[helicopter whirring]

[dramatic music] [footsteps]

[footsteps]

[dramatic music] [music continues] [thud] [fire crackling] [crackling continues]

[drum roll] [engine sputtering] [whirring] [intense music]

[instrusure!l music] we have been careless! and u.n.c.l.e. arrives before us, equipped to act. i want this parcel or whatever it is that was taken from the doctor. see that the helicopter is intercepted. yes, excellency. tomo. yes, excellency. [[machine gun firing] [firing continues] [machine gun firing] [firing continues]

[firing continues] [blast] [crash] - are you alright? - yes. but please hurry back to london.

not only must i contend with a preposterous science fiction puzzle an island of dead people, but i have to fly over here to find out why two of my agents were suddenly attacked on what was supposed to be an ultra secret mission. person, friendly or otherwise

ation? no one. what do you make of it? plague? or some man-made catattrophe? well, i would rather let our laboratory answer that. - - e village? - totally destroyed. - - ow's that wound?' - it's insignificant. the two items, the investigation of the vehicle and the two men who attacked napoleon and myself has revealed nothing. apparently, they went to great pains to remove 'every shred of identification.' . they are ready to begin the closed-circuit examination. well, let's get on with it then. (man on screen) to the higigst authority. decontaminate this and take it directly to mr. waverly. hello!o!hat have we got ourselves here?

otariidae, having ears. 'in layman's terminology' a common eared seal. but an autopsy in detail is indicated. has he finished with that infernal poking about? i, uh, think so, sir. yes, sir. gentlemen, we have here a most unusual seal. this little fella's last meal was a feast of bluegilled sardines a very uncommon variety y und only on the coast of norway. an uncommonlnllong journey for a little fellow on a full stomach.

that although he is unmistakenly a young seal.. ...he unquestionably died...of old age. old age? that's interesting. the people on the island, they were all very old. (man on screen) 'gentlemen, we all know that all living beings' 'are born with certain antibodies' to combat the aging process. we also know that these antibodies are only capable of retarding or slowing down that aging process. 'that is why some men live to be over a hundred' 'while others die, say, at two, ten or twenty.' but this little seal was infected with some culture that completely destroyed his ability

i will verify these findings in more detail after i have been able to discover what that culture is. the letter attached to the carton.. ...it should be decontaminated by now. unknown cultures, young seals dying of old age 'all this scientific mumbo jumbo' 'instead of a simple logical explanation.' maybe there is one, sir. hese islands which could be anywhere from two hundred miles to a thousand miles from the coast of norway. depending on where he stuffed himself with the bluegilled sardines now, what if something poisoned him and heheas carried dead back down along the coast of norway by the gulf current right to these islands. i take it then, you think this plague or infection or whatever it is, started in norway? well, it had to start somewhere, sir.

letter. - what does he say in it? it's from that dr. mcdonald on the island. it seems a herd of those seals washed up on his beach a week ago, dead. a few days later, the people started dying. the doctor seems convinced that the seals carried some unidentified infection which transmitted itself to the island's entire population. that's a remarkable similarity orway to our own laboratory's theory, isn't it? find the source of this infection and secure it. or destroy i i and me? act as liaison for mr. solo. i must return to pressing matters ininew york. recuperate! that's an order.

(male #1) 'look out there! look out!' [thud] wouldn't wanna ruin a nice jacket like that with a flying suitcase, would we? gee, you saved my life! now let's just say, i saved you a bump on the head, okay? you could've cost me my job! now, you watch where you're going! i think that's pretty good advice for all of us to follow, isn't it, friend? sir? yes, as a matttt of fact, you can. i have a reservation for bergen, norway. - oh, i hear it's lovely. - i couldn't agree more. [chuckles] solo. napoleon solo. that's kind of a funny name. but i guess i could get used to it.

what do you mean, get used it? i mean, if w wwere gonna be friends. - you're going to norway also? - mm-hmm. i'm going to norway to visit my grandparents. uh, my mom is back in new york alone. she's a widow. very pretty widow. - well, that's nice. - 'she's also a very good cook.' oh, uhuhyou aren't married, are you? uh, no, christopher. i am not married. - you can call me chris. - okay, chris. - here you are, mr. solo. - thank you. if you'd excuse me, i've got a little business to attend to, before i take off. see you on the plane. i'm sure you will. excuse me, miss. i'm afraid there's been a terrible mistake. 'you see, my grandma purchased thisisicket for me, and, uh' she's awful hard of hearing and not too used to buying tickets. i'm going to see my mother and mother's in bergen, norway. but this ticket's for new york.

