a girl who believes in the best in humanity and who loves other people deeply and making her question who she is. making her question her faith in humanity. >> that is all for this edition of "dateline." i'm craig melvin. thank you for watching. i'm craig melvin. >> and i'm natalie morales. >> and this is "dateline." >> they could be your neighbors. >> a beautiful toddler. running up and down the halls. chasing our labrador retriever. >> they live with some of the most vulnerable among us. and they have relied on the care and kindness of others to get

by. >> i can't do it without the help. >> until now. >> i really need these people. and i can't have them. >> what are you most afraid of? >> his world is going to collapse. >> in this hour, an intimate journey where you will meet eric and nick and their extraordinary mothers. >> moms do what moms got to do. >> trials no family should have to face. >> i don't chk i could be more terrified than i think right now. >> and triumphs of, too. >> milk or juice? >> milk. >> a fight for their kids that none of us can afford for them to lose. >> with all the times that people told us that he would never? well, he is. >> hello and welcome to "dateline." all parents want a bright future for their children, but for kids

with autism, what if the one thing that will help is taken away? several years ago from 2012 to 25 20 2015, we followed two families. our cameras captured their successes and setback as they tried to navigate a very complex system for those with special needs. here with their story, on the brink, is kate snow. >> reporter: it's graduation day in a new york suburb a rite of passage that normally brings excitement, a sense of accomplishment, and endless possibilities for the future. this is nickolas kubicsko. his journey to get to this day was long because he has autism, a brain development disorder that can impair communication and social interaction. his mom lenore kubicsko is unspeakably proud. >> you go boy, you go! >> reporter: at a private school 60 miles away in new york city, eric sadowsky, another young man with autism, is also graduating sharing goodbye hugs and well-wishes with friends and

teachers. his mother mary clancy is feeling emotional about her son's last day. >> i was just hoping i would not start crying in the classroom. >> reporter: graduation is when parents launch their children into the world eager to see what lies ahead. but for these families the joy they feel in this moment masks the terror and dread lurking just below the surface. >> i wake up every morning, drenched in sweat and worried about what am i going to do about eric. >> reporter: that's because when eric and nick leave school they will lose the specialized help and structure they've had for most of their lives. and there's no equivalent state or federal support required to take over. parents of children with autism compare it to falling off a cliff. >> happy graduation. >> reporter: everything that we've worked for we are taking away and you will leap off a cliff into nothingness. right now the picture is

nothingness, it's black. absolutely black. rrt for three years we've chronicled the lives of these two families as they made this leach. >> i don't think i've ever been more terrified than i am right now. >> reporter: we've watched them struggle to find resources. >> he's falling apart. he's a mess. and i need help and i need help like two months ago. >> you don't feel like you can do it this morning? >> reporter: and battle to build a future for their sons. our story starts months before their worlds turn upside down on a warm summer evening in new york city where eric and mary are out on their weekly date. >> he's not afraid, not afraid, not afraid >> he's not afraid, not afraid, not afraid, not afraid. >> reporter: over dinner, eric and his mother talk about his upcoming birthday. >> and now you're a big guy. >> that's right. >> reporter: in a few months, eric will turn 21, the age when people with disabilities are no longer eligible for help through the education system. >> you're a big boy. >> and really becoming a young

man. you'll be a young man. >> yes. >> reporter: it wasn't so long ago that eric was a little boy, running around the apartment where he lives with his mother, father, and sister. >> he was a beautiful toddler, running up and down the halls, chasing our labrador retriever. he was such a loving child. and so attachd to me. >> reporter: but when he was about 18 months old, mary noticed eric only had a few words. and he'd become repetitive playing an old cassette tape again and again. >> and so that was the first hint. the pediatrician then said, "it's time to get him looked at." i don't think he got a full diagnosis of autism until he was three. but by two and a half, we were on it and had started therapies. >> reporter: you knew. >> we knew. we knew. >> reporter: eric started going to treatment centers to help him develop language skills.

