tonight on "nightline" -- a father regrets. his daughter, jonbenet, was the tiny pageant queen found murdered in their basement. tonight, for the first time, john ramsey speaks out about "toddlers & tiaras." and shares some of his pictures of jonbenet, unseen before now. and "mad men." we've got an exclusive behind-the-scenes day on the set of the retro megahit. the stars sit down with us to talk about the clothes, the smoking, the scotch. and allow us to try for for

season five secrets. also, going in style. anne hathaway. their performances were nothing compared to what happened on wall street today. one high-profile resignation goes viral. >> announcer: from the global resources of abc news, with terry moran, cynthia mcfadden and bill weir in new york city, this is "nightline." march 14th, 2012. and good evening. i'm cynthia mcfadden. we begin with a crime that still haunts after 16 years. jonbenet ramsey, the 6-year-old beauty queen, found murdered in her basement. tonight, with the child pageant scene bigger than ever, jonbenet's father, john ramsey, isn't mincing words. here's abc's juju chang. >> jonbenet ramsey. >> reporter: if jonbenet ramsey were alive today, she'd be 21 years old. what do you think she would have been like?

>> i can't visualize jonbenet at that age. my image of her in my mind, is as a 6-year-old little girl. >> reporter: john ramsey remembers his daughter as fresh-faced and sporty. not as the tragic child beauty skween with glamorous curls and full makeup, who the world found was found murdered in her own home in 1996. >> she had a smile. >> reporter: all these years later, john has found an unexpected path to forgiveness. but not one without regret. the kidty pageant phenomenon, seen on "toddlers & tiaras," makes ramsey uncomfortable now. ♪ i want to be a cowboy >> reporter: and if he had another chance, he says he would not let jonbenet compete publicly like that. today, much more so than even in the '90s, the whole "toddlers and tiaras" thing.

>> that's pretty bizarre. >> reporter: what do you think of that? >> i think it's bizarre. patsy and jonbenet didn't approach it that way. they just did it for fun. >> reporter: were you naive about letting her compete in pageants? >> yeah, probably. yeah. >> reporter: but your lesson was, what if we inadvertently exposed her to the killer? >> obviously, you don't want to keep her locked up in the house. but it's an awareness, as a good parent, be a little more aware than we were. not everyone around you is a nice, good person. >> reporter: in fact, in his new book, "the other side of suffering," ramsey writes that a stranger approached jonbenet during a parade like this one, just days before she was murdered. it's a fact that still haunts him. >> anonymity is probably a good thing. and i don't know if that's what drew the attention of the killer. >> reporter: it was the morning after christmas, when the ramseys woke up and jonbenet was

gone. they found a ransom note threatening to kill her if they didn't pay $118,000. but by nightfall, john made a horrifying discovery in their basement. >> i tell people the worst part of that morning was not finding her. it was realizing that she was gone and taken. when i found her, it was a rush of relief. and then, of course, within moments, i realized that she probably was dead. but she was back in my arms. >> reporter: within hours, the ramseys, especially john, felt they were being treated as suspects. what is that like, living under that cloud of suspicion? >> at the time, we were so lost by the loss of our child, it didn't matter. >> the footprints, dna evidence. all clues that fueled a media frenzy unlike any in modern journalism. they eventually sat down with barbara walters to try to set

the record straight. >> mr. ramsey, did you kill jonbenet? >> no. >> mrs. ramsey, did you kill your daughter? >> no. i did not kill my daughter. >> reporter: it would take years for the boulder attorney's office to xleer the ramsey family. but not before patsy lost her battle with ovarian cancer. his successful business, no longer his. the finances and the family's reputation seemed beyond repair. >> this room will be the master bedroom. >> reporter: despite the loss of jonbenet and patsy, today, john has found love again. he married his new wife, jan, in july. and they're in the process of renovating this modest home in rural michigan. i see this as metaphor for your life. >> it is. >> reporter: rebuilding. >> we're developing it together. >> reporter: for a man who used to employ hundreds of people, john ramsey says he's learned to love downsizing. he says years of healing and praying have helped him get past

