>> dicky: from hollywood, it's "jimmy kimmel live!" tonight -- shaquille o'neal. "twilight's" julia jones, and music from david guetta featuring usher. with cleto and the cletones. and now, sure enough, here's jimmy kimmel! ♪ it's "jimmy kimmel live"

[ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: hi. thanks, cleto. hi there, i'm jimmy, i'm the host of the show. thank you for coaching. thank you for watching. quick show of hands. how many people in our audience have had sexual relations with herman cain? everyone? in case you didn't hear, last night, another woman came forward with a story about herman cain. when you have more women accusing you of sexual misconduct than you have on your pizza, your campaign might be in trouble. a woman named ginger white claims she had a 13-year long extramarital affair with herman cain. a claim that mr. cain has denied. and cain is starting to remind me of a black tiger woods, you snow? but -- [ applause ]

it's -- this woman sat down for an interview with a local fox news affiliate in atlanta yesterday and to tell her story and to give us a description about the man behind the candidate. >> he's very much the same. very much confident, very much sure of himself, very arrogant in a playful, sometimes, way. very -- herman cain loves herman cain. >> jimmy: maybe if he spent more time loving herman cain instead of loving everyone else, he wouldn't be in this mess. [ applause ] but even though cain claims they were just friends, there is evidence that might suggest otherwise, including the way he signed his own book. >> when his new book "ceo of self" came out in 2001, ginger white says cain once again

autographed it for her, writing, "friends are forever," everything else is a bonus. >> jimmy: everything else is bonus. he claims the reason he had her number and called and texted with her 61 times was because he was trying to help her financially. interesting. i thought he was against welfare and handouts? when this new allegation came to light yesterday, cain said it wouldn't affect his decision to run for president but this morning his chief of staff said he's considering dropping out of the race. the good news is, it will have no affect on his chance of winning the presidency. i think, overall, i think the lesson is, if you want to know if your husband is cheating or not, have him run for president and you will find out. [ applause ] but i hope he stays in. i hope he sticks it out. i would love to have a president with 15 first ladies. it would be --

[ laughter ] if nothing else, make a great vh1 reality show. it does seem like he's staying in. he made a speech on foreign policy tonight in michigan and they just put out a new ad that hopefully will convince his supporters that he hasn't done anything improper. >> i'm herman cain. and yes, i enjoy the ladies. but i only make love to them in my brain. see, right there? that's me having sex with my secretary. in my brain. here am i kissing my wife. but i'm also having a threesome with some ladies i recently met at a continental breakfast buffet. in my brain. you stay out of this, cow! and remember that mistake i made about libya? twirling around in my head. at that time, i was also in a jacuzzi stub with the spice girls. in my brain. i'm herman cain.

i've got a sexy brain. >> jimmy: i agree. [ applause ] we have -- we've had a lot of fun with herman cain on the show but it is a lot of work. every time a new woman comes forward, we have to write jokes about it and it can get to be a grind. so, from time to time, we outsource or joke writing to a company in india. i thought we would give them a call tonight on video chat. hey, guys. hello? >> hello, new shoes, you can't lose. how may i help you? >> jimmy: no, no, it's jimmy. >> ah, jimmy kimmel! jimmy kimmel! [ laughter ] >> what's going down, clown? >> jimmy: what? >> what's going down, clown? >> jimmy: oh. ah, nothing. i was just wondering if you had any herman cain jokes for me. >> well, of course, of course. number one funny man, roger. roger! >> jimmy: okay.

yeah. roger's the best. >> jimmy, get ready. comedy cold. >> jimm >> jimmy: okay, i'm ready. oh, there he is. okay. all right. >> ready, jimmy? >> jimmy: yeah, i'm ready. >> what is blond and says "9-9-9?" >> jimmy: i don't know, what is blond and says "9-9-9?" >> herman cain's german secretary. >> jimmy: yeah. i think i heard that one on "conan," to be honest with you. i did. yeah. what else do you have? do you have anything else? >> what nation will herman cain never visit? >> jimmy: i don't know.

