live." dicky: from hollywood it's "jimmy kimmel live"! tonight -- justin theroux -- from "scanda" scott foley -- "this week in unnecessary censorship" -- and music from duran duran, with cleto and the cletones, and now, as s far as inow, here's jimmy kimmel! [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: hi, everybody. i'm jimmy, i'm host of th show. thanks for watching. thanks for coming.

thanks for everything. very nice. i appreciate tt. i don't know how many of you are here as urists. for those who are visiting us from other states this the may have been a confusing day today. today we have what they call the great shakeout. it's anmergency earthquake drill. it's a worldwide thing. they say 22 million people participated in it today. i had no idea it was happening. i'm sitting in my oice looking out from my office, looks over the of course field, hollywood high school. all of a sudden a thousand kids come rushing out of the school. what the hell's going on over there? somebody said, it's the fake earthquake they're having. hey, do you know what to do if there is an earthquake? in the event of an earthquake, first thing you do is twtweet it. then you got to instagram, then facebook. and then, then you get under a desk. this is what you're supposed to do. if you feel the ground start to move, go under a table and do yoga. those are also my instrucons

for lovemaking, by the way. really the best way to survive an earthquake is to move too place that doesn't ever have them. but if the big one does hit, don't run. they say don't rub, you can get hurt. if thehere's an earthquake, try to contact your nearest dwayne johnson. and he will help you, he ll save you. the dodgers are playing the mets right now. not too far from here. the winner of the game tonight goes on to play the chicago cubs. the cubs are favored to win the world series. what could possibly go wrong? [ cheers and applause ] the cubs haven't won a world series since 1908. if the cubs w the world series, dononald trum is going to win the election, right? [ lahter ] the royals beat the astros last night in kansas city.. they will play the blue jays for the american league title. i watched the game and this is something that really bothers me. it used to be that after a big win in the playfs, players would go back to the locker room, they'd spray chaagne all over each other. now this is the royals' locker room from last night. they're getting the champagne ready. everything is covered in plastic.

the lockers, the floor, all covered in plastic. as if dexter is about to come in and murder the first base coach. and not only is everything totally covered, the players you can see are putting goggles on to protect -- what's the point of even doing this anymore? look this guy has a snorkel on. how much champagne are they planning to pour? it seems weird to me to prepare for a postgame celebration the same way your grandma protects her couch. look at that. like a party at howie mandel's house. [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: i was thinking about this last night, i'd like to see video of the other locker room where the equipment managers have to rush to take all the plastic down before the losing team gets back in. this is pretty great. this is from the seventh inning of the blue jays/rangers game last night. young fan was imitating his hero, blue jays slugger jose

series-winning home run. >> jimmy: the lucky beard now. you can never watch that often enough. looks like he drew it with a sharpie, i don't know if he'll be ae to wash it off. he'll look like fred flintstone until christmas. stbucks is adding a new feature to their drive-through locations, video screens. so that way you can see the person misspell your name on the cup while it's happening. video screens will be added t to 2,400 starbucks which i think is how many we have othis block. a spokesman said this is about th customer/barista connection which as you know is the most sacred connection of all. i don't know if i like that. i'm n comfortable video chatting with my parents.

talking through the speaker seems fine. starbucks is hoping this will be grande improvement on their service. maybe even a venti improvement in the qlity of service. i like the old way of getting coffee. you walk into a store, find the guy with the nose ring, ask him to put hot dirt water in a cup. democratic presidential hopeful bernie sanders, the senator, was on "ellen" today. a lot of people,myself includedsaid bernie sanders doesn't have the style or the charisma to be esident. but he came out dancing on "ellen." i think we owe him an apology. it's all right it's okay they may look the other way >> >> jimmy: is that thnically dancing? it's like he's a real-life vine video.

bernie sanders isn't the first oddld man to run for president. pat robertson, long have time host of "the 700 club," ran in 1988. spoiler alert, he didn't win. went back to the show, hosted the show for 43 years, since 1972. and over the course of that time pat has shared so much insight into the human condition, you almost wish he was running today. tonight we've compiled some of that insight in our latest installment of "the collected wisdom of pat robertson." >> marijuana is a vegetable. black beans, brown beans. "karate kid." heaven is for real. "annie." strip clubs. whips. like a piece of meat. women are objects. cocaine is a proct of a getable. these girls are just a commodity. arrest them, let the pimps go free.

