and now, abc's "jimmy kimmel live." >> dicky: from hollywood it's "jimmy kimmel live"! tonight -- shonda rhimes. dave salmoni and animals. celebrities read mean tweets live. and music from jill scott. with cleto and the cletones. and now, all of a sudden, here's jimmy kimmel!

>> jimmy: i'm jimmy. i'm the host. thanks to all of you for coming. very nice. by the way, i know a lot of you watch this show for our stron astronomy segment so sunday try to look up from your phones because there's going to be a total lunar eclipse and a super moon, both of them at once. that has not happened since 1982, it won't happen again until 2033, which happens be the year when snooki is expected to be seeking the republican nomination for president. this super moon is extra super, it's a blood moon, when a lunar ecrips and super moon occur at the same time and cause a total eclipse of the heart. i could be confused. seems we've had a lot of super moons lately.

i'm waiting for super moon verses batmoon to come out. [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: did you remember to tgit tonight any hoe heap you did. tonight is the rush of "grey's anatomy," "scandal," and "how to get away with murder" to abc. [ cheers and applause ] who runs all of those shows, the great and powerful shonda rhymes is here with us tonight. [ cheers and applause ] it's really unbelievable. she has three shows on abc, another one on the way, and she just sold another new show to abc yesterday. i think between shonda and busta there's so much tallent in the rhymes family it's incredible. dave salmoni is here with wild animals. a cub, a fox, a crane, this crazy-looking siberian tiger cub. we have music from jill scott if

we survive the siberian tiger. [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: pope francis arrived in new york tonight. the pope took a helicopter to wall street then caught a cab to st. patrick's cathedral. they had a big service there. the pope was in washington, d.c. this morning. he addressed greps eded congress. he gave a 15-minute speech in just under an hour. he's the first pope ever to speak before a joint session of congress. he spoke about the environment, imgrachings, he said we the people of this continent are not fearful of foreigners because most of us once were foreigners. donald trump has already started in new york. of course donald trump did weigh in on the pope. he was asked about it. he said he likes the pope very much but he doesn't agree with immigration. he said he doesn't believe in climate change or gravity. he doesn't believe in either of those things. donald trump and the pope don't have a lot in common but if you listen closely to what the pope had to say, they're really not

here. >> what's my first favorite book? the bible! the bible. and as much as i love "the art of the deal," it's not even close, we take the bible all the way, right? i watched russell brand on television the other night. what the hell was katy perry thinking when she married this guy? what a loser he is. >> jimmy: you see what i'm saying? pope francis has been the number one story on the news all week. so much so, he even somehow managed to find his way into this story from the local fox affiliate in west palm beach last night, which very deservedly earned tonight's top honors for "excellence in

reporting." >> breaking news out of west palm beach. police tell us they just arrested this man. oh, this is the wrong footage. >> jimmy: sorry, father, you're free to go. [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: mistaken identity. you know, this is the time of year which when all the tv networks premiere the new shows, premiere week. we have something to premiere tonight. my new daytime courtroom show. i have always wanted to show a host like "judge judy" or "the people's court." really. so we sent producers to l.a. county small claims court to find people who had real cases pending and asked them to allow me to hear their grievances. these are real grievances. now i am thrilled to present the premiere of my new show "judge james." >> this is the plaintiff, mella march. she claims the defendant julia sold her a pontiac then reported it stolen. she was arrested on false

$9,900. this is the defendant, julia moreno. who maintains that he's never met the plaintiff and sold the car to a third party who failed to make payments, forcing him to report it stolen. it's a case of the slipup. >> rate your right hand. >> what you are about to witness is real. participants are not actors. they're actual litigates with a case pending in civil court. both parties have agreed to drop their claims to have their case decided here by judge james. >> jimmy: i'm here. >> guillermo: thank you. >> jimmy: please be seated. >> guillermo: oh, that's my job, your honor. now you can sit in the court. yeah. you're one of the -- ligaments -- >> jimmy: what is this?

