larry our rob delaney the king of twitter on his rise to fame for me i mean it was a mental adjustment it was really achieving peace with the fact that i was a deadly menace to the world and why don't i get to the root of what made me totally ok with killing myself the hurdles are good things that like it's good that it's hard to get you know in front of a camera it's good that it's hard to have success in like the entertainment or the journalistic for it should be i think plus so i'm to think that behind every pretty face is a skull that will shriek in a box for millennia it's like the opposite of a poem that makes me not want to go home all next on larry king now.

we're going to larry king our special guest rob delaney writer and standup comedy has more than nine hundred seventy nine thousand followers on twitter comedy central named him the funniest person on twitter his book mother wife says dear human warrior found in the yard stick turban cabbage is out now jimmy kimmel my good friend says is the book is this funny weird wet and wonderful as rob delaney himself how did you come to write this well i've been doing pretty graphic will stand up and i've written a lot of articles for vice magazine and then the publisher came and saw my show in new york and said do you want to write a book and i said be a do and so i was basically i mean i despise are two i had submitted book proposals in the past and publishers are agents have been like no thanks but then i guess once you get a little heat or whatever then people started. tension thawing lay they say i will

read this book on the plane will get into more later but what can i generally expect rob well it's it's a humorous memoir you know it's essays about my life and i'm young no i'm thirty six so it could be argued i had no business writing a memoir yet but i just have been doing stand up for long enough that i try to refract my you know world experiences through my addled mind and put them together in a funny manner so that's what i try to do you have voted the funniest person on twitter who voted you know i guess comedy central viewers i think they they had the it would be award one year and then i guess people were upset that i want to they haven't had the awards again they did not have him the following year so i think that might mean i'm the funniest on twitter in perpetuity you beat out steve but and stephen called their yeah which makes it seem like it must not be a real award if i won let's take a look at this twitter picture you wearing a bright green speedo. you have

a beard to. explain this ok i do own that bathing suit i do wear it however i wear it under my wetsuit i live near the beach and my wife and i will swim even in the winter and a wetsuit is a good idea during that time and you can't really fit big bulky trunks under there so thus the speedo i was going to put it on one day and my friend said hey you look terrible let me take a picture and i said certainly and i posed in a in that regal manner and then when twitter came about people say you know i thought it sounded stupid when we first ever heard of it but i thought i'll put up a terrible picture because this isn't going to go anywhere and lo and behold some years later it's still there a lot of people don't like it which delights me i like it thank you thank you larry what took you to twitter well i was i joined at the beginning of two thousand and nine and at that point i was doing i was talking to comedian mike birbiglia last night and we were commiserating about the old days when we used to spend more money

on a plane ticket to get to a gig than we would get paid to do the gig so you'd actually lose a little bit of money to do a gig and so i was in a hotel outside of minneapolis and i heard that i heard about twitter and i said i guess i'll sign up maybe i can promote gigs on it and stuff like that and then as the months progressed myself and other comedians realize hey this is a pretty good place for jokes which i do think it's really that is it's best use is to is to try out jokes for the stage i send of football predictions or make some comment on policy i don't know why i do it i have two million six hundred thousand followers i do it you know but i i guess i don't know and i don't get it you know i get it but i don't get it yeah well it's like i'm like done going to the grocery store today no those are the worst i on follow people and they do that i don't want to know well you grew up in a recession with bodily functions over a little bit do what is going on i can. found that i think that there are our

bodies you know we've all got one and they produce so much discomfort and wonder and i think people try to disconnect they get we get embarrassed by our bodies but really this is where it's at you know we're born with it we're going to die with it nothing else is really it's just sort of our laboratory that we experience everything through so i might one day transcend the body and move into other areas but it's enough so far for me so i think the human body is a cool place and a funny place where you can get a lot of material is there anything off limits no no certainly not. gone too far do you think here's the thing i like people i'm a humanist i try to be kind so even though all sway or or be dirty i try not to be mean and i do think that when i say nothing is off limits i believe that there's ways people should behave and you should try to let you know kind of behavior guide the way you operate in the world but like i don't want to hurt people but i do

think you know if you're to talk about a controversial controversial subject you can do it in a way that tries to make the world a better place so we're talking about terrible things that's ok how do people respond to you generally pretty positively you know because you're not no you're not forced to follow me you're not forced to attend one of my shows so if people do they usually are buying a ticket with money they earned at their job so they do a little homework first so nobody's usually blown out of the water get a lot of comments on your tweets more than i can read at this point it's bananas and i well you do a joke in no time and on the jokes oh yeah and sometimes people are very funny with my favorite things about twitter is how democratizing and egalitarian it is because i can somebody will write something back to me that's ten times funnier than what i professional comedian wrote and that is just delightful to me when somebody and you know a mechanic and topeka write something i'm like that's funnier than me make man see

