was planning towards having kids but i think somewhere in my mind i always thought i was going to have kids that i was going to find a wife get married and up having kids when i 1st met lonnie she kind of told me that having kids wasn't something that she was really that interested him you know i thought that's fine i'm good not having kids and 10 years later 14 years later you know to me it was one of the best decisions that we've made no regrets really really happy to be childfree by choice raising a child can be stressful so from from our standpoint i think another one of the possible adds in our relationship we get to spend more time connecting with each other and i think that that's you know for us it's really important a relationship i don't know necessarily that one relationship or one starvation ship is going to be better than the other because i think there's you know some people that have kids and that is their whole life and that actually brings people closer together but then on the same instance there's people who have kids and it

kind of drove drives a wedge between them because they don't get to have that quality time together and that's something which they valued before they had kids and they don't get to have that now so this is tim tim is our 3rd child he was found by kiwi my husband in a parking lot he was about to pounce skin and bones covered in fleas with a big hole and an abscess in one of his rear legs and so he scooped him up and we took him to the vet and he had emergency surgery he had a really rough 1st 10 weeks on the planet but it's been pretty sweet ever since. currently you were actually living through the 6th mass extinction of species so we are currently driving species to extinction at a rate that's about a 1000 times faster than the natural background rate of extinction. and

a lot of people are unaware of this. 5 major mass extinctions obviously the last major mass extinction on the planet was the one that took out the dinosaurs right now we're living through what they called the anthropocene in anthropocene translates to the age of man it's where the human impact on our planet is so great that we're actually changing the fossil record of our future so you know i try and reduce my carbon footprint as much as i can in the way i drive an electric car the house that we're sitting in the spared by solar we're in and that's great and there are more and more people putting up solar panels and buying electric cars and going began and that's all good for the planet but as long as we're still adding a 1000000000 people to the planet every 12 years i don't think that those adaptations are happening fast enough.

sound sumo who knows who to believe. sumo the. new google. the new. shows this to see where. the. you. know the. me.

right back to you wrote about my dog marty at the time who passed away he made me think about family more than in the traditional sense he was a bad technically labeled a bad dog we got go and had a great relationship together and he became very happy and became a totally different dog and i kind of learned what love could do for something for someone and that was kind of has projected me to where today in my life and that song is probably my favorite song i've ever written the greatest love song i think i could ever write i mean we're helping the thing and again it goes back to that whole idea that there's no reason to bring more kids world i feel like bringing children into the world is suffering of the world and with he takes things that already need love with. no listen but something else that you need to give the love to we do our own thing we enjoy our lives he plays music 4 nights 5 nights out of

the week we like to sleep then yeah that's really i wish to have that's really meant to spend money on think it's very convenient to have it so it's a very small part of it but it is very convenient and the kids i got very lucky my parents are amazing people they took care of me and so will give me so much load they still give me the so much that it's amazing. and i really didn't have that i had more of like. people telling me my mom telling me my grandma telling me like i don't have kids is the biggest mistake you could make you know and that probably think a part of it you know. i feel like. my own grandmother my own mom everybody you know that was generations before us didn't have a choice and they were pressured into it it was like you had to grow up have babies there was no other there was no other option so i'm going to take full advantage of

busy having a choice and not feeling like i have got to have kids or there's no other way it's a privilege really to be able to not be shunned for having this choice i know a lot of people they would feel incomplete if they didn't have kids and they get pressure from family and. just pressure from everyone around them because everyone else is having kids so there's still a lot of places mostly like smaller towns are more concerned of towns that's all going to have a lot of babies. i think there's some return all instinct in women because they definitely quince in a while like feel this need to lake. hold a baby bird like you know that baby fever thing i feel like that's a pretty hormonal thing and it's emotional thing and it's not super realistic you know there's this feeling that like the only thing you do with your life what you

leave behind is your your child and the predecessors and all that and i don't i don't agree with that i think. again everything you do has an effect on the planet around you the world the people and not having kids for me i feel like a better suited for that i feel like i bring more george world without having responsibilities that i'm not really feeling fit to take her or fit to deal with i feel. more time to write songs to make music i do i think it makes a difference i think this is this community right here in longmont colorado religion. i have some friends really kind of overwhelming the way that they feel about when we get together on jan. and that that's so worth it to me.