>> eric, do you want some bagel? >> you want bagel yeah. >> reporter: mary was building a career as a professional artist, but she put those ambitions on hold to care for her son full time. >> reporter: did you miss it? >> oh i was heartsick. >> reporter: but then on the other hand i'm sure you would do absolutely anything for your son. >> of course. that's what was happening. i couldn't say no to any possibility of help for him. you know, i just saw so much potential. i knew this kid had so much in him, that any help that he needed, i, we gave to him. >> reporter: the symptoms of autism are measured on a spectrum. eric is roughly in the middle. there are many people who are far more challenged, like nickolas kubicsko. his story starts at home on new york's long island, where he lives with his parents and sister. nick doesn't speak, and spends large parts of his days watching disney movies, something his mom lenore says he does repetitively.

>> nick is watching his favorite scene in the whole world right now. the flavor of the month is "101 dalmatians." it's a few seconds long when he actually lets the scene play, he watched it straight for four hours. >> reporter: and nick has another common autistic trait, severe obsessive compulsive disorder. >> reporter: i saw him walking through a room. and he walked only on the edge of the room. >> he's developed a very, we call it choreography. it could take him two hours sometimes to cross a room. it's painful to watch. >> reporter: nick needs individual attention that's hard to provide in a classroom. so his local school district sends aides to work with him one-on-one at home. but like eric, nick's 21st birthday is around the corner. they'll both abruptly lose the services that have helped them come so far. >> is it cruel to offer something and then have it taken away? but it's even crueler not to offer it in the first place. and i don't know what the answer

is. >> reporter: the burden of caring for eric and nick will fall almost entirely on their families especially on their mothers and you're about to see what happens as they prepare for that life changing moment. >> reporter: in a sign of just how much progress nick has made his family is able to take him to his favorite place on earth, disneyworld. coming up -- in respect >> i think it's a cause for celebration, because he's come such a long way. >> reporter: but will nick and eric's progress continue without help? >> without purposeful things to do he will fall back into the autism world. copd makes it hard to breathe. so to breathe better, i go with anoro. ♪go your own way copd tries to say, "go this way." i say, "i'll go my own way" with anoro. ♪go your own way once-daily anoro contains

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welcome back to this he hedn of "dateline." it was the age when their schooling had to come to an end, worrying their parents about the next stage in their son's lives. continuing our report, here is kate snow. i'm not finding anything appropriate for him yet. >> reporter: eric sadowsky's parents are sitting in an emergency meeting with the principal at his school. >> what are the options for him for next year? >> reporter: eric's not in trouble. he has autism and by law. he must leave school when he turns 21 in a few months.

but his dad, richard sadowsky, says eric's not done learning and he and mary are in a panic about what eric will do next. >> to abruptly end his time here is not a good idea for him. >> reporter: eric has been a student at the rebecca school for the past five years. it's a private school dedicated to providing specialized support like speech and occupational therapy to children with developmental disabilities. >> it's a place where he's understood and he's cared about. he loves the teachers. he's very, very attached to them. the rebecca school is like a family to him. >> reporter: it's expensive too, $100,000 a year. after some costly legal wrangling, eric's parents got the public school district to pick up the tab. that's because federal law says states are obligated to educate children through high school. for those with special needs, that usually means up to age 21. >> ready, set go! >> without purposeful things to do, he will fall back into the

autism world, into his own inner world. he's so much happier out of it. but that's where his brain takes him. it's hard. i really need these people and i can't have them anymore. >> reporter: as an adult, eric will be eligible for social security. and he'll be able to apply for services funded by medicaid. but his parents have been warned that those programs will not be tailored to autism or build on the skills eric has mastered at the rebecca school. >> we just can't cut off educating and teaching and supporting people when they age out of their school program. >> reporter: linda walder is the executive director of the daniel jordan fiddle foundation -- a non profit think-tank devoted to studying the issues around adults with autism. because autism prevalence rates have more than doubled over the last decade, she says an estimated half a million young people with autism will age out in the next ten years.

