>> all new on dr. fill. >> this cougar defense is a joke. >> they still live under the same roof. >> you guys are divorced but you're living with ross. >> if that's not enough. >> why don't we tell the truth for just a minute. >> oh, let's do. >> what leaves dr. phil speechless. >> it is pretty hard to shock me, but you just did. if we're going to do something here that matters, then we've got to deal with the truth. >> if i could help you get this family back on track, are you willing to do that? this is going to be a changing day in your life. how are you? [cheering] how you doing? how you doing?

okay, now, a miserable marriage, millions of dollars stolen out of the mouths of school children to shower luxuries on a much younger wife. the new york post reported she was a cougar with a vor rayous sexual appetite and the boy toys in cheesy lounges and white stretch limos. sounds like an episode of desperate housewife, right? it is not, this is how one couple, laura and ross' relationshipped played out in the media after he was caught embezzling money and asked for leniency because he claimed his cougar wife is an unfit mother and he can't go to joel. >> i was arrested and accused of

embezzling $3.16. i was convicted of stealing $1.7 million. >> it is being called the cougar defense. one ex-husband is claiming in court, his ex-wife is incompetent because she is a cougar, dating much younger men. >> laura was hired by cougar life diary, she used to write blogs about how to pick up young boys. >> i was as curious as everybody else, so i wrote about that. >> she was hanging out with a lot of other guys. my son's friends were starting to take bets on who was going to be able to sleep with laura first. >> i wasn't sleeping with everybody. she is a whore, she is doing this. okay, ross. >> ross says you're using this cougar defense, which is a joke. >> he is showing his wife's steamy calendar off in court, hoping to paint her as an unfit mom. >> my lawyer submitted a seven-page document. one paragraph said i was looking

for annal an alternative to jail because of the relationship my daughter and my wife. >> it is all about ross trying to save his own ass. >> believe it or not, that was just the tip of the iceberg. ross says his decades-long marriage was actually great until his wife turned into a cheating, sex-obsessed party girl. >> my ex-wife, laura, and i are divorced and we are still living under the same roof. >> ross and i have been divorced about five months. we were definitely living the millionaire lifestyle, but i didn't have access to the money he made. i felt like i was one of his children. >> from 2008 to 2010, laura and i had a major break down. she was seeing this guy. >> i had one emotional affair with somebody online. rossi ventually threatened him and he was gone. we were going to mediation, i want a divorce.

>> she chose to take on this party girl lifestyle. she was going out to clubs with men half her age. in the beginning, i thought laura was just having a mid-life crisis, but this was a whole other lifestyle that i couldn't handle. i've been asking her to leave for four and a half years and she just refuses to leave. >> i will not move out of the house. i ran the household, i was the mom. and the house is in both of our name, don't tell me that that's not my house. >> well, another eye-popping detail, laura and ross are living under the same roof. seriously. they are divorced, but they're still under the same roof. >> being in the house with my ex-husband is -- >> she lives in a room at that side of the house, i live in the master suite on this side of the house. >> we can totally avoid each other. >> typically, i would use the front staircase and laura uses the back staircase. this has was a war zone. we went from a peaceful family

life to three years of very intense arguing, break thing, wrestling around, it was a living nightmare. >> i used to come to my mother's house and say no doubt he is going to kill me. i never argued with him by the banister because i was always afraid he was going to toss me over. >> he opened the computer and threw, it smashed it on the floor below. she runs down and picks up my computer and smashing it. >> i remember taking a stapler and slamming the glass. >> i hit her with it, i took her, wrapped my arm around her waist again, picked her up and threw her on the couch. once i got her on the couch, sat on her. >> i called 911 while he was actually inside the couch and he was stopping me from getting out of the couch. >> i ended up with bruises all the way from my face down to my shoulder. she refused to unlock the door, so i literally smashed the door

