tv Documentary RT July 12, 2014 10:29am-11:01am EDT
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we had no idea. you know i personally went through a struggle with us i went through all the typical questions that are being asked the parents ask themselves you know did i do something wrong to cause this i was worried about my son i was thinking about grandchildren. well part of the problem for my son tim being gay was that he's actually a very traditional guy the faith was always very important to him even from when he was little when i was studying for the ministry i remember he would set up the animals. as as though they were in church and he preached to them. you know i was hearing a lot of messages from the church in particular that homosexuality
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was you know not compatible with what the bible taught and i would actually just. pray to god you know make me normal you know this is a phase i'm going through just to get away you know i wanted it to end and i would literally you know many nights crying myself to sleep because it was something i was so upset over you know and eventually i did come to the realisation that this is just who i was this is who i was born to be. i think the truth is hard to suppress and the truth is that homosexual relationships. do have carry with them risks of health problems mental and physical health problems and other these other social pathologies the truth is people are not born gay the truth is that homosexuals sexual orientation can change and. and i don't i have faith that the truth cannot be
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suppressed forever. it's moms may be on far away because she's afraid of us. i was just thinking that it's so funny that parents are always so afraid of strangers. when the people that i needed to really be afraid of are like the other kids in my class and teachers that never for talk to me in schools like the. police it's got to go well president putin and russia come under a lot of criticism for a law that prohibits the advocacy of homosexuality or i guess the homosexual lifestyle and we join the critics of the law but we observe that there are a number of laws in the united states that can be criticized along exactly the same laws it's another the national level but many of our states are provinces have laws that prohibit the advocacy or positive depiction of homosexuality in the
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educational system for young people states like utah which hosted the two thousand and two winter olympics have statutes that prohibit very similarly to the russian statute the advocacy of homosexuality other states in the united states such as arizona texas and alabama likewise prohibit that kind of advocacy but go even further than the russian law or the utah law and for example the arizona law instructs school teachers in the public school system to demonstrate to students that there is no safe mechanism or safe way to have quote unquote homosexual sex which is simply untrue. well alabama and texas instructs school teachers to tell pupils young people that homosexuality is not an acceptable lifestyle and also instructs them to say that homosexual sex in private is a crime in those states which is not true since two thousand and three the u.s.
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supreme court has said states cannot make consensual private homosexual activities between two adults across. grove in texas i think that. it was definitely hard being gay i knew probably when i was about five that i. had the feelings and knew that i was interested in guys but i didn't know what exactly it was and as i went through high school and stuff i started to realize more that i just wasn't the same as anyone else and so i kind of was in the closet all during my high school years and through the college years just because i didn't know what to expect i didn't want to kind of the stigma of there's gay john and i feel like in the south that's kind of what happens with the g.l.b. teach immunity is they get that label on and in massachusetts when i came up here and started telling my friends and stuff that i was gay they said ok what's your
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point like you're still john to us so i think that being in massachusetts you're able to be a little bit more free with who you are you're able to walk down the streets with the person that you love and basically being able to hold their hands where even in the big cities in texas i feel like you still kind of have to worry as to what may happen with you with someone that isn't ok with your sexuality and ok with what you're doing possibly coming upon you and. basically getting gay bashed. there are now seventeen states and the district of columbia where lesbian and gay people can be civilly married on the same times as straight people there are fifty states in our country seventeen out of fifty is still a minority but it's approaching half of the states in this country on the other hand the southern part of the united states and most of the central part of the
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united states do not recognize same sex marriage that includes indiana state in the midwestern part of the country first of all senior cheese bread and whatever else first we know. galleries where is my. peter hostage and she sticks with it a large whatever purely selfish. yeah if you know what i mean. like. in the state of indiana right now we have never gay marriage same sex marriage has never been legal public and party is trying to hide and is trying to push through a ban on gay marriage so that when marriage becomes more accepted on a federal level as it already has a minute states indiana will be one of the most difficult states to pass if you want to protect the conservatism of indiana and what they call family values. family research council believes that marriage should continue to be defined as the
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union of one man and one woman there's a lot of confusion about the issue of same sex marriage i like to explain that marriage is not simply a civil institution and marriage is not simply a religious institution at its heart marriage is a natural institution rooted in the order of nature itself it is only because it takes one man and one woman to make a baby to create a new human being that there is public interest in the sexual relationships of adults at all and therefore. relationships of a type of a type that is structurally incapable ever under any circumstances of resulting in natural procreation such as a homosexual relationship simply do not serve any public interest and therefore should not be treated as marriages. well i
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actually spoke. with jewelry obviously. i'm not a very religious person. so this is a grocery i got for you but it's all over. so don't be a prisoner of your religion but maybe. don't be a prisoner of you religious. you know many people ask me about what about the bible what about those passages in the bible that talk about or seem to talk about homosexuality you know first of all i don't believe that these passages that people quote are talking about it's committed loving homosexual relationships now that they're talking about it's rape for instance and the genesis passage of talks about rape clearly it talks about inappropriate sexual behavior unnatural sexual behavior where heterosexual people would engage in homosexual activity which was
