"mean tweets country music edition" -- >> dicky: from hollywood it's "jimmy kimmel live"! tonight -- dax shepard. from "grey's anatomy" jesse williams. "mean tweets country music edition" -- and music from luke combs. and now, stay focused -- here's jimmy kimmel! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> jimmy: very nice. hi, i'm jimmy. i'm the host of the show. thank you for watching. thanks to all of you for coming.

to those of you who are joining us following the cma awards tonight on abc, it's country music's biggest night. the cmas if you don't know are kind of like the vmas with bit clothes. the singers have clothes on and they sing also. did you know, this is interesting, did you know that if your first name is kenny or keith, you are legally required to go into country music? it's true. [ laughter ] one guy got arrested, you know. we have some country music for you tonight from luke combs. luke was both a presenter and a nominee at the cma awards tonight. [ cheers and applause ] this is interesting. the moment luke got out of the show we loaded him into a rocket, a real rocket, we fired it from nashville. 12 minutes later it landed in the ocean next to the santa monica pier. we put him in a car. the car took almost three hours to get here from santa monica. [ laughter ] the rocket was fast and luke is here for the show tonight. thank you for providing us that.

brand-new country music edition of "mean tweets" if you're into that sort of thing. tweets are about to get meaner. thank you very much. twitter, you know, just today, they doubled the amount of characters you can use from 140 to 280 characters. i think means twitter is now facebook, right? [ laughter ] they're basically the same thing wrar is it possible there is anyone on the planet who thought, you know what this year needs? more twitter. someone did, i guess. i don't know, president trump is either going to have to quit twitter or someone is did to have to teach him more words. [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] i know it sounds crazy but i think i'm going to miss the way trump would post a tweet that ended with dot dot dot and we'd have to wait 23 minutes to see what the rest of his angry sentence was going to be. [ laughter ] now all that drama is gone. kind of awesome twitter decided to double the character limit on the same day trump arrived in ch

earth where it is illegal to use twitter. [ cheers and applause ] his little thumbs must be going wild. today is the one-year anniversary of donald trump becoming president. [ audience moaning ] >> jimmy: no, no clapping at all, all right. one person's happy. one year ago today donald trump been the election and our hearts. [ laughter ] and his opponent, hillary clinton, spent the day quietly at home today violently strangling her mailman. [ laughter ] so much has happened over the past year. not in congress, nothing that is happened there. but whether you love president trump or hate him, there's one thing we can all agree on, that is he looks absolutely great in a pair of shorts. [ cheers and applause ] i mean, back away, ladies. that all belongs to melania. i mentioned that the president is in china right now. he's there shooting an episode of "undercover boss" at his neck tie factory. trump and his wife, there they are, ty

today. they got off of air force one. he grabbed her by the hand. look at all the kids. the group, look at how excited these kids are. they're not jumping up and down for trump, they've just never seen a chevy tahoe before. [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] i'll tell you, the president of china pulled out all the stops. they gave trump the first-ever dinner for a foreign leader in the forbidden city, which i guess is a big deal. they took him to what they called a traditional chinese opera. look at this. there are the trumps. okay. this has to be a prank, right? i mean, i know he's said some crazy stuff about china but the guy flies in from washington, you make him sit through birthday clowns banging on pots? trump also made a speech in china today. have to say he really does seem to have a way of winning them

china to rape our country. and that's what they're doing. >> jimmy: wait, i think that was the wrong clip. [ laughter ] anyway, it went well. went fine in china. trump gave a major foreign policy speech yesterday in south korea. during which he described living in north korea as "a hell no person deserves" and warned north korea not to try us. that's right, don't try us. if you do, you're going to like us. [ laughter ] but trump opened his remarks by praising some of south korea's many contributions to world culture. >> korean golfers are some of the best on earth. in fact, and you know what i'm going to say. >> jimmy: no, we don't. [ laughter ] we don't. we literally never know what you're going to say. [ cheers and applause ] sometimes no

what you're going to say. but go on, say it. >> the women's u.s. open was held this year at trump national golf club in bedminister, new jersey. and it just happened to be won by a great korean golfer. sung hee 81 park. >> jimmy: almost. you see how seamlessly he fulfills his duties as president and plugs his golf course at the same time? it's a beautiful thing to watch. it really is. meanwhile, this is what president obama is up to. president obama had jury duty today. for real. he reported for jury duty this morning in chicago. you see he shook hands with some of the people there, he said hello to the other prospective jurors, then was not selected. he was dismissed. of course he was dismissed. in order to serve on a jury you have to be born in the united states, right? [ laughter ] maybe i'm confusing that. anyway.

