>> jay: we'll talk more about this after the show. but yes, no, i agree. >> so, there's another very attractive picture in here too. what does it say? oh, i've never been one to shy away from my sexuality. i always saw you as that kind of person. >> absolutely, yeah, yeah, yeah. i mean, everyone's different. but for me, i always -- i'm an artist, and -- you know, expressing myself in a sexual way, no matter what -- how that changes throughout the years has always been something that comes naturally to me. easy. but at this point in my life, i'm 32, and i feel sexier than ever, just because you know what you want. [ cheers and applause ] >> jay: and you're still very young. >> thank you, thank you. >> jay: you are very young. >> yeah, so it was all about -- you know, the shoot -- yes, i was in control of that, it was all just about -- appreciating the woman i've become and effortless sexy. not trying too hard. >> jay: what's the biggest mistake guys make with women, do you think? when guys come on to you, what's the biggest mistake they mean?

>> i think -- effortless sexy is key. i think just -- everybody says be yourself, but i just don't try too hard. that's the biggest turn off. and trying to be too macho, and all that stuff. that kind of doesn't work for me. i like -- it's all in the details, it's the thoughtful things that count. >> jay: the small things, okay. >> yeah, yeah, yeah. listening and seeing what might impress the girl and -- in a genuine way. >> jay: okay. now, i'll change and go completely the other way. how's max. how's your son doing now? >> uh, amazing. the biggest priority in my life. >> jay: he's five right? >> yeah, yeah, yeah. he's starting a new school, so transition stage. yeah, bought a new house, he's going to a new school. so it's a lot for the little guy. he's great. he's just -- he's the joy of my life. >> jay: his first day of school was when -- it must have been a a couple days ago? a week ago? >> yeah, well, it was like last week, pressing you know -- my micro managed self-i was -- it was like my first day going back to school. i was like, are other parents going to like me?

>> jay: i think the dads will love you. i think the dads -- [ laughter ] i think more dads will show up on pta night if you are there, really. [ laughter ] >> jay: tell me about -- so you got a new house -- i imagine you micro managed that too? >> oh, yes. yes. i'm, you know -- >> jay: tell me about the house. what's it like? is it your dream house? or is it just a house? >> no, no, it's so peaceful, and it's private. it's got this beautiful backyard, and lots of grass for the dog to run around, and just tranquil. you know, it's away from cameras or star tours and all that stuff. a moment for me to breathe. >> jay: that must be awful, if you're in the gated area you don't get the paparazzi hanging outside your house. >> yeah, i can just be normal. i can just go -- you know, if i want to go in my front yard and grab the paper and have a cup of coffee you know and have my hair in curlers or whatever it is -- you know i can just do that. without feeling like a camera is gonna -- >> jay: cause' two doors down from me is david beckham and his wife. >> okay. >> jay: so when i first came home one night i went "oh,

wow!" something must have -- i drove right by. they were like -- just hanging in the street. have you met your neighbors yet? >> surprisingly enough, i just found out that shakira is my neighbor. so i think -- yeah, she's -- [ audience ohs ] i'm like -- i'm gonna going to go in my backyard with my new apple trees, and lemons. take a fruit basket and go knock on her door and we haven't actually formally, i don't think, met so far. yeah, so, we're interchanging with "the voice." yeah, i'm going to go knock on her door. >> jay: there's the real housewives show i would watch. >> yeah, yeah, yeah. >> jay: look, we'll take a a break. more with christina, right after this. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ any last requests mr. baldwin? do you mind grabbing my phone and opening the capital one purchase eraser? i need to redeem some venture miles before my demise. okay. it's easy to erase any recent travel expense i want. just pick that flight right there. mmm hmmm.