>> and it's a tsunami of children who are aging to adult life. >> do you stop having autism when you turn 21? >> that is one of the general misconceptions about autism is that it only affects children. >> look, we're gonna play catch! >> reporter: the clock is ticking on nicholas kubicsko's services too. the long island teenager has just months left before he turns 21 and loses access to resources his mother says have changed his, and her, life. >> i never gave up on nick. i always knew that there was more to him. i knew that he was in there. i knew he was trying and when we supported him at home, i kept getting glimpses. i knew where that young man was. >> reporter: finding a way to reach nick has been a challenge. he used to live in a 24 hour residential treatment center. but lenore says the staff had trouble with nick's obsessive behavior. >> it was torture for him to

have someone try to intervene and rush him or prevent him from doing something. >> and what did that lead to? >> initially protesting. and it eventually evolved into him becoming very, very self-destructive, property destruction. and he would -- he began to attack people. he began to lash out. >> reporter: lenore says they had no choice but to bring him home. >> it's a lot for the family, but i know a lot of it fell on you. >> moms do what moms got to do. we do what we have to do. >> reporter: now their public school district provides aides to help lenore in the home and sends a teacher to work with nick for two hours every day. >> ready -- what is? what is this? you know it, yep. >> reporter: the teacher helps him communicate using a device that generates speech. >> pepper. >> yes, two more. give me two more on this page, okay? >> you really need more than one person to teach nick. >> i need a break. >> yeah, you can take a break. go ahead. >> when you have someone at his elbow to keep him calm and keep him focused, it does work.

>> reporter: with this individualized approach, nick's aggression has nearly disappeared. he's started venturing out of the house, taking trips to a local bagel shop, even the grocery store. he's made so much progress that his family decides to take their first vacation in seven years. the destination? nick's favorite place on earth. >> nick, we're in disney! >> this is a big deal. it's a big deal for our whole family. we all want to go home and talk about it. >> reporter: nick's older sister tasha says she's proud of her brother. >> it's a cause for celebration because he's come such a long way. and he's as typical as i would love for him to be. >> reporter: but as nick's confidence is growing, he may not know what's about to happen when he turns 21. his family knows and can't help but worry. >> what are you most afraid of?

>> pulling that plug. his world is going to collapse. everything that we've spent -- the hours, the dollars -- is about to go down the drain. >> reporter: in eric's case, he's very aware that change is coming. he even talks about leaving the rebecca school with one of his aides. >> so, you don't want to have a graduation party this year? >> not yet. wait until you're 25. >> okay. >> he's really under stress. he has a fantasy about taking all of the girls that he's loved all on a trip where they go away together. and he was going to have this be when he was 21 and he got so frightened of 21 that he moved it to 25. >> you don't want to have graduation for five more years? >> no, not yet. you have five more years of school!

>> from what you can tell, what does he know? >> he's pretty upset about leaving rebecca school and leaving his friends. and i don't have anything positive to tell him about what's coming up. coming up -- graduate eighting. >> nickolas joseph kubicsko. >> reporter: -- to an uncertain future. >> he's come so far. and tomorrow it just ends? that is crazy. >> when "dateline" continues. is this where you typically shop? is this where anyone typically shops? it's time to switch to the capital one venture card. with venture, you earn unlimited double miles on every purchase, everywhere, every day... not just airline purchases. seriously... double miles... everywhere! what's in your wallet? clubhouse, but we call it "the (matthwish house".was a (mom) and it just immediately brought something positive in our life. "oh, i gotta get up get matthew on his treatment."

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we that's why at xfinityic. we've been working hard to simplify your experiences with us. now with instant text and email updates

you'll always be up to date. you can easily add premium channels so you don't miss your favorite show. and with just a single word, find all the answers you're looking for. because getting what you need should be simple, fast, and easy. download the xfinity my account app or go online today. >> reporter: turning 21 is a pivotal moment in the life of a person with disabilities. before special education students like nick graduate, federal law says they must have

something called a "transition plan" created by their school district. it's supposed to be a set of measurable goals designed to prepare young people for adult life. but nick's mom lenore hasn't received anything. so she and her husband mike call the school superintendent to complain. >> i have no transition plan. and the clock is ticking. which is why i said to you, i'm fearful that we're just delaying and delaying here and nickolas's needs are not being met. dateline found nick's case is not unique. >> reporter: lenore begins making frantic calls herself trying to get nick hooked up with an agency that could provide him with adult services. >> here we are right on the brink. and i didn't know how to make it gel. the whole system just didn't make any sense at all. >> and there's no instruction manual right? >> no. it depended on who you got on the other end of the phone.

