ask me about politics. >> three times. your math is terrible. the vets, he says he will keep playing with them as long as he can swing. >> thank you for watching abc news. have a great evening. tonight on an all new kimmy kim l live. >> no course of the 1600 shows, i talked to i guess around 4,000 guests and only oneky remember is sofia. >> paula abzul. >> you haven't said anything weird at all. and i'm disappointed. and music from the i'm a curious seeker. i am a chemistry aficionado.f. diphenhydramine. magnesium hydroxide. atheletes foot.etes . yes. i'm a people pleaser. plea. if elected, i promise flu shots for all.for all. i am a walking medical dictionary.ionary.

congratulations virginia.virgin. inflamed uvula.ed . i'm virginia.virginia. i'm a target pharmacist and i'm here to answer your questions..

>> jimmy: i'm jimmy kimmel with a message from craftsman, the sponsor of "screwed" which challenges to you give unhandyman allen tips. we talked to him after he was blindfolded and dropped him in the december art with nothing but craftsman tools. this is what he went through. the good news, he is still alive. the bad news, he is not done yet. he is in an undisclosed location awaiting for his pickup and

final drop. allen, you don't know where they are taking you. you are in a hotel room now? >> yep. >> jimmy: are there women with you? >> no. >> jimmy: would you like to take this opportunity to say good-bye to anyone? >> my family i guess. why would i say good-bye? >> jimmy: you never know. which is worse. the desert or the bayou? >> the bayou. the insects and the alligators. >> jimmy: you are having fun. >> yeah. >> jimmy: we have a present for you. it's a clue about where you are going. there is the present. open that up. disregard the paper. that has nothing to do with it. okay. now the clue is you will not need either one of these things where you are going. all right?

>> so nowhere fun? >> jimmy: that is correct. thank you, alan. >> tune in live tomorrow and wednesday to help save alan. >> jimmy: back in two minutes with kenny wor and paula abdul. [ female announcer ] the best kind of pantiliner is the kind you can forget about completely. presenting the acti-fresh™ liner from carefree®. so thin, so absorbent, so comfortable you'll forget you're wearing a liner. acti-fresh™ from carefree®. wonderfully forgettable™.

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♪ untamed fruit flavor. jolly rancher. from hollywood, it's "jimmy kimmel live." tonight, paula abdul. from "footloose," kenny wormald. and music from two door cinema club. with cleto and the cletones. and now, first things first, here's jimmy kimmel! [ applause ] >> jimmy: wow.

hi, everyone. thanks. i'm jimmy. i'm the host of the show. thank you for watching. thanks for coming. happy canadian thanksgiving to those of you eating in canada. are you canadian? >> my sister is. >> jimmy: pass along my best. today is a milestone for us. it's our 1600th show. [ applause ] we celebrated today by not realizing it's our 1600th show. that's a lot of shows. i think 30 more to go. in the course of the 1600 shows, i talked to i guess 1400 on guests. and the only one i can remember is sofia vergara. a bunch of people asked how we got this far. and they say success is 10%

perspiration and 10% inspiration? to me, it's 100% perspiration. when the abc execs would come to cancel me, i started sweating. are you -- take it easy, fella. today is columbus day. christopher columbus infected us with smallpox. and years later, we send snooki and deana to italy to infect them. i remember a lot about christopher columbus from elementary school. do you remember the three ships? nina, pinta and santa maria.

and we conducted questions outside and see how they did with columbus' three ships. >> christopher columbus's ships, the queen mary. >> um -- just thinking. i'm going to have to say, it was it would have to be spanish names. probably elizabeth would be one. >> the discovery ship. >> the ships? it was -- the may flower. >> columbus. something from amazon. from jungle. >> 1492, columbus showed the ocean blue in the nina, the

pinta and the santa maria. >> elmo is smart. that is why he is on pbs. we had a new episode of "dancing with the stars" tonight. and things are really starting to not heat up. ricky lake, got 29 out of 30. carson kressley, had 20. chaz bono, had 21. i warned chaz, "dancing with the penises" is tougher than you think. it's movie theme week on the show. [ applause ] don't, it's unseemly on thanksgiving. that means all the dancers tonight were inspired by famous films. you haven't seen "no country for old men" until you have seen it cha-chaed by rob kardashian.

