Skip to main content

tv   Jimmy Kimmel Live  ABC  May 19, 2017 11:35pm-12:37am EDT

11:35 pm
you guys are really cousins. >> really cousins. >> first cousin or second? >> his mother and my father are brother and sister. >> oh, my god. i married my first -- second cousin. >> is that right? >> in north carolina you can do that. anyway. does it bug you that he kind of sends you out to do all that dirty work for him? >> like the pranks? >> the pranks. >> yeah. i don't know, i kind of feel like -- >> he gets to sit back in his comfy chair and orchestrate. it's kind of cowardice. >> yeah, i never really thought of it that way. yeah, but i mean i kind of think of us as a team. like he has the idea to paint my aunt chippy's house and i go out and do it and i'm there and she smacks me around and he laughs. >> yeah. i think somebody from hr might be interested in that. okay. well, thanks for your time, sal. >> yeah, sure. thank you for --
11:36 pm
>> you need to be honest with me. >> okay. >> you and your family. >> dicky: from hollywood it's "jimmy kimmel live"! tonight, zach galifianakis, from "black-ish" tracee ellis ross, senator bill cassidy, and music from logic. and now, guess who, here's jimmy kimmel! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> jimmy: thank you very much. i'm jimmy. i'm the host of the show. thank you for watching. thanks for coming. that's very nice. [ cheers and applause ] you're very kind. thank you. you know, i get it.
11:37 pm
[ cheers and applause ] i will say one week ago tonight i made an emotional speech that was seen by millions, and as a result of my powerful words on that night republicans in congress had second thoughts about repeal and replace. they realized that what is right is right. and i saved health insurance in the united states of america. thank you. [ cheers and applause ] i didn't? i didn't save it? they voted against it anyway? [ laughter ] i really need to pay more attention to the news. i have to say. well, first so many people have asked. our son billy is doing very well. he's getting -- [ cheers and applause ] he's eating. he's getting bigger. he's sleeping well. he can read now, which they say is unusual -- [ laughter ] my wife took a little video of him today. you can see -- he's smiling because so many people donated to children's hospital los angeles. either that or he has gas. we don't know. but what a humbling outpouring of support.
11:38 pm
so many people made donations to chla, and my wife and i are very grateful. our plan is to send a card to everyone who made a donation. there are a lot. so you might be getting those at christmas time. but we got a couple of very generation surprise donations. one from los compadres, which is a group of philanthropic latino donors. that was not a joke. [ laughter ] you nut. and from moose toys, which makes shopkins. they made an exceptional donation after i mentioned we bought shopkins for our daughter jane and told her they were a gift from her baby brother. and then they made this huge donation. so thanks to them. that eight bucks we spent really, really paid off. [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] and thank you for all the supportive messages on twitter and facebook and whatever else there is. there was so much kindness, so much compassion it was hard to even process. but there were also -- and i know this is going to shock you. there were also some not so nice things that people said online about me, including members of the media. now, this is from -- real
11:39 pm
post." "jimmy kimmel's obscene lies about kids and medical care." this is from something called the "washington times." i don't think it's a real newspaper. "shut up, jimmy kimmel, you elitist creep." i cannot count the number of times i've been called an out of touch hollywood elitist creep. which i have to say i kind of appreciate because when i was a kid we had like -- we had to drink the powdered milk because we couldn't afford the liquid. our orange juice came frozen out of a can. it would squeeze out. my father on the rare occasion we took a family trip would hide the dog in the back of the car and then smuggle it into our motel room to avoid paying the $2 pet fee. my dream was to become an out of touch hollywood elitist. and i guess it came true. [ cheers and applause ] it's so crazy. and i would like to apologize for saying that children in america should have health care. it was insensitive. [ laughter ] it was offensive, and i hope you can find it in your heart to forgive me.
11:40 pm
people out there. here's one of them. his name is newt gingrich. he's the former speaker of the house. >> you show up at a hospital with a brand new baby and the brand new baby has a heart problem, the doctors of that hospital do everything they can to save the baby. they don't say we'll take care of the baby right after you write a check. they try to save the baby's life. and that's true across the board in this country. >> jimmy: yes, it is true that if you have an emergency, they will do an operation, and that's terrific if your baby's health problems are all solved during that one visit. the only problem is that never, ever happens. we've had a dozen doctor's appointments since our son had surgery. you've got a cardiologist, a pediatrician. surgeon. some kids need an ambulance to transport them. that doesn't even count the parents who have to miss work for all this stuff. those details newt forgot to mention. i don't know if the double layers of spanx are restricting the blood flow to his brain. [ laughter ] and not only is newt gingrich an expert on sick children, turns out he also knows a thing or two about the late-night comedy business. >> the problem you have with humor in america today -- >> jimmy: okay. yes.