>> nomination. >> jimmy: oh, nomination. yeah, i get it. okay, that's -- do i pay for all of these or can i -- a la carte. >> yes, yes, pay for all. >> jimmy: okay. >> it's a good deal. >> jimmy: give us a -- your best one. >> how many herman cains does it take to screw in a lightbulb? >> jimmy: i don't know. how many? >> ah -- none. he -- >> jimmy: screw in -- okay, i get it. hey, get started on newt gingrich, will you? i don't know if we're going to have herman that much longer. >> thanks, jimmy. >> jimmy: okay, thank you very much, guys. they're exhausted after cyber monday. um -- with all eyes on herman

cain, texas governor rick perry reminded us that he's still around. today in new hampshire, he was speaking at a town hall meeting and he only made two mistakes. see if you catch them. >> those of you who are sitting in this hall, who are going to inherit this country, are counting on us. those of you who -- will be 21 by november 12th, i ask for your support and your vote. those of you who won't be, just work hard. >> jimmy: okay, mistake number one, the voting age in this country is 18, not 21. but -- that's only been the case for 40 years. and -- the election is not november 12th, it's november 6th. november 12th would be too late to vote. this is the funniest primary election ever, though. it really is, right? [ applause ] it's almost as if rick perry woke up this morning, read the news about cain, saw all the attention he was getting and said, "you're horny?

well i'm dumb!" and set out to remind us of that. christmas is less than a month away. any of you go black friday shopping over the weeken broken bones? anything sprained? widespread reports of injury and violence at black friday sales across the country this year. but the most talked about incident happened at a walmart in the l.a. area. a woman pepper sprayed other shoppers in a rush to get an xbox. and guess what? it worked. she got the xbox. our local kcal news interviewed a shopper that was a witness and she was kind enough to provide us with our "unintentional joke of the day." >> it was about this big and it was black. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: 9-9 -- oh, one more. 9. here's a new holiday tradition started by a gun club in arizona it's an opportunity for you and

your family to pose with santa and high-powered weapons. there's little tommy and tom sr. with machine guns. this one is great. this is not only the baby touching the machine gun, the dad is pointing the gun right at the mother's brain. [ laughter ] and it's like christmas in the palin house. or a very poorly thought-out arnold schwarzenegger holiday film. we have one more. the income mullty film takes santa hostage. how about you check that list one more time? so -- the sears portrait studio's come quite a long way. my mother wouldn't let me have a bb gun. here's an interesting new show that's coming to tlc on sunday, i think. it's called "virgin diaries." this is a show that follows adults that remain virgins variety of reasons. i think they have a huge hit. >> sunday. >> i'm 30 and a virgin.

>> i'm 29 and i'm a virgin. >> i'm not a virgin entirely by choice. >> i'm saving our first kiss if our wedding. >> i declare you to be husband and wife. ryan, you may kiss your bride. >> really? >> "virgin diaries." a whole new special on on tlc. >> jimmy: what is going on there? [ applause ] appears to be eating her teeth. the tux rental shop said, "just keep the pants." you are hear on a good night tonight. the man, the myth, kazaam himself, shaquille o'neal is with us here tonight. he's promoting his new book. guillermo -- guillermo has the book. it's called "shaq uncut."

is that a coffee table book, guillermo? >> no. >> jimmy: seems kind of big. i don't think he took into account that normal-sized people would be the ones reading. take that down to shaq's dressing room. let's see -- luckily we have a wheelbarrow. take that down -- thank you, guillermo. take that down to shaq's dressing room. i would love to hear an explanation as to why the book itself is so enormous. it seems unnecessarily so but -- that's our green room, everybody iswaiting. oh, there he is. hey, shaq. look at that. shaq -- if you could, just show, like, hold up the book and show us -- >> it's not that big, guillermo. what are you complaining about? where's my tea? >> jimmy: get the man his tea. all right. yeah, that's the book. there, a little cup. see shaq in a minute.

