tv Jimmy Kimmel Live ABC March 17, 2016 11:35pm-12:37am EDT
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>> jimmy: hi, everyone. i'm jimmy, i'm the host. thank you for watching. thanks for coming. patrick's day to all of you. i see a lot of green shirts in the audience. here in l.a. we celebrate a little differently than the rest of the places. we don't have pots of gold, we have pots of pot here.hem medical marijuana dispensaries. st. patrick's day in america is the best day to be irish and the worst day to be an uber driver. i looked this up, st. patrick used the image of a shamrock, the three-leafed clover, to teach the doctrine of the holy trinity, the son, and the holy ghost. then he got everyone totally smashed, really super drunk, and
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whole rest -- did you know after st. patrick trove thereland he went to mexico and drove the worms into the tequila bottles? >> guillermo: that's right, you're right. >> jimmy: how much have you had to drink today?ots. >> jimmy: two shots of what? course. >> jimmy: yes, the traditional st. patrick's day drink. show. st. patrick's day tradition. this is my number one favorite of all the traditions we have. ten years ago this week, in story hit the air in mobile, alabama. a leprechaun sighting that caused quite a stir and resulted in what might very well be thereport of all-time. >> curiosity leads to large
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>> looks like a leprechaun to lse saw the leprechaun, say yes! >> jimmy: if that doesn't make you believe in leprechauns, nothing will. but re. >> eyewitnesses say the leprechaun only comes out at night if you shine a light in its direction it suddenly disappears. this amateur sketch of you say the leprechaun looks like. >> jimmy: how can that be an amateur sketch? you think you'd see that hanging in a museum.e thought it was a leprechaun. some people were more practical. one lady in the neighborhood had an entirely different thers find it hard to believe and have come up with their own theories for the image. >> got to be a crackhead.get up in the tree and play a leprechaun. >> jimmy: and that's the story of st. patrick's day. [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ]obile, alabama. st. patrick's day celebrations are under way just about
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cousin sal is at rocking riley's irish here now. cause sin sal? >> sal: jimmy, what's happening? >> jimmy: oh, look. what is the mood like at rockingight now? >> sal: it's pretty mellow. we've just been discussing our taxes and stuff like that.duce us to some of the people there with you. >> sal: to my left here is dano. >> what's up? >> sal: kelly. and john the occasion. >> hey, jimmy. >> jimmy: jon, dano, kelly. we have something tonight, we're going to compete to see who can pour the perfectss. okay? so let's go to our bartender jimmy who has got -- there's an art to this, right? >> there's an art. how are you?. >> the first thing is going to
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then you've got to hit the hump in the back. >> jimmy: okay. >> once it gets over the you pull it up right here and you put it right there and wait till it sets. >> how long do you have to wait until it settles? >> you're supposed to wait 118that's the hard els part of the perfect pour, not being able to drink it. >> jimmy: 1 ache 18 seconds? >> two >> jimmy: take a spot on the right, get in the middle -- the leprechaun's on the wall, look at that. right next to dano's head, how about that. the amateur sketch.. there you go. 45-degree angle. >> go for it, guys. >> 45-degree angle, hit the harp, and there they go. jimmy: pull it, kelly. kelly? dano looks's doing there. kelly?
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stop!nk somebody named kelly would be better at something all right. well -- >> put them down, guys. >> jimmy: but them down. kelly went o how did yours come out? john went under. i think we're going to have to give this -- >> john's short. >> jimmy: are we going to have to give this to dano? >> you you won some corned beef, congratulations! [ cheers and applause ] >> sal: the guinness is on me! you, cousin sal. thanks, guys. thank you. we couldn't hear anything cousin sal said. i think he bought drinks for everyone at the bar, right?t. as if there wasn't enough drunken madness on st. pat ddy's day, and i engage in the cherished annual tradition of scrolling through
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to find something called trutv. which turned outannel 108. between the games and st. patrick's day this is the least productive work day of the year in the united states of america.good show tonight. from "bad man versus superman: dawn of steel". [ cheers and applause ] it's sad. there aren't any phone booths into anymore. he has to change in the bathroom at starbucks now. also with us from "empire," gabourey sidibe and st. patrick's day music from flogging molly. before all that it's time to bleep and blur the big tv moments of this week whether they need it or not, it is "thisary censorship." >> i got to tell you i've never
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>> this afternoon, not so good, that's when things really get [ bleep ]ed up. >> you should get home to that incredible husband. i want to [ bleep ] sarah.leep ] pam. i want to [ bleep ] pam's mother most importantly. >> nice to have you here for once where nobody's [ bleep ]ing. >> we can pass a federal law to endut we sure can try to regulate it. >> before long, some republican is going to start [ bleep ]ing hillary clinton. >> my father was [ bleep ] all he was. >> sir, one difference between this and a donald trump rally is i'm not asking anyone to [ bleep ] you in theis the last big [ bleep ] before those elections on tuesday. [ bleep ] at stake. >> [ bleep ]ing your dog can take a lot work.g a turtle? >> brook has turned me on to what i call the diesel which is just black [ bleep ].
