good evening from los angeles. i'm tavis smiley. tonight, first a conversation with ron capps director of the veterans writing project about his memoir serious li not lrt fooy not all right five wars in 10 years which takes a look at how the trauma of war continues to plague our soldiers. a veteran of afghanistan. then we will talk to arturo sandoval, from north america and we're pleased he will join our studios and a performance from arturo sandoval coming up right now. ♪ ♪

♪ the california endow mement help happens in neighborhoods. learn more. >> and by contributions to your pbs station from viewers like you. thank you. ♪ ♪ >> the overwhelming majority of physical and emotional cost of war is this subject of ron capps new memoir, serious li not lrt fooy not all right five wars in 10 years

which takes readers on a personal reality of war crimes and the atrocities. he was a senior military officer and foreign service officer for the u.s. department of state and combat veteran of afghanistan having served in the army and army reserves for 25 years now the founder of the director of the veterans writing project. ron capps i'm pleased to have you on this program. >> thanks for having me. >> i want to start by reading something that i think will contextlize our conversation. these are your words. just as a glove protects a hand on hot iron writing allows me to hang onto the memory long enough to shape it. it allows me to distance myself from it. in a very real way i wrote my way into it. this book is my attempt to write my way out of it, to write my way home. >> that's a powerful phrase, to write my way home. can that be done? >> i'm trying. doing my best.

i was diagnosed about 12 years ago with post traumatic stress disorder. even after i was diagnosed i didn't do a very good job of taking care of myself and continued to deploy to different war zones until i was ready to take my own life in the desert. i was interrupted and figured that was second chance. writing is the road home for me to take care of all that drama in my life. >> what do you want to say? what are you attempting to say with your writing? >> well, the story, this book, it's really two stories, the story of how i ended up one day in darfur in 2006, ready to kill myself, that i had lost the thread, i lost all hope. there was nothing i felt i had done that was successful. i failed at everything, failed to save lives in the five wars i had gone to and i was ready to end my life. what writing did was give me the chance to come back! that's the second story and story of hope for any with post

traumatic stress disorder, there is a way home. >> when you were sacrificing in the way you were and others are, help me understand what leads to a feeling of failure. you're putting your life on the line for your country, for fellow citizens. some of these wars, in the minds of some americans are, you know, wars of -- i'll just say it expeditions in the minds of some of us -- >> uh-huh. >> yet there you are putting yourself on the front line. what happens to make you feel like a failure? >> in some of these plac places -- let me say that another way -- all of these places my job as intelligence officer was to go somewhere, some foreign country away from home, come to understand what was happening on the ground, understand the people, culture, grievances, why are they fighting and what do they want and what do they need and write about that a send that information home. in many of the places i worked

the implicit task was stop the fight, stop the killing, stop the rape, stop the burning of villages, stop the horrors. i was unable to do so. i was in kosovo for two years and in central africa off and 0 on for two years. i was in darfur two years there were $2.5 million and 2 million displaced, when i left there were 300,000 dead and i left feeling i did not take on that war. >> you're not human and divine, you're just human, how do you not own all of that or is that impossible? >> for me it was impossible for a long time. i could not separate the task from myself. i felt i had failed. over time, i have come to understand there's nothing i could have done that was different. there were some villages that maybe i could have fought harder to get into to protect the civilians there, to keep the

village from being burned, but the fear -- the knowledge really if i took a certain action i would lose my status, my ability to stay in that country and do the job, maybe my whole team would lose our status. when we were in kosovo, a woman tried to hand me her baby, said, take the child away so the serbs won't kill him. i couldn't take that child. if i did, i knew we would lose our status. i will never forget that. i will nerver forget the feelin each hopelessness and fecklessness of leaving those behind and i know someone did go back and move some out, the united nations. >> how do you write about -- you write about it powfully in the text. how do you navigate the process of having to honor the strict code you are under as an intelligence officer?

with the compelling and maybe even greater moral questions you face, like this woman and her chi child, about what to do, knowing you could in fact have done it in those moments even though it might have been a violation of what you -- the rules and regulations. does that make sense? >> it does make sense. the act of navigating it, how you do that is the challenge for any in that situation. in some cases i did things i might not -- should not have done. i know in a case particularly in darfur, i went outside the chain of command and i called washington directly to a friend of mine who worked in the office of the deputy secretary of state and i told her if we do not take action tonight, this village in darfur will go away and automatic those people will die. she helped me. she helped that village by urging action from washington to the african union and a platoon of nigerian peacekeepers went into that village the next day.