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♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jay: welcome back. talking with christina aguilera. and, you made "time" magazine's 100 most influential people. >> yeah. >> jay: that's pretty good. [ cheers and applause ] and "maxim," yeah. >> yeah. well, i do it all. >> jay: how did you react when you heard about this? that's pretty cool. >> well, this particular -- you know, honor, it was for my humanitarian efforts. and you know i've dedicated a a lot of my time and efforts -- over the summer also, i took a a trip. i help feed hungry women and children. with world hunger, the wfp, the world food program and the u.n. -- >> jay: you're like, you're a a u.n. ambassador, right? >> yes, yes. for world hunger. and i go and i take these field trips and really go, you know, meet the people who need food, and the people that you're helping to nourish.

i went to rwanda -- [ cheers and applause ] >> jay: so tell me about -- you said before this trip came at a perfect time. why was it the perfect time? >> yeah, you know, i think being in this business -- you know, i've been doing it in front of the camera in one way or another since i was seven. so working, working. and sometimes you just need to step out of this box and just -- i don't know, just connect with other things happening in the world, and see what's happening and live it. and it was really, really moving, and really touching for me just because i needed a a break from the cameras over the summer. taking a season off for "the voice" to just sort of experience life again. and outside of the big red chair. >> jay: we have a tape here, let's see, maybe you can talk us through it. what's -- what's going on here? >> oh, right here, this is how, you know, they provide jobs for, you know, these -- these people to, you know, have somewhere to go for a meal. to make for themselves, do for themselves. and yeah, like, look how happy they are.

you know, it's moments like that, and it doesn't have to be so sad, but, yeah, i visited the -- refugee camps, and it was very emotional. but these are -- >> jay: the kids look happy. >> -- these are hopeful moments. and i think it's important for all of us to sort of reach out and connect on some universal level. [ cheers and applause ] >> jay: well, that's great. that's wonderful. that's wonderful. now, "the voice." is it fun being back with the gang? does it feel like you've been away? >> yeah. yeah, it's like, you know, like, coming back to school in a way. it was -- the kids at school. and the boys are fun, and you know, we know each other by now. we know our ins and outs, and i just think i wanna go, and i wanna have a good laugh. there's something about the four of us getting together, we can't be serious for more than -- 30 seconds. we're just -- i don't know, the guys make me laugh. and you got your cowboy, you got, you know, adam like -- you know, the prankster, and he's like constant energy, and then there's chill cee lo. i don't know, they're just different dynamics and i enjoy time with them. >> jay: let's talk about that cowboy fella. he's on a bit of a streak now.

blake -- i mean, he's won what? four? three or four? >> yes! i came back, i was like, "is this now called 'the blake shelton show?'" 'cause he's won like, three, you know, times in a row. >> jay: how cocky is he? is he cocky now do you find? little bit of attitude? >> he definitely -- he had these "voice" trophies made with the peace sign. and he brings -- he had them all, he's carrying them all out. and he stas, you know, whenever he goes to do his sales pitch quote, unquote to getting someone on his team. he's like, "here are three reasons why you should pick me as your coach." [ laughter ] you know? so, he's a little boastful, but i let him have it. >> jay: i like that when you make your own trophies. but you're as competitive as ever, right? we have a clip here. let's take a look here. let's see what's going on. >> get it, has to get you. [ cheers and applause ] >> you know, adam is great, he's a great sales pitch. but coming back, with refreshed ears, i want to take this thing home. adam just wants to, you know, chill and relax. you know, he's been through this many times. >> yes, he has. you're right about that, christina. >> thank you, blake.

