? ? [ cheers and applause ]

cletones. where's joe's album? do i have it? it's right in front of my face. this giant square they couldn't find. it's called "blues of desperation." they're saying it's the feel-good album of the summer. so pick that up. joe will be here all night. and the multi millionaire, promoting ufc, dana white is with and this is his cd, it's called choosy lover, dino archie is here with us. next week on the show, we have a lot of guests and i'll name them noun, chris pine, salma hayek, hugh grant, morgan freeman, jojo the bachelorette, whoever she did or didn't pick.

mark consuelos, nikki glaser, steve martorano, and we will have music from kelsea ballerini, grouplove, miranda lambert, and young the giant. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: our first guest is a multi-talented fellow who has oscar and golden globe nomination certificates in a drawer and an emmy welded to the hood of his car. his new drama, "little men," opens in theaters a week from tomorrow. please welcome greg kinnear. ? [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: i like your facial hair. is this our own hair, or is this hair that belongs to a character that you're playing? >> matt damon's backstage, and he's pissed. okay? get all your jokes out now, because he's rocking up that dana white backstage. >> jimmy: i'm glad he's not so

of your life. >> matt and i did a movie called "stuck on you," it was during that phase when they were making a lot of con joined twin films. >> jimmy: i wonder if that will come back around. >> it's a cyclical cycle. and it was brought to my attention the other day, that the person who separated us was dr. ben carson. no kidding. that's absolutely true. >> jimmy: dr. ben carson. yeah, at that time, we didn't know how interesting we just thought he was a genius. >> listen, he's the only actor i've ever worked with who was able to give me an ekg after the scene was over, but, yeah -- >> jimmy: that's really crazy. have you been working all summer? >> i've been editing a movie. i directed a film at the end of last year. >> jimmy: oh, what's the title? >> it is an untitled project. >> jimmy: you should give it a title. you really need to. >> yeah.

maybe we can figure it out tonight with the audience. what's it about? [ cheers and applause ] >> a depressed dentist in the portland area. >> jimmy: depressed dentist in portland who basically meets a man who has everything who ends up taking his own life by suicide. so he's trying to save his life by finding out an unraveling mystery as to why this guy did becomes a greek plumber. >> jimmy: i have the title. drilling deep. [ laughter and applause ] >> jimmy: right? >> it's not a porn film. >> jimmy: well, we'll come up with it later, then, i guess. >> talk backstage. >> jimmy: yeah. with your family -- how many kids do you have now? >> i have three daughters.

of year? >> ?you knowhat,theydon't go to camp. my wife's from england, and this is an ongoing debate. they just don't have camps in europe as much as they do here. it's not as much a part of the culture. >> jimmy: really? >> yeah. >> jimmy: i didn't know that. >> yeah. i didn't either. so i'd like them to go to camp. but i had kind of a bad experience. i truthfully did have a very bad -- it there was a somewhat -- >> jimmy: can you tell us what happened? >> i can't tell you. >> jimmy: eh, come on. >> i was -- i'm from the midwest, from indiana. any indiana here? >> jimmy: no, we don't allow them in. go ahead. [ laughter ] >> this concludes the interview, ladies and gentlemen. i actually was at this camp as a kid. and there was a -- there was a gentleman, you know, it was

>> jimmy: i didn't, no. my parents dropped us off at a school yard and paid 25 cents. there was a tether ball pole with a deflated tether ball at the end of it. and that was our camp. >> this wasn't drastically different. you would spend the night for a week or two weeks. i was dropped off at the station wagon by my parents. got situated, went with a few friends. there was a cabin. there was a kid was somewhat of a troubled kid. he was a pain in the ass, really. he was upsetting the cool camp counsellor guy. >> jimmy: what was his name, the troubled kid? >> dougie. little dougie. i don't know why i remembered this. so this kid is nagging on this counsellor for a long period of time, and eventually i can tell that they're getting -- there's a tension building.

archery, which for some reason, i don't know why archery is the de facto, go-to sport for camp. we're shooting little archery. the counsellor, nash, cool guy, 18, got the brillo hair cut. he's like taking care of us. he's like, has anybody seen dougie? and nobody's seen dougie for a while. and he is just mia on this particular day. so we're shooting our bows and quite a ways away, suddenly a sesame seed of a kid walks up and he's shouting at the counsellor, antagonizing him, he's a jerk, he's wearing the wrong outfit. and the counsellor, in a moment of -- i'll never forget, he didn't do it to -- didn't think he was going to hurt the kid, but he did take his bow and arrow, and he shot it in the direction of this sesame seed

in this camp suddenly stop and i'm looking up, thinking, that's got some pretty good height on it. and you can see this arrow moving, moving across the sky. and sure enough suddenly little dougie raises up his arm, and has an arrow through it. he's been shot. now he's okay. he's all right. but this guy, just in an act of arrow, hit the kid, and all i remember is 30 minutes later, my parents picking me up in the station wagon. and that ended my camp story. >> jimmy: the movie is called "little men." we'll be right back.

