yeah, who's into ski became short and irritable and he wasn't positive anymore. everything was negative. i was totally dysfunctional and began experiencing this well call this irrational terror like level of zion. he that i had never previously experienced might come home from work and i found him on the kitchen floor, crawl up in a ball just sobbing and rocking. didn't want anybody to touch him, be anywhere near him. he go, you find a place to go hide in the house and just saw and controlled lee. it's really, really hard to see. i got to a point where i refer wholesale, refused to consume a more drugs. and that kind of can do ahead several months ago. and that's why right now we're separated. the breaking point for me to signing to move out there was, there was

a couple of things. he is of the mindset that it's just going to take time. and there's nothing that you can do, he said, you know, here's what the options that i see. they're mostly in medical based and he's absolutely refused. explain my entire background. my psychiatrist says i look, i took pride in being in the navy. i took pride and surviving and making it through my tea and had high hopes to do good things for the navy, for the country and, and now i don't know who i am. and the only thing that's happened between then and now is i've been exposed to a series of very strong psychiatric medications. any answer after 20 minutes was will, i can give you a prescription for some bolter. when i did move out, he called me and said that he was standing in the basement next to a new and i said in what's your safety plan? and he said to call you and i said after the safety plan,

you need to hang up and call 911 and hate having to tell him that it feels callous to me when you're going through withdrawal psychiatric drugs, the best thing is to kinda get back off that ledge and just say dave, just give you, give yourself more time, give yourself more time, continue to fight for it. you know, and some day we'll regain a sense of normalcy in your daily life. typically we find that the withdrawal phenomenon is the opposite of whatever the drug does. if the intention of the drug is to help somebody be more relaxed or help them fall asleep than when they're experiencing withdraw, what they will, experiences, anxiety and restlessness and insomnia. in a even get so bad,

but they are profoundly depressed and consider suicide. the withdrawal symptoms can often be much worse than the original problems the person came with. and the withdrawal is very, very difficult. sometimes, quite dangerous, may take months or years to really be accomplished. people are jumping out of their skin feeling terrific. exciting. having all sorts of physiological symptoms that difficult to bear. people cannot stop this medicine except in the slowest possible way with very gradual reductions in dose. me. so this how i cut my pills. i'm doing here a 10 percent tape or. ready take the pill and weigh it so whole. ringback pill had 2 milligram ways 0.15.

ready 910 percent of that. you don't want to take off too much because even don't waste the pills almost there actually. that's 10 percent. yeah. the 1st time i tapered, i didn't have my scale as yet. so i was just eyeball and because i was determined to get off, your body will tell you if you're handling the cuts based on symptoms. so it took me awhile to get from 2 to 1.1.64, that's all i could go to this group has almost 2300 members. people just post stuff. how is everyone doing today? let's see. i'm in a strange window to day dos for almost 2 days, up doses when you are at a certain dose and the symptoms get really bad. so you go back to the original dose where you weren't feeling so bad. everyone has a unique stuff running through,

you know, to persons are like, i had brain that i had tremors. i had severe a night sweats. i have a symptom where it feels like things are crawling inside my body. just just moved in and i came across this image and i was like, wow, that's exactly how that's exactly how it is. nobody understands this. and if you don't have support, you will lose yourself. i've been a part of these groups since august of last year. and since august of last year we lost 3 people to suicide. in my support groups. 3, we lost 50 something. you're a woman, who's dr. colt target her office quite a bit. and she's suffered. she has 2 little boys. and she walked in front of a train because she couldn't deal with it anymore. about a month ago, we lost a 40 something year old guy. he shot himself in the head. louis

blew his head off. so we're losing people in this fight. i think about it all the time. what if my symptoms get to the point where i can't make it? what am i going to do? let's go back to the start of this disease model in the 1980 s. okay? now the 1st drug that was tested in this new era was santa press lamb for panic disorder. and here was the study they conducted. they compared xanax versus a placebo group. and the primary outcome measure was the number of panic attacks on average per week. and after 4 weeks, sonics was doing better, fewer panic attacks. and 8 weeks the xanax patients were doing no better than placebo. and then at the end of 14 weeks, the xanax patients were doing worse than they were at the beginning. and much, much worse than the placebo patients the trial told of harm done. they told the

people who are going to get addicted when they came off, they'd have so all sorts of withdrawal symptoms and some people unable to get off. ok, that's what the study showed. what did they report? they didn't report the 8 week results. they focused on the 4 week results. because that was the story that told of an effective new treatment for panic disorder and completely hid the 14 week results. pretty soon exaninth became one of the best selling drugs in the country. it is still prescribed left and right. and what did we have in the early eighty's? a story of science, the tone of harm done, the longer you take a study out, the more likely you are to see people not doing well on that drug, great or developing side effects from that drug. so the pharmaceutical industry doesn't favor long term studies for monetary reasons and for outcome reasons. they don't want to show that their drug actually doesn't do well. the guerrilla in the room is the pharmaceutical industry. the drug companies spend something like