i thought that was the best. a touching tribute to a classic. >> david arquette and kym johnson. ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: you understand? it was "weekend at bernies," the movie. and hence there is where the comedy lies. today marked the return of television to oprah winfrey and rosie o'donnell, as it was foreseen in the scriptures. the rowcy show, it was men dancing everywhere.

it was like judge bruin know eating mexican food. it's on own, tlc, on the lonely old lady in an apartment full of cats channel. and a couple more i can't remember. oprah's show is called "oprah's life class," and teaching show and she teaches how much better she is than we. and spoiler alert, she is alet better. she got very philosophical and i tried to follow along. see what you come back with. >> try this from home or whenever you are now. close your eyes and notice what you are thinking. notice your thoughts. now who is thinking those thoughts? can you notice there is a space where you are observing the thoughts and where you are aware

of the thoughts that you are observing. eckert says you are aware of that awareness. and when i got that, i understood the difference between my true self and my ego self. >> i think oprah just broke through the matrix. i don't understand another of that. is it possible oprah is smoking pot since she left? we could have stolen oprah's credit card. notice that in the warner, amateur porn in the corner.

what was eckert say about that? she does so much good. tiger woods was in on open yesterday. and a man described as a fan started yelling. and then -- >> tiger! >> and threw a hot dog at him. i'm not sure you can still be called a fan when you throw meat at him on a golf course. they tackled the guy. that's the hot dog. at least i hope it's the hot dog. maybe elin is angrier than we thought. imagine her turning on the tv and seeing that take place? tiger finished in a tie for 30th place, not very good. but to be fair, the holes were really fair away from where he was teeing off. hundreds of yards. today was day 24 of the occupy

wall street days in new york. the largest homeless slumber party in the world. the protesters are trying to figure out why they are out there and what they want. and so was wcbs reporter lou young. >> reporter: focus is harder to find. everyone seems to agree, it is catching on but nobody know what is it is. >> jimmy: and we're back. they should start brings curtaining out there to have something to close. because a lot of kids had the day off for columbus day today, the organizers encouraged the protesters to bring their children to the demonstration. it's like bring your children to work day for people who don't have jobs. they say the authorities are 10% less likely to tear gas kids. that's a fact.

it's not joke. some of the kids got bored and decided to occupy sesame street midway through the day. that was a joke. watching the coverage of the protests gave me a fun idea for a game. i'm going to show you a picture of someone. you tell me if it's an occupy wall street picture, at the coachella festival or waiting in line at the apple store. all right this guy? >> coachella. >> jimmy: let's have a look. wall street. next up -- she is not holding an apple phone. that makes me think -- let's have a look. wall street! you're not good at this. next one. >> wall street. >> jimmy: he is not holding on

iphone. all right. he is -- at the apple store. all right. all right. >> coachella. >> jimmy: let's see. is it coachella? that is right. you don't win anything. don't get too excited. he looks like me might be in hawaii. the let's have a look. wall street. okay. and wait a minute. what about this guy? he looks familiar. he was at coachella i think. he is -- where is kanye west? he is on wall street. he is very angry because -- wait, he is a billionaire. he is pretending to be angry. apparently in sacramento there is a recurring problem where turkeys have been chasing

joggers. have you heard about this? the situation is to bad a reporter went out there to investigate. and look what happened. >> reporter: oh, my god. okay, go away. go away. go away. oh, my god. i don't have a stick. holy crap. i mean -- sorry. all right, oh! no. stop. go away. go away! help! okay, he won't stop. ah! okay. thank you. it's so true. no! ah! >> he's coming back! >> jimmy: like the first

thanksgiving-themed horror movie. this thanksgiving, they are eating us. and by the way, if you are about to be murdered by a bird, don't tape it. it could be embarrassing. eventually, she found safety in her car. here. >> he is circles around my car. waiting for me to come out. oh, my god. there he is. waiting for me to get out of the car. >> jimmy: like whack a mole. hit that thing over the head and eat it. [ applause ] one more thing, i'm sure you are aware, halloween is three weeks away and there is a conservative christian group that wasn't like it. they are suggesting a

jesus-ween. they are encourages to pass out bibles instead of canadcandy. you will no which houses are passing out bibles. it doesn't sound like much fun more kids. but the organizers behind it released on online video that addresses it well. >> this october 31st join fuser the nationwide festival of jesus-ween. instead of pagan costumes, children wear white. instead of junk food, people give out bibles and free gifts. >> jesus-ween is a lot more fun than halloween. >> or jesse. >> who needs candy when you can have a bible? >> or heather?