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when we come back, i think you're going to like this. if you're on snapchat you're familiar with dj khaled. if you're not, a and a mogul. he's become famous all over the world for his life-affirming messages like this. >> life is like the sky. some days going to be a lot of clouds with a lot of skies. give thanks for the sky. >> jimmy: did you give thanks all right. well, that's a good reminder.back, dj khaled teaches me to snapchat. we have major key alerts ahead
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>> jimmy: hi, there. welcome back. henry cavill, gabourey music from flogging molly is on the way. "time" magazine releases their list of the most influential people on the internet. when they announce the nominees of the nobel like the opposite of that. the list includes donald trump, caitlyn jenner, kanye west, and a bunch of other people who should never be president the united states. but also on the[ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: outside on the list was dj khaled, very popular on snapchat. millions follow his every move. and i have to admit i don't know the first thing about snapchat so i asked dj ke me under his wing and into his limo and later to his hotel room. and the result was this., dj khaled, we the best. >> jimmy: we both have beards,
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>> jimmy: i don't know. >> we've got to get him on snapchat. did you discover snapchat? >> i would think around october. >> jimmy: of last year? >> yeah. >> jimmy: wow, it was that fast. >> yeah.how you how to snapchat. the key is to be yourself. a major key to snapchat is spread positive energy. was a big key when i got lost at sea with my jet ski. >> jimmy: right. >> the key is not to drive your jet ski in the dark. alerted all my fans to make sure i made it back safe. >> jimmy: they saved your life. >> yes, that's the key. don't fall for the trap. and the key is to secure the's the key. >> jimmy: how many keys are there? >> you can never run out of keys. >> jimmy: that's a lot of keys. >> yes, a lot of keys. >> like a key chain. >> is that a lot of keys, man.
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you see my side of the car -- >> jimmy: this man's been running like a mile and a half. should we stop and see why he's running? >> can you roll the window down? fan, what's studio, man -- >> i respect that, we'll buy the whole thing. jimmy, that's fan love. that's what i mean about the jimmy: oh, all right. >> no one has that. >> jimmy: you have to give the fans money? >> no, no. he's hustling and i respect that. >> jimmy: oh, i see. >> know what i'm saying? matter of fact, i ain't got no ot some? i'll pay you back, jimmy. >> jimmy: here's $100. >> $100 from jimmy kimmel. >> you're trying to stay in shape -- >> give me those candies! >> ihe young hustlers, they could be selling something else. >> jimmy: you're right. >> and they selling candy or tennis know not to play myself. >> jimmy: what does that mean, play yourself? >> you've got to know when to do certain things and when not to
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>> jimmy: you got to know when to hold them, know when to fold them, you know got to know when to walk away -- >> another key is never fold? >> never fold. >> jimmy: what did you have an 8 and a 2? stay in? >> see, i deal with real-life i can't play the game. that's a game. never fold. you know? >> jimmy: okay. >> jimmy, we're about to have >> jimmy: oh, good, i'm looking forward to bungalow talk. >> life. so this the bungalow. i got some of my team ine for some bungalow talk. how are you? >> we come to the pun ga low, you see bungalow mogul, mogul stuff. on the cover of "bloomberg."r of "hot living." >> jimmy: is this your hand? >> that's not my hand. >> jimmy: look at this. >> i love fruityeah. >> they found out and they sent
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can you show the listerine they made for me? >> jimmy: you have special >> listerine is a major key to success. i love listerine -- >> jimmy: they sent to it you. >> snapchat with>> jimmy: enjoying listerine. >> the best breath. don't ever play yourself. that's what's cope dope about we're just having fun but we captured it. we ain't talk about it, we ain't act it, we aunt doing none of that, we catching the vibe. >> jimmy: we the best.nature candles. >> jimmy: oh, yeah, they put cinnamon toast crunch in the wax. >> yeah. >> jimmy: is thisnow? let me ask you a question. >> jimmy: yeah? >> did you ever yourself with hate, somebody said you'd never have a jimmy kimmel show?