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unnatural for them and of course that's not appropriate talks about temple prostitution where male acolytes with prostitutes themselves to have sex with men in the temple context and of course all of these things are inappropriate. but the bible i don't think really talks about loving homosexual relationships at all. ah. i have to tell you that wherever i go and mostly united methodist church as i am so encouraged by the welcome we got by all but also by the encouragement that we get people you know telling me you know we're praying for you we're behind you. just
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a month ago i was at the binghamton united methodist church in upper state new york and there was one older lady who came up to the front and she said reverend schaefer i want you to know that i am so angry at my church the united methodist church for defrocking you. i am actually using that word now as a cuss word. and then she said in front of everybody what the frock is going on with my trip. so by the time my son called me in two thousand and six right after he got engaged that dad would you do my wedding there was no doubt in my mind and i said absolutely son it would be a joy and it was only after i had said yes to him. that
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i begin to think about what that means for me as a minister of a church who prohibits gay marriage no united methodist ministers are not allowed to perform same sex marriages and you know the methodist churches are not allowed to host same sex weddings. i came to the conclusion you know after wrestling with this that if the church was going to fire me that's what they had to do but i was going to do this wedding. this was more important than. my job and my career as a minister. this
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is what we do we kill people and break things. we can see something is simple as people playing soccer yes we can see individual players and if you see the ball. you can only see is facial expression you can see his mouth. maybe cursed. or maybe he asked. for forgiveness for. certain but no civilians will be killed or in. the. economic ups and downs in the final month of the deal
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and the rest. will be on a. secret lover a jury to mccurry was able to build a new most sophisticated. fortunately. about anything tombs mission to teach music creation why it should care about humans and. this is why you should care only on the. street is never really dead as long as it's with us the start of the first world war one hundred years ago is a case in point and numerous ways to beginning in conclusion about conflict shapes our world today. i think we need to teach classes more on sexual acceptance instead of sexual you know sexual behavior and. stuff like that that's all scare tactics stuff i think school impacts you so much. i don't remember ever
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thinking about killing myself because. it was part of my life. it gave me pretty thick skin it also made me sensitive i think to. people that had it worse than i did. it being bullied for being gay it's the worse it gets for me in my life there's people that have it ten times worse. i remember exactly the statistics are idiots who say something like every twenty seconds somebody attends this kind of thing it's something like every forty seconds somebody complete suicide in our country. anything like l g b t q teenagers the rate you're like fifty percent more once you don't have a support network it's like seventy five percent more. than your last and i need it to forty one without ever feeling like i need to go there suicide it's.
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the fat subject you know nothing because in the movies and clichéd no it's really tough or whatever i think it's. absolutely right. because it really is. if it's really fat people just ability. you know that we. we go through like are every day as i happen if you were really lucky to how. pretty supportive good friends and family leave him. although how whatever it is around here you don't like we still kind of were supported or in one way or another
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you know like i have a great family and their dogs blah whatever but you just cannot imagine feeling so low it won't. it powerless and emotional it's just that that's the only option you know and i think that it. it is really sad that people feel that way. and for me especially having gone through that severe depression and contemplating suicide the support of my family was incredibly important that really helped me get through a lot of that a lot of those feelings and overall it's really important my family is very close and i can talk to them about anything you know i can call one of my siblings or my parents if i have
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a big decision to be used to be made or if i'm feeling down and it's my support structure so that's incredibly important and i think that as the decision that my dad made was very difficult and he went really in and took it to an extreme really risking his not just his job his career his livelihood doing what he did and that has made our family a lot stronger. so i said to the jury if i want you to know if i am going to be a united methodist minister tomorrow. that i will continue to do ministry with all of god's children excluded with all of god's children
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and i also want you to know that i can no longer be a silent supporter but i will be an advocate speaking with and for our l.g.b. team members and brothers and sisters in the church and i want you to know that i think what we're doing. in the name of the church with our book of discipline is discriminatory and it is hate speech. because so many so many of our brothers and sisters in the community including my son to. have been harmed and hurt so much and god is not going to stand for that. one. and this one to three of us. i am a very spiritual person and i believe in our country one of the things the foundation
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believes our country is a right to whatever your belief in a higher power or lack thereof so i'm not going to take someone's belief away so if there are seven baptist or their evangelical pentecostal and they believe that we're going to hell because we're being i think they have every right in the world to believe that you know just like i have every right in the world to believe that i'm not going. to take you closer to the student with. experience with. respect each other's differences and beliefs while i allow a human to have the same rights but it's not a religious issue you know it's either maybe it is but atheists that are straight can get married atheists that are straight can get married in our country it is not a religious issue is only a religious issue when it comes to gay men or two lesbians i want to get married. i when it's probably about ten years after i left for college not going to
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church and when i was looking to go back to church it was really something that sense of community that i missed. we started to research and look for a church that was going to accept us and so there is a movement within the united methodist church called the reconciling movement and that's a group of churches really across the whole country. that accepts gay people you know believe that gay marriage should be something that should be offered by the church except a pastors even though these are contrary to the united methodist churches teachings and doctrines and so i. went to a church that really welcomes us and has other gay couples in fact the pastor there himself is gay and is on track to being ordained as a gay as an open the gate pastor so that you know we feel welcome there and we feel at home there so that that's a very secure feeling and we're happy to found that church. say he's.
