she's made yourself clear she's made herself available but he has to make the first move to put his arm around her cancer etc these are very primitive courtship rituals i don't think they're going to change it's just that women have to be a little bit clearer about what they want and what they don't want is like weaker woman stronger men dynamic something that's just in us biologically and we can't fight it i don't think that women are weak or women are very clever you know a lot of them and they're they really. mean well they're physically but you know women are very clever at flirting women read posture gesture and tone of voice better than men do they are more contemptuous holistic long term thinkers than men are they tend to be nurturing and emotionally expressive so you know you can see a man who's it might be bigger but these days we're not you know size is not what's the issue it's a play of power play of of who is interested and who's not interested and that's

psychological that's that's that's can textual and women are very good at reading context very good at reading tone of voice posture just facial expression and they can run circles around a man just by being charming but you know digging in here by suggesting that cetera . and i think they will continue to do it women are extremely powerful we just don't advertise. so canadian clinical psychologist john peterson claims that women really prefer a strong partner over a weak one and when they end up with a soft man they end up dominating and being miserable is dominating in a relationship just not a female thing generally speaking i mean probably are exceptions i don't like somebody who aren't. i don't know really what you mean by dominating i mean. you can dominate by having much more money but you know you can be the president of

the bank but you can come home and be dominated by the wife in the living room. you know you will die you think you are you can and usually the last one here at home you are the one who's in charge taking all the decisions and making all this is just for the two of you. well the data really show that the finest relationships are where there's a real balance in the relationship is soon as it begins to get skewed you begin to have real problems i mean the woman might dominate in many ways and so the man is going to object to that and go elsewhere men might dominate in the women is going to object or. go elsewhere so the finest relationships are in which there's a balance of power and each person respects the other when i asked singles what they're looking for in a partner the number one thing i ask that year after year in this massive study is respect and when you really respect somebody when you feel you can confide in them when they make you laugh when you find them physically attractive and when they

make enough time for you you're going to have a good relationship is a matter of fact you know i studied the brain i put people in brain scanners and studied the brain circuitry of romantic love and attachment and i did one study of long married people and these are the three brain regions that are linked with long term happiness psychologists will say all kinds of things about what makes you happy but this is what the brain says these are the three brain regions that become active in a long term marriage happy marriage brain region link with empathy a brain region lead with controlling your own stress and your own emotions and a brain region linked with what i call positive illusions the ability to overlook what you don't like about somebody and focus on what you do we found it those three brain regions just as active in men as in. i mean if you can express them but they control yourself and overlook what you don't like you're likely to have a happy partnership from both men and women all right we're going to take

a short break right now when we're back we'll continue talking about the evolution of human relationships with helen fisher as apologists and human behavior researchers say to you. in a world of big part of the law and conspiracy it's time to wake up to dig deeper to hit the stories that mainstream media refuses to tell more than ever we need to be smarter we need to stop slamming the door on the bats and shouting past each other it's time for critical thinking it's time to fight for the middle for the troops the time is now for watching closely watching the

hawks. it's a very rough terrain you saw it's rough climates and you have to find suitable to the front. it was gunshots on top of them and so many friends they would have been winning and i've been in need not. apply i don't think anything will back up. you know i don't when you see it but a body in this room is ready to participate in the good. old truly good wouldn't. you don't think about these three of these soldiers on no you've got three it's like yeah and you know i do and the other patients.