11:41 pm
please tell us the problem we have with humor in america today. >> the problem you have with humor in america today is that hollywood is so enraged at donald trump that they can't be funny. all they've got is pure anger. and that's what's coming out in this stuff. and then they think it must be funny because they're called comedians, so they exhibit their anger as almost a pathology on late-night television. and you're supposed to laugh because after all they're comedians. they ain't funny because they're too angry to be funny. >> jimmy: gee, i wonder why we're so angry. [ laughter ] maybe it has something to do with, i don't know, you. [ laughter ] listen, newt gingrich does know a lot about comedy. this is a man, this is the guy who helped lead the impeachment effort against bill clinton for trying to cover up his affair while he was having an affair. [ laughter ] that is -- that's hilarious. come on. whatever you want to say about him. [ applause ] thank you, newt. there's a reason he's named after a lizard, and that was it. [ laughter ]
11:42 pm
everyone that this is donald trump's doctor. okay? [ laughter ] this is who we chose to handle his health care. of all the doctors in new york, he picked the one who looks like the guy you buy peyote from at burning man. [ laughter ] it's all so cartoonish. maybe the worst person of all is a congressman named raul labrador from idaho. this is from a town hall meeting in lewiston, idaho. this is something he actually said. >> you are mandating people on medicaid accept dying. you are making a mandate. >> no one wants anybody to die. that line is so indefensible. nobody dies because they don't have access to health care. [ town hall crowd erupting ] >> jimmy: and that's a congressman. it's not a garbage man. that's a congressman. now the bill moves from the house to the senate where hopefully some kind of common sense will prevail. one senator, bill cassidy from louisiana who's a republican, came up with a barometer for the health care
11:43 pm
>> could you support a bill that allows insurance companies to cap their payouts to customers? >> as you present that, i ask does it pass the jimmy kimmel test. would a child born with a congenital heart disease be able to get everything she or he would need in that first year of life? i want it to pass the jimmy kimmel test. >> jimmy: i do too. i think that's a good thing. [ cheers and applause ] anyway, bill cassidy is a united states senator for louisiana. he's a doctor. he's a gastroenterologist. he's married to a retired doctor. his wife laura was a surgeon. and he co-founded the greater baton rouge community clinic, which provides free dental care and health care to the working uninsured. obviously this is someone who cares about people's health. and we asked him to join us tonight. and he's with us. thank you for taking time for us, senator cassidy. [ cheers and applause ] >> thank you, jimmy. >> jimmy: also thank you for naming a test after me. i always figured if i ever got a test named after me it would be
11:44 pm
for some embarrassing sexually transmitted disease. [ laughter ] >> don't go there, jimmy. >> jimmy: so much better. so let's talk about health care. my first question is why are the vast majority of republican politicians against making sure americans are truly covered when it comes to health care? >> if you take the most prominent republican politician, donald trump, he has said that he actually wants all to be covered, he wants to take care of pre-existing conditions without mandates, americans hate mandates, and lastly, maybe most importantly, he wants to lower premiums. right now families have premiums $20,000, $30,000, almost $40,000 a year with $6,000 to $13,000 family deductibles. now, a middle-class family can't afford that. we have got to have insurance that passes the jimmy kimmel test. but a middle-class family can no longer afford. >> jimmy: do you believe that this health care, the health care bill they passed, does that? lowers those costs for middle-class people?
11:45 pm
>> the house plan was scored by the congressional budget office as actually raising premiums, which is why on the senate side we need to make it work because we have to lower those premiums so that if another child is born that child can get the care she needs, not only on the first year but every year thereafter as you mentioned so well. >> jimmy: the clinic you co-founded caters to the working uninsured. why is there even such a thing as working uninsured in the united states? should there be? >> no, there shouldn't be. on the other hand, you have to have a health care program that not only works for the patient but works for the taxpayer. our country is spending so much money right now on health care, i am all about people having the insurance they need. but again, we have to be able to afford it both in our taxes and in our personal expenses. that's the intention. that's the goal. and frankly i think that's president trump's goal too. >> jimmy: do you believe that every american, regardless of income, should be able to get regular checkups, maternity care, et cetera, all of those things that people who have health car
11:46 pm
>> yep. >> jimmy: you do. where do you stand on the annual or lifetime payout caps where the insurance companies cap how much money they can pay out so that when a family has a child with a condition like my son has, they potentially could go bankrupt because of all the expensive surgeries? >> yeah, as it turns out, the caps don't contribute -- having a cap does not contribute that much to the expense. you can eliminate that cap and it does not really impact, it does not really impact the cost of the policy. it does to an extent but not to such an extent that you have to have them. >> jimmy: will the senate make sure that the millions of children who count on medicaid don't lose access to medical care because this house bill would cut they say $888 billion mostly to benefit wealthy americans? >> let me first answer your question technically, then more broadly, and then more broadly yet. most children are covered under the chip program, and so they are going to get the coverage they need. it's almost independent from medicaid. under medicaid itself, t
11:47 pm
clearly if we're going to fulfill president trump's kind of contract with the american people, that people would maintain their coverage, medicaid will be a part of that. from my perspective i'd rather medicaid change into something that works more for the patient as opposed to the state or the institution, which too often takes the money and doesn't give it to the patient for their care. and then most broadly we will get there if the american people call their senator and if they call their senator who's a democrat and say listen, don't just sit on the sidelines, engage, don't wait to be called, you call, call your republican senator, say we've got to fulfill president trump's contract lowering premiums with coverage that passes the jimmy kimmel test, if we do that we get an american plan, not democrat, not republican, an american plan and that's where we need to be. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: senator, since you mentioned this test, since i am jimmy kimmel i would like to make a suggestion as to what the jimmy kimmel test should be. i'll keep it simple. the jimmy kimmel test i think
11:48 pm
denied medical care, emergency or otherwise, because they can't afford it. can that be the jimmy kimmel test, as simple as that? [ cheers and applause ] that is over simplifying it? >> hey, man, you're on the right track. and if that's as close as we get that works great in government. we've got to be able to pay for it. and that's the challenge. so all those middle-class families right now paying $20,000, $30,000, $40,000 a year for their coverage, we have to make it affordable for them too. and that's what i'm hearing -- >> jimmy: well, i can think of a way to pay for it is don't give a huge tax cut to millionaires like me and instead leave it how it is. [ cheers and applause ] that would be one way. that's my vote. >> tell the american people to call their senator and endorse that concept. >> that's a good plan. thank you, senator. i trust you to keep your word and do whatever you can to make sure those who need help are able to get it. that's senator bill cassidy from louisiana. we're going to take a break. when we come back, we'll have a specia
11:49 pm
"lie witness news." stick around. we'll be right back. [ cheers and applause ] we, the entertainment-loving people, want all our rooms to be tv rooms. because those are the best rooms. because they have tvs in them. and, when we're not in those rooms, we want our shows to go with us. anywhere? you got that right, kid show thing. get a directv all-included package for 4 rooms. only $25 a month, price guaranteed for 2 years. available for at&t unlimited plus customers. you totanobody's hurt, new car. but there will still be pain. it comes when your insurance company says they'll only pay three-quarters of what it takes to replace it. what are you supposed to do? drive three-quarters of a car? now if you had liberty mutual new car replacement™, you'd get your whole car back. i guess they don't want you driving around on three wheels.