>> kids who wear costumes are going to hell. >> celebrate jesus-ween. >> i'm a jesus-weenor. >> >> jimmy: we will be right back with paula abdul so stick around. [ applause ] ♪ [ cellphone rings ] cut! [ monica ] i have a small part in a big movie. i thought we'd be on location for 3 days, it's been 3 weeks. so, i used my citi simplicity card to pick up a few things. and i don't have to worry about a late fee. which is good...

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[ applause ] >> jimmy: hi, there, and welcome back. i hop you are ready for the single greatest night of your life. tonight, from "footloose," kenny

wormald is here. the old movie "footloose" has been killed. and then, can music from -- this is their latest album called "tourist history," two door cinema club from the bud light outside stage. tomorrow, don rickles will be here. john stamos will be on drums tomorrow. and the latest castoffs from "dancing with the stars." and later, john goodman and chris connell. the first guest tonight, a recording artist and the fredlyiest tv show. the new show is called "the x factor," watch it tuesdays and wednesdays on fox. please say hello to paula abdul. [ cheers and applause ]

it's great to see you. how you doing? >> wonderful. thank you. >> jimmy: you were free of simon. you could have livered out the rest of your days living in tucson under an alias and he could never have his clutches on you again. and yet there are you on tv. how about that? >> how about that? i wasn't thinking. you haven't said anything weird at all. honestly, i'm disappointed. >> well, thank you so much, i guess. >> jimmy: i like it when you say something and simon goes -- what? and you look at him -- >> he decided that he had to have a live audience at the auditions. and it's fantastic. when he tries to pretend, he can't understand -- the audience

is yelling. we understand. >> jimmy: are you in love with simon. >> no. >> jimmy: it's almost like sam and diane on cheers. it's like, they don't like each other. they don't like each over. why do you wind up back together. >> it's one of those strange -- we are strange ones. >> jimmy: he had a birthday last week. do you get him in a present -- how deep was then friendship go? >> it is hard getting him gifts. i got him a walker that is skroemed out. and it has hydraulics. and i said like in a rap video, simon. >> jimmy: to convince him it was cool. >> thank you.

and i got him a year supply of polident. and he loves the aviator sunglasses. and i had them custom made with sun glasses with the mirror on the inside. >> jimmy: so he can look at himself. that is clever. what are you doing when he called you up and he asked -- -- >> i was getting ready to jump off a cliff. no, it was three hours of eye left idol. and i got a call, i can't believe you do it. what am i going to do. >> jimmy: i see. >> no, the thing is, we have a

very funny but very transparent and an honest and weird relationship. and we got each other. >> jimmy: it does seem there is real affection there between you. and maybe more so than on idol. >> he has groan up a little. >> jimmy: i find that hard to believe. >> i said a little bit. >> jimmy: this week on "the x factor," the contestants are coming to your house. which seems like a terrible, terrible idea. sometimes they get mad and smash things. why do you allow them in your home? >> it was not my idea. and of course, i got the groups smoch that -- that is multiple people. >> jimmy: how many people did you have marching through your house? >> over half the allotment. over 32. >> jimmy: really, 32 people --

>> well, it's great. we shot most of it outdoors. >> jimmy: good, nothing was stolen. they didn't take a raft or anything. >> nothing was stolen. and i was smart enough to cover the address and i wrote in marker, simons address. >> jimmy: do you give these people advice? you kind of -- i mean, from our perspective, you became a huge star all of the sudden. do you talk to them about it? a lot of them become stars just from being on the show. >> you know, i think the best adviceky give them is to really absorb stuff. write down, document where it's your first. your first time, put it down in your diary. video record it. record the first time you heard your song on the radio. >> jimmy: do you remember the

first time you heard your song on the radio? . >> i will never forget it. >> jimmy: where were you? >> i was with any sistemy siste set boulevard. and tower records was there. and i could hear it at the next car. and i was like, how could they have the same -- >> jimmy: wow. >> and my sister said, turn on the radio. it was really exciting. >> jimmy: do you still get excited when you hear one of your songs on the radio? >> it never goes away. never goes away. >> jimmy: of course not. i heard a story i want to verify with you. mike the bolton. michael bolton was your

