i said, a horse, you know, a knowhorse. he says, there are palomino, a clydesdales, more. what do you want? i am going, all right, a picture mr. ed. who would he choose for a bride? get me that horse. i go home, sleep, shower, go back to the studio. there is a horse there. for the 7:30 p.m. audience, i wrote a piece. bill murray is the weekend that big guy. gilda is going to play the voice. in dress rehearsal, the horse was coming back. it was the widow, so we put a black veil and little hat on the horse. the horse was let in. bill said, did he suffer much.

no-oo-oo, he went quietly-y-y. something happened with this horse between the time of dress rehearsal and when he saw the red light in knew he was on television. because -- did he suffer much? the horse to started going in circles. flipped out. we had no script. gilda going, oooh, so upset. the horses leaves the studio, goes down a corridor at nbc. lorne says to the cameramen, follow that horse. gilda says, i am is so upset, i am going to throw myself out a window. it was all good.

you make adjustments and move forward. whew. [laughter] [applause] >> who knew 37 years later you would be in this situation. >> it was all building to this moment. >> a nice segue. >> i had to bring it back. >> given that, well -- will there be a "lunatics 2"? >> absolutely not. yes, i do not even care if we have a book. it is like going on tour with alan zweibel. very entertaining. like watching him try to find the gate at the airport. >> you make it seem like i am the rain man. >> he would be able to find the gates at the airport. [laughter]

you see the parents with the thing that connects their wrists to the children. that is what i need with him. >> alan on book tour, you have to go to many different cities and make connections. you pack a small carry-on suitcase. when we met for the book tour in new york, alan had a suitcase that had wheels. it would not go in the overhead. the question was, with the plane take off? he had a garment bag. i said, what did you bring? he said that he brought, -- >> amongst other things, i brought two bathing suits. >> he brought two bathing suits. a book tour. you get a schedule. you go on all these interviews.

you'll do this, whatever. what is never said it is 3:00 p.m. to 6:00 p.m., swimming. [laughter] >> i brought a black one and a blue one, depending on what color socks i was going to be wearing to the swimming pool that day. [laughter] >> well, they put you in a nice hotel. there could be a swimming pool. >> i thought it was practical. >> it was very entertaining. i hope we write another book. if for no other reason, to see what he brings. >> we will pick two other characters and a situation. >> we have a title. "the brothers karamozov." what do you think? they like it. >> and do you miss the newspaper world at all? what was that experience like

for you then? >> i do not really miss it. i did like it. i did it for like 25 years, writing a weekly column. at some point i thought, i know i have done this for a long time. i would rather stop doing it before people say, oh, you're still doing it? i occasionally write for the newspaper. i go to the conventions. i go to the olympics. i happen more have -- i have been having more fun at writing a books. >> how much fun was the writing this book? >> this was the most fun i ever had writing a book. it did not feel like work at all. i was e mailing jokes to alan to make him laugh. that is really what it felt like. he was still sending the chapters. i do not think he realizes that

the book is actually out. [laughter] neda i am rain man. >> it is incredibly fun to read. it is so funny. you have answered some of this. since you're surprising each other with the chapters. i guess we're going to cuba -- i will show you. was there in the editing when it was done? or did you go with what you had? >> occasionally, and i will not name names -- [laughter] 1 of us would apparently not have really read the other ones chapter. >> you know, i have a lot of stuff. i have three kids. i have stuck in my life. >> i would send a couple questions. in the previous chapter, they were in cuba and they were both male. [laughter] and one other point, i do not know technically what this would

be called. but we were maybe a quarter of a way into the book, and alan killed all the main characters. [laughter] >> that could be a problem. >> i said, maybe you want to rethink that. >> i do not think they would die from that hike, ok? break a leg, you know. >> things like that, continuity issues, i guess. i do not remember the question. >> i do not either. i think we're getting close to the time where we're going to take questions from anyone who wants to get up and ask them. line up at the microphone. in the meantime, i was wondering -- actually, someone in the audience was wondering. alan -- >> yes?