i hope jared kushner gets a fair trial, i really do. you know, this is something we covered last night. i and many of my counterparts have taken issue with a great many things donald trump has done in his first year as president. it have to be honest, it hasn't all been bad. in fact, yesterday i was looking the white house website. healthcare.gov specifically. and i have to admit the health care plan isn't bad, it's pretty good. last night i encouraged people, even liberals who don't like trump, to think about signing up for trump care, at the very least, take a look at it. i will say some of the people with whom i'm typically at odds on social media actually had some positive things to say. let's go through facebook. this from anastasia. got to respect jimmy for keeping an open mind, goes a lot into healing the divide. thank you, anastasia, same to you. reena, i applaud jimmy for this. thanks, reena, that means a lot. andrea, it's funny how he made fun of the president for ruining health care, but now that he's actually

stupid liberals could have been supportive from the beginning. maybe true, now let's move forward. last night even jimmy kimmel was in support of trump care. yeah, all right. from brock, thank you jimmy for pointing out the good, not just the bad. you're welcome. i got a lot of tweets about this too. this is from lil sloth 19, am i dreaming or is jimmy on trump's side for once? you're not dreaming, i'm a reasonable person. ellen, too bad you're just now finding the content of our president's agenda worthwhile, about time you woke up to smell america again. well. better to smell america late than never, ellen. bozak 78, anything is better than obamacare, which is exploding, some states only have one insurance provider, democrats have created a monopoly. yes, so sign up at healthcare.gov and fight back against these democrats. and finally, trevor, jimmy kimmel has been pretty hard on the gop and trump, but even jimmy would like you to check out the administration's

healthcare.gov website, sign up until december 15th, get covered, #trumpcare. exactly, trevor, you understand perfectly what's going on. if you care about health care, go to donald trump's website healthcare.gov, sign up. according to the "washington post" the first week of trumpcare has been a huge success. a record number of people have signed up, twice as many as obamacare, over 1 million people checked out trumpcare on the first day of enrollment. if that doesn't convince you, pay attention to this special message and share it with your friends, it's important. >> i just found out about trumpcare. >> we just found out about trumpcare. >> i just found out about trumpcare. >> i just found out about trumpcare too. >> my family got coverage we can afford. thanks to trumpcare. >> trumpcare is the market-based insurance program administered by president trump that meets his campaign promise for great, affordable care with no pre-existing conditions or lifetime caps. >> i saved big on trumpcare and so did my employees. >> i never

health care could be. >> no more government health care. you get your insurance from private companies. check it out at healthcare.gov. for plans that could cost as little as $10 a month, or nothing at all. thanks to trumpcare, we're insured. >> i'm insured. >> my whole family's insured. >> sign up for trumpcare now. just go to healthcare.gov. it's easy. >> to find out more about better affordable insurance, go to healthcare.gov. >> thanks, president trump. you made health care great again. >> jimmy: oh, look at that. this health care deal so is good -- [ cheers and applause ] better than advertised. please make sure to help us get the word out. share that video on social media. go to our facebook page. spread it around. together we can make american health care great again, right, guillermo? >> guillermo: right, jimmy! [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: who wants to see a flying lawnmower? [ cheers and applause ] this is a viral video, apparently been around

has millions of views because it's a lawnmower flying. if you haven't seen it before, enjoy. i told you it was a lawnmower. sure enough, it is. now i see something like this and according i have many questions. like, why? and, who? and, what? and it's a mystery. it's a great subject for a song, too. so we teamed up with cma new artist of the year nominee brett young to write lyrics and put them to music. next year's early favorite for cma's song of the year. ♪ ♪ now sit you down and listen cuz i got a tale to spin ♪ ♪ about an unsung hero from the place called booger glen ♪ ♪ his name was gus and every day he'd look up to the sky ♪ ♪ shout "by god before i'm done i'll make this lawnmower fly" ♪ ♪ fly skymower fly

♪ a lone mown bird in the sky ♪ they say i'll probably die before i make that gol darn lawnmower fly ♪ ♪ the villagers they laughed at him and said you must be joking ♪ ♪ a lawnmower is made for grass and not the kind you're smoking ♪ ♪ just trying to hoist it with balloons the darn thing wouldn't rise ♪ ♪ take bottle rockets to the sides it blew up in his eyes ♪ ♪ old gus gave and up grabbed a jug to numb his aching soul ♪ ♪ moonshine dribbled off his chin into the gas hole ♪ ♪ the engine started with a bang grumbled oh so loud ♪ ♪ then that sucker blasted off headed for the clouds ♪ ♪ townsfolk watched that mighty mower soar among the birds ♪ ♪ they stood and

words ♪ ♪ when that mower sharply banked their delight turned to dread ♪ ♪ them spinning blades came flying down and mowed off gunther's head ♪ ♪ fly skymower fly ♪ it's because of the headless guy ♪ ♪ and his dream will never die cuz he's landscaping the pearly gates with his lawnmower in the sky ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: thank you. thanks to brett young and the guy who made the lawnmower fly. we have to take a break. when we come back, a special country music edition of "mean tweets" so stick around! here. i got it from the same place

it's the thing from the link you sent us. ...and the year before... i found the perfect gift for you... ...but it wouldn't ship in time. so i just...texted you a photo. i bought it with one click. i included a gift receipt. it's the thought that counts? don't shop like everybody else. this year shop ebay for brand new, nearly new, and totally you gifts. [ "america" by the 7-seater volkswagen atlas. life's as big as you make it.

