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tv   Jimmy Kimmel Live  ABC  December 12, 2017 11:35pm-12:37am EST

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from hollywood, dwayne johnson, guillermo del toro, music from g-eazy. here's jimmy kimmel! [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: hi, everyone. thank you for watching. thanks for joining us on yet another
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states. the state of alabama had a special election to decide whether or not an alleged sexual predator of young girls would be their senator. remember when we used to find out senators were dirt bags after we elected them? i don't know the results yet. the polls just closed. i do know that roy moore, he shouldn't even be in -- i'm not talking about the senate race. i mean the human race. today he rode a horse named sassy to his polling place. young girls love ponies, i guess. there's been plenty of opposition to roy moore even within his own party. the other republican senator from alabama spoke out against him and said he did not vote for him. president trump's daughter e-ivankaa spoke out against him. she said there's a special place in hell for people who prey on children.
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before that, there's a special place for him in the senate. by me. so there are rumblings, if he wins, republican leaders might not even put roy moore on any committees. which would be -- roy moore could become the first person to be banned from the senate budget committee and the mall. both of those things. they held a rally last night -- [ applause ] the moore campaign had a rally. his wife kayla moore, who we've not seen much of, made it clear that contrary to what you see on the fake news, she and her husband are not bigots. in fact quite the contrary. >> fake news would tell that you we don't care for jews. i tell you all this because i've seen it all so i want to set the record straight while they're here. [ cheers and applause ] one of our attorneys is a jew.
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>> jimmy: well, i know i have to keep saying this but those aren't actors. this really happened. those are people. one of their attorneys is a jew. it's like usually when she says that word, she whispers it. now she has a mike in her hand and it comes blasting out. theon time you should be hitting the word jew that hard is when it is followed by manji. right? and take a look at this. [ cheers and applause ] maybe the most remarkable part of this very remarkable speech is that she has notes. she's got, that jew line is something she wrote down. can you imagine what she might have said if she were winging it? i'm going to take the word dirt why you out before jew. i think that would go down a little bit smoother. and by the way -- she didn't stop there. now that she had the jews in her pocket, mrs. moore took time
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highlight her husband's support of the african-american community. >> when he first took office as chief justice many years ago, he brought with him three people, two were black. and one of them is here tonight. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: that clock is about to get set way back. then roy himself got up there to say a few words about his wife and somehow managed to make the night even more awkward. >> i appreciate her so much. she's been a good mother. she has closer contact with the kids than i do. >> jimmy: well, i don't know. according to the security guards at the mall, you and the kids were pretty close. then, and i know it is almost impossible to believe there's more but there is. then one of roy's old buddies who served with him in vietnam told the story about a night one of their fellow soldiers took them to a brothel. i'm
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run this anecdote by anyone before sharing it. >> he took us to this place which turned out to be a brothel. we walked inside. i can tell you what i saw but i don't want to. it was clear to us what kind of place it was. and roy turned to me, in less time than it took for someone to come up to us. and there were certainly pretty girls, and they were girls. they were young. some were probably very young. i don't know. i don't remember. i wasn't there long enough. roy said to me, we shouldn't be here. i'm leaving. or words to that effect. in fact, i think those were his exact words. >> so he is a hero, it turns out. [ applause ] hey, bill, gotfully good stories about roy you can share? got one about some child prostitutes he didn't have sex with. that's
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that's like defending o.j. by saying i was in a room with him once and he didn't kill anyone what a group this is. and there is the capper. a spokesman for the roy campaign was on cnn with jake tapper. you know when they call someone a mouth breather? this man has not made use of his nostrils since probably 1984. >> judge moore has also said that he doesn't think a muslim member of congress should be allowed to be in congress. why? under what -- >> because you have to swear on the bible. when you are before -- i had to do it. i'm an elected official. three terms. i had to swear on a bible. you have to swear on a bible to be an elected official in the united states of america. he alleges that a muslim cannot do that ethically, swearing on the bible. >> you don't have to actually swear on a christian bible. you can swear on anything really. i don't know if you knew. that you can swear on a jewish bible. >> oh, no,
