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captioning sponsored by worldwide pants and cbs we would like to wish overo. >> dave: thank you.thank you evy nice. [applause] >> dave: tonight marks the25th y tradition many this woman was inducted to the rock and roll hall of fame. ladies and gentlemen please welcome the remarkable darlene

love. ♪ ♪ ♪ christmas ♪ the snow's coming down ♪ christmas ♪ i'm watching it fall ♪ christmas ♪ lots of people around ♪ christmas ♪ baby, please come home ♪ christmas ♪ the church bells in town ♪ christmas ♪ all ringing in song ♪ christmas ♪ full of happy sounds ♪ christmas ♪ baby, please come home ♪ ooh ♪ they're singing deck the halls ♪ ooh ♪ but it's not like christmas at all ♪ ooh ♪ 'cause i remember when you were here ♪ ooh ♪ and all the fun we had last year ♪ christmas ♪ pretty lights on the tree ♪ christmas ♪ i'm watching them shine ♪ christmas ♪ you should be here with me

♪ christmas ♪ baby, please come home ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ they're singing "deck the halls" ♪ ooh ♪ but it's not like christmas at all ♪ ooh ♪ 'cause i remember when you were here ♪ ooh ♪ and all the fun we had last year ♪ ooh ♪ christmas ♪ if there was a way ♪ christmas ♪ i'd hold back this tear ♪ christmas ♪ but it's christmas day ♪ please ♪ please ♪ please ♪ please ♪ please ♪ please ♪ please ♪ please ♪ please ♪ please ♪ please ♪ please ♪ baby, please come home ♪ ooh ♪ baby, please come home

♪ ooh ♪ baby, please come home ♪ ooh ♪ baby, please come home ♪ ooh ♪ oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah ♪ christmas ♪ please come home ♪ christmas ♪ please come home ♪ oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah ♪ ♪ ( cheers and applause) >> dave: oh, my gosh![cheers an] thank you everybody merrych. >> how are you doing sweetheart. >> wonderful. >> thank you so much.thank you .

darlene love, ♪ please come home ♪ christmas. ♪ oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah ♪ christmas. ♪ ♪ ♪ please come home ♪ christmas ♪ ♪ ♪ please come home ♪ oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah ♪ ♪ ( cheers and applause) [laughter] craig: ♪ chestnuts roasting by an open fire geoff: ♪ jack frost nipping at

your nose craig: merry christmas ♪ now, you know what this means? this bill bush here means -- [laughter] -- little bush here means -- no, when i light this, it means -- it marks the beginning of the great tradition every year we have at this, starting now, where we have the e-mail christmas spectacular. celebrities from all over show business come by and help us read e-mails. don't they, geoff? geoff: yes, they do. megacelebrities from different parts of the -- yeah, it is going to be great. craig: what it s like is remember when david bow we and bing crosby had their christmas special? let's pretend we're them. i'll be bowie. you be bing crosby.

geoff: hey, there, david, how are you doing? craig: i've just come by to wish you a merry christmas. geoff: well, i'm certainlyly glad. craig: when i light this bush in front of me. geoff: you're going to light a bush? craig: yes. when i light the bush, bing, this will mark the beginning. geoff: what the hell? [laughter] craig: the beginning of the christmas spectacular. do you wat to light the tree this year? geoff: i would love to light the bush. craig: you can illuminate the christmas bush. geoff: i'm trying to, you bastard, but you know i can't use my hand. craig: stop doing bing voice. you're freaking me out. geoff: what do you want me to do, man? craig: get ready.

it is christmas time. why do we always fight at christmas time? geoff: because you're a bad person! craig: this is the beginning of the e-mail christmas spectacular! yeah! [applause] >>♪ it's hard to stay up it's been a long, long day and you've got the sandman at the door but hang on leave the tv on and let's do it anyway it's ok you can always sleep through work tomorrow ok hey, hey tomorrow's just your future yesterday ♪ [captioning made possible by worldwide pants, inc., and the cbs television network] [ male announcer ] every day, thousands of people are choosing advil. i'm keith baraka and i'm a firefighter.

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[applause] craig: ♪ welcome back, everybody. welcome back. all right, geoff. let's do some christmas carols. ready? ♪ geoff: ♪ craig: ♪ geoff: ♪ craig: ♪ geoff: blaaah! craig: now, don't. see what you did there. i know you're trying to be a nice christmasy audience, trying to be supportive and give the yuletide spirit, but clearly what you did there is crap! geoff: in my defense, i have a furry ball near my mouth.

craig: no, wait! you say that like you don't often have a furry ball near your mouth. it is something that happens so often that you should be used to it by now. geoff: you have bested me, ferguson. craig: and i also said that thing. [laughter] are you feeling christmasy? >> geoff: i feel the spirit, in my pants. [laughter] craig: i get very excited about christmas. i do. i enjoy it. geoff: what do you love about christmas? craig: you know, weiners. geoff: we have something in common. [laughter] craig: you know what i like about christmas? when i was a kid, we used to get -- we used to use my dad's socks for a christmas stocking. that's all we had. we were poor. my dad's socks and when i woke up on christmas morning, there was always a little tang reend some chocolate in the socks.

