i use a pretty girl. i was very happy outgoing, very physically fit successful person. i had a lot of friends. ours were those people that just look at it and think, well they had the ultimate life. one of the hardest things that i had the face was not having a face the

2 years that i couldn't talk or drink were the most difficult. all i could do was grunt trying to and just to have him one i i get busy very easily. i run into things scene at night is difficult. who is ago? my stitches guy in factors and my face actually exploded when my 6th child replacement failed. that was the low point. the i had a son next to and i was for myself and sure. several times

a day with a syringe i drew incessantly because i couldn't shut my mouth. my surgical in point is when my face is as soon as the recall as possible. and the scars have been released so that i can move and eat and talk without pain. and basically when the surgeon said or may this is as good as it gets. then on. know i'm done. the

prison. i don't get it all created here in a barbara, so i was a new okay. well i can do the things i was able to do that really thought of my journey. everybody comes in the bumps out of what i was facing. problems with therapy. i mean, we can really therapist and most of the young people know the law. they're ignored, neither not being met. so therefore they don't know how to live with easy for them

to give up one life. like me, i had a little by placing the life i accepted that i accept the fact that i made that appointment when a personal feel via they do things and they might have more the

res country boy i was in diapers time i felt my feet. i'd take me like before i can back and rifle which is why i was like, always out like not where i'm looking for the position open quillen turkey and it was oil i was

but as far as taking someone's life i thought it be a lot worse the in the me ah me friday morning. we had a cold. 0750 a little there was a shooting linwood road. oh,

i was a 1st officer almost like in the home i went on into the bathroom in the hallway. i when i got there. so the mother holding her son left me and most of them were covered in blood screaming oh my baby baby, it's my fault, my fault, the little boy, there's a brother taylor. i believe he was sitting in the hall outside the doorway. he was kind of in a bow, certain position, his knees up and his arms around his knees. and the state of shock

me appointed me. there was a whole lot. so he he was in raleigh but a lot. so you know, asked for a little gun just for protection for me, of the boy in and so i had it. and i guess this morning i just forgot me in panic. me that comes through in the midst of a situation like that is, is unlike anything else and you recognize even without knowing anything of what is

happening, you know, simply from the time a voice. this is not a good phone call me. i didn't believe that from the injuries that that they would ship on. good people have bad things happen to him on what time. and i think that was the case mom got distracted and didn't secure the weapon. and little boy found that thought it was a toy. pull the trigger and shot his brother i

i've had 4 or 5 surgeries to date. i don't remember the 1st 18 because a half and when i was in this, in my cobra, the servers i've had have a factors. every single heart of my buy there was a bond graph from my lower right leg, my hip shaved down twice. a phone graph from my effort left a riv. taken part of my staff fila. 2 thirds of my right brass was used to rebuild the skin on my face. and a skin graft was taken from my wrist. so every single bit of re hudson harvison to fix me face

every day as a struggle physically in chronic pain and tougher. i could say good, i survive something on survival. so going to another surgery before you know, but we'll always

be polite, never engage with an aggravated or confrontational office. don't get into any conversation to start answering questions. just ask for an attorney to survive in interrogation. you've gotta be ready. you're definitely don't want to be going to throw in a jump. so one cups, you're more likely to walk free. if you're rich and guilty when you are, if you're poor and you got 2 eyes and 2 ears and one mouth. so you should be seen in here and a whole lot more than you're saying if you don't take that advice, usually going to date yourself before

the lose lose. ah, i so what we've got to do is identify the threats that we have. it's crazy foundation. let it be an arms race is often very dramatic. development only personally, i'm going to resist. i don't see how that strategy will be successful, a very critical time. time to sit down and talk

me the news the getting me rather good. so last one question. how many you guys want to change your life? ok. so hopefully in this presentation i will be able to give you some insight on how to do that, how to navigate your way. i broke my hair south of you ah, growing up in the street in the road they learned like a lot of young kids. so the thing,

oh, oh no, no the when became what the street we are you enjoying your kilo got to a lot of the cases my go guys is acceptable to us. we had plenty of and you know, the good to kind of makes you not afraid anything anymore. mm. expectations of living was very, very so it because i knew i was borrowing on the control. i only had a way out in the cases at the skating cross threat and i'll kill somebody now young man, 18 years old thing is i was guilty of their degree murder.

and i said to myself, baldwin, transform us, i have my, my little problem or issue i get into valley. i had to take my metallic, he has a, my anger react and respond to sort of thing. i mean, so you guys all raise your hands or you want to change your life around. so guy with 3 guess 1st get to give a life the 2nd get in to give a reason. and the 3rd one is pretty well exactly for will and the power choice resulting because the choice thing the me ah ah ah,

it was wanting to renew over turkey. and just so happened i had my shot getting a truck. we immediately noticed, as you are out for the gate. ah, we're on a corner and i saw that sliding glass door open. i knew that i came right your answer here. and you can see me with a door open, his current darkened, and he caused shades and you're close at no. or you can't see what's in there. i saw 2 figures standing right there that door and they had a lot of my guns piled up on this table right here. that just came in the door. and i stood right here. and i yelled as i'm to stop 3 times. and they were right here,