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i've double it three times. >> i'm sure you have. but the law is not that you have to swear on a christian bible. that's not the law. you don't know that? all right. >> i don't know -- i know that donald trump did it when we made him president. >> because he's christian and he picked it. with the moore campaign. thank you so much for being here. thank you. >> jimmy: very impressive. merry christmas. by the way, jake tapper happens to be jewish. so that's the spokesman for the moore campaign. they called themselves morons. did you know that? we have a great show for you tonight. we have music from g-eazy and halsey are here with us tonight. a director of a really great new movie called the shape of water, guillermo del toro is here tonight. [ cheers and applause ] and dwayne johnson is
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and i'll tell you something. i'm glad -- [ cheers and applause ] in times like these, sometimes you just want someone to hold you in your arms and sing the moana soundtrack. they did a study at cambridge university that said sheep are smart enough to recognize celebrity faces. so they show a sheep a picture of a fails person, that's president obama. and then at the sheep eight out of times will go to the celebrity. so tonight we'll find out if it will work with a real celebrity riflt dwayne johnson has agreed to take part and so has the sheep. christmas is less than two weeks away. tonight is the first night of hannukkah. for those who don't know, the story is judah macabee's cell phone only had enough charge for one night but it sta
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eight nights and hannukkah was born. sorry about that. i don't have a jew lawyer to teach me this stuff. do you know about the elf on the shelf? oval a shelf is tearing our family apart. we forget to move it almost every night. we have to sneak in in the morning and try -- we convinced our daughter that the elf is spying on her, reporting back to santa. so she has this little rat staring at her all night. it is a destructive force in the home. but fortunately there is a new little sentry for all religions. >> this holiday season, say goodbye to elf on a shelf. start an exciting new christmas tradition with lanister on the banister. he will see to it that your children behave. >> winter is coming. >> no one can escape the king
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chop your hand off. like this! >> forget milk and cookies. that's not the lanister way. >> oh! mutton! >> jamie will teach your kids so many valuable lessons. i soon knew a man who broke a promise. soon after they were invited to a wedding. and all the doors were locked so no one could escape. then they were all slaughtered. their bodies scored by arrows, sliced open by daggers, throats slit. that great hall became an ocean of blood. now give your sister back her toy. >> you'll notice the difference almost immediately. >> thanks, lanister on the banister. >> well, hello! now, you remind me of my sister. >> your complete satisfaction is guaranteed. call today to order
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a banister. four easy payments of $19.99. if you order now, get targaryen in the aquarium. >> available at walgreens! >> jimmy: thank you for that. we'll take a break. when we come back from the break, we've gone through many of them and we'll sing a loud the best clip, the 2017 clip of the year. it will be awarded when we come back so stick around. the ford year-end sales event is in full swing. ( ♪ ) you are going to be a big surprise. (whining) aww, i see a big puppy. i see a b-i-i-g pu-u-ppy. hey greg! that's ford, america's best-selling brand. now get exclusive holiday offers, with 0% financing for 72 months
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>> jimmy: welcome back
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g-eazy and halsey are here. the great director guillermo del toro is with us. we look back fondly on the greatest clips. clips checked by four selfless tv watchers. they sacrifice everything. their time, their personal hygiene, any hope of a meaningful relationship is gone because they watch television 12 hours a day, seven days a week. thanks to these filthy individuals, we'll name one of the diamonds they uncovered. clip of the year, 2017. that's right. and the nominees are -- not so smart device. >> play ticker ticker. >> can you -- >> do you want to hear a station -- hot chick -- >> no, no
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>> alexis stop! >> mastergator. [ speaking spanish ] >> jimmy: team playa! >> i always wish to be in one of this, and i got it. so thank you very much for this. for giving me this. and i appreciate my fans, also. my wife and my girlfriend. i mean my wife. sorry to say. i'm so sorry. my wife. i love you so much. >> jimmy: all right. hurricane donald.
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>> puerto rico. we love puerto rico. >> jimmy: on the nose! and this just in. >> i would argue this is a democracy. scandals happen all the time. the question is how do we respond to those scandals. >> and what will it mean for the wider region? i think one of your children has just brought in -- shifting sands in the region? do you think the relations in the north may change? >> i would be surprised if they do. pardon me. my apologies.
