right there around for. but usually i wake up beforehand it's the truth wakes me. i read the bible and i have and then i try to be feeling and listen for his voice his guidance. my name is billy burley. living here and poke. and i used to work for nasa. and let me show you all around the house a little bit. of the weather over here and. we don't have air conditioning over here and so we keep the doors and windows open for good bit throughout the year.

i was. skinny little introverted kid had a speech impediment and tried to talk a lot of people didn't understand me and my body tomie i belong with the boy but my thoughts my mind with me and that i belong with the girl. and i didn't know which way to go i wanted to be like my sisters. i should be like my fifth to earth and where my older sister started wearing makeup . and it was some of her makeup in the bathroom. and then in the sixth grade when i was. on the formerly teen

and we had a new diving. he would do when he had a chance he wouldn't play with me he would fondo me and. trying to get me to have interaction and just continue to play with me. a mailing a map he should share into a room. for just a moment. come on come in and get you into a room back here you are going to keep moving around come on a quiet bad dog bad hold one moment i will and i did silence the da. da da da they did lay down. go lay down first off my name is. i'm an author i've written eight books so far three of them to do with transsexuality i was born male grew up in

a very conservative republican family my father was pretty much absent most of my childhood he was an alcoholic. my mother was mentally ill childhood was so troubled and so traumatic that in retrospect i was able to look at it and realize that there was no way i was getting out of childhood normal you go and you take a shower and you're there to get clean but every time i had to take off my clothes every time i went to bed you know there's no getting around the fact that i wasn't a girl that i was a boy and that really is the one memory that sticks out is just how much i hate. my penis hated my p.s. by the time i left high school when i was eighteen i was cross-dressing most of the

time once i was away from school and a couple of years afterwards i ended up in san francisco which had a very small gay community and i started i had made the decision by the time i was about twenty to start living full time as a girl. when you start dating people and if you pass well enough the whole purpose is are you a transsexual or are you a woman and my in my mind i was always a woman i'm wanting to date and i'm not telling the men that i'm dating that i have a penis and so when they find out they become violent. there were a couple instances where i was beaten very badly. and i'm a leader of voter center for journey political start our center is very well known especially for transgender surgery and we perform all types of drugs for them

surgery male to female female to male reduce surgery possible complications and one of the. very very. volatile sort of regretful. one on one model on the way in transgender transformation we've been trying all this to to make a detailed list to be the first very functional and then to be. more acceptable in a start the code heal if you discuss of both male to female results and much better because in was surgery we create a completely normal female and this person is usually can have sexual intercourse and enjoy in sexual activity according to our experience more than ninety percent transgender surgery starts to be a very popular. person's doctors and you can you can find up to many drug. i'm going to make my journey to lease to be different like now and i

will be very nice lady or i will be a very strong man or something ladies enough that they had. some event like alcohol or drug abuse or something ladies. get away from a seizure of a new beginning to this the main milestone was finding a doctor who would give me the hormones if i get the hormones and female crosstabs hormones my life will be perfect and then you think well if i can only get my voice get my male voice up here then that that'll make me you know just happy and then you think the next thing is well if i can get breast implants. that's all i need it's never enough and finally if you. gone through the therapy and you can convince a doctor to start you know you go and you have a sex change i had my sex change in one thousand nine hundred ninety and in the

back of my mind i didn't think i thought it might be like all the other stuff i had done but i was hoping just hoping it would make me feel complete. and i want to get it. so why would you tell your neighbor that you did something that was so stupid it's absolutely ridiculous to tell a neighbor hey i was. transition pretty embarrassing you go through a gender change to be that stupid to believe that you can actually change genders you get to be pretty. quick to handle the truth. i was born in los angeles family good people i was taken to my grandmother's house