and as soon as they pop that door open and i realized i didn't recognize me. and they were panicking, trying to get out and they wouldn't stop. i'd almost 3 times. they wouldn't do it. and so i fired one shot right from here. a fell right garrander grass. and he would not quit moving and i chase the other guy out there. he jumping the vehicle. he's pulled off and i popped round off right about here in the car sitting right dairy, so darn close it. like i said, the power i was too close for his good fortune. so he took off from the car and i used to hear scream or this guy alice and i both did. i went to his neighbor and, and she still over him and that's when he was aggressive towards her and

she fire a warning shot near course. i was up the street, but he said he shot somebody. the guy was not dead. he was hurt for certain, he was out of it. he was not is incapable of doing a life, but he is pretty much groaning. but he dive ever understanding fare for a tech when take 40 minutes. 30 minutes for the cops got her pretty brutal watching the guide i a thing about kevin didn't is pretty brutal is pretty tough to do. pretty tough to live with. you know, i know he cried for 2 days, you know, after what happened when, as soon as he started thinking about it, you know, i mean what he'd done but, but then he would to come to a realization i think that he just knew what he did he had to do, but it was,

it was tough on him really was, you know, i mean, i still don't think that he's really quite come over here. you know, it's always been a couple years now. ah. ah, ah, ah. the process that guilt, the grief mainly the guilt that i have from that day. like what i haven't gotten the biggest thing like i how stupid could i have been you know, what was, what was i thinking what just the constant thing like why did this happen?

and dealing with that, i don't think it's honestly ever something i've ever deal dealt with. dealt with just and i've been there, i've come to turn good. you're out, family and things. my parents said like reassuring me. i remember exact things, you know, as a kid, you just believe what you're saying is what you're doing me . i don't really know how i've dealt with it. honestly. just forgotten about it. mailing me

today. ah ah, i have it. welcome into his house this morning. integrate the thing is phrase this morning and dedicate ourselves to him. you know, there is certain times in our lives that we encounter circumstances that we would never had planned about 10 years ago. december was one of those events in our lives from for me. and taylor, and when my younger son, matthew died, and he was 5 years old at the time. and he was a very surprised when a tragedy like this happened. i think one of the automatic responses is whose fault

is it? for me, i did not 1st externalize that i 1st internalize that if i had only he died as a result of a gunshot. for taylor not, i don't really think of the in the sense of blame for him. and i never really have to be on stress. i think it was actually the next night or 2 family was together and we were just kind of waiting for this conversation. it was initiated by darren and beth, as they were trying to say some things to us. there needs to be a, a statement. people need to express how they feel. there needs to be an unburdening of how you feel. and so in that process of things, and i said, there will be no blame in this house. there will be no fixing

a blame we will all love you and we will all accept we're okay, is we are together in this in the guilt of it. i just would, if i would have done things differently, they may not be where we are today because of it. but that's why he had that hock. because i was still even the guilt. and it made me feel ha, better that i realize i me that it wasn't a good i guess. always drink it is with them happening like a family then lose a child. so in a board just wasn't my platen i

think probably the best response that we can have in a situation like that is to say it's not a guilt placed, but it's a guilt shared. just like it's a grief shared because of that amount of guilt for being responsible for a life in this setting. it's really it's not only too much for one person to bear. i think it's something that's meant to be borne together. i'm sure you're in here. yeah, i just, i wrote, i think i know where it is right here. black to read that he was writing this. i know since i was 11 years old when that and 7th

grade and hidden off in the way he was visiting me after my surgeries. and i said that i have a religious favour task. can i stay with you through the rest my surgeries and afterward fire recover? i said, i love you. of course you can stay with me. and that's my friendship. you can okay. i know. i get to see you. we're going to get right down to business. so i want to just examine you now, and then we'll take a look at the x ray together. and then we'll kind of tell you what we're planning for thursday. now what i'm doing, this is piano hard. the bone is, and i'm impressed. it is very hard. it's like normal bone. ok. ok. now you see how

your lip is scarred down a little bit. yeah. that's the other thing we're going to accomplish. been released the scars huh. and creative vestibule in the mouth. okay. which is like this base between your chicken go. we need to create them. ok. for lack of a better term. this is tooth ready, surgery. that's the one of the worst ever mess. shootings in america was in las vegas in 2017. the tragedy a close a little of the real last vegas, where many say elected officials are controlled by christina learners. the vegas shooting revealed what the l v m p d really is. and now it's part of the spin machine to the american public barely remembers that happened. that just shows you the power of money and las vegas. the

powerful showed that true colors when the pandemic had the most contagious contagion that we've seen in decades. and then you have a mayor who doesn't care. here's caroline goodman, offering the lives of the vegas residence. to be the control group, to the shiny facade, conceal of deep indifference to the people, the vice. gonna say that they have to take an action. absolutely, keep the registering and keep the slot machines doing. this is a money machine is a huge cash register that is ran by people who don't care about people's lives being lost. ah, the ah

miss 32. police 3 for good. can each other than the min russell, but i hope so. but over the over the, the little motion learning studies the in the course procure mrs. mr. bob rhodes. i should been good. we think he might be a soldier. if he's off the brute,

she's wearing huge, switched up, took a personal stuff. when you was little young on this, you're still summarizing, please. ah ah nice. we still story. see, 1st to us russia. so much of the by the presidency in geneva sees that they meant to to joe biden, agree to return the respective ambassadors to the post today. and also as caution about the post summit. by last time, i have no illusions following the meeting, neither old nor new. they can't be any illusions at all. moscow said grim record of the daily number of covert 19 cases, souls to an all time high. the cities matter is enough. the raft of new measures.