she can please the

more the heavenly father. thank you for the way that you have blessed and guided us. thank

you for our family. this occasion b. last specialism is unique. we pray in jesus' name a man looking back sometimes. i mean, this is a difficult memory for all of us to unpack and try to address it. sometimes it helps, but one of the things was what were we initially concerned about in those early days? i still wanted taylor to be a happy little boy, and i don't know if how will you be able to handle it? i didn't want the memory to heart to your life. obviously, the huge concern about worth asian, you know, he was so land hole in. so what is he going to have to go through who i was young and i didn't understand what was what was going on at the time. and it was difficult for me to process. and i look back as like,

i guess it wasn't the greatest thing to show everybody from, from me, i guess a member in distant from people who and his, i was just the way of knowing. i've been dealing with it. but you know, through family and everything, it's all about us closer then i appreciate that you all done for me is changing my perspective on life. and i know that that i think about daily's how when you expect me to me an example. now what do you want me to live?

the are the kind of big brother warranty as well, and we probably all needed to say they stay probably needed to be able to express this because to a great extent we have suppressed our failings in order to be protective in order to hope all of this would turn out well,

the nice strong the me o me ah. so talking

to 3, it felt very warm from october. for sure. i don't know why she the tree branches away. i felt peace for the 1st time. and once i got a telephone call from a detective about 2 in the afternoon, she was in intensive care. and if they hadn't told me it was kristen, i don't think i would have known that it was. she was just virtually unrecognizable . it was the next morning when we went to her apartment and i went out onto the balcony and there were a bandages bloody bandages needles.

but the most dramatic thing i remember, and i still have a very hard time with this. there was actually still a piece of her jaw that was on the on floor of the apartment, the floor or the balcony. and i don't think i even told tristan this before. but that is probably what brought the whole thing most dramatically home to me. the look at that knocking me now. i remember the ceiling, the real real thought about what it must have been like from my friends. i have to clean up

the pieces of teeth. i'm phones and so much was the i can't imagine what hard for them to has to face that it's so weird and to go back into that mindset to see that balcony and think about what was going through my head as i sat there. i

i when i come in and make me briefly that i can leave. i went to my the i was on the last shot i see more stuff for example, how to pull him. i 1st screaming on the ground is where i miss lee. so i look around the pole corner,

i see 3 missed in like all 3 of them are going out slowly and then soon as i turned around twice when our friends in contact with allow terry fall in the ground, a kind of splint picking up the funding in a walk over there for them, and then a fit for him to run them back. miss direction. father turned around as well. i feel like the

1st i feel over the reason being is because i always justify myself. someone does something to me or try to take my life then it was of everything i dental and then realize how many it will impact once again his lab number is in all the things that you have done as recorded. i did the william and

i, i use one of the worst ever mass shootings in america was in las vegas in 2017. the tragedy a close a little live in real life vegas. where many say elected officials are controlled by christina learners. the vegas shooting revealed what the l v n p d really is. and now it's part of the spin machine. most of the american public barely remembers that it happened just shows you the power of money and las vegas.

the powerful showed that true colors when the pen demick heard the most contagious contagion that we've seen in decades. and then you have a mayor who doesn't care. so here's caroline goodman, offering the lives of the vegas residence. to be the control group to the shiny facades conceal a deep indifference to the people. why is going to be saved if they were to take an action? absolutely, keep the registering and keep the slot machines doing. this is a money machine is a huge cash register that is ran by people who don't care about people's lives being lost, guys come to your house and they do what happened to appear. he gave whatever measures. yeah, you protect yourself and it was around you. the prosecutor

tried to do everything you could define charges to push. yes, we have it because you guys were in my house and i didn't know if there armed or not. it was dark. windows were closed. i saw him standing there. i told him to stop. they wouldn't stop, they kept, i don't know where they are doing. and i said, okay, i mean in my mind, does it say the whole thing last about 20 or 30 seconds? and then it got ugly. it took over half an hour before the police showed up and stage is not going to come in and do anything until was seen secure in the scene was secure because it took the guy 40 minutes to die as