>> i said tea, not coffee! >> jimmy: oh, no, we got trouble. shaq's a lot of fun. earlier this year, guillermo went to shaq's house in florida. we shot this for our nba special last year. since it was in primetime, they wouldn't let us show this specific part. now that we're on at midnight, we're allowed to show it. i don't know. here is an outtake from guillermo's visit to the o'neal mansion. >> i travel all the way to florida to find out what is next for shaquille o'neal. ♪ >> hey, you're here. >> smack it. smack it!

♪ get that close-up. >> i don't know what's going on, but -- that's it from shaq's house. >> jimmy: we have a good show for you tonight. from "twilight," julia jones is here with us. we have music from david guetta and usher. and we'll be right back with shaquille o'neal, so stick around. ok look, when gas prices jump... you still gotta work. so suddenly you're cutting back on everything from family vacations to cell phone minutes. well here's a thought - how bout cuttin' back on gas?

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use the hand towel analyzer at kleenex.com and find out what could be on your cloth hand towel. [ ribbits ] upgrade to kleenex hand towels for a clean, fresh towel every time. so the show went late in tulsa and i woke up in the van in omaha. that's life in a band. got online and got us to the next gig. sound check, equipment check, tweaked the t-shirt designs. nice. showtime. small place, massive crowd. they seemed into it except for the guy throwing stuff. moron. laptop fell but didn't crash. good thing. we killed it. picked up a few new fans. show ended but the night didn't. we drove a few hours before camping out then watched the first cut of our first video. not a bad day. lenovo. for those who do. >> jimmy: hi. welcome back. tonight on the program, you can see her new as both human and

wolf in "the twilight saga: breaking dawn part one," julia jones is here. and then music from this, his latest album, "nothing but the beat," david guetta featuring usher. they are both here together. tomorrow night, my morning jacket. on thursday night, crazy terry browshaw will be here with yellow wolf. so, join us then. our first guest tonight is an nba legend who, in his spare time, dresses up as a sheriff and makes very bad movies. his memoir is called "shaq uncut: my story." he typed it with his own gigantic fingers. please welcome literary giant, shaquille o'neal. [ cheers and applause ]

[ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: shaq, you know -- you know -- this isn't a game. >> i need a second. i'm tired. oh. >> jimmy: i feel like the bachelorette. thank you so much. three roses. that means you really like me, too. how are you? good to see you. >> i'm all right. >> jimmy: enjoying your post-basketball career? >> let's see. i wake up every day at 2:00 p.m. eat a box of frosted flaked. watch maury povich. i dress like this and walk about 20 steps to my office. i sit, i answer no phone calls and i just -- i just act important. >> jimmy: you really are sweating, by the way.

>> i'm hot. i haven't done that in awhile. >> jimmy: you have to be careful. i'm sure you know this because you get so much exercise playing basketball, then, when it stops all of a sudden, you have to really -- you could get guinness book of world records fat if you don't watch it. >> no way. >> jimmy: no way? >> won't ever happen. >> jimmy: never? >> never ever. >> jimmy: never never never? >> if i get fat i'm come kiss you. [ laughter ] >> the day i get fat, you call me out, and i'll come. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: in that case, i'm going to be watching what you eat. you -- this is your book. and it's called "shaq uncut." is this about circumcision? >> actually they didn't have big enough tools to circumcise me. >> jimmy: that's probably true. you tweet a lot. and you -- did you really -- did you sit down and write this or did you tell some guy and he