quite frequently as my parents like to go away on the weekend they like to camp and fish. became interested in my grandma's house. and i mentioned something to her about that so she decided to make me a purple dress to put it on and wear the dress i finally got so interested and excited about wearing a dress that i get tired of waiting till i was going to go to grandma's house to secretly crush strips so i snatch the dress home my mom found the dress. i was never allowed to go to grandma's house again. to change my name secretly when i was about thirteen years old to crystal probably in my late twenties. i started to talk to doctors about hormone therapy and i began to take hormone therapy thirty five years ago there wasn't much information and we

concluded that based on everything that was available at the time. undergoing hormone therapy further hormone therapy and gender reassignment surgery would be the answer to resolve this quote gender identity disorder that's when i in april of one nine hundred eighty three i underwent the gender reassignment surgery by dr biber in trinidad colorado it was amazing i felt like the world had been lifted from my shoulders and it was really wonderful the only thing i don't know is was it all the medication from five hours of surgery that made me feel this way or was it because i had gone through the surgery because you're pretty heavily medicated my. female name at the time was laura jensen.

appearing into the abyss the syrian arab army is determined to liberate did live and to eliminate the terrorists they are essential in ending this international proxy war the u.s. and its regional allies are dead set against this why is the trumping ministration siding with parents. i've been saying the numbers means they matter us is over one trillion dollars and. more than ten white collar crimes happen each dish. eighty five percent of global wealth if you want to be ultra rich eight point six percent market saw a thirty percent rise last year some with four hundred to five hundred three per second per second and bitcoin rose to twenty thousand dollars. china's building two point one billion dollars. ai industrial park but don't let the numbers overwhelm. the only number you need to remember is one business shows you can't afford to miss

the one and only. in twenty forty you know bloody revolution to the demonstrations going from being relatively peaceful political protests to be creasing the violent revolution is always spontaneous or is it. spilling into a. president recalls the events of twenty four. those who. had invested over five billion dollars to assist ukraine in these and other goals that will ensure a secure and prosperous and democratic. led .

church one day. three four years ago now and i get to email it said i'm ready to commit suicide can you help me and it was a transgender who lived their life transgender life for two or three years and was totally discouraged i was actually exchanging information and talking with him on some level up to five times a day to keep him from committing suicide he eventually restored is why he did transition back this is my entire office straight here my computer my desk my chair my slippers and this. it's where i sit and work i don't need any more than this everything that i do is right here on the computer or on the phone talking to

people i did transition now for twenty five years longer and so it was when i did transition. everything began to make sense to me and when i realized that how important it was to de transition to become psychologically emotionally and socially a healthy person that i wanted others who wanted to do transition to have a way to come back to that same experience that i have and if they have regret and want to transition i have built a website for them sex change regret com. in our area. yeah we're doing we're doing good billy contacted me by email like most people do and we began to exchange information and i talked to a moment phone his story was just like my he was sexually abused i was

sexually abused and that was kind of the trigger point of changing genders. the kid. gets clothes on. seven years after transitioning to woman and woman. started thinking ok i've been doing this for seven years and. my problem should've gone away from by now but they had me and i actually had more problems at that point another problem is just trying to pass. trying to do my hair and thrive. trying to do my makeup just. trying to look just right to where people would not be and confortable because you can see when people identify you as being

transgendered. this isn't why. nothing has really changed i'm still struggling i was better off if i was before the surgery before the hormone treatment it was a bad point five years after the surgery they are about i started to have about changing back that's my student id. and so now it's women that i had a really big adam's apple heavy brown. pretty big. the idea after i had third. and then when i was transitioning back to mail. in louisiana the driver's license i had

a lot of other pictures from that period but one day. when i was in my office looking at the pictures of me back during this period seventy eight years as being female it was so discouraging that i wasted so much my life in this particular period doing all of. that just in that state that i was in and i raised all of the pictures that i had with the computer and destroyed the pictures of me from that period to try to write that period of my life with god's help i went through the change and i went back to being in may. so i went through surgery and on the bad side of it was in so much pain. and so much discomfort read to grab it. more in the earth.

