>> nothing was easy about going back to colombia. you could hike and bleed all day and cover just a couple of miles. it didn't really occur to us how dangerous it was. four soldiers just materialized out of the bush. we're surrounded, and it's just crazy. they were going take me into the

jungle and put a bullet in my head. >> i was 21 when i went to the university of colorado. i really wasn't doing very well. i wanted to leave. i was thinking about what i was going to do next. i was from colombia. when i was very small, two months, i was adopted by an american couple. and it occurred to me that i should go back to colombia. i think it's important for people that have grown up somewhere else to go back. it would be an adventure. i figured i would grow as a person, and then everything would make sense. i kind of road tripped down from

colorado. that was an important part of the trip was to really get off the tourist track. i wanted to go back to colombia in a way that was meaningful to me. i can fly or take a boat. it was kung fu or something, this idea that i would be walking through central america. i felt there was some truth to this. you get on a road, and you can take it all the way south, but it ends in panama. that's it. but to cross into colombia, you have to cross the darien gap. the darien is kind of mythical. it's jungle for hundreds of miles. it was challenging, this idea to cross the darien. frightening. but why should it be easy? i bought a machete, a pair of tropical combat boots, small

military backpack. didn't really want to carry much. >> mosquitos? si, si. >> bought a baby blue mosquito net. it's almost comical. how does one shop for a jungle adventure? i was trying to shed my american appearance. i felt it would be easier for me to blend in. i don't know if i did a very good job. i look kind of like a bum, i think. >> hola. >> the last thing i needed before i left was a map. >> darien? >> not a lot of people ask for a map of the darien, obviously. and i'm looking at what kind of maps are there. and this guy walks in. he goes to the same counter. >> hola, senora. >> he asks about a map of the darien. >> si, darien. >> this is kind of strange. and i'm just all ears. i'm curious. >> that's a coincidence.

i was just looking for a map of the darien as well. >> he introduced himself. >> robert. >> why are you so interested in the darien? >> he said he was a journalist. the woman gave us a set of aerial photographs. they all looked the same. it was just green. just trees. >> it's going to be a big help. >> you couldn't distinguish one from the other. when were you thinking of going? >> the next day or two. >> i think both of us were trying to figure out if it was a good fit to go together. so we agreed to meet up at his hotel. already i was thinking about if we were going to travel together, how this would go. >> i brought some maps of my own. >> my plan was to kind of go unnoticed through darien. but he was traveling with another woman who was my age. >> my friend megan. >> i'm like, you know, she is blond and six feet tall. at that point i'm like, well, there's no way we're going to be sneaking through the darien. >> we're just trying to figure

out the best route. >> okay. >> i think meg was so sure about me coming along, which was funny because i kind of had my own concerns about them. i think we were all a little interested what we would encounter in the darien. >> we could run into some colombian guerrillas in this area. >> right, the farc. >> i knew about the farc. farc stands for the revolutionary armed force of colombia. i was interested in what they were trying to do. they were people that in my 21-year-old liberal arts mind were taking direct action. i thought that they would change the way things were in colombia -- poverty. it was romantic. freedom fighters. yeah. there was a discussion about the potential of us being kidnapped, but i had to get to colombia, and i was going to do it this way. >> so how do you feel about us all going together? >> i said yeah. >> let's do it.

>> we got in the boat, and there we were, headed into the darien. i didn't think there would be any real severe consequences. anything that i was going get into, i felt that i could get out of. i think we all felt that way. it would take all day to travel three or four miles. but we were definitely on our way. robert had a gps. but the gps was tough in that part of the world. we tried to get our maps to gel with the gps. we couldn't get the map to coordinate. it became very clear that this type of journey was impossible without a guide. we went up river all day, and we arrived at a native village, capati. at that time we met victor. he saw us pull in.