for every social occasion. so the the broom said, "sorry i'm late. i over-swept." [ laughter ] yes, even the awkward among us deserve some laughter. and while it's okay to nibble in public, a lady only dines in private. try the name your price tool from progressive. it gives you options based on your budget. uh-oh. discussing finances is a big no-no. what, i'm helping her save money! shh! men are talking. that's it, i'm out. taking the meatballs. ♪ music ♪laying that's it, i'm out. ♪

♪ at ally, we offer a credit card with unlimited cash back. but if that's not enough, we offer a 10% deposit bonus into an ally account. and if that's not enough to help you save, we could help you cut the cord. that's right. cancel it. what about my reality shows? ok, if that's not enough, we'll give you reality. this is too real! maybe a comedy? alright, how about a comedian? arsenio? ain't nothing funny about laundry! we'll do anything, seriously anything, to help your money grow. people just walking in my house... ally. do it right. the volkswagen atlas. with available pedestrian monitoring. life's as big as you make it.

what if there was only one paper? now what if there was only one mattress? one is not a choice. choose your mattress with tulo. everything you want in a bed, in a box. what if there was only one pet? now what if there was only one mattress? one is not a choice. choose your mattress with tulo.

>> jimmy: welcome back to the show. dak shepard, jesse williams, music from luke combs is coming. if you're looking to dress up thanksgiving this year this is something that i think will make a splash. this is not a joke. i repeat, this is not a joke. >> if you're one of those people who can't get enough ranch dressing, you've got to see this. you cansi buy an entire mini keg of ranch. it's an entire year's supply. the company behind it says the keg is lined with a special fda-arofd coating to keep it tasty and fresh. >> jimmy: it took a year but america is great again, it's official. [ cheers and applause ] a mini keg of ranch dressing. it's salad dressing for people who would never, ever eat salad. this is not a product. this is

everyone at hidden valley ranch should be rounded up and locked in prison for producing this. you would be better off bringing a grenade into your home than a keg of ranch dressing. you come home with a keg of ranch, your wife comes home with one too, and you have two kegs? another real product, this is a ranch dressing fountain. another real product. the ranch as you see flows smoothly on the sides. of the fountain. and then directly into your heart. you can also throw a coin into it and wish you were born to a different family. [ laughter ] anyway, finally positive news for chris christie. [ laughter ] [ rim shot ] that was a mean joke, right? that was a mean thing to say. from time to time, as you probably know, we like to shine a light on the not so nice things people post on social media. and we've done it many times. we've done it again tonight. in honor of the cma

i am somewhat, but not overly, proud to present a special country music edition of "mean tweets." [ cheers and applause ] >> the zac brown band is on three radio stations at the same time. as you can imagine, this is the worst day of my life. #hatethem. >> when cassadee pope goes to the bathroom, her name is cassidy poop. >> i want to throw blake shelton off a highway overpass by his legs and watch him get obliterated by peterbilt pulling a big stupid house. >> if you grow a beard like luke combs, don't grow a beard. thank you, man, i really appreciate that. i'll take some vitamins for you. >> randy houser has the sexiest voice but so dang ugly, #bummer. >> [ bleep ] you all. suck my [ bleep ]. >> that guy

>> if we just all concede that trace adkins is a [ bleep ], can we move on? i have. >> i heard his country song and i hate to be dramatic but it's the worst thing that's ever happened to me. the worst? >> sitting here thinking, this song sucks. then i realized it was a dannon shea song and everything made sense. >> would rather live a musicless life than hear jana kramer on the radio. awesome. >> some say i should just ignore what i think sucks, so today i'm ignoring chris young's new album. >> dude from florida georgia line looks like clayton kershaw, if he gave up baseball and started making [ bleep ] music. >> lady antebellum is the musical equivalent of getting kicked in the sac. that can be a good thing. >> just got kicked in the sac with our music. >> chris stapleton proves ugly

>> i kind of feel like jake owen is a douche bag, but i don't know, with a frog emoji and a coffee cup, which i don't even have any idea what has to do with me being a douche bag. >> little big town sounds like they threw cats in a bag and beat them with a tennis racket. >> that is meanness. >> justin moore, get some pants that fit, bro, i can see your balls. [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: tonight on the show music from luke combs. jesse williams from ey's anato anatomy" is here. be right back with dak shepard! >> dicky: portions of "jimmy kimmel live" brought to you by the kmart bluelight special. kmart.com.