open, ripped it off the hinges, and threw it out in the hallway. scared up the wall with dark, dents, it was completely shattered. >> i was absolutely living a real life "war of the roses". i was waiting for the sandler to come crashing down. >> laura is here but ross is joining us by satellite from new york because he can't leave the state. he's been convicted of embezzling $1.7 million is awaiting sentencing. you are divorced, right? >> yes. >> completed, signed off, everything done. >> yes. >> but you're living with ross, same house. >> same household. >> you use one door and one stairway and ross uses another door and another stairway? >> for the most part, yes. it is a big house, we rarely, rarely see each other. if we're in the gym, occasionally. by out, i leave a lot. at the very beginning of this divorce, i left the house a lot

because he was very explosive, so i didn't know what else to do, so i would leave. guild out with my friends, i would spend time at my moms. i stayed away from the house. now i'm really in that matter of this period of time has made me become stronger so now i stay. >> what about your divorce? >> ross and i did not agree on raising children. that was a big issue in the house. ross is also very controlling. >> so why did you get a divorce? because he's controlling? >> i got a divorce because the marriage no longer worked, at all in any area. sexually, financially, his controlling factors, raising the children. all of our thoughts were different. >> so, ross why did you get a divorce? >> from my perspective i got a divorce because that's what laura wanted. i was willing to hang in there, fight for the relationship. she is right, we did not agree

most of the time when it came to raising the children it really just came to the point where she wanted something different. she, you know, after a christmas argument in 2007, she just changed, and then, she started taking on this different lifestyle it started out with a boyfriend. the boyfriend really was just the tip of the iceberg. she would hang out in bars and night clubs and, you know, the friends that she had ranged from probably 21 to 26. it was literally watching laura relive her 20s. >> is that true? >> no. >> after this big fight, did you change some way? >> after this big fight, i became the person i was when he met me, which was very out going, i liked to dance, i love people in general, and i do click with younger people, however, i would like to clarify that from 24 to my best friend

is 44, i have a variety of friends. >> did you become what's called a cougar? >> no. >> what you do define cougar as? >> cougar is a woman who is dating and specifically searching out younger men to date. i don't do that. i do write cougar blogs because i have a lot of friends who are younger, i don't date these guys. i don't date them and i didn't. >> you don't have a young boyfriend? >> no, i have friends. >> are these friends with benefits? seriously. >> no. >> you have to tell the truth. >> absolutely. i had one friend that this past year i was -- and he's not a 20 -- he's 33. >> we'll be right back. [applause] >> tell me about the calendar. >> i can't be upset by my

pictures. >> you're certainly flexible. and later: i've been doing this a long time and it is pretty hard to shock me, but you just did. >> tomorrow, on an all-new dr. phil. the disappearance of baby kate. >> do you believe he knows where that baby is? >> i do. >> do you believe he killed that baby. did you take that car seat out and not know it had a baby in it? >> no. >> what did shely about in court. >> the exclusive interview. >> were you involved in a plan to do away with your

>> laura loves to are naked. she would come into the bedroom naked every day go into the master bathroom naked, sit on the floor, spread her leg, paint her toenails and get dressed. >> ross tells people i walk around naked to torture him. >> i believe she was trying to get me to rape her and she would have put me in jail and put me out of the house. >> he says you're trying to bait him into raping her. >> that's entertaining. >> she was. >> that is a lie. that is such a lie. >> this is the big house where you never see each other? >> no, wait, this is in the mast are bedroom. >> this woman did not move out of our master bedroom until two

weeks before she filed the divorce, so she lived in the master bedroom from the time of her first -- >> that's a lie. >> -- affair in february of '08 until october of 2010. >> i moved out of the master bed flume 2009. >> go out, dress up for clubs and come home tonight and jump into bed with me and lay on top of the covers and say, don't touch me. it was a game she played. >> no, no, no. that's a lie. >> how big this house in. >> very big, 7,000 square feet, i don't even know. something like that. >> you've remained in the house. what's this house worth? >> crap, because he let it go in foreclosure. >> it looks like a beautiful home. >> you should come walk through this. no, it is not. he let give into foreclosure. we owe over $900,000 on this house. it might be marble for 1.1. i don't know, the market is so pad right now. >> it is a million dollar house