[ laughter ] see, see, this is a winning chair. >> that's right. that's right. >> he's feeding me good vibrations. even though -- >> don't take my vibrations away. [ laughter ] no, stop. stop it! >> look, you guys wanna go with the guys and the whole thing, i get it, but please break that cycle. let me be the first female coach to win this thing. [ cheers and applause ] i am on your side. please. [ cheers and applause ] >> jay: good job, congratulations. new season starts on monday, right? >> yes. >> jay: christina, good luck. >> thank you. >> jay: be right back with joy behar. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ one way or another i'm gonna find ya i'm gonna getcha getcha getcha getcha one way or another i'm gonna win ya i'm gonna getcha getcha getcha getcha one way or another i'm gonna see ya i'm gonna meetcha meetcha meetcha meetcha one day, maybe next week i'm gonna meetcha, i'm gonna meetcha, i'll meetcha

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♪

[ cheers and applause ] >> jay: all right. i enjoy having my next guest here. she's an emmy award-winning comedian, who recently left the morning chat show "the view" after having spent the past 16 years there. it is not the same without her. please welcome the always funny and outspoken joy behar, joy. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> jay: good to see you, i miss you on "the view." what are you doing these days? >> i love that love mat, by the way, i used it backstage. >> jay: really? [ laughter ] did you really? get ready for the show. >> the whole band was with me. [ laughter ] >> jay: at least we know how you got the job. well anyway, good to see you. >> yeah, really. >> jay: i'm dying to know, have you watched the new "view" yet? >> yes. yeah. of course. >> jay: how is it going? how's it look? >> it looks fine. i'm missing --

but you know. i'm missing from the picture. what's wrong with this picture? she's not there. it's okay. >> jay: jenny's doing okay? >> jenny mccarthy. lovely girl. controversial. she's against inoculation. >> jay: is that right? >> yeah. but she loves the beef injection i heard. [ audience whoas ] well who doesn't right? christina am i right? >> jay: but who doesn't really? >> who doesn't? >> jay: the kids today with the beef injections. now elisabeth is at "fox and friends." did you catch her debut over there? >> no, i did not. >> jay: no? >> i don't even know where fox is. >> jay; wow. really? >> i don't know how to find it on the thing. >> jay: see you should go to fox. you would be good there. >> they wouldn't let me in the building. >> jay: i enjoyed you and elisabeth sort of banter. i enjoy watching a little bit of controversy. >> that was fun. i agree with that. people may be, they don't like to see us fight, so. >> jay: 'cause i always would enjoy it. you always were kind of opinionated. my mother -- >> kind of opinionated? >> jay: use the word lippy. my mother would say, "oh she's a lippy one at one is she?" did you ever get in trouble with guests? did you have anything where you'd have to apologize >> on the view?

i got in trouble a lot. i mean, people don't know how much trouble i got into. i got in trouble with donald trump. >> jay: what did you do -- everyone gets in trouble with donald trump. >> i must have said something like he wears a wig one time. and he got really pissed. i don't like to get in trouble with donald. so then we got. i brought this with me to read to you. it's a letter i got from trump's people. trump is livid about the comment joy made on air yesterday. he does not wear a wig. she can come over -- this is the real thing, she can come over to the office and pull it, the hair. [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] stop it! and see for herself that it won't come off. people over there need to check their facts before running their mouths. >> jay: wow! >> that's one. then -- let's see -- >> jay: why do you have to put it in your bra? >> christina: i love it. i love this. i get in trouble all the time too. >> jay: you want to keep donald close to your heart? >> i guess. what else. >> jay: who else did you apologize to? one time i got in trouble with

dr. ruth. yeah. i mean, i -- i did, i was on the radio one time, we were talking about sex on an airplane. so i said to her, "did you ever have sex on an airplane?" she's like, "joy, i do not talk about my personal sex life," and she hung up on me. >> jay: it's not like i asked her to go up on my husband, yo knowhat i mean? [ laughter ] >> jay: right. [ applause ] i just like the route you took to get to that joke. you had the up on the husband joke. you had to go around it to get to ruth. >> and i've always enjoyed her work with "the wizard of oz." and i don't want to really tick her off. [ audience ohs ] >> jay: who else did you apologize too? didn't you get in trouble with -- was it tiger woods? >> yes, tiger woods. well, he had this girlfriend, i guess, rachael uchitel, you remember her? >> jay: yeah. >> so my comedian mind said something like, "you could tell she's a hooker." [ laughter ] >> jay: right. >> so i got in a lot of trouble for that, because she's not a a hooker.

