tv Jimmy Kimmel Live ABC August 4, 2012 12:00am-1:05am EDT
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morning america." they are working while you you are sleeping. jimmy kimmel is up next. have a great weekend. >> dicky: tonight on "jimmy kimmel live," jessica biel. >> you act like you are into me. >> jimmy: i would would like see a mondaymentalist version of the bachelor. >> this week is unnecessary censorship. >> we need tax cuts. >> and music from rick ross. >> real housewives, we did it, >> and music from rick ross. >> real i got the chanceid it, to start my own business.
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i know what it's like to hire people and to make ends meet. from those experiences, i had the chance of running the olympics. the games were in real trouble. there'd been way too much spending. and in massachusetts i found a budget that was badly out of balance. our legislature was 85% democrat. and every one of the four years i was governor, we balanced the budget. i want to o use those experiens to help americans have a better future. we believe in our future. we believe in ourselves. we believe the greatest days of america are aad. i'm mitt romney and i approve this message.
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show. thank you for coming out to visit. welcome to california for those of you who are here out of town. it's thursday. it's the weekend is almost here which means another lindsay lohan car accident is upon us. she had another car accident. at this point, it would be more efficient if i told you when she didn't get into a car accident. she rear ended someone on sunset boulevard yesterday, which i think means six more weeks of summer, right? [ laughter ] she reportedly rear ended a silver mustang that was stopped at a traffic light. this is the car that she allegedly hit. zoom in a bit. you can see the vehicle suffered massive damage. it was almost totaled. it was just a fender bender. which for her is not a bad kind of bender as far as benders go. but -- she was driving the same porsche -- i guess rented. she was driving the same porsche when she hit somebody last month.
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this is how porsche tests the around here we consider getting hit by lindsay lohan good luck. take a quick poll of the audience, how many of you have been hit by lindsay lohan in a car? some point or another? fewer than i anticipated. bottom line, she's not a good driver. meanwhile, there's some serious family drama in the jackson family right now. since michael jackson's death in 2009, his mother, katherine jackson, has had custody of his kids, paris, prince michael and blanket. let's not forget he named a kid blanket. but over the weekend, paris who is 14 years old, tweeted that her grandmother was missing and that she hadn't spoken to her a week. this is the woman who is supposed to be watching them. germaine jackson tweeted grandma is find and resting in arizona under doctor's orders. marlyn jackson said he was being
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kept away from his mother katherine jackson and blamed janet, randy and jermaine for it. this was a huge blowout on monday. some of f it was caught on vide pe. the police came in. some reports said t.j. jackson put randy in a head lock and punched him in the mouth. which is weird because i don't even know there was a t.j. jackson. i guess he is tito's son. this whole family needs to go for a long moon walk in the park together and straighten this all out. someone said that grandma katherine had been kidnapped by her own children. in a plot to get money from michael's estate. last night katherine jackson appeared on "nightline" to let the world know she is fine. >> there are rumors going around me that i've been kidnapped. and held against my will. i'm here today to let everybody know i'm fine and i'm here with my children and my children would never do a thing like that, holding me against my will. that's very stupid. very people to think that.
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>> jimmy: she's wearing a bullet proof wig. since katherine left and went to arizona, a judge granted temporary custody of the kids to t.j. i hope t.j. is short for tito j.r. we're running low on tito. i hope they can figure it out soon. i'm busy keeping up with the kardashian. i have no time for the jacksons. what's happening with the family is unfortunate, when the jackson family is in the news, it's a lot of fun to hear the recorders say their names. >> there is word from los angeles that katherine jackson is back here. >> paris jackson. >> paris and prince. >> paris. >> prince. >> and blanket. >> t.j., blanket and prince. >> prince. >> janet and randy. >> t.j. >> t.j. >> randy and tito. >> randy, jermaine and janet. >> katherine jackson playing uno.