and you say you're not going to leave. >> i didn't say that. >> you actually did. >> did i say it in part. >> you did. >> in the beginning of it, ross wanted me out so bad because he would tell me, you know, you need to leave -- cold that in front of people, and then, behind closed doors, you know what, laura, let's try to work this out, be civil, we can still live in the house, it won't ruin us financially, we won't have to break up the money because i need the money for whatever, the bridge hampton project, i said, okay. i thought we were going to be friends and i moved out of the room in 2009 when i took my -- >> that's not true. >> that is true. he still let me use the closet and bathroom. >> she moved out of the bedroom in august of 2010, but refused to take her clothes out of the close says, that way she could still come in and walk around naked and get dressed every day. that is where the big fight came from when i tore the door off of

her hinges. >> you tore the door off of her hinges because she was walking around naked? >> the reason i did it was because she was locking me out of her room, but yet she was leaving her clothes in my room so she could come and go in my room, get naked, do whatever she wants and it was a teasing thing she used to do with me. she was really trying to get me aggravated. >> tell me about the calendar, the housewives next door. and this is you. >> yes. yes. i did that when i was 38. if you ever read the paperwork on this -- >> i don't see any paperwork. [laughter] >> no, no, on the website. when the website was up and running. i'm sorry, on the website. when website was up and running it was about women that felt good about themselves even after marriage, after raising children. >> you clearly feel good about yourself. [laughter] >> i want you to understand. >> this is you, too.

>> ross funded this. he knew all about this. it was not like a bad thing. >> halloween. christmas. >> i mean, they're cute pictures. i can't be upset about my pictures. >> ross, you funded this for $65,000. how many copies of this sold? >> maybe five. >> no. that's not true. >> we originally ordered 2500 copies, and i have thrown out probably 98% of them. >> that's ally. >> there are still a few boxes left in the garage. >> that's a lie? >> yes. >> what is the truth? >> he threw out a couple of boxes. i asked him not to, we have still maybe seven boxes in the garage. we had gone to a few bar, we had sold some, i was trying to promote it online but the website didn't work out it basically was a bust. i'm not going to say it wasn't, it totally was.

i didn't promote it right. he and i were fighting, they would say here is some money towards it, oh, you're not going to have sex with me tonight, you tonight get the money. >> you are certainly flexible, i will say. that we have to take a break. ross had an indecent proposal for laura did she take it? we will find out, when we come back. >> i said, how about we draw up a section contract. >> if i was to have sex with him, he would continue to pay my bills and give me money weeks of this campaign... and more ads. you, in ur living room or... what i'd say. losing nearly eight hundred... mired in iraq. nation we are... moving forward again. get folks back to work and... again. that with even bigger... fewer regulations... prosper. on the same trickle-down... in the first place. so what's my plan? manufacturing jobs... exports... that... ship jobs overseas. in half and produce more... clean coal, natural gas... solar, and biofuels. efficiency of cars and trucks. maintain the best workforce... hundred thousand additional... training two million... they need at our community... tuition in half and... americans can afford it. reduce our deficit by... next decade, on top of the... already cut. little more. afghanistan... pay down our debt and... nation-building... right here at home. patriotism, rooted in the... begins with a strong... thriving middle class. read my plan. and decide for yourself. thanks for listening.

>> i said, how about we draw up a sex contract. >> if i was to haveex with him, he would continue to pay my bills and give me money to survive. >> it only happened twice. both times felt horribly like raich. >> can't sleep with somebody i'm not attracted to. >> you were still married when this was going on, right? >> yes. >> so you're married and you draw up a sex contract. >> i didn't draw it up, he did. >> did you agree to it? >> we talked to it. >> it's not an essay question. >> i didn't agree to it, we talked about it so much. >> did you have sex twice? >> we had sex one time. >> did you get paid for it? >> no. >> so he stiffed you the money. >> it was about me helping her

