tv Absurd NTV January 1, 2023 7:20pm-9:01pm MSK
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so what are we going to do? i called the governor on me so that i could figure it out myself. there will be no help. yes? be quiet. they are needed. well what if they draw no one knows where they come from and who are they to look for? nobody will. here we tried to talk. and what happened, only the weapons were lost and there is authority. i have a couple of thoughts tomorrow in a day we will gather all the people, we will go around, you are already proposing to organize a war in the hunting village. and our cops will be afraid to fight your bandos.
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, he told him not even to think, urka, drill. how he broke into our house tonight, and dan is a decent boy. i took a closer look at him and the profession is in my hands with this computer. what's good? well, all this is good, it means not to rob, not to steal. he won't, i'm katya 's a great couple, but so that your son-in-law doesn't sit down anymore, you'll look after strategic thinking, nadya .
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comrade colonel, permit me to address you. come on already, what happened to you people disappeared, your new deputy strokov godfather dubinin and dna vasin disappeared. what kind of nonsense? what does disappeared mean? where did we turn them over in the season ? there is to find, and also communication from the night, no, not by wire, no.
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i see the questions i answer, immediately in the city of riots the crowd defeated the department. all the same to one you that, and that i have connections with the continent no, i'm officers disappear without a trace for three heads married. in a literal sense. you guys need to do something about the situation
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are you a kid there with a hangover or maybe you have premature dementia, and maxim evgenievich well, i ask you to report the situation to moscow do you want me to report to the kremlin there are no zombies, but against which you are taking measures you want to put me in a madhouse forever? listen here they send a helicopter for you, personally, that's all for me report and take the security forces with you. they also have questions. let's send for these inferior turntables. come here. remember, i
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reported to you that the helicopter is on its last legs. why all of a sudden there was money allocated for repairs? well, your chairman of the anti-corruption committee buys them nothing. and the waves swallowed the earth with all its non-frequencies and only one family escaped on a floating craft. it was a one-time action. and now evolution has prepared a new plan for us - a deadly virus, not bringing death itself, what is worse than death? you ask me. and how can it be death immortality elementary brain dies, but the body continues to live walks and bites. what is the harbinger of the whole cataclysm is human aggression and loss of people. look around you, you see aggression, you feel it, and the people around you are in full presence or there is a difference from the permanent list. what
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happens in the local area? where do the prisoners disappear from it? think about the music, what was it? maybe it's a psycho now talking, but people disappear somewhere. zeki disappears all as if crazy, this is incomprehensible. something i want more and more in the national economy. and away from here. i tell you the truth, the last days are coming, which you need to decide with whom you are zombies or living people for the dead, the grave and death for people, the struggle and life, victory will be ours. inhabitants of lensk. in these hard days. we are journalists, we promise to support and keep you. in the very center of events to speak the
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truth and only the truth. stay with us and see you on the air. enough is enough his people completely moved out of the coils, we will continue to fight until death or victory, and no one can stop us. you're fine. okay, this is completely crazy, but you, we have achieved all our goals. nst is now on the front pages of stolichnaya newspapers on the internet, we were quoted right and left yesterday. we are already famous. well, it's time to stop. and today today they quoted. how do i know idiot? it was you who ordered the cell towers to be broken, but now they are not. internet towers zombified people, we helped fight against zombies.
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safety? lawyer what kind of run? you don't boil. i am everything now will explain. i will answer for the market. i went to the zone from the head of the legal department of the regional administration. we must hold new elections. until then, we can't do anything. why can’t we now this kolobok will sign the order, and the appointment of his two deputies is completely in his power. well , then he appoints the first deputy instead of himself, and he himself, and the arbitrator himself you let go of your hands and write.
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, some kind of zombie turns out to make people idiots is easier than turning them into zombies. radiation we will look at it like that petrovich said, do not provoke people will kill someone. intervene let's go the latest news. as it became known to our editors, the leadership of the city and the commanders of power units. including the chief of the zone left the ensk for a helicopter at the moment. we are absolutely right. it is known that the city is blocked from all sides video it is an absolute quarantine all contact with the mainland is cut off all forms of communication are disabled so that
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the residents of the city and the personnel of the zone cannot transfer. i will remind the truth of his information outside the quarantine territory. how it all started first in the local zone. there was an outbreak of a deadly infection of the zombie virus , many prisoners died and the guards did not take their corpses out at night into the taiga and buried them there. after that, instead of the dead, artists representing convicts were brought to the zone, then the police ate the infected mammoth. with the same virus, the epidemic began to mow down the police, part of the dead in the consequences lived and poses a threat to living people because of its terrible aggressiveness carnivorous and their high contagiousness. listen to the next newscast in exactly 40 minutes. that's where they disappeared, the dna of the first castle we guys. and what will we do now without a boss, we will all die from where this virus comes from? come on, what are we going to do? i’m here, and i’m not even an officer, i
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understand, it's too late, something to hide the situation went very far. well, it's true, throw the real artists away, but no one died, there was no epidemic, then, where the real prisoners were taken somewhere by train, where they now don't know, well, you understand, yes, she herself knows almost nothing or simply does not want to tell us or cannot. i'm telling the truth, so all the games are over, there's nothing more to do here, throw the zone artists. you're an idiot if you don't know what the hell to guard them at all.