>> hello. welcome. good morning. >> mark. >> i liked victor right off. he was really friendly. >> good morning, miss. >> hi. how is it going? >> i am single. >> older, earlier 50s. victor kind of took us on a tour. we walked through the village. he showed us his house. we told victor we were planning to cross the darien into colombia. and that didn't seem like too big an issue for him. he talked about his experience guiding in the past. and he claimed to have contact with the farc, which was another relief. that's one less of a reason to worry about a guide that has contacts with the farc. kind of won us over, you know. >> si, bien. [ speaking spanish ] >> leaving capati was phenomenal. it was happening. it was really happening. we had a young boy that was our guide to the next village. we were on our way.

the first couple of days were really rough for robert. he had like heat exhaustion. it was just really difficult keeping enough fluids in him. we were hiking between like 10 to 12 hours each day. portions of the trail really slow. we had to cut through brush. they weren't well traveled. we'd walk in riverbeds for an hour, and then suddenly our guide would skirt off on a very small almost like a game trail that you would never spot on your own. we walked for almost 12 hours coming into pucuro. it was dusk. and we startled the people there. it was just a really rare occurrence to have people coming to the village.

these young men came out. they had machetes. it felt really hostile. yeah, i'm scared. i'm scared. i have no idea what they're going to do. with 1% when you buy and 1% as you pay. with two ways to earn on purchases, it makes a lot of other cards seem one-sided. why do we do it? why do we spend every waking moment, thinking about people? why are we so committed to keeping you connected? why combine performance with a conscience? why innovate for a future without accidents? why do any of it? why do all of it? because if it matters to you, it's everything to us. the xc60 crossover. from volvo. lease the well equiped volvo xc60 today. visit your local volvo showroom for details.

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i don't know what's going to happen. are we going to be beat? and it's just crazy. they were all in our face. there was dogs. just unbelievable commotion.

we're uninvited. we're in the darien. we've left the police outpost. and all we really have is victor. all i can think, stay with victor. stay with victor. if anyone is going to sort this out, victor is going to sort it out. victor kept his calm, and he walked directly to the chief's home. obviously they wanted to hear from us what we were doing there and what we were planning. victor negotiated with the tribe. >> the next day, victor negotiated guides for us. the plan was for the guides to take us as far as paya, which was the last panamanian village.

in just a matter of days, we'd be inside colombia. i certainly didn't think we put the most difficult part of the trek behind us. we had yet to enter the border region, the real heart of the jungle, if you will. we hiked all day through the jungle. i remember victor kind of laughing with the guides about the amount of water we were drinking. and then we did run out of water. at first it's like wow, i'm really thirsty. i would like some water. and then it's i don't feel well. i feel light-headed. we need to find water soon. eventually, we found a grove of green bamboo. >> bamboo. agua. >> they would hack off part of the tree and cut off the top and you literally have six to eight

ounces of water stored in the tree. it was like a tremendous relief. we hiked all afternoon, and that afternoon we arrived in paya. coming into paya was much different than pucuro because they were expecting us. we made it to the last stop before you cross the border into colombia. that evening, we attended this tribal meeting. i can remember there is a group of young men kind of dancing in circles, playing their music, enjoying themselves. we ate fish and then rice and some bush meat, iguana. you eat what is served. and it was good. it was good. by that time, things were moving along pretty well, and we were able to negotiate with the chief for guides.

i couldn't believe where i was. i felt incredibly fortunate. i felt like i was doing what i set out to do. we were there for a couple of days. victor told us that it would be safer if we made contact with the farc now rather than later. he told us that a local commander with the farc would meet with us. we spent a whole day. we just hung out. but they never showed up. if the farc had showed up, that would have been a huge relief, but that didn't happen. and the following day, we left. leaving paya, i knew we were close to colombia. we were probably about a day or day and a half from the border. paya was our last village, and then beyond that, the really serious part began.

hiking through the jungle is what you would expect. everything is sharp and pointy or trying to eat you. i had a compass, but you can't just pick a direction and walk east. there is ravines and valleys. you could hike and bush whack and bleed all day and cover just a couple miles and not really be any farther than where you started. there would be points where the guide would turn around and we would go back the same way we came, went off in another direction. you don't have any line of sight, and you're down under the canopy. and you really don't even have a sense what direction you're walking. what i notice more than anything was this feeling that we were almost walking in circles. you'll pass a tree or some sort of feature of vegetation, and you'll swear you already walked by it.

we camped at night and expected to be in colombia the following day. the next morning we woke up, we had breakfast. >> hey, robert, are you all packed? >> all packed. >> what about your hammock? >> and we continued. we knew that we were probably going to cross into colombia that day. right around noon, we decided to stop for lunch. and while we were eating, three men we knew from paya passed us. they were headed to the same village, and they were moving quite quickly. they had heavy bags, but they were moving much faster than we were. exchanged pleasantries and they were off. we knew we wouldn't see them again until we got there. so after lunch, we grabbed our stuff and we got back under way, and slightly after that, we were

up on a ridge line. it was open. there was a storm that had come in and knocked down a lot of the trees and we were all kind of picking our way through. and it was at that point where we heard the gunshots.