11:50 pm
with liberty mutual new car replacement™, 'll replace the full lue of your car. liberty stands with you™. liberty mutual insurance. ♪ music volume rises ] you guys wanna go? ♪ ♪ [whistles] get all summer essentials 30, 40, and 50 percent off. hi, fashion. old navy "for great skin, you don't have ...just go to bed." new aveeno®... ...positively radiant® overnight facial. get the benefits of a spa facial... ...overnight. aveeno®. "naturally beautiful results®" rumor confirmed. they're playing. -what? -we gotta go. -where? -san francisco.
11:51 pm
-when? -friday. we gotta go. [ tires screech ] any airline. any hotel. any time. go where you want, when you want with no blackout dates. [ muffled music coming from club. "blue monday" by new order. cheers. ] [ music and cheers get louder ] the travel rewards credit card from bank of america. it's travel, better connected. the travel rewards credit card from bank of america. it's theat olive gardenver introducing new giant stuffed pastas starting at $12.99. pastas so big you could share them, but so delicious, you won't want to. giant stuffed pastas. for a limited time at olive garden. othe newly advanced gle can i'm csee in your blind spot. [ dinosaur roars ] onboard cameras and radar can detect danger all around you. driver assist systems can pull you back into your lane, if drifting. bye chief. bye bobby. and will even help you brake, if necessary.
11:52 pm
lease the gle 350 for $579 a month at your local mercedes-benz dealer. mercedes-benz. the best or nothing. todof the chevy silverado ring the roll-formed steel bed to the aluminum bed of this competitor's truck. awesome. yeah! first, let's check out the aluminum bed of this truck. wooooow!! holy moly. full on crack here. now let's check out the steel bed of the silverado. i'd expect more dents. no holes. current qualified lessees can get this silverado all star edition for around $249 a month. plus, find your tag and get an additional $1,500 lease cash on select silverado pickups in stock. find new roads at your local chevy dealer.
11:53 pm
>> jimmy: welcome back to the show. zach galifianakis, tracey ellis ross and music from logic. i mentioned earlier house of representatives on thursday pass what'd they call the american health care act, also known as trumpcare. it's a hot-button issue. people have strong opinions on this subject. even if they know little to none of the details of the subject. so this afternoon we went out on the street, we asked people who claim to be in favor of the new gop health care plan about a bunch of provisions we totally made up in tonight's "know your health care" edition of "lie witness news." >> we're talking to people about
11:54 pm
obamacare and replacing it with trumpcare. did you vote for trumpcare? >> yes. >> you must be very excited. >> i am. you know, a lot of people are taking advantage of the system. so i believe that maybe this is going to stop that. i'm not sure. because i'm not a politician. >> how do you feel about the provision that is going to allow veterinarians to do surgery on uninsured people? they're doctors. >> i'm all for the veterinarians. [ laughter ] i think it should happen. >> would you let a veterinarian operate on you? >> of course. like you said, they're doctors. >> we're talking about trump care replacing obamacare. did you vote for trump care? >> i did vote for trump. >> let's talk about the bill's provision replacing ambulances with uber emt. >> okay. >> a lot more drivers on the road, obviously. time is of the essence. doesn't really matter who drives. >> yeah. long as you get to the hospital quick, reliable. i think that can be provided by regular people.
