this and give you an update. two families in grieving tonight after deadly lightning strikes in gary. one bolt sparked a house fire killing a man and leaving a baby severely burned. another killed a worker on high up on a billboard. wgn's randi belisomo is at comer children's hospital where the baby is being treated. two men are dead and one baby is in critical condition as a result of two bolts of lightning in gary indiana. two families are changed forever. these toddlers will grow up without their father. that is a reality they have yet to realize and the mother had not yet processed. she was widowed this afternoon. her husband a 28 year-old man was struck by lightning while on the job. i don't have clear answers because i do not have clearances from the company. paramedics were not able to tell me what happened. the man was putting up a

billboard on west 27th avenue in garry when a storm came through. am shocked that they allowed him to work during a thunderstorm and i am disappointed. i had heard and deeply hurt that i will not see my son and i will not see my son see his children grow up. the county coroner says the man sustained multiple burns. the family is not sure what is next. the family had decided the wife would stay on to raise the children but they do not know what now. i pray for him every day because it is a dangerous job going up their high. across town lightning struck a house killing a man. neighbors knew him as jacki. they were doing cpr on him to try to bring them back but it did not work. those who know him now it was his mother's house and he was staying home with this nine month old foster

child. that child was taken to the hospital after the house caught on fire. we heard a big noise and i covered my ears and turned off the television. we are waiting for an update on the baby's condition and we will let you know when we know more. live at the university of chicago hospital, back to you. family members of a worker who died when heavy rain water rushed into a sewer where he was working say he always feared for his safety on the job. 25-year old gustavo briceno died in the sewer line last night in the avondale neighborhood. his body was found two hours later carried about a block away. the kenny construction employee removed his harness to reach a confined space when the rushing water pushed his body through the line. a co-worker with him was strapped into his harness and pulled to safety. he was a very hard-working man.

a very good person and good father, a good husband. osha, the occuaptional safety and health administration, is investigating the fatal accident and could have its findings ready in several months. briceno of west suburban glendale heights leaves behind his wife and three young children. a man wanted on three counts of murder in georgia may be headed to chicago, as he lived here years ago, and his mother still resides in one of the suburbs. wgn's frank holland spoke exclusively with the suspect's mother tonight and joins us with her plea to her son. good evening. police describe thi police describe the crime as a good samaritan act gone horribly wrong. they say this robert bell a chicago native gunned down four people he shared a home with for no apparent reason. but his mother tells me he's a innocent man and that police have the story horribly wrong. horrific crime scene in atlanta as a 34 year-old mother and others shot and killed. according to police by 33 year- old robert bell and then they

welcomed into the home. my son did not do this. he looked it looked bad, it does. it looks real bad. but i do not believe that my son did this. i am not going to believe it. the mother of robert bell is holding out hope that there is more to this story. he knows that i know he is innocent. he knows. he knows that i love him. angelina benton let him stay in the house out of kindness. police say in addition to chicago, bell could be headed to albany georgia or tennesse where his wife works. here in the newsroom frank and praying for the family that lost their pop one. bell is on the run and police think that he may be on the run in chicago

where he graduated from high school in 1997. it has been torture for me. the mother is praying that the manhunt for the killer will end with her son safe and able to tell his story. he needs to turn himself in. bell's mother has reached out to new beginnings church and hopes that her son will come to that church and in sure that he will turn himself again. he could be headed to albany torture or tennessee where his wife works. a career criminal is released by mistake. tonight cook county sheriff tom dart is speaking out, saying his guys weren't at fault. 25-year-old jerimah harris was in a cook county