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[ gunshots ] >> we heard the gunshots. they were very distinct. >> is that what i think it is? >> they were farther up the valley. maybe a mile or half mile away. they were just low bursts of fire. boop boop boop boop, boop boop boop boop. my heart is racing. i remember kind of having my own -- my own moment of anxiety, you know. at that point, our guides simply said that they weren't going to continue. and they dropped everything they were carrying, and they ran. there was no discussion.

they were going back to paya. end of story. in moments, they were gone, and robert's gear and our food and everything were just on the trail. >> mark, are you okay? >> and now it was victor and meg and robert and myself. before we could talk about what we wanted to do or what our plan was, two of the men who had passed us earlier in the day showed up. one of them was bleeding, and they were completely terrified. apparently they had been cutting bamboo and people had just started shooting at them. that's all they could say. and then one of them sort of showed where the third man had been shot, that they had killed him. and they continued back to paya, where our guides had just run off to. i was trying to delay panic. i figured there would be time

to panic later on. but at this point we needed to figure out what we were going to do. i remember being quiet. i remember not really saying much. i just kind of went back into myself. this wasn't really my game. robert was the one that suggested -- >> i think we keep going. >> toward the ambush. >> it will be safer than to turn back. >> what about victor? >> we stay together. >> mark, are you happy with that? >> i'm scared. but this was something that i kind of hoped to encounter, a true, true, true test. >> okay. so we're all agreed. >> it was that important to me that i could deal with whatever it was down the trail. there was a lot of internal monologue. i was thinking about the fact that maybe their first response was going to be to open fire.

robert suggested that we speak loudly. >> louder. say anything. >> so they would have ample warning before we encountered anyone who may have been shooting. >> where are we going, victor? >> i was kind of reaching a bit of a breaking point. >> i said mark, what kind of movies do you like? >> keep talking, louder. >> after maybe just 15 or 20 minutes, we made our way up to a bluff, and robert i think actually said -- >> this would be a really good place for an ambush. >> and four soldiers just materialized. they just stood up. short hair, young, probably all in their early 20s. and i remember very distinctly that the soldier just in front of me had a green bandanna and a single blue feather right in the middle. it was striking.

they were armed, pointed their guns at us. we had our hands up, and we took off our bags, and then we sat down. at that point, the soldiers were just immediately on their radios. [ speaking spanish ] >> we were thinking they were the farc. victor was the one with the farc contacts. and now we were going to fall back on victor's relationship, and also robert as a journalist. [ speaking spanish ] >> they wanted to kind of figure out who we were. >> tell them i'm a journalist. >> robert had articles, and he kind of wanted to demonstrate to them that he actually was a journalist. but they weren't too interested in our story. they started this casual conversation about tiger meat, tigre. and they asked victor if he had ever had tigre.

>> victor said yeah, yeah, it's very rich, very rich. and they said yeah, yeah, we really like tigers. tigers eat tigers. you know, predators eat predators. from there they went on to say that they had just seen a tiger, in fact they had shot at one in the jungle. and they kind of hinted at whether or not we heard the gunfire. >> no, no, no. >> no. >> we said no. we all had the good sense to keep our mouth shut. after about an hour waiting around, another group of soldiers arrived. now there was maybe 30 or 40 soldiers, like right where we were. we don't know what the hell is going on. they separate us from victor. victor was nervous from the beginning, and i could kind of see it on his face. he was too far away to hear what

he was saying, but he was talking to the squad commander. eventually victor came back and the squad commander launched into this speech about the revolutionary armed forces of colombia, the farc. they were members of the farc. they were there to protect the people of colombia. and we listened. when he was done speaking, victor started speaking to me in english. >> this man, i don't know. >> he was trying to appear casual, but he was struggling. he was really trying to pick his words carefully. >> say it again? >> this man is no good, no good. >> he told me he didn't trust them and he didn't know them, that he was worried. at that point i was really

confused. victor didn't know who they were. they claimed they were farc, but they were making up stories about shooting in the jungle. they hadn't killed us. that's good. but it was another story now. how were we going to get out of this? discover. get it at discover.com. go get help, boy. go get help. go get help! right now! if you're a cat, you ignore people. it's what you do. if you want to save fifteen percent or more on car insurance, you switch to geico. it's what you do. go on kitty, kitty...