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>> jimmy: wow there you have. the jacksons are not the only families embroiled in legal battle right now. cody brown, the polygamist stars on the tlc sister wives. he has filed a lawsuit against the state of utah challenging their ban on polygamy. sit a practice of marrying multiwomen at the same time. concept that was invented very long time ago by a man. [ laughter ] and the utah attorneys general's office has asked the judge to throw the case out. utah has a policy of not prosecuting people on polygamy charges alone. the judge said he doesn't want to throw it out and the attorney general may be trying to sweep this issue under the rug. i hope they do legalize polygamy. how else are we going to replenish our preserve? it makes for great television. i would like to see -- if i had one one wish, i would like to see a mormon version of
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"the bachelor" where he picks all 25 of them. [ applause ] right? this is crazy, this is great video. there was a fishing tournament held in san diego last week. one lucky competitor hooked into a 800-pound maco shark. >> he's okay. he is probably going to let him follow it. let it go. >> whoo! >> oh, my god! >> oh, my god! holy [ bleep ]. >> look at that. >> oh, my god! oh, my god! >> one, two, three four. >> is that camera on? >> oh, my god! >> yeah. whoa! >> oh, my god, dude! >> watch out, dudes. don't let that thing on this boat. >> jimmy: good thinking.
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. i love to hear people -- when people shot a shark, they get very excited. this is a video we showed a few weeks ago of a woman who had her fish stolen by a shark in myrtle beach. listen how nuts she goes. >> holy [ bleep ]. >> oh! it's all mine! it's all mine! get it. son -- it's a shark! >> it's a shark! a shark! it's a shark! >> jimmy: it's the same -- that is a shark voice. that is a shark voice. other animals don't elicit that level of excitement. you would not here that screaming for something like that. >> oh, my god! >> jimmy: see, it doesn't really fit. president obama had an event in new orleans last night. she was speaking to members of national urban league. he gave young people there a lecture about competing with kids in other country. >> you're competing against
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young people in beijing and bangalore. you know, they are not hanging out. they're not getting over. they're not playing video games. they're not watching "real housewives." >> jimmy: well, there you go. the president of the united states knows what "real housewives" is. we did it. we broke america. and by the way -- [ applause ] i don't know if you noticed, but what exactly was this? >> they're not getting over. >> jimmy: i understood hangs out. what the hell is getting over. what does that mean? does it make you pregnant? and more importantly, why does the president know slang that i don't? i think obama's overall message is get serious and do your home work, kids. thanks for ruining summer vacation, president buzz kill. there happens to be a lot of things our kids can learn from
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watching the real housewives. in fact, i happen to have some examples right here. >> costa rica is in mexico. . black man like a donkey booty. if you want a black man, you got to put meat and potatoes on them bones. >> jimmy: thank you real housewives. it's knowledge. the summer olympics begin tomorrow in london. the summer olympics are that special time over four years and suddenly, it's okay to cheer for badminton. this is the 30th olympics. it's weird there are only 30. there are been more seasons of bachelorette. here is the fun olympic fact. first year in history in which every country participating sent at least one female
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competitor. women are now competing in tae kwon do. this year women's boxing has been added to the competition. if there's one person -- it's a great thing. one person we can thank for paving the way for women in the olympics it is this lady. we should pave the way. if it wasn't for her, there would be no hope solo. did you know they give athletes a test to verify their sex? not what you think. it's a blood test. first they check their hormone levels and then they have them put on a pair of jeans. if the athlete asks does my butt look fat in these it's a woman. >> some of them are too attractive. we came up with a fun game to play tonight. you have to guess who this person is an olympic athlete or adult film star. it's a game we creatively titled olympian or adult film star. okay? [ cheers and applause ] very simple. you decide.