courtroom facing a murder charge while serving a lengthy sentence for armed robbery in statesville. he was found not guilty of murder, and was supposed to be sent back to stateville to finish his sentence. instead he was released. cook county sheriff tom dart says that sloppy paperwork caused the problem. the department of corrections had no reference on the front page to the fact that he had time to serve and it talked about a probation case pyrrhic buried in a stack of 30 documents, police documents, not documents that we use, there was a band up piece of paper that referenced something about a sentence. there was nothing. but late tonight, the illinois department of corrections released this statment contracticting the sheriff's department: "(idoc) followed all procedures in informing the cook county sheriff's department that ...jeremiah harris...was to be returned to idoc custody. that return was clearly instructed to be at the conclusion of harris' legal proceedings, upon order of the court." harris was captured in carpentersville, without incident, and returned to statesville. chicago's crime numbers making headlines, but sometimes it depends on how you read the statistics. by one standard, this city is the murder capital

of the u.s. with 506 homicides last year. but by the murder rate, or killings per capita, a dozen other cities are deadlier. fbi figures show detroit has the highest murder rate. some of the other large cities with more murders by population than chicago, are new orleans, saint louis, baltimore, philadelphia, cleveland and atlanta. comments that could signal change in the catholic church. pope francis takes on some hot- button issues in his first in- depth interview. plus, why a special prosecutor is closing the books on a death investigation involving former mayor richard daley's nephew. and a tough message for a local pitchman just before a judge set him free.

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then real people were asked to stay for a long weekend. would they smell anything? the room itself was like [sniffs] ahhh. feels like someone has pumped fresh oxygen into the room. [ male announcer ] on the last day we revealed everything. [ both ] oouugghhh. we were sitting right on it. febreze is stunningly effective. [ laughing ] [ male announcer ] pluggable febreze eliminates odors and keeps your home continuously fresh for up to 30 days, so you can breathe happy. a common face in tv infomercials is released from jail in chicago today but with a tough warning from a judge. wgn's marcella raymond has details on kevin trudeau's hearing. judge robert cattlemen put kevin trudeau on a short leash saying he has one week to tell federal regulators where his money is or he will be back in jail for six months. he did not appear to have a care in the world when he

left jail earlier this evening. no comment. the case is still pending. he spent the night at the metropolitan correction center sent there by the judge to push him to cooperate with federal regulators after they found he spent thousands of dollars on hair cuts, alcohol, and groceries from a bank account he had not disclosed. he owes $38 million in fines for fraudulent infomercials' about a weight- loss book he wrote. he has only paid about 50,000. he was dressed in an orange jumpsuit and he told the judge that he has no money and no home. there is not $38 million hidden somewhere, there is not 10 million, there is not even 1 million. but in a 3 hour interview last night at mcc federal regulators said they are doubtful about his memory

about significant events like when his wife asked for gold bars but he claims to not know what she did with them. the judge said there is great suspicion bought a lot of this money is available to you, meaning that he could pay the fine. the judge let the man out of jail under condition that he fully cooperate saying that if the receiver is not satisfied with your answers you may end up wearing the same color you are wearing right now. kevin trudeau has like to the court before saying he did not have hidden money yet federal regulators found the australian bank account with $140,000. he also has a number of companies in the caribbean and in europe and one of them paid him nearly $3 million. the chicago police department and the cook county state's attorney's office won't face charges for the way they investigated david koschman's death. special prosecutor dan

webb, seen here on the right, announced today a grand jury is done looking at both offices. the grand jury determined the time frame to bring counts is expired. it also found there isn't enough evidence to go after the police department for any possible wrongdoing in 2011. but richard vanecko remains charged with involuntary manslaughter. he's the nephew of former mayor daley. vanecko's accused of fatally punching koschman in the spring of 2004 in the rush street night life district. here are the lawyers who represent koschman's mother. he reads between the lines in this report and what seems very clear to us is that the special prosecutor in effect is saying that in 2004 there was criminal misconduct. webbs 162 page report will remain sealed until vanecko's trial is over. a trial date isn't yet set. parking at ohare is going high tech. the city is shelling out 14 million dollars for a system wide upgrade. the upgrade is

supposed to eliminate that tedious driving around in circles, looking for a parking spot. the new system will allow motorists to go on line and pay for their parking ahead of time, print a pass, and just scan it and go to their spot. that and other upgrades are planned. no word on when the new system will be up and running, but it is expected to be soon. pope francis on gay people, abortion, and the role of women in the church. where he went that no pope has ever gone. plus the slow and painful process of returning to normal after the mass shooting at the navy yard in washignton. you know throughout history, folks have suffered from frequent heartburn. but getting heartburn and then treating day after day is a thing of the past.