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i have to say that something that inspired me to work it is, we're filtering out, we're exposed they now. i said, they don't want me on jimmy kimmel. guess what? jimmy kimmel made sure i'm on john mccain. >> jimmy: they want people to call me jimmy kimmel. you call me body. is for both. >> i'm being honest with you. give thanks that we're saying your name in a great way. >> jimmy: right, right. >> that's all that matters. >> i do, i'm grateful. >> what you're going to do is hold this button. right? then you're going to be like, sneaker talk! reveal it! when they reveal it, major you got to know how to angle it. you got to swag it out. know how to angle it like this. look. >> jimmy: that's going to be
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>> vibe. you got to -- know what i'm saying? >> jimmy: yeah. all right. what do i say at the dipping? >> jimmy: sneaker talk! major key alert! [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ]lthough the internet. >> well, i love your style, man. now you put your caption. >> jimmy: right. >> on yours. i want to putt, know what i'm saying, because i think they'll talk about you doing this. all right. boom. and it's sent. >> jimmy: sert! it's cocoa butter. i never put cocoa butter on. >> let me put some on. all right, cool. this is the key, though. the glow. >> jimmy: it does smell good. >> it really does. i got to be honest with you too.
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>> jimmy: what do you everything. >> everything. >> jimmy: really? wow. you know, i have to say, between -- i came here to learn about snapchat. but you taught mee a lot about life, you taught me about cocoa butter. >> yeah. >> jimmy: candles, even. and i thank you for that. >> man, so in love, should we shave? i want you -- not only do i want to shake, i want you to feel how moist my skin is. smooth. >> live life smooth. why live rough? kimmel and dj khaled. we're cocoa buttering up and we want you to have cocoa butter too. >> live life smooth. enjoy. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: thank you, dj khaled. music from flogging molly, gabourey sidibe is here, be right back with superman henry cavill! icky: portions of "
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are brought to you by the brewers of guinness, who want to wish you a happy st. patrick's day. please drink responsibly. man, i might just chill tonight.y... puppymonkeybaby... puppymonkeybaby... puppymonkeybaby... puppy...onkey... ...baby ...puppymonkeybaby... puppymonkeybaby... rt. dew. juice. caffeine. whaaaaat? i can pour this champagne on my phone and it still work. whaaaaat? [phone ringing] kenny, i'm 'bout to put
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pretty great prank on me on our wedding day.ry later. then, to celebrate st. patrick's day properly a band from here in their single is called " the hand flogging molly from the samsung outdoor stage. next week, we have many excellent guests, starting off elizabeth olsen, tom hiddleston, jon bernthal, peter krause. granger smith,y. and hillary clinton will be here. i think she's running for president. breed of actor who can play both the man from uncle and the man of steel. starting one week from tomorrow, you can see him alongside an v. superman: dawn of justice."
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cavill! [ cheers and applause ] ou tip thish one? this is a bad pour? warm one up for you. >> jimmy: by the way, for those who are alarmed, r country. you are from england. do they celebrate st. patrick's day in england? >> yeah, it is -- it's a little bit bigger >> jimmy: it is bigger out here? interesting. >> it's bigger out here than it is anywhere else in the world, including ireland. >> jimmy: including ireland, that seems foolgish >> no! >> jimmy: i think cinco de mayo is bigger here than in mexico. i think we have a drinkingt is. >> no, no. it's not a problem. >> jimmy: not at all, no. by the way, you're such a muscular guy. i was thinking about this.