>> guillermo: ligaments. >> jimmy: legalments. >> guillermo: ligaments have been sworn in, your honor. >> jimmy: i've reviewed the ligaments. the plaintiff ornela besrer mulea march. why do you have so many last names? >> i got married recently. >> jimmy: where are you from? >> croatia. >> jimmy: suing julian moreno for $9,900 because you claim he unlawfully sold you a 2008 pontiac g-6 through craigslist that he did not own. he hadn't paid off? >> yes. >> jimmy: then you, julian, reported it stolen, causing you to be arrested? mr. moreno, you claim you never sold the car to the plaintiff, is that correct? >> correct. we put on it sale around december. and somebody answered the ad. >> jimmy: on craigslist? >> yes, two males. we met them over here on hollywood. >> jimmy: do you have any

information on these men? >> i have text messages if you want to see them. >> jimmy: from them? >> yes. >> jimmy: you still owe how much on the car? >> about $7,000. >> jimmy: they paid you how much? >> $220. just taking over payments pretty much. >> jimmy: and you did not get anything signed from them? >> no. >> jimmy: as far as an agreement to make the payments? >> it was all verbal. >> jimmy: and you trusted them to make the payments? >> yeah. >> jimmy: even though they were strangers you met on craigs list? >> right. >> jimmy: what's wrong with you? [ laughter ] >> it was my fault, all my fault. >> jimmy: it was your fault? who answered the craigslist ad when you called? >> i believe it was the defendant. because the voice, when i called, it kind of matches his voice as well. i never actually met the defendant. but i'm definitely sure that his story is fake. >> jimmy: you believe that he's not telling the truth? >> he reported the car stolen

>> can i tell you why we reported it stolen? the financial company called us saying, you're not making the payments. i told him, report it stolen, he's not making the payments, and it's making my husband's credit bad. >> this is not true. when i went to dmv and registered the car, the bank told me i owed $7,000, they said mr. julian moreno said he would pay off his loan. >> jimmy: how did you find the bank information? >> bill of sale when i bought the car, it had julian's information. >> do you have it with you, the bill of sale? >> jimmy: i'll ask the questions. do you have it with you, the bill of sale? >> the reason why i don't have a bill of sale is because all the paperwork for the car were in the car when i got arrested and all the paperwork i had in the car were taken when the bank took the car. >> i have it in text messages of the guy i was talking to. we owe payments and i told him how much the monthly payment was. >> guillermo: here you are. >> jimmy: thank you. bailiff. >> i have messages with mr. julian and his friend. >> they said the reason why

they're bringing me the car is mr. julian's wife is pregnant and he can't make it. >> is that their wife was pregnant? >> that your wife was pregnant. >> i wasn't pregnant in december. >> jimmy: i see you have this guy in your contacts as "guy we sold the car to"? >> yes. >> jimmy: you don't have his name? >> no, i don't. >> jimmy: and you have this guy listed as "pontiac owner." >> that was that day when i was buying the car, i never really changed it. otherwise i would have it as "i'm going to kill you." >> jimmy: ornela, you think that the defendants duped you somehow? >> of course. who sells a car without taking the information of the people that's going to pay off the loan? i'm a little bit stupid for not taking the pink slip but you really have to be dumb -- >> jimmy: can i say i think you're both stupid? guillermo what do you make of this? >> guillermo: i think foreign

things they're not too smart. >> jimmy: you are a witness to this? >> yeah, i was a witness. and then when we got arrested. >> jimmy: is it true that there are various gossip sites that say you are dating mick jagger? is that true? >> no, it's not true. >> jimmy: have you and mick jagger ever made love? >> no. >> jimmy: you did not? >> no. >> jimmy: it says here you work at the hat restaurant? is that correct? >> no. >> we met up at the hat restaurant. >> that's where we met them. >> jimmy: you met at the hat restaurant. does that mean arby's? >> no. it's a restaurant called the hat. >> guillermo: your honor, i have a question. >> jimmy: yes? >> guillermo: the hat is where they sell pastrami? >> the best pastrami in town. >> guillermo: i tried it. when i was in high school. it was in elhambra. >> jimmy: am i going to have you