wrote it out for you? >> little bit of both. >> jimmy: because your spelling on twitter is not that good. i know -- >> no, because -- you have to understand. we have 140 characters and i'm the master of ebonics. for example, don't, how do you spell that ebonically? >> jimmy: i don't know, d-o-t? >> no, d-n-t. >> jimmy: these are abbreviations? >> no, ebonics. >> jimmy: i figured your thumbs were too big to tweet. >> no. >> jimmy: congratulations on this. you were honored with a statue at your alma mater, lsu. [ applause ] that's a big -- how big -- is it bigger than you? >> actually, i was crazy. when i opened my e-mail, the statue was about this size. that thing is about 30 feet. >> jimmy: so it's an actual size

thing? >> yes, it is. >> jimmy: that's cool to have a statue of yourself at your college. i don't have that. one of the two best things that ever happened to you, right? >> yes. >> jimmy: what is the other best thing? >> coming on your show. [ applause ] i love you. >> jimmy: i guess so. the -- are you still running around pretending to be a police officer? >> well, i'm -- it's not pretend. i'm undercover most of the time. i slide in, i slide out. >> jimmy: would you make an arrest, what is the reaction from the people that you arrest? >> well, a lot of times i don't really come in by myself, there's like 12 of us. the first 11 cops they do all the work and i just come in -- >> jimmy: i feel like you miss male companionship because you've touched me a lot. >> that's because i love you. you know i love you.

[ applause ] >> jimmy: i feel like maybe -- maybe we should shower together after the show. >> no way. >> jimmy: you miss showering with the other guys? >> well, i have my own shower because the anaconda -- i have my own shower. >> jimmy: all the great players you played with, lebron, kobe, dwyane wade, kevin garnett, who do you miss showering with the most? [ laughter ] >> like i said, i have my own shower, so -- >> jimmy: yeah, you wouldn't want to spread that rumor around. oh, i want to ask you about this. your girlfriend is a young lady who we, america, met on "flay ve flavor of love." hoops is her nickname. it looks to me as if you're taking your daughter to kindergarten. [ laughter ]

how does this even work? >> she's -- she's a fabulous lady and she's strong and believe it or not, she can carry me on our back. >> jimmy: for real? >> you don't believe me, i'll make her do it. >> jimmy: yeah. go get her and -- after the commercial. is she here? >> she's here. >> jimmy: she really can do that? >> i promise you. >> jimmy: this is either going to be an amazing feat of physical strength or a live television death. [ applause ] what's a date with shaq like? what do you do when you go out on a date? is there a helicopter or is it low key? >> low key. go to the restaurant, make contact with the security adviser, tell him i don't want to be bothered. and we just sit in the back and just hang out. cheese burger, fries, shake. >> jimmy: you talk about, in the book, you talk about some of the

many purchases you've made. and some of them are -- it seems like you buy things competitively. true? >> true. i can remember one time i was at the rolls royce place and i had on some laker shorts and flip-flops. really didn't want the car. i was just looking at the car and the old guy, he comes, he says, can you afford that, sonny boy? i was like -- can i afford it? and then right behind me mike tyson was buying two. now that's a double punch. i'm like, you know what? mike bought a green one and a black one, so i was like, just -- give me that one, give me that one -- watch this. >> jimmy: oh, here we go. >> watch. >> go. >> jimmy: oh! oh, no. oh, no. yeah. all right. wow.

wow. that's impressive. >> thanks, jimmy. >> jimmy: very well done. she is strong. wow. is that something that appeals to you in a woman, someone who can potentially get you out in a fire situation? that's incredible. with the high heels and everything. >> yeah, she's -- >> jimmy: we're going to take a break here and try to absorb what just happened. >> you ccacan do that? >> jimmy: i'll try. we'll do it when we come back. this is his book. you can see him as an nba analyst on tnt this season. we'll be right back. 's's's's's new baked pasta romanas. these warm hearty creations