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pope francis says the catholic church is becoming obsessed with preaching about abortion, contraception, and same sex marriage. that comment and more are detailed in a sit down interview with a popular italian journal. pope francis also suggested that the church doesn't give women enough credit. i have said that i repeat the madonna maria was more important than the apostles bishops beacons and priests. women are more important that bishops and priests. each pope is guided by the holy spirit and it is marvelous to see how we responded, humble man courageous man and he has a sense of freedom and he is not looking over his shoulder asking how am i doing. he is as free as can be at that comes from his deep life of prayer and i think that is fascinating. pope francis says the church should be a home for all where people can be happy, not a small chapel focused on strict

doctrine and limited agendas. we want to hear from you: do you agree the pope's moderate tone on controversial issues related to the church? text yes or no to 97999 or vote on line at wgntv.com/poll. we'll have results after tom skilling's 7-day forecast. the fbi chief says the washington navy yard gunman fired at random monday, killing 12 people. investigators say video shows aaron alexis carrying a bag into a bathroom and emerging with a shotgun. the remington 870 may have been disassembled in the bag. it took more than 30 minutes for police to hunt down and kill alexis. his guns had cryptic messages written on them reading, "better off this way" and "my elf weapon." e-l-f might stand for "extremely low frequency," a common abbreviation in military and tech circles. today, workers were allowed back into the building to collect their belongings. a seventh person is now confirmed dead after last week's torrential flooding in colorado. three people are presumed dead. officials say most of those unaccounted for are expected to be alive and well but have failed to check-in with authorities to let them

know. the mountains north of denver saw more than nine inches of rain a week ago today... leading to flash floods that turned picturesque canyons into funnels that deluged towns downstream. to date some 12- hundred people were airlifted out of the mountains. the largest bank in the u.s. has to pay an enormous fine for an embarrasing trading scandal. j-p morgan chase will fork over 920 million dollars as part of a settlement with four u.s. and british regulators. the bank will also publicly admit wrongdoing. this penalty is one of the highest ever paid by a bank. one of the traders at the center of the scandal is cooperating with prosecutors and hasn't been charged, while two others are facing counts for allegedly hiding the trading losses. a texas appeals court tossing out the convictions of former u.s. house majority leader tom delay. in 2010 a jury found the conservative republican guilty of money laundering and conspiracy. he'd been accused of illegally funneling 190-

thousand dollars to g-o-p legislative candidates. a three- judge panel says there was insufficent evidence. the d-a plans to appeal to the full appellate court. delay has remained free on bond during the appeals process and even appeared on dancing with the stars. skills you've got to see to believe. we'll introduce you to a local high school golfer who's legally blind. and we have a winner for that 400 million dollar powerball jackpot. find out where the winning ticket was sold.

someone hit the jackpot, the powerball jackpot, that is. one ticket was sold with all the winning numbers. they are 7, 10, 22 , 32 ,35, and the powerball number is 19. the ticket was purchased at a gas station in lexington, south carolina. we may never know who the lucky winner is. in south carolina, jackpot winners are allowed to remain anonymous. powerball jackpots have been getting bigger recently, in part because the ticket price doubled to two dollars in january, plus california joined the jackpot pool last april. giving new meaning to the term super-size, a fast food junkie just built the mc-everything. mike chapman ordered every sandwich they make at a mcdonalds in wauwatosa, wisconsin. he rang up 141-bucks including a diet coke to wash it all down. then he speared the burgers, mcfishes and mcmuffins onto bamboo skewers to build his mc-masterpiece, his

