okay, look. first you take your bottle, and you spray it. then you get down on it like you really want it, and you got to make your body become a buffer. you start buffing that thing and making your body -- look how i'm buffitizing. you see that thing and get that body buffing in there like that, and that's right. and you got to make it go fast, and then you turn it off like that. that's how you do. you got it? >> don't hate, mr. b., all right? we have different styles. besides, you're not my boss. >> well, he could be. you know delgado got fired. >> shut up! what?! >> what?! >> what?! >> what? >> yep. so the position of sanitation superintendent is open. >> shut up. so they hiring? >> mm-hmm. and anybody can apply. >> that job is good as mine. i'm gone. >> uh-uh. not so fast, old man. i'm good, and i'm quick. >> you don't want to mess with me when it comes to janitorializing. boy, i'll smoke you like a thanksgiving turkey. you don't want to do it. >> oh, bring it on. [ showdown music plays ]

may the best janitor win. >> that's what i thought. you ain't ready to clean with me. uh, by the way, how did delgado get fired? >> i reported him for sleeping on the job. somebody, turn the lights off. >> social committee? >> yeah. hey. a few of us teachers after the meeting got together and said we should have a little mixer, you know? >> oh, i like to mix it up. >> you know, we need somebody to organize it. >> give me the pen. >> all right. >> i love a little after-school activity. >> we could use that. thank you so much. >> you're welcome. you know what, cora? i got to admit, first time i saw you walking around these halls, i thought you were, uh, stuck-up. >> who, me? no! i'm a lot of fun. >> you know what? maybe you and reggie could double-date with me and one of

my lady friends. >> sure! that would be great. you know, i love going to church and movies and museums. and me and reggie love plays. >> yeah, i heard you like to play. >> excuse me? what? >> reggie told me that, uh, sometimes y'all... [ whispers indistinctly ] >> come again? >> and maybe y'all might even... [ whispers indistinctly ] >> he said what?! >> heh heh heh heh! >> "heh heh heh!" no, he didn't! darnell, you've been misinformed! >> i'm sorry, cora. did i embarrass you? >> embarrass me? no. when my slip fell during my solo on first sunday, that was embarrassing! this is mad! >> cora, me and reggie was just talking noise. you know how guys are. >> yes, i know how guys are! but what's that have to do with reggie?! >> okay, cora, calm down. >> calm down? i'm calming up! >> listen, it ain't like none of us is virgins, right? heh heh heh! huh? wait a minute. you mean to tell me reggie is a virgin? heh heh heh! the coach ain't never scored? >> what up, darnell? >> not you, player.

>> reggie, i need to talk to you. >> oh, yeah. i need to talk to you, too. did you know that they changed today from sloppy joe day to taco day? and i had my mouth all ready -- >> did you tell darnell that we were -- you know? >> what? >> did you tell darnell that we've been having sex? >> oh. oh, that. uh, look here, uh, you see -- heh -- what had happened was -- heh heh heh -- >> it ain't nothing funny. ain't nothing funny. you said it, didn't you? you did! you said that! >> no, cora, see -- mnh-mnh. we was just talking, and he assumed that and -- and -- >> what did you say? >> nothing. >> nothing?! you should have said something! you know me and you ain't never had no sex! >> oh! >> and we're not going to have no sex until we get married! that's what you should have told him! >> hey, hey, look, cora, i don't know why you're making this such a big deal! >> i'm making it a big deal because you let darnell think that we were -- just so you could look cool! no matter how it made me look! >> whoa! it makes you look cool, too.

i mean, you get all this magnificence right here. and what do you care what darnell thinks for anyway? i mean -- heh -- as long as we know the truth. >> well, it's important to me, and i would think it's important to you, too. get out of my way. >> god! what are you, benching in here? get whatever you want, baby. let's just share a 20 piece. [ internal ] 20 mcnuggets, for only $4.99? she's beautiful, smart and sensible. [ male announcer ] mcdonald's crispy, juicy chicken mcnuggets. there's always more to love at mcdonald's. ♪

there's always more to love at mcdonald's. wherever your sutwist the ride... with twizzlers. the twist you can't resist.