and we're back with dr helen fisher anthropologist and human behavior researcher discussing gender roles and the changes romantic relationship changer in today's world no helen what is it what it's like when your partner is a country's leader what other day in a mix of such a relationship i mean do you just naturally have to submit more out of the way. it's going to depend on the relationship i mean somebody like macross hunt in france gets a great deal of guidance from his wife you know she's really schooled him on how to give a speech they have all kinds of conversations about what the right thing to do is under certain circumstances she's very much of a partner in his political world and his political life and his style of leadership so actually i think that mccrone and his wife. the future and i think that somebody

like trump and melania his wife is the past. apparently plays almost no rule in any of his decisions. doesn't appear as if she makes any kind of public appearances that she doesn't need to it doesn't seem as if she is in any way playing any leadership role. as a spouse so i think there's all kinds of different forms of leadership i know with a former american president yes i want to and i want to as well if was very useful to him i want to go actually step by step to constructing each one of those relationships that you brought up but we'll start with a bomb a dynamic because there's a lot more of an equal partnership well at least that's how it looked from the outside for instance with trump like you've said well this man power why is your approach to power sharing in the relationship so different. oh very different

people you're talking about obama obama and well very different. obama's and they. will trump is a very high testosterone guy is also a very high dose i studied the brain circuitry of personality and we've evolved styles of thinking and behaving like with the dopamine serotonin to test around an estrogen system and trump is why i'm and i'm not as a psychoanalyst but the bottom line is it's pretty clear that he's very high testosterone and very high dove a mean very impulsive man apparently quite narcissistic and not interested in sharing power he didn't pick a woman who appeared to be interested in his powers i don't know whether she was interested in his money he's probably quite charming in bed who choose to know but they are not a a leadership couple the way say obama is obama is a much more high estrogen man he's a very verbal e skilled good very good people skills he was always interested in the little guy

who would go you know kitchen to kitchen talking to people in the suburbs and and the hinterlands trying to figure out what they needed he's a touchy feely guy who has tremendous compassion for. a whole lot of people and he married a woman who shares his values and is a very strong woman she is i think more high testosterone than he is he's got a lot of opinions he respects her opinions and they've done it as a team apparently when obama was first approached to become president one of the first things he said i have to ask michelle will it be ok with michelle is she going to be interested in doing this with me i don't expect that trump every. well i'm sure she or her partner in this. latest scandal is going trump's presidency firing fieri claims milady am broke down in tears when her husband's victory was announced apparently not of joy i mean being the first lady the president's wife really that bad. well i think that the. going to depend on who you

are and what you want i mean if you want to play a big role in world politics you're interested in changing the world. doing a great deal for humanity you would probably see it as an enormous opportunity and i my guess is that michelle obama saw it exactly that way whereas malani it probably wants a relatively comfortable life in which she can raise up her son and have some peace and quiet and she's not going to get that this way when he became president apparently when he learned that he was president the first thing he did it is go in and talk to her about it to burst into tears so i don't know whether she did or didn't didn't but she's not taking a huge active role the way other president's wife has which is a good indication that this is a power trip that he's enjoying he's enjoying it by himself he did not choose a woman who wants to participate in this part of his life and perhaps they're both comfortable with her staying out of the picture and him jumping in so every single relationship is going to be different they're going to see power differently

they're going to say their roles in the marriage differently and their roles in society different so i think this is a very important time in human evolution where both men and women can choose to expand their roles in all kinds of ways and we're seeing that quite a right of different sites of partnerships including obama and trump well and then there are man who are husbands and leaders like angela merkel or margaret thatcher what do you think is their role in alabama can you really be a macho alpha male when your wife pretty much runs health of the free world. it's entirely possible that they didn't want to show male. i believe that. i mean both of these women are very high testosterone women there are matter of fact they're let's get it done is entirely possible when they fell in love they fell in love with somebody who didn't just wanted to be a supportive partner or wouldn't have worked out. you know when i study personality

people are very high testosterone tend to choose people who are high estrogen who want to be supportive who want to be nurturing who want to think long term and who want to be a helpmate so it's my guess that two very high testosterone people are not likely to make a very strong marriage and are not likely to go into politics together so i'm not surprised that. her and angela merkel of i mean angela merkel i think she's a physics or chemical i don't know she got a ph d. in a in a very mathematically based science and she's chosen a husband who was i think also a physicist. and so they probably see a great deal in each other's intellectual concerns and he. appears to be happy that she is. doing what she's doing for the world and trying to be supportive of or while she's doing it it wouldn't have been a stable marriage and they probably would have broken up of. the emergency has been