i remember making cold calls to 30 agencies and just taking notes like crazy and i look back at the notes and i'm like, "my god." it was chaos. >> you're doin' all right. >> reporter: there is one particular program lenore has been desperate to get nick enrolled in before he aged out known as "self determination." the government would allocate a certain amount of money for nick and let his family pick and choose how to spend it on services for him at home. but with graduation just a few weeks away, lenore finds out he's been wait listed. >> he has no program to transition to. because the funding is not there and he is stuck on a waiting list. >> ok thanks, bye bye. >> reporter: eric's mother mary is deeply concerned about her son's transition too. she's been looking for adult programs for him for years. >> my short list of things that i thought probably would come through, i'm working my way through them and i'm getting a lot of shut doors. >> reporter: mary's finding there are few options for adults and even fewer options for

adults with autism. >> i had wanted to put him at one of the local ys. they said they had a special needs program. it turns out now they only go to 14. this is a phrase i hear from agency, program, center, all the time. >> reporter: on the day after his 21st birthday, eric walks into school for the last time. >> bye eric! >> no, sabrina. you're not done yet! wait until 2016. >> that's so far away! right now we're in 2012. >> it's really tough. i wish we had more of a plan for eric. >> reporter: joshua rich, eric's head teacher, says the day is even more difficult because eric is the first student to age out of the rebecca school. >> we've brought him so far and then we're leaving him in uncertain position, which is really upsetting. here's your artwork. want to put that in your backpack? >> reporter: eric wants a quiet ending. no graduation ceremony, no

party, no celebrations. eric's principal, tina mccourt, says his departure is tough on everyone. >> i think the students are definitely feeling it, and i know the staff is -- i uh -- phew. i feel very much like a mother hen of all the students here. for eric, i'm so proud of him. he's come so far. but it's concerning that he's not going to some place that's gonna be supportive and meet his needs and allow him to move ahead. i feel worried about him. so um that makes it harder to see him go. >> time to go home! >> everybody should give these kids and these adults a chance because what they bring to the table. is really amazing. they have so much to add. >> bye tina >> can i give you a hug? would that be ok? goodbye.

>> alright, eric i'll see you, man. >> reporter: eric gets on the school bus for the very last time, headed toward an uncertain future. while eric's transition was deliberately unceremonious, nick's is much more of a celebration. >> we're going to graduation? >> reporter: although nick hasn't been in a regular classroom for most of his life, he's participating in the school district's graduation ceremony at his parents' request. his teacher holly stovall along with his sister tasha support him as he receives his diploma. just a few years ago, a crowd like this would have been overwhelming and stressful for nick. >> nickolas joseph kubicsko

>> ladies and gentlemen, let's hear it for the class of 2013. >> when he had that gown on, he was proud of himself. he had a smirk. he held himself a little high. sitting at graduation he showed everybody, "you all thought i couldn't? i sat here. and look it -- i walked the stage myself. and i did it." and he did. >> reporter: the celebration will be short-lived. nick and eric are about to find out that their immediate future is chaotic and threatens to undo a lifetime of learning. >> he's come so far in these couple of months. and then tomorrow it just ends? like that just is mind boggling for me. that's crazy. >> reporter: coming up -- we take our hidden cameras inside a "dayhab" for adults like eric.

>> just sitting in a room like in storage.

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i'm dara brown. president trump attended the opens of the civil rights museum where he made brief remarks. several black leaders boycotted trump's appearance and did not attend. in california, at least one death is being blachlblamed on wildfires. 200,000 people have fled. now back to "dateline." our chasm areameras followe families documenting the upheaval in their lives as their special needs sons reached 21

and their school programs an bankrupt abruptly ended? what would the future hold? here is kate snow. >> reporter: a month after nick's graduation, his mom lenore is flipping through his appointment calendar. it's where she keeps track of his meetings with teachers and other caregivers, and it's empty. >> there's nothing to write. there's nobody coming. lenore is on her own. >> reporter: what are those first weeks like? >> i remember pulling the shades, turning on the air conditioner and saying, "ok buddy. it's just me and you." >> reporter: as the weeks went on, lenore says she watched her son regress before her eyes. >> his personality dimmed. his willingness to interact dimmed. because there's less practice. there's less to do. there's less opportunity. it's like -- it's literally dimming the lights. >> reporter: nick has been on a waiting list for government money to pay for the at-home services his mom really wants. but there's a catch, even if the funding comes through, the state requires anyone receiving services to have a social worker.