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my apologies. sorry. south korea's policies toward the north -- >> jimmy: wow! so many wonderful clips. it's so hard to make a decision like this. but ladies and gentlemen, the clip of the year for 2017 is -- can i get he a drum roll, please? oh, my goodness. on the nose! wow! and here to accept the award for clip of the year, all the way from grand rapids, michigan, mary crenwinkle, everyone! [ cheers and applause ] ♪
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>> jimmy: i guess we'll just mail this to her home. congratulations to mary and all of our finest. tonight on the show, g-eazy we halsey is here, guillermo del toro and we'll be back with dwayne johnson! dicky: portions of "jimmy kimmel live" are brought to you by the new twenty-eighteen nissan rogue, innovation that excites.
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>> jimmy: hello there. welcome back to the show. tonight on the show, one of my top two favorite guillermos. he is director and writer of a terrific new movie called "the shape of water." guillermo del toro is here. then, this album is called "the beautiful and damned." g-eazy with halsey from the mercedes-benz outdoor stage. tomorrow night, terry bradshaw will join us. yvette nicole brown will be here. we'll have music from john legend. sheila e. will be sitting in with the cletones. and on thursday, will smith, pharrell williams, and music from n.e.r.d. so please join us. our first guest could beat up every member of the screen actors guild and their agents too. he is an internationally beloved superstar with a new m
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jungle." it opens in theaters a week from tomorrow. please welcome dwayne johnson. [ cheers and applause ] >> thank you, thank you. thank you. >> jimmy: i have to say when i see you walk out here, i think why don't we work out together? why don't we get in the gym -- >> you never return my texts. i'm always saying why don't we work out. >> jimmy: i can learn some things from you and you can learn some things from me. >> we can make it work. >> jimmy: what times do you work out? >> generally around 5:00 a.m.
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forget it. is there a cot in the gym? i could take a little nap while you're working out. >> a little tanning booth in there. you can tan. >> jimmy: congratulations, by the way. you mentioned on social media that you and your girlfriend are expecting a second daughter. >> we are, thank you, my friend. >> jimmy: congratulations. >> thank you. very excited. very excited. i've got some strong swimmers, jimmy. >> jimmy: i would expect nothing less. >> that's right. >> jimmy: i wouldn't even get in a pool with you for fear. the first pregnant man. yes. on jimmy kimmel. but do you, before you announce something on social media, something personal like this, do you contact every member of your family to make sure they know from you before they know from everyone else? >> well, family is so important to me. so naturally, i contact no one.
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maybe five people knew. that was it. it was tightly locked down. >> jimmy: wow! >> and we sent out the post announcing the pregnancy, and it was actually, it was the day of the premier. the "jumanji" premier. and the phone was blowing up. you get a mix of, congratulations, we're so excited for you and the other 50% is why didn't i know? why didn't i -- >> jimmy: who was most upset in your family? >> my mom. i'mon kidding. i'm only kidding! it was everyone but -- >> jimmy: that's very exciting. >> we're very, very excited. >> jimmy: are you ready for this? do you feel prepared? >> i feel good. i was raised by women all my life basically. and this is my
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>> jimmy: and now you're raising more women. >> surrounded by the estrogen. >> jimmy: you're also, another major life event. you're getting a star in the hollywood walk of fame. that's a big deal, right? >> it's a huge deal. so this is a good week and i'm really, really grateful this week. with the walk of fame, i got into this business 17 years ago. this will be my 18th year coming up in 2018. the only thing i knew was what i was willing to do, put in my work with my own two hands. so i feel like this ceremony is a full circle thing. i can't wait to do and it i think it is right out here. >> jimmy: do you know what stars your star is near? >> do i. so the committee was excited to tell me on one side is vince mcmahon -- >> really. >> who is my mentor and a father figure to me for many, many years. and on the other
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mars. >> jimmy: who is also a father figure. >> who is also like my son. so it worked out to be a family affair. >> jimmy: if you don't like where your thing is, you could probably just reach in and rip it out and put it over mine. >> oh, you have one. i didn't know! that's great. >> jimmy: let's ask that question again in a less insulting way. >> got it. hey. you have one too. oh, dude, great! that's right, i guess. i walk by it all the time. >> jimmy: i don't want to start trouble with you but we did have a little bit of a beef, as they call it. >> that's what we call it in the streets, yes. >> jimmy: i saw an article in the news that said, fannie pack sales had spiked.