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is this an olympian or an adult film star. she is on the beach. she's -- but she also has i just did it hair style going. what do you think? film star. all right. that is an adult film star. sunny leon. that's what she says her name. next photo. olympian or adult film star? olympian. all right. we're mixed on this one. he is an olympian. italian fencer named aldo montana. a great name. next we have this gentleman. cleavage. film star some are saying. i don't know. he is not shaved. he -- well, let's see. what is he? that is, yes, that is the
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captain of the u.s. mens water polo team. next up this is a tough one. is snake charming an olympic event? olympian or adult film star? adult film. okay. we are mixed but most say adult film star. that is an olympian. that is a field hockey player from the netherlands. three more. this guy looks like an athlete. wearing acidwash jeans. olympian or adult film star? >> film star. >> jimmy: that is kenny styles, an adult film star. themselves. people are so proud of themselves. next up, all right, she is wearing lingerie, also sitting by the pool. could mean she's a swimmer. olympian or adult film star?
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all right. well, we don't know for sure. that is, let's see, tennis player. ivanovic. olympian. this is the last one, this one is difficult. olympian or adult film star? we're going to go with both on that one. thank you for playing. one more thing shs it's thursday night, time for our weekly tribute to the fcc where we bleep and blur things whether they need it or not. it is this week in unnecessary censorship. >> mark philips found out today that a lot of londoners are already [ bleep ] up. >> you're 88. >> 88 today. >> world war ii vet and you [ bleep ] the queen. >> three times. >> three times? >> yes. >> i'm dr. phil and together we are [ bleep ] america. >> i've been really excited and nervous to [ bleep ] you especially. >> we need tax cuts for working americans not for [ bleep ] who don't need it.
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>> if you were to sit twice and [ bleep ] call them the olympic rings, be my guest. >> have you ever been to a party and have to [ bleep ] a hole in a watermelon and couldn't figure out thousand do it. >> when i was little we had a horse and the horse actually [ bleep ] me in the face. >> horse [ bleep ]. >> from hoover, alabama. >> this is just a guy [ bleep ] his cousin's wife, not a big deal. >> after dinner i'm going to chew up [ bleep ]. >> the blue team st still laboring over the first part of their punishment. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: tonight on the show, from the travel channel, adam richman is here to talk sandwiches, we have music from rick ross, and we'll be right back with jessica biel, so stick around. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ graduated high school today.
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my crowning achievement thus far. mom took a bunch of amazing pictures. but she can't share them. it's her data plan. she's stressing about overages because she already downloaded a fifteen megabyte cat video. [ laughing ] aww. you have to see this. i've already seen it, nana. like a hundred times. [ male announcer ] why limit your iphone? switch to sprint. the only network with truly unlimited data for your iphone. in applebee's new lemon shrimp fettuccine is here just in time for summer. lemons... [ male announcer ] is this gonna take a really long time? i haven't even... [ male announcer ] here's the part you really care about. the new lemon shrimp fettuccine tastes incredible. it's one of the new fresh flavors of summer, starting at just $9.99 at applebee's. see you tomorrow. degree created an antiperspirant that's just as strong. degree clinical protection. up to three times the strength of a basic antiperspirant.
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and then, with music from this new album, it comes out tuesday, called "god forgives, i don't," rick ross from the bud light outdoor stage. hosting your own talk show is great because you get free index cards and you get to talk to people like our first guest. if you happen to have two spare hours next weekend, you can see her punching, kicking and wrestling kate beckinsale in a new version of the sci-fi classic "total recall." it opens in theaters august 3rd. please welcome jessica biel. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> jimmy: you look fantastic. >> thank you. so do you. >> jimmy: congratulations on engagement to that guy. >> thank you so much. oh, that guy. >> jimmy: what happened to your hand? did it get hit by a meteor. >> yes, it did. he did a good job. 6. >> jimmy: did he pick it out
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himself? >> yes, he did. >> >> jimmy: how did he do that. >> what do you mean? >> jimmy: what guys know about diamonds. >> him, he does. >> jimmy: i guess so. you have to be a rich guy who knows about that sort of thing to know about sort of thing. >> my man just has class, i think. i like that guy a lot. >> jimmy: by the way, i want to the thank you. the last time you were hear, it was not on the actual show. but we shot on exercise video together. >> yes, we did. >> jimmy: we had many beautiful women in this exercise video and me. >> that's right. >> jimmy: it was called the hotty body exercise video. >> yes. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: amongst everyone that was there, you really stood out. you were shining. >> did i? >> jimmy: yes, you did. let me show you why. >> oh, god. oh, my god. >> jimmy: that was remarkable. >> i don't ever need to see that again, ever, ever again.