that's her like 10 months old we were at a canyon lands. sort of about a year and a half in like 3 that's her mom karen this is when karen's always came to live with me here in this house he was 2 and a half from them. and they had lived here. for a half years now i do i do not have children i have never been married i've been single all my life i'm really not very relationship oriented i identify primarily as gay but even without like a sahm not very relationship oriented and i just never felt very good about the idea of bringing children into the world because i didn't feel like things were in very good shape that a life was just going to be a lot of suffering for them d.n.a.

has made as very competitive by necessity that's just how species evolved in the strongest survive and oftentimes that involves unimaginable cruelty. i am sure that we need to stop it from continuing to grow because it's like you put you. in a bath a warm water with a little bit of sugar and they just keep referring to seem to put it out alcoholism till they have polluted their environment so much that they die it's kind of sad that we don't have any more control over our selves in our environment. little one celled heyst organisms. were working to run physics to that out so my god daughter and i have been taking care of since she was just a few hours old she's like the best thing that ever happened to me in my life she's

still a big part of my life although she and her mother have gotten their own place to live and gotten on with life which was our plan always but you know after a half years of being here when they left that was a bittersweet moment bitter because you can become very attached to both of them my dad. said she stressed to us take this or that the british and the bill a bunch of. us to. stop the show so here she didn't taste the taste fishies every so i pushed. to which she never happened and i know what you mean and i must get your car moment

in there for sure and. want to talk to the show through my it's your bonus for trivia. it's a mistake so it's a quarter until the. spilled over or does he seem to be arguable that it's a studio actually the person has to be wrong or should stop them spinning. expressed. compared to centuries of chinese history 2 years is nothing but a list budgets 2 years of donald trump with yet another round of terrorists being added to the us trade war this last week news china strategy of waiting out the unit me likely to work with the current american president to. join me every thursday on the alex salmond show and i'll be speaking to guest of

the world of politics sports business i'm showbusiness i'll see that. today there are good terrorists and bad that is the bad news in yemen the united states deems to be a threat the good of those who are in syria the cia and the us military were engaged in covert actions really throughout the world. where they were assassinating populist leaders they were backing up. right way military funding an army death squads there's no. war because there's always a small. profit.

always to the board but if that was weird how. would you work which would i would not work i don't in my childhood like me because in my childhood my mother my biological mother tried very very hard to be the best parent she could and to raise me to be the best person i could be and. i ended up not liking her and i don't like her as a person and. that inst that fact has instilled a belief in me that even if i tried the hardest i possibly could to create. a nice individual. foster. a

valuable person to send out into the world. and they still were not. like me. in. but all.

we met in 2001 here in the united states at work and love 1st. so it's 17 years i decided not to have children when i was in my early fuji's my cure it didn't go the right we. my spiritual search continued and i wanted to have more time to change careers to find balance in life to find happiness and to find some spiritual answers for myself so i felt that having a child would be an obstacle rather than help. these are all waiting pictures.

for you to. go. i still love you of course. that is. in the 3rd world but still a matter of survival a person must have many children in the order for some of them to take care of him or her when they are all. in a well developed world and well developed countries there is a very good social support system so you would have your retirement the government will take care of you and you would be much better off without children you could retire earlier you would have more savings. it was so i think it's a lifestyle and it's very expensive to raise a child human states if you want to get a good indication of that list of $1000000.00 and even. i think of the so that not to have children in my twenty's when i realize that life was thought. that

suffering in some form was a get out to everybody well happiness is not and they just did not want to bring a new life into this world. i don't know that i regret it. you always have a thought that perhaps i'm missing out on something. and certainly my father says he thinks i'd be exceptional mother and we'd be exceptional parents but i think it's harder today to not work isn't. because i think the cost of living up some much but it was covered to be punished no poured forth over it completely completely would you stay home and raise children potentially i think based on my experience for who had children and the children that had a one parent home seemed to be a lot more what better behaved better communicators just seems to be a little more balanced i think because they had a parent they're highly involved long story short we just kind of kick the can down the road if you will. maybe later later just never happened for us but whether it

was careers or. where we've had a lot of ups and downs with careers and causes of unemployment or career changes and geographic location movers and cut all those things just delayed and next thing you know you're here in the upper forty's and you're in your happy with your spouse and where you are i would say that most of our friends if they don't have children whether they're married or single most of them have dogs or cats for the most part dogs and we find that all of us think that our dogs are like our babysitter i do think people are as there's more and more people there's more more traffic there's more more congestion there's not as much opportunity to be out in open spaces and finding those things that i think really help us relax. for me it's being with my dog it's being outside every day and if there's less and less natural resources if

