magazine. has changed american lives but pharmaceutical companies have a miraculous solution. based drugs the people who are chronic pain believe that their opioid prescription is working for them and the remedy. to. it was the dependency of addiction to opiates to long term use that really isn't scientifically justified and i'll study actually suggested that the long term effects might not just be the absence of benefit but actually the right because we want to.

welcome too so that the code visionaries. said the colonel virus can damage has not only been a health crisis instead he has put our relationship to the test as well well there are human relations in the post called the round joined by helen fisher and. scientific advisor for the match come dating service. helen so great to have you on our program back again but i mean this same route what tires to be talking about humans and human relationships because before they do that we had some ones that actually shows the compassion and we used to shake hands you know create somebody and we used to offer a hand when you were actually helping someone literally with oh those things from now on using is going to be a sign of careless less ignoring as opposed to where they were before we're. all

this touchy feely behavior become sort of an acceptable thing as a social norm. i think to some extent and for a period of time and mean once we get the you know. the antidote to the virus and maxine's i think that people will get get back to tension and kissing and and hugging each other you know we are mammals we're built to touch and kiss and hold each other and i do think that we're going to be more careful with people that we don't know. i think we're in an age of transparency in age in which you get to know somebody very well before the touching starts and before the kissing starts and i think this is particularly. important for singles because you know when you're married to somebody. you're going to get a virus or not get a virus but you're not moving out you're not leaving the prison but when you're dating when you're courting i think it's going to be the age of transparency and

the day of the one night stand is now over at least for what we did in the head of our that it just like you said it's going to come back a whole hugging and kissing it's just a question of time and we just don't know how much i mean he can take to a year or to you to get that vaccine out that will actually properly tested until we actually start using it ray says before that is a year or 2 the lifetime right physical contact because it's part of our nature like your say so is that a vital non-verbal means of communication and tedious stroking triggers dorf a system in our brain is all those things will be excluded from our social habits for that time for our kids where really getting those and her friends and oxytocin is funny. you know you can fall madly in love with somebody who you've never met in person and you can feel feelings of deep attachment when somebody over the internet

says something that's really in dearie and you can even fall in love with somebody without ever touching i mean these are basic brain systems and they just live within a set and you know certainly you read a good poem and you can still you can start to cry. you can read an e-mail that makes you mad and suddenly the brain circuitry for anger becomes active and you can certainly be talking to somebody and they can tell you how much they love you or that they are dying to kiss you or hold you and you can begin to feel that ceiling of deep attachment so these are basic brains just as they can be really triggered almost at any time now it's better to do the honey no question about it and when you have sex with somebody with orgasm there's a real side of oxytocin and days of present and you can feel feelings of deep attachment but you can feel all those feelings just are getting a beautiful birthday card from somebody who loves you know these brain systems are not going to die just because we've got a virus they're very primitive you know we didn't have 3 distinctly different brain

systems for mating and reproduction sex drive a series of intense romantic love and feelings of deep attachment and any one of them can be triggered even over the internet even through face time so when you say one night stand your eyes over for an hour and how much will we be reevaluating physical contact will become more intimate for more international or an excuse if it isn't yes i definitely think so it what's interesting now is we're seeing the rise of the whole new stage in the courtship process. you know prior to this pandemic people met on the internet and then they went out and met in person and now during this lot down they met on the internet and then spent hours on the. the internet you know doing video chatting there on face time resume or sky. and they getting to know somebody before they kissing starts and i do think that this new

stage of courting on the internet will remain after the pandemic subsides simply because it's logical you know in the old days and they just before the pandemic when you went out and met somebody for the 1st time you know there's always this one concert will sing am i going to kiss or should i kiss and do a whole has it's gone it's off the table when you're courting on the internet with video chatting. you know sex is not involved money is also not involved you don't have to decide you know do we go to a stance a restaurant do we have a fancy drink or do we go to a coffee bar and spend 20 minutes and very little money monies of the table and sexes are the table and what is on a table is self disclosure what people are doing much more during this pandemic is having conversations with each other stocks and in terms of singles they're doing much more courting on the internet so by the time they get to the 1st day they will