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>> jimmy: we're back. shaquille o'neal. that is his book. it's called "shaq uncut." you -- you said a lot of things about kobe bryant in the book and have you guys spoken since the book came out? >> yeah, i talked to him two minutes ago. >> jimmy: things are cool? >> mentally. >> jimmy: all right. you sent him a telepathic message? >> yes. >> jimmy: the most damning thing, i think you said, is that he can't rap. >> i didn't say that. he's actually on my second album. he's a great rapper. it was one incident, we were all free styling and he didn't participate and the next day he came back with an elaborate rap, which is -- >> jimmy: you have a better rapper than he is? >> he's good. he's on my second album. he's pretty good. >> jimmy: all right. [ laughter ] because, you know, that's hitting the guy below the belt. >> he's pretty good. what are you talking about. >> jimmy: okay, okay, all right.

but you also think you're pretty good, i mean, you know -- right? i mean, in fairness. >> i went platinum twice, gold twice and wood twice, so -- >> jimmy: when you retire, will you go -- once the period is up, will you go in as a laker or a cavalier? [ applause ] i guess you have to choose between orlando and -- that's some foot you got there. >> probably a laker. >> jimmy: probably a laker? [ applause ] we'd like to see you do that. you -- you're going to be on this -- on tnt with charles barkley, which -- honestly, i think you are the two funniest guys in sports and that is going to be unbelievable, the two of you together. >> i think it's going to be a great show. you have two e bonik ma ebonc m.

>> jimmy: didn't you get into a fight? >> wedy. >> jimmy: do you have twe don't clip. >> he hit me with a ball. my thing was, if i lead with the left, he's going to come that way and i was going to hit him -- i went to swing, somebody grabbed me, tackled me. >> jimmy: it's probably for the best that didn't happen. everyone in the stadium would have been dead. and so, you guys are going to sit next to each other and well, that's going to be someone else. who are you replacing on that show? >> i'm not sure. >> jimmy: are they adding you? >> i don't know. >> jimmy: you don't watch it? >> i did. >> jimmy: so you're traveling around -- >> i think we're doing it in a studio in atlanta. >> jimmy: okay, good. that's going to be great. a lot -- do you want me to try to lift you? >> yeah. >> jimmy: okay, all right. [ applause ]

all right. wow. wait a minute. hold on one second. hold on -- let's take this seriously. i just want to say -- [ cheers and applause ] if i hear the sound of a zipper, i'm going to run. okay? all right. [ applause ] it's not possible. you all right? >> yeah. >> jimmy: let me try one more time. your girlfriend is stronger than me! this is the book.

it's called "shaq uncut: my story." shaquille o'neal. watch him on tnt. we'll be right back with julia jones. done done done done done done,done,done almost done. done done done done done,done,done,done,done done done done ♪ ♪ untamed fruit flavor.

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>> jimmy: well, hi there. i feel like i've been mauled by pit bulls. still to come on the show, david guetta and usher will be here. over the last two weeks, our next guest's new movie has been number one at the box-office and earned over $220 million in this country alone. she is the lone lady werewolf in "the twilight saga: breaking dawn part one." please welcome julia jones. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: i'm not positive but i'm pretty sure i could lift if you. >> i was told that nobody would be lifting me. >> jimmy: who told you that? guillermo? he lies all the time. you were -- well, i got you some flowers. >> i don't know if i -- >> jimmy: did you meet shaq? >> i waved. >> jimmy: you waved?

are you scared of him? >> no, i really like him. >> jimmy: he's so big though. >> yeah. >> jimmy: you really feel, i mean, i felt, anyway, like -- as if he -- if he wanted to do anything, he would be able to do anything. >> that's -- [ laughter ] i think that's probably true. i think that translates to girls, like -- i would be completely safe with him. like nothing bad should ever happen to me. >> jimmy: unless he rolled over on you or something. [ laughter ] like living with a bear. >> well -- >> jimmy: are a you basketball fan in general? >> i grew w up in boston so i a like, in my blood. i don't normally say it. >> jimmy: he played for the celtics. i mean, kind of. >> yeah, i know. >> jimmy: he wore the uniform for the celtics. the last year. >> i -- >> jimmy: your family basketball fans? >> yes, my family, my mother especially. my mom, it was, like, very, very excited that he was going to be on the show.