with her business. after over a year of her clubbing, going out to bars, hanging out with all these guys, we had already put $65,000 into her calendar, and now, the calendar turned out to be such a bust she didn't get anywhere with it. now she is coming back to me, wanting to redo her website and different things and she is asking me to help her. and i turned to her, and i say, laura, you've been cheating on me, going out to clubs, you don't want me in your life and now you're turning to me for help. all i really want to do is reconnect with you and that's where the sex thing came up. it came up through one of my therapist's suggestions. one 69 therapist suggestions at one point in time is to grow close when you are having such issues is sometimes you have to fake it until you make it, so when this particular consideration came up, that's really where it came from.

>> give us the short version of how this sex contract worked. you drew up a contract that said, what? >> i was supposedded to be helping her with her website, and i said, well, if i'm going to do this for you, then what are you going to do for me? you know, you've treated my like crap for over a year and a half and now you're asking me to help you, this makes no sense. >> get to the clause where she does something for you. how was this articulated? >> once a week, on one given day, we would have sex. that's it. there was really nothing else to it. it was just i help her with her website, she would have sex if i did that, and we tried it twice, it was a terrible thing. >> did you agree to it? >> no, we tried it once. i guess i did agree that one time. >> during this phase were you having dates with other people? >> no. no. >> you were going to bars -- >> i was going out. ere is a difference between going out and actually going out on a date where somebody is going to take me out for dinner

and, i don't know, whatever. i was going out with my friends. i had a group of friends that we would go out go to some of the different clubs go out to dinner. i would go next door to my neighbor's house, have dinner at her house. i mean, i was -- >> so you're celibate at this point. >> you know -- that's my answer. >> i'm trying to find out where the bottom is here. >> i'm certainly not. >> you say that ross has cheated on new. >> absolutely starting in 2003. >> you say he cheated with his exduring the marriage and has been caught being inappropriate with co-workers. >> yes. >> so you say he's the one running red lights in this relationship, not. >> you i would ask her to prove any of that. >> let me just ask you, ross. is this true? >> the one time it did happen when we took a group of people to california for kala's 13th birthday and laura said she

couldn't come with us because she had to stay home and have sex with two guys, called it her sex weekend. >> is that true? >> that is absolutely a lie. >> somebody tell me the truth. [applause] >> that's the problem, dr. phil, you will never get the truth out of her. >> hold on. these are not things that reasonable folks can differ, it happened or not. one is blatantly lying, he went to california and you couldn't go because you would stay behind and have sex. >> he did go to california. i stayed behind because this is one of his tactics of controlling me. i'm taking kala to california for her birthday -- let me talk once. this is my life. i cannot ever speak, nothing. >> you feel my frustration because i can't get an answer. [applause] it doesn't really matter at this point, i'm just trying to get a feel for what's going on did stay behind because you had a

date for sexual purpose. >> i stayed behind to not go away with him, end of story. i was finally in my house and i thought, i don't want to go out. i want to stay home. it was him. i wanted to leave because i couldn't stand being in the house with him. when i was home, i like being home. >> friends over? >> no. >> we're going to take a break. we will talk about the fact that this has deteriorated into some substantial physical fights here. people always ask me, dr. phil, if people get divorced can they stay under the same roof? the reason this has come up is because in our economy, sometimes it makes financial sense to stay under one roof, share a home as roommates, even though at one time they were husband and wife. does it make sense and does work? well, we have a laboratory example right here. we will talk about that when we come back. why nature made?