have already done a lot of self disclosure which builds into missing they were already know that they want to meet this person and that they want to kiss this person that they dare proud that person because if they had this transparency already so we're going to see fewer 1st dates but they're going to be much more meaningful 1st dates. and. and i think the kitchen is going to start very rapidly because these people have already gotten to know each other so i think among people who really know each other the transparency is occurring they're talking about where they've been who live test and they feel safe themselves and i think there's going to be just as much intimacy between people who really know each other and have good conversations before the kissing starts. what you're saying and describing right now it seems like that they online video sort of romancing that we

got to see to a point that a jury decided to slash 3 months could actually result in to changing completely that harry down of dating legit before a leg you know you think twice i want to see this person not a good offense restaurant are non-issue the kids are not and now you lock down your house for 2 to 3 months so you see this person almost every day on video on this thing can sort of new confession like psychotherapist where you confess and have a need to tell them everything about you and they do the same thing i mean they all this level of openness about oneself has never been higher to to my perception exists in speaking to people nearly oh my god this is huge every dating app right now has a video because it has become the biggest thing advertising lately on the radio with the other person and it's a constable because if you want to end it ages you have clay to stop it in the hideous so we're going to guess now we're going to kiss your frogs by the time you

go out meet somebody in person you're going to know that you know all this stuff transparency has occurred you've created the intimacy with that person and now you know i'd like to go to a fancier to spend more money on that drink and just of his unity because you know we're going to just you're frogs and i do think i think you're absolutely correct that this is a new stage in dating dating creature on the internet before you meet in person and in many respects removing starwood to the past i mean in a century ago people do a lot of kind of talking before they ever actually went out on the date so it's slowing down the court ship process and i think that's going down which is actually very healthy because all of my data show that the longer you court and the later you read the more likely you are to remain together so we may even be seeing more stability in in our partnerships but you know. courtship is always been changing

you are suggesting that this is a big change it is it's a huge change but you don't think about when the automobile change and in the united states by the late 1940 s. or early 1950 s. a lot of people were able to afford. a car and what do they get a really big room i mean motown you know i mean it changed course ship the automobile the birth control pill change courtship actually going way back several 1000 years ago when we invented the plow that changed courtships our critic is always going to change and what's interesting about this new twist. on the internet video chats it's actually going to change crunches i think in a very productive way to write off. scientific advisor for the national day. what's going to happen to human relations . or save us.

seems wrong. why don't we just don't. get to see how this day comes. and it gains from. the trail. when some find themselves worlds apart when the common ground.

every year with great pleasure to be answered questions from our viewers and this year is no different as usual your questions focus on future possible events my panel in a. 2 o'clock. and

we're back with helen fisher a few bodies and she said to the visor for the last hour can they say something about relationships tell them. it's funny say that courtship before was about you know taking your time getting to know each other and talking to each other and what have you take to court to settle relations get so that that is the thing that leads me to the thought that that the relationship that will start during the carter virus or coming out of the car is who much more stable than there was that in the scene before so anyway so they rewinding and going back to basics and this is classic sad story by shapley all dating in the future as their own through services like real life match home and when the protagonists actually finally loses all hope with and he resorts to he's nach maker chaperone auntie to find him

a match will say so finally with a d. id you feel like people may be getting tired of the 21st century ways of finding romance in the old school courtship i say actually coming back absolutely and we can see in front of our faces we're going to have fewer dates because we're going to meet people on the internet and we're going to get rid of the ones that don't work on the internet before we meet in person and those 1st dates are going to be much more meaningful. yes i think you know. i think there's going to be a lot less you know one night stands i think we still will have friends with benefits i meant as a people. i call it slow love and i've written a lot about it recently the mere fact that courtship is really slowing down i mean before the internet before the pandemic. over 70 percent are single started courtship just as just friends are they just friends and talking to this prison is

just and then moving into friends with benefits you know you learn a lot between the sheets not just hasn't been to make love but you know whether they're kind whether they can listen with a sympathetic whether they've got a sense of humor or they can take any instructions. you little between the sheets about something so they start out as just friends and move into friends with benefits and and then they slowly tell. friends and sami about this new person and they slowly move in together and later they wed i mean where marriage is to be the beginning of a partnership now it's the finale the whole a whole course of process is slowing down and what this pandemic has done is slow it down some more but you know it's very interesting when you are mentioned something recently. any kind of catastrophe may says take a look at who we are what we've got what we don't have what we need and i do think that more and more people are going to get serious partnership at