arrested for attempt of court? >> guillermo: no, no. >> jimmy: is it true it's in alhambra? >> yes but we didn't go there. >> guillermo: the best pastrami sandwich. we should go and bring the girls girls. >> jimmy: we have a horny bailiff here. this is a complicated case. >> guillermo: yeah. >> jimmy: i have a question. you're in the car at the time of the arrest? >> yes. >> jimmy: on a scale of 1 to 10, how would you rate mick jagger sexually? and remember you're under oath. >> sorry, i don't have words -- >> her english is really bad, your honor. >> jimmy: i am going to have to go to my chambers to think -- i'd like to take some of the hot chicks from the -- >> guillermo: they're very hot. >> jimmy: from the gallery to my chambers and we'll figure this out. bailiff, collect them, i'll be back to rule. i'm going to keep your phones in case there are naked pictures on them. >> guillermo: how many? >> jimmy: as many as you can get. >> will judge james rule that the plaintiff is entitled to

arrested on charges of false vehicle theft? or was it within the defendant's legal rights to report the g-6 stolen? and did this woman do it with mick jagger? judge james' verdict when we return. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: we have to take a break. when we come back the thrilling conclusion to "judge james." very big stars stop by to read mean tweets live so stick

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>> jimmy: welcome back to the show. shonda rhymes and dave salmoni and music from jill scott on the way. first as promised we have no time to waste. it's time for the dramatic and

legally binding conclusion to "judge james." >> this croatian shopper claims she bought a car the defendant didn't own. this defendant claims he never sold her the car in question. this woman may have slept with mick jagger. this bailiff loves pastrami sandwiches. this judge is about to rule. let's listen. >> jimmy: i can totally help you with that visa thing, i'm a judge, that's no problem. oh, are we on? we're back? okay. so i went through -- >> guillermo: hold on. you can sit down right now. >> jimmy: everybody may be seated. i went through the information and the texts were sent from three different numbers. so the problem here is, we cannot find the third party, the person who was in the middle of both of these transactions. i believe both of your stories. but the burden of proof is on the plaintiff.

and since we cannot prove that the defendants defrauded you, i rule in favor of the defendants. >> guillermo: all right, follow me. >> sal: the case is concluded, judge james has rendered his verdict. let me ask you -- oh, wow. let me ask you this. did you think you were going to stroll in here and win this case because you're a bunch of hot off the chart girls? >> yes, that's how we do in europe. >> sal: i thought the same thing, i don't know what's wrong with my cousins. the beast of burden of proof got you in the end. >> i don't know. >> jimmy: another rolling stone joke. move it like jagger. wow, look at this, this one likes me. now the winners, the defendants come in. how'd you feel about judge james' verdict? >> great. >> sal: yes? >> we won, that's the best part. >> sal: you plan on rewarding judge james by naming your child after him? >> thinking about it.

>> sal: there you go. at least a tattoo or something. all right? go get me one of those pastrami sandwiches. >> on the next "judge james." >> i used to drag race myself for a lot of years. >> jimmy: drag racing when is you race dressed as a woman? >> i knew it wasn't, your honor. >> jimmy: thank forth calling me your honor, i appreciate it, it's nice. >> guillermo: very nice. >> jimmy: it is nice. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: while we're judging people, this week is mean tweets week on our show. we've asked celebrities to read the terrible things people write about them on twitter to our studio audience. and i'm going to go into the study yes audience for this, actually. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: hi, studio audience. how you doing? all right. so here's how this is going to work. just direct your attention to the curtains and welcome our first mean tweeter to the stage,

[ cheers and applause ] >> halle berry's boobs are lopsided. well, when they're real, that happens. [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: oh, sorry, i've distracted. thanks, halle. next up, tobey maguire! [ cheers and applause ] >> conspiracy theory. tobey maguire is just a hamster in a robot. not me, though, because it's [ laughter ] >> jimmy: the spelling is very bad tonight.

please say hello to naomi watts. [ cheers and applause ] >> not to sound mean but naomi watts has such a blah face. i look at it and it's just nothing. like a blank space where features should be. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: thank you, naomi. please welcome mr. george clooney! [ cheers and applause ] >> hey, george clooney. your haircut sucks. oh, and so does your sense of humor. i'm on you all night [ bleep ]. [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: there you go. thanks to all our celebrities who visited. tonight on the show, muse trick jill scott, dave salmoni is

bringing wild animals into the studio, and we'll be right back with shonda rhymes so stick around! [ cheers and applause ] >> dicky: portions of "jimmy kimmel live" are brought to you by "couples therapy with dr. jenn."