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it became a new accessory. the most popular accessory for 2017 and they attributed this spike to this photograph of you from -- [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: the old days. you said vince mcmahon was like a father figure to you. when you came out dressed like that, vince didn't say go back in your room and change? >> no! that's a good look. >> jimmy: i happened to in september wear a fannie pack to the emmys and i felt i was responsible for this spike in fannie packiness. >> there in lies the issue that we have, right? >> jimmy: right. and then you posted this which got me a little nervous. it looks like when i come to your share next month, we'll have ourselves an old-fashioned fanny packer contest. that sounds wrong. bring it. so
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where's yours! [ cheers and applause ] can. >> you know what? i now humbly give the crown to you. >> jimmy: thank you very much. and i will store that crown in my fannie pack. we'll be right back! it isn't always easy to know where you stand financially. multiple accounts, investments, insurance- it can leave you wondering how it all fits together. at northwestern mutual, we help you see your whole picture, find out what you truly want, and then together we design a plan to go get it. there's a confidence that comes in knowing what financial security is and doing what it takes to achieve it. take the first step. connect with an advisor at northwesternmutual.com.
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>> no way that's good news. >> rhinos! >> they're huge, white and scary. "jumanji: welcome to the jungl"" opens in theaters a week from tomorrow. those are cgi
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>> they are. >> jimmy: were there a few real animals? >> there were. i think we had a real snake -- i have real animal magnetism as it is. so they were attracting all kinds of animals. >> so you're saying like doctor doolittle type. they would come out to meet you in the jungle. >> i have the magnetic, how do we say in it france? that doesn't make sense. basically, yes, that i have thing. animals are attracted to me. >> jimmy: and we're going to test that. i don't know if you saw it earlier, there was a study at the university. they brought these sheep out and they showed them a picture of a famous person and not a not famous person. 80% of the time the sheep would go to the famous person. which is very interesting. >> and i'm well aware of the study. >> jimmy: so now we would like to try it
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you are a famous person. >> yes. >> jimmy: we got a sheep. the sheep is backstage and we're going to test it. first we need a control subject. if you want to pick someone from our studio audience -- let's pick someone from the audience. >> i select the lovely lady in pink. >> jimmy: all right. yes. come on up. >> so you will go right over here. and lady in pink, what is your name, lady in pink? >> jane. >> jimmy: jane? oh, my daughter's name is jane. this is jane. dwayne. jane. dwayne. >> hi, jane. >> jimmy: i'm right over here. jane? are you ready for this study? you consent to be a part of this study? >> yes. >> jimmy: so speak right into this microphone.
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and dwayne, you're inside the box. are you going to be insulted if the sheep doesn't recognize you? if the sheep picks jane instead of you? will this be a blow to your ego? >> yes. but i have all the confidence. i do have a question though. is there a -- is the sheep color blind at all? i want to make sure the sheep is not influenced. >> jimmy: oh, let's ask our scientist. here comes guillermo with the sheep. guillermo, dwayne had a question for you. >> my question is, is the sheep color blind at all? will the sheep be influenced by the pink shirt? >> she's not blind and the color doesn't matter. the color doesn't matter. >> jimmy: the color doesn't matter and she's not blind. may i ask, are you wearing a stethoscope? will you be doing a physical on the sheep? >> i want to check if she's
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>> jimmy: all right. what is the sheep's name? >> daisy. >> jimmy: guillermo, you didn't tip the sheep off and tell her what's going on. >> no, nothing. >> jimmy: so here we go. daisy the sheep is about to be released. and where should i go? should i move? i don't want to affect the sheep. i'm screwing the experiment up. now it's not scientific. i'm going to go home. dwayne, finish the show -- no. i'll go stand over here. daisy, don't look at me. look over at them. >> ready? all right, go, daisy. >> jimmy: let the science begin. unbelievable! wow! well, congratulations. and the part i didn't mention is, since you are the winner, you get to keep the sheep. >> hey! >> j
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thank you very much, jane. jane, you have no idea what the hell is going on, do you? thanks. dwayne johnson, everybody! "jumanji: welcome to the jungl"" opens in theaters a week from tomorrow. we'll be right back with guillermo del toro. i'll tell the world, i'll sing a song it's a better place since you came along since you came along your touch is sunlight through the trees your kisses are the ocean breeze everything's alright when you're with me and i hold my favorite thing i hold the love that you bring
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and the colors are golden and bright again there's a song in my heart, i feel like i belong it's a better place since you came along
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>> jimmy: welcome back to the show. still to come, g-eazy with halsey. our next guest is an exceptionally imaginative maker of movies and monsters with a great new one called "the shape of water," which was just obes, including best picture, best director, please welcome guillermo del toro! >> how are you? >> jimmy: hey, congratulations, first of all, on all the nominations. you got more nominations than any movie. that's exciting. these nol nations came out ye