$80000000000.00 a year. and marketing and lobbying, they spend much, much less on research. and most of the research they do is really a tool of marketing. there's as much marketing in the tests that are devised to measure the outcomes in the investigators that are higher to conduct the study. all of that stuff is marketing, but it's presented in manufactured and published science. so here's how it's done and how it was done. the pharmaceutical companies funnel all sorts of money. what are called thought, we years academic psychiatrist at prestigious american universities, harvard, stanford, johns hopkins. and those academic psychiatrist began working for the drug companies as consultant serving as their speakers, advisors, et cetera. you would start with a clinical study of the drug, but who's designing the study, the pharmaceutical companies? they know how to design it to make their drug, the good that step one, who then analyzes the data. well, their own people do,

it gets done by the drug companies themselves. 3rd, and who writes the papers. it's actually ghost writers hired by the drug companies to write up the study. they've now present this study to the people that they want to be the big names under study. and then those thought leaders basically sign off on the ghost written papers and they become, quote, the authors of the published paper, the former editors of the medical journals like jama and new england journal of medicine. and b, m. j, british medical journal. they've all said that like basically we became vehicles for story laundry. it was a corrupted creation of an evidence base. now i'm a practicing doctor in some town. what am i going to believe? i'm going to believe, you know, mr. dr. big, we get harvard university, that this is the best science. so my obligation is to use the very drug they say is so great. so for example,

process project and really work in the trials process can all sorts of adverse effects. and those of us who are old enough to remember when pros that came to market it was, the drug itself was on the cover of magazines. our powers are such now that we can give you whatever personality you want, that's how great our knowledge is advancing. that was the story told. what did science tell us? you know what they found in the 1970s. for the 1st studies done in germany, what did they see? all sorts of psychotic events, worsening of depression, homicidal, suicidal impulses. so much that the german authority said this is a dangerous drug. we're not going to approve it. and now go read the studies that were reported by the americans. the psychosis is gone to homicide problems are gone . imagine your mother and i know mothers who said to their kid who got depressed over breaking up with a girl or something like that. the doctor says, oh, process doesn't increase suicide risk. and then a week later that kid hangs himself. that's an real case. can you think of any

worse corruption, of that? it has been shown that half of the deaths that occur in psychiatric drug trials then ever published, they disappear. you have an expression in america, torture your data until they confess. and this happens all the time. the difference between an honest data analysis and one you have manipulated can be worth billions on the work market. so what do you think they'll do the way me aware of

the range grab morgan know still nowhere near the person that was but this is explain it to my wife like i know i love her. i know i can remember i can recall the feelings miss sensations when we met and we dated, we got married but i don't feel, i don't feel love for her. i don't feel love for my dog and don't feel love or connection. i mean, it's almost like i don't feel for other people's concerns or feelings or emotions. i think that's multifaceted. i think it's partly the drugs, i think it's partly brought on by the severe trauma going through the experience. ah, me ah

ah, i think what you're binding deed up against them with a great, over the last 30 years, it was the 1st decision which didn't follow the course of the events and history. what was an attempt to change the course? and the biggest task on the paper is to contradict history, is to change the historical part from the national 4 important what actually drill . why didn't do the the is that about the mark. sounds good. i took my punch in. you got to get some more. yeah,

worried it shows me what to do. john? i got on the how did i put it on the top limit and i wanted them off? you're gonna be skill like that to do the work for me when i get up there for us, let me know i don't. but if family hasn't necessarily understood why chosen to come back and stay and interviews that relationship, why do they find it isn't useful, hurtful things?

yes. and when you were in the absolute depths of it, you were abusive. and what way? burly. this is. yeah. okay. not physically, physically know, by verbally abusive, i can recall telling you just gotta give me time. so mad at you. why recently? well, because we're giving it time and it wasn't getting really any better. and i didn't feel like necessarily working. i mean, you said some pretty horrible things that happened so quickly after we got married . i felt like it was like a bait and switch kind of deal. so anything that you're trying to get off and 5 in the summer, i would like to try. yeah, i think it's gonna be hard. i say what i'm scared about is that i haven't heard,

i'm here to support you through this regardless of what happens. and that's 33. i am ok. i doesn't feel that again. i have been through hell with you and have held you well, you've been your head against the wall and this is my fear coming from the things that were said when you were in your depths and that say you're going to say, well, maybe this isn't the right, relationship for us. now. can i put so much into it too? i

really is no research on the long term impact of stimuli use, but the longer you're on them, the higher the dose. so the more risks that you incur over time and the less actual benefit you get from that drug. hello. hi. how are you? good, good. so how's your focus been doing? not as hot as i would like it. it kind of feel like i've reached the tolerance co long overall hasn't been that you've been in tow 15 years. you're dosages of science i've ever seen for myself, but if it's just not grade, then normally we would try out are all okay and i'm actually interested in decreasing and getting off the road. yeah. i mean, you always can. if i were you myself, i wouldn't just abruptly stopped. oh no, i'm not. starting up there, i was not. right. if you could actually open the capsule and gradually,