11:55 pm
>> i'd be in for that. >> repeal and replace or repeal, rinse and repeat? >> repeal rinse and repeat. >> if a poor person can't afford a heart transplant, congress has set aside affordable horse hearts which are nearly legal. >> i agree with that because if human beings are donating organs and horse hearts are going to do the job, why not? and it's affordable. >> what do you think of the trump care provision where the government will pay to you stitch up your own wounds at home using youtube tutorial videos? >> i don't think there's anything wrong with that. it's about time americans did a little bit for themselves. what's wrong with that? i cut myself earlier today. i put 11 stitches in my finger. am i complaining to you? no. >> how'd you do that? >> with a needle and thread. next. >> what did you think when you heard about the provision that poor people can pay for their health care by donating an organ like a kidney or a liver? >> honestly, there's good and bad to both -- to everything
11:56 pm
sometimes you just have to cut and dry and do what you've got to do to make ends meet. >> you've got to sell a kidney to pay your health insurance, you've got to sell a kidney. >> you only need one to live. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: cut and it dry it, delicious. tonight on the show we have music from logic, from "black-ish" tracey ellis ross is here. and we will be right back with zach galifianakis. so stick around. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ how do you become america's best-selling brand? you make it detect what they don't. stop, stop, stop! sorry. you make it sense what's coming. watch, watch, watch! mom. relax! i'm relaxed. you make it for 16-year olds... whoa-whoa-whoa!!! and the parents who worry about them. you saw him, right? going further to help make drivers, better drivers. don't freak out on me. that's ford. and that's how you become america's best-selling brand. thof how q got curly.
11:57 pm
curls. curly fries. curly straws. curly haired dogs. even those cute curly tails on pigs. but to quin's chagrin everything about her was so very straight. which made the next twist so amazing. did she expect to find a high-end hair curler at a mind-bendingly low price? never. but that's the beauty of a store full of surprises. you never know what you're gonna find, but you know you're gonna love it. marshalls. your surprise is waiting. [ sighs ] hey, i was using that. what, you think we own stock in the electric company? i will turn this car around right now! there's nobody back there. i was becoming my father. [ clears throat ] it's...been an adjustment, but we're making it work.
11:58 pm
you know, progressive.com makes it easy for us to get the right home insurance. [ snoring ] progressive can't protect you from becoming your parents, but we can protect your home and auto. [ chuckles ] all right.
11:59 pm
i am totally blind. i lost my sight in afghanistan. if you're totally blind, you may also be struggling with non-24. calling 844-844-2424. or visit my24info.com. ♪
12:00 am
when you have doctors working as a team for your health, you get the care you need to help you thrive. ♪ visit kp.org to learn more. kaiser permanente. thrive. ♪
12:01 am
>> jimmy: welcome back. tonight from "black-ish" here on abc, tracey ellis ross will be with us. and then this is his new album. it's called "everybody." logic from the mercedes-benz outdoor stage. [ cheers and applause ] tomorrow danny mcbride will be here, priyanka chopra will join us, and we'll have music from
12:02 am
royal blood, and later this week billy crudup, ewan mcgregor, ariel winter, katie lowes plus music from wale featuring g-eazy and at the drive-in too. i also want to thank my friends will arnett, anthony anderson, kristen bell, and david spade for filling in for me last week. [ cheers and applause ] i owe you guys at least a ride to l.a.x. maybe even a pickup at l.a.x. guillermo, of all the guest hosts which one was your favorite? and be honest. they're not here. don't worry. >> guillermo: jimmy, all of them did real good. >> jimmy: but which one did you like best? >> guillermo: jimmy, you know i like women, so kristen bell. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: yes, i do know you like women. i didn't know you like women. you like women? >> guillermo: all the time. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: our first guest tonight is a good man. he's a funny man, and he is a clown too, of the rodeo variety which is explained in great detail on his ridiculous show "baskets." you can watch it on fx, and please say hello to zach galifianakis.
12:03 am
[ cheers and applause ] ♪ i appreciate your being here because it was a little -- you were here, you were prepared to be guest host if i couldn't come back to work. >> yeah. i thought i was hosting tonight. >> jimmy: oh, no. [ laughter ] >> so this is a little weird. >> jimmy: the word didn't get to you -- >> no. i thought i was going to be sitting there. >> jimmy: oh, i'm so sorry. >> it's okay. it's fine. >> jimmy: is it a problem? >> no, no. everything's fine. everything's good. i just -- i just love show business so much. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: you do. i notice that about you. you love the business of show business. >> love the business. >> jimmy: more than anyone i know. >> i get that "variety" every morning, "hollywood reporter." i cannot stop reading it. >> jimmy: how are you doing? >> oh, [ bleep ]. left cbs? [ laughter ]
12:04 am
>> jimmy: is life good? how's it going? everything all right? >> life is good. how are you, jimmy? >> jimmy: i'm doing good, thank you. >> my heart has been going out to you, and i just wanted to say that. >> jimmy: i appreciate that. you've been very nice. you sent me some very nice notes, and that's very kind of you. [ cheers and applause ] >> but i think all this pre-existing stuff i think that you're talking about is very important, and i applaud you for it for sure. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: oh, well, yeah. it is important. thank you for saying that. >> all joking aside. >> jimmy: well, thank you for saying that. i appreciate that. >> yeah. >> jimmy: have you ever had a situation like that with family or whatever? >> yeah, i would personally not qualify because i have a lot of pre-existing conditions. >> jimmy: you do? >> yes. i have something called cocaine toenail. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: you have cocaine toenail? >> yeah. >> jimmy: wow. >> i have something called smurf hands. i have something called edhd, which is called -- stands for ellen degeneres hip dysplasia. [ laughter ]