♪ can you dance like you should ♪ ♪ make the rules while dancing ♪ ♪ you could dance like you should ♪ ♪ can you dance like you should ♪ ♪ make the rules while dancing ♪ ♪ can you dance like you should ♪ ♪ at 60 million mealsso closto pets in need. that definitely feels good! this holiday season, buy any bag of dog or cat food at petsmart and we'll give a meal to a pet in need. petsmart - for the love of pets. broth, i'm making my stuffing. run, who needs what? tin foil, i'm makin' yams. i'm making my famous cranberry sauce!

get everyday essentials, priced right daily. target run & done.

still get a refreshing any size soft drink

th the days getting shorter and your to-do list getting longer, you'll enjoy this ice-cold deliciousness more than ever. hurry over to mcdonald's. ♪

t...two for five deals all across the board! here it comes... (crowd cheers) a big mac and 10 piece mcnuggets! they got em! get your fan favorites on the mcpick 2 menu. choose any two for just five bucks. they did it! unbelievable! ♪ let me get a mcpick 2 >> jimmy: welcome back to the show. tonight from "grey's anatomy," jesse williams is here. jesse plays dr. jackson avery but he's not a doctor, so if anything weird happens to your body you're on your own tonight. this is his album called "this one's for you." straight from the cmas, luke combs coming to the mercedes-benz outdoor stage.

tomorrow night josh hutcherson will be here, dale earnhardt jr. will join us, and we'll have music from dan auerbach. our first guest tonight is an actor, writer, director, producer -- he invented cotton candy. i think he's done a lot. his new chevrolet-themed holiday movie "el camino christmas" premieres december 8th on netflix. please welcome dax shepard. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> jimmy: you look very handsome. >> thank you. >> jimmy: i will say, it's a good thing i didn't wear a red tie or wed be dressed identically. >> i would love it. you sold the kid short, jesse. >> jimmy: jesse williams. >> he gave me a call and asked to be backstage. >> jimmy: he did? >> i've had a lot of colonoscopies, it was the best i've ever had. [ cheers and applause ]

>> jimmy: have you had one of those? >> weirdly, this is so weird. i've had like five of them. >> jimmy: what? >> because i have an uncle on my mom's side who had some issues. so starting very young my mom's like, you got to do this. oh my gosh, you know about this, we were on our way back from memphis on the airplane, i was eating barbecue and i couldn't eat because was in prep. >> jimmy: oh, right, yeah. >> it was on that time. >> jimmy: yeah. >> i think i'm being light with four or five. it feels like a dozen. >> jimmy: do you space them out or have them all at once? >> i space them out. >> jimmy: okay, okay. >> out of respect for my lovers. [ laughter ] and i think i was getting them every four or five years from 18 up until that time was my last one. i was talking to the proctologist or jesse or whoever does these things. [ laughter ] he said, okay, so i see here you've gotten an inordinate amount of these, do you just like them? and i go, no,

blah, blah, blah, medical condition -- it's not great, guys. he goes, your mom's brother is not familial -- whatever thing i'm supposed to be on high alert for. he goes, you don't need to be getting these. it would need to be your dad's brother. i call my mom, what have you done to me? [ laughter ] i've had like dozens and dozens of these things. you should have done five seconds of research. by the way, this is what it was like growing up before google. you heard something, i heard you're supposed to get those every month! if you have a family member! then there i was. >> jimmy: you can never be too careful. >> yeah, yeah, nothing ever by the way. every time. clean as a whistle in there. nothing wrong. i'm like, oh, dodged another bullet. >> jimmy: i saw that on your wikipedia page. >> avid colonoscopyier. >> jimmy: the

nashville, number to nashville? >> yes, i love nashville, tennessee. >> jimmy: a lot of people are watching from nashville tonight. >> because we're following them. >> jimmy: exactly, yes. >> my wife -- i don't think it's the cmas. the cmts? some country festival, i don't want to start a war, they're all great shows and everyone deserves to be honored, especially us rich people. she hosted three or four years in a row and i've got nothing to do but i'm there for the week. i got obsessed with hot chicken. have you had the hot chicken? >> jimmy: yes, i have. >> across the street from the hotel is hattie b.'s, eating there every day. at a certain point a friend said, if you love this hot chicken, go to the original place that invented it, prince's. have you been to prince's? >> jimmy: i have. >> prince's is in a strip mall. nothing else, everything else is out of business. they're still in business. on the ride there my friend huey said to me, you know, you're not going to be able to get the extra spicy chicken.