monument to the golden arches. why? it was on his bucket list and it's not a death-defying feat. i said, i want one of everything. i know this sounds weird but breakfast and lunch. their reaction was, why do you want to do this? because i can. wide deal climb mount everest? because i can. no, he didn't eat it all at one sitting. he figures he's got leftovers for the next week or so. another round of storms headed our way. jim ramsey is back to fill us in on when the nasty weather is expected to arrive.

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that break down dirt and lock it away. how did you get this floor so clean? ♪ steamboost, sir! [ female announcer ] new swiffer steamboost powered by bissell. not just clean, steamboost clean. mr. ramsey, we had a torrential night last night and you say something is headed away but not as severe. last not we started as a tiny cell in bloom county that came south and east and it was an isolated event but chicago was in the bull's-eye and we got all of that. it is a different situation tonight with an organized line of showers and thunderstorms headed our way and it ran afoul of sunset and it is

deteriorating, well all the way to doing that. but we expect rain showers tonight and maybe some thunder and there could be a brief downpour in some areas. time lapse camera showed the mornings clouds clearing out and it was a good afternoon around here. the high temperature was 84. plenty of hot air to the south and that fuelled the warm- up today and produced those storms both yesterday and this morning. here's the area of the country we're watching, cold air from canada and it looks like both saturday and sunday will have daytime high temperatures only in the '60s. right now it is a toasty 77 in chicago with winds from the south and the heat index is 79. temperatures across the area reflecting the fact that it is warm out there and in fact humid as well. mid

and upper '70's and even 80s and parts of the area. the winds are not strong at the moment coming from the south at about five and 14 mi. per hour feared here is the heat we are in and notice the cold air. this is saturday and saturday and sunday the cold spells into illinois and keep the temperature is chilly, autumnal. the hot air returns by the end of the next seven day stretch. radar and satellite shows the lawn of storms. as we zoom in we see some storms holding together and there's evidence of that in lake county and king county as they drift to the north and east but as we pull up we see that the organized storms are dissipating. much of the state of illinois has been taken out of the severe thunderstorm watch as the storms weekend. the most

powerful elements of the storm were down here in missouri and kansas. we had word of water rescues taking place near kansas city and downed trees in missouri and iowa. for chicago to not expect rain. here is the forecast. this evening look for most of cloudy skies and a storm possible, a small storm probably but breakdown pores and maybe thunder. lower temperatures between 67 and 70 degrees and that should be between one and 2:00 in the morning. tomorrow mostly cloudy and early storms and we could take that out now the main line is coming through. high temperature is between 73 and 77. pretty good friday night. upper 40's and '50's downtown. look at the daytime highs between 63 and 68 degrees. an interesting way to start the weekend but there is a blessing

with clear skies and no chance of rain. sunday looks good as well and we will look at that and the rest of the seven day forecast and a few minutes. still ahead... succeeding despite the odds. a legally blind golfer with unbelievable skills. and a new community center fighting hunger in lincoln square. susie is dying to meet you. oh, steer clear of kristen, she can't control herself around chocolate. she'll devour you. really? i'd be a terrible friend if i didn't warn you. gotta go! yeah, uh, thanks for introducing us. anything for a friend. ooh, strong grip! ow! ♪ so, wanna grab a bite somewhere? here's fine. oh no, oh no, ahhh! an arm wrestling match that mr. clean realized