day after day, just take out a little bit more. what, at what rate, you could kinda judge, you could maybe drop the 3rd of the amount out, want to wait for a few days to take the 3rd out of the other one, you know, just kinda when off the other hand you said definitely it's better to be on a medicine and still not grade then i would recommend trying out around just because it's got a little bit higher potency. yeah, yeah. well, thank you. i appreciate it. oh yeah, sure thing else. i think i'm sure. thank you very much. you're welcome. the real quick while we're going to see the doctor, they see that doctor that put me on these drugs. there's a hidden camera right here and i got some wires underneath all this. well, there was the office right there. he's following the script. he said i went to

medical school and i'm a board certified psychiatrist, and i follow everything that they said to diagnose people. so basically he doesn't believe that he's doing anything wrong. i we go into this field because we want to help people, but it's very difficult to know where to turn for on biased evidence on these issues. the pharmaceutical industry has tremendous influence over what doctors learn how they learn it. so general, lack of knowledge about the dangers of these drugs is one of the main reasons that doctors continue to prescribe even when they're inadvertently causing their patients arm. you know, right before she went to motivation,

she was just fine. she was a little little depressed, but she was not having psychotic episode. she was not having body texts. she was not hallucinating. do you think that the medication is actually the cause of this? it was as if i was asking the most relevant question the world i never got a really response. it was, it was just not worthy of their attention. the more that we were talking about this is who rebecca is. we know our daughter, we know this medication is turned into someone else. we said we don't think she should be on medication and here's why. and we read off the list of symptoms. you basically said, you know, i think this is a really, this is a huge mistake. it was a reminder of the year in which by enlarge whenever we went down this path of his medication, harmful, we got no support from the psychiatrist that we saw. none of it's not medication then you're not doing it right. but we start our guns and the sounds very dramatic

. i feel that decision saved our daughter's life. i kept thinking when she was 1st telling us that she was telling the press that i wouldn't even have have the vocabulary to say that when i was her age. so that just tells you a little bit about how pervasive this is become in our society. i see children who are acting out or feeling distressed. they are like the canaries and the cool mind you know about are basically shouting out like, there is something wrong. but you know, we quite of them i got out of the hospital, it took me off medication. within a few months i was, i was back to normal, not normal, but i was, my hallucinations are completely gone. and what was left was the issues to begin with being diety and the eating disorder. and then we can move to focus on those

because those are the problems. me. something that i never thought that i would do during that year and even afterwards it's like, there's no way i can go to college. i can't handle that, but here i am handling it and the pair i 1st on who school as much as i do. so i'm just kind of being a normal college and having fun because that's what i can actually do. now the so why did you do this for me? i was just as concern and as you were about coming off the drugs and i wanted to make sure that you were in charge, right. you did what you felt was best, but you also had the tools laid out for you. the best way is essentially an exponential taper. and that's what we plotted out here. and what that leads to is this nice slow decline over an extended period of time. do you

think it was of any value? well yeah, cuz when i did it myself, i went down too quickly and i felt horrible. and this gave me a clear plan with specific dates and members. it was very helpful. math can be love . i see glimmers of the old days and much more often than i have been several years. it's not. he's not there all the time, but i i want to come home now, whereas before it was okay. you know, take cover, the brass then come home. but now i want to come home, which is a good feeling that's nice to feel that again i

. ready got killed an action a month to the day after i was out. so now i'm processing this brief, 13 years later, which most people would say should be over. and right now, you know, i just had to call me at one of my soldiers and be like, can you tell me the story again? because last time i heard it, i was on drugs and i didn't feel it. so i need to sit by him and think like liquid just wanted us and feel it. ah ah ah

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[000:00:00;00] the the who's the only one main thing is important for not as an internationally speaking that is a nation's not allowed to do anything, all the master races,

and then you have the minor nation. so the slave, the american, is brock obama and others have had a concept of american exceptionalism. international law exist as long as it serves the american interest. if it doesn't, it doesn't exist. like turning this russian, enter this dangerous bullying man that wants to take over the world. that was a culture strategy. so i'm going to noon, i english v i b, i not leashed to him. one, tablet, block, nato to it's our we move east. the reason us head gemini is dangerous. is it the, the sovereignty of other countries? the exceptionalism that america uses and it's international. war planning is one of the greatest threats to the populations of different nations. if nato, what is founded shareholders in the united states and elsewhere in large companies

would lose millions and millions or is business and business is good. and that is the reality of what we're facing, which is fashion. the the taliban celebrates, taking full control of got his son off declaring being defeated the last remaining armed resistance. however, on to town, about 5 and so thing to hold counsel the eastern township called a convicted rapist and several suspected terrorists discovered among asylum seekers. alec to germany from