and i said why? that's what i'm going for. he said, they don't deserserve white people. [ laughter ] and i said, that can't possibly be true, that's like a hillbilly urban legend. that's not true. so we go in there. as you know, you order from the cook. you step up to the window and they're in there. and i said, hey, i'll get three spicy thighs and i'll have two extra-spicy. and he goes, and i'm not getting my black accent. i'm tempted to. yeah, yeah, yeah. he goes, okay, yeah. >> jimmy: hello! [ cockney accent ] >> four spicy chicken wings! how am i doing? prince's is in england, i should have told you that. he goes, okay, yeah, so five spicy thighs. and i go, no, no. three spicy and two extra-spicy. he goes, i'll get you five spicy. and i go, hold on a second. is it true that you won't sell this to m

and he goes, ha ha! he tells all his buddies, they all start laughing. i realize they don't sell white people this extra-spacey chicken. he goes, okay, okay, two extra-spicy. three spicy. i'm like, all right action here we go. three of the guys brought the tray out to me. they just stood at the end of the table. [ laughter ] huey, like this is delivering on all levels for him, because the staff is going to watch me eat this chicken. and i eat it. and i have an inordinately high tolerance for spicy stuff. i did the hot ones chicken wing thing and i went back for seconds. there's something medically wrong. so i eat that extra spicy. and i'm stone cold steve austin. "good chicken." and they went bananas. [ laughter ] it was like the best thing that ever happened. >> jimmy: wow. [ cheers and applause ] >> it's so hot. you can

right? you could be eating a tire iron. all you're tasting is like napalm. but it's good. >> jimmy: maybe not a bad idea to keep having those colonoscopies, by the way. [ laughter ] dax shepard is here. "elle camino christmas." we'll be right back. this this this this is my body of proof. proof of less joint pain and clearer skin. this is my body of proof that i can take on psoriatic arthritis with humira. humira works by targeting and helping to block a specific source of inflammation that contributes to both joint and skin symptoms. it's proven to help relieve pain, stop further joint damage, and clear skin in many adults. humira is the #1 prescribed biologic for psoriatic arthritis. humira can lower your ability to fight infections, including tuberculosis. serious, sometimes fatal infections and cancers, including lymphoma, have happened; as have blood, liver, and nervous system problems, serious allergic reactions,

ng heart failure. before treatment, get tested for tb. tell your doctor if you've been to areas where certain fungal infections are common, and if you've had tb, hepatitis b, are prone to infections, or have flu-like symptoms or sores. don't start humira if you have an infection. want more proof? ask your rheumatologist about humira. what's your body of proof? i got it from the same place i bought your present from last year... it's the thing from the link you sent us. ...and the year before... i found the perfect gift for you... ...but it wouldn't ship in time. so i just...texted you a photo. i bought it with one click. i included a gift receipt. it's the thought that counts? don't shop like everybody else. this year shop ebay for brand new, nearly new, and totally you gifts. behold the power of energizer® ultimate lithium™. ♪ music

when i was too busy with the kids to get a repair estimate. i just snapped a photo and got an estimate in 24 hours. my insurance company definitely doesn't have that...

liberty stands with you™. liberty mutual insurance. ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ for those who know what they're really building. always unstoppable. so, verizon and google have teamed up on the pixel 2. it's a match made in tech heaven. it's like verizon is the oil and google is the balsamic. no, actually they separate into a suspension. it's more like the google pixel 2 is the unlimited storage. and verizon is the best unlimited plan. what if it's like h2 and o? yeah. that's right. i had a feeling that would score with you guys. good meeting. (avo) when you really, really want the best

the pixel 2 for up to $300 off on google's exclusive wireless partner, verizon. hurry in! get fifty percent off all jeans, sweaters, and outerwear at old navy.

>> jimmy: dax shepard is here. dax has a movie coming out called "el camino christmas" on netflix. is this about the car, the el camino? >> this has nothing to do with the car. it's a fictitious town in texas, a coen-esque kind of christmas story that involves a shoot-out and a liquor store. >> jimmy: i see. >> for the holidays. >> jimmy: a heartwarming family drama. >> yeah, yeah, you get the whole family together. >> jimmy: i see. >> pop this on netflix. >> jimmy: you shot it when? >> i shot it in may, i think. >> jimmy: you shot it in may. >> yeah, yeah. my wife has a competing christmas film. >> jimmy: oh, yeah, your wife is in "bad moms christmas." [ cheers and applause ] >> yeah. so it's not really competing. hers is in theaters. >> jimmy: she has so much going on. the tv show on the air right