babysitter. true? >> true. hard to believe but true. and he had that hair. >> jimmy: he was a teenager and your parents hired mike the bolton -- >> interesting enough. and this is another power records reference. my sister was friends with mike the bolton and his girlfriend, marine. who later married. and my sister used to hang out with him. and he was an aspiring singer/song writer who flew from connecticut to l.a. to make it in song writing and as an artist. and i used to get pissed off as a brownie in a brownie outfit. and he never helped me do any home work. he used to want to jam with the musicians in my llg. and i had an "l" shaped couch. and i ran on my knees in the

couch and there was a pencil sticking up in the cushion. and i jammed in the leg and he had to take me to the hospital. i still have a scar on me knee from -- and he was so disinterested and really -- >> jimmy: really? >> and don't care. and years later, we move away. my sister -- and he used to sing me to sleep, which is sweet. and years later, and "straight up" has hit and we're on sunset boulevard. and my sister saying -- do you remember bollokin. that was his last name. they said, this is michael bolton and we turned the car around. went in to power records. we find his album and we got a phone call from my agent. and he said, i just got a call. mike the bolton wants to have

you maybe choreograph your tour. he wants to know are you the same bratty paula abdul that he used to babysit. and i said, you have to say no. and we went and met him late their day at 4:00 and he walked out and almost fainted. and i had to figure out how to choreograph -- >> jimmy: that is a fantastic story. i heard this afternoon. and we tracked michael bolton down. and when we come back, we have -- we're going to talk to him about your babysitting skills, which i think are lacking. paula abdul is here, "the x factor" wednesday and thursday nights on fox. we'll be back. 2 gigabytes of data. over t-mobile slows down your data speed. with sprint you don't get charged extra and you don't slow down. and you get unlimited data, text and calling to any mobile -- for only $79.99.

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>> jimmy: we're back. paula abdul is was. paula, we learned something shocking. paula, when she was 7 years old, her babysitting was michael bolton and we tracked mike the bolton down. and he is with us now. hi. >> how you doing? >> jimmy: michael just got off stage in south dakota and is with us. can you confirm you were paula's babysitter? >> i don't know what she is talking about. yes. we -- we were hanging out with wendy, with her sister.

and we couldn't leave her alone. she was too young. >> but you left me along all the time. look what happened to me. >> i am like a bad babysitter. it was not my job. someone else's responsibility. >> jimmy: you have to be held accountable for your actions. we also tracked down the pencil that went into paula. >> now that is scare write. >> yeah, i was crying like a baby. >> jimmy: well, you were a baby. >> you were adorable. i don't remember you being that much of a brat. >> jimmy: because you were singing with friends in the building. >> you used to say, shake it up baby, and twist and move. >> how do you remember that? >> jimmy: what do you remember? was she good? >> she was adorable. she is still.

i don't remember any pencils. >> jimmy: you don't remember pencils. do you remember driving her to the hospital? >> she is confusing that with ice cream. we took her out for ice cream. >> yeah, pencil jammed and blood, and ice cream. >> jimmy: she can't file suit against you. >> yes, she did have a pencil in here leg. >> seriously, just the expression on your face when sister and my were there. and then the friend sthap we were able to get going as -- >> jimmy: a friendship that is now over as far as i'm concerned shinchts is a sweet heart. and she was a brownie and now she is a super star and still a real person and she is adorable. >> michael, i love you too. i love you too. >> jimmy: greet seat to see you. mike the bolton, everyone.

the worst babysitting. and michael has a new album out. the duets collection. hollywood is weird. you can see it on "the x factor" wednesday and thursday nights at 8:00 on the fox network. paula abdul, everybody. back with kenny wormald. my "me time" is when i thought i parked on level 2. or maybe 8? my me time...is when everybody's takin' shots at me.