12:05 am
it's where you can't stop dancing for 45 minutes. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: i'm so sorry. i didn't know you had edhd. >> i have athlete's foot of the midsection. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: i actually have that one too. >> yeah. make sure i said them all. >> jimmy: you're reading through your medical records? >> oh, yeah. i have cottage cheese ankles. >> jimmy: oh, no. >> parking meter head. do you know what that is? >> jimmy: no, i don't. >> just a small body, large head. [ laughter ] and i've also been diagnosed with boutros-boutros ghali and ban-ki moon. >> jimmy: what? oh my god, that's the worst. well. i'm sorry i made you bring that up on television. let switch. how are your children? you have two sins. irvin and kareem. how are they doing? >> they're good. there's no -- [ laughter ] >> jimmy: how old are they now? >> i don't know, jimmy. >> jimmy: you don't know. >> i don't know. >> jimmy: how old do they look when you size them up? do ty
12:06 am
[ laughter ] he's only 3. no, it's fun to have kids because you know, as a father you get to experience all these great things that they say. >> jimmy: yeah. >> i was telling one of your producers that during the election, not to be political, but during the election i made my son some pancakes and he was 2 at the time. he's eating some pancakes. 6:30 in the morning. eating pancakes. and he says to himself, and i remember it verbatim. "certainly if donald trump becomes president he'll take away our pancakes. crazy, crazy, crazy." [ laughter ] and i just looked at him and i go, "oh, it's going to be much worse than that." [ laughter ] >> jimmy: wow. that's pretty -- that's very precocious. and your son is using a knife at 2 years old? >> it's a -- you know what the spork is? >> jimmy: yeah. >> this is a spife. [ la
12:07 am
terrible invention. >> jimmy: we've got to get you on "shark tank." >> yeah, yeah. what's that? i know what it is. >> jimmy: when you first -- you'll read about it in "variety." when you moved down, you moved to l.a., you lived right like three doors down the street, right down the block from us here. >> yes. >> jimmy: at the wax museum, right? >> i was at the wax museum. [ laughter ] no, when i first got here i moved into the hollywood youth hostel. have you ever been? >> jimmy: i have been there, yes. >> it's nice. [ laughter ] if you like the combination smell of febreze and farts. [ laughter ] but yeah, i remember staying there for a few -- maybe a couple weeks. i didn't know -- when you're in a youth hostel you have forced roommates. >> jimmy: right. yeah. >> they were just german students who were wearing nothing but tighty whities, or in this case, loosy brownies. [ laughter ]
12:08 am
that was for jimmy only. guys, i'm doing it for jimmy! [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] he's had a tough time! it's not about you! i'm making [ bleep ] jokes for jimmy! >> jimmy: that's actually the name of my foundation. zach galifianakis is here. we'll be right back. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ do it for me, as a family. sh is for you to love, grandpa. ♪ let us be lovers, we'll marry our fortunes together ♪ older grandaughter: it'll be alright. i know. grandson: how did you meet grandpa? grandmother: actually on a blind date. [ laughter ] i wish he was on the trip with us. he's sitting right between the boys in the back of the car. [ laughter ] ♪ america ♪ all come to look for america
12:09 am
♪ all come to look for america life's as big as you make it. the all-new 7-seater volkswagen atlas with america's best bumper-to-bumper limited warranty. everyday, millions of you walk through our front doors. and you inspired our new flavors. introducing mcdonald's signature crafted recipes. sweet barbecue bacon made with crispy onions. pico guacamole made with real hass avocados. maple bacon dijon with thick-cut applewood smoked bacon. purchase any signature crafted recipe sandwich and use the mcdonald's app to get a free medium fries and soft drink. you bring your flavor to the world... we bring ours to you.
12:10 am
♪ depression is a tangle of multiple symptoms. ♪ that's why there's trintellix, a prescription medication for depression. trintellix may help you take a step forward in improving your depression. tell your healthcare professional right away if your depression worsens, or you have unusual changes in mood, behavior or thoughts of suicide. antidepressants can increase these in children, teens and young adults. do not take with maois. tell your healthcare professional about your medications, including migraine, psychiatric and depression medications, to avoid a potentially life-threatening condition. increased risk of bleeding or bruising may occur,
12:11 am
especially if taken with nsaid pain relievers, aspirin or blood thinners. manic episodes or vision problems may occur in some people. may cause low sodium levels. the most common side effects were nausea, constipation and vomiting. trintellix had no significant impact on weight in clinical trials. ask your healthcare professional about trintellix. (cat meows) ♪ (snap) ♪ (cat meows) sheba® perfect portions™. what cats want™ for all kinds of things... like walking.ewarded hey, honey. dad, where's the car? thought we'd walk. he's counting steps. walk, move and earn money... goal! dad... hey, we wanna welcome everyone to the father daughter dance. look at this dad, he's got some moves! money you can use on out-of-pocket medical expenses.
12:12 am
he's ok, yeah! unitedhealthcare ok google, foxygen's latest album is hang.? foxygen, eh? you listen to hang yet? yea. cool. is he gone?
12:13 am
todof the chevy silverado ring the roll-formed steel bed to the aluminum bed of this competitor's truck. awesome. yeah! first, let's check out the aluminum bed of this truck. wooooow!! holy moly. full on crack here. now let's check out the steel bed of the silverado. i'd expect more dents. no holes. current qualified lessees can get this silverado all star edition for around $249 a month. plus, find your tag and get an additional $1,500 lease cash on select silverado pickups in stock. find new roads at your local chevy dealer.