commercial. she's saving old people from hurricanes, yeah, she's very active. she does a ton of interviews. you know, eventually just you run out of stuff to talk about, as you're seeing now. [ laughter ] and i was at a restaurant last night. this is the truth, honest truth. and this stranger comes up to me, hey! i just read your kids walked in on you having sex. and i was like, what are you talking about? he goes, yeah, i saw a headline, your wife said your kids walked in on you having sex. i don't even know that she told that story. i don't know what version she told of it. >> jimmy: so it did happen? >> ish, yes. >> jimmy: uh-huh, oh. >> i said to the guy, what was the story? he goes, i just read the headline. and i go, okay. they didn't walk in while i was like pounding mom. [ laughter ] we put on the tv in the living room. we're bad pa

afternoon delight. we were just under the sheets and they walk in. it's more just explaining why we were taking a nap in the afternoon. >> jimmy: it was the pregame portion. >> yes, yes, it wasn't full coitus interruptus. needless to say i couldn't have gotten out of bed at that point. [ laughter ] that would have been a strange nap i would say, yeah, yeah. but this stuff happens all the time. because, again, she talks. >> jimmy: she's on social media. >> social media, that's another thing. the other day -- i don't eat gluten. i of a hearhave arthritis, when, i feel bad. i tweeted, best guten-free pizza, come nose. then a litany of like i recommended buying pizza from isis. dominos, what? why don't you try papa john's, bitch! like what?

then all the rest of the people, oohh, gluten free! so angry that i'm not eaten gluten. so i wrote, hey, heads up, i also don't eat catfish. i hope you're pissed about that. i've never had pickled herring, i'm not going to try it. why is it this one thing has everyone in the red? >> jimmy: i don't know bud i'm mad about it too. >> right, i know. >> jimmy: i'm a little bit mad. >> people think it's taken seeking. >> jimmy: i'll tweet at you later about it. dax shepard. "el camino christmas" on netflix december 8th. be right back with jesse williams. coke zero is now coke zero sugar, with great coke taste. some people were excited to hear the news, some were skeptical. so we're not going to have the star of the show you're watching come out and say "you'll love it!" no special jingle written by this week's hottest pop star no famous internet celebs who happen to be holding the label just so. okay, maybe just one little pour shot.

the only thing that will make you believe coke zero sugar has great coke taste, is trying it yourself. ice cold coke zero sugar. try one today. get ready for the holidays and get kohls cash for you get a dinnerware set and get $10 kohls cash get a cookware set and get $30 kohls cash or a shark vacuum and youll get $80 kohls cash earn kohls cash on everything spend it on anything give joy, get joy at kohls hi. so i just got off the phone with our allstate agent, and i know that we have accident forgiveness. so the incredibly minor accident that i had tonight... four weeks without the car. okay, yep. good night. with accident forgiveness, your rates won't go up just because of an accident. switching to allstate is worth it. your rates won't go up just because of an accident. ♪

grey goose. give the world's best tasting vodka. ♪ i've been watching ...now ba-by.s ♪ stack that beef. lay that swiss! whoa. ♪ wrap it up. oh, a basket instead. ok. the reuben is back for a limited time at subway. so much reuben. broth, i'm making my stuffing. run, who needs what? tin foil, i'm makin' yams. i'm making my famous cranberry sauce! so... a can of cranberry sauce? get everyday essentials, priced right daily. target run & done. ♪ ♪ ♪

the all new 2018 camry. toyota. let's go places. give joy, at kohlsright now with an extra 15% off give joy with a sequined sweater the perfect ankle boots or a cuddl duds throw. and when you give joy, you get joy with kohls cash presents for them, kohls cash for you give joy, get joy at kohls depression is a tangle that can make you sad, feel tired, and have difficulty concentrating. trintellix is a prescription medication for depression. it may help you take a step forward in improving your depression.

if your depression worsens, or you have unusual changes in mood, behavior or thoughts of suicide. antidepressants can increase these in children, teens and young adults. do not take with maois. tell your healthcare professional about your medications, including migraine, psychiatric and depression medications, to avoid a potentially life-threatening condition. increased risk of bleeding or bruising may occur, especially if taken with nsaid pain relievers, aspirin or blood thinners. manic episodes or vision problems may occur in some people. may cause low sodium levels. the most common side effects were nausea, constipation and vomiting. ask your healthcare professional if it's time for a change to trintellix.