a younger age. they're very very careful with stillness courtships going to slow down but i think they're going to want to know every single thing about somebody before they marry and i think they're going to take a long time understand who somebody is and as i mentioned that you know all of the data show that the longer the courtship is later you marry the more likely you are to stay together research you know we had a pandemic that's creating chaos in every other part of our life but in this particular strain called courtship romance it is it may be a bit of a guest. strict could also be his is so ok i around us and certainly in most unbearable thing for a human mind that you need to look for sensibility anywhere you can and then maybe the relationship and courtship is that stronghold where you can make it stable and everything around you is falling apart and the world as you knew it

doesn't exist anymore at least have this a stable relationship and you can hold on to that and crazy thing that could be also part of it absolutely i mean let's not forget the fact that i mean when i think it also hinted at this before i think is creating a great sense of appreciation for the basics and i also do think it's going to be various people who break up after this is over because you know anything having to wait i mean the the amount of divorces are unprecedented i mean on one hand you're saying going to get more marriage is endemic on terror but then as we see people are divorcing krosnick and immense is that what's interesting is you know it came over in new york about in about a huge soaring divorce rate in in in china but what they didn't say is it's probably also

a story in marriage rate 2 and it's sorry in amount of people who really realize oh he is still oh she is the one we've now been stuck in you know in one room for 3 months and we were able to get along and cyber issues and so i wasn't sure whether i should marry him or her whether i should make a long term partnership of some kind and now i think i can so it's interesting our newest oh he's talking about the story in divorce rates but not talking about what is probably equally true this is because we don't have the numbers there 7 are because we're too to get the ratings is very sad about divorces like it's very sad about. death than love well you're a journalist and so i think your guess is better than mine but. my guess is that my educated guess is that the press really says we're papers and the bad news and the good knows. you know in fact my boyfriend just wrote a book called the power of bad and how you know we do try to sell the bad and see

the bad insect the brain is very well built remembers a bad there's a huge brain region called negativity ice and we tend to remember the bad image for millions of years in these little had it together in groups nice to remember who your friends were but if you didn't remember who your enemies were you could die so the brain is very well built to remember the bad and i do think i newspaper sort of almost naturally tell you about the divorce rate and maybe they don't collect much data and that's a marriage rate either and also it's much more than just marriage i mean you could collect data in a minute people get married right after. right after a pandemic but i don't know if we can ever collect data on how many people decide ok now we're going to live together ok now we're going to start a relationship ok now we've been able to be together since 3 months i think we can continue at it because there's no date on it just not being corrected but i know the brain you know i think you know i i and my colleagues have put over 100 people into a great scanner to study the brain circuitry of romantic love and we're built to

love we were able to live in a lot of people who are divorced a vast majority will find a new love and we're stable love and do it all over again so just and it is making all of us. what we need what we don't have and drive us to making the kinds of partnerships that will be more stable i love what you're saying than elf. adelaide this whole old fashioned corti here taking it seriously getting to know each other and all that the lady said a phenomena of our friends with benefits is not a completely disappear or a well written i have. mostly met of course more afraid of serious relationship you know men men tend to be serial daters. i'd like to disagree actually i think a lot of people think that you know i have studied law for over 40 years now and i'm now chief science advisor to match dot com and i've been there for 15 years

collecting scientific data and every year i do this study called singles in america we do not poll match members as noted was the next membership is a national representative sample of singles based on the u.s. census and as it turns out year after year men fall in love faster than women they fall off and then women when they meet somebody that they are in love with they they want to introduce that person to friends and family sooner and basic mate guarding. when they get into a real partnership men have more intimate conversations with their wives or girlfriends than women do with their husbands or boyfriends because women have their intimate conversations with their girlfriends and men are to have to as more likely kill themselves when relationship is over so i've been trying to tell the world and maybe this is my opportunity that men actually were fragile sex when it comes to romance and when i put men into the brain scanner the way i do with women

