we went into an area near the baghdad stadium this key came into our area and actually stopped about seventy five meters in front of my vehicle that tells you how far the vehicle came into our perimeter. and. which is we lit it up. we had three of the. victims in the right key that they were expiring rapidly we pulled them out of the car and we started doing it for a state i called a corpsman the corpsman came and got the three bodies and took them back to the patel you and surgeon corpsman came back dump the bodies on the side of the road and went over to the corpsman. what do you all do and how can you bring him back you need to get him out of your you need to get him back to

an area where they can see a surgeon and corpsman there's nothing we can do for him so we're going to leave you know you can leave the bodies on the side of the road and i said yeah well you want to do stuff. so i want to have compatible up so they dump them on the side of the road and. move the guys brother you come running over to him and he just said they're holding them while they roll around on the on the asphalt on a highway. and rolling around in pain they didn't even give many morphine. the

guy's brother. he kept running around and he had his hands in his in this and his face. he was crying and sobbing and he's saying why did you kill my brother . we didn't do anything to you we're not terrorists. now remember i remember i just want to i want to close my ears i didn't want to hear just sat there and he's time that he said it. it was like it was permanently being. burned into my brain. and. i lost

that's the last i've. gotten a good night's sleep. the night before that. that's not. the only thing i thought there and then on the. next morning lieutenant he walked up to me and he said sas. are you all right you seem a little distressed a little agitated. and i was sort of not all right. so that i'm i'm pretty pissed off what we're what we're doing over here. and he said will you give me your interpretation of what we're doing over here. and. or what we're trying to accomplish over here. i just looked at him and i said it well said honestly feel that we're committing genocide.

and he didn't like my answer and he stormed off towards the. ceo's vehicle. and i knew at that point that my career was done across the line and i knew i had to watch my back and grow eyes. so after that night i pretty much slept with my nine millimeter underneath my poncho liner within easy reach. me in the dark the dark days. when i first came back from vietnam in one nine hundred sixty six i saw protestors out speak in. i don't want to hear it i did believe it to get away

from it i put in a ten forty nine to go back to vietnam because i was what a charm we'll wired up and i don't think it would have taken a much for me to take one of the protesters out have failed had i stayed here i would have ended up killing some people and i could do it legally in vietnam so i put in a ten forty nine to go back and i think i will look and i justification of doing what i was doing of killing it was all a do on my side going to war when i began to realize that something was wrong when i came back to the states i want to washington d.c. to the white house or i talk to us on aids in mexico and just say that i would not go back to vietnam.

when i arrived back stateside i was ordered to report into the middle health clinic in twenty nine palms the. psychologist looked at me and she said. wow told you a continent subject. and. just about last. for them to label me as a conscientious objector that's the ultimate slap in the face you're calling me a conscience objector i just killed thirty plus individuals for you and you calling me a conscience objector. stood up and i said ma'am if you want to label me as a conscientious objector for not wanting to kill innocent civilians that i'll see you court. i went down and hired an attorney. a man by the name of mr gary myers. and.

mr mars was represented during the may lie trials. and. mr myers in the marine corps came to a. very discreet mutual understanding i was on or billy discharged december thirty first two thousand and three and here i am i. thought came back i think that that sense of a long term planning was gone. i went through a divorce some things i did recklessly probably in the back of my mind i would not have minded down right. but. i went through a period when t.c.p. cocaine are on

a. and about it and that an ancient. long period of severe drug abuse. i finally got to the point where i had no more money. i had no car i had long since moved out of my house and could not go back home. exactly where to go here. and it was when the national guard needed someone in my. experience and teaching people how to fly the armed helicopters the cobras and i was asked to come in and help train some of those folks and the money was. you know fifteen twenty thousand dollars a year for part time work and it carried a retirement with even though i had and

a change of heart about wars i needed the money you first come home and you meet lee forget about everything and you go to mcdonald's you go to all your favorite restaurants and you do all your favorite things and you're having a great time and you know and then all of a sudden you wake up one day and you're like wait a minute i'm not having a good time anymore. i'm starting to think about this i'm starting to think about that because all the newness has worn off your whole i'm alive i've got my arm i've got my legs i'm alive. but then the mind. the mind starts catching up with with everything else. if i myself going through my gear prepping like getting ready to go to combat. i

mean i even look for suicide bombers. you know anything out of the anything out of the ordinary. once you reach that level of of your senses being that heightened it's hard to turn it off it's like being in a cage tiger. i can't back in december of forty floors there is nobody you can talk to you know there was nobody who had been in combat around. i can remember still seeing that grown red glow on the tip of a question and my god i was home. one day you're telling somebody they're trying to kill you and the next day you're

sitting in a bar in new york city it's it's crazy. i took so normal nobody knows it your hand at work nobody you know if you got a you got a headache or you got a hole in your head you can't see when i wrote home that i was wounded i had been in france from middle of august to i was it dad said to the newspaper reporter who interviewed him he was only there for a few days that was to me the only was a at that time not now was a real rejection of who i was as a man he didn't last he didn't make it he got hit. and i think i didn't even understand it then but that started