any danger in that when everyone is kind of a journalist. yeah i do i think that that you can spread a rumor yeah hurdles are good things that like it's good that it's hard to get you know in front of a camera it's good that it's hard to have success in like the entertainment or the journalistic rate should be i think so so you do have to be careful usually things if some misinformation gets published get corrected pretty quickly but yeah you know i don't know what the hell yeah but you also take on some serious subjects why why well because a human life has a lot of ingredients in it you know it's not just humor even if you're a comedian so and i had a couple pretty gnarly things happen in my life one i was in a very bad drunk driving car accident that i was responsible for i drove into a building the l.a. department of water and power by pico and fairfax eleven years ago and i i knew that my drinking could kill me back then but when i realized it could hurt or kill

or ruin other people's lives i said i don't want to do that so i got sober after that and it was pretty dramatic i mean i was in jail in a wheelchair both my arms were broken and that's bad you know you don't want to go lower than that so for me it was time to put the plug on that he got rid of it stopped being an alcoholic well you know the whole like oh definitely yeah and for me i mean it was a mental adjustment it was really achieving peace with the fact that i was a deadly menace to the world and once i kind of accepted that and i had plenty of time to think again i mean my arms were broken i had surgery on all four limbs even though my legs were broken i have surgery so i had a real opportunity to reflect and i realize you know i don't want to i don't want to kill anybody you know and why don't i get to the root of what made me totally ok with killing myself you married to no i hadn't met my wife it thank goodness also good about mental illness yeah i also after i stopped drinking version yeah after i

stopped drinking i got depressed and not. like i didn't get the blues i got like as bad as it gets suicidal oh yeah and gave suicide very serious thought and there were two episodes of that that were real bad and so i started going to a psychiatrist started taking medication talk therapy and it helped and now i'm a reasonably happy person and a dad and a husband i'm here with you it medication hope big time i don't proselytize i'm not a doctor so i can't say it'll help everybody i can say it helped me and i took it this morning before we get funny that's one of the thing when you will clinton blaming the suicide yeah what was going through your mother because it's impossible for me to i've interviewed many people who are discuss the subject over the fifty years of interviewing. that leap. or

chicken i almost would try to read like remove it from that process because when i talk about depression the book i talk almost exclusively exclusively about the physical symptoms because people think like it's sad the physical symptoms that accompany it like i would the first thing i would do when i would wake up would be throw up you know i that my body like with pain it was really crazy so what i tried to do is i tried to think like well i definitely want to kill myself and i would think i probably should but then i realized you know what i tried to step out of myself and i was like what if a friend was saying these things what i tell him you should kill yourself and i thought no i wouldn't i would help him and so i tried to pretend i was somebody else i was like just try to step outside and observe yourself and you know you're not so bad that you don't deserve help so i went to the doctor and it worked out gradually over time but let's go to other areas i salute you and you thank you well your job to those in french i lived in france for

a year and so i do speak french and i just thought it would be really pretentious for an american comedian scumbag to title his chapters in french but i don't know what it means i know and i love that i love that if somebody wants to know they got to do something people don't do a lot these days which is pick up a dictionary or you know a translation thing you don't know much about your wife in the book to read that is true i know because i a she is a civilian and i love her very much and i'm a i'm the clown so if i want to trot out all my insanity i'll die i will i do but for other people privacy it has value and so i just if she wants to do some public be my guest what does she think of your insanity she is i think that she generally is finds it endearing for the most part she's very funny she's one of the funniest people i've ever met she's brilliant so she makes me laugh every single day and yes she's a quote twitter. yeah i have not too long ago she looked at the way that i was

dressed and she was like she's like you know sometimes you dress like a little boy she said because i do and she goes and sometimes you dress like a dad i have to get it she goes but you never dress like a man and that made me feel that this is just such a wonderful insult and so you know they were. i have two male children one is approaching a year and i want to two and a half so i have two boys under three in my house so it is a zoo fourteen months apart to what it is what do you and thirteen what's it like for you is the greatest thing that's ever happened i would do it again in a second even though last night you know what both woke up in the middle of night and more nightmare people are you a good dad i think so because if you're not a good dad when they're this young they will die so once i get old once we get older we'll find out like can i have a conversation with them can i teach them about consequences and things like that jury's out and i had good dad of young children yes would you be happy to have your

kids as they grow up read all your tweets will be ok with me because i think that they're they'll only see those things years after they've gotten to know me as a stodgy boring sedentary sort of guy in the corner so hopefully they'll think that first and then i'll be like and he wrote some stupid jokes you can make money tweeting you know people you can make money by tweeting a link to that book or you know come see me in st louis and then rob will sound off on some other headlines which don't go away. i. join me. and. i very much. only on the bus and only on.