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here by. all the city he's. in steal your. jesus. christ against us in this room in. the east. jesus. got in trouble for being friends and friendly with people who were discriminated against and who were judged by others including institutional religion sinners tax collectors prostitutes lepers these are people who jesus called friends and he was. fourth heads a lot bigger than some of you have very you know that his same type with the worst
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things that people there are said to me and things that have been said by christians by people who are speaking in the name of jesus christ who use words like. possessed or evil or doomed for destruction most horrible things that can be said. that's you know that's that's part of my experience in my life also extremes. of acceptance of judgment and then also a whole lot in the middle. so how are you feeling right now. a little nervous. how awful come a stressful day but i think it off for a while. so what do you love the most about alex i love that he challenges me. i love. want to put up with a lot of my b.s.
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which i think is important a relationship i mean i think we can include the audio i mean i'm not investing all the time and doing something there where frankly it's going to take forever to transcribe. the only one doing it and you're barely both of them by credit. ok i think we definitely transcribe a t.v. that's only five minutes ok. yeah. and. we were married two years ago. it was kind of a conscious decision for us we knew that. indiana becoming a state that with legalized gay marriage was not going to happen anytime soon we wanted to wait we felt like us getting married was a conscious decision of love and that we wanted to show that commitment in front of our friends our family so we were not willing to wait so basically we did what any other couple would do we decided where we want to get married which was last i guess it also is not a state that recognizes legal gay marriage. yes we have no more rights now because
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we got married then we did two years ago and we cannot have gym memberships together we can't go and be you know next can in the hospital and there are exceptions to every rule but the majority wise we can't keep our taxes together or we can't share the same legal last name unless we petition to do that core we own a business together which is very difficult and we have to like do loopholes through that you know traveling together we traverse family troubles family together we are each other's next of kin there are so many different ways we can give each other social security one of us should die for and be beneficiaries of life insurance all these things we can list ourselves as those but when if we would die if we would become ill our families could step in and take those privileges away from us. there are polls that show that when people are simply asked a straightforward question about sexual behavior do you believe that a man having sex with a man or woman having sex with
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a woman is morally right or morally wrong most americans still believe that it's morally wrong no one likes to be attacked verbal way or accused of being hateful or big it is the effect is that people with conservative views while they may not change their mind they become silent they are afraid to speak out. because if the thing you have built. you know. why we owe. it to time. to learn these. you know like now oh that's right that's what. you. really want to get the message because three of my children turn to. so my daughter
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debbie she's lesbian. my son tim of course is gay and my son's girlfriend is gay as well now. hate for hate only intensifies the hate that is in this world the cycle of hate never stops and there are so many examples in this world that we could name right now where the cycle of violence and hate never stop it goes from generation to generation somebody must step up. and stop the cycle of violence and it can only be done. with love.
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this is about making the business survive. the. corporations don't love your parishioners told hate corporations have no feeling. corporations don't care about you or me corporations only care about profit. people come to untouched forests and leave massive bleeds for the state come on. we're not going to quit we will not stop until it is done
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what is more precious music more moon. this is what we do we kill people and break things. we can see something if simple as people playing soccer games you can see individual players in their community the ball. you can only see is facial expression you can see is now from opinion crying out. maybe cursed. or maybe he asked. for forgiveness for. there must be near certainty that no civilians will be killed or injured.
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christo boy. yes i said it but the boy people double on is the one to applaud still level the banks or their cup of skating ways what currency to so a boil on puts puts the people have spoken they're sick of the elite for all it's own scams in the reagan toxic games crypto boyan is the one two punch before you start. choose your language. because you know if the federal plan to stay still someone. chooses to use the consensus you can. choose to get to use that immigrate to. choose the stories that entire life choose to access to your office.
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in the spanish. visit. deadly israeli strikes hit more targets in gaza including a home for people with disabilities the total number of palestinians killed in the five has now reached higher than one hundred twenty. ukrainian army shelling suburbs of one of the biggest in the country's east prompting locals to flee civilian deaths. brits fear for the future of their state health care system saying a trade treaty will see the n.h.s. taken apart by private medical forms.
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