margaret thatcher's husband didn't want to play the supportive role they would have left there is sort of these days it may be hard to leave because you know. i want to tell you once you are cast in the role it doesn't look too good for the further has been who left you yeah. yeah you know oh dear and you know your i'm going to go somewhere else i want to do physics and you want to run the world forget it no they both picked men who wanted to be supportive of them and indeed were because both women have been very effective. there's something else i want to talk to you about there's a survey by german saucy ologist which says that there is a direct connection between politicians good looks and the votes they get so are we with the wording the same way we swiped and or. and why isn't george clooney president then. we're going to have more than good looks and good looks always are

useful when i put people into a brain scanner we know the little factory that lights up when you look at a good looking face it's a it's a factory that put pumps out and dopamine and gives you a sense of pleasure so even if you're walking down the street and you see somebody who's very good looking you don't necessarily want to talk to him you want to get on your way but you notice that and you sort of enjoy looking at them so we enjoy looking at a good looking face and it will probably help you anywhere but you need more than a good looking face to run the world and you need a smart idea is you need to be a good speaker you need to dress appropriately you need to know yourself probably because we've got some now the don't but never mind. you know to be an effective leader you need a lot more than just good looks so loving someone or being attracted to someone is a really they claim sure of the deal is it can you love someone till death do you

part or can you love someone literally to death killings were jealous when crimes of passion they're among the most common so how do you how do you go how how do we go so fast from loving and caring to hating and detesting the very same person why is the line between the two so it's actually extremely easy when you study the brain the brain circuitry for intense for manic love are actually extremely well connected to. brain circuits to generate feelings of hate the opposite of love is not hate the opposite of love is indifference that's that's the real difference when you when you don't care anymore that's the opposite of love and hate and you you know when you think about it love and hate have a lot in common they both are high energy there's a lot of focus there's a lot of motivation there's a lot of craving to to to when somebody you are to. hurt somebody and some of the basic motivations are the same for both love and hate so they're well connected in

the brain. and it's very easy to slip from love to hate and back to love again as a matter of fact you can do both at the same time you really hate somebody for what they're doing to you and still be passionately in love with you in love with them at the same time so they can actually even go together so how do you stop love becoming such a dangers obsession i mean isn't weiner smack your husband's had with a frying pan for cheating and the infamous words of president trump about grabbing women really the same side of the coin i mean isn't all about concession and domination is love really about that i don't think love is about that at all i think we've all three distinctly different brain systems for mating the reproduction one is this extra but it's feelings of intense romantic love and the third is feelings of deep attachment sex drive gets you out there looking for a whole range of partners you can have sex with somebody you're not in love with were medical of enables you to focus your mate in the g. and just want to time and the third brain system of attachment enables you to stick

with this person at least long enough to raise a single child through infancy together so they're different brain systems and the basic traits of romantic love have nothing to do with power we seem to be so fixated on power these days but when you fall in love with somebody the first thing that happens is that they take on special meaning everything about them becomes special the car they drive is different from every other car in the parking lot the street they live on the music that they like then you feel when things are going well a mood swings into horrible despair when things are going poorly all kinds of bodily reactions butterflies in the stomach and dry mouth when you talk to them real possessiveness you want to win them intense craving for them we know the brain circuitry high in motivation to win this person. and power is really not basic to the feelings of in. romantic love holds host a constellation of other traits and. wow i could just talk to you for days and days

but i have to say thank you for there's a wonderful conversation on this now thanks so much alan it was really interesting we're talking to dr helen fisher biological anthropologist and human behavior researcher about how the way of sexual harassment stories are actually going to change romantic relations well that's it for this edition of sophie and co i will see you next time. i'm max kaiser one more of my guide to financial survival this is a hedge fund it's a device used by professional scallywags to earn money. that's right these hedge

funds are simply not accountable and we're just getting more and more exposed them . totally destabilize the global economy you need to protect yourself and get in for a while because we. will do. little to still. do it. even though it is still united for you. all for school it's only about the looking. forward to one of the.