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superman, in order to become muscular, it's impossible, right? because he would have to like curl with the statue of liberty >> yeah. >> jimmy: in order to have the resistance to build superman's muscles he'd have to be bench pressing the world. >> real superman would look more like me. he would be -- his muscles would be atrophied and fat. >> yeah, yeah, i can get that,: can superman get drunk? >> it would take a lot. >> jimmy: it would take a lot, it would. why? >> probably take special paddy day shots. little green the green ones are no good. superman's got to be terrified on st. patrick's day. >> horrified. know where the kryptonite is coming from. your instagram account, i want to -- before we show this, tell me why you did this. >> there's been so much validity of superman's disguise. which is the glasses. >> jimmy: yes.
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reasonable disguise. so i put it to the ou went out on the street, to times square in new york. >> yes. >> jimmy: and -- let's show the video and we can talk through this. here we are. hanging around at times square. underneath the posters. the actual posters thaton it. >> the only person who stopped us was someone who was asking for directions to central >> jimmy: really? >> yep. there was one other person who said, hey, you can't take photos here. >> jimmy: that was it? nobody recognized you as >> jimmy: so what did you prove with this? you weren't even wearing the glasses. maybe if you had the glasses -- >> even more my: yeah. >> he hides in plain sight. >> jimmy: that's superman for you. it as funny thing that we accepted that the glasses are okay. >> yeah. >> jimmy: as an the movie -- i don't
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i have seen the movie. and you are a good superman. >> thank you. >> jimmy: are you shooting the s now? >> we br to start, yes. >> jimmy: you're about to start the justice league movie. and that's where everybody gets together? >> pretty much,: superman has to be the leader of that group, is he? >> there's a -- pretty much an argument between him and batman. >> jimmy: they're always fighting, these two, can't let : i think there's sexual tension between the two two of them. >> yes, ben's a beautiful man. man. >> whoo! >> jimmy: wow, that would be the greatestughter ] [ cheers and applause ]ittle drink. angeles? >> first time in l.a. was for monte cristo."e you at that time? >> i was 18. 17, 18. >> jimmy: oh, wow.
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you came by yourself? >> i came with a couple of friends of mine.correctly, it was about a week before the premiere. my mom turned to me and said, oh, so when's the premiere? i haven't heard. the studio said, oh, next week. hold on a second, next week? who are we supposed to get they said, it's not in your contract to get tickets. so -- yeah. we're like, oh. we argued and then we got tickets. flew myself out there with : like this? or in the plane? >> oh, yeah, like this. still working on that one. yeah, then came out to l.a. >> jimmy: did you -- what did you got here? >> the thing which got me the most was that the drinking age is different. >> jimmy: yes. >> i mean, i was 18. in uk you can drink at what is the drinking age? >> 18 years old. >> jimmy: i didn't know if it was 17 --
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[ cheers and applause ]t have super hearing. i didn't know if it was younger than that or whatever. >> it's 18, yes. >> jimmy: and so -- yeah, youll of a sudden you're a child again. >> yeah. it felt very odd. walking into a bar and getting i.d.'d. like yeah. he's like, you can't come hy a lot of english stars turn to drugs when they come to our country. >> yes, that's exactly why. >> jimmy: what are you going to do? you can't wet get adrink? i'll go to the hotel and do a bunch of coke. >> jimmy: we are going to take a break. we'll see a clip from "batman vs. superman." henry cavill is here with us!lause ] st and values to warp. mr. tyler, your skittles portrait. that is e to the z oh twiddly dee-sgusting! d me sing diddly-ding yet. dream on! higher. i think a little higher!
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consider this mercy. >> you will. >> jimmy: that's henry cavill and ben affleck, "batman v. superman." it opens one week from penn know each other before this movie? >> we met once. >> jimmy: met once in an official meeting? >> not actual -- a at the oscars one year. which i wasn't going to but they make you go to the parties anyway. >> jimmy: at that time you knew he would be playing batman opposite you? >> i did: no? >> just met him, nice guy, normal, down to effort guy. >> jimmy: did you have any of that kind of actor thing where you can't talk to each other on the set because you'reslike each other? >> no, i just didn't like him. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: it was genuine? >> just genuine dislike. >> jimmy: does it happen? >> then you become lovers and make videos. >> jimmy: it's like sam and diane in a way.