with new quality ingredients. like angus beef, hickory ham, and our new buttery seasoned crusts. then...we add hot. because hot makes everything better. [ female announcer ] better taste. better quality. [ ding! ] ♪ hot pockets! [ motor whirring ] >> hey!

short-timer, get your own section! i'm buffing this side! >> no, i already got this section. >> this was my section before you got here, so go buff the other end of the aisle. >> i already buffed that end. >> hey, no arguing! hey, hey! buff daddy and lay-z, relax. >> i'm buff daddy. >> i'm lay-z, and you can't -- wait a minute. how you get finished that fast? >> i came in early, emptied the windows, and i replaced the vacuum cleaner bag -- twice. >> mm. >> i'm buffing here. i've been buffing here, and i'm gonna continue to buff here, so why don't you get the buff out of here? >> i already buffed this. >> you ain't buffed nothing. >> hey, guys! can't you two just work this out like two grown men? >> that man wears footsy pajamas! >> and i wear them well. you know what? i tell you what we're gonna do. we're gonna go back-to-back, and we're gonna face each other. then we're gonna take three "pesos" that way, and the one that get back to the spot first get to buff. >> fine. >> this is just like at my family reunion, except without the guns.

>> 1... 2... 3! [ motor whirring ] >> finished. >> you cheated! >> no! i buffed! [ whirring stops ] look, i want this superintendent job, okay? and i'm putting my best buff forward. >> well, i'll just clean the table then. >> i did it. >> well, i'll clean the chairs. >> i did it. >> i-i bet you didn't even do the magazines. did you do the magazines? i bet you didn't do -- did you do this? i bet you ain't done none of the magazines, did you? did you do any of the magazines? i bet you ain't clean no magazines, did you? >> brown, look, if you still want to do something, you could always wash my car. >> i'm surprised derek ain't already did it for you. >> actually, i did. >> oh. oh. ♪ wa-wa-wa-wa >> i hope you choke on a trash bag. >> so, i hear you're a shoo-in for the job. >> really? >> yep. i heard it in personnel. oh, brown's gonna be crushed.

ooh, you should let me tell him. can i tell him? >> something wrong with you. >> hey, um, boo boo, so you really washed my car? >> get real, renee. [ school bell rings ] >> i had a student say, "miss simmons, you can't fail me 'cause of no child left behind." i said, "if you don't get out of my face, you won't have no behind left, child." [ laughter ] >> cora! >> and something else -- >> can i speak to you for a minute in private? >> well, why can't it wait till later? >> oh, we can't wait! >> well, what's so important it couldn't wait? >> how could you do this?! >> do what? >> hey, reggie, how's the weather over there in virginia? [ laughter ] >> everybody out! >> okay. we'll be in the virgin islands if you need us. >> get out! >> okay, brother, calm down. have it your way, all right? oh, wait. you ain't never had it no way. i forgot. [ laughs ] bye-bye. come on, girl. how you doing? let me holler at you. backup plan. >> what is wrong with you?!

>> so, you happy now?! >> what are you talking about? >> you told darnell that i was a -- virgin! >> i did not tell darnell that you were a -- >> shh! >> virgin! >> so, just tell everybody now! >> what? i didn't say that to him. >> then why would he say it? >> well, maybe during our conversation, he just assumed it, and i didn't say different. >> because? >> because i wanted you to see how it felt for somebody to say things about you that weren't true! >> but there's a difference! >> well, how is this different? >> because it's about me. >> well, why are you getting so upset? so what if he thinks you're a virgin? it's not like it's true. >> [ whimpers ] >> oh. it's true? >> well, just broadcast it to everybody! >> oh, reggie, that is so sweet. >> well, then what the hell are you laughing for? >> well, hold up now. i'm not laughing. i'm just -- i think that's something to be proud of. >> no, no, not when you've been trying for all these years. i'm a failure. >> a man's virtue is just as precious as a woman's.