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chief vertukhay that is the chief of police. please, he is in charge of the village hearth. well, that is finance and supply. what, yes, how, in short, your former boss plundered a net zero. at their own neighbors in the village, so that according to all laws, that according to criminal laws, even thieves, even humanly there is rat-keeping, they will answer for everything to the people,
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where we are going to take the money from the arrested rats. they have everything full, well, there are cars. we'll come to the rally again, we'll see, we 'll listen. listen to the crowd. your car will turn over in an instant. people don’t really like cops lately, but here kiss to death here in the next block of the hospital in
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now i see. and who is with you? vanka my partner? the rest of my friends are family? and neighbors. we really need your help to remember us. and i knew it would. well, what exactly do you need in the city, and here we have trailer with women with kids. i know what's going on in the city. well, we have what next we only need to hide the women and children at your place, and then we will return to the city and try to restore order there.
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you are not cold, honey, why are you freezing yourself? well, quietly, quietly, quietly, come on, come on, what are you? yes , we never even had a case, we somehow dropped paddy wagons at the station, we were late for 40 minutes, and we were on damp ground for 40 minutes. yes, they sat on a frosty thirty, let a you know everyone got sick.
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by stone we will build everything that we want with the brightest colors of hundreds of paintings, everyone who is still able to love will definitely love, we will shoot like stars at us in the night sky. we stand on tiptoe and reach for sun by hand. we are like ringing raindrops that have become huge records. if all the lamp is sewn up, there will be no darkness left, and everything that began as a dream will certainly come true.
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oh, of course, i knew that sooner or later your new police would lose control over the city, but so much so, when the inter-gender police, such jambs, never borya what about the police or the police? it's my fault. that's exactly what started it all because of your idiotic radio appearances. by the way a. why do you journalists. it took these rumors pogroms panic. i didn't know it would all work out like this. i just wanted to raise the rating to attract additional advertising so that the federal media would refer to us. so this is
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the convoy will not leave for several days. and in general, we quit our jobs here, they love us better, they respect us here, and in general it ’s more pleasant to do something good than to guard prisoners. well, yes, i also can not have my choice. there, grinya has to feed the village out, he has no time for a pig in the ministry of internal affairs. so comrade boss. excuse me, we continue our spring
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type well, the citizens of the heads of physical education understand this, you are a judge, and you are a prosecutor. so far, yes, but in light of recent events, we are no longer very sure of this. but this is correct, which means that it is necessary to hold a trial against the chiefs of police, the bandits of the hooves, the former head of the village, well, and their sixes. this is not so easy to do,
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of these devils and decided on the gangway. to determine which tank of the heads of the garbage the head of the village as reptiles of the first category to award according to the gold piece of the total the rest of the devils to be recognized as reptiles, to close the second category for 8 years on one face, the verdict is final and others sources cannot be reversed. take away
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divorced everything. my friend managed to gain a foothold in the prison, but this is not enough. evil creatures, the enemies of the human race, go to war with their teeth, sharpen their claws ; we didn't sign up here to escape the big cops zombie, please. true faith in our just cause but know it will come, now
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listen to me, what are we going to do? let's arrange together all a real fortress, so that we can hold out for a year of siege from the unclean, bring food here, collect weapons, bring stones and pitch on the walls, go and all the faithful and pure. tell them to come here and tell them judgment day is on the doorstep. and only thanks to the timely intervention of the teacher, we with great difficulty managed to take the situation under control. all carriers of zombie viruses are isolated in the zone and taken under special protection, and all sources of harmful radiation that allows the virus to mutate us are almost completely destroyed. now
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we need to think, as a zone from these crazy rescuers, what is there to think, comrade colonel, if they could get here from there , we can do everything there, yes, they exactly, just over there the boiler will turn out to be on this one, just need to go at the gate more. well, in the sense of deceiving them, they will think that we went there, and the exit is here.
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how is that? they returned from the north. they could break their legs all over the country and even new convicts were escorted from time to time. yes , they say no firmly. we embarked on the path of correcting them. well, they were condemned to be in the zone, so they will be in the zone, only as guards. all as the court ordered. and what? you have nowhere for me to run, and yes, the jack of rights could have escaped. they fled and returned. yes , just one question. and who will now act as head of the communion code instead of dubinin
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return it, but to no avail. with what a special commission was created to restore order and justice in our city , they chose me as the chairman of the commission. how again and emergency judge ask? i see the barrel pulls out and ambush sits under my apartment. well, i immediately realized it would wet me i decided to leave the forest, and i kept the stones and handed them over to the commission, please release me from
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today at 21:00 on ntv, their comrades, er, members of the commission, instructed me to announce our general decision. so, all involved provocations , huge beatings, close dubinin in the ensk zone for a period of 5 years for trying to makarek alaska to close a dozen psychics for eight journalists karina bogdana to be recognized as
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victims of idiocy and release from real life, but assign 300 hours of corrective labor to restore and repair the building of the local police department. sorry police. the commission made a decision well, we, in turn, report. that we return to the city and to the official service of the ministry of internal affairs is overcome. and we recognize the police
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