i am a transsexual woman. now i'm going through a transition period the so-called hormonal stage when i need to adjust to society as a woman that's why i need to change my sex and my passport in the past but. there's been no surgery as you know no not yet it's very expensive and i don't have enough money with their money to the right amount first and with the name you're the overt of in my passport people treat me as though i'm a non-person and i can't find a job lawyers don't even believe it's really my passport and. here's substantiate your claim with a number of medical reports could you present them to me so far you have only presented a medical report from professor going to cenk us clinic or so i thought that report would be enough i didn't think i'd need anything else if you refer to it as

a medical statement than you need to have a document proving this clinic really is a magic oregon has ation authorized to issue such reports. i don't have such a document will you be able to present it yes i think so when will you be able to present it like concerned exact date i'll have to submit a request in five days ten how many. about ten probably it's hard to say exactly the cases are joined to the ninth of september if the clinic refuses to provide you with the necessary documents as the court all sign an enquiry. didn't it surprise you that they claim you could north a request from the yes it did i don't know why they didn't reply it's so strange i can't comment i don't know what happened if i had the opportunity i would have done

it myself what are you going to do next we sure would we're not going to call the clinic and the local registry office try to explain the situation because it's delaying the surgery. i told you it to think twice because there was an opportunity that she wouldn't be allowed on a plane with or that the police would detain her and i told her to wear no make up tearing check in and on the plane she could have put it on later and not before

customs a lot of women wear trousers now. put on a travis high heeled shoes and make up anyway. she was looking for trouble because . of course they didn't want to allow jewelry through the customs because what they saw didn't conform to what her passport sat the ground they call for doctors to check because they saw a woman who according to the documents was a man. i am not recognized in russian law jazz nothing there about me or people tell me that anything which is not expressly forbidden must be allowed so i figured that nothing

was forbidden to me because there's no law saying to the seller of your can go through customs in a dress and high heels so i could do it and i did. that here. in london to start a fight stand my feet or throw shoes at them i just looked at them smiled and waited till i saw your face. and you were so serious so concentrated. i'm convinced the top thoughts materialize your fifth your fright of something sooner or later you'll have to face it but there's no point hiding the time why do that anyway i want to live openly and freely just live the interim section as a temporary state on a woman and very happy about that whole foods is i have all my documents my possibly nothing more than three.

ladies and gentlemen please give up your seats to elderly passengers mothers with children full pregnant ladies. but when you were ten when you were thirty you mom i didn't know anything then understand. you had a family you were a normal person. i'm still a normal person i think it's living on your own that has brought it all about. and it's nothing that living alone could do i was born with it the doctors have already told you it's innate it's you why would he believe the experts there's no other way you can't catch it all about genes it's a combination of chromosomes and group life it doesn't affect it in any way mum white. mom white quickly.

go through ok let's take a blood test. from a vein yes give me our. most of the most of the crux of the issue is the removal of a penis causes euro nation problems to be honest i can't even look at it yuck. don't seem so strange just a kind of realistic organ. which is it will be quite a long operation because we will have to remove part of some blood vessels and adjust your rethrow within the growing oh maybe we could start with removing the testicles and then decide yes then you'll have to decide look you

know you're so cheerful yes because your testicles still produce a little to yes once the saucer has gone there will be no such happiness anymore. then we might need to insert physiologically female doses of the hormone to maintain this good mood. you need hormones not for general masculine ization or to make your beard grow will be needed as an effective anti stress agent to have a good mood this is the. root of it in as early as the age of five i started to think it was wrong that they called me and treated me as a boy uppermost when i was aware that they were boys and girls wouldn't they put me with the former all that i knew i really belonged with the latter. but it came as a shock to me i tried to analyze myself and came to the conclusion that i couldn't change anything so i just withdrew into myself for the many years with the woman

with one small but very great secret that i had to live with morning and was right that. there's a curse still difference between you and me as a child at school i didn't conceal why i was one of the children gave me a hard time to me didn't talk to me and insulted me. i was in the past with the story of my life is based on what was a great tragedy for my mother to shawn she believed that she had to give birth to daughter so that there would be someone to look after her when she's old nobody knows if you call that was her life plan so when after labor the doctor told her it was a boy she got hysterical and she said take him away it's not my baby she was convinced the babies had been switched to yellow and i saw mom was suffering because of me just because i wasn't born a girl i feel guilty for something that wasn't in fact my fault matias you were.

this feeling to kreutz i was delighted to be a woman when i took interest in all aspects of my mother's life i tried to prove i was worthy of her love and if she could only feel love for a daughter i was determined to become that daughter for her. both of the goals. and you were arguing when we were choosing this t. shirt i was afraid it would be too big for me. to be in fact to size up would have

been better if i told you that you needed a bigger and with a look to the song mommy knows best at least today after i do jewish hair she looks beautiful and usually an ugly one i don't do your hair that well you mean you're not as beautiful or can't help crying just looking at it. come off it do something normal. i'm here at the top and you have a cool hairstyle that folliot my hair looks like a bush you have what you have to look the volume is so nice that you're sure from your lips to god's is. ungrateful pig go away. i think i've spent too much time get to where i want to leave the current life of my own and enjoy the high level i've managed to achieve.