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they wanted to see our maps. and they had some questions about paya and who was there and what was there. they decided that they were going into panama for themselves, but they needed a guide to retrace our steps. [ speaking spanish ] >> what did he say? >> he says they want to take victor with them to panama. >> there was a brief argument. >> tell them there is no reason to take him to panama. >> we were pretty emphatic about it. but victor didn't really say much of anything on his behalf. i think at that point he realized that things were beyond his control. [ speaking spanish ] >> i mean, we really pleaded with them, but they assured us. they said it's not to worry. we're just going to secure the area. a situation that i put myself in, decision after decision led me to this point of running into the farc.

this is almost exactly what i thought might happen. did i not realize the seriousness of this. i was really worried. i was convinced victor was probably dead. we more or less stayed put right where we were. they put us right in the middle of this group of soldiers, maybe 20. so we slept surrounded. no one was going to sneak off in the middle of the night. and i don't remember sleeping a lot that night. the soldiers, they would pull guard duty all night. every couple of hours, four or five soldiers would get up and go in and take posts, and four or five more would come back. i don't know what they wanted. i don't know what we would do if we were permanently held. to be so foolish as to just

stumble across a border the way we did. our ability to make choices had ended once we walked down the trail. in the morning, they moved us. it was very warm, and there was a particular smell in the area. it could have been anything, but it smelled -- it smelled like death. that something had happened at that location. the two men that run back and the third that was killed, we saw their things. they were just kind of torn open, strewn apart. his body wasn't there. it was just the bags that the men had been carrying. but it felt like a body. their things felt like a body.

at that point, we were kind of with this small group of soldiers. kind of made a camp there in the jungle, and we just waited. so i'm thinking, okay. so this is the farc, the left wing, you know, the freedom fighters. they were young, really young, kids, really. 16, 17, 18 years old. i wasn't an expert about the farc, but i had some pretty pointed questions, kind of philosophical stuff. but any conversation that i tried to engage them with just didn't go anywhere. they were curious about robert's ipod. they wanted to talk about music. they wanted to talk about their families. >> mi madre. si. >> at night they were kind of jumpy. and i think that kind of comes with being in the jungle for as long as they had been.

it was just on the edge of darkness. it became more this distinct noise. and i asked if anyone else heard it. it was distant, but it was low. it kept building in intensity over the span of maybe four or five minutes. the soldiers started to become alarmed, because it continued to get louder and louder and louder. >> is that a helicopter? >> we were thinking maybe it was a helicopter. but the sound was becoming more complex. there was this kind of clicking, almost like a metallic sound. now the soldiers are totally spooked. and their little squad leader is telling them to take positions. and they don't want to go. we're all like what do you think it is? robert looks at us and said -- >> it sounds like a column of men coming towards us.

>> and i listen, and it's just right there. of course. it's a massive amount of soldiers running towards us through the forest. and then the noise just rose to a level where the soldiers just opened up. robert's like get as far away from the muzzle blasts as possible. i have a real clear memory of trying to, like, bury my head in the jungle. and it ceased firing, and there was just silence. just complete silence. and then someone says -- [ speaking spanish ] >> it's pigs, wild pigs.

and that's exactly what it was. we hear helicopters, black hawks have a really distinct sound to them. kind of real low, throaty. we would all kind of look at it, but it's impossible for them to see us. we were certainly kind of under guard, but we weren't restrained. our hands were never bound. we also really didn't talk about escaping. that was a step that i don't think we were prepared to even think about. there was opportunities. they were kind of careless with their weapons. they would just leave them around. sometimes they would forget them. but then once you escape, where do you go? we didn't have provisions on us. then we really would have been on our own. frankly, we didn't have a lot of our own survival skills.