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did you wake up early to see what would happen? wrurd for it? >> i said to my manager, you call me when everything happens and we'll see. it is not really glamorous. i swleep a cpap machine. >> jimmy: very sexy. i take off my glasses to increase the effect. i'm sleeping. i can't find my glasses. i have the machine like darth vader. hey! he calls again. i'm looking and i grab the cell phone and i put it right next to my eye. nominated for this. that's great. it took four nominations for me to find the glasses. so it's good that it was seven. >> jimmy: when you get nominated for all the golden globes, in mexico, your homeland, is there a celebration? is it big news there? >> it is. i'm hoping i get to be a
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>> jimmy: is that an honor? because they're making a lot of pinatas of donald trump. it doesn't seal like they're honoring him. >> it depends what they're full of. >> jimmy: i was watching, i saw the movie last night. after watching it, i thought this is not just a good movie. it is a classic. and i know the audience hasn't seen a movie before. but explain what the plot is. the plot on paper sounds ridiculous. >> it is. insanely simple and insane. it's for troubling times. an adult fairytale. there is a night shift in a government facility. this mute lady discovers there's a creature they keep there. every night she has a little lunch next to the creature and they form a
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and it is a beautiful moving love story. >> jimmy: and it is, your two main characters don't speak which is a big challenge. >> it is. >> jimmy: the creature itself is kind of grotesque but also, there is a beauty to it. did you create the creature? >> it took three years. we knew we were creating an elemental river god so it needed to be beautiful. it took two years to design, one year to execute. and i will say it is perhaps one of the most beautiful creatures i ever committed to film. >> jimmy: i agree with you. when did you think of this idea for this movie? was it a recent thing? >> no. it started when i was 6. every sunday we would go to church and then watch movies. at 6, i have watching creature from the black lagoon on tv. >> jimmy: there is a similarity. >> yes. it swims underneath. another great story. i was 6. i thought, i'll sure it will end
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the creature will come out well. this is a home invasion movie. they kill the creature at the end of the movie. >> jimmy: yeah, right. it's a creature. >> i said i'm going to correct it. it took 46 years. >> jimmy: i would sewell you're happy with the way it came out. how do you compare it? >> it's a movie that i like the most, that i've ever made. i think it is the best movie. it was a movie that was really difficult to make and we opened in the festival, first time they showed it. we won the golden lion. i genuinely cried like miss universe. except different measurements. >> jimmy: 80 -- is there a better feeling professionally than making a movie and showing to it a group of feeling and then seeing that they enjoy it? >> yes. it's completely -- you start feeling from minute one. the movie starts and
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the audience is with it or without. rarely does it change. >> jimmy: they're either with you or not. >> and you know it the first shot. you basically know the entire life of the movie. the first time you show it. >> jimmy: and you really can't get that sense from testing it. >> you can but a test audience is not in any context. they didn't see a poster. they don't know what it is about. so it can be weird. the first time you really know is with an audience. >> jimmy: michael shannon is the bad guy in the movie and he is fantastic. all the actors. i don't want to single him out. sally hawkins is wonderful. i don't think i'm ruining this. i think this is out there. you have a love scene between a human woman and a -- were you worried when you shot that that it would be completely ridiculous? because -- >> always. every
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but you know, failure and success live next door to each other and they have no numbers at the door. you just knock. the thing that is the most sublime is the thing that can be the most ridiculous. always. so you risk it. >> so you had no idea whether it was work or not? >> i've been doing this for 25 years. it is a little like when humor. the joke or the tragedy exists side to side. and you bring your craft and your experience and you think, what i am a going to do to ensure that it is gorgeous, beautiful, poetic, magical, and then sometimes you're right, sometimes you're not. >> jimmy: the crew, were they on board with it? or were they looking at it as a sea monster and a river monster? >> no. we spent more time shoot go three shots of that and we shot it -- there's no water in those scenes. it is a technique called dry for wet. you if i will the stage with
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smoke and you use fans and you shoot in slow motion so it looks like they're under water. >> jimmy: it did look like it. >> but i tell you, if you think this is weird. let me describe it. there is a musical number. there is a musical number and that was weird. we have an orchestra, 50 musicians with instruments in the tuxedos. and in comes an amphibian man and a woman in a glowing dress. i said, i bet this is the weirdest -- >> jimmy: the band was like, when did we get high? well, it is a beautiful movie. and i encourage everyone to go see it. it is called the shape of water. it is in theaters. guillermo del toro, everybody! and we shall return with music from g-eazy and halsey. >> the
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be certain series presented by mercedes-benz.
