correctional facility in alabama in 2006, we met an inmate who would turn out to be one of the most provocative and volatile to ever appear on "lock up." bobby ray gilbert. >> you want us to exhibit some form of model behavior but then every avenue is closed to us to do anything destructive. we can't read a novel because we can't have one. i can't play chess through the

mail like it used to. >> it is segregation. it wasn't meant to be nice. you ain't here for being to church or because you was doing something good. >> when we returned to holman for our extended stay series, we found gilbert exactly where we had left him, in ad seg. the administrative segregation housing unit where inmates are locked down 23 hours a day. it houses the most violent and destructive offenders. it is where bobby ray gilbert has spent almost all of his 27 years in prison. >> i have life without parole, two life sentencein, two 99-yea sentence, a 40-year sentence, a 10-year sentence. yes. i have anger issues. >> gilbert's many conditions are for robbery, assault and two counts of murder. one was carried out against another inmate in prison. during our shoot, we would see

his anger erupt again. >> we are trying to do it the right way. i'm going to show you what i'm made of. >> but gilbert proved to be more than just a violent man. he also showed us a thoughtful, creative side. the last interview we did with gilbert, he seemed resigned to his fate of spending the rest of his life most likely alone in the small cell. >> at this point, you just look back and realize, well, the best part of it is over with it anyway. >> five years later, we would discover that gilbert's appearances on "lockup" had opened up a new chapter in his life. she goes by the name of angel, preferring not to give her last name. she is bobby ray gilbert's fiancee. >> we have been together four years. it is just something that happened.

i didn't set out for it to happen. it just did. >> the alabama department of corrections denied a request to interview gilbert but angel told us the story of how she first became involved with gilbert, shortly after seeing him on "lockup." angel had initially contacted another holman inmate featured on the series, sherman moore, who held the job of prison barber. it was moore who acted as matchmaker. >> i wrote to sherman and developed a friendship with sherman. >> you think you can pull a flat-top fade out of your hat. >> is that what you want? >> i also saw the segment on bobby. i inquired about bobby, what kind of a person is he? >> i was telling him about me dragging that bottle of scope up to west jefferson. >> sherman encouraged me to write to him. he is like, write him, angel. write him. he said, you might hit it off. he says, you and him, personalitywise, are very similar.

so i wrote bobby a letter. because i just saw something more than what was shown, bobby breaking that window, pacing in the cage, mad. >> so help me god, they are going to transfer me. >> i saw more than the crazed psychopath. i saw a little bit more past that. >> i didn't have a childhood where you could be a kid, play. humor and cutting up wasn't all looked upon too favorably. >> there was something more to him. i wanted to get to know him. >> angel received a response from gilbert almost immediately. >> angel, so i'm curious, why does an attractive woman with a busy lifestyle take the time out to write a guy in prison? aren't you worried that i'm going to bust out of here, hunt you down, harass you at work and make obscene phone calls to you?

thank you for the picture, angel. very nice. love that hair. you gotta be at least seven feet tall talking about kicking my ass. ha-ha, don't be a stranger, angel. take care of yourself. with a smile, bobby "g." >> when angel began her correspondence with gilbert, she was living in joliet, illinois. her son, nico, was only 15 at the time. >> at first, i was very worried about her emotional safety. i wasn't sure how it would end up. >> what had gun as just a pen pal relationship, qukly became something more serious. >> on a sunday evening at 8:00 at night, my son brought me the phone. he said, there is a collect call on there. i thought perhaps it was from sherman. and it was him. it was bobby. i communicated with him every day since. >> my mom was just glowing. she was happy. it was really nice to see her like that. >> i started feeling something