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>> jimmy: so --ing i would love to try with you. a lot of people are drunk right now. watching television. and the show is on in bars. you can't really hear on in the bar. >> right. >> jimmy: so if you would double me, what i would like you to do is punch me in slow motion. i'm going to go flying back that way.n slow motion? >> jimmy: yes, it has to be in slow motion. >> okay. >> jimmy: please do not actually hit me. punch me in slow motion. i'm going to slide hen maybe guillermo, you come over and you punch henry. to punish him because you're my securityay. >> jimmy: okay? >> guillermo: whatever you may. >> jimmy: then that way, we'll play it back in fast motion and you punched me and we'll hopefully freak everybody out. >> okay. >> jimmy: all right? so you go ahead and maybe we'll look like we got in an argument, i'll be pointing at you
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and this and this and this. [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: okay, good, all right. now let's play it back and see how it looks. we'll play it at super speed. that was very good, guillermo. >> guillermo: thanks, jimmy. >> jimmy: look, our whole thing is smashed. here we go. [ cheers and applause ]"batman v. superman: dawn of justice" one week from tomorrow.
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flogging molly.arned an oscar nomination for her very first movie role and now stars on one of the most popular shows on tv. " empire" returns to fox on march 30th. please say hello to gabourey sidibe.nd applause ] >> i'm good, hi. >> jimmy: how are you? >> i'm good. >> jimmy: i haven't seen you in a long time. >> i've been busy. >> jimmy: was the last time i saw you at my wedding? you? >> jimmy: yes, yes, yes. >> yes. >> jimmy: this is something that we haven't discussed publicly. >> it's maybe it's a better story for you to tell. this is something i had no idea what was going on.
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to sound crazy, but i --impressed with you for -- we did a thing where we had a character named black hitler. >> oh. >> jimmy: on the show.y favorite role to date. >> jimmy: that's how everyone reacted. >> hitler. >> jimmy: we asked all these famous actors to play black hitler and everyone was tooere like, that's funny but i'm not playing black hitler. then i thought, does black hill letter have to be a man? we asked you and you said? the thing is i'm really brave. and i just am like the best person ever. >> jimmy: you reall welcome. >> jimmy: thank you, because -- >> i thought it was really funny. who said no? >> jimmy: everyone said no. imagine every black man in hollywood, and he said denzel? >> jimmy: we didn't both tore ask denzel. >> that was probably right, yeah. >> jimmy: maybe he would have
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with this in mind, you -- we became friendly and exchanged ime. >> we're friends. >> jimmy: and you and my wife -- tell the story. >> okay, so i get a call from jimmy's then-fiancee like, this is super secret, don't tell anyone, we're getting married here, we're getting married there, at this time, and i think it would be funny if you walked down the aisle before me. and i made him no pranks, no pranks, no pranks so he's not going to expect this. and i want everyone to relax. and i heard that you were afraido cry at your own wedding? >> jimmy: yeah, i was. >> what kind of psychopath are you that you are afraid to have an emotion? at your wedding? >> jimmy: it is me. i find it embarrassing. >> okay. >> jimmy: yes. i respect that. you know. >> jimmy: the idea is "here comes the instead of molly you would show up. >> in a full wedding gown. >> jimmy: which i happen to have
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which looked great by the way. there is gabbyrs and applause ] >> i am a beautiful bride,ld marry me, right? >> jimmy: i already did. already you're cheating on me, this is embarrassing. >> it's an open : so this was a secret. like nobody in molly's family knew. >> no one knew. so like i get there. and like i have a friend come with me. she has noing either. and they get me in the wedding dress, it's right before the wedding, put me in an suv, sneak up to -- molly and her family were in a bun de low >> jimmy: changing in a bungalow, yeah. >> so i get there. i get out of the car. i'm knocking on the window of the door. because it's locked. her family's like, go out of here! like they don't even know. they don't know. they think i'm just some jerk at the wrong door.