a defining our relationship which spiraled downward downward downward. so you don't talk about it or do you sit on it. and say i was lucky why didn't kill why didn't i both somebody you know guys do that or why did no prometheus why didn't i do this. i was trying i don't know still and. i remember i was living in the why of new york city totally although i don't just to put my bathrobe sash iraq hung it sort of share. and why i got down was because. my friends. i had made after the war who had been through the same thing i had and i felt if i

did that to myself i would betray. the bond we had. coochie vietnam federer for tain't nineteen sixty six five eighty they call it hell's half acre because of the american boy. that would bend steel their tunnel to island via cong snipers have done most of the damage today was no exception. on the. twenty seventh and for true the framed wolfhounds moved out to attack the snipers open up from such perfectly

camouflaged positions the most of the a company want the whole day without seeing one of the enemy a sergeant was hit in the shoulder and leg as he rolled over a third. were up to it by. a medic and rushed to his as he dropped to his knees to begin given a bullet smashed into the stomach. both the sergeant and the medic. and artillery watch was laid down to screen a squad gone after the wall and it especially was fourth won't it in the help cross the deadly fifty yards with all the fallen to us he was hit again and this was an old you were there yes

it's hard to bring back to minimum. no no no no no no no stress no certainly we're building up to go and i thought think obama grandson. they were. where. if they had to draft they would be drafted so i start thinking of what i could do to protect them to keep them from will. join the military but it same reasons that the young people join now because it is the poor people out of people on the lower end of the economic scale all that want to fight these wars. even though rob a magnet america came out years later and say that vietnam was

a mistake it did not take the brain from me. nor did it take the guilt that i carried for killing people when i went to vietnam i was a car courts rule and i believed what i was going there was the right thing and i was a good soldier but now i'm a soldier on the other side and i think i'm just as good. i sold my soul a long time and i'm just here trying to recover. and have. been a hero for all and i do for. people as we want to you're free to go to prison i mean you're saying you're a war criminal brother i'm already in prison this is veterans for peace chapter zero nine nine western north carolina hoping that this moment registers in

everyone's mind that this is one of the total cost of war. sick food festooned who is a great war political a one wrote a line war was a scene who stopped their clocks though we met him grim and gay and i know people who got their clocks stopped so badly they never got beyond that drugs booze women suicide whatever you want to call it and that happened to me and i think my clock was stopped for close to forty years before i got over that

i was ashamed i was ashamed that i had been wounded i was ashamed that i hadn't been a hero. i never understood that my problems with my parents my problems with my wife my ex-wife were buried in the fact that i had gotten blown up i never i never understood it repressed it totally and then. began to go to a coffee shop and i would hear the big bands of night two hundred forty five and i would weep like a baby in public i had no idea that what i was doing i could weep right now was going back and try to find that the little boy of my teeth and what happened. the fall of eighty four i was driven to go back to fly to look some birds to spend

the night there to rent a car and file and find the place where i was wounded on september seventh one hundred forty four. and then suddenly. i found the bridge that we crossed it had been blown when i'd been shot. i discovered to the hour at the moment where i had been wounded forty years before and i cannot explain it but that discovery began my healing. my generation really repressed with the war was about we didn't want to talk about it we weren't allowed to talk about it and then slowly in the one nine hundred eighty s. and one nine hundred ninety s. this whole thing of the greatest generation occurred it was wonderful you know the greatest generation what a nice name to call us and we forgot what we had done we forgot that we had been

animals for a while. war is about one thing it's about killing you either learn to kill somebody else or you get killed or wounded yourself and that's why i have become to solo the idea of war. for. vietnam assault on us cos don't what may i think of it every day. to fire back from that to memorise still go to counseling for. and. it's it's now worth it but what i did do was madness to find some good in that war . vietnam a me a better person and made me people more. made me understand that we are all one one people it's.

there's a certain amount of guilt i think you learn to live with you compartmentalize it or unite you rationalize you see and i call that excuses i mean i really don't have to make excuses even. so there are things i wish i had not done. but there's no way to change. my lad. and. when you come to the point that you're wrong i'm sure you're actually much but the more snot the way to sad. and disagreement.

and kind of like the poster you can have your own i. loathe luxury. i. laugh.

so. this thing that. we're going to. get.

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russia. has a reduction treaty between moscow and washington but their final approval. cation resolution by. threats of war north korea has warned of a nuclear strike on the south angered by the scale of live fire drills. plus a less threatening neighborly dispute as a levy it claims it introduced the world's first decorated christmas tree five hundred years ago. for the pioneer.

new passenger plane in twenty years the business news is in france with. broadcasting live from our studios in central moscow this is our t.v. we're certainly glad to have you with us president medvedev and obama have hailed the u.s. senate's approval of the new nuclear arms reduction treaty as historic it's now russian lawmakers turn to consider the deal and they are saying they will have to study washington's documents in full as they could introduce additional conditions are going to joins us live with the details hi there now what do we what can we expect in today's session from russia's lawmakers what are they likely to bring.