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the human ones, dave salmoni is here with us. then later - this is her latest album. it is called "woman." jill scott from the samsung outdoor stage. next week emmy winner viola davis dr. here, dr. phil, don rickles, ll cool j, priyanka chopra from the new show "quantico," michael pena, ken jeong, kate mara. plus music from fidlar, slightly stoopid, kelsea ballerini, andra day and what is this? it says matt damon will be here. no. he's not coming on the show. over my dead body he will be on this show. disregard anything you hear. matt damon will not be on the show. by the way, if you're in the new york area the week of october 19th, let's say you're hang around queens dying your hair orange, we are packing up and moving our show to brooklyn, new york, for five shows from the beautiful brooklyn academy of music. our guests will include bill murray, jay z, bradley cooper and howard stern. [ cheers and applause ] if you want tickets,

for tickets, go to kimmelinbrooklyn.com. tickets are free, and i'll also be giving out haircuts. our first guest is a very busy woman who in her spare time runs a hospital, a law school and the white house. she is, in various combinations, the creator, writer and/or executive producer of "scandal," "how to get away with murder," and this show "grey's anatomy." >> so i looked it up and bailey's the first. >> first what? >> first female chief of surgery of this hospital. >> i'd say it's all about time. >> and all the department chiefs are women. neuro. trauma. >> bad ass, ladies. this place is run by ladies. it's lady place. >> no, it is not lady place. lady place is what my grandma calls her vagina. >> jimmy: "grey's anatomy" airs thursdays on abc along with "scandal" and "how to get away

with murder." please welcome shonda rhimes! [ cheers and applause ] firstly i'd like to thank you for supplying us with our entire primetime lineup tonight. there will be no one watching this network tonight were it not for you. how you doing, you okay? >> i'm good. >> jimmy: you have so much work. what'd you do today? >> i got up pretty early. and i went to work and worked on a bunch of edits for the shows for the next episode 5 of both "grey's" and "scandal." >> jimmy: you're in a video room cutting the show? >> i'm in my office, everything's on computer. making notes, talking to the editors on the phones. we had a table read for a "scandal" episode that i gave notes on. i literally got up, jumped in the car, and came to come over here and do all of this. >> jimmy: i'm glad you're here. we have so much to talk about. you have so many things going on. and during all of those things you somehow took time to write a book? >> i did, i did. >> jimmy: it's crazy to me.

>> "the year of yes." which i sort of came up with because my sister said to me, you never say yes to anything, you never accept invitations, all you do is work, you never have any fun. i thought, okay. for a year i'm going to say yes to every terrifying thing that comes my way. and you were the first terrifying thing. >> jimmy: my wife is reading an article, an interview with you, last night. she starts reading aloud. she said, shonda rhimes said the worst thing that she ever had to do in her life was your show! i thought, well, that's flattering. >> well, for the finale of "scandal" we did that behind the scandalabra. really fun, it turned out great. but i was terrified the entire time. >> jimmy: you didn't seem scared. >> i couldn't -- i didn't think i said a word. i was a block of wood. >> jimmy: i talk a lot, i wasn't paying attention.

>> you were very kind and i was panicking, the first time i did anything like that. >> jimmy: you felt good about it afterwards? >> afterwards i felt like i survived. >> jimmy: then you decided to start taking on challenges that you might not have otherwise? >> yeah, i gave a commencement speech at dartmouth to 20,000 or something like that. i did a guest spot on "the mindy kaling show." i did a bunch of thins that would have scared the bee gees out of me before that. >> jimmy: in a way i changed your life dramatically and for the better? >> yes. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: much like oprah. >> you are my oprah. >> jimmy: thank you very much. you know who my oprah is? >> who? >> jimmy: oprah. >> of course. >> jimmy: this is pretty amazing. put this on the screen. this is the weather forecast here on kabc in los angeles, channel 7. they changed -- thursday is now tgit. they actually changed the days of the people as a result of your programming on this