for bobby. i was falling in love with him. it is an emotion that you can't control. it just happens. >> after four months of calls and letters, angel decided to make the 700-mile trip from illinois to alabama. she visited bobby for the first time. >> it was only three hours. it was very special. he was sitting next to me. i could see bobby out of the corner of my eye just grinning and staring at me. it was really cute. >> over the next few months, angel made the trip two more times and on her third visit, gilbert had something special planned. >> bobby took my hand and he said, i have nothing for you but this. i can't financially support you. all i can do is love you and be your friend and be there for

you. i mean, i got tears coming down my eyes, because i know what's getting ready to happen. bobby asked me, he says, i love you. i've never loved a woman as much as i love you. will you be my wife? i mean, i'm crying, yes, yes. i threw my arms around him. that was it. >> angel quit her bartending job, packed up her teenage son and her life in illinois and moved to a small town in alabama where she would only be an hour's drive from the prison. she got a job as a bar tender and built her life around visits to gilbert. >> you've got to be strong for it. it is not all fun and games. our visits, we laugh and just enjoy each other's time. but when they say visits are now over, you are leaving someone that you love there. if you can't hang, you don't need to be involved with

somebody whose got a life without sentence. life without parole in this state, you ain't getting out. >> coming up -- >> this woman is some crazy fan that saw him on tv, sent him honey and he ran a little game on her. >> angel finds engagement doesn't stop the competition for bobby ray's affections. >> later, the life after lockup segment that goes beyond the death chamber. >> this is what my dad gave me before he was executed. before. (agent) i'll walk you guys through every step. (dad) so if we sell, do you think we can swing it? (agent) i have the numbers right here and based on the comps that i've found, the timing is perfect. ...there's a lot of buyers for a house like yours. (dad) that's good to know. (mom) i'm so excited.

i day dream about the whole getting out, having a family, a picket fence. you know, the day dreams are to get out and do it right this time, you know. now, the i day dream about how

you can blow this whole prison up and kill everybody in it. >> despite bobby ray gilbert's history of violence both in and out of prison, his fiancee, angel, says, when she sees him, she sees a different side. >> i don't look at bobby as a killer. it is just something he did. it is not something he is. >> though gilbert is serving life without parole, angel still manages ways to include him in her daily home life. >> these are our visiting pictures. people may think it is an obsession, which it is not. i can't see him physically daily like joe blow and his wife. i see him on a picture. he is with me but he is not with me physically. there is more to a relationship than sex. you have got to have trust, respect, good communication, companionship. i have all the above but i just

don't have the physical part. >> angel wasn't the only woman who has seen gilbert on loblgup as she is often reminded when she searches his name on the internet. >> they come out of the woodwork, these women, of all ages. just, i'm in love with you. i'm gonna -- i want to have your love child. i want to marry you. i have found a new love. his name is bobby ray gilbert. his friends call him snake. he makes me laugh. he makes me feel good. he says the sweetest things. he is a total bad ass. my kind of man. >> angel says gilbert has used these women to his advantage, namely developing relationships so they will put money in his prison account in order for him to make purchases from the canteen. >> like a ball player plays baseball for the love of the game. bobby plays women for the love

of the game. just like a chess game or a hand in texas holdem. he is a master at it. this woman is some crazy fan that saw him on tv, sent him money and he ran a little game on her. if you are going to be one of these skanks out there, one of these crazy women that see him on tv, he is a total badass, i'm going to change his life or have a flower garden in his honor. that's great. open your wallet up to him and he will bleed you dry. >> at the same time, angel sends bobby money as well. >> the money i give bobby per week goes on his inmate account so he could buy himself some groceries. he eats with it. >> how are you so positive and sure you are not part of this game? >> because i'm me. because i'm special. i know who i am and what i am to bobby gilbert. i'm not game and i'm not a trick