and then when he entered. life. to me it was growth but it was. in the paperwork to me. when i had the surgery done initially he gave me the paperwork ok. i'm sixty years old there's no reason for me after a lifetime of being in transition to go and start living dressing as a man a name. there's there's there's no there's no. there's no benefit but there is a benefit and standing before an audience of young kids and college who are considering this. and saying to them ok i'm the real deal i started living when i as

a woman when i was twenty i've lived forty years of my life i have breast augmentation i've had genital surgery i've had forty years of hormones all of it has not made my life any better it's never solved the problem you break your your left leg you go into a doctor's office and under the transsexual rule of medical treatment they say this is your new normal and we're going to break your right leg too i think it's safe to say that when somebody has been cross stressed and affirmed physically abused and sexually abused that psychotherapy is the most needed therapy hormones and surgery. was already. legally.

her daughter came over to my four dollars shipping christian athletes meeting and it was bigger than i first met her. and that was in two thousand. and. three and i didn't know what that meant. so i asked one of my classmates what does that mean. a lot of my younger classmates so so she said it was a safe way for asking for her to meet up with somebody i shared with her my past and what had happened and how i was. and she said ok let's be friends we'd share the same cycle but i was saying we both like doing especially swimming. but. i can't i know he will say he remembers one time we were high and

we sat down for. i sat close to him when i had a shoulder and it was that point. with changing. that it was ok for me to start. in a romantic was me and i did. for. the into mainstream to tween me. with me being surgically altered i. come to want to. we enjoy intimacy in that wonderful fresh. it is beautiful praying for a little bit more right. if you notice. the green is starting to turn back

brown he asked me pretty soon after a few monts. i think i thought about it for not too long maybe a week or two and responded yes my older daughter said. she want they want me to be happy. new i was going to change back but the big moment came when. i was praying and the lord jesus appeared to me as a vision in the area so i could touch him just like i could touch anybody here and he came and reached down to me with his hands and picked me up and said you're now safe with me forever and it was at that moment that my life changed in

a split second. leg of this i'm healthy. many of the people who've gone through this before me are dead. they're still struggling. with their identity and i'm alive and well and healthy and married for twenty one years to my wife. three dimension restoration and i'm helping other people what other thing that's better in life when you're reaching out and helping other people with their life. it is. still pretty. i'm still pretty tasty. i am so happy i am the way i am now. even though i have problems i have

a choice to let my problems. burden me. for too long to see each day as a beautiful day and just to enjoy the life. in his hands he's got you in me baby in his hands he's viewing me baby in his hands he's got the whole world in hidden pain.

to. join me every focused on the alex i'm unsure and i'll be speaking to us of the world of politics sports business i'm show business i'll see that. prosecution will need to be criminals in this show before the pump is all. over you question the threat of fines. by the no longer seem to i mean yeah i mean i mean political pressure on that god you've only monken told to security jennifer knows what the kind of business models used by american corporations jadhav what he's sold on could be mental disease has a new album use the controls and see

a man who was on the scene and the solution. lies up in association with the potato i don't. know took any salsa on those it is just really really came to. an investigative documentary. ghost war on oxy. ministries police forces and city administrations of many countries depend on one corporation and that's what mike was hoping the board doesn't pull from the eyes of god i'm stumped this is not the guns this is not the woods as that's good he got on into this it's just a small club and proprietary software you don't know the source code isn't that a such a security risk when you have a black box operating in the public eye to microsoft dependency puts governments under a cyber threat and not only that something called must put us in more than the softness

of the sense of the zip still being the source of the world the will still be almost all these to all do. with. the us this is the arsenals of the host i'm done with the old vision stopped when there was a sting of phone calls in front is up and describes all the fine. but the subtleties of coming home several days ago who a rocket landed in front of my house my mom wife and three children died i remember how i called home no one picked out ninety several units are killed including three children when al nusra a terrorist shelled a christian village in serious harm up province. also in the program

a suicide bombing kills thirty two people are rarely enough against the local police chief while the twin blasts in the same province targets school goers during morning rush hour also a. frequent.