alcohol is a product of a vegetable. it's about bondage, it's about whwhips, it' about boiling oil, look, i'll pay $500 if you'll dance here, all you got to do is take your top off and dance around a little bit. guess what? crack cocaine. people are enslaved to getables. i'm a fan of beans. all kinds of beans. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: he makes a hell of a taco salad. thank you, pat. next week we're taking our show lock, stocock and guillermo, to brooklyn brooklyn, new york, for a week of shows at bamp. you know what bamp stands for? >> guillermo: no. >> jimmy: stands for -- the first word is, b? >> guillermo: b. >> jimmy: i'm not asking you to spell bamp, do you know what it stands for? >> guillermo: bamp? >> jimmy: remember we did the show there a whole week t last time? >> guillermo: it's something with music, no? >> jimmy: yes.

music. b.a.m. >> guillermo: oh, okay, i got it. >> jimmy: it's a big, beautiful, 2,000-seat opera house. tickets are sold out because my ther invited everyone he's ever made eye contact with to the show. we have great guguests. howard stern, bill murray,racy morgan, jay-z, donald trump, michael j. fox, bradley cooper, and many, many more. i'm excid. has anyone who like me h has lived in both new york and los angeles knows, people in those cities have strong opinions about one another. so we decided to tap into some of that. we ask pedestrians on the streets of l.a. and on the streets of new york a simple question. we asked, tell us what peoplee from the other city are like. and the result is this. it's round two of "l.a. versus new york." >> what are people from l.a. like? >> very laid back. >> laid back?

>> very laid back. somebody acrcross theall was in l.a. and very nonchalant, go with the flow. very different than here. >> oh, wow. i don't know. i think they're a little bit more conceited than we are, possibly. >> kind of stuck up a little bit. >> stuck up? >> yeah. snobbish. >> yeah? >> snooty. >> i see them all the time sitting outside doing nothing. >> they tend to be a little bit more shallow. new yorkers are real. they can be real scumbags, they can be real jerks, but they're real. >> what is your impression of people from new york. >> honestly, from my experience, they're a little rude. i mean, kind of pushy, shovy, always in the way. kind of get where they're going real quickly. i don't rlly like them. >> they're very -- i feel they're very snob by, very rude, very fast, d't want to stop and talk to you. >> they like to be [ bleep ] to each other. >> a lot of them are very nasty, short. they're rude.. kind of goes with the city. trash on every street corner. it's not exactly my favorite city.

l.a.'s a much nicer city. >> what does your wife think? [ laughter ] [ chrs and applause ] >> jimmy: they've made it work for 22 years, god bless them. when we come back our viewers reveal what they really think about their bosses. tomorrow's national bosses day. and "this week in unnecessary censorship" too. stick around, we'll be right back! [ cheers and applause ] i'm not a fan of putting my personal info in these online shopping forms. hellloooo??? don't have time to be filling out my address, i need to be buying a dress. that's why i use masterpass. less typing, more dancing. sfx: tango music como te llamas? yo soy camarones. dip me. the easier way to shop online. masterpass from mastercard and your bank.

isn't it beautiful when t things ju come together? build a beautiful website with squarespace. all the hard work... time in the service... community college... it matters. it's why we, at university of phoenix, count your relevant work and college experience as credits toward your degree.

the all-new tacoma. toyota. let's go places. wuuuuuuuuuuuuu?! guess who's having mcdonald's brkfast for dinner 2night? we're guessing you, leigha wondergem. it's time for all day breakfast at mcdonald's.

which means you can access your dvr at the dmv. change channels while he changes pants. you don't have to be a couch potato, you can be a train potato! and t them watch all the shows they love, inside the ride that you really kind of hate. introducing the all in one plan.

[ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: welcome back to the show. justin theroux, scott foley, duran duran on the way. tomorrow is national bosses bay. bosses day was started in 1958 the office kiss ass. it's a great way to say thank

request. guillerm what are you getting me for bosses day? anything? >> guillmo: we're going toew york. >> jmy: yeah? >> guillermo: pizza and tech keel what. >> jimmy: oh, pizza and tequila, two thgs new york is known for. in the spirit of the national bosses day we went on the street, we asked pedestrians to tell us what they really think about their boss. to make them feel comfortable we disguised them, handed them masks to ensure that they told us nothing but the truth, the whole truth, and that's it. fromom this b bosses day edition of "hide and speak." >> okay, jason, tomorrow is nationalosses day. you're completely anonymous. tell us what you reall feel about your boss. you're controlling [ bleep ]. and you make my life miserable. clippers feel the same way? can you hold up your a arm whe you talk like lady liberty?

tell us how you really feel about your boss. >> my boss is a bitch. a six-month holiday away from her is still not long enough. >> my boss is a jerk. his name is lighter and he thinks he's cocool. he's nothing but a jerk. >> keep your manhood in your pants, it's appropriate for a boss and you need to stop it. >> keep it in your trousers, spence. >> my boss so is controlling, when we eat they order for me and don't let me pick off the menu. it gets so aggravating that i'm forced to eat something that i don't even like. >> tell us what you really feel about your boss. >> i think she's the biggest bitch. to tell you the truth, sometimimes she's my frnd, sometimes she's not. sometimes i think she's never going to invite me to work for her again. >> what do you to? >> makeup and special effects in studio. >> i see. she's in australia? >> she is. >> she's not watching right now? >> i hope not. >> all right. let's take this off. weave nothing to wry about. are we on in australia? oh, we are?

all right. >> working at a pizza place, you make me pay for my drinks, make me work overtime, i never get days off, i want to tatsse you in the neck. >> tomorrow is national bosses day, wearing a horse's head, tell us what you feel about your boss. >> i know and everyone else at the bar knows that you've been selling cocaine over the bar to try and impress the other chicks. you piece of [ bleep ]. >> wow. that's something. straight from the horse's mouth. >> her name is deborah and want to tell her,rush your teeth, you drink too much coffee. garg, chew gum. you speak very loud, too close to people, it's rude and no one likes it. >> [ bleep ] her. she's so psycho. i swear too you. the other day -- can i tell you a story? >> sure, go ahead. >> she tells me if i'm'm sk the next day not to come in, to not get her sick. &-pso idn't.

and i texted her in the morning. i was like, i'm not coming. she comes the next day when i'm here a she's like writing me up. oh, you didn't say the words "i'm not coming." so just like technicality? susuch a [ bep ]. she's really crazy. >> she's nuts. >> [ bleep ] to everyone at the store. we're all sick of her. >> you're literally sick of her. >> yeah. she posted on instagram, i have an interview this week. so hopefully she's leaving soon. >> you know how i can get you unlimited sick days? >> how? oh! >> there you go. >> okay, thank you. >> don't text her anymore. >> [ bleep ]. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: everyone's looking for a sick leave rabbit head girl with a potty mouth, i know someone who's available. it's thursday night which means it's time to bleep and blur the big tv moments of the wee whether they need it or not. it is "this week in unnecessary censorship."

enjoy. >> it's the political hangover. today we try to piece together what in the [ bleep ] happened last night in vegas. >> we need to be committed to making it possible for every child to live up to his or her [ bleep ] potential. >> how did billy sanders do? >> in the room he was like a stinky [leep ], right? >> i want you to pic me up one time and turn me upside down like you do those other girls. >> it was about principle and bringing -- >> thank you. >> [ bep ] you. >>hey tried to reverse a direct [ bleep head. >> looks like things are going to get dicey. you're going to have to get your big [ bleep ] out. >> the last several years as i traveled around the country [ bleep ]ing guys and so forth -- >> it's part of my being. i love [ bleep ], [ bleep ] a lot. >> were you [ bleep ] as a child? >> what? >> were you [ bleep ] as a child? the ason i'm asking -- >> actually, yes. >> give me all the money in that

uh -- and a belt too! i'll give you a [ bleep ] in the eye! >> jimmy: nice. we have music from duran duran. from "scandal," scott foley is here. we'll be right back with justin theroux so s stick arod! [ cheers and applause ] >> dicky: portions of "jimmy kimmel live" are brought to you by sam adams. delicious octoberfest get it while it lasts. sam adams, for the love of beer. all of our legendary racing heritage. all of our pioneering four wheel drive experience. come together in one amazing new vehicle. this is the all-new gle coupe.

what makes thermacare different? two word it heals. how? with heat. unke creams and rubs thatt mask t pain, therermaca hasatented heat cells that penetrate deep to increase circulatation andaccelerate healing. let's review: heat, plus relief, plus healing, equals thermacare.

[ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: hi, there. tonight from "scandal," scott foley is re. later, their new album is "paper gods." duran duran from the samsung outdoor stage. next week we are takinghe show to brooklyn. five shows at the brookn academy of music which is what, guilillermo? called what? >> guillermo: brooklyn academy -- >> jimmy: that i just said. guillermo: yeah. b.a.m. >> jimmy: thank you very much. we will have names such as bill rray, michael j. fox, donald trump, howard stern, bradley cooper, jay- tracy morgan, misty copeland the ballerina, ryan ads, esperanza spalding, public enemy, paul shaffer sitting in with the cletones. all of those people will be there. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: please join us starting monday all week. the first guest is a talented actor, director, and writer wh two of the most prized side burns in all of show business. he stars on one of the best

shows on tv. watch "the leftovers" sundays at 9:00 on hbo. please welme justin theroux!x! [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: how are you doing? >> good. >> jimmy: very good to see you. you look very handsome as always. >> likewise? you got married, congratulations. >> yes. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: it makes sense t that you as the groom in a wedding would be asked about it repeatedly but do you have any idea how often people ask me about your wedding? >> i have some idea. >> jimmy: every single conversation starts with that. because i was there. and i never say anything. i act as if i -- i won't even tell them what we ate. what the meal was. >> you can. >> jimmy: i am fort knox, i keep everything very quiet. >> why?

>> jimmy: you wanted it private. >>e wanted it to be a private event. >> jimmy: you did a good job keeping it very private. there's only one little detail from the wedding that you reveals on "good morning america." and it was that i cried at the wedding. [ laughter ] the one piece of information! that you let escape from this wedding! >> it's true, it's true. >> jimmy: i know it's true! >> tell them! >> jimmy: yeah, yeah. >> i want people to know that you have a tender heart. >> jimmy: thank you, yes. yeah, me people have a diffent way of describing it. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: true or false, i had to forceou to have a bachelor party? >> not force me. >> jimmy: bully? >> bullied me. >> jimmy: bullied, yeah. >> kept e-mailing me, dude, you've got to have a bachelor party. >> jimmy: i was going to have it with or without you. >> i know. i was shooting, he was going to come to austin, we'll do whatever youwant, a vegas thing. i was working. i was like, i can't do it, i don't want a bachelor party. when i got to l.a. you're like,

we're doing this the night before. so i said, great. you were very -- you said what do you want? this, like this? >> jimmy: balloons? >> i said, let's get the guys together, have some beers and really good food, a adam made great steaks -- >> jimmy: adam lang perry made steaks and it was the most g-rated -- > i swed up at jimmy'shouse. and molly answered the door hoholding by jane. >> jimmy: my wife and baby were at your bachelor party. >> i know. and then they were like, we're going to leave you guys alone, i'm going to put jane down. then basically they went upstairs to go to sleep. we were all having a quiet bachelor party. >> jimmy: it was a quiet bachelor party. >> this was a baby upstairs sleeping. >> jimmy: i don't want to mention names but billy crudup, the actor, actually fell asleep on the couch during the bachelor party. that's how wild it got. >> exactly. got so drunk. he got tired? he was just tired. >> jimmy: now that you're married, are you an easy person to live with?