i like to think that by doing something a little bit wrong i corrected a greater wrong and that village exists today. what happens is by taking an action very much counter to one's prnl moral beliefs or not taking an action i think we're left with something called a moral injury. this inability to fix a problem having taken an action that goes against one's personal beliefs leaves a soul very much injured. there's research done at the v.a. hospital in boston on this very subject. reading their research helped me understand where i am with this, is helping me on my road home. >> this motion of moral injury strikes me as fascinating. you're talking about in one particular context. i think there are a great many fellow citizens who have never gone to war who suffer from moral injury of a different time another conversation for another

night. in the context you reference it, what is to be done about that moral injury that you and others suffer from? >> i think the first thing is people have to understand that this is an injury to the soul. we have to treat it as an injury. we also have to allow that person to forgive themselves. we have to allow that person to understand what they've done in a larger context. towards the end of the book, i talk about, could i have done more? maybe. could i have done this much more? no. i could not have stopped the war in darfur by myself. there is still a war in darfur. people are dying everyday out there. i could not have stopped the war in kosovo. i was a very junior officer at the time. i was driving dick holbrook around. it's his job to stop the war. it doesn't change how i feel i could have done more for a specific village or specific group of people. what i've had to do is reconcile those feelings with this larger context.

i'm trying to forgive myself for my failures. >> what are you learning about ptsd that you think the rest of your fellow citizens still don't get or need to be made aware of? >> i would say that a lot of people who come back from a traumatic experience are going to be just fine. the vast majority of us are. we might need some treatment, we might need medication, we might need talk therapy. for anybody who is hurting out there, i would say, look, there is a road home. don't be afraid to ask for help. we all need to get beyond the stigma of asking for health. mental health is nothing more than health care. if you broke your ankle, get a cast, go back to work in six weeks. if you come down with ptsd, people will shun you but don't be afraid to ask for help. we have to get beyond the idea there is a difference between mental health care and health care, all the same. caring for the mind and body and caring for the soul. >> i am pleased you are writing

your way back home. i'm pleased to have had you on this program. his name is ron capps. his memoir is called seriously not all right five wars in 10 years. ron, thanks for your service and most importantly, thanks for the text. >> a great pleasure. coming up, music legend, arturo sandoval. stay with us. >> imagine this, 1977 in cuba when two great trumpet players, dizzy gillespie and turo sandoval get together for a bit of improvisation, the rest is history, one presidential medal later, arturo sandoval is still recording and still touring. before we begin our conversation let's look at arturo performing co-written by dizzy. ♪ ♪

♪ ♪ >> i probably shouldn't confess this to you but i come see you as often as i can you know for two reasons. one because i just love you -- [ laughter ] >> but, two, i'm checking to see if there's any slippage in your sound. your horn is as big now, arturo. >> you know what. i'm very lucky, man.

i feel like a -- i still have a lot of energy, man, the desire to still play music and tour, the whole thing. >> do you hear -- i don't want to say slippage again. do you hear any difference in your sound at almost 65? >> i feel it's aç little bigge now. i guess lucky, i don't know. >> why do you play so big? >> i don't know. not necessarily, you know, i really -- i have a big passion for the instrument, but mainly for the reason of the sound, because the trumpet is one of the few instruments that really don't put any limitation in your expression. the trumpet give you the possibility to spread any kind of feeling in any kind of dynamic of volume of something. trumpet can trumpet can whisper, so -- ♪

♪ it's very difficult to play that even in the violin. the trumpet can go from zero to 60 in three seconds. you can expression any kind of feeling, you know, without a restriction. >> every time i see you, you're still as much on the move. you're here at the playboy jazz festival, you're everywhere. you're not tired of all the running yet? >> no, no. i have no choice. that's my passion. that's my life. music is the engine that move my soul. i'm happy when i'm working. i'm sorry. i shouldn't say that. i shouldn't say that. the word working, that's wrong. when i'm playing, when i'm writing, when i'm practicing, i'm happy. you know, you want to see me unhappy is when i don't have nothing to do. >> yeah. >> then my wife notice that and she tried to find something --

>> get you out of the house? >> to entertain me somehow because she know i get a little cranky when i don't have nothing to do. >> speaking of writing, you been scoring lately? >> yeah. you remember the first time i came here with you, we talk about, i just move to los angeles. >> from miami after all these years. >> at that point, i didn't any score yet but now i did a few, in the last three years, i've been doing a few. all of them beautiful projects but independent and low budget. it's okay. it's okay. that keep me entertained because i love that. >> you like the scoring? >> i love that. probably as much as i like to play. >> yeah. >> i love that. i love, oh, yeah, yeah, i enjoy that. and we have the producer and director, we see the movie and

start to play things. we start the cues and start to play immediately and don't stop until the director and producer and everybody smiles. when they smile, okay, next, then we move on. i wrote on the spot, you know, looking to the scenes. >> i was about to ask how business with playboy and everything else you are doing this summer, how busy you plan to be, you don't get much busier in the summer since you're moving all the time anyway. >> i don't really do like a tour. >> you're always on tour. >> exactly. that's the idea. i really don't like any more like long tours, i used to do for three months, i don't do that anymore, no, no. i got two beautiful granddaughters now. i want to be around them. what i do is three, four, five days a week max. and come back. and like this, all year long.