>> jimmy: our next guest plays dr. jackson avery on "grey's anatomy" which airs its 300th episode tomorrow night. please welcome jesse williams! [ cheers and applause ] ♪

>> jimmy: jesse, of the 300 -- [ cheers and applause ] >> thank you. >> jimmy: i have to give the audience a moment to get accustomed to your eyes. okay. [ cheers and applause ] there are even staff members snapping and hooting. good to see you, how are you? >> good to see you. >> jimmy: of those 300 episodes how many have you been in? >> i think probably almost exactly 200. >> jimmy: oh, okay. >> i think 194 that have aired and we're on episode 12 or 13 now. >> jimmy: were you shooting today? >> i just came from set, yeah. >> jimmy: will you take a break over the holidays? >> we do get a substantial break around christmas, hanukkah. >> jimmy: do you have plans? do you have a thing for the holidays? >> i'll be working. i'll be working on tech projects and stuff. >> jimmy: what kind of tech projects? >> ebroji, this amazing gif keyboard -- >> jimmy: hold on a second, what? >>

"graphics." >> jimmy: jif? >> i'm not going to get into this with you again. it's this hilarious cultural language extension keyboard that we have that's really fun, ebroji, like emoji but ebroji. >> jimmy: what is that? >> it's a gif. our curated gifs around what's happening now. it's a move example thing. we're probably making several of them right now, right now. >> jimmy: okay. >> i've got that, i've got scali, a mobile app that connects students to scholarships. [ cheers and applause ] over $80 million in scholarships already, scoli. >> jimmy: wow. >> we have a new game coming out called blebrity, this great parlor game. >> jimmy: what? >> like blah celebrity. >> jimmy: you're running a pun factory. >> we're killing it. >> jimmy: do you go to

valley and pitch it? >> i do. i was at apple not long ago. >> jimmy: you pitch to apple directly? >> yeah. that's what happened. >> jimmy: wow. that's a big deal. >> it is, it is. we've got a great relationship up there. the stuff is doing pretty well. >> jimmy: do we go, the guy from grey's anatomy is here pitching us. >> if they know me from that. sometimes they know in from activism, social justice stuff. [ cheers and applause ] it's a whole new world. it's exciting because it's -- i'm just a student, i'm learning as i go. >> jimmy: you can get a scholarship from your own app. >> exactly, exactly. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: cap in to hundreds of millions of dollars. >> i'm telling you. >> jimmy: you go up there, you pitch to who up there? >> well, i did -- i've met with eddie ku and tim cook, big shots over there. >> jimmy: you met with tim cook? >> i did. >> jimmy: oh. did they give you an iphone? >> they gave me ear buds. >> jimmy: ear buds. >> right, right? >> jimmy: no phone? >> only one ear, one in the box. >> jimmy: you went around

>> i look like i'm talking to plies. >> jimmy: when you're not working, not doing your tech stuff, not working on the show what do you do, what is your hopby? do you have one? >> a hobby that i'm trying to get back into since i'm near the ocean on the west coast is sailing. i grew up sailing. >> jimmy: what? >> yeah, i got a big family -- >> jimmy: you know how to do it all yourself? >> i'm a little rusty but i grew up racing and going out, my family, all my uncles are boat builders and sailors and captains. >> jimmy: wow. >> so new england summers, yeah. racing boats, huge trips on schooners and sloops. five, six-day trips. >> jimmy: those long trips. >> yeah, no land in sight. >> jimmy: isn't that dangerous? do you get nervous on a trip like that? >> not if you're prepared as you can be. it's the most humbling experience, you're in the notion, it could swallow you in two seconds and not even notice. it gives you perspective. >> jimmy: then you go call for help and ebrojis would be coming out of your phone -- no problem here. >> yeah, perfect stor

it gets hairy. >> jimmy: does it? >> absolutely terrifying. >> jimmy: what is something scary that's happened to you? >> i've been in a big storms with waves way taller than our boat. here's one. so i was sailing with my best friend at the time, colin, and jonah. this was in college. we went on this six-day trip up basically from like providence to essentially nova scotia. northern maine. five, six days. no land, no stops, no ports. we're watching the sun rise, the sun set. the moon rise, the moonset. a school of 40 dolphins racing with the boat under the moon night, a beautiful night with three gentlemen drinking pabst blue ribbon. [ cheers and applause ] we went through a whale sanctuary. where there was one tour boat out there looking at these whales breach and crash down. and so we're in the 30-foot sloop at the time. about 30 foot long, this whale came and started flirting with our boat. going underneath us. we have

off the back, it's nudging it and toying with it. as i mentioned the beverages that were being imbibed at the time. me and colin had the great idea, why don't we get in the dinky, get a closer look? we pulled in the rubber dinghy and jumped in, jonah purchasinged us out. i was a photographer, taking pictur pictures. we were idiots. 35-millimeter camera taking photographs of this gigantic whale that's almost nudging the dinghy, in two seconds could have flipped us. i was about to touch it, it was right there, about to touch it. i remember saying out loud, sdwroo wh "what kind of whale has a dorsal fin?" those are gills. that's a shark! that's a shark! like right as my hand was going in the water. and it was the most thrilling, terrifying, simultaneous -- i immediately envisioned the newspaper headline, "area idiot decides -- last