[ cheers and applause ] >> terrifying. >> jimmy: that's crazy. you feel good now, you're on top of all this stuff? >> yeah. i feel like as long as i keep going, everything's good. >> jimmy: kerry washington was here on tuesday night. and i asked if she ever gets jealous that maybe you're spending more time with other shows and not paying as much attention to her and her show. she claimed that she doesn't, that she feels like you spread it around equally. is that ever in your mind? >> no. i mean, i feel like it's -- she's pretty right. kerry's always right. >> jimmy: uh-huh. >> i feel like it works really well. you know, we try to divide my time equally between "grey's" and "scandal." "how to get away with murder" is run by pete and i'm the grandmother, i hold the baby, say it's pretty, and give it back. "the catch" is new, just getting off the ground. i feel like i have it covered. >> how many seasons has "grey's anatomy" been on? >> we are in our 12th season. [ cheers and applause ]

our show started around the same time. >> yeah. >> jimmy: the actors could be actual doctors now if they had been studying medicine. >> absolutely. >> jimmy: they could get their medical degrees. >> absolutely. >> jimmy: you last season shocked the world and killed mcdreamy. which would have been unthink about. really would have been -- what a message you send to all your actors. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: watch your step or i will have you not just fired, dead! >> no, no, no. >> jimmy: no? that wasn't the message? >> 92, it was about finding a way to keep a love story alive. and i feel like meredith and derek's love story was really big and special for the audience and he couldn't just -- patrick was ready to go and it wasn't about -- he wouldn't just walk out on her. >> jimmy: i think you did the right thing, absolutely. has abc ever not purchased a show that you pitched them? >> yes. >> jimmy: they have? >> yes. in the beginning, absolutely. >> jimmy: in the beginning. wow.

do you think as a joke -- i know they're not watching this anyway. could you pitch them a show about like locksmiths or something? >> no. >> jimmy: just to see what would happen? just to see if they'd pick it up? wouldn't that be a fun thing to do? >> to our employers? i don't think so. >> jimmy: i think it would be -- i'd get a real kick out of it personally. the new show, your idea or something one of your family brought to you? >> yes, it's a different idea, "the catch." it's not my idea, it's another idea that we're executive producing. >> jimmy: i see. >> what's really great is that i love getting to do ideas by other writers. and help them get to have the same experience that i got to have. >> jimmy: it's unbelievable how hard you work. it really is. i've seen it up close. i was telling the studio audience that a lot of producers will kind of put their names on these shows and they don't even know what's on them. i know that it happens. i don't know what's going on this show, i'm hosting the damn thing. but congratulations. and great work.

and thanks for keeping us afloat. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: "grave's anatomy," "scandal," "how to get away with murder" thursday nights on abc. shonda rhimes, everybody. thank you, shonda. be right back with dave salmoni! [ cheers and applause ] an-cave. yup, he's gone noseblind. he thinks it smells fine, but his wife smells this... luckily for all your hard-to-wash fabrics there's febreze fabric refresher febreze doesn't just mask, it eliminates odors you've gone noseblind to break out the febreze, and breathe happy want to survive a crazy busy day? sfx: cell phone chimes start with a positive attitude... and positively radiant skin. aveeno positively radiantmoisturizer...

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>> jimmy: we are back. jill scott is still to come. every couple of months our next guest loads up an euchre with half a dozen wild animals he bought off craigslist and travels here to give me an allergic reaction. from animal planet, please welcome the canadian tarzan, dave salmoni. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: how are you? >> you look nervous. >> jimmy: what is going on? >> it's my new -- >> jimmy: it's like you're dating that thing. >> my new necklace. my favorite thing i've always taught you with tigers. wfooo! >> jimmy: that's a good thing? >> see if she'll talk back to you. let's try. >> jimmy: wfoooh! can you hang the leash more towards the -- yeah. hi, there. oh, wow. really is.