then that evening another group of soldiers arrived. >> you recognize those men? >> they were the soldiers that went into panama. they had heavier mortars, russian squad machine guns. the commander that originally took victor reassures us that victor is going to be coming along any minute, and they demand all of our electronic equipment. they took our media, our passports, everything we had. the level of anxiety, it's gradually building. >> rapido. >> it was like grab your bag, get your stuff. we need to leave. as we are climbing out of this ridge line, robert and i began this conversation which was basically how do we really know these people are who they say they are.

we thought if we were going to run into somebody, it would be the farc, but i remember victor was nervous from the beginning that he didn't really know who they were. when he left, he was really quiet. i'm certain he feared for his life. it's possible he was thinking they were sworn enemy of the farc, paramilitaries. i knew that there were rumors about them using chainsaws on people. the citi double cash card. it earns you cash back now and cash back later. with 1% when you buy and 1% as you pay.

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we are sharing a little bit of our soul. to life! and when we eat, we begin with our eyes. just as the beauty of the food entices you to try it, the beauty of the website should entice you to explore it. i am eric ripert and this is my squarespace. i was familiar with the paramilitaries, the right wing, the death squads. i was aware that their tactics are horrifying. they wanted support in the rural areas, and they were willing to do anything to get that. it was pretty rare that the

paramilitaries would take people and then release them. now i have no idea what was going to happen next. we hiked all night. moving at night, you just follow the soldier in front of you. you can't see anything. just pitch-black dark. nobody can use a flashlight, because there was potential to run into other groups. it just feels like it's never going to end. finally, we arrived at the village that was kind of our original destination in colombia. we come out onto this really large soccer field and there's

dozens doze dozens of soldiers already sacked out on the field, and we just crashed. we were all beyond words just so fatigued. i don't remember sleeping. i must have. but just a couple of hours later, 4:00 or 5:00 in the morning, the soldier woke me up. [ speaking spanish ] >> there was about six soldiers. i didn't recognize any of them. these guys were older. they meant business, and they told us to get up. of course, at that point it's just like are you kidding me? we hiked all night. we have only slept for a couple of hours and we're moving again. i'm waking up now and i'm realizing this probably isn't the best situation. i don't know these guys. they're not the soldiers that we kind of had a relationship with. just becomes apparent for whatever reason, they don't want us to be seen by anybody in the

village. at this point, i'm consciously fearful for my life. they take us to a graveyard, to a kuna burial site. it's outside the village. i look at megan, and what do you think? and meg has this kind of way of putting things. she is like, i don't know. shies like -- >> i think they're going to do us. >> really? >> i think you're right. >> that's exactly how i feel. is this it? is this how it's going go down? and she is i don't know. that's what it feels like. now i know what's going to happen. they're going kill us. they kept telling us they were going to release us, and they never did. we had been in the jungle days. and now we're in a graveyard. they took our media. so there is no evidence now. they have everything. they have us. we're going to be shot.

so we waited. and four or five soldiers showed up. and they took me by myself. [ speaking spanish ] meg was just like -- she just said goodbye to me. >> goodbye. >> they both said goodbye to me. >> see you. >> it was -- it was -- i went with them. i left. now i know what's going to happen. they're going to kill us. i don't know why, but they're going to kill us.

i kind of gave up at this point. i feel kind of in a weird way ready. i mean, maybe this is how it should have been. i mean, i'm back in colombia, right? things have kind of come around, you know. you always think you try to run, grab a weapon or something. but oddly enough, that wasn't on my mind. i just figured that they were going to take me into the jungle, put me on my knees and put a bullet in my head. f a stao wagon. no big deal... until your insurance company jacks up your rates. you freak out. what good is having insurance if you get punished for using it? hey insurance companies, news flash. nobody's perfect. for drivers with accident forgiveness, liberty mutual won't raise your rates due to your first accident. see car insurance in a whole new light. liberty mutual insurance. and you need an advanced degree. but making life changes is hard,

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as an employee of pg&e you always put your best foot forward to provide reliable and safe service and be able to help the community. we always have the safety of our customers and the community in mind. my family is in oakland, my wife's family is in oakland so this is home to us. being able to work in the community that i grew up in, customers feel like friends, neighbors and it makes it a little bit more special. together, we're building a better california. they took me out on to the river bank. most of the guerilla attachment was there and another superior had showed up. they sat me down like right in the middle. and now it's just like, wow, what's going to happen next?