get in the dinghy, reaches in and touches the 30-foot whale voluntarily." who chooses to get in a smaller boat? >> jimmy: oh my god. >> but it was also really exciting at the same time. >> jimmy: yeah, of course it's exciting, yeah. but you should never go in the water. >> no. >> jimmy: don't even go swimming, really. >> just stay away from large bodies of water. we had jonah pull us back in, you could hear the empty cans clinking. >> jimmy: did you offer the shark a beer? >> yeah, probably had some of my pee on it. is what it got. >> jimmy: oh my goodness. >> yeah, that was pretty awesome because we survived. >> jimmy: well, sure, yeah, obviously. >> it would have made for a cool article. >> jimmy: we wouldn't know the story otherwise. congratulations on surviving. 197 episodes of "grey's anatomy." thursday nights on abc. be right back with luke combs! >> dicky: the "jimmy kimmel live" concert series is presented by mercedes-benz. the best or nothing.

still get a refreshing any size soft drink for just one dollar at mcdonald's? with the days getting shorter and your to-do list getting longer, you'll enjoy this ice-cold deliciousness more than ever. hurry over to mcdonald's. ♪ well it's a perfect nespresso hold on a second.orge. mmm. ♪ [mel torme sings "comin' home baby"] hey there. want a lift? ♪ where are we going? no don't tell me. let me guess.

have a nice ride. ♪ how far would you go for coffee that's a cup above? i brought you nespresso. nespresso. what else? t...two for five deals all across the board! here it comes... (crowd cheers) a big mac and 10 piece mcnuggets! they got em! get your fan favorites on the mcpick 2 menu. choose any two for just five bucks. they did it! unbelievable! ♪ let me get a mcpick 2 >> dicky: the "jimmy kimmel live" concert series is presented by mercedes-benz. the best or nothing. >> jimmy: i want to thank dax shepard, jesse williams and apologize toat

"nightline" is next, but first his album is called "this one's for you" here with the song "when it rains it pours" luke combs! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ ♪ sunday morning man she woke up fighting mad bitching and moaning ♪ ♪ on and on 'bout the time i had and by tuesday you could say that girl ♪ ♪ was good as gone and then when thursday came around ♪ ♪ i was all alone so i went for a drive to clear my mind ended up at a shell ♪ ♪ on i-65 then i won a hundred bucks on a scratch off ticket bought two twelve packs ♪ ♪ and a tank of gas with it she swore they were a waste of time oh but she was wrong

i was caller number 5 ♪ ♪ on the radio station won a 4-day 3-night beach vacation deep sea senorita ♪ ♪ fishing down in panama and i ain't gotta see my ex future mother-in-law anymore ♪ ♪ oh lord when it rains it pours when it rains it pours ♪ ♪ now she was sure real quick to up and apologize when she heard ♪ ♪ about my newfound luck on that item dial ♪ and it's crazy how lately now ♪ ♪ it just seems to come in waves what i thought was gonna be the death of me ♪ ♪ was my saving grace

it's got me thinking that her leaving is the only logical reason ♪ ♪ that i got the last spot in the hooter's parking lot and the waitress left her number ♪ ♪ on my check with a heart she picked up on the first ring when i gave her a call ♪ ♪ i only spent five bucks at the moose club raffle won a used four-wheeler and three free passes ♪ ♪ for me and two of my buddies to play a round of golf and i ain't gotta see ♪ ♪ my ex future mother-in-law anymore oh lord when it rains it pours ♪ ♪ when it rains it pours i've been on one hell of a redneck roll for three weeks now ♪

♪ and it all started on the day that she walked out then i won ♪ ♪ a hundred bucks on a scratch off ticket bought two twelve packs and a tank of gas with it ♪ ♪ she swore they were a waste of time oh but she was wrong and i was caller number 5 ♪ ♪ on the radio station won a 4-day 3-night beach vacation deep sea senorita ♪ ♪ fishing down in panama and i ain't gotta see my ex future mother-in-law anymore ♪ ♪ oh lord when it rains it pours when it rains it pours ♪

this is "nightline." >> tonight, the long road home. on the set of a new miniseries. >> rolling! >> iraq war veterans reliving the ferocious firefight that changed their lives. >> fire came from the right-hand side of the street and the left and the front and the rear. >> opening up about the war within themselves. >> the guilt is that i didn't get shot and he did. >> and the emotional battles they say they finally won. >> a year ago i was impatienpat for depression, suicide. a year later, everything's different ♪ i was