hopelessness and despair. it seems that you chronicle almost the secret power of forgiveness. >> i struggled a lot with forgiveness and what that meant. the first phase was, i can't forgive this creature. if i get hands on him, we won't need a trial. >> reporter: no one would blame you for being angry. >> and i was for a time. but you can't stay there. it's damaging to you as a person. and that gets back to this forgiveness concept. you have to forgive yourself. to let it go. >> reporter: forgiveness may be about letting go of his past. but john still holds on to the happy times. like this picture, drawn by jonbenet just days before her death. >> this one she did, actually, at sunday school. it's mary and joseph and the baby jesus. >> reporter: and what do you think of when you see this? >> it makes me happy. and i know she was happy as a child. i told her every day i loved her. and she knew i loved her. and she was loved. and i think it's reflected in

the picture. >> reporter: for "nightline," i'm juju chang, in charleroi, michigan. >> a father looks back at a crime still unsolved. coming up, it's the smoking, drinking, philandering television blockbuster. we get a rare trip behind the scenes of "mad men." [ tires squeal, engine revs ] ♪

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>> announcer: "nightline" continues from new york city, with cynthia mcfadden. "mad men." it's a television phenomenon, winning four back-to-back emmys for best drama, while making the world of 1950s advertising look oh, so glamorous. well, tonight, as the show gets ready to start its

hotly-anticipated fifth season, we have a rare tour of the closed set, thrown open for our cameras. here's abc's chris connelly. >> nostalgia literally means the pain from an old wound. a twinge in your heart, far more powerful than memory alone. >> reporter: memory and power. pain and old wounds. and jon hamm as the dashing and inigmatic ad man, don draper. >> i need you to get a cardboard box. put your things in it. >> reporter: all are set to return for the fifth season of amc's "mad men," on march 25th. bringing viewers back to the hard-living advertising world of the 1950s. we were given a tour of the set

from "mad men's" creator, matthew weiner. >> we're shooting don's funeral today. >> reporter: uncomfortable moments in this room. >> uncomfortable moments everywhere on this set. some of them we even filmed. >> reporter: from the smokes and the booze, to the memos and ibm selectrics. weiner is not only for the story telling, fascinating and appalling its devoted fans. >> what do women want? >> who cares? >> reporter: he also oversees "mad men's" appeal. >> this is a reproduction of what truman had on his desk. an autographed picture of buddy epson, the hottest show at the time. you see the frame in the pilot. she is not on the cast yet. >> what a great gal. >> if you look at the pilot, and see the picture, that's a picture of my mother.

>> reporter: advertisers with the taste. >> it looks like a thing. it's a high-fi. there's 3 million cigarettes smoked in this thing. >> do they use a black light? >> i would advise against it. >> reporter: peggy olsen was a secretary. now, she's a copywriter with an office of her own. >> it's all period. every, single thing. it's incredible. very important, to keep that close at hand. obviously. >> reporter: as joan, the agency's imperially sultry office manager, christina hendricks sets hearts ablaze. >> be careful with the cares. >> reporter: everyone wants to see how you walk. why don't you show us how you sit in the chair. >> delicately. you have to do a perfect balance in the middle. test it. test it. okay. we're there.

>> reporter: while no one will say where "mad men's" plot lines may be headed, it's bolstered by the mind meld of its creator and its star. >> jon and i have a lunch about what's going to happen and where it's gone. i'm a very collaborative person. i may not remember that jon gave me the best ideas of the season. i may not ever mention it again. we have a deal that he, you know, gets to be out there, superhandsome. and i get to have the ideas. >> reporter: to play don draper, hamm takes cues from memories of his late father. >> i remember going through my dad's closet and seeing row upon row of suits. probably like 70 suits. who has 70 suits now? it's kind of a lost part of dressing up now. or special occasion. but i think the show's bringing it back a little bit. >> reporter: it is. what's that like to have that kind of influence on the culture? >> it's pretty great. it's a pretty cool thing. >> reporter: for both genders, costume designer janemy bryant