the commander got for my a cigarette, and we started this conversation about politics. he wants to know what i think about the paramilitaries. pretty stern they're not the farc anymore. i told them what i thought about them. i figured if they wanted to shoot me, they would shoot me. i told them the paramilitaries were probably the biggest problem in colombia at the time and i talked about the assassinations and the murders and massacres. i just sort of gave him a piece of my mind. i think i probably was ranting. and partway through the rant, this commander kind of interrupts me. and pulls off his t-shirt and like, there it is. we're paramilitary. skull and cross bones is kind of their tag. what do you think about that?

i said, i take the cigarette now. i just run my mouth off, it was a big joke. it became clear they got instructions to play along with this farc storyline. and the joke really was on me, but i laughed, too. once everybody kind of laughed at me, i kand of became convinced they thought we were completely harmless. robert and meg were down the river bank when they saw me. they were surprised to see me alive. tell us that we can go. i almost couldn't believe it.

the next day, there were some people here to pick us up. we thought it was going to be the red cross, but it was a colombian priest and a nun from a convent. i hadn't really gotten time to think about what had happened. i was still wound up. a huge continual emotion, like dread and then relief. i felt like there was going to be a point where i would have to kind of dump all this stress and anxiety i was feeling, but at that point, i was hanging in there, i think i was hanging in there. we were out of the jungle. and we were definitely in colombia. the u.s. embass y sent this jet for us, and then the same day, they fly us to bogota.

they sit us in an office, and they're just all ears. >> so, we need to go through all the details of your trip. >> they want to know everything. >> all the details you can remember. >> that point, the cracks are starting. i was starting to feel burnt out. >> i would like to know more about your guide. >> there were a lot of questions about victor, how we met him. >> one of the locals. >> what he had done in certain situations. >> is he okay? >> you haven't heard what happened? >> it was then that we got the full story about what had happened after victor left with the paramilitaries. they got victor to lead them back into panama, and when they got to pia, there was kind of a celebration under way. for whatever reason, they didn't like the cooperation they were getting. the chief was killed by the

paramilitaries. his son was left for dead. from there, they left pia, and they went even deeper into panama. i'm guessing if victor wasn't convinced before he's a dead man, he's absolutely convinced now. so victor escapes. somewhere between pia and pucuru, this is like a 50-year-old man trying to outrun an entire squad of hardened, trained paramilitary soldiers in the jungle, and he outruns them. warns the village, and by the time the paramilitaries show up, the village is empty. they looted. burned a couple of the buildings to the ground. and then left. >> burned a couple buildings to the ground. and left. they took what they wanted, burned a couple -- >> when i heard about what happened, i blamed myself. this was an act of terrorism.

it was the first paramilitary incursion into panama. our guides were from pia. there had been people killed. i mean, every kind of fell away. the room started spinning. i just felt suddenly really horrible. i could just feel a fever coming on, and they asked me -- >> are you okay? >> i'm like, no. >> i need to lie down. >> sure, right this way. >> they sat me down and this nurse came in. she just said -- >> what happened to you? i completely lost it. i just cried. it felt really good. i couldn't explain to her what had happened to me because i -- i didn't know what had happened to me. but i had made it to where i wanted to be. i was back in colombia. that in itself was kind of overwhelming. really, i just had this day in

bogota, and that was it. i got a cab and i went to central park in the middle of the city. walked and sat on a bench. i had more questions sitting on that bench than i did when i left. there had been people killed, and maybe it was our fault. whether or not the paramilitaries would have gone into panama without us is up for argument, but i felt responsible for what happened. even years later, i still think about it. i still think about the choices i made to take that trip. i had gotten this idea in my head that i would personally pay any cost to cross the daurian, but in the end, i didn't have to pay it, really. other people paid for it.

due to mature subject matter, viewer discretion is advised. >> msnbc takes you behind the walls of america's most notorious prisons into a world of chaos and danger. now the scenes you've never seen. "lockup: raw." >> for some inmates, a prison sentence means nothing left to lose. >> what the [ bleep ] it look like? >> if i'm ever put in general population i'm as good as dead. >> but sometimes life has other plans. >> it's either him or me at that point. >> this [ bleep ] was real. it