>> yes. i think i'm an easy person to live with. i have like weird -- like things that i collect. there's certain things that i can have either -- that belong in my office or certain things in the the house. i have this collection when i moved to l.a. i brought a lot of it here that didn't necessarily jive with jen's style. >> jimmy: yeah. that's common, though. seems that nothing jives -- nothing of mine jives with my wife's style and it's being item machi eliminated. as the days go on. >> as the days go on. >> jimmy: what made it? what did you have that didn't make it? >> i had -- i used to collect odd medical curio. things like dental instruments or teeth. teeth occasionally. >> jimmy: human teeth? >> human teeth. >> jimmy: how many of them did you have? >> actually, i'd gone and gotten a root canal from my dentist who will remain nameless. i i said, i want the feet.teeth. it was not a root canal, wisdom

teeth. she gave them to me and they're beautiful, look like pearls, have roots on them. >> jimmy: we've all seen teeth. >> i was going -- yeah, but not out of your own head. >> jimmy: true. it is weird. they should offer those to you. >> then i said to her/him, look, i would love -- can i get more of these? she'd slip me these little bags of teeth. there would be a biomedical warning. don't worry, i steamed them. i'd put them in a dish on the coffee table. >> jimmy: anybody thinks it's a mint and popped it? >> they reach over and get it close to their face, oh! that's n an altoid! >> jimmy: that did not make it? >> that did not. >> jimmy: you brought something that did? >> i have a new thing that i'm obsessed with. i was on reddit or went to some k-hole and found there's a thing that exists called dental mannequins. >> jimmy: dental mannequins?

>> thehey're m mea for dentists who basically -- >> jimmy: who have clothing stores? >> you practice on dental mannequins. >> this is a real thing? >> this is the first one i bought. the firs one of my collection. >> jimmy: this is in your home? >> it's in my home. >> jimmy: your wife is nicer than mine for sure. >> looks like i'm practicing on myself. >> jimmy: this looks like a rapper skull. this could be lil john's skull. you keep this in y yourficece? > yeah, and hopefully i'll accrue nine more. >> jimmy: yeah, you should get two of them, maybe they'll mate. maybe you'll have a bunch of little things. >> i love it. >> that's a lovely item. i was going to get you one of these as a wedding gift -- >> now you know what to get. it's almost christmas. >> jimmy: we're going to take a break. we have a couple of special things prepared. i don't want to tip the audience off. just tun theroux is here. "the leftovers," watch it sunday

nights on hbo. we'll be right back. [ cheers and applause ] >> dicky: portions of "jimmy kimmel live" are brought to you by columbia sportswear. gear that't's testedough in the pacific northwest. advertise your eyes! supersize your lashes. hypnotize the guys! covergirl's super sizer mascara with the amazing lash styler brush. it loads on. combs through. for dramatic volume. corner to corner. volumize. mesmerize. supersize your lashes. advertise your eyes! e super sizer. new from easy, breezy, beautiful. covergirl and try new intensify me! liner

now, you're free to start enjoying the breakfast you love any time you wish. no way. introducing mcdonald's new all day breakfast menu. once, you changed how you ate eakfast. it's time to start changing when. can't afford to let heartburn get in the way? try nexium 24hr, now the #1 selling brand for frequent heartburn. get complete protection with the new leader in frequent heartbururn.

fact. advil pain relievers are used by more households than any other leading brand. to treat their aches and pains more people reach for advil. relief doesn't get any better than this. advil. (nature sounds) she can rage, and roar, and crack, and storm. but mother nature can't stop us. the new 2016 ford explorer.

there is a rhythm that beats inside all of us, and it whispers, "be bold. be an artist. a titan of business." it says, " "make mus." "inspire." "be a hero." we all have greatness in us, and with the right tools, there are no limits to where your rhythm will take you. introducing the ultimate laptop.

tt2watv#`8t bt@q'e@ tt2watv#`8t "a@q7i$ tt2watv#`8t bm@q

it was empty. i saw w another r coming. and it was john. the neighbor. his son was with him. i think my phone is probably up there. they're going to find him. i think she tell the cop >> tell them what? you just say you don't remember anything before you woke up in the exact spot where our neighbor's daughter and her two friends disappeared from? >> jimmy: justin theroux in "the leftovers." i got to tell you -- [ cheers and applause ] i think this season, there's only been two episodes, but i love that youuys moved and it's really been interesting and excellent. >> i think it's -- i'm not just saying this because that's the show i love -- i think it's a strong, strong, strong season. we've had -- and we just got the finale so i know the whole arc c the thing. it's gorgeous. >> jimmy: it's reallyly, really, really good. i mean, i know people -- if you