>> jimmy: you don't seem to have any control over her whatsoever. >> i do. i'm trying to get her to look at more stuff. obviously with these types of legs these going, what's all those people? >> jimmy: as long as she isn't looking at me. >> do you guys all chuff? aw, that's tiger talk. all it is basically telling the tiger, i'm here, i don't mean you any trouble. >> jimmy: wfoooh! >> this tiger's about 4 months. >> jimmy: 4 months old. how old are they when they go off to las vegas to work with magicians? >> usually a little younger than this. >> jimmy: a little younger, okay. >> good girl. >> jimmy: i feel like over the years i've become a little more comfortable with the wild animals -- no! i don't want to hold her, i don't want to hold her. i just want to touch her. >> i'm going to put her on the desk. >> jimmy: i absolutely don't want to hold. >> i'm going to put her here and she's going to want a hug. hold her for me. it's okay, everybody. i got her. >> jimmy: oh, boy. all right. see, that's all i was looking for, really. yeah. >> big, strong pats with these guys.

>> big, strong pats? they don't like to be petted? >> little timid -- it makes for -- you're nervous which makes her wonder why you're nervous, then she's like, hm, what's going on? >> jimmy: i'm not nervous! wfhhhhhhoooooh! >> another great opportunity, she tries to get more and more hugs. see those white spots on her ears? good girl. the big white spots help her communicate. it makes me know what she's thinking. she's telling me, i'm inquisitive. clearly about something back there. she's not totally curious because the ears aren't up. but also she's not aggressive. i wouldn't let you touch her if she was going to bite. >> jimmy: thank you. >> if she wants to bite she's going to flip her ears flat like that and show you. a big flash of the black with the white. hey, go away or i'm going to bite you! if she's trying to kill you, straight back, then you're in trouble. >> jimmy: okay, the ears are up, that's a good sign. by the way, let's put on the screen, you had a little lion cub of your own. >> i did.

about six weeks ago. >> jimmy: congratulations. [ cheers and applause ] >> that's thomas. >> jimmy: tommy john. >> i think my wife put him in a tiger suit for bonding. >> jimmy: has he met any of your animal friends yet? >> we're on our way to the zoo next week. it's sort of one of these things where my wife is sort of thinking -- she knows she can't stop it. she makes a list of the animals he can't be around. all the really dangerous things. >> jimmy: sounds like your wife has more common sense than you do. wfoooh! >> you want to go? okay. >> jimmy: good seeing you. all right. look at her, she has no problem handling the animals. >> way more confident than me. hang on. there's a treat here? >> jimmy: there's treats right here. >> can i have those? this is one of my favorite animals. >> jimmy: what is that? >> this is a crown crane. hi, sweetheart, come here. >> jimmy: where did this come from? >> this is an african -- southern and eastern african

animal. i need you to do what i'm doing. we're going to get her on a chair. >> jimmy: okay. >> you grab this. put it in your hand. she's going to peck through like the hole that you make in your hand. >> jimmy: i don't have a hole in my hand. >> stand up. >> jimmy: what hole in my hand? oh, like this, okay. >> so pat. then get out of her way. she's got a six-foot wing span. pat the couch really hard. the couch. >> jimmy: looks like a pigeon and a bottle washer had an affair. okay. >> come on, come on. good girl. come on, up here. up here. >> jimmy: isn't that dangerous? >> these are not dangerous. good girl! >> jimmy: why am i so scared, then? [ cheers and applause ] >> ow! you little pecker! ow! that hurts! >> pull your hand away. >> jimmy: put him on the thing. >> okay. >> jimmy: i didn't know that was going to hurt. that beak is sharp. >> it doesn't make you bleed.

it didn't make me bleed. oh, i don't have any more! >> good girl, good girl. obviously the thing that's most striking about these guys is their feathers. big head feathers. >> jimmy: sure, yeah. >> we saw the wing span as he jumped up. >> jimmy: yeah. it does have a big wing span. these seem like they could tear you to pieces if they wanted. >> they can. you felt how hard they peck. they can't even break the skin. >> jimmy: what about talons? >> those aren't talons, those are for standing in wet water. you can see how wide those feet are. she'll stand in a marshy area and if a practicing or rat or something comes by that big stabbing beak she's using would get her some food. >> jimmy: like wearing a pimp hat or something. >> totally. >> jimmy: we're going to take a break. we have more animals -- >> you want to feed? >> jimmy: not really, no. we'll take a break, more with dave salmoni after this be right

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>> jimmy: we're back with dave salmoni. and from animal planet. this is what? >> a fenic fox. the one thing that i like about these guys, they're north african desert animals.