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for them. we shouldn't measure compassion by how many people are on welfare. we should measure compassion by how many people are able to get off welfare and get a good paying job. my plan will create twelve million new jobs over the next four years helping lift families out of poverty and strengthening the middle-class. i'm mitt romney and i approve this message because we can't afford another four years like the last four years. ♪ like the last four years. >> when ross and i are together, it is generally in the gym. >> no eye contact, awkward. >> i basically avoid him at all costs. this is the cabana, i don't ever come back here any more because ross stayed in this cabana a lot

and it has a bad aura for me. >> it must be tough living under one roof after a divorce. it is hard on both of you. ross says he has been trying to get laura to move out the last four and a half years. do you have any intention of moving out? >> i think the bank is going to kick us out, to be honest, so i have to move out eventually. >> otherwise, you have no intention of moving out. >> no. >> and why? why wouldn't somebody move out if they want an alternative lifestyle. >> i didn't want an alternative. i didn't want to be married to you. my children didn't live in the house, kala did. >> we're not talking about whether or not to be married or not but the choice to stay in the house and destroy a family. >> ross' answer was, you leave, you leave, you take nothing, you're not allowed to have my money. i was in this marriage for a good 15 years. i was, like, well, i should be allowed to take my furniture, he

wouldn't allow me to take any, so fine, i'm staying. >> she is lying, i was going to give her anything she wanted out of the house. she makes things up. >> we're talking 2008 when i asked you for the divorce. >> okay, look -- >> the original document between you and i. >> hold on. >> is where i was offering you $600,000. >> i feel like i'm heard to both of you. -- i'm married to both of you. [laughter] >> sorry, dr. phil. >> let me ask you some questions, and these aren't essay questions. you've had physical fights with ross. >> yes. >> and in those fights did you stab him with a pen? >> yes, i did. >> and where did you stab him? >> i think it was like on his side, because i remember just trying to break free and grabbed whatever i could grab. >> do you think he has drugged new. >> yes. >> in what way? >> i passed out at the wheel of

a car and i got my senses together, i don't even know how, went into my friend's house, she was working in a tanning salon, laid down, fell asleep for a couple hours, got up, i don't feel right. i went home, just went to bed and that night was whatever, and he -- that night i honestly, he was on top of me. >> what is whatever? >> what happened was, i was laying there and sleeping but in this fog, which i don't do these things. >> you think he drugged you and had sex with you. >> i think he tried, but no, i woke up. >> you think he drugged you like rufies, date-rape type drugs. >> they said whatever the chemical that is in xanax or something, i don't know so whatever they pulled in -- >> you got your blood tested. >> i went to the hospital. i didn't know what was wrong with me. >> did you drug her? >> of course not. now why don't we tell the truth for just a minute. >> oh, let's do.

[laughter] >> ross doesn't tell the truth. >> go ahead. >> laura just doesn't know how to do it. the incident she is talking about did occur in the sense that she went to the hospital for a drug overdose, that part is true. and, it is true that she tried to blame it on me. she was telling her parents and everybody that i did it. but, the interesting thing is, dr. phil is two months later, she actually got drugged again, taken to the hospital out in the hamptons, and her little young friends had to call me to come and get her because i was sitting at home with her parents and her brother so it is kind of funny that two times two months apart, she was drugged, overdosed and pumped her stomach. and, yet, i was with her parents the second time and wasn't home the first time so i'm kind of curious how i was able to do that from 60 miles away. >> i never blamed him for the

second one. the second time i was out at a club and somebody poured something in my drink, supposedly. that is what they said. >> there is a common denominator but she refuses to tell the truth. >> two times, just so we're clear, the fact is that happened within two weeks of each other. >> here is my concern. while you two are going through all of this, and you've smashed doors down, stabbed him with a pen, he's wrestled you on to the couch. you said, sitting on top of you. >> right. >> yes. >> so all of this is going on and you all have a daughter. you have a daughter in the middle of all this. >> yes. >> i don't get it. i mean, you have a very different image that what you describe your lifestyle as being. you sit there calling her a liar with self righteous judgment which is a bit of a stretch for me in you are convicted of a felony and facing prison time.