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tonights cover story is one that began with an e-mail. a father wrote to us here at wgn to tell us about his son. we were so moved after reading about 17-year-old high school senior matt juskie, we thought youd like to know about him as well. a young man with an indominable spirit who, despite the odds, sees success in his future. my first memory is standing in my garage when i was about three years old swinging one of those little tiny clubs. actually my dad was a big golfer and a drop off on me. i would bring into the driving range. he would take an interest immediately in hitting golf balls. he graduated from eighth grade and that summer he came to me and said, that i would like to try out for the high school golf team. inside my head i

thought, this will be tough. even my parents had minor doubts because it is hard for any person to play golf. it is a difficult sport for people who are cited and for someone unable to see, his depth perception is not good and it relies on distances yardages and the green when he gets close to the green and i thought that would be difficult for him to overcome. we knew something was up at three months and he was in for regular visit and the doctor noticed something with his eyes and sentenced to a specialist. that is when they diagnosed him with a problem, the absence of than iras. there is no people to contract or dilate and so you can imagine in the outdoor sun it is actually painful at times.

of clothes pigeon is pretty good. he needs to within 6 in. when the paper is in front of him. he has an underdeveloped optic nerve and he has uncontrollable rapid eye movement. difficult and regular everyday activity but you can imagine in golf, i don't know how he does it. each day i was taken to the tryouts and i could not bear staying at the course. i worry too much. i struck down the center. the second day went by he and he made that cut and the third day i was in the parking lot waiting to pick him up. i went out into the parking lot acting dejectedly. i asked matt, are you ok? then i put the shirt out from behind his back and he said he made it. we were jumping up and down in the parking lot. i ended up holding him in my arms

and it was a good time unemotionally for us. is that has put in just as much time as mat. he is there with him and have the routine down to a science now. twisted a little bit. i started spotting p shots to see if i could follow the ball and i could. we got a guideline of what a spotter could do and could not do and that at a spotter at that first match. my dad will provide me with information see the street right here, just let that drop and back to the fairway. will tell him where i want to hit keep it low. you have a tree in front with a limb. i get over the ball and get assistance with a lining because it is differedifficult to see te yardage. 1432 the middle.

on every shot i will get the exact yardage. there is no fuel shot for me because my depth perception is so poor. one saw the green or the grain i am on my own. i will walk off the pot and walk through the line to fill the undulation in the green. there are some many kids that once they hit high school break away from highs, their parents. i think it is awesome that my dad and i can have a close relationship. a great bonding experience. he has taught the lessons since he was born and he continues. i don't see my decision as a handicap. it is a hurdle and every day i keep trying to jump over it as much as i can. what an inspiration. matt would like continue his golf career and possibly play in college. and he writes a monthly column for the illinois association for parents of children with visual impairments

with the hope to help others facing similar challenges. matt had to reach out to the ihsa to get permission to have a spotter on the course. the organization was very quick to respond, and now he carries this letter with him to meets, just in case opposing teams have any questions about his special circumstance. i think there is a special bond between them. he is an inspiration. you see that we let them tell the story. we did not put my voice on that. i think our producer and videographer for their help with that. and that is parenting. lending a helping hand. the new lincoln square friendship center opens for business. and later in sports... the bears expect to find out a lot about themselves as they get their first road test of the season sunday night in pittsburgh.

♪ need advice on how to juggle those big family meals? this kenmore elite dual temperature double oven, exclusively from sears, can help. so you never have to worry... ...about dropping a dish. impressive! and so is j.d. power ranking kenmore elite highest in customer satisfaction. come celebrate kenmore's 100th anniversary and save up to 30% off all kenmore appliances. this is celebrating big. this is sears. it's been a happy union. he does laundry, and i do the cleaning. there's only two of us... how much dirt can we manufacture? more than you think. very little. [ doorbell rings ] [ lee ] let's have a look, morty. it's a sweeper. what's this? what's that? well we'll find out. we'll find out. [ lee ] it goes under all the way to the back wall. i came in under the assumption that it was clean. i've been living in a fool's paradise!