and her team, create the looks in the show. >> this is the iconic blue betty coat. i found it at one of my favorite vintage stores here in los angeles. >> reporter: and with the stylings of january jones, set as don's ex-wife, betty. >> they're awful. >> i think sometimes people are attracted -- women are attracted to bad boys. and because they have great suits. >> yeah. the wardrobe helps, i guess. >> they look great, as you're being treated like crap. >> reporter: 13 episodes of vetting and back stabbing mischief now lie ahead. but no one's forgotten the five years matt weiner was out of work. when this story existed only as a pilot script, acclaimed by other writers, but one produced until amc saved it. what was your reaction after elisabeth moss read for the role the first time? >> how do i tell this without

looking less macho. no one had ever read any of the script out loud. and i went to the men's room. and i cried. >> reporter: he burst into tears. >> that's what i hear. that's what i hear because -- >> a good ad man. >> oh, my god, jon. it's so awful. we're never going to get this made. >> reporter: like the script he was reading for, the show's leading man was battered by years of rejection. all those years when, they just weren't casting guys like you. you must have thought, i'm just a guy of a time. >> it felt that way. i was a little older. i wasn't getting "dawson's creek." i didn't look 17 when i was 17. that's the way it was. i would get called in for their dad. >> reporter: did you ever think back to the months when you wondered if you would get to play this guy? >> yeah. i was in a place where i had -- i had tested for about seven --

that was my record, seven shows and not gotten any of them. and this was the last. and i thought, well, here we go. 0 for 8, i guess. i can go for it. >> reporter: you were going to be like the great tragic story. that guy, he had that great script. they never made it. and now, everything you could have possibly dreamed about has happened. >> just having you compose that question is, you know, is an out-of-body experience for me. i wish it on everyone. every artist out there should get to have this experience for a second, even. it's a very, very rare gift that i am absorbing. >> cheers. >> reporter: i'm chris connelly, for "nightline," in los angeles. >> charming. and for even more of our backstage tour, including several exclusive interviews, be sure to visit our website, abcnews.com/nightline. and coming up, how to quit with flare. ever attempted to leave like

jerry maguire? well, meet a wall street big-wig who, today, went out with a bang. [ nadine ] buzzzz, bzzzz, bzzzz, bzzzz, you know, typical alarm clock. i am so glad to get rid of it. just to be able to wake up in the morning on your own. that's a big accomplishment to me. i don't know how much money i need. but i know that whatever i have that's what i'm going to live within. ♪ ♪ ♪ oh, my maltipoo's depressed. but my affordable prius c means i can pay for his acupuncture. whew. i love my pooch. oh no! my homemade sushi... turned p-ushi! use estimated 53 mpg to find a gluten-free alternative. look, this means i'm a chef.

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to many people, the giant investment bank, goldman sachs, represents corporate greed at its apex. and today, in a shocking move, one of the company's executives said just that, as he quit. but his resignation letter was certainly not sent in the usual way. even hollywood hadn't thought of this one. for abc's david wright, that's a "sign of the times."

>> i'm mad as hell. and i'm not going to take this anymore. >> reporter: we've all had days like howard deal in the classic movie "network." >> i'm mad as hell. >> reporter: but how many of us act on that rage? trader greg smith did today, with an op-ed in "the new york times," why i'm leaving goldman sachs. he writes that the environment there is toxic and destructive. and the greedy bankers reteenly talk of ripping off their muppet clients. call him the jerry maguire of investment banking, conscience triumphs over greed. >> i'm going to do what all you think i'm going to do, which is flip out. >> reporter: hollywood loves a quitter. >> please bore someone else with your questions. >> reporter: think anne hathaway's character in "the devil wears prada." or ed norton's character, "in fight club." literally beating himself up in

the boss' office. >> what are you doing? >> reporter: in real life, some people do quit in spectacular ways. most famously, that jetblue flight attendant, who slid down the emergency slide. >> they treat us like [ bleep ] here. >> reporter: on youtube, you'll find joe quit, who worked at the providence marriott. >> i'm here to tell you that i'm quitting. >> reporter: he brought his own marching band for backup. and there's how to quit mcdonald's. [ bleep ] you. [ bleep ] you. >> reporter: whether you're flipping burgers or flipping multimillion-dollar deals, quitting is powerful stuff. but today, goldman sachs took issue. in a firm our size, it's not shocking that some people could feel disgrundled wrote zee lloyd blankfein in response. but today, one disgruntled guy spoke louder than the world's most powerful bank. one london website offered a "star wars"