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jimmy, please -- >>immy: just one more time. [ cheers and applause ] how do you do that? >> that is so horrifying. >> jimmy: i don't think of it as horrifying when i see it. >> did you see my face? testify like serial siller going on there. >> jimmy: i saw it repeatedly. >> i think that was like many beyonce videos. >> jimmy: can by honest, i actually tried like to do it myself. >> did you film it? >> jimmy: no. because i couldn't -- i would have to be in on earthquake do that. you would have to fwlu me to the floor and have my butt -- >> i have never moved like that in my life before and ever after that was an isolated experience. >> jimmy: it was something you . learned in some exercise class or some movie you trained to beat somebody up with your stomach? >> i literally think -- i passed out when that happened. i don't remember doing that.
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>> jimmy: i passed out also. i speak for all of us when i say we passed out when that happened. [ applause ] >> oh, my god. >> jimmy: that's a great skill to have. it really is. >> thank you. i'll try to cultivate that again somehow. >> jimmy: i hope you pass that on to your children and they to their children. >> oh, god. >> jimmy: like, can your grandma do that? is she able? >> probably because one of my grandmothers is an incredible dancer. so that's probably where that was from. my other grandmother is an incredible artisan. >> jimmy: really? what does she make? >> well, we call her biels. >> jimmy: she's a marine or something. >> yeah, that's it. like an nfl player of something. i don't know what it is with that. but she she paints, she makes things out of gourds. i didn't know what that meant until she was making that thing out of gourd. >> jimmy: worthless -- they're fruits or vegetables. >> worthless. >> jimmy: they use them for m e
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morocmor are rocca and stuff like that. >> she paints on them. she paints things and people and frogs and stuff. she is from florida. not only do we call her biel we call her road kill because she -- i mean. she's quite a forward thinker. he could take the squashed lizards and frogs in florida and press them beautifully into clay enter would paint them and bake them and then send them to me as an neck lace. >> jimmy: wow. >> i still have them. >> jimmy: so squirrels. >> no little frogs. like a squashed lizard. like that. hanging on a chain with a bead and a beautiful braided thing. >> jimmy: you would wear this. >> oh, yeah. it's from biels. >> jimmy: does she sell them to people? >> no, never for profit. just for grandchildren. >> jimmy: would she kill the animals herself to get jewelry out of them. >> i don't know. she's a little shifty.
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you don't know ab -- she could have. i don't know. i don't think so. >> jimmy: does she come out to visit? she could make a lot of money off that sort of thing. >> i think so too. she has come out before. but the last time that i invited her to come to premier, she was too busy with the crafts and said that she needed to stay at her workplace. >> jimmy: really? it was a travel weekend and lot of animals being run over. >> either the highway was jam packed. it was exciting. she was scraping. >> jimmy: your grandma is out on the highway looking around for dead things? >> i guess. yes. that's her on the side of the street. >> jimmy: nicely done biel. do you do weird things like that? >> no, i don't do a lot of scraping of corpses. >> jimmy: what would you do over the summer as a kid? >> well, we lived in boulder, so, i mean, anything outdoors you can imagine. skate boarding, bike riding, hiking, kayaking, everything. snow boarding during the winter. always outside constantly. >> jimmy: no sitting inside playing video games. >> no. the only game i had was mario 1
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nintendo. i literally had to not watch tv for a year to get there. it was a thing with my folks. >> jimmy: your parents were strict about that. were you a tomboy? >> yes. my dad would say don't come back without a scratch. don't come back unless you have grass stains on your jeans. >> jimmy: really? >> then you've done something today. >> jimmy: is that right? >> yeah. >> jimmy: that was his thing? >> it was his fault. >> jimmy: my mother would scream at me if we came back with grass stain on our jeans. >> complete opposite. get in the dirt now. get in there. >> jimmy: really? how, this a strange family. are they all unnaturally good looking? >> my mother and father are incredibly beautiful people. and my grandparents, everyone. thank them. i had nothing to do with it. >> jimmy: we all thank them. thank you guys. we'll take a break and come back and talk about total recall which is a lot of fun. jessica biel is here.