and i have one more thing to ask of you you don't undergo any surgery mom i am asking you. are dry to understand one simple thing my whole body has changed i'm a woman now and i can't have male organs i'm a woman as you try to understand it once and for all. you cut thirteen or it doesn't matter you have to admit a woman can't have male organs even if you come to the doctor to do this operation it's called to me term amy and what people call it it's cold castration but the organ remains anyway. that removing that is the second stay after a year i can remove absolutely everything is just much more expensive. by you aware that you're not that young and i know you do you realize that i could

have died three years ago i tried to kill myself do you understand that that i have gained another three years of life the good woman asked for the suicide rate is almost ninety percent. are they all like that is that they are weak people they are not very strong people my name is julia. i'm speechless because i've almost completely forgotten what i wanted to ask. for the break you'll meet the person who was always the closest man in julio's life that's a father. wanted to be easy if they are if he committed a serious said yes absolutely he hasn't seen him for ages will he even recognize him you can see for yourself after the break.

weeks between thanksgiving and christmas in the united states a con for roughly twenty percent of annual mall shopping during that period of time people are much less rational when they when they shop yes certainly in our modern era people are often spending money that they don't have and spending it on things they don't need to accomplish what they haven't thought. did you know the price is the only industry specifically mentioned in the constitution and. that's because a free and open process is critical to our democracy which albus. role. in fact the single biggest threat facing our nation today is the corporate takeover of

our government and across several we've been hijacked like handful of transnational corporations that will profit by destroying what our founding fathers once all just my job market and on this show we reveal the big picture of what's actually going on in the world we go beyond identifying the problem trucks and rational debate and a real discussion of critical issues facing america by the book ready to join the movement then walk a little bit of. the olympic torch is on it's a big journey to such a. one hundred twenty three days. through two thousand nine hundred towns and cities of russia. relayed by fourteen thousand people or sixty five thousand kilometers. in a record setting trip by land air sea another space. olympic

torch relay. m r t r c dot com. the interview. up to lose. you know. judy it's sort of you all of us want to love and respect myself i hereby promise that i shall never cease working on myself and from this day on to be true

to myself for better or for us for richer for poorer in sickness and in health. i will love and accept myself until the day that i die i challenge myself to live in complete harmony with myself and to lead a happy life. is. good and good relations are good on the day when you've accepted yourself. why did you do boys there was no other way as a man. could be neither father nor hospital i know that i'm a woman. which i'm not ok it was your first marriage what about the second that was immediately after the first and what's more i don't know it's still a mystery to me well you said to her my we i love you will you marry me i was trying. to fit in so yes i mean i tried to kill that in myself but i think it's

actually easier to be a man i know with you it's physiological but if we're talking about living in a society a woman has so many responsibility as. if you have to look good where makeup shave your legs polish and nails you can just walk around in worn out boxer you can do that it's creepy of course not of course but i want to do that waves and a man can wear socks with holes in it to shore it and sweat pants and play park. and who will complain clue in about what. he's in there good and bad well i'll tell you a secret i hope no one will hear me even with a didnt like that he is a god with a huge belly with no reaction he believes he is a cool guy because he can doubt a woman and find another one there always be someone who will be happy to have him

always. the one who can feel i had a number of sham marriages well one was official right another marriage another baby and still nothing more nothing changed about only that i was still the same person i had always been with her but most of all the divorced i supported my child my nan surely and helped as best as i could when we divorced she was eight or nine months maybe a year old. now she's twenty six. i guess i wouldn't recognise her if i met her on the street. who i spoke to on the phone and we had great to meet over. there the more i thought

i could give myself a little treat and meet the person who has my own blood flowing through the day. when we agree. with your i was there in vain rina texted to say she couldn't make it and she had a lot of things to do she couldn't come which was a pity much and i feel so stupid and up said. i doubt a reader knew it was my birthday she couldn't mean it to be such an empty present the worst time for me was when i was forty five it was a tough this year of my life that year left me the best impressions i've ever had in my whole life i realized that it was too late i was way past the critical stage

and i was depressed it's a most dangerous suicidal state before i hit boiling point. after my second attempt to commit suicide failed which i decided there was not much point in trying again for a third time it was much better to see what would happen if i started taking hormones going so that's what i did. where back exactly where we stopped last time i asked you for a document for any relevance so typical as that could prove that the clinic has