i want to say that right now. i got -- they were going to sue abc. she got gloria allred, the big dog out, after me. i just want to say, "you could tell she's not a hooker," and get off my back. that was that. >> jay: did you like hot topics? that was always a fun thing to do. >> oh you know, speaking of hot topics, i was reading this in the paper about you and sharon osbourne? >> jay: stop it. [ cheers and applause ] >> did you see this? >> christina: no i didn't. >> jay: what is it? is that the "new york times" you're reading? >> no, it's not. it's the globe. it's some other rag. i don't know. but they say here -- i love this is my fave. i just found it from the makeup room. he has these in his makeup room. he's reading these all day. [ light laughter ] >> jay: no, i just -- i have to admit this is the first time i've seen this. >> oh, bologna. >> jay: you brought this one with you. >> sharon says the comic was a a good kisser. >> jay: oh. >> but doesn't remember the sex. hello, not that -- [ laughter ] but she says, she adds, coyly, as only sharon can do, "there's a reason god gives people those

chins." and i found out the reason why. [ audience whoas ] [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] >> jay: i have no idea what that means. >> christina: i love that. >> jay: stop it! stop it! >> so, you know. >> jay: good night, everybody, good night, see you next week. thank you. jimmy fallon will be here tomorrow night, good night, everybody. >> christina and i would like to know what that means. that you give good chin or what. what does it mean? [ cheers and applause ] >> jay: gentlemen never discuss -- i don't like those kinds of guys that go around -- this happened when we were both single. and -- do you know the actual story? what happened was, she had seen me at the comedy store, i had never met her. she got my phone number, and she called me every night at midnight, and we talked for an hour. >> she stalked you? >> jay: no, she was calling me, she wouldn't say who she was. she had this british accent and was very intelligent. and i thought, this is sort of fascinating. real interesting, two or three weeks of this. finally i said, let's get together.

and we went out. >> and then you had sex with her. [ cheers ] >> jay: people go out. >> who did you hook up with back in the old days? >> i was married. >> jay: i don't want to bring up the giuliani thing, but -- [ cheers ] >> talk about a hair issue. [ laughter ] >> jay: let me ask you, you must have had a lot of fun with the new york mayoral race and you had spitzer there too. he ran for comptroller. anyway, then i worked at current tv, and he had a show there. he was like on the air again after the whole thing, and he interviewed me or i interviewed him. afterwards, i said, "was that good for you, elliott?" he said, "i've never been asked that question in this context." [ light laughter ] the only thing about it is that, before i worked with him, i had this song that i had written about him, to the tune of "gilligan's island." and so every time i would see him at current tv, this song would come into my head. >> jay: and what was the song? >> well i can only remember what one -- ♪ just sit right back and you'll hear a tale a tale of a a man named spitz by day he was

working hard for us by night he was renting pimps ♪ like that. [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] >> jay: that's a lovely song. it's a beautiful song. >> christina: i love it. it's great. >> it's catchy. >> jay: christina's not the only songwriter on the panel tonight. >> that's right, baby. >> jay: and you're in "people" magazine this month? >> oh don't bring that up. my age -- they're constant with my age. >> jay: first of all, this magazine is five years old. [ cheers and applause ] >> can you imagine. christina needs to absorb this. i'm twice your age and then some. >> christina: well i hope to be as good looking at your age and just as ball busting, right? i love that. >> jay: the last time you were on this show i asked you how old you were, do you remember what you said to me? >> no. i said [ bleep ] you. [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] that's right. but now it's all over the place. >> jay: but it says gorgeous at