tomorrow, i'm playing in detroit. >> you're on the move. >> tomorrow morning. >> the last time i saw you, your project had just come out. i love that record. >> that record probably is the better received record i ever done. i have 43 records, but that one was the last year, the must play it jazz album in all jazz radio stations in the country. also, the record of every record i had ever done, got seven nominations. one of them was album of the year, which it was competing with all the pop stars. out of those seven, it won three grammys. i never got a record that won three grammys. >> uh-huh. >> then the other one i did afterwards won a grammy, too. the other one -- my last three

records -- >> all grammy winners. >> 8, 9 and 10. >> your love for jazz is so profound after all these years. yeah. still, man, because people ask me why you didn't do it before. i say, you know what, i didn't feel a necessity to do a specific title or album. everybody knows i play and everything i have been doing since i met him, it's him there somehow, you know. somehow. i am trying to preserve his style, his music, his legacy as much as i kcan. it's my daily tribute to him. it is not only because i remember him every day of my life. >> a daily tribute? >> exactly. exactly. >> there's only one d -- is there one you want to collaborate on?

>> i am open to collaboration, working all the time and doing things for people. i've been collaborating with hans zimmer. >> hans zimmer. >> in the last bunch of movies he's doing. did the pirates of the caribbean, lone ranger, nomination won the oscar and later on we did lone ranger. now, you go to the movie and watch the "spider-man 2," you going to hear my horn. you're growing to hear my horn from the beginning to the end. >> those are some serious collaborations. hans zimmer is one of the best. >> unbelievable. and farrell william, too. i never met farrell in person but i have so much love for him besides what i've been doing because what he's been doing with my youngest son, by the way, today is his 38th birthday.

>> he is collaborating? >> he is a partner in my son company. he do design of art installation, and they're in new york now, signing a new book. his company is friends with you. a wonderful company. >> speaking of books, didn't your wife just do a book with -- >> i -- i brought a copy for you, my friend. >> thank you. >> it is dedicated to you. i hope -- >> thank you. i appreciate that. my dear friend, touch viavis, r and admiration. >> it's like a testimony of all the friends -- personal connection that my wife was, you know, saving for so many years since we met. rob simon, which is a very dear friend of mine, write it

together with my wife. >> quincy jones. can't get much better than that. >> yeah, yeah. >> i can't wait to get into this. >> a lot of wonderful photos and moments and stories about the whole -- many different things happening in my life. >> i celebrate your artistic genius. >> i appreciate that. >> i celebrate your daily tribu tribute. i can't wait to get into that. >> this is album, this is something which is completely different than i've been doing. this is the tango album i did in argentina with the national symphony orchestra in argentina. >> will this help me learn the tango? >> absolutely. this is the latest latest one dedicated to the family, carl fuentes junior is my best friend. >> yeah. >> they celebrate two years ago

the 100 university of the brand, the best cigars in the world. >> message to future guests, if you show up with gifts, i'll like you more. speaking of gifts, the greatest gift arturo sandoval can ever give is to play his horn. i think i talked him into playing just a couple minutes, just a couple minutes of a song that i think will be appropriate for summertime. i'll just leave it at that. the latest text from the arturo sandoval family is called dizzy gillespie, the man who changed my life, from the memoirs of arturo sandoval. he's got all kinds of project. his project, if you haven't heard that, i highly recommend that along with his other stuff. can i talk you into playing a couple more minutes for something good for the summer?

>> you ready? >> i'm ready for you. i'm plugging my ears and i'm going to sit right here. ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪

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[ applause ] >> whoa! >> that's our show for tonight. thanks for watching. as always, keep the faith. >> for more information on today's show, visit tavis smiley at pbs.org. >> hi, i'm tavis smiley, join me next time about the multi nominated laureate next time. see you then.

>> rose: welcome to the program. we begin this evening with ron dermer. he was ambassador to the united s ]the murder of three israeli teenagers. >> hamas is a terror organization. sheaf fired thousands ofi5ícs rs at our cities. they have scores of suicide bombers to blew up our cafes an. members of hamas has perpetrated a heinous crime. they are a genocidal organization. they callu " for the murder of jewsworldw. the leader of hamasthe murders,d they called for more kidnapping so we know what hamas is b it hasn't changed and hamas needs to be confronted. >>