12:14 am
you're not his brother or cousin or -- >> no. no relation. >> no relation. you can kind of let me know the real deal with mr. kimmel. you know, everybody in this business likes to prank people for some reason. like it's a big summer camp. >> yeah. i get that a lot. >> from jimmy. >> yeah. >> what does he rib you about? >> my height is the theme. >> he makes height jokes. >> yeah, a lot of height jokes. >> why? >> because i'm short. >> i don't find you that short. let me see. >> i'm short. [ laughter ] >> tell me about that. >> jimmy arranged to have the plates of my car changed to this. [ laughter ] >> that's just sick. >> yeah. that's right. >> you ever want to get violent with jimmy? >> no. >> maybe like punch him in the
12:15 am
>> no. never came up. >> maybe head-butt him in the test-icicles? [ laughter ] >> no. >> you're making a good living. you don't find it to put food on the table for your family. >> no. >> i mean like reaching. [ laughter ] but on a personal note, can you ride roller coasters? [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: i like that show. >> he's shorter than i am. >> jimmy: he's more than an inch shorter than you are. come on. that's our miniature co-executive producer jason who -- yes, that is true, did i have his license -- [ applause ] >> where is he? oh, there he is. >> jimmy: are you on a box or something? >> are those your ace frehley boots? [ laughter ] >> jimmy: just what he needed, two of us. >> hey, i'm doing this short film. would you like to -- [ laughter ]
12:16 am
>> jimmy: by the way, today -- >> can i just say? i see myself in the monitor. i look like steve bannon's nephew. [ laughter ] it is not a good look. it's not a good look. >> jimmy: do you think steve bannon has nephews? can't imagine him being someone's uncle steve. >> i know he doesn't have a heart. >> jimmy: by the way, congratulations, "baskets," which is a show that i love -- [ cheers and applause ] has -- and i know that's why you're really here tonight. >> promotion. >> jimmy: is to promote a show that has no air date yet. but the show was picked up. how do you learn -- i know you're a little bit -- you're a little bit off the grid, if you will. you know, you're not that available. you're not online that much. >> not tuned in. >> jimmy: not tuned in. how do you find a show like that when it's picked up. who tells you? >> i'm just now finding out right now. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: oh, you are? >> i've seen billboards around town. i'll read the "hollywood reporter."
12:17 am
you know. >> a guy like me, jimmy, i have a lot of projects. >> jimmy: you do. >> it's not just about acting. >> jimmy: what are some of the other projects you're working on? >> i'm a businessman. i have this vin diesel perfume that i'm working on. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: it smells like vin diesel? >> yeah. smells just like vin diesel. >> jimmy: i love that. what's it called? >> diesel. [ laughter ] it's actually called unleaded. [ laughter ] so i work on that. i manage the band logic. >> jimmy: i didn't know you manage logic. >> really happy about being on the mercedes-benz stage. >> jimmy: yeah, right. did you sell that sponsorship? >> yeah. i just need you to say it a couple more times. because he was on the ford focus stage but we got him up to the mercedes-benz stage. >> jimmy: things are look up. well, congratulations. [ cheers and applause ] >> thank you. >> jimmy: zach galifianakis, everybody. we'll be right back with tracey ellis ross.
12:18 am
12:19 am
my belly pain i could build a small city with all the over-the-counter products i've used. enough! i've tried enough laxatives to cover the eastern seaboard. i've climbed a mount everest of fiber. probiotics? enough! (avo) if you've had enough, tell your doctor what you've tried and how long you've been at it. linzess works differently from laxatives. linzess treats adults with ibs with constipation or chronic constipation. it can help relieve your belly pain, and lets you have more frequent and complete bowel movements that are easier to pass. do not give linzess to children less than six, and it should not be given to children six to less than eighteen. it may harm them. don't take linzess if you have a bowel blockage. get immediate help if you develop unusual or severe stomach pain, especially with bloody or black stools. the most common side effect is diarrhea, sometimes severe.
12:20 am
and call your doctor right away. other side effects include gas, stomach-area pain and swelling. talk to your doctor about managing your symptoms proactively with linzess. ♪ now look what you made me do♪o ♪ bringing new moves to the old school ♪ ♪ time for the whole world to enjoy the view ♪ ♪ we can go left they can go right ♪ ♪ save me a dance for the end of the night ♪ ♪ when i'm with you it's a party ♪ ♪ don't care where we're going ♪ ♪ 1, 2, 3 get loose no♪! ♪ it takes two to make a thing go right♪ ♪ it takes two to make it out of sight. ♪ home of jack daniel's. a small town with big dreams of having their own... nba team. what? ♪ we know it's not the most exciting place in the world.
12:21 am
and while we're not exactly known for our abilities on the court, we do know a thing or two about developing a franchise. jack daniel's -- the most exciting thing about lynchburg, tennessee... for now. digiorno?most exciting thing about lynchburg, tennessee... ♪ rise to the occasion. it's not delivery. it's digiorno. you totanobody's hurt, new car. but there will still be pain. it comes when your insurance company says they'll only pay three-quarters of what it takes to replace it. what are you supposed to do? drive three-quarters of a car? now if you had liberty mutual new car replacement™, you'd get your whole car back. i guess they don't want you driving around on three wheels. smart. with liberty mutual new car replacement™, 'll replace the full lue of your car. liberty stands with you™. liberty mutual insurance.
12:22 am
to take on the "tom insurance companies and the credit card companies and the wall street banks... that's what tom perriello is about." progressive causes have been my life's work. i'm tom perriello... and before and after congress i led non-profits to battle climate change, poverty and president bush's attacks on civil rights. now i'm running for governor to reduce economic inequality. because together, we really can build a virginia that works for everyone. >> jimmy: cleto on saxophone. our next guest is a very talented actress and a fun person too.