>> what don't we know about billy crystal and/or larry david that you want to share with the international radio audience? which can probably be picked up in l.a. billy is like my closest friend. he and larry are both my buddies. larry david, when we all started out, we used to sit back in the back of the improvisation or whatever club we were in it just to watch larry. he was the comedian's comedian. back then he had hair like larry from the three stooges. he had wire rim glasses. he would get on a stage on a friday night at the improv. the crowd was predominantly suburban predominantly wouldblue hair. a pure suburban crowd.

larry would get up. he will look at them and the first words out of his mouth -- you know, i feel very comfortable with you people. in fact, i feel so comfortable, i am thinking of using the true form of the verb instead of usted. i was laughing my ass off. it was so funny. the audience was like an oil tank. he had no idea what they were looking at. he kept on going. as said, i think a lot of people miss use the tu form of the verb. for example, when it they stabbed caesar. he said, et tu brutus?

is that policies are, i just step do, if there's any time for usted, it is now. tumbleweeds down the aisle. larry would say, the hell to all of you and he leaves. but we knew that someday, somehow -- no one would predict what would happen to him, but we knew he was a genius. >> what about billy? >> nicest guy in the world. what you see is what you get. when i wrote "700 sunday's" with them, i was honored to do it. direct for long island jewish family is not really a stretch. he has a real big heart. there are no secrets. i cannot tell you anything you do not know. he is a wonderful family man. married to his wife for 40 or 41 years. a couple of kids, about three

grandchildren. >> woody allen wrote jobs for local newspapers and comedians. you wrote for comex. does that still happen? >> that is a good question. >> leno, letterman -- they all have staffs. but if you're talking about starting up, most comics writer their own stuff. but they buddy up. that is what larry did with jerry. >> can you teach somebody to be funny, to write comedy? do you have it or do you not? what about being funny? >> no. [laughter] >> either you have it or you do

not. >> you do not. [laughter] >> no, i do not believe you can teach people to be funny. i think people can hone it and get better. but i do not think anybody who has no sense of humor is going to get one. do you? >> this is so exciting. the youngest member of our studio audience has submitted to the microphone. i have to say one thing. please keep your questions short and to the point. >> what point? comments. with that, the floor is yours. >> i have a quick statement before my question. it is not like there is a line. >> he is funny. you cannot teach that. >> actually, dave, i want to

thank you. when i was in high school, my cousin gave me one of your books, "dave barry talks back." i have not read anything like it before. i was on my couch laughing out loud. i went to college couple of years later and said i wanted to try this. i was at usc. i wrote a weekly humor column in a similar style to yours. i ended up writing 100 of these every week, every night. >> and you are homeless now. >> sincerely, it was one of the most rewarding experiences i had done, so thank you for that. >> is that the statement or the question? >> the statement. >> he is so much more a fan of mine and yours.

if anybody has any questions about deli, i am here for you. sliced meat? i am here for you. hitler, bin laden, and this kid. i hate him. >> you're right about that head comment. >> and you are standing pretty far away. [laughter] >> in transitioning from writing your short for humor to yearlong for narrative, what was the biggest challenge? >> being brave enough to try it. i was in my 40 pause before i even tried to write a novel. i said i did not know how to do it. if you read a lot, and you can figure out what you're supposed to do -- the hard part is -- the

difference is, in the novel, the long form, you need some sort of plot. when i wrote a humor column, i never a word about any structure. there was no point. it was pretty clear. you read them. >> thank you very much. >> you're welcome. >> now we have another question. >> i do not have a statement. >> actually, that was a statement. [laughter] >> my question to both of you is -- dave, your books have such a breath of topics. alan, saturday night live is such a huge thing in terms of the topics. where you get these ideas, where

do they come from? >> we have no useful skills. i am dead serious. we have talked about this. 3o was t thing, and the code got crinkled, i could not do anything. >> the mental energy the other people are using to make useful products in the world, things that people need, we have spent our entire lives trying to amuse ourselves. that is all we know how to do. so we are better at it than people who have real jobs the them i think that is absolutely right. if you want to feed your family, let's say, you have to discipline yourself. there is also a way of looking at the world. once again, my friend larry david, he would take a little

more salt and make a whole meal out of it. it is about looking at the world with a certain attitude. >> there are a lot of people who are funny and have a sense of humor, but they get sidetracked into productive work. we do not let that happen. [laughter] >> i am afraid we are out of time. as hard as it is to believe. [applause] >> thank you. >> i do not even think we can ask a final question because it would take us past our time. >> our thanks to dave barry and alan zweibel, authors of "blue knit 6." -- lunatic."

we also want to remind everyone here in the room that copies of the book are on sale in the lobby, and our guests will be here to autograph them. >> anyone have a pen? >> we appreciate your allowing them to make their way to the lobby as quickly as possible. this meeting of the commonwealth club of california is adjourned. [applause] >> you probably think you know

all about the exploratorium. but have you ever been after dark? did you know there was a monthly party called after dark? science mixes with culture and adults mix with other adults. no kids allowed. every week there is a different theme. to tell us about the themes is melissa alexander. tell us about some of the previous themes we have had. >> we have had sex ploration, sugar, red, blue. many things. >> what is the theme tonight? >> rock, paper, scissors. we are having a tournament tonight, but we have also used as a jumping off point to explore lots of different ideas. you can find out about rock,

paper, scissors as a game as a reproductive strategy. you can interact with a piece of art created by lucky dragon. you can get your hair cut from a cool place called the public barber's salon. they use scissors only. you can find out about local geology, too. >> that sounds like fun. let's check it out. >> this is the most common rock on the surface of the earth. interesting thing is, most of this rock is covered over by the ocean. >> error congested a cool presentation on plate tectonics. tell us about what we just saw. >> we wrapped up a section of a lesson on a plate tectonics, here at the exploratory and -- exploritorium.