[sighs] [siren wailing] [static] ear. napoleon, i have some rather bad news for you to ststt your trip. one of our agents in norway, olaf nelson, has been killed. - do we know who did it? - 'no.' 'but we have reason to believe it concerns your mission.' 'before he died, he managed to smuggle something to us.' it's, uh...like a ring for the finger except it's too large, of course. and it has a rather bizarre design on the top. what kind of design? 'i can't make head nor tail of it.'

not the artistic type. let's see what you make of this. "marry the maiden." 'i beg your pardon, i'm sorrrr' inside the ring, there was a piece of paper. 'it simply says, "marry the maiden."' it doesn't register with me. 'since it came from our agent in stromberg' 'it could well pinpoint your present assignment.' 'try the village of stromberg.' i'm sending henderson to the airport with the riri. if your plane gets away before his arrival [dramatic music] [d[dmatic music]

hi, mr. solo! anyone ever tell you what could happen if you sneak up behind someone? usually, it scares the liver out of them. but you didn't flinch. well, i owe it all to clean living. yeah! my mother's always telling me about staying clean. i had a hunch we'd get around to y yr mother, sooner or later. yeah, she's a awful good-looking widow. chris, listen. come here. - i want you to do me a favor. - well, sure. okay. now, i wouldn't tell this to just anyone, you see, but, uh i am an international spy. - you are? - shh, shh, shh now. and i'm being chased by a band of diamond thieves. (chris) 'wow!' (solo) 'i want you to help me get outta here alive.' - yes, sir. - okay. you see the doors to the baggage area over there?

black patch over his left eye, may try to sneak in here. i want you to position yourself at that door and keep a sharp eye open. - no, sir. - okay. carry on. get the ring. [dramatic music] [music continues] out ththe. [henderson grunts]

d] uh! [dramatic music] uh. be a good lad.. ...and give this to your friend, mr. solo. - oh, but you're-- - now don't.. mustn't create a fuss now. let it be our little secret. go, boy. go.

'passengers to bergen, norway, on flight 316, gate 4.' 'final call.' [fast-paced music] [dramatic music]

hi. hi. i thought we were supposed to be travelling companions. mm-hmm. or would you like to, uh, show me the picture of your mother? i don't guess so. oh, i see. okay. uh, if you change yourind, i'll be right up front there. mr. solo.. i, uh, i kinda told you a little story back at the airport. what kind of little story? well, it wasn't exactly the truth. - ohoh - yeah.. but you did the same thing to me. i did? well, you said the man was short and fat and wore a patch. well, he didn't look like that at all. what man? the man who gave me this. to give to you. and he had a beard.

anyone see him give this to you? i don't think so. [laughs] he's good old, what's his name? i tell you, looks like he fooled you too. he's always pretending he's stabbed. it's a kind of a little joke with him. but i saw...blood. uh-uh. that's ketchup. he carries this little tube around with him and he uses it when he wants to play a little joke on somebody. ah! when we get to norway, let's not mention it to your mother. she's not in norway. she's in new york. ramatic music] she is what? uh, that's kind of part of the little story i was tellin' ya. i kind of fibbed a little. i turned it around. i was going home from visitin' my grandparents in scotland. [dramatic music] [sighs] you said you like jokes. here's a real neat one. [whirring]

what'll i tell my mother? i'm sure you'll think of something. now move. i'm getting you a a e-way ticket back to new york right now. uh...on second thought, maybe you better buyuyour own ticket. - 'i'm in a hurry.' - 'but, mr. solo.' i'm sorry, chris. i'm in a hurry. go ahead. - chris, i've e anged my mind. - i was hoping you'd come back. some of my friends are trying to play another joke on me. let's just fool them this time, shall we? - you stay with me, alright? - okay. [speaking in foreign language] yes, i think i was first in line here a aually. [speaking in foreign language] yes, i understand. we'll work it out.

guage] there. [speaking in foreign language] [dramatic music] [slow-papad music] it was sure fun out at the airport playing spies. yeah, it's been a lot of laughs. i hope you changed your mindnd about sending me home. well, as a matter of fact while you finish your fifth dessert, i'm going to make a phone call