a look it was a problem very hard to take a look once again. play along i never had sex with her rick perry. about. a. month. old. lisa bloom about.

i'm the president and i think a society. and big corporation trying to convince us to consume consume consume and the banks are trying to get all that money all about money and i was fascinated that for a politician writing the laws and regulations tax breaks coming up. there is just too much. of a diet. that. we're back with rob delaney the book is mother wife says to human warrior falcon yardstick turban and cabbage let's play a word association game and i'll name someone first thing that comes to mind justin bieber silly mike tyson muscles lindsey lowe an. auburn. barack obama the boss. no thanks

lad a mere putin tough guy miley cyrus. kind you just. create. used by you political sure your tweets sometimes target huge corporations political organizations you've addressed tweets to some well known politicos let's go over some of your recent twitter activity up on the board barack obama my neighbor cameron called me smelling her bicycle seat and is threatening to leave the country or go to new immigration bill stop her. yeah now how do you come up with that i just i like the idea of you know the all these new technologies allow you to at least pretend or think that you're reading this like he didn't see that they'll never see that but i like the idea of a crazy person thinking oh all tell the president that i have a insame it crush on my neighbor so this is the ridiculousness of that makes me

laugh and the next one is john boehner i like to watch dirty women play volleyball what the hell does that mean i don't know if you know what i was jogging with my kids and i haven't stroller and i was on a beach and i saw some sturdy women playing volleyball it made me very happy and i thought nobody will care but if i tell john boehner that in public he is the speaker of the house then that will at least make people uncomfortable and that's good enough for me you haven't heard from him he has not ring me back on that so john mr speaker if you're watching i'd like to know what you think about that here's the other tweets from the mind of rob delaney parents who bring toys to the playgrounds for their kids. for everyone else and should have their kids taken away and sold oh that's not even a joke i really mean that why isn't the same and the playground equipment enough isn't a sun i can't i mean that so fervently prior to eating on thanksgiving

you tweeted crushing bookends of protein powder and gristle grain down my toilet to get it warmed up for the main event i think that once major itself it does in a way mixed so i'm dipping that behind every pretty face is a skull that will shrink in a box for millennia. this is wonderful that's painful it is here and you read these this is really the grandmother would you want us to really beautiful woman and know that pretty faces will be a skill that will shriek you know but. it's like the opposite of a poem makes me not want to go home. jet blue zionist seed for a on this flight to austin is loring and it sounds like the donkey thought ing into a bowl of mayonnaise shame on you that happened to you i would have bet there was a man snoring and he was in for a i thought when i said that i was like should i make up

a fake seat but he people know you have critics oh it oh yeah there are people who hate me. and we had a twitter feud with anyone not really because i was lucky enough to sort of any notoriety that i had came after the internet was already here so i had seen people and like observed them getting into fights of people and it's never it's almost like walking by dog poop on the street and saying like oh i hate dog poop but then again if i am somebody has to like step in it and carry around with you i want to do that you are well known now do you like fame. defame period know what it affords me yes you'd like. can pay my living pay my bills with stand up money that's that's insane yes i love it i'm strange then encounters. sometimes cuz i perform live a lot and there's a thing i had didn't start it but people will say like ask you to sign their boobs

and i will not sign women's boob speak us i like boobs they're great the way they are why would i ruin them with my signature so i've been asked to sign boobs and no i won't do that what what is your stand up act like it's the book i would say is pretty reflective of it i am very personal although i tweet political stuff my standup isn't political at all it's much more family body interpersonal politics sexual politics men and women that type of stuff life you know life do you have a favorite monologist favors stand up of all time it would be richard pryor because he was so deeply personal and he had such a joy for life even when he was just in the gutter you know in what he was talking about in his own life experiences just sublime so i hear later on to them in a lot of ways and he had great delivery as well if you can't beat it were you

a funny kid. no i don't think that i was funny until i got to maybe junior high or high school i guess that's still a kid but when i was a young kid i was very serious and i read an all the time and while in depression were you funny. funny the first time you know during both of them i was i was doing comedy and it was onstage were were like islands of comfort for me and so yeah that and that was instructive i was like whoa this is because you feel that endorphin blast you know when you're performing and so it was yeah i did perform as i'm told was and the people have told me they could be backstage. was terrible low on walk to amanda's and then go back to be depressed soon as they go off stage i wish that i could dispute that but i can't we have social media questions for you