>> no, it's not. >> it is. you made a choice, and you stuck with it. >> no, i didn't. i never got chosen. >> i chose you, and i want you to honor what i chose for myself. > but -- i mean, cora, you're a widow. so you already did the she-bop-a-doo-bang-bang! >> yes, but until i marry again, i'll be celibate. >> i don't know how you do it. >> i don't do it. i get by with the good book and a good peach cobbler. and i'm not ashamed, and you shouldn't be ashamed, either. >> i'm sorry, cora. i'm not ashamed. >> really? >> well, maybe a little. [ both chuckle ] >> i'm sorry, too, but maybe darnell didn't tell everybody. >> maybe. >> i'm sorry. >> [ sniffs ] ooh. that smells -- get that one here. ooh.

miss hairston, come here. come here, come here, come here. [ sniffs ] yeah, you smell like old perfume and gout. you smell like pout. here. put some of this on. get it all. don't fight. come on. >> girl, what you got up -- what the -- uh, renee? >> yep? >> look. you see something on my shirt? >> uh, yeah. breakfast. >> no, not that. i'm talking about the shiny part. you see it? >> "superintendent." >> yes. >> where'd you steal that from? >> ain't nobody steal nothing. they gave me this when i got the job. >> you got the job instead of derek? >> mm-hmm. >> did you kill derek? >> ain't nobody kill no -- >> i'm right here! >> oh. >> good morning, mr. brown. >> hey, hey, hey, derek. i bet you won't say i ain't the boss of you now. bam. look at that. >> you ain't the boss of me. >> you a liar. i am the sanitation superintendent, a.k.a. the man in charge, a.k.a. big daddy,

a.k.a. the big buffer. watch me buff it, baby. bubba dubba dooza... >> congratulations, mr. b. >> unh-unh. don't try to butter me up now, trying to get all up in my face. get to work. i'm the supervisor around here. i'm about to go back here and do what supervisors do -- nothing. hmm! i'm the supervisor around here. >> i can't believe they gave brown the job over you. >> look, i told them not to consider me for the position because, you know, i'm in school and the hours are too demanding. >> ohh! you ain't fooling me. you got a heart. you gave up that job, didn't you? oh, you're so good! >> yeah. >> "yeah." ooh, you're such a punk! ohh! come on, man up! act like you got some tattoos, some bullet wounds on your neck. a little teardrop under your eye. don't be so soft. >> woman, i'm gonna graduate. do you even know what that is?

see, i'm gonna go on to bigger and better things. this is all that mr. b. has. >> all right. you're gonna miss out on free jello, rubber gloves. yeah. i likes to entertain. >> look, ultimately, i think i did the right thing. >> hey, everybody walk to the side of me! walk to the side of me! i'm the supervisor. go around me. go around me. hey! get back to work! get to work! get on your knees and work! i want you working harder than a 3-legged cat in a dog fight. hurry up! i'she just shopped at giant. she's got a receipt. we're gonna shop for the same items and see the difference.

let's shop! kids get the after- school munchies? absolutely. even with your bonus card, you saved over a buck here at walmart. yes! here at walmart you save over $2 on capri suns. wow! that's amazing. here at walmart you saved over $1.20 on cereal. that's good stuff! o.k. big moment. same items at walmart... $91.56. that's a savings of over $15 or 14%! yes! bring your last grocery receipt to walmart and compare prices. you'll see for yourself.

dadgood evening.ged. (giggle) i am the glow-bot. i will charge you... extra charge for you! extra charge for you! hit the lights queen of darkness. wowwwww! nighttime glow-in-the-dark pull-ups pants with new designs! they're as absorbent as the leading diaper! good night! glow bright! we love you! just charge'em up and hit the lights! ♪ i'm a big kid now... ♪ ♪ at night!

>> whew. heh! okay. i just want to set the record straight. i did not have relations with that woman. i never slept with cora. and the second thing i want to say is, i'm a virgin and i'm proud of it. >> what up, man? >> oh. >> you told me you wanted to tell me something? >> yeah. i wanted to clear the air. >> all right, shoot. >> magic was a better passer than kobe will ever be. heh! >> really. and you know what? we can go to l.a. and watch him play. yeah. we can fly on virgin airlines. heh! we can listen to madonna. i think she's with virgin records. and what is this made out of, virgin wool? what is that? [ laughs ] you know, you are pitiful.