don't know what's going on there, but knowing what's going on there, knowing that it's happening next week, i very, very interesting to . becaususe we rlly don't know if you're completely off your rocker or not. we genuinely have no idea. >> you will find out if i am or am not. >> jimmy: are you going to take it easy now? >> i wish i could. just last friday i think we finish the finale flew back to los angeles. but now with awards season coming i have to start basically sort of -- >> jimmy: the emmys? >> no, this is -- i'm hoping -- this year we're going for th-- >> jimmy: for "zoolander 2"? >> no, i did a -- i bought the rights to this amazing viral video. >> jimmy: you bought the rights to a viral video? really? you can buy the rights? >> if you can contact the people. i got the rights to it. and we shot -- >> jimmy: which viral video was it? >> i don't know if you know it. the drunk yukon kid looking for macaroni and cheese? >> jimmy: yes, yes. >> i bought that.

i was interested in the character. and wanted to explore that. >> jimmy: do we have that? do we have e a clilip of that? yes, we do? okay what a coincidence. let's look at that. >> [ bleep ] jaleno mac and cheese. >> oh my god! >> let me get my shoes! >> jus relax. >> what the [ bleep ] happened to my shoes! >> jimmy: it's a crazy video. that kid made a video apologizing. >> i saw the apology as well. that might be our sequel. >> jimmy: buy the rits to to that one too. when will you start shooting? >> walready shot it. >> jimmy: you shot it? >> we cut our firirst trailer. >> jimmy: you cut the trailer already? >> the trailer already. >> jimmy: i wish you'd brought that. >> i did. >> jimmy: you did bring it. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: maybe we should show to it the audience. >> do you want to see it? [ cheers and applause ] >> all right.

>> jimmy: here it is. >> you can't come in here with an open container of alcohol. >> can you just give me some mac and cheese? >> go to subway. >> can you just give me some bacon [ bleep ] jalapeno mac and cheese you [ bleep ] idiot! >> okay. no. >> why? i'm hungry. oh, hey. >> yeah, yeah. >> oh, is? okay, so -- >> from columbi pictures and kraft macaroni and cheese -- >> we've got a code 4, drunk and stupid, at the student union. >> on my way. >> just give me my food. i don't see the issue. no, no, no! >> nobody touches my box!

>> my shoes! where are my shoes! >> david koechner. >> a student favorite. >> and jimmy kimmel as the cafetea lady. >> take it outside if you're going to fight. if you're going to fight, take it outside. >> "mad mac." hunger is no game. mac and cheese [ cheers and applause ] >> j jimmy: i s in that? >> you shot a little bit of that. >> jimmy: justin theroux, everybody. "leftovers" sundays at 9:00 on hbo. be right back with scott foley from "scandal." [ cheers and applause ] which changes how you read a text. read an email. readhe news. wait you read the news? kid: yep of course you do. the camera shoots 4k video now. and selfies have changed.

that's gonna get, like, a million likes. selena: thanksks. actually, photos themselves have changed. they move now.

it's olive garden's 20th anniversary of never ending pasta bowl. so we're celebrating by offering you over 20 delicious choices starting at $9.99. lilike creamnew pesto alfredo, or crispy chicken fritta. plus unlimited salad and breadsticks. for a limited time. at olive garden. all the hard work... time in the service... community college... it matters. it's why we, at university of phoenix, count your relevant work and colle experience as credits toward your degree. learn more at phoenix.edu. it's the way we craft the subway chicken & bacon ranch melt that sets it apartrt. tender, all-white-meat chicken, crispy bacon, monterey cheddar, and cool, creamy ranch, on freshly baked bread. it's irresistible goodness that leads to nothin' but happines

that's a first-rate queso dip haven been this lost in years (gps) recalculating shortest route do i really look like this? never seen this one before chicken parm you taste so good i like it.

>> jimmy: still to come, music from duran duran. "scandal" fans made shocking discoveries about our next ess character. his name the not jake and he spy. and he's a man. watch him thursday nights at 9:00 on abc. he's welcome scott foley!