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maybe you don't know?s you and he goes to molly and he says, it's going to be okay. but apparently they double-booked the wedding.ride here. we're going to make it work. and molly said, no, no, that's just -- that's beautiful. i was banging onget her attention. her, her! so finally i get let in and i have to go down the aisle and nobody really understands what's happening. a u-shaped aisle or something. >> jimmy: i have a photograph of this. the music starts to play. >> here i come. >> jimmy: here comes f our guests knew you were doing this. they're like, this is gabourey sidibe? >> you should like -- their faces going from panic to someone was going to jump me. i was so afraid. somebody was going to tackle me. not molly's day! but like i made ould go from panic to
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this is hilarious. >> jimmy: so then you got up to the front. you said a fews crying but i was crying from laughing so good. >> which is good, you had an emotion, you lived. >> jimmy: i finally had an emotion. and it really was ament. i have to say thank you for doing that. then you were really like definitely -- you were if not the mvp, right up there, mvp you had everybody going the whole night. >> like they were playing the jams and stuff. i like a party. >> jimmy: did you have fun at the wedding? >> i did, i got to see your really goofydance. >> jimmy: that's a secret, that's a secret that i keep. >> is it? it's no secret between us, we're married. >> jimmy: not anymore, yeah. >> baby, it's yeah, that is a dance -- i made up a dance to the new edition song "cool it now." everybody does it at all of our family functions.
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>> jimmy: it goes like this -- stop you're going to lose i know the dance. they played it three times at your wedding over and over again. >> jimmy: it's very long, it just seems like they played it three times in a row.or doing that. by the way, congratulations on "empire." it's not just a hit, it's like a cultural phenomenon now. >> apparently, they tell me so, jimmy: do you have a sense of that? do people talk about it all the time? >> all day long. all day long. and it's like a really fun show to be on. so it's cool. but like people -- we did notbe as big as it is. >> nobody knew anything would be as big as it is. >> apparently people name their babies cookie now. that's a thing. >> jimmy: i know a guy, he'srs old. he has a whole bunch of cookie jars in his apartment. [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ]ection of
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in fact, i even drew a picture of him during the commercial break. he's the new cookie monster. yeah, , you'll get to know all of my family and friends, good, good. >> jimmy: as our relationship continues. well, it's great to see you. thank you so much. >> thank you for having more ray sidibe. " empire" returns march 30th at 9pm to fox. be right become with flogging molly!] >> dicky: the "jimmy kimmel live" concert series is presented by samsung. and at progressive, we let you compare our progdeals for reals! ...and our competitors' rates side-by-side, so you know you're getting a great deal. saving the moolah. [ chuckles ] as you can see, sometimes progressive isn't the lowest. not always the lowest!you doing? -i'm being your hype man. not right now.
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immy kimmel live" concert series is presented by samsung. >> jimmy: i want to thank henry cavill, gabby sidibe, dj khaled, and apologize to here with the song " john l. sullivan" flogging nd applause ] i am the man with the plan of john l. sullivan a fighter ' til the end legend he will be and if any man should ask i'm the man with the plan to shake the hand
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you may be tough but you'll never knock him down god but not our sacred cow ght but never on the ropes he is a diamond cut for every poor man's hope he was always ya he's the champion of the people the first and last name ever to be spoke now i'm the man with the plan to shake the hand of john l. sullivan a fighter ' til the end a legend he will beask if any man could carry i'm the man with the plan
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he hand of glove and nothing more shall be he is the struggle in this thing for all to see he's alwayset ya he's the champion of the people the first and last name ever to be spoke now i'm the man with the plan of john l. sullivan a fighter ' til the end a legend he will be and if any man should ask if any man could carry i'm the man with the plan to shake the hand of john l. sullivan
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come gather yourself it's the one thing that money can't buy but remember the loss to the loved ones so pass the glass over sullivan just ordered the glory days and let's live the good life until the last goodbye oh oooh oh oooh be tough but you'll never knock him down he is a towering god but not our sacred cow glad to meet ya
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of the people the first and last name ever to be spoke now i'm the man with the plan to shake the hand a fighter ' til the end a legend he will be and if any man should ask if any man could carry i'm the man with the plan to shake the hand now i'm the man with the plan to shake the hand of john l. sullivan a fighter ' til the end legend he will be and if any man should askname now i'm the man with the plan
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this is "nightline." >> tonight, why this video of hulk hogan rided a wrecking ball, doing his measures as played in a court of law today. the sensational case of the wrestler versus gawker. will he win his wsuit against the website for posting his sex tape? plus welcome to mariah's world. why the diva hase's invite ing cameras on her upcoming tour. what makes her show different from celebrity reality shows of years past. and stiletto
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