we lose the national parks if we lose those open spaces that i think are key to human balance i think you will see a lot more aggressive behaviors in irritability and impatience the more dense the world gets the more angry i think people get and that's unfortunate for me personally i. regretted not. children i think really you know have a good bond ourselves and we're able to strengthen put time and energy into each other without having to. you know needing to protect children as well. my name is laura carroll and i have a master's in psychology and since the late 1990 s. i've been writing nonfiction and researching the childfree choice and 2 books that i've written related to that topic. and the 2nd one is called the baby. i don't

have any regrets because it's not having children has allowed me to have the freedom in my life to create the life that i want and have the adventures of i have had the career that i've wanted to pursue and i've been able to do so many more things i think than i would have been able to do if that really had been at the central focus of my. title is the fact or fiction childfree couples are happier than a couple of kids. used to be. a big debate. there isn't one the answer that's my. asking the question why does he find the child free choice so hard to accept that led to my book baby matrix and 2

assumptions and beliefs that society holds that judges the child free choice where where i landed was a set of believes that have been with us for generations and it's collectively called. and listen just means the x. saltation of parenthood. motherhood birth and putting it on a pedestal and our society has been doing that you can go back to the roman times that it's been pushed into our brains and our like our social and cultural hardware of what we're supposed to be in supposed to do that people think. these beliefs are true 3 powerful to some sions is if you don't have the desire to have children there's something wrong with you as

a person there's something wrong with you psychologically something wrong with you in terms of you haven't figured out your 1st specially for women your female identity something's wrong there there's also the assumption that we're biologically wired to want children there's absolutely no evidence to support that so there is of course evidence that we have biological processes going on if for pregnancy at the time of birth but no biological processes innately that create this somehow desire to have children and a 3rd powerful one is that by raising children that's when you find true fulfillment in life they're all myths. in my research one thing i continue to notice is that there's pressure so it's not so much a fear the childfree have as much as they experience from others who want

them to do what they did so others loved ones their family members they can put different kinds of pressure on a childfree couples for example to make them feel guilty for not bringing grand kids onto the sea not doing what they did so that they will have a bond of even closer bond because they will have this thing called parenthood when i was researching the baby matrix i looked at the issue of what if you're old and you have no children will you be old and lonely what will life. and what i found from reading what has already been study is what people find in their. years or their elder years in. terms of their well being what's most important that helps them have a positive well be is that they are financially secure so that when they're retired

they basically have enough money to live and also that their partner is alive so it didn't really rest. depending on their children for them to be happier in their older years. it's. just strains. i decided to change my mind and to try to become a mother for a number of free sense of course one reason was i want to pressure from relatives also felt that they really want every major change in my life

and i started thinking what would be at least one good reason for me to create another soul in this world into this world. it seemed to me that i wanted to raise a person so to speak a new generation i wanted to raise my child from the plea from the mainstream i wanted to be progressive parents. i wanted to share with my child. only spiritual things spiritual. me and my husband felt by the sea each with a lot of struggle i wanted to share this information with my child.

previously mostly for myself and now i get you. to give. my wife. through with. people so i came to this world to be. taking care of her and providing for the family. but. there is much more. it's. still the same.

during the great depression which i'm old enough to remember there was most of my family were unemployed. there wasn't it was bed you know much worse objectively than today but there was an expectation that things were going to get better. there was a real sense of hopefulness there isn't today today's america was shaped by the turn principles of concentration of wealth and power. reduced democracy attack solo down engineer elections manufacture consent and other principles according to no on chomsky one set of rules for the rich opposite.

that's what happens when you put her into the. narrow sector of will switch will is dedicated to increasing power for chills just as you'd expect one of the most influential intellectuals of our time speaks about the modern civilization of america. well you know that they were kind of adopted because we're called pirates a lot. i mean they're in the small ball of sticks in a hard pool of chips and it's. not up. to little self to big fish already 90 percent of the dart got any ball in a calmer. concept if things go $75.00 times they do it several times a day with

a clean collar you get an idea. we have to understand we can all. just. be with them this is the deal for you because. i'm doing this because i want the future world to future generations to have and enjoy the ocean we have.

among the week's big stories the united states could potentially be smuggling tons of weapons and ammunition which ended up with militants in the middle east that's according to leaked documents obtained by a bulgarian investigative journalist. and the right. here on. earth or they are. the british prime minister's turbulent week boris johnson suffers defeat after defeats over his no breaks agenda in parliament. gleeful of his convictions on a resigned.