this whole thing is a contradiction of terms. you all have a daughter in this are concerned about her? >> 100%, all the time. that's why we're here, honestly. >> we're here because of laura, not because of kala. >> no, we're here because -- >> laura wanted her attention on tv this woman is an attention junky, as in, a narsasistic attn junky. >> they came to me and said are you interested in doing the show, and they said, well, there is a child involved, she is caught in the middle because they know that's what gets my attention. next, ross and laura's daughter kala, that's caught in the middle of this, is here. she has not been listening to this. i've had her sequestered in the back. i wanted to find out what she

was listening to and living with, and i think we have done that with great clarity. i'll talk to her when we come back. >> kala no longer speaks to me, she literally has pushed her out of my life. >> when this whole divorce started, aid good relationship with my dad. but,s astarted hearing the fighting, i realized my dad was lying. >> you suck as a dad. >> tomorrow, on an all new dr. phil. >> took our daughter. >> do you believe he killed that baby? >> the disappearance of baby kate. >> were you involved in a plan do away with your child? losing weight clicked for me

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>> ross said he loves his is7-year-old daughter kala but has no relationship with her because he says his ex-wife, laura, has gone out of her way to destroy it by poisoning her mind against him. >> me and my dad have a horrible relationship. >> kala no longer speaks to me. she literally has pushed me out of her life. >> when this whole divorce started, i had a really good relationship with my dad, but, as i started hearing the fighting, i realized that my dad is lying to me and i watched him physically hurt my mom. >> ross doesn't recognize the damage he's done, he just keeps blaming it on me, which makes her even more angry. even calling me a whore, a cougar, i don't care, but you suck as a dad. >> once he was arrested, i

didn't feel like fixing our relationship because what can you fix if your father is in jail. >> my children are my only support mechanism, to have one of them treat me like this is very unsettling with the potential situation that's coming up in my life. >> kala, you're here and your dad made a big point out of not wanting to have you with your mother. i'm not really interested in what his thoughts are about that. i just wanted to sit down and talk to you for a minute, okay? >> okay. >> and this is your therapist, right? >> yeah. >> good to meet you. thank you for coming with her. >> absolutely. >> and being here. one thing your parents agree about is that you are just terrific. and that you're talented, intelligent and productive and doing a great job in life. so, what do you think about all of this and how can i help you? >> i just think the whole

situation is crazy, it just got out of hand. and i never expected to see that my dad was going to be in jail. i didn't know that. who knows that? it is a divorce, okay, i knew about that, but didn't think it would go this far it went as far as ruining my whole family, me and my dad don't have a relationship, and, i mean -- >> why do you not have a relationship with your father? >> he would blame things on my mom. but, some of the things my mom did when it came to going out, he does that, too he does the same things. no, i didn't get along with my mom at first, but you know what, the fact that he's kind of contradicting himself, he's doing the same thing, so it's like -- and i didn't like that. and it bothered me. and he would try and get me against my mom and then he tells me so many things, he will say it is your mom's fault. yes, she did start this, like,

of course, she started the divorce. that broke my family, too, but then he is saying that it's all of her fault and then he's saying that she's saying bad things about him and she is blaming it on him. >> always tell parents, don't put your kids in the middle. you go with your mother you feel like you're betraying your dad or you can pick sides. i promise you, you don't have enough information to pick sides. you have just enough information to be confused and hurt and knocked off balance. because near one of these people are objective. they tell you the world as they see it. they tell you what's going on as they experience it. you know, your dad thinks your mom has really made some bad choices, she thinks he has made bad choices and decisions, and that's the one thing i agree with them about. they've both made really bad choices and decisions and the worst is involving you in the middle of all of this. you have to understand, none of this is your fault.

none of this is your fault. why is that hard to hear? >> i don't know. i would hear them fight all the time and hear my mom, like, the kids and obviously i'm one of the kids and then i would hear my dad bring up me and i heard them fighting about me or my two siblings and it just -- >> i'll tell you, i hope everybody at home is listening to this conversation. if you're doing something else right now, stop doing it and pay attention to this. i tell parents all the time that children have a unique ability to figure out how things are their fault. you need to understand, that's not the case here. whatever situation they're in, they are the architects of that, they put it together that way. you come together where you mesh, you can come together where you mash your gears and that's how they've come