just same and even gay people frankly is this is in brain systems the brain system like the sears system or the anger system the brain systems for a minute but it's actually it is treating cat in lies way below your cortex where you do you think you are way below the. factories in the middle of the head there are straight the most it's a basic drive and it's a basic drive to find life's greatest prize which is a mating partner and then probably fall in love faster than women because men are more visual and men had a little less to lose i mean a woman is going to have that baby and you know then 9 months and for millions of years it was dangerous hard to asian delivering a child was very dangerous and in every culture on earth women spend more time you know raising a child and. the age of sort now men spend their lives for millions of years going and hunting dangerous animals so they can see that sound so we are a pair bonding species and men have for millions of years taken the responsibility

of being a good father and a good husband what's interesting right now is you know people are concerned talking to me about you know technology is changing love technology is changing everything technology is just enabling us to do the same old thing i mean all these dating sites are is introducing sites and all they do is introduce you know it's the only real algorithm is your own brain you got to get on the video chatting or meet him in person just to wrap this amazing insight into the world of dating today do you think this denecke could be also a great life where man and woman can come clean in terms of who they really are. and sort of starting to nations you based on that rather that prototype of how women are measured me dealing with this question give it a little extra push the whole coronavirus thing i think that extra push is very realistic sophie. very real and i think it will continue i think that

after this pandemic has subsided and people can then go out and meet in person i think they will still do the video chatting before him because they don't have to deal with the money they don't have to do with the sex they can get to know the person and they can get rid of what they don't want before they go out so i think 1st days are going to be much more meaningful i think that people will come together after south disclosure after transparency has begun and by the way i'm crazy about millennial so i don't know how old you are but i'm just crazy about it so young these days they want transparency even before this pandemic started day want transparency and in fact they're leading the way in terms of doing the video chat and getting to know somebody before they settle down. as a matter of fact 40 percent are single today and even more millennial want self acceptance before they cast feeling they want to put one 3rd of the want to get

their finances in order and their career or before they hatch feel it's a yawn today are very serious everybody thinks oh they're just sleeping around so everybody's always been sleeping around us get a grip there but but the bottom line is that they want i love this term that they've invented an. undefined relationship you know the young want transparency they want to know where this is headed and their date they might have their one night stand that they're going to get rid of what they don't want rapidly and they're putting the sounds together they're courting very slowly this pandemic is making them be even more careful they will continue to be careful and they may at least a decade i don't know a generation more solid partnerships like this no i like what you're saying my sister players and i think he and i feel happy for her after his heart. i think

he's on the right path to rihanna right thank you so much for this wonderful a side thing pleasure talking to you i hope we get to tell me how you decide to have a license from what we came true and what we've been wondering. the following and be glad to show night and your must tell me what you've discovered to absolutely hate his cell life. thank you. americans love.

this was a fundamental part of how our political leadership and our country at large understood the bargain you get a hope and then you know rebel right that's the things you don't revolt if you have a stake in the system. and think about the longer deeper history housings men in the united states not just that question of the american dream but the bigger question of who the dream is for. welcome to the kaiser report 1st on the new year's day so we've got an excellent day on these christmas lights i don't think the set i mean you know i took the money i save and i bought stats all right time now to turn to peek or is the editor over a crack and he's also an advisor at big client magazine. has

changed american lives with pharmaceutical companies how miraculous solution. based drugs talk to people who are chronic pain patients believe that their prescription is working for them in the remedy be certain to. price at the. grocery dependency and addiction to opiates is the long term use that really isn't scientifically justified and all study actually suggest that. the long term effects may not just be the absence of benefit but actually a very very because we want to. know their newsletter post the usual. method you have australian version they. were. used to dump it on to the new.

study did you go to the polluted introduces that you. insist was but you still need . to decouple image data you need to go to church for those new look these are well going to appear pretty chilled because there will be a choice to be on your borders will show you such to be able to search on the postal order over out of this thread who flew with don't usually do coke with full and can churn you. point of their beautiful and hear them. do you mean moon comes. well in the. past and janet just. stuck. to just what those libby speeches could you will know when you are going you

must use a little piece. amid fireworks and scaled down celebrations people see out 2020 and welcome the new year with hopes of a brighter 12 months ahead. also this hour world politicians consider introducing coded companies develop mobile apps to enforce science but there are warnings of significant complications. friend sees an alarming wave of suicides among small business owners as firms are pushed under by coronavirus law to. was my neighbor who lived right in front of my house had a restaurant for 2 generations during the 2nd lockdown everyone had to close again but so.