any age. >> who cares about that, wikipedia has it. syria has chemical weapons. in other news, joy behar is 70. i mean, it never stops. [ laughter ] it never stops. >> jay: i know you love l.a., this is your kind of town. >> i hate it. >> jay: why do you hate it? [ laughter ] what is that? >> because i'm scared here. i'm driving around, i don't know where i'm going. it's too big. >> jay: that's because you're 70. >> christina: no, no. [ laughter ] i don't drive because of that reason. >> are you aware of the fact that you have to stop for pedestrians here? >> christina: this is why i don't -- >> you have to stop. >> jay: oh, you don't like having to stop for pedestrians? >> i didn't know that. i go past this pedestrians and the guy yells out, "bitch." [ laughter ] i turned around and said, "i wonder if there's someone here who knows me." [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] >> jay: you get road rage? you seem like you would get -- >> i'm not allowed to drive. my husband, steve, who's a a jewish boy, he does not

really allow me to drive. >> jay: he doesn't allow you to drive? >> no, he doesn't. no matter what happens, he thinks i'm a bad driver. i was following a state trooper one time on u.s. 1 when he fell asleep, so maybe that was it. we were in italy one year, i'll tell you this story. we were in italy, we went to sicily, have you been there? >> jay: haven't been to sicily. >> it's beautiful. we go to mt. etna, which is a a volcano, right? we're driving and driving up the volcano, and it's very precipitous and scar and he's going higher and higher. suddenly he pulls over and says to me, "i can't see." "you can't see? on my vacation?" [ light laughter ] >> jay: how selfish. >> my vacation. two minutes ago he was mario andretti, now he's stevie wonder. [ laughter ] so i say to him, "listen, i'll drive." "no, i'll drive," he says. he would rather drive blind than let me drive. [ light laughter ] >> jay: well, he is a very smart man, yeah. how long do you stay here in l.a.?

>> me? until this show's over. [ laughter ] no, i'm doing bill maher on friday. >> jay: oh, you're doing bill? >> i'm doing his show, not doing him. [ laughter ] >> jay: right, right. i figured you had to do him to get the show. i know how that works. >> i'm too old for that. >> jay: this is barbara's last year as well? >> barbara's leaving. she fired me one time, you know. >> jay: she fired you once? >> she actually did. we were at the -- you want to hear this story? >> jay: yeah. >> you want to hear this, christina? >> christina: i would love to. i'm so enjoying this. >> jay: if she said no, you won't tell me. it's my show. tell me the story. >> not for long. it's the emmy time, and rosie o'donnell was coming on the show. but it was a big secret. she was going to announce it at the emmy's. i was supposed to keep my mouth shut. and everybody else was told, "do not say a word to the press," you know, until she announces it on the emmy's. i was trying to be really good, now i'm in the gift shop at the emmy's. did you ever go there, they have fabulous stuff. i'm in the gift shop. i'm shopping. there's a watch, there's stuff they're giving you there, panty

hose, spanks, everything you need. and "entertainment tonight" comes up to me, and they go, "oh, joy, are you happy that, how do you feel about rosie coming on the show. i said, "oh, i'm thrilled, i think it's great." and then i continue shopping. then i realize what i had just done. i opened my mouth. i -- you ever feel like you're going to have a heart attack. my chest started to get hot. and tonight -- they called the publicist, maybe "entertainment tonight" won't announce it until after she does it about so i say, okay, i go back around have my hair done, sitting there. the phone rings. "hello, joy? it's barbara." i say, "hi, hi, hi barbara." she says, "i just got a call from "entertainment tonight" to tell me it's been announced that rosie o'donnell's coming on the show, and guess who told them that news?" i said, "joy behar?" [ laughter ] she goes, "yes. and i just want you to know, i'm not renewing your

contract." so i said, "look, barbara, i'm sorry, it was a mistake." "it was a big mistake, i'm not renewing your contract." i said, "come on, barbara, give me a break." >> you have to go, is that why you're -- >> jay: if you have to go, you have to go. >> well, anyway, i didn't get fired. i got back on the show, and now i'm off the show. >> jay: now you're off the show joy behar, very funny. joy, thank you. we'll be right back, with valerie june. [ cheers and applause ] ♪