-- tangerine and some chocolate in the socks. it looked like a knobby foot. to this day when i think of feet, i think of christmas. geoff: what the hell? craig: what? geoff: i was just thinking about putting weiners in socks. craig: you think about that a lot, though. geoff: that's true. craig: all right. what time is it, geoffrey peterson? geoff: it is tweetmail time brought to you by ferguson and peterson, 2012. craig: that's it? geoff: putting the peoples first. craig: that's it? geoff: that's all i got. craig: all right. play the thing. >> ♪ euro trash isn't euro litter head on the dance floor and shake your twitter bum, bum, bum, bum, bum check the tweets plus e-mails ♪

craig: ♪ and your e-mails send in you know what we should do for christmas? remember that david bowie and bing crosby sang "the little drummer boy thing"? we should do that. who do you want to do? geoff: you do a killer bowie. craig: you do bing crosby. geoff: who is that at the door? come non. craig: hello, bing. it is me, david bowie. [laughter] come to wish you a merry christmas. geoff: ba-ba-ba. nice to see you. [laughter] [applause] craig: pa rum pum pum.

geoff: i have a furry ball in my face. craig: you don't want to be walking around just wearing beads up there right now. geoff: no, no, they are likely to freeze. craig: hey, craig, is it weird that i'm 21 and worried about getting wrinkles? yeah. depends on where you're worried about getting them. parts of your body probably already got them. geoff: what the hell? craig: yeah. this is from vick from cardiff in the u.k.. have you ever been been there? geoff: oh, i love cardiff. craig: cardiff is in wales. it is the country where people talk using only phlegm and is

not. -- snot. geoff: chhhhhhhh. craig: i hope the censor isn't from wales. dear craig. i'm moving out of my flat. that's what they call an apartment. geoff: i can't see. craig: oh, dude! oh, man. your hat -- let me just get this for you. geoff: ooh! ooh! [laughter] craig: there you go. sorry, man. that's terrible! there you go! geoff: that was quite a treat. [laughter] craig: yeah. all right. [applause] vick says dear craig. i'm moving out of my flat.

should i tell my flat mate? that's what they call their roommate. i've hated every second we have lived together. should i just let bygones be bygones? geoff: just get out. the hell with that guy. craig: this is from lynn in portland, oregon, no, portland maine! oh, i hate when i get that wrong! my wife and i will be celebrating our 27th wedding anniversary a couple of days. i'm running out of ideas how the make the evening special. any ideas? you know, love. [laughter] what is the 27? you know, there is wood, gold, copper, uranium, tin. geoff: i think it is zeeng. craig: zinc. plasticine.

duct tape and hamsters. geoff: hamsters -- craig: don't say it, man. geoff: balls. craig: i like to travel but no matter where i go, no matter what type of year, i always meet british people on vacation. why is that? [laughter] dude, they live in britain. [applause] are we out of time? it is christmas, man. [laughter] yeah. can't we just do one more for christmas? can't we just do one more? [applause] could i have a day off on christmas with my little boy, geoff. he has got to have an operation. geoff: please, sir, i'm so sick.

craig: he is very sick, sir. his nut also fall off. -- nuts will fall off. geoff: please, only one of me arps. craig: please. if we could have the day off on christmas day. if you give us a day off -- you can come down to our house and stuff the goose. [laughter] geoff: in my pants. craig: we'll be right back, everybody. i wouldn't do that. pay the check?

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[applause] craig: ♪ welcome back, everybody! welcome back. welcome back to the big e-mail christmas spectacular where -- [applause] come on. let me finish! [applause] i'm very excited. i'm very excited. nothing -- nothing says christmas to me like a whole show devoted to e-mails and fun. right, geoff?

geoff: you said it, pal. craig: that's right. are you looking forward to christmas? have you gotten anything stuffed in your stocking or are you looking forward to get ig anything stuffed -- geoff: ho, ho, ho. craig: you're going to stuff a ho in your stocking? geoff: yeah, not just one but three. craig: what do you do at christmas at mid nights? geoff: i stand here and someone puts a star on my head and calls me a christmas tree. craig: who is that somebody every year, geoff? geoff: it's you. craig: what the hell, man? you should wear that hat year-round. you know why? you look awesome. you look like -- no, you don't, actually. it is kind of fun. did you -- i -- are you trying to shake it off? geoff: i'm trying to get this fuzzy ball near my mouth. can we do that? no, no, no good?

craig: can he say that? he can? don't put that fuzzy ball near your mouth, just yet. [laughter] all right. you want to do the e-mails? geoff: sure. craig: well, what time is it, geoffrey peterson? geoff: it is tweetmail time. time to reach into santa's bag and give him a tickle. craig: play a jingle or two. >> touch me with your e-mail love me with your tweet text me with your fingers sex me with your feet touch me with your e-mail love me with your tweet text me with your fingers sex me with your feet ♪ [applause] craig: ♪ and you thought cbs showed their contempt for this show by giving us no ooh-la-la money!

voila! take that, new york! [laughter] all right. who's that at the door? >> ♪ [applause] craig: johnny! johnny! johnny galecki from "big bang theory." what a surprise! johnny. i haven't seen you since a couple of days before thanksgiving! >> it has been ages, hasn't it? craig: it has. you look great, pal. are you ready for christmas? >> i halftime craig: do you go door to door delivering things from your sack? >> only a matter of time. craig: can you help me with the traditional st