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>>. >> this week on "jimmy kimmel live" -- john nams, don rickles, rob lowe and latest castoff from "dancing with the stars" and music from peter yorn and chris carnell. the "jimmy kimmel live" concert series sponsored by --

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>> jimmy: we are back. still to come, two door cinema club. our next guest has one burning desire -- and that is to cut loose and kick off his sunday shoes. his new movie is a remake of the movie "footloose." it oips this theaters friday. please welcome kenny wormald. [ applause ] ♪ >> jimmy: well, congratulations, you have gone from those who don't know your background to backup dancer to movie star. that is a leap. >> they are letting me talk. >> jimmy: what do you dance with? a lot of big star? >> justin timberlake, chris brown. >> jimmy: with madonna, i heard.

>> i danced with madonna. >> >> jimmy: did she attempt to make love to you? >> i wish. >> jimmy: what was the best -- >> dancing with justin was the best. i tried to learn his moves back home. it was terrible. >> jimmy: starting at what age, do you think? >> i liked 'nsync, i will admit it. >> jimmy: you are young enough that is acceptable. i took my kids to see them and i was impressed. >>dy tap and ballet and those things. >> jimmy: how do you get started? >> i went to a new kids on the block concert. they were from boston, and they were huge. they were like the beatles. >> jimmy: yeah, no, but okay.

>> in boston, they were. in boston they were. i was wearing the patterned pants that had the velcro on it. you know? >> jimmy: what are those called in. >> i called them the jamming pants. and i thought i was the coolest guy on the planet and i turned to me jumping on the furniture. >> jimmy: taking lessons. >> well, it was messing around the house and my parents signed me up for a dance class. >> jimmy: did they think, we should medicate this kid? >> yeah, no, but my friends, they did. >> jimmy: they had to take a pill? >> yeah. >> jimmy: your parents are supportive of this? >> yeah. absolutely supportive.

and my dad is like, as long as he doesn't have to wear tights but i did ballet so i had to wear tights. >> jimmy: with you super heroes wear tights. >> yeah. >> jimmy: are your parents excited in. >> yeah, we had a big premiere for "footloose." and i had been to a few premiers, but nobody cared i was there. and this is my moment. and the paparazzi is going crazy. creaming my name and my mom is just wide eyed and my dad is fighting back the tears. and i was doing interviews and they were like, is your family here? and i was like, uh-oh. and she handled herself well. >> jimmy: how about your dad?

>> he just stood there. >> jimmy: did they embarrass you in any way? >> my dad was like, can i get a picture with ryan seacrest? he is dating julianne? >> jimmy: did he get the picture? >> yeah. >> >> jimmy: where is the picture now? >> my dad has facebook. and so does my grammy. i have to watch what i say. >> jimmy: that is write. i always tell me, start writing things down. remember your first -- wait a minute. that is what paula abdul does. i'm confused [ applause ] now the movie, after doing it, was in 85,000 movies. >> yeah more than that.

>> jimmy: you have spoken to him? >> no, i haven't. i am very proud of the film. we stayed really true to the original film and hopefully kevin loves it. >> jimmy: you didn't have a torch passing moment where he handed you the shoes? >> no, man, i wish. i had a dream the other day i met him. i was in my front yard and he met him. and i was like, no way. and he was like, no way. and that is all i remember. >> jimmy: i have a fweeling that dream is going to come true. good luck with the movie. kenny wormald, "footloose" opens friday. we'll be right back with two door cinema club. => áp

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♪ i can't tell if it's what you want ♪ ♪ you don't want to be alone ♪ you don't want to be alone ♪ and i can't say it's what you know but you've known me for some time ♪ ♪ yeah you've known me that whole time ♪ ♪

♪ in a few weeks i will get time to realize it's right before my eyes ♪ ♪ and i can take it if it's what i want to do ♪ ♪ i am leaving this is starting to feel like it's right before my eyes ♪ ♪ and i can taste it it's my sweet beginning ♪ ♪ and i can tell just what you want you don't want to be alone you don't want to be alone ♪ ♪ and i can't say it's what you know but you've known it the whole time ♪ ♪ yeah, you've known it the whole time ♪

♪ maybe next year i'll have no time to think about the questions to address ♪ ♪ am i the one to try to stop the fire ♪ ♪ i wouldn't test you i'm not the best you could have attained why try anything ♪ ♪ i will get there just remember i know ♪ ♪ and i can tell just what you want you don't want to be alone you don't want to be alone ♪ ♪ and i can't say it's what you know but you've known it the whole time ♪ ♪ yeah, you've known it the whole time ♪