something you should be familiar with my gold crabcake. tweets was there a single tweet that really got the ball rolling for you if so what was it you know i think the biggest one and you said some swear so i can you know the right way i said i think i'm first one that really kind of took off i said i love the taste of the period but it has to be that was a terrible way to say why did i say period lemme start again when i love the taste of but it has to be on a put it can't be like on pizza or in yogurt that good a baby is moves vague zose will sway goes says you tweet a lot of random crude things that celebrities ever received any backlash you know i think jessica simpson blocked me on twitter because i did and i try to be respectful because i kind of like her and think she's cool and so i would just

write stuff that was like flirty but she just wasn't apparently into it so i've i'm sorry jessica goes even urban from facebook what inspires you and can you make somebody left even when you're in a bad mood. yeah even because i can even make my discomfort seem funny for others i'm a little as a comedian if i'm like in pain i recognize well that might make other people happy and you know being a sort of a clown personality so yes i can make people laugh if i'm a sadder in a bad mood i am her first question and you could take your pain to the stage. you know the first was what inspires you the. brooklyn mater bagel company and i'll be there many times and i love it. at the end of every show we play a game called if you only do remember the first girl you have a kissed yeah her name is tara and it was it was in nursery school and we were i had i think just graduated from like diapers to under ruse and i had superman

underuse on and she had on wonder woman underuse and we were like well i think that means we're supposed to be married so we kissed well where was this or this is it it was on a jungle gym at the jewish community center in marblehead massachusetts. you never know what happened i don't know the moment you knew you had made it. i think when i was able to quit my day job in two thousand and ten that that to me is it because i was already married and my wife and at the end my wife was pregnant so i was like the only making it to me at that point was having money in the bank there's not even money in the bank money to pay rent always had a job by that point i was supplementing my income by working at a call center by the airport trying to sell a terrible financial newspaper i would call people that would you like this terrible newspaper and they would say nope i'm very sorry to bother you and making less than minimum wage doing so really boring the worst begin splurge because

splurge this watch i bought and the funny thing is i bought it a long time ago what is there although it is a rolex and i bought it because i had a day job at the time and paid rather well not well enough to buy this i paid for with a credit card and then when i got then when i was doing comedy full time i got so broken so in debt that i would look at this and i would use it as a reminder i would look i'd say like what time is it time to go to work so i would use a does motivate me so now i'll never get rid of it but i'll also never buy my thing self anything nice again what makes you nervous being nervous. every time i fly in a plane i fall asleep as soon as it takes off and then i have a graphic nightmare that the plane crashes and i fly all the time and it happens every time i fly and since i'm sober i can't take like xanax or whatever so every time i get a plane i like go temporarily insane. i don't like it when people burp it loud i don't mind it when people do it from the other end when they

burp i'm like what. and i know it's a pet peeve because it doesn't make sense most surprising thing about you i have a bachelor of fine arts in musical theater from n.y.u. you're kidding no do you sing oh yeah i sing the national anthem for the dodgers and the red sox of done each like five times. i go to a got to see you as it is yeah i'll let you know next time i do it that's terrific yeah so the real was your goal to be in musical theater and then i just read school yeah and then my senior year at n.y.u. i started going to see live comedy and i said that's what i want to do so i still love musicals and i will do them again but for now it's comedy but of a broadway show if they revived the show you would go and ask you to be in you'd be in yeah i just got asked to do an off broadway show a musical that's doing very well right now but i can't do it because i want to be in london when it happens but yeah so it's going to happen but i don't know where

you're going all the time no thank goodness for the moment yes you know way from home a lot then i try to schedule at some home for like two or three weeks without interruption and then go out for like four days and then come right back so i tried to be home as much as possible biggest regret biggest regret oh it's in this book my mom made me a birthday cake when i was thirteen and she made it by hand and she put my favorite rock band on it this band called danzig and she gave it to me and i was like mom there are go bad as rock and they should be out of cake and she was so sad and i and so she like smeared it off and replaced it with like chocolate jimmies and was like here you go and i was like thanks mom and i wish i could go back in time and be like mommy i love the cake i have the worst things of the day was when i heard my mother terrible that's the worst can't do it the wife would get it but the mother i don't well you do both i try to figure out thank you so much rob the lady

thank you my guess is very funny the letter remember you can find me on twitter at king's things. thank you. wealthy. british science. sometimes. markets why not come to. find out what's really happening to the global economy with max cons or for a no holds barred look at the global financial headlines tune into kinds a report. of

the playing. field in big spirit travels with the flame from its birthplace in greece. join james brown for an elemental and epic journey around russia and beyond. where i think. i would rather ask questions to people in positions of power instead of speaking on

their behalf and that's why you can find my show larry king now right here on our t.v. question for. no and happy friday i'm aaron a this is boom bust these are the stories we're tracking for you today first up finally finally the day has come up ship makes is a long awaited debut on boom bust today and today's show mr ship weighs in on the federal reserve present and future then we're taking a look back and highlighting some of the best hits from boom bust this past week in the.