boys. you'll be on. a new stage appeared on the world map in two thousand and eleven south sudan. gets separated from its neighbor sudan after an independence referendum.

since then between government and insurgent troops has never stopped it is in fact a continuation of a much older struggle between different tribal factions. yeah . ok we go. ok it was gunshots one time demand for fifteen match so many fresh. broken so the one is going to directly to the left doesn't go to the chest and gesture was. lost on me and he's going well ok we go. to move on trying to do opposites but he just. blushed going in which

not good to put out so well you know. see. the real issues. discussed so. they could meet. tree. into in the. maternity everything is put together i mean in discovery the. queen there's no infection you see the face you still. only see it from the same people second degree on the face. i think you seem to grow up thinking no if you're going to be needed i think because you see the only the start here you see this and i think in ten days you can be counted everything needs to be to be to be for. just. to do it. this is group that. mr bush mutimer the cross and when you were all under the most trying to show you

can you for the port au. prince next. album. because from inside and from outside was really good and it was a big big one to complete your selfish he'd be seen from the from the chain but like him but. you get the patients you know the kind of all the patients some of them not to be injured during the war duties you don't think about these you know the soldier on the you just three it's like a and the other and the other patients. say.

this is the city of good dog just twenty kilometers from the frontline. it's under the control of opposition troops consisting mostly of members of the chinook tribe . the red cross hospital here is now the only facility in the whole up an oil area of the country still able to provide medical aid. if you cannot. get. a job. out of it. i think you know might. not last off. the top. i.

had. a little bit difficult to. actually. say. that past fifty fifty that she. does not say. that only something. well it's only used to. be since i'm just being insulting to somebody and to be patient with these three old sunday and it will be too much and they fighting us because we have done it was it was just just that them one night believe me and expecting me to move. was just totally i did this much snow at work it was. going. to.

be a description pretty good. but you know i feel like. i'm mostly looking up at sentiment that running up a body will slip through to the. next thing you know you do and you feel you're going to have to conclude it can sustain it could hurt. and injure injuries to the other post the shore spinning fork was crazy too if i was the only two. peas in there that are my friends or some. you were getting stupid off from watching your movements for luke to want to just push him. out if you're going to. ask him to more than just we're going to work

on. this will you. go on. t.v. . i'm going to talk to you to. where. i'm going. to. selling these. would. not be done from one thousand nine hundred ninety nine and i'm a surgeon and. there was this lady. fighting with me today. you know i didn't want to go in there all of the things and then we got to the

patient but this is something about i don't like to speak much too much about these . men being something some mission since syria i've been sitting on the freetown i mean banky central african republic and then finally you find yourself with the i.c.r.c. are you dealing with the work with the patients. right case in this position here and if you really have to. this one took in fifty years ago in this edition of games here. between two. small. companies no small i mean you mentioned that there may never be

a. moment. because. it's really a pain just don't you find. it just function it's become very nice that becomes a lot more with. all the i mean that more and i. mean that. happens i can say more often or not though it happens and in this month i gotz twice like this situation it's seventeen fifteen patients you know and you know one hour a week at the three of them and most of them are injured so they'd need surgery in

one or two days. so we had the troops. in the show looking them. over lunch. was given by some book at least to these people the call didn't cut open them didn't. doug caused the water between the good old troops and those didn't just so innocent to sit in the form of between two tried. he zorro sources including those who are going to fire the shoot got his own kids. and we have been going to demanding the daughter learn must be given back to us. very badly you need to make hats here in for the long and working middle if you have to and lets you show me anything you have a strength.