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>> jimmy: you fight a lot in in movie. it was fun. it was weird though because kate and i, we always fight dudes, usually in movies. we fight girls in real life. you're fighting some guy, some vampire some crazy monster, but never fought another woman before. >> jimmy: is that different? >> yes. >> jimmy: why? >> it's kate beckinsale. i don't want to make a mistake and punch her in the face. >> jimmy: right. >> plus her husband is right there staring at me. >> jimmy: he directed the movie. but he's probably rooting for you in that situation. let's be honest. you know what it's like to be -- >> it was so weird because -- i mean, girls fighting girls makes for terrible outtakes. >> jimmy: why? >> because it's not cool. we do the scene. we fight a fight. oh, my god, my hair. i didn't put pull it. you are so cute. you look so pretty. no, you look so pretty. that's literally what it's like. >> jimmy: that doesn't so sound so bad to me. >> it's not cool at all. >> jimmy: guys don't do that? they're not apologetic
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afterwards? >> no, because you can actually just punch those dudes and they are like. >> jimmy: they are fine with it. they can't admit it. i'm going to ask you to do me a favor. i've been working on a project this summer. i'm trying to rewrite my personal history. did you go to the prom when you were in high school? did you go to high school or show business high school? >> i was in show biz high school. i was working around when i started -- when i was a freshman and i was on set with a tutor for the most part and following different random curriculums. i ended up going to a couple of dances with my friend beverly mitchell who played my sister on 7th heaven. i went to her school. because she would call me and say, i have a friend who doesn't have a date, would you go? i was like, sure, i'll go. i got decked out and show up and ended up always being the date for the sexually questionable dude.
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i was basically a beard. i would show up and he could ditch me. >> jimmy: i have another sexually questionable dude. what we have here is -- if you come over here for one second. if you would be so kind. this is me in high school. >> pink tux. >> jimmy: i didn't have a pink tux. that part is fake. if would go ahead there and -- i'm going to put this in my pers thal book. and then we'll pretend that you and i went to the prom together. >> you're a little stiff. if you would loosen up. if you could act like you're into me. i was much more loose then. yeah, that's good. blowing in the ear. >> maybe like this. >> jimmy: good. i think we got it. let's play it ck and see if we got it. i want to make sure i have this just right.
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>> you're doing it again. you're doing that thing again. >> no. >> jimmy: wow! there's a lot of action going on there. well, thank you so much. this is really going to help me forget. >> any time. >> jimmy: jessica biel! "total recall" opens in theaters on august 3rd. we'll be right back with adam richman. [ cheers and applause ] shakespeare fest. 10 o'clock. [ sr. emt ] a manmergency this tragic calls for the strongest stuff we got.
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[ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: we're back. still to come, music from rick ross. our next guest has one of the greatest jobs imaginable -- he gets paid to eat. after surviving "man vs. food," his new quest is called "adam richman's best sandwich in america." watch it wednesday nights on travel channel. please say hello to adam richman. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ how are you? >> thank you for having me >> jimmy: thanks for coming. you're not a chef, not a food critic, you're just a guy who likes to eat? >> yes. you sound like i haven't done much in my life. >> jimmy: being a guy who likes to eat is an important thing.