12:23 am
star of "black-ish." the season finale airs wednesday night here on abc. please welcome tracee ellis ross. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> hi. >> jimmy: you look fantastic. >> thank you. >> jimmy: you were at that met ball, right? >> i went to the met ball. >> jimmy: and is that a lot of pressure as far as what you're going to wear? >> what you're going to wear and the actual -- it's terrifying, yes. >> jimmy: do you get to decide what you're going to wear? is there some designer that cooks something up for and you says here it is? >> i went with the company far-fetched, the online shopping. and they sell comme des garcons. and the designer that was being honored was rei kawakubo. she's very avant garde. art meets fashion. and i got to wear a comme des garcons. >> jimmy: is that a big deal?
12:24 am
it's a big deal in fashion and it was a huge deal for me. i feel look my mom taught me about glamour and up i was a big fashion girl, loved magazines, loved that world. it was something -- it's a very big deal. >> jimmy: i think most men can't relate to that. i guess the closest would be like putting on tom brady's super bowl jersey. [ laughter ] >> maybe. but anthony and kenya, they love wearing a special sneaker. it's like a big deal to get the jordans or -- >> jimmy: that's right, sneakers are a big deal. >> it would be matching up to that, but yes, a very big deal. the red carpet is sort of like the oscars times ten because it's just about sort of the red carpet and the fashion moment. >> jimmy: right. there's not even a door at the d. you just turn around and go back. >> that's it. you're done. kind of. kind of. and you know, the red carpet is really genuinely -- i love taking pictures. i love being in front of people. but a red carpet in essence is people taking your picture to judge you. >> jimmy: sure it is. >> that's really what it is. >> jimmy: and it's even stranger when you're wearing someone
12:25 am
judging something you really had nothing to do with. [ cheers and applause ] wait a minute. what are you wearing? >> exactly. that is basically a piece of wearable art. by comme des garcons. >> jimmy: no. >> yes, jimmy. yes, jimmy. ask your wife. but as you can tell, there was not a lot of movement i could do in the dress. >> jimmy: yeah, right. >> so it was a little bit like couldn't lift my arms up, couldn't hug people because if i lifted my arms too high the dress would come up. and if you can't hug people and you can't lean in, like kissing like -- it was a little bit -- >> jimmy: so in other words, everything you want in a piece of clothing. [ laughter ] >> everything you want from clothing. but like when i was sitting down if someone came -- try to shake my hand. >> jimmy: okay. >> i couldn't get far. >> jimmy: it was as if you were at disneyland dressed as mickey mouse without the head. >> stand up. you go in for the two kisses. i would do this and this. >> jimmy: like hockey or something. really. wow. and that was an honor to be dressed --
12:26 am
[ cheers and applause ] it was an honor. >> jimmy: at a certain point -- is comme des garcons a person? or a company? >> rei kawakubo is the designer of comme des garcons. >> jimmy: i'm going to contact rey, we're going to work out a scheme where we come up with ridiculous things and try to get famous people to wear them. i think you might have been wearing it. i'm going to put somebody in a big sprite bottle or something. see what they do. >> it was pretty amazing. it's very pressured. it's a very pressured scenario. >> jimmy: did you watch your friend, your tv husband anthony anderson, filled in for me last week. did you watch him fill in? oh, you did not. so you're not a supportive tv wife. >> i don't watch anything he does. no, i'm joking. i did not see it. i was in new york. >> jimmy: listen, that's fine with me. >> i looked clips up. >> jimmy: you did. and did you review his performance? or did you -- >> i think anthony's always amazing. >> jimmy: he is always amazing. >> and i also watched kristen bell. now, that i did catch.
12:27 am
>> jimmy: oh, so you did not watch anthony but you did -- >> i'm being honest. it wasn't on purpose. [ laughter ] i'm never going to hear the end of this. it wasn't on purpose. >> jimmy: wow, how about that? anthony's mother was here. she showed up. do you know her well? i'm sure he she comes to the set a lot. >> she's my tv mother-in-law. >> jimmy: but do you get in there with her with doris his mother? i know her pretty well. >> i think you know her better than me. you have a longer span of relationship because you guys have been friends for a lot longer than anthony and i have been friends. >> jimmy: a long time. and also i think anthony reached a point where he had had enough of bringing his mother to work. i think. he used to bring her here all the time. >> she's at work all the time. >> jimmy: oh, she is at work -- >> she comes to work and he usually doesn't know when she's coming. >> jimmy: oh, she just shows up? >> can you imagine if my mom did that? >> jimmy: tracee's mom is diana ross. that would be something. [ cheers and applause ] >> if my mom just showed up. that would honestly be -- i think that would totally -- >> jimmy: we have a little surprise for you. tracee? [
12:28 am
>> i knew i couldn't get my mom on the phone. >> jimmy: we've got mother's day coming up. do you get anthony's mom something for mother's day since you are technically her tv daughter-in-law? >> sure. we have planned a whole thing. >> jimmy: you know she's going to demand something. if she hears even a whiff. get her one of those comme des garcons dresses. >> i should get her one in blue like that. >> jimmy: get her that one. they can't use that again, right? >> he doesn't even say wear that again. he says use that again. that's a stunning piece of art i was wearing. >> jimmy: it is stunning. you definitely stunned me. [ laughter ] [ applause ] no, i loved it. i like this better. >> do you know what the main expression people do at the met ball? i swear to god. it's like this. hey! oh, where's the camera? hey! [ laughter ] and you're like, oh, my god, did
12:29 am
they love what i have on and they were jealous? or what was the deal? >> jimmy: i know. it's a little weird. well, it's great to see you. and the show is so great. [ cheers and applause ] the season finale on wednesday night, "black-ish." tracee ellis ross. 9:30 here on nbc. we'll be right back with logic. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> announcer: the "jimmy kimmel live" concert series is presented by mercedes-benz. the best or nothing.