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>> you ever think about anybody other than yourself? huh? say something, jake! say something! one of the hardest things to realize when you're a child and that your parents are people too. you understand that? they care about things.

they try to do what they think is the right thing to do. does any of what i'm saying make any sense to you? what's so funny, tony? huh? why don't you tell me what's so funny, tony. you think you got it in you to be an actor? >> jimmy: tony doesn't take life very seriously. that's "little men," opens a week from tomorrow, starring greg kinnear. tell us why you'reelling at your son and his scene there. >> jimmy: i know. by the way, your acting is so good, it makes me feel like you must be kind of a mean father. >> yeah, send those kids to camp. [ laughter ] no, honestly, they're great kids. >> jimmy: hold on, joe is exploding. okay, we're all right. >> you're all right. i'm scarred from that. the actual -- the movie is

>> jimmy: it is very good. i enjoyed it a lot. >> thank you very much. iris axe directed it. takes place in brooklyn. these two boys were fantastic in the movie. one of them is my son. create this friendship when we move into this neighborhood. unfortunately, we're forced, our family, because we have limited money, and are going through a hard time, to displace his friend and his friend's from below our little store front in brooklyn where they've been working for many years. so it's a real mixed dynamic. it's a great film. he did a wonderful job with it, and i'm very happy with it. >> jimmy: you should be. you did a great job with it too. >> when i'm not screaming. >> jimmy: well, even when you are screaming, you did a great job. speaking of your kids, i want to bring this up, because this is very impressive. this is a newspaper article about your daughter lily.

>> 12 years old. >> jimmy: and she's a karate champion. [ cheers and applause ] there's lily. you can't see her at all, but -- how did this happen? >> you know, i don't know. i don't know. >> jimmy: you were not a karate champion at that age? >> i was not. and there's nothing in our family history or lineage that would suggest that she would ever take this up. she's just very good at it and took an interest a few years ago and has gotte better and she's trained in weapons. >> jimmy: what kind of weapons is she trained in? >> well, they're like -- like jack knives or something. i don't know what they call them. these sort of sword, little miniature sword knives. >> jimmy: at the meet, does she fight the other children with knives, or is it a purely a wave them around kind of thing? >> no, i don't think they actually fight with the knives. they do have, you know, do actual fight. dana white should be here telling this.

dana could sign your daughter up. do you think that's something your daughter might one day be interested in doing, fighting mixed martial arts? >> i sure hope not. >> jimmy: what could be worse than watching that. >> first time you see a 12-year-old put a mouthpiece in, you get a little like, whoa, sure you don't want to play soccer? yeah, but she's very good in it, and very disciplined in it, and she takes it quite seriously. >> jimmy: if she continues studying, at what age will she be actually able father up. >> i think we crossed that already. [ laughter ] however, she five years away from college, so i'm perfectly fine with it. >> jimmy: combination of pride and humiliation with something like that. it's very good to see you. the movie is called "little men." greg kinnear, everybody. opens a week from tomorrow. we'll be right back with dana white from the office.

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? ? [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: welcome back. joe bonamassa sitting in with the cletones. our next guest puts more violent americans to work than anyone has before. he presides over the ultimate fighting championship. "ufc 201: lawler vs woodley" airs live, saturday night on pay-per-view. please welcome dana white. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: how you doing? well, we are fellow lass vegans. >> yes, i went to school with your cousins. >> jimmy: i know you did. gorman high school. happy birthday, by the way. >> thank you, appreciate it. [ applause ] >> i feel every minute of 47. >> jimmy: is this the happiest birthday yet after making $4 billion? >> it doesn't suck.

is that correct? >> i had 10. and then we sold a point to abu dhabi when they bought a few years ago. and then we just -- >> jimmy: so now you have $360 million, plus whatever you had before that, correct? >> i got a couple bucks. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: does it all come at once, or are there installments? is there a giant novelty check that you're presented with, like ed m it has to go through a bunch of regulation, and when the thing finally closes, yeah, i guess you get a check. >> jimmy: will you build a castle? >> you know, i'm at a point -- i'm 47. i've been working -- we've been doing this for almost 20 years. i don't know what else i need. you know? >> jimmy: that's a good way to look at it. but i can figure some things out, if you -- >> i can tell you this, and this is the honest to good truth.

me out a little bit. >> jimmy: why? >> i don't know. when you make that kind of money and -- my partners, i've been with them for 20 years. so that's all going to change. i have new partners now. and, yeah, i kind of how'd hughes'd myself up in a hotel room. didn't sleep or eat. freaked me out a bit. >> jimmy: do you have people asking you for money already? >> oh, r, [ bleep ]. >> jimmy: relatives coming out of the wood work. >> i don't answer phone calls at all. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: when you got involved with the ufc, it was a small thing. nobody was really paying attention to it. >> yeah, so the easiest version of it, i was a boxing guy. i've been in the fight game since i was 19 years old. my partner, lorenzo fertiedis, they own station casinos in las vegas. >> jimmy: that's where our band

playing saxophone in the palace station. >> did he? oh, wow. so we always said we were going to do something. i managed tito ortiz and chuck liddel at the time. and i used to get into the contract negotiations with the old owner of the ufc. and basically one day, we were on the phone. i was talking about pay-per-view and he's like, there is no pay-per-view. this thing's going out of business, we're losing money and all this stuff. and i called my at the time, i said, i think we can buy the ufc. i think these guys are in trouble. they're going out of business. a couple months later, we bought it for $$2 million. now you told it for $4 billion. have you heard from the guy you bought it from? [ laughter and applause ] >> he's like a tv guy. he had spent a lot of his own money trying to make this thing work.

>> jimmy: please send bob a million dollars. [ laughter ] >> we were inducting bob into the hall of fame. the ufc hall of fame. >> jimmy: oh, that's great, he gets a plaque. [ laughter ] >> when the deal was announced, he canceled. >> jimmy: oh, my god. poor bob. >> i love him. >> jimmy: yeah, you love him. are you a boss that your fighters are you tough? are you compassionate? >> who likes their boss? >> jimmy: well, i like my boss. he's number one. [ laughter and applause ] guillermo loves his boss. >> we all love the boss publicly. it's one of those things. at the end of the day, our fighters are independent contractors. so they can really -- i can't make anybody fight. i put together fights. i build the platform. i, you know, do all the bells and whistles, and they have to show up and deliver. but i have good relationships