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i consider myself as a guy who likes to eat. and we could probably be problems. people might think adam richman showed up at their restaurant if i show up there. >> the gene pool in brooklyn is very, very small. >> jimmy: first of all, you had a show "man versus food." they challenge you to eat an uncomfortable amount of food. >> or incredibly spicy food. >> jimmy: you have many challenges. what was your record? >> i did 59 of them. and i guess my win percentages is around 65, 67%, so it's almost an arizos good as s.a.t. scores. [ applause ] >> jimmy: i don't know if we should be applauding that. i really don't know. now you have a much more reasonable show and a show that i think must be a lot more fun. >> it's a blast. >> jimmy: you go around -- i've been doing this unprofessionally my whole life. trying to find the best sandwich in had america.
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>> yes. >> jimmy: how does it work? bus a burger count? >> no burgers and no dogs, no pitas, no wraps and nothing open faced. we wanted to create what is between two slices of bread, bun, and we created the bite scale to e vail wait evaluate it. what is the bite scale? >> bread, interior, taste and eating experience. >> jimmy: let's go through that. bread is something people take for granted. >> most people think it's for all the crap inside. it is not. it is not a crap conveyance device. it can make a really good flavor impact. big texture impact. something gets soggy half way through, it affects the eating experience. >> jimmy: we have on the same wavelength. you have no idea. all right, now. interior, the ingredients inside. >> the interior is ingredients. i like different temperatures. different textures. ic i like -- is it spicy,
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something sweet to work against it? >> jimmy: i had a major -- i wouldn't call it discovery but a revelation when i was in high school i was working at a pizza place. he made the bread in the middle of night. on thursday -- tuesday and thursday, you would come in and the bread was hot and fresh and and i would take -- melt the provolone cheese on the bread and put it back in the oven and put the cold roast beef, lettuce, tomato on the sandwich. the inside use cold and the outside without hot. it was ray zi. >> i'm aroused. >> jimmy: let's talk about the sandwiches. how do you find these places? just reputation? >> so march madness style. ten regions. one is suggested by a celebrity and the other two are my picks. it's hard to pick two sandwiches
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to typify a whole region. but i did my damneddest. our original hometown the northeast, kevin rock recommended primanti brothers. >> jimmy: they put french fries on the sandwich. >> and the city of brotherly love in philadelphia >> jimmy: i have not had that. sounds good. >> bring an extra pair of trousers. a word from your uncle adam. and pastrami and corn beef. and i know you were this tampa for an awhile. two of our sandwiches were in tampa. >> jimmy: i've had it. >> jimmy: a blackened group ruben. >> jimmy: i've had that too. it's a local favorite. that one is great. >> you have this one, knock it out of the park.
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shrimp po boy on annunciation street in new orleans. >> jimmy: i look them up before i go. i don't think we should be proud of this. >> that's the thing about sandwiches. it's just your imagination bound by two pieces of bread. i love every income group has a sandwich. every culture has a sandwich and now people brown bag it more than every, the food truck movement is super popular and it's a portable meal. >> jimmy: what about here in l.a. have you had any great ones? >> obviously, philippe, the home of the french dip. >> jimmy: they invented the french dip sandwich. but i don't think it's the best french dip sandwich i've ever had. >> we're both from brooklyn. brennan and carr to me is pretty remarkable. avenue u. >> jimmy: that's my old neighborhood right there. >> i literally went to the "y" right across the street from there. i lived in the same neighborhood. >> jimmy: you can go gorge yourself and go exercise.
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>> or drown. 50/50. >> jimmy: what have you had in the west out here? >> i love the restaurant sun of a gun. >> jimmy: they make a great sandwich. up in seattle, there's a place called salumi. have you had that one? >> in the show. we showcase the ox tail sandwich. >> jimmy: that's a great sandwich. >> people in the audience -- >> jimmy: phoenix, arizona. >> everything is great from there. >> jimmy: couple of good places here, the god mother at bay city is here. >> i've heard about that also. san francisco, tons of great sandwiches. terminal market. we covered wexler's, pulled lamb sandwich. >> john: largemont village wine. i think we should run away together, really. [ cheers and applause ] i used to have an adam.