they kind of wear like where they live. see how she keeps getting ready to run? i'm not going to hand her over but i'll let you feel her if she lets me. let's do that. >> jimmy: legs like a kangaroo. >> you see that fur? >> jimmy: soft. >> soft but dense. it's designed for, in the heat of the sun, you can enough itfluff it out and get in there. when it's cool at night, they flatten the pack? they eat rodents. >> anything, rodents, bugs. if i can pop his ears out. these ears are for temperature control as well. but they can actually hear things under the ground. in the sand. a scorpion will be ripping around and she'll hear and it go, womp! they look cute but deadly predator. feel his paw? how heavy that pad is? that extra padding. that's all for the hot rocks and hot sand. >> jimmy: so this guy's a little exterminator of scorpions.

>> a great external yater. have a scorpion problem, this is your guy. >> jimmy: i'm moving if i have a scorpion problem. tlrt. we have one more -- >> something cool i promise. i think. >> jimmy: this is -- >> this is my favorite. i've never in my life been able to touch one of these before. this is the first time i've ever played with a clouded leopard. >> jimmy: why? >> because they're really rare. >> jimmy: they're rare. >> it's rare in the wild -- >> jimmy: he loves you. >> she's so sweet. >> jimmy: a she. >> want to hold her? >> jimmy: no. hold her nice and tight. nice and tight. sit down, relax. >> i'll take her back. she looks good with you. >> jimmy: you think so? >> i'm going to make sure -- >> jimmy: would that help if i make a noise? >> no, she's not a tiger. i'll take her back. >> jimmy: good idea. >> the clouded leopard -- with you. >> she is sweet. so the thing that i can show you my favorite is that big clouded

so a leopard typically has black rose sets. she had cloud the spots. see how small she is? only about 50 pounds. these guys are fantastic in trees. so the problem is she lives around with -- what's wrong? it's okay. she lives around -- she can hear the tiger. >> jimmy: oh, wow. >> she is lives in nature with her. so what happens is -- then. >> oh, no. she wants a hug. she lives in trees. when she sees food she sneaks down? what kind of food? >> anything smaller than her. rodents, deer. you'll see the big long tail. >> jimmy: hang on to that leash. >> i've got her. call? >> don't let her. good girl. >> jimmy: have you ever made a phone call before? calls. maybe blue tooth. you can feel that tail, that helps for balance. pat her, don't be scared. >> jimmy: okay, all right.

>> the thing about her, she's got the longest canine teeth of any of the big cats. >> you tell me about the teeth just as i put the hand out. >> i can show you -- >> jimmy: the longest teeth? teeth? doesn't make sense. >> can you see right there? those are real long. >> jimmy: oh my god. >> for her skull size, these teeth are the longest. if her head was the size of a tiger the teeth would be longer than the tiger. those are just to help her be a massive killer. >> jimmy: a saber tooth. >> she's a really good killer. because she's got to sneak up she'll rush something and sink those teeth in. >> jimmy: unbelievable. thank you, dave. you've done it again, you've scared me senseless. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: dave salmoni. a new season of "pit bulls & parolees" airs saturday nights at 10:00 on animal planet. dave isn't on that show, though. congratulations on your baby. real be right back with jill

scott! >> dicky: the jimmy kimmel live concert series is presented by

>> dicky: the jimmy kimmel live concert series is presented by samsung. >> jimmy: i want to thank shonda rhimes, dave salmoni and thanks to all the animals and apologize to matt damon, we ran out of time. "nightline" is next but first -- her album is called "woman." here with the song "run run run," jill scott. [ cheers and applause ] na na na na na na na na na na baby mama be back in a minute gotta hustle and handle my business i'll be right back when i'm done i gotta run run run run baby gotta put food on the table mama's working and you know mama's able

through the city there's only one way to make baby go and get it overworked underpaid lord knows i need a raise but when i walk by the guys say baby do you wanna go for a ride we can cruise on down 405 look like you could be the one i gotta run run run run baby gotta put food on the table mama's working and you know mama's able i'll be right back when i'm done i gotta run run run run me oh my me myself and i and my baby i tell no lie i try for my baby every night i pray for my baby na na na na na na

na na na do. get that check and come on home and fooet feed the children. na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na i love you baby i gotta run run run run run run run run run run run run