12:30 am
12:31 am
>> dicky: the "jimmy kimmel live" concert series is presented by mercedes-benz. the best or nothing. >> jimmy: i want to thank zach galifianakis, tracee ellis ross, senator bill cassidy and apologies to matt damon. we ran out of time. "nightline" is next. but first, this is his new album "everybody." here with the song "black spider-man" with help from damian lemar hudson, logic! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> hey. we made it. this is crazy. i want to take this awkward moment as the music is going just to shout out all my fans. rat pack, thank you so much. i love you guys. [ cheers and applause ] man, this album is the fight for equality of all men, women, and child regardless of race,
12:32 am
sexual orientation. guillermo! i just want to have some fun. come on. join me. sing along. ♪ i been feeling so down i think they should know now i think they should know what's up ♪ ♪ that's that road i been down i know how it go down i know how it go now what's up ♪ ♪ i feel like i don't belong i feel like my life is wrong i feel like i don't know what's up ♪ ♪ what's up what's up yeah yeah ♪ ♪ here we go ♪ i ain't here to pick and choose i ain't here to sing the blues ♪ ♪ i'm just here to spread the clues i'm just here to spread the news everybody know i do ♪ ♪ listen i ain't ashamed to be white i ain't ashamed to be black ♪ ♪ i ain't ashamed of my beautiful mexican wife as a matter of fact i know you with that ♪ ♪ and i'm not scared of the people who tell me i should be do what you love and don't ever wonder ♪ ♪ what it could be everybody from my hood everybody know i'm misunderstood ♪ ♪ but that's just the uneducated that never related and feel like i'm fading off they feel like
12:33 am
i'm right out my mind tell 'em ♪ ♪ momma don't love me daddy don't love me wonder why i drown in the bubbly ♪ ♪ you could be anything you wanna be except the person you don't wanna be ♪ ♪ let him hate let em love wondering if everybody still like this up above ♪ ♪ when that push come to shove make me wanna pull up with the with the gat in the glove like ♪ ♪ i just wanna be free not a slave to the stereotype all alone in my room in the middle of the night ♪ ♪ i don't have the words but my stereo might i don't want to be i don't want to be ♪ ♪ i just want to be a man today i don't want to be a christian muslim gay straight or bi see you later bye ♪ ♪ not perceived by the things i believe or the color of my skin ♪ ♪ or the fact i'm attracted to her maybe him ♪ ♪ or the fact i'm a single mother living all alone looking for a man and a home to call my own ♪ ♪ but i already have one the only man i'm ever need is my son my son my son my son son say ♪ ♪ black is beautiful black is beautiful be black and proud be black and proud ♪ ♪ everybody hatin on me right now i'm black and proud black and proud ♪ ♪ i'm just as white as that mona lisa i'm just as black as my cousin keisha ♪ ♪ i'm biracial so bye felicia praise black jesus now call the preacher ♪ ♪ maybe jesus was black maybe jesus had dreads spiderman should be black i vote for
12:34 am
glover instead ♪ ♪ glover instead los angeles, california how are you doing! [ cheers and applause ] sing it if you know it! put your hands in the air right now. as loud as you can. to the back. let's go! ♪ i been feeling so down i think they should know now i think they should know what's up ♪ ♪ that's that road i been down i know how it go down i know how it go now what's up ♪ ♪ i feel like i don't belong i feel like my life is wrong ♪ ♪ i feel like i don't know what's up what's up what's up ♪ ♪ go on and let your soul glow let your soul glow glow ♪ ♪ ooh ooh ooh shine and glow let it glow glow ooh ooh ♪
12:35 am
♪ come on let's go ♪ glow ♪ get it come on ♪ glow ♪ ♪ ♪ king it here we go ♪ black spiderman can you save a brother now black spiderman can you save a brother now ♪
12:36 am
your soul glow glow ♪ ♪ >> thank you guys so much. i love my wife jessica. i love you. swag. thank you, guys. this is the bomb. this is crazy. swag. [ cheers and applause ]
12:37 am
this is "nightline." >> tonight, digital addiction? >> josh has been in his room since 4:00, nearly five hours, gaming. >> a teen obsessed with video games. skipping school. and a father who spends so much time playing in the basement, he often misses family gatherings. >> i was going to bed as a newlywed, and he was staying up and playing video games. >> part of a growing 91 of people seeking rehab for device detox. how they're getting snapped back to reality. plus, peaking out. >> my cat's name is j. allen cooper. >> fandom in the streets for the ground-breaking whodunit series "twin peaks." >> two more pieces of this incredible pie. >> with the cast. >> happy that i'm back in a suit for god's sake. >> along with

86 Views

info Stream Only

Uploaded by TV Archive on