>> are you excited to see people here having fun and learning about science? >> the people that come here are some selected to begin with, they actually enjoy science. i teach teachers to have fun with their kids. the general public is a great audience, too. they're interested in science. >> we have a blast every time. they have different names. >> they have a bar and a cafe. everything i need. we are excited for the speaker. >> it is nice to be in the exploratorium when there are not a lot of kids around. >> before tonight, i never knew there were major league rules to rock, paper, scissors. i am getting ready to enter into a competition. sarah's here to give me some tips. what do i need to do to win it? >> this is a game of chance, to

a degree. one of the best ways to bring it home is a degree of intimidation, maybe some eye contact, maybe some muscle. it is a no contact sport. sheer i contact is a good way to maybe intimidate to see if you can set them off, see if they throw something they did not mean to. >> i am going to see what happens. >> i got kicked out in the first round. [applause] >> given up for sunni. the rock, paper, scissors champion. >> what are you going to do now? >> i have been having so much fun. i got my tattoo. before we go, i want to thank melissa alexander for having us here tonight. how did you know san francisco needed a night like tonight?

>> thank you for coming. everybody loves the exploratorium. we are reluctant to push the kids out of the way in the day, so i knew we needed to create one evening a month just for the rest of us to have a good time, the adults. >> absolutely. where can we find out what is coming up after dark? >> that is easy, exploratorium .edu/afterdark. >> thank you. thanks for watching >> welcome to culture wire. we will look at the latest and greatest public art project. recently, the airport unveiled the new state of the art terminal. let's take a look.

the new terminal service and american airlines and virgin america was designed by a world- renowned architecture's firm. originally built in 1954, the building underwent massive renovation to become the first registered terminal and one of the must modern and sustainable terminals and the united states. the public art program continues its 30-year legacy of integrating art into the airport environment with the addition of five new commissions that are as bold and dynamic as the new building. >> this project was completed in record time, and we were able to integrate the artist's early

enough in the process that they could work with the architect said that the work that is completed is the work that really helps complement and instill the space as opposed to being tucked away in a corner. >> be experience begins with the glass facades that was designed with over 120 laminated glass panels. it captures the experience of being under or over clouds when flying in a plane. depending on the distance or point of view, it can appear clear for more abstract and atmospheric. the subtle colors change gradually depending on the light and the time of day. >> i wanted to create an art work that looks over time as well as working on in the first glance. the first time you come here, you may not see a.

but you may be able to see one side over the other. it features a couple of suspended sculptures. each was created out of a series of flat plains run parallel to each other and constructed of steel tubing. >> it is made up of these strata. as the light starts to shift, there is a real sense that there is a dynamism. >> it gives the illusion that this cultures might be fragments of a larger, mysterious mass. >> the environmental artwork livens it with color, light, and the movement. three large woven soldiers are suspended. these are activated by custom

air flow program. >> i channeled air flow into each of these forms that makes it move ever so slightly. and it is beating like a heart. if-0 when as of the forces of nature moving around us every second. >> shadow patterns reflect the shapes of the hanging sculptures. the new terminal also features a children's play areas. both of the market the exploratory n.y. -- exploratorium. the offer travelers of all ages a playful oasis. using high quality plywood, they created henches shaped like a

bird wings that double as musical instruments. serving as a backdrop is a mural featuring images of local birds and san francisco's famous skyline. >> in the line between that is so natural, you can see birds and be in complete wilderness. i really like that about this. you could maybe get a little snapshot of what they are expecting. >> it is an interactive, keck sculpture that is interacted with by the visitor. >> they are a lot about and they fall down the belt. it moves the belt up, and if you turn that faster, the butterflies fall in the move of words.

>> the art reflect the commission's commitment to acquiring the best work from the bay area and beyond. in addition to the five new commissions, 20 artworks that were already in the airport collection were reinstalled. some of which were historically cited in the terminal. it includes major sculptures by the international artists. as a collection, these art works tell the story of the vibrant arts scene in the early 1960's through the mid-1980s's. the illustrate san francisco's cultural center and a place of innovation that is recognized and the love throughout the world. one of the highlights is a series of three left tapestries. they are on view after being in storage for 20 years.