>> jimmy: how are yo >> very well, h a you? >> jimmy: doing well. family, kids? you have three kids? >> i have three kids. i'm tired. >> jimmy: the kids are young? >> yeah, i have a 5-year-old daughter and two sons, 3 and 11 months. >> jimmy: oh, boy. wow. >> that's a lot. there's a lot going on in my house. >> jimmy: do you find yourself in a situation where you are alone wiwithll three of the children? i hadn't until -- it's funny. aboutwo, three weeks ago my wife decided she'd had enough. >> jimmy: of you? >> of the whole kit and caboodle. she went on a girls' trip. live leaving me home alone with all three children. >> jimmy: the dreaded girls' trip. >> it's terrifying. a guys' trip, guy to work, that's enough of a guys' trip. >> jimmy: no nannies? >> n nannies. because i work, we have help during the week. but i like to spe time with my kids. we don't have help on the

weekends. and tt can be a problem when you're by yourself. it was a lot. >> jimmy: yeah. >> there's something that happens, though, when m men -- i go into a stbucks,right? i see a woman walk in, a mom walk in, with three kids. i'm like, god, i've got to go, this is going to take forever. a guy walks in with three kids? pele take my kids. oh, you're a hero! it's amazing. >> really. oonchts are. >> it's amazing. the props i got with the neighborhood moms. i took the kids, there was a birthday party, i took them all. the fathers were like, god, what are you doing, you're killing us! >> jimmy: that's right. >> you're killing us! the moms are like, you're great! >> jimmy: there's a couple things. first of all, you're handsome. that's why they're helpi. >> oh, thanks. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: most people walk in with tee kids, get your filthy kids away from me! >> i don't know. >> jimmy: also they probably are trying to shame their husbands for not going off with the three kids. >> there's a lotf that. look how good he is, how come you can't do it?

>> jimmy: righght. >> then -- >> jimmy: then you're the rye. >> i was the guy, i'm never going there again. >> jimmy: you made the rounds, you don't need to be the guy again. >> i got something in the jar i can use whenever i want. >> jimmy: this i the current issue of "entertainment weekly." the 25th anniversary. >> look at that. >> jimmy: and you are -- [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: you are a specialist. i didn't realize until later. you're like a love triangle specialist. >> it's what i do. >> jimmy: between this show and "scandal." >> ensembles and love triangles. >> jimmy: i know -- do you hang around with keri russell or whatever? >> kerry lives in new york. when we got together for this photo shoot, first time i'd seen her fins the last day we shot on "felicity" 14 years ago. >> jimmy: so you're not close. >> we're close. we just don't see each other or talk, ever. >> jimmy: one of the best relationships. >> you can never screw it upup.

it's amazing to be a part of a show that people still have font memories of. >> jimmy: you were like the w.b. teen show. was that a fun thing to be that guy? >> yeah. you know, i didn't know i was that guy. wehot the first season, which i think was 13 episodes. and it got some heat. and by the time we started promoting the second season, we were in new york at a dean and delucca doing aadio interview. at one point we turned around. outside the window were hundreds of teenage rls. and i thought, oh, god, what have i done? >> jimmy: what? >> and i thought, oh, god,, this could be kind of cool! >> jimmy: what did you think you might have done?e? >> i was so young, i had no idea. but life changes. you never know what you're going to run into. you always want to be on a show or want people to pay attention to what you do. and when they do, it's such a strange feeling. but it was a good feeling. >> yeah, sure.

after the photo shoot, how long did the photo shoot take in the whole thing? >> the photo shoot for this was a day, maybe. >> jimmy: a day. >> yes. six hours. >> jimmy: six hours? for this? >> believe it or not. >> jim: i could have got this done immediately. >> we're substantially older than in that. >> jimmy: afterwards you go, we've got to get together, that kind of thing? >> there wasn't any of that. >> jimmy: there w wasn't. [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: i lik that. >> no, gooto see you. >> jimmy: tally ho >> see you in 15 more years. >> jimmy: your old girlfriend on "scandal" is back with the president again. >> she is. >> jimmy: i don't know how much i should say. butt it s on telesion. so i will say that your ex, ex-wife? >> yes. we find out in the episode that airs tonight, or aired tonight, that jake is/was married to another b-613 agent. it was a great revelation for any character. one that i -- >> jimmy: you didn't know?