and lenore can't find one. >> ok. when you're ready. >> reporter: lenore has taken nick for interviews at a number of agencies that provide social workers. but none of them have agreed to take his case. >> to raise an autistic child you almost, you can't -- you can't do it without the help. and right now um, i don't know how we're gonna do it. i don't know what kinda life he's gonna have because we're looking at a really barren landscape for him. i don't think i've ever been more terrified than i am right now. >> reporter: autism advocate linda walder says government programs aren't designed for adults with autism. >> the problem is, is that system is really broken. it's dated. it's not addressing the needs of adults and the growing population of adults living with autism. >> reporter: without appropriate

jobs or housing adults with autism have higher rates of unemployment than individuals with other disabilities. >> you don't feel like you can do it this morning? >> reporter: and 80 percent under age 30 live at home which is what eric is doing now that he's turned 21 and aged out of the rebecca school where he had constant support. >> reporter: does 21 seem arbitrary to you? >> for these kids, it's terribly arbitrary. i understand that the state has to have some limits. they can't support people forever. but this is no solution. >> reporter: mary wonders if all the money spent educating eric will have been a waste if she can't find something productive for him to do now. this is what eric's day is like since aging out, little structure hanging around the apartment with nothing to do and nowhere to go. >> suddenly it hit us that we're into the rest of our lives. and that's been a big change and a frightening one.

>> reporter: with no more teachers and friends to stimulate his language skills, eric is already losing some of the speech he gained in school. >> so she can't sit in a sofa. circle. >> sofa or circle? >> circle. so he, so she can't sit in a so, in a circle. >> he's sleeping 12, 13 hours. kind of drifting in and out of his room, singing to himself a lot. regressing into his own world. a lot of withdrawal. ♪ >> reporter: eric's mother has explored free day programs offered by the state known as "dayhabs." she didn't like what she saw. what did you see? >> i saw rooms full of people with their heads on the tables, wandering around, just being in storage. they're just sitting in a room. >> reporter: dateline took hidden cameras into some of the day programs to see for ourselves. we said we were looking for a

program for someone with autism who was aging out. this is what we saw, at one a group of adults gathered in a room doing very little. at another, people with special needs are working, gluing strips of rubber to metal. a staff member tells us they spend most of their day in this room. >> the hours are from 8:30 to 3:00. they have a break from 10:30 to 10:40 which is a coffee break. and then they have a lunch break from 12:30 to 1:00. >> reporter: and outside the facility there's barbed wire the staff says is there for safety reasons. and the thing is there are often huge wait lists to get into dayhabs like these. >> somebody who works for the state told me not to look at the state programs because they are terrible. >> reporter: that speaks volumes. that someone in the state system would say, "don't come here." >> yeah. she said, "honestly they're all horrible." >> reporter: new york state says

it's helping more and more people with developmental disabilities lead increasingly independent lives. it says it's in the process of shutting down those sheltered workshops and trying to help people find jobs. >> ruth can sing a peanut butter sandwich made with jam. >> i had always thought when he got older i had this vague idea that he would have some kind of a job and that it would be over. and i am only adjusting now over the last two years in this transition period to understand that it's never going to be over. as long as i'm alive, i will be caring for eric. >> reporter: being a champion for someone who has a developmental disability can be draining. studies show a higher incidence of depression among parents and caregivers. six months after eric's graduation, mary is struggling. >> reporter: it must be so hard. >> it is exhausting. the biggest thing that hurts is for me is loneliness and isolation. it's very, very hard. but i absolutely love this boy. >> reporter: mary is feeling

desperate and starts to think one of those dayhabs might be better than nothing. so she sends in an application. >> i still wake up every single morning in a panic and worried about what am i going to do about eric? >> and eric needs to get outside! >> i look at the future and that feels so hopeless. >> i mean, mommy! >> okay. >> reporter: both families are watching their sons slip away, discovering they have to make compromises but as difficult as things seem one family is about to discover things could be even worse. coming up -- >> we have nice weather. that is about the level of service that we have here. we always tell people, "don't move here." >> the team that comes to help him, helps me do better for him, >> reporter: and heartbreak. >> reporter: what does it mean to the family? >> it'll be long distance. >> reporter: when "dateline" continues.