>> jimmy: oh, you guys went over this before hand? >> oh, did we ever. i got a ten-minute lecture about shaq and how amazing he is. >> jimmy: oh, really. and did you learn anything from that lecture? >> well, i mean, i wasn't -- i hadn't -- it's only become very relevant to me since, you know, like, i've been here basically, but i remember that he -- he's like, was dressed up and he would go and stand in the square like a statue. he did all these really cool things, something about road kill. these are the stories -- >> jimmy: a buffalo or something when he's running. he will carry it home and cook it. he will get like six of them and make a shish kabob. what do your parent boss? your mom is, they're still in boston? >> no, my dad lives in montana. he's a retired attorney and my mom is also an attorney but she runs a nonprofit. >> jimmy: oh, who lawyers.

>> call ed s.a.d.d. students against dangerous decisions. >> jimmy: really? there are no students against dangerous decisions. students are -- invented dangerous decisions. >> there's a -- the minority, a little band of them, all over the country and they are trying to prevent the other students. >> jimmy: i see. they sound like a lot of fun. [ laughter ] and are they -- is your family excited about your success? >> i mean, my family has been so grounding in all of this. they're totally excited and they think it's great but it's like a job. my friends and my family, they are, you know, doctors or lawyers and i'm an actor and it sort of like that -- i'm -- i had to -- i'm not even 100% sure that my mom's seen it. >> jimmy: the movie? >> buzz st she's really excited about shaq. >> jimmy: you don't know that she's seen -- >> you know, i -- she did.

she saw it a couple days ago and texted me. but shaq was a ten-minute phone call. >> jimmy: so she's more excited about shaq than you. i'm so sorry. >> i'm sorry, mom. >> jimmy: don't be sorry to mom. mom should be sorry to you. and on mother's day, maybe a big lump of coal would be appropriate. they don't come to the premieres with you and that sort of thing? >> um, i had friends who came in. a couple of friends -- yeah. >> jimmy: so your friends love you more than your family? [ laughter ] is any of your family excited? >> grandma. >> jimmy: thank god there's somebody. >> my god-sister. >> jimmy: you were here one time before when we had our big, the whole cast was here, right? >> yes. you remember that. >> jimmy: i do remember that, yeah. that was a long night. >> i remember that also. >> jimmy: you didn't get to talk, right? >> not at all. only -- there were 14 of us here and four microphones or something. maybe six.

we were all kind of -- >> jimmy: the vampires were hogging the microphones, weren't they? >> yeah, go figure. >> jimmy: you're the only female in the wolf pack. so, you're the only one who keeps your shirt on, too. >> yes. >> jimmy: that doesn't seem like it would be historically accurate to me. seems like all the wolves would have their shirts off. >> well, we had to stay pg-13. >> jimmy: yeah. you like being the only -- do you guys kind of separate into groups on the set? do you like -- >> a little bit, because we film -- we mostly film at different times, so, when the wolf pack is doing their stuff, the cullens aren't, but -- yeah, it was -- i was around the boys in "eclipse" all the time. >> jimmy: is that a good thing or bad thing? >> it is both. >> jimmy: oh. [ laughter ] >> i mean, it's like having six brothers and they are -- there's just jokesters and i love them all so much but it really did a

job on me. i started to, like, start thinking like a guy. >> jimmy: in what way? were you peeing standing up? [ laughter ] we do that [ applause ] . it's one of our special gifts. you played on, like, the high school football team? >> yeah, yeah. so, i -- >> jimmy: the boys team? >> yes, i plagued in a league called pop warner football, which is real american football with the pads and everything and the only girl in my league. and the boys were so mean to me. >> jimmy: they were? this is before high school, right? >> this was -- yeah. >> jimmy: you were a kid. >> yeah, it was -- yeah, it was like -- i can't remember, i think it must have been second and third grade. >> jimmy: oh, okay, all right. >> but they would just, like, try to prevent me from doing anything. i feel really silly with these in my hand. >> jimmy: oh. i got those for you. >> they're hurting me. >> jimmy: i'm sorry. a giant brought them out here.