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it worked out well between us. >> no vegas, i don't know any great sandwiches. >> jimmy: vegas has a lot of fancy restaurants. little place, nothing that jumps to mind. >> great one we used to go to called hot and juicy crawfish. it's in the asian -- >> jimmy: that's my old neighborhood. me and cleto, we green grew up right there. >> we had sort of frame out massage parlors with darkened windows and a red open sign. >> jimmy: that's it. do you remember exactly where that was? >> remarkable clarity. >> jimmy: well, to it's greet you have here. sounds like you're having a lot of fun. [ cheers and applause ] >> i have to say, as a boss tone's fan, it's an honor to meet you, mr. barrett. >> thank you very much. >> jimmy: adam richman,
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>> jimmy: his new album, "god forgives, i don't," comes out next week. here with the song "so sophisticated," rick ross. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ let go ♪ let go ♪ i'm so sophisticated to get a verse from me you gotta be initiated ♪ ♪ to get a purse from me she gotta be sophisticated ♪ ♪ purchase a whip from me and never miss a single payment ♪ ♪ i'm from the city where the muslims even christians hate it ♪ ♪ even the black folk hate to see another made it tell all them to chill champagne refrigerated ♪ ♪ just bought a chopper 'cause the last one got it confiscated ♪ ♪ counting a hundred mill so many times i contemplated ♪ ♪ you wanna be the hottest but that get complicated i pull your card ♪ ♪ i know you're by your conversation ♪ ♪ show you the safe you'll have to kill me for that combination ♪ ♪ made another two mill i just off the compilation ♪ ♪ i just hit a lick i'm telling you this amazing
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got a white ♪ ♪ she me just like she jamaican ♪ ♪ sippin' purple and that [ bleep ] concentrated ♪ ♪ this for my [ bleep ] in them prisons, overpopulated ♪ ♪ this the mob so you gotta get initiated if you a mob, then you gotta make an issue payment ♪ ♪ we going hard, run it back just like it's walter payton ♪ ♪ the game's sweet gave all my -- an occupation ♪ ♪ we so sophisticated so sophisticated ♪ ♪ hundred millionaires guess you made it ♪ ♪ i'm so sophisticated [ bleep ] busting open dolla liquor later ♪ ♪ i her open then i tell her i'ma see her later ♪ ♪ pull out the [ bleep ] and spray that -- just like it's activator ♪ ♪ time to lay down these [ bleep ] who still be masquerading ♪ ♪ we know you [ bleep ] so you got my [ bleep ] masturbating ♪ ♪ round of applause 'cause them choppers be so captivating ♪ ♪ so sophisticated 'cause them hits be calculated ♪ ♪ put yo [ bleep ] in the dirt now you decapitated ♪ ♪ i'm getting money so you'll never hear me talking petty ♪ ♪ tatted on my stomach rich
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forever, makaveli ♪ ♪ $50 million, $100 million it's accumulating ♪ ♪ i'm the hottest and these other [ bleep ] cooling ain't it ♪ ♪ i got a [ bleep ] i'm [ bleep ] that you see on b-e-t ♪ ♪ my lil' haiti shooters will have yo ass on t-m-z ♪ ♪ breaking news and we still get them for ten-a-key ♪ ♪ and if he faking [ bleep ] him, tell them [ bleep ] c'est la vie ♪ ♪ this the mob so you gotta get initiated if you a mob, then you gotta make an issue payment ♪ ♪ we going hard, run it back the game's sweet, gave all my [ bleep ] an occupation ♪ ♪ we so sophisticated ♪ we so sophisticated [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: i want to thank jessica biel, adam richman. apologies to matt damon, we ran out of time. this is the new cd. the album "god forgives, i don't" is out next week. playing us off the air with
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