a long time cause again assembly. he kept reach and i need to his belt, he wouldn't, he wouldn't roll over and kept reaching in his path. i didn't know where to reach for. could have been a guy and i was reaching for derrick, meaning he crawled towards the name of collapse and i don't know what his intentions were. he wouldn't, he wouldn't say a word. so you know, i was still a certified medical person. sad time. if i felt the scene was safe, i don't know what i could again, but i would have done something, you know, trying to help the guy. but i was a long as 3040 minutes in my life. i knew that i was going to be on. i've seen enough death in my life like career i you there's, there's nothing new to this guy. i

wish i could put it behind me and move on like, never happen. i know i never will. i don't think anybody ever could. the key every over it. i doubt it, i'd like to find somebody to ask me

i felt i had become a burden to everyone. i know i had a gun in my room and pace, someone broke and i am going to do know what i'm going to and everything was tame and things have just gotten out of control. i. c c know. c you're way i walk out to me,

sit here for me think of our home me gone. c the whole i me ah,

pull the trigger and pain away. i can't see my in my room the screen. and then 3 weeks later i will go from a coma and i will create for that. i survives i remind myself,

every day i am alive. i'm alive. her i i i, i me, i'm doing my normal routine into the bathroom. i get a shower, brush my teeth and get my hair done. i want matthew as he was in the

bathroom as well as upon the counter. i'm not sure why is up on the counter. was me per santo op to my mom's room. i seen the gun lying there on the underneath the left side of the med and i and i walked back into the bathroom with a gun in my hands. out of curiosity, just looking at it and trying to figure out what it does and how to work it and i so we proceed to to safety. ah. and then from there on, i talk the gun back putting around and then chamber. and i just remember matthew says to me, you know, that was

a gift from papa to mon or safety. and i didn't answer. i just hear a gunshot, i and so at 8 o'clock that same night, december, 1st, one by one. we say goodbye and the last one so like how it

cleaned over for my forehead against his little buddy who are going to do great things. i love you. i'll see in the morning and a lot in a lot of ways it feels like the morning has never come

in . ah i

oh i ah

in. ah, i ah phoenix does actually got an uncommon face, men's clothing and shoulder holster. it's a kind of s can feminism. its name is how camino i bought it up, put a human, someone with the whole mother that it was. it was a lot of up on the job, but you don't want me. she lives in one of the most dangerous and patriarchal

provinces of afghanistan, cost lacey which time i thought, sure, no, i shall do but i haven't. i set up a new kid. i'm glad you got me knows that she does her best to fight for women's rights. i am not able to get that done. as you know what i do, i know that she's known him by her nickname, the king. who was i got a reco much other that was really good. ah, the farm to near will use against

by doing the same tactics that republicans i had to see coming from democrats after consider it. so they would accuse biting of being too soft, indecisive, of like an, a clear agenda not off enough with who to definitely they will try to sabotage some of the agreements that have been reached . geneva ah, the socio gotcha. felicia louis. good to can just he better than me and russell, but i hope so. but over the, over the years we sort of the

promotion learning and the senior course procure, mrs to actually this is for orfa. gotcha. i good position. the good we think he might be a soldier because off the boot, she's wearing huge, which fold up. took all the stuff. when you wasn't young on this, you're still in the priest, please. ah, the next financial survival guide. daisy, let's learn about fill out. let's say i'm a joy and your great grief on thanks of the fight was 3 prod. thank you for helping

with joy. that's right, fail waivery. the headlines this saturday here on our team as americans celebrate the end of slavery in the united states. the supreme court blocks a lawsuit against chocolate giants using child labor on african fond indigenous people in canada are granted the right to use that traditional names and official documents that one rights activists tell us is not enough to make up for decades of cultural genocide. because the government both own my was the government, me the decision to take the kids to take our languages to take our cultures to take me.