and i'm not something to hustle, unlike the rest of these people out there. >> gilbert told us he is looking forward to the wedding but must be released from ad seg before the couple can be granted permission to be married. even though angel is resigned to the fact that gilbert will never leave prison, that doesn't stop her from imagining a more ideal lick home life. >> i day dream about simple things, what it would be like to make bobby a breakfast plate and bring it to him or tell him, get it yourself, i ain't your maid. i love everything about him. i love his temperament. i love his personality. i love his intelligence. his wit, his sense of humor. i love everything about him. i wouldn't change anything about him outside of one thing. that would be his freedom. i sincerely mean that from the

bottom of my heart. >> there are many things lindsey christmas would change about another inmate featured on "lockup." now, it is too late for that. >> this is what my dad gave me before he was executed. someone he was good friends with in prison had made this for my dad to give to us. my brother god one as well. i believe this is made out of toilet paper, which is really neat. it has the date at the bottom. december of '09. that's when my dad passed away. >> lindsey's dad was erik wrinkles, an inmate we met on death row during our shoots at indiana state prison. we were with him in the final appeal of his death sentence was denied. >> at first, you are a little stunning, even though you expect it. it's a little bit of a surprise. even though you expect it.

other than that, it is what it is. it is like having cancer and know you only have so long to live. you start getting rid of possessions, make sure you have a will written up, tying up loose ends. >> anything you want to say to anybody? >> not at this time, no. >> nothing? >> no. >> fifteen years earlier, wrinkles was convicted of three murders. his wife, debra, had recently left him and taken lindsey and her brother, seth, to live with her brother, tony and his wife, natalie. shortly after midnight, wrinkles arrived at the house dressed in full camouflage. >> he had paint across his face, two marks on each side of paint. it was like a rambo look. >> wrinkles first cut the phone lines. then, kicked through the back door. 13-year-old lindsey was awakened by gunshots and witnessed her father murder her mother. >> i was saying, please, please,

don't kill mom. she was laying in the hallway and blood was coming out of her mouth. before i had saw that, i looked in the room beside and my uncle tony was playing face down. i knew he was probably dead. it was lindsey who ran to a neighbor's house to call 911. by then, her mother, uncle, and aunt were already dead. >> i really couldn't fathom what was to come. >> today, lindsey lives in a small, rural town in the florida panhandle with her husband, two young children and a managery of pets. >> sometimes i like to come and sit outside and just look around. it is our own little sang tu ware. >> but the past never fades away. lindsey still cherishes memories of her mother. >> i like this picture, because my mom looked more like this

one, about have she passed away. >> lindsey's husband, blake, is a corrections officer at a florida state prison. they have been married for six year years. >> i never thought i'm going to marry someone that works at a prison. it just turned out that way. just knowing things about prison life, i guess helps me to know what my dad had to face every day. this one was when he had first went to prison. >> how did you feel when you was in there? >> i was hurt and sad that my dad was in prison. then i was angry, because i felt alone. >> she thought about how her dad was in prison and the rough life she had. i would ask her about it and she would come out more and more. she finally came out and told me the whole thing. ways hoping that i could help her through it. >> this is me with my uncle tone

in i. i was very little. makes me miss him. he was my favorite uncle. i wish that i could have a normal life. very little contact with him. >> some of the letters that he would write were not nice. this is a letter that my dad had wrote me. "lindsay, for the life of me, i can't fathom why you are now so damn hateful and disrespectful to me. did i, a, beat you, b, molest you, or c, pimp you out? if not, how was i so mean to you? think about it. eric." >> i kind of felt bad for lindsay when i read it, because that was someone that she loves, that was her dad, and i know she, even though she distanced herself from him, she still loved him because that was her dad. >> so, i responded to his letter. it says, "eric, i don't have

problems, you do. you put yourself on death row. you killed mom, tony and natalie and had no remorse. they meant the most to me and you took them away. i will never forgive you for taking my family and neither will they. this will be the last time i ever talk to you." >> but years later, lindsay would change her mind. coming up, lindsay's final visit with her father, the day before his execution. >> about an hour or so left. i just want to tell them both i love them. >> and the never before released audio recording of eric wrinkles' last phone call, mere hours before his death when he reached out to a "lockup" field producer. >> it's kind of strange to think that you're not going to have to do the normal things that you do every day, you know? for fast, long lasting relief, use doctor recommended gaviscon®. only gaviscon® forms a protective barrier that helps block stomach acid from splashing up-