oh boy... there you go... morty just summed it up. the next 44 years we'll be fine. icaused by acid reflux disease, relieving heartburn, relief is at hand. for many, nexium provides 24-hour heartburn relief and may be available for just $18 a month. there is risk of bone fracture and low magnesium levels. side effects may include headache, abdominal pain, and diarrhea. if you have persistent diarrhea, contact your doctor right away. other serious stomach conditions may exist. don't take nexium if you take clopidogrel. relief is at hand for just $18 a month. talk to your doctor about nexium. [knock] no one was at home, but on the kitchen table sat three insurance policies. the first had lots of coverage. the second, only a little. but the third was... just right! bear: hi! yeah, we love visitors. that's why we moved to a secluded house

in the middle of the wilderness. just the right coverage at just the right price. coverage checker from progressive. that's why there's new duracell quantum. only duracell quantum has a hi-density core. and that means more fuel, more power, more performance than the next leading brand. new duracell quantum. trusted everywhere. a helping hand is now available in a north side neighborhood where you don't automatically think people could use some help. and the help involves the basics -- food, shelter, and clothing. wgn's amy rutledge takes us to the new lincoln square friendship center on west lawrence.

welcome. our first day. the first full delivery are ride out the new lincoln center friendship center just before it began. it was two years ago when a group of clergy and the co- director aideed bush discovered this neighborhood had a stigma begin population on the verge of hunger. several facilities shut their doors and it's our record increases in be in need. , kurt conception that the north side is well-to-do and there are areas of great applets but outside of those there is a lot of need. it is not something that we talk about. she says about 5000 people in this neighborhood are in need, one in six adults and one in

four children, the result of hard times. a lot of people lost jobs and were downsized and are one medical emergency away from severe need. they look like our friends and neighbors and sometimes i think people try to hide that need. food is not the only service that will offer. clothes and household items and things for kids to use and explore and information on healthy eating and language and help out reach and the goal is to bind the community. she has lived here 40 years and she says the neighborhood population is getting older and it is up to this community and every community to make sure everyone around them is well cared for. all makes models and colors and languages and we are all there for neighbors and that's what makes sure, what it is.

and amy tells us twelve families were served today. and that totalled 51-people who needed a helping hand from the new lincoln square friendship center. the seven day forecast looks good through friday but there is a chance of a shower indy morning and we will take another look at the radar that indicates that we could perhaps see a tiny thunderstorm from time to time before the main event for rides which will be mostly rain. ahead of the rain in western illinois you see areas popup that represent tiny thunderstorms that might produce lightning from time to time over part of the area. generally it looks like this will not be a major weather event. precipitation will be less than impressive although rochelkle could get three-quarters of an inch.

slowly warming to the mid '80s by next thursday. we are not done with the warm air even though fall will be completely established by then and temperatures make their way back to the same territory we were in this afternoon. we get through these storms tomorrow very quietly. and a gala for the chicago football classic. it was held at the beautiful south shore country club located along the lakefront. the chicago football classic is a yearly event and features teams from historically black colleges. this year morehouse will take on central state at soldier field, on saturday. money from this and other events promote literacy and scholarships. coming up... the blackhawks get a chance to try out a few wrist shots at soldier field as they hype their march 1st game with the penguins. and the bears hope they don't revert to some old bad habits when they play in pittsburgh sunday night. dan roan is next with sports. it is the south shore cultural

center. that's what it is. russell simmons is here and stacy keebler and the music of desean. hang tight. we are about desean. hang tight. we are about to ♪