a license can you present such documents are not i can't present such documents you've come to the hearing unprepared again what next what do you expect us to do take my word for it. of news but i believe in anything. that i want to do. with an operation the case wouldn't matter anymore. if i meet him i will have nothing to say to him i can't imagine. what i will do if we me what can i tell him i certainly want to say hello and i don't want to say hello julia either you or i could but i don't want to. bring i don't want to encourage him i'll never pat him on the shoulder in an operating room and say go on man if he feels that male member prevents him from having

a happy life he's free to remove it and i won't come to the hospital with a banner saying no to julia sole of your i won't do that when he's never done me any wrong after he became a woman although he did me a lot of bad things before but it really puts me off that i have such a father anyway no matter how you look at it i feel ashamed. hi hello. when i have children of my own i won't be able to tell them that this is their grandfather but i can't go for a walk with him or come to his place on saturday to drink beer and watch football to do all the simple things i would like to do. i did not fall in love with him but i felt it was speedy you when i saw him for the first time he had the eyes of the beaten dog thrown out on the street he's had this

desolate look in his eyes all his life and had always felt he wanted to be me no woman i mean for example he would ask me to stand in front of the mirror and point out that our foreheads look alike and some other things. will appear to work but wasn't it when i was pregnant with terrible texaco's it's the first thing i wanted to know was whether it was a congenital disorder union and when i found out it wasn't i come down with you at least i will have a baby i thought you threw in the dentist after this operation you behave here you provide all these ten twenty thirty years that remain with whom would you let him do it if it will make life easier for him because in fact it seems self that he's struggling with and working don't disturb me why don't disturb me she should have thanked everyone he hold no grudge and forgive everyone if but it's not too late for that even know you meant everything will work out for him or her.

doing your job you are doing now is humiliating which is difficult but not you minutes and how is it demeaning i do my job properly but psychologically you're still a tease i need the money i'm just earning money i know i know humiliating but you can do it all your life i'm not going to have already told you i'm leaving for moscow i've been offered a job that. smothered

your positions for having examined the documents presented to the courts the courts rule to dismiss the claim by hearsay over there from a can imagine it's in the birth certificate. that it's present project may be in accordance with the law numbers up on it but at. what do we do now mum would even name me i know how difficult it is feverish and it's very important for me don't be offended if you know i'm not my child can't you see that i'm definitely not going to answer to the name during trying to understand that and tell dad well use another name when you have one already have another name

in all the medical statements you don't have it yet don't be offended mom you have to understand one very simple thing i love you and i want you to love me too i'm a clever woman i know what to do i've been loving you all my life i've lived my life for you. is the course there when i die i don't want to have the name your ear all the dogs on my tombstone they were there really sets my teeth on edge and for good i know i won't be able to make any decisions by then you know you're there you couldn't move you'll never even get to see it from arthur met them if thought of it frustrates me if you're watching i really don't want that to be a man's name a much tombstone throw in which would be better not to have a drive at school. but he's your son can anyone be closer to him than you knew costs i think most people both feel sorry for her. you heard his father saying that

it would be easier for him if his son killed himself removed from what i think his life is difficult to reason on happy man any suffering over with but with all of that. my name is julia. this is the place that has been consecrated to god for almost a thousand of years people came here twenty some years ago to reestablish and i stick life on the silence. and people feel the love of christ all working. people say you can catch the one come

but something happens on this island that makes them return to it again and again they say the below saves them. join me james brown on a journey for the soul. only on antti. choose your language. of holy week you know in the financial front today still some honest. truth is that the consensus you can. choose the opinions that you. choose the stories that imply the life choose the access to your office. what is the fate of the house of saud its list of complaints against washington is long and getting longer the saudis are furious over western dealings with iran disappointed that obama didn't bomb syria and one of its only real friends in the

region is israel given all this kemah how some songs afford what it calls an independent one paul. ben bernanke he has become a god head and instead of walking on water he's walking on paper. paper yeah. yeah yeah but i don't think we're going to have a lousy like moment you know where they put him in the crypt and then he goes up to heaven i think they're going to put this guy into the crypt and the economy is going to go stink go south though obliterate. the media leave us so we leave to be. part of the scene potions to cure. your party musical. wear shoes that no one is there with the guests that deserve answers from . politics only on our team.

please write to the city little first street. and i would think that you're. on a reporter's literary. instrumental. to be in the little. little.

little. little. relief rally for a year of protests demanding the resignation of ukraine's president into their eighth day some of them having turned violent demonstrators across the country angry that he have turned down an e.u. integration deal. the cia accused of recruiting long time of prisoners as double agents some of the world's most dangerous matter reportedly freed in paid for collecting data a broad bus. load. residents of the u.s. state of texas sound an alarm over a string of increasing tremors something the area's never seen before the damage that is that is going to be. is going to go on for many many many years and it's not something that you're going to be able to do and many residents putting the blame on the controversial fracking technology fearing for their health and the environment.