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♪ on the day before eric wrinkles was to be executed at indiana state prison, he received a visit from several relatives, including his son, seth, and his daughter, lindsay, who at age 13 had witnessed wrinkles murder her mother. this never-before-seen video was shot by another family member. it was the first time in six years that lindsay had seen her father. >> i don't want there to be guilt of me not saying what i need to say, because after he's gone, he's gone. i can't go back and say anything if i wanted to, and i thought and prayed about it for a long time. i told my husband, this is what i need to do. i need to make amends with my dad. even though you're not out and you're in here, you've still done and what you can do is live your life to the fullest and help people. and you've done everything you're supposed to do on this

earth, and even though you're being here, that's pretty remark able and i know when you get up to heaven, the lord's going to ask. >> it's been two years since the visit and wrinkles' execution, but this is the first time lindsey has watched the video, even though it had been in her possession the entire time. >> seeing my dad kiss me and hug me is weird, because i couldn't remember the last time that happened. >> december 10th, 2009. these are my kids, lindsay and seth. i have about an hour or so left. i just want to tell them both i love them and miss them. >> when i saw him, he apologized for everything. and that, i think that's what i needed. >> hours before her father was executed, lindsay decided to

leave indiana and make the long drive home to florida. >> i didn't want to see him die, and so i left. i didn't want to hear anything else about it, i didn't want to see it. i was just ready to go back to my family. >> but later that evening, just three hours before he would walk into the execution chamber, wrinkles would talk to one last person outside the prison walls. he placed a phone call to "lockup" field producer susan carney. >> i stayed in touch with eric after we finished our "extended stay" shoot, because we decided we were going to document the last few months of his life. we did a series of recorded phone conversations, and our last conversation took place the night of his execution. i guess three hours to live. what's going through your mind? >> i guess it's kind of surreal, this whole situation, you know. other than that, i'm not really thinking about it, you know? i'll tell you the truth, i think sometimes i deserve to die and

sometimes i don't. it just depends on the day. so you know, it's time to go. i just hope my kids will be okay. >> in a lot of my prior conversations with eric, he was often very angry and defensive about the night of the murders. he was not willing to take responsibility for his role. >> i don't feel like dealing with it, i don't want to think about it, i don't want to do anything, you know. >> but in our last conversation, he seemed almost peaceful, you know? like he was ready to accept his death. do you think about what you're going to miss? >> i mean, the little things, being able to walk out the door, see the sky, see a tree, walk in the grass, that stuff. it's all those little things that when you come down to it that are worthwhile, you know, that's it. i was just thinking, you know, there's not going to be any more brushing my teeth, getting up out of bed, going outside, or any of that stuff. it just seems kind of strange that you're not going to do the normal things you do every day. it just kind of seems weird. what am i going to do?

i'm not busy trying to keep myself busy, right? what am i going to do tomorrow? i don't know. so, you know, it's kind of strange to think that, but that's what's going through my mind now. it's weird. >> though lindsay had been through the trauma of losing one parent to murder and the other to execution, she's decided to use the past not as a burden but as a guidepost. >> the past has helped me, because i look back and say i'm not going to do this, i'm not going to be like this, i'm going to make a better life for myself and for my kids. ♪

due to mature subject matter, viewer discretion is advised. i'm not going to lie, i still think about getting high. it is always in the back of my head. and this is it, i can't get high ever again? >> a dangerous drug makes a comeback in city of hackensack, but this time with a dangerous twist. >> and you will see that they are very close to their moms and that is why i call them mama's boys. >> my mom is afraid that she will bury me. >> i feel weak without him. and it's not because of lack of