>> wait, they're from shaq? >> jimmy: oh! [ cheers and applause ] guillermo? come here for a second. guillermo's wife is having a baby tomorrow and guess what? i bought her some flowers. >> thank you. well, thank you for coming. i'm glad you got to talk this time. >> yes, me, too. >> jimmy: "the twilight saga: breaking dawn part one" is out now. julia jones, everybody. we'll be right back with david guetta and usher. great prices. i just wish you could guarantee me they won't be beat. oh, actually... then i'd be like, you rule! and my kids would be like, you rule! i'd be like, yes, i do rule!

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i know. this is great. you know, i feel like... did you just check the game on your phone? what? no! what am i, like some kind of summoner who can just summon footage to his phone like that? come on. i guess i'm just a little... [ grunts ] oversensitive. it's just that you and i -- yes! [ male announcer ] only at&t's network lets your iphone download 3x faster. at&t. set out to create a different kind of cold remedy using powerful medicine and natural ingredients from around the world. he called it vicks vaporub. today, the vicks journey continues. introducing new vicks nature fusion cold & flu syrup. powerful multi-symptom medicine flavored with natural honey instead of artificial flavors and dyes.

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>> jimmy: this is his new album. it's called "nothing but the beat." the song is called "without you." here with some help from a friend named usher, david guetta! ♪ ♪ i can't win i can't reign i will never win this game without you ♪ ♪ without you ♪ i am lost i am vain i will never be the same without you ♪

♪ without you ♪ i won't run i won't fly i will never make it by without you ♪ ♪ without you ♪ i can't rest i can't fight all i need is you and i without you ♪ ♪ without you ♪ ♪ oh oh oh you oh oh you oh oh ♪ ♪ you oh oh without you ♪ ♪ oh oh oh you oh oh oh ♪ ♪ you oh oh without you ♪

♪ can't erase so i'll take blame but i can't accept that we're estranged ♪ ♪ without you without you ♪ ♪ i can't quit now this can't be right i can't take one more sleepless night ♪ ♪ without you without you ♪ ♪ i won't soar i won't climb if you're not here i'm paralyzed ♪ ♪ without you without you ♪ ♪ i can't look i'm so blind i lost my heart i lost my mind ♪ ♪ without you ♪ without

you ♪ ♪ ♪ oh oh oh you oh oh oh you oh oh you oh oh ♪ ♪ you oh oh without you oh oh you oh oh oh ♪ ♪ you oh oh without you ♪ ♪ i am lost i am vain i will never be the same without you ♪ ♪ without you without you ♪ [ woman ] my boyfriend and i were goining on vacation,

so i used my citi thank you card to pick up some accessories. a new belt. some nylons. and what girl wouldn't need new shoes? we talked about getting a diamond. but with all the thank you points i've been earng... ♪ ...i flew us to the rock i really had in mind. ♪ [ male announcer ] the citi thank you card. earn points you can use for travel on any airline, with no blackout dates.

>> jimmy: we had fun tonight, right? i want to thank shaquille o'neal and julia jones. i want to apologize to matt damon, we ran out of time. tomorrow night, jim parsons, taylor kitsch, music from my morning jacket. this is his new album called "nothing but the beat." playing us off the air with "turn me on," once again, david guetta. good night! ♪ i'm too young to die come on and turn me on turn me on, turn me on

turn me on, turn me on ♪ ♪ boy i'm achin' make it right my temperature is super high ♪ ♪ if i scream if i cry it's only 'cause i feel alive ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