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>> reporter: as the weeks went on, lenore says she watched her son regress before her eyes. >> i couldn't sthach out snap out of my own depression and i decided if i didn't do something, he would stay the same way. >> so he becomes her son's teacher. >> i built a binder for him,

lessons. put together a daily plan for him. this is how it is set up for adults. you graduate and all education stops. and eric is nowhere near finished with his education. >> they are also paying on out of pocket for activities to get him out of the house. he has a gym membership, a music therapy class and a companion to take him places. but it is a staggering cost. >> do you have any idea how much money you've spent on care for eric? >> probably our least expensive year has been about $40,000. and the higher ones have been around $90,000. >> for a year. >> yeah. we haven't been able to save any money. we don't have a retirement. but it's kind of like when people ask me how much does it cost to raise a kid with autism? everything you've got.

>> reporter: finally good news, he is approved for the self-determination program. now she has state medicaid money to hire a support team for nick including some familiar faces like his former teacher, holly. >> the team that comes to help him helps me do better. because when they are here, neat his needs. >> you can breathe. >> they carry him and i get to sit back as mom and go you go, guy. look, you can do it. >> reporter: and here is something that may seem odd that makes nick's mom proud. he is crying. expressing emotion like this has always been a challenge for him. >> so when he cries, there's a little happy dance goin' on from my side because he didn't do it before. he does it now. which means i bet there's a lot more that he didn't do before that's gonna happen. and we're ready. >> reporter: but lenore can't sit back for long, there's another unexpected change.

your husband's job is shifting to florida. >> yeah. yeah. >> reporter: why the deep intake of breath? >> cause that's a big scary thing. that's a big scary thing. >> reporter: with lenore working only part time, the family relies on her husband mike's income. so they decide to take a scouting trip to florida to find out if nick can get the same kind of support there. >> we went to medicaid. we went to providers down there and asked the questions. >> reporter: dateline is with lenore on her visit to florida agencies where employees are incredibly candid about how little they have to offer. they allow their conversations with lenore to be recorded. >> how immediately do you need those services? we have quite a long waiting list. >> can you give me a hint? is it like weeks? >> like 22,000 people on the waiting list. >> ok, that's a big reality check. >> are you gonna have those guaranteed services from new

york to here? no, you're not. >> no. >> and i would be lying to you if i told you you would. >> we always say, if there's a way that he can remain there then you are, you know, you're really trading in a lot for nothing. we have nice weather. that is about the level of service that we have here. we always tell people, "don't move here." >> reporter: we later asked florida state officials for comment. they say over the past two years, the state has approved more funding to help get people off the waitlist. how is it possible that things are so different from one state to another? >> the funding source is medicaid. and medicaid is a state-federal partnership. >> reporter: sharon lewis is a senior advisor on disability policy for the u.s. government. she explains that states decide how to spend federal money for adults with autism. >> there's no minimum requirement in terms of how many people you're gonna serve, how much money you're gonna spend on this. it's a state decision. >> reporter: so the federal government can't say to florida, "you've gotta do the same thing."

>> at this point under the law, no. >> reporter: what's more, lewis says states split their medicaid dollars between the poor and people with disabilities. she says it all adds up to a system that can't take that much weight. back in new york, he is better off staying put, so they are breaking up the family. mike will move to florida for his job alone. >> what does it mean to the family? >> it will be long distance and it leaves nick and my daughter and i here to try to figure out how we're going to be three quarters of a family. and keep dad connected. >> reporter: eric's family is also settling for a situation that is not perfect, but better than him sitting at home. eric will start attending a

dayhab in mountain where he does vo manhattan where he does volunteer work. >> simple things like setting tables, delivering mail. they have dog working for the elderly. >> while they don't do that much, it is better than most and he has a mix of young people to be with. and he has friends. >> reporter: but what eric and his moch donm don't know is thae is something better right around the corner. coming up -- amounts ligup -- a the end of a long tunnel. >> he is a gifted artist and i see good things coming out of this. >> it is not over. it is not a done deal. see the individual. >> when "dateline" continues. copd makes it hard to breathe.