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>> jimmy: thats to dwayne johnson, guillermo del toro, and we apologize to matt damon. we ran out of time for him. nightline is next, but first, his album is called "the beautiful and damned" here with the song "him and i" with help from halsey and g-eazy. ♪ cross my heart hope to die to my lover i'd never lie he said be true i swear i'll try in the end it's him and i ♪ ♪ he's out his head i'm out my mind we got that love the crazy kind i am his and he is mine in the end it's him and i him and i ♪ ♪ my '65 speeding up the pcha hell of a ride they don't wanna see us make it they just wanna divide 2017 bonnie and clyde wouldn't see the point of living on if one of us died yeah ♪ ♪ got that kind of style everybody try to rip off ysl dress under when she takes the mink off
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and watch it slip off ever catch me cheating she would try to cut my ha-ha-ha ♪ ♪ crazy but i love her i could never run from her hit it no rubber never would let no one touch her swear we drive each other mad she be so stubborn but what the is love with no pain no suffer ♪ ♪ intense this it gets dense she knows when i'm out of it like she could just sense if i had a million dollars or was down to ten cents she'd be down for whatever never gotta convince you know ♪ ♪ cross my heart hope to die to my lover i'd never lie he said be true i swear i'll try in the end it's him and i ♪ ♪ he's out his head i'm out my mind we got that love the crazy kind i am his and he is mine in the end it's him and i him and i ♪ ♪ him and i woah-oh-oh-oh-oh woah-oh-oh-oh-oh
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in the end it's him and i ♪ ♪ him and i woah-oh-oh-oh-oh woah-oh-oh-oh-oh in the end it's him and i ♪ ♪ we turn up mobbin' til the end of time only one who gets me i'm a crazy gemini remember this for when i die everybody dressed in all black suits and a tie my funeral will be lit if i ♪ ♪ ever go down or get caught or they identify my was the most solid nothing to solidify she would never cheat you'd never see her with a different guy ever tell you different then it's a lie ♪ ♪ see that's my down see that's my soldier she keeps that thang thang if anyone goes there calm and collected she keeps her composure and she gon ride for me until this thing over ♪ ♪ we do drugs together together up clubs together together and we'd both go crazy crazy if we was to sever you know we keep mobbin it's just me and my the world we just gon keep getting rich you know ♪ ♪ cross my heart hope to die to you i've never lied for you i'd take a life it's him and i and i swear ayy
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til the end i'ma ride wit you mob and get money get high wit you yeah ♪ ♪ cross my heart hope to die this is our ride or die you can confide in me there is no hiding i swear stay solid never lie to you swear most likely i'ma die wit you yeah ♪ ♪ cross my heart hope to die to my lover i'd never lie he said be true i swear i'll try in the end it's him and i ♪ ♪ he's out his head i'm out my mind we got that love the crazy kind am his and he is mine in the end it's him and i him and i ♪ ♪ him and i woah-oh-oh-oh-oh woah-oh-oh-oh-oh in the end it's him and i ♪ ♪ him and i woah-oh-oh-oh-oh woah-oh-oh-oh-oh in the end it's him and i ♪
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this is "nightline." >> tonight, breaking news. abc news projects doug jones will win the heated alabama senate race. the first democrat elected to the u.s. senate in alabama in over 25 years. claiming victory. >> we have shown the country the way that we can be unified. but roy moore is not ready to concede. >> when the voice is this close, it's not over. >> the latest on the drama in alabama. plus, is your living space overstuffed with stuff? meet the former cpo

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