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as marc trestman pointed out monday, the bears could easily be 0-2 right now, which means their margin of error up to now has been very small. they can't afford dumb mistakes, and as rich king reports from halas hall, they haven't been making very many. rolling along at 2-0 not a single penalty and a complete turnaround from a year ago but both wins coming at home and the bears working out with crowd noise. will be much more difficult to avoid pre snap penalties. colby in ellis and solid count and people will been all over the place and defense and different places at different times that will get our attention focusing on the snap count. those are different ways to measure ourselves. and make their first appearance

on a national stage and it comes on the road. j. cutler says is it a key test to see with the bears stand now. first road game and the noise will be a problem for us offensively. to travel and young guys on the offense and a new system and just see how the communication goes with the noise and keeping our boys out there. it will be a good test for us. pittsburgh has a decent defense but the offense is awful, 31st in the nfl. only the jacksonville jaguars are worse. we won't see marian hossa on the ice until the hawks' last pre-season game, precautionary said joel quenneville as hossa deals with back issues. jonathan toews expected back tomorrow night in washington. soldier field is set to play host to the hawks this winter. they play pittsburgh in an outdoor game on march first, commissioner gary bettman and others along the lakefront to hype it up today. brent seabrook and duncan keith took turns firing 45-yard slapshot field goals. this will be the hawks second game back from the

olympic break, and they can't wait to play it. you know how cool it was outdoor at wrigley but detroit still to the day the coolest thing i have been at and it is an event you look forward to and you will never forget. it is in the memory banks and this will be at eight different level and everybody is looking forward to it. it is definitely on everybody's schedule and target date. playing out there for a long time all day long. i am excited and it makes you feel like you are a kid again. and tonight, the penguins and blackhawks in a preseason game. first period, pittsburgh gave it away and patrick sharp made the penguins pay, 1-0 there. then down 3-1 and shorthanded, the hawks get another one on a great steal and score from ben smith. it wound up in a shootout, and pittsburgh wins it, 4-3.

cubs and brewers in front of a sophisticated audience at miller park. last chance for the cubs to get one in this four-game series. and they did. third inning nate schierholtz fence- hunting, his 21st of the season scored anthony rizzo in front of him. cubs win, 5-1, seven string innings for jake arrieta. sox had the day off, they're at detroit tomorrow. henrik stenson has a one-shot lead in the tour championship, tiger's nine back after a 73. chicago native candace parker of the l-a sparks is the wnba mvp, the sky's elena delle donne and sylvia fowles finished third and fourth in the voting. quality baseball entertainment today. pirates catcher tony sanchez tracking a pop-up near the dugout, right into the dugout. notice first the great catch, and second how the padres really went out of their way to help him out. and then in detroit, prince fielder in pursuit of a pop-up, didn't get there, but he sampled somebody's nachos there in the front row. fielder said he thought about dipping into the guy's cheese, but was afraid the fan might be a double-dipper.

that is hilarious. well he is a vegetarian. that's the news for this thursday night. we're happy you shared time with us. i'm micah materre. i'm mark suppelsa. updates on wgntv.com for all of us here, have a good night. ♪ [ female announcer ] pop in a whole new kind of clean with tide pods. three chambers. three times the stain removal power. pop in. stand out.

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ator: kids, back in 2007,ealth it seemed like everyone belonged to these silly things called gyms. the idea was you'd pay them lots of money to run around and lift heavy things. biggest rip-off in the world. and yet people fell for it. including me. oh, forgot my wallet. it started with one of those moments when you realize you're not as in shape as you want to be. (panting): whoo... that's further than it looks. aw, coupon's on my dresser. that's too far. forget it. please don't judge me. i wound up shame-eating the whole pizza. i woke up all greasy and sweaty.

my sheets looked like what they wrap deli sandwiches in. maybe i should join a gym. do you go to a gym? well, i go to total rip fitness, but i don't work out there. what do you do? i invest. there goes one of my investments now. cheryl, hard work's paying off. keep up the good work. so your investments are women? yes. women who, how shall i put this delicately? they fat. so, i come here, give them lots of attention now. then when they get hot, who's the first guy they run to? the one who invested in them when they weren't. wow, i can't decide if i'm thoroughly disgusted or really, really impressed. of course, not all investments pay dividends. see the girl over there at the vending machine-- tonya. she is one kit kat away from junk bond status. hey, barney. becky, elliptical machine's really working for you. nice stuff.