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welcome back. for three years, our cameras captured the trials and tribulations of two families fighting to get their autistic young adult sons into any programs they could find and these mothers knew the battle for their kids' future was far from over. here with the conclusion of on the brink is kate snow. >> mary and lenore have carried their sons through an unstable scary transition. they have fought for every bit of help they could find. and they have tried their best to give their sons the support

they lost when they turned 21. nick has had an especially bumpy road after depending solely on his mom for months, he finally got help in the form of a state funded program that sends aides to his whom and thhome and his to break up in order to keep his services and not long after, another change. he an bankrubruptly loses some services again. >> our experience when he graduated was falling off a cliff? i said to my husband this was the quich lents equivalent of gd off a cliff. >> new york state agencies put new conditions on how government funding could be used to pay for programs like nick's. he loses valuable members of his team overnight and quickly spins out of control. >> he is falling apart. he is a mess. and i need help and i need help like two months ago. >> after an episode of extreme

anxiety leaves nick hospitalized, lenore calls an agency that provides services for nick begging for help. lenore feels like once again she is on her own. >> all i can do is hope, keep my fingers crossed. and work with him minute by minute. minute by minute. some days are truly minute by minute. >> after months of lobbying state administrators and looking for loopholes, she manages to piece back together some of nick's support team. over muffins and coffee one weekend morning, lenore brings them back up to speed on nick. >> we know now eahe's just him, but he needs support. >> he will always need help, but she also knows that he can still participate in his community and enjoying his team members as they recycle bottles and cans

that nick collects. >> that is about $3. right? >> nick donates the money he makes to the charity make-a-w h make-a-wish. >> he had make-a-wish a number of years ago and that was life-changing for him. >> thank you so much. >> not everybody works a paying job, but it doesn't mean that they don't contribute to their community. and right now, we're teaching him how do that with something as simple as collecting bottles and passing the money on to charity. >> for eric, the period of isolation and stagnation he went through after leaving the rebecca school is coming to an end. he has recently learned a new skill. he is taking the subway by himself. a big step on the path to becoming more independent. >> what are you going to do this weekend? >> and instead of weekly dinner

dates with his mom, eric meets with a language coach his own age paid for by his parents and their conversation sounds like any other dinner date. >> thank you for asking. >> good morning. how are you today? >> but the best news is eric's mom has traded the dayhab for something better, eric has been chosen for a selective arts program called pure vision arts, run by the shield institute, a nonprofit organization. eric shows us some of his artwork. >> is that milk or juice? >> milk. >> breakfast. >> eric has also displayed his work in several art exhibits around new york city. at his first show, old friends come to celebrate with him. his mother, who is finally finding time to get back to her own hart work oartwork is thril snowy morning, they go to one of

the biggest public art fairs in new york city. >> i'm really proud of you. this is a big show. it is really special. >> his art is on the walls and it is for sale. >> very proud of you. he is really a gifted artist and i see really good things coming out of this. i'm so pleased. i just think he does have a chance at a life away from me. this is a new beginning for him. >> for lenore, she says it is hard to imagine a day when she won't be managing her son's life and she knows when that day comes, the responsibility will fall to nick's sister. >> what happens when you are no there the for him anymore? >> i am terrified for him and my daughter.you are no there the for him anymore? >> i am terrified for him and my daughter. i pray that they find people in their lives to help them through that and find a way to make it

as easy as we can for both of them. >> since this report first aired in 2015, both new york and florida have added millions of dollars in additional state aid to serve people with developmental disabilities and provide more services. the families of eric and nick gave us an update. they are still facing challenges and financial struggles in caring for their sons. but they also told us one more thing remains a constant in their lives. they are determined to keep spreading awareness about what parents of young adults with autism deal with in the hope that it will help others. >> it is not going to get any better until parents get together and force change. it's the most important thing you can do for your kid. >> all the times that people told us he would never. well, he is. all the things that they said, well, he can't and he won't? well, he can and he will and he

does and he is. it's not over. it's not a done deal. see the individual. >> that is all for this edition of "dateline." i'm natalie morales. thanks for watching. good morning. i'm dara brown in new york. it's 7:00 in the east. 4:00 out west and almost 48 hours until the polls open in the alabama senate race. how president trump is getting more involved in it. new fallout, what happened after the president made a controversial visit to a new civil rights museum. addicted to cable news, twitter and diet coke. a new article based on 60 interviews showing what president trump is like behind the scenes. and down to the wire. the obamacare deadline approaches with many americans confused about whether it still