>> i had no idea until we'd had the table read. you've got a wife! >> jimmy: and she said -- i saw she said, oh, jake is the name you're going by now? >> yeah, and i said -- her name was mia or somemething. and i said, you're going by that name? >> jimmy: it was something else other than mia. >> alise. thank you so much. alise. mia maestro is the actress. >> jimmy: i see, okay. >> good lord. >> jimmy: do you know what your character -- whatt jake real name is now? >> i have no idea. you know, the writers throw things at us. you sort of make it up as you go along. by have no idea. >> jimmy: you play a character whose name you do not know? >> fake name. >> jimmy: you don't kno the real name? >> no idea. >> jimmy: you're going to be directing an episode of "scandal." when are you doing that? >> t 15th or 16th episode of the season. >> jimmy: that's something you're excited about? >> it is, yeah. i've directed television before. and some other things. and this is something i'm looking forward to. it's a friendly casting crew. i think i'll have a lot of support.

>> jimmy: you guys do this. some of the cast members direct. >> tony has directed numerous episodes. tony tony's been a feature and television director it's nice to have someone who knows what they're doing. >> jimmy: when he directs the show is it different for you than when it's just a regular director? >> yeah, it can be. beuse we have a working relationship as actors, it can be different. but ty also -- because we're in this love triangle with keri, i wouldn't say any real competition but there's some -- we sort ofoke around with each other. any time tony directs, say there's a kissing scene with keri, it's amazing how quickly we'll kiss and tony is like, cut, cut! ju like that. however, when tony's directing himself making out with ke. i? watch keri's face. he just lets that take go on and on and on. >> jimmy: there's nobody to yell "cut" when your tongue is down someone's throat. >> there's no real tongue. it's televisioion kissing.

>> no, there's no -- maybe a little bit. [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: scott foley, everybody. "scandal" thursday nights on abc. we'll be right back with duran duran! [ cheers and applause ] >> dicky: the "jimmy kimmel live" concert series is presented by samsung. don't miss tonight's stream on yahoo! presented by mastercard featuring exclusive concerts from duran duran.

after the show to see it all. >> dicky: the "jimmy kimmel live" concert series presented by samsung. >> jimmy: i'd like to thank justin theroux, scott foley and apologize to matt damon, we ran out of time. "nightline" is next but first you can see this full concert at yahoo.com their album is called "paper gods" here with the song "pressure off." duran duran! steppin' out steppin' out steppin' out and jumpin' up

and steppin' out steppin' out steppin' out and jumpin' up and steppin' out steppin' out steppin' out and jumpin' up and pressure off pressure off pressure pressure pressure off past is another country the presenent will ner last the future it's still tomorrow are we living too fast searchlight the crowd i'm fixed on your face i know it well but it's a dream i can't place something is happening to me maybe it's happening to you you you you everybody everywhere feel it in the air oh yeah it's time to take the pressure off

everybody everywhere step o into the future it's time to take the pressure off oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh it's up to you now it's time to take the pressure off oh oh oh oh oh oh oh o oh oh oh 's up to you now it's time to take the pressure off steppi steppin' steppin' it's time to take the pressure off swimming with the rat race or running against the tide it's everybody's business when there's nowhere to hide searchlight the crowd i'm fixed o onto youout of this in the blue

something is happening to me maybe it's happening to you you you you everybody everywhere feel it in the air oh yeah oh yeah it's time to take the pressure off everybody everywhere step out into the future it's time to take the presre off oh oh ooh oh oh oh oh oh oh it's up to you now it's time to take the pressure off oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh it's up to you now m it't's time ttake the pressure off steppin' out steppin' out steppin' out and jumpin' up and ststeppin' o and jumpin' up steppin' out steppin' out and jumpin' up andnd pressure off pressure off pressure pressure pressure off i'm lost don't wanna be found i'm up and not

outside looking in on myself just me i couldn't be anyone else is it bad when you're feeling this good are we all misunderstood it's fine going out of my mind going out of my mind going out of my mind everybody everywhere feel it in the air oh yeah it's time to take the pressure off everybody everywhere step out into the future it's time to take the pressure off oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh it's up to you now it's time to take the pressure off oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh it's up to you now step out into the future oh oh oh oh jump up into the future