together. they both love you very much but they're not behaving like they love you very much, because if they were, they would both change what they're doing. and, things are going to change very soon. you understand that your father is very likely to be gone for a while, right? >> yes. >> you don't want that, i'm sure. >> i don't, obviously, he's my dad, but at the same time, it's like, i don't get why that happened. i just don't get it. >> do you have a boyfriend? >> yes, i do. >> you do all fight? >> yeah, we do. >> you do yell and scream? >> yeah. we've definitely screamed at each other. >> you're mimicking the same things. you need to stop that right now. the more you practice it, the harder it is to stop. you need to stop that right now. you're better than that. you deserve better than that you should demand better than that from yourself and anybody in your life. don't let them set your course. we have to take a break. we'll be right back.

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>> we have a lot of fun here in the studio audience, right? [cheering] if you're going to be in the los angeles area and would like free tickets go to drphil.com or call 323-461-7445. >> ross leftny approximately $500,000 worth of debt. i still currently teach dance and make $100 a week. i have no money. i can't run the household because i can't pay the electric. i turned to food stamps. they won't give me food stamps because he is still in the house. i tried selling the last piece of jewelry i had. he is going to federal prison, vel bed, food, health insurance. my daughter and i, however, we're going to be, like, winging it. thanks. >> ross, are you there? >> i'm still here.

>> what do you think about what your daughter had to say and the conversation she and i have just had? >> that's really the heart of the issue with me wanting laura to move out four and a half years ago. because laura chose to live this alternative lifestyle while still maintaining residence in the family home, it has literally destroyed sibling relationships, relationships between me and kala. this is laura's controlling way of just, i don't know, get back at me for something, i'm not sure since she is the one that started it. >> i've been doing this a long time and it is pretty hard to shock me, but you just did. you just shocked me. i sat down and asked you what you thought about my conversation with your daughter and her being caught in the middle of this turmoil of which you are an active agent, and you heard her say that she sometimes

blames herself for this, that it is affecting her life, it is affecting her life and what's going on, and you said, well, four and a half years ago when she wouldn't move out at those lifestyle and blah, blah, blah, you went right back into combat mode and blaming your wife and shame on you for doing it. [applause] what do you have to say about your daughter? >> what i have to say about kala is that it makes me sad that she has witnessed so much fighting and destruction. i did not mean to jump into combat mode, but the point i was trying to make was that -- >> please don't make it again. >> it would have been easier. i won't. >> this is now. you can't change -- >> i understand. >> you can't change the chaos

that you've ban party to the last four and a half years. we're here now. >> i agree. >> you owe your children, beginning with kala, you owe her a most sincere apology. you owe her -- >> i agree. >> please, just hear me out and then you can decide what you want to do with it. you need to apologize to her for what you have put her through for dam damn near half of her l. she needs to hear that from you, and then she needs a question from you that says, kala, tell me what i can do for you. so, just think about what i've said. you owe your children a sincere apology. not a, i'm sorry for what i did, but your mother -- you need to take that out of your vocabulary, they don't want to hear it. the only person you control is

you and you need to sincerely hear what i'm saying. and i hope you will really think about what i've said. i don't even want you to respond right now, i just want you to think about it. but, i think you will agree, i'm giving you good advice is that a yes or a no? >> you are, i agree with. >> you all right. now, what do you think about the conversation i had with your daughter? tell me what you're thinking right now. >> that she is such a great kid. she's -- i am a good mom and i do love her more than anything. i just didn't know how to get out of this marriage and it turned out like to and it keeps unfolding worse and worse and worse. and i know it's affecting her, i just don't know how to get it under control. >> let me assure you that the

most powerful role model in any kind's life is the same-section parent, and i can tell you that what you're doing in this relationship with ross is nothing short of abuse of these children. and you need to stop that and you need to stop it right now. there is not one argument you have had that is worth the price that your children have to pay for you to have it. and, i'll guarantee you, i would rather be safe and secure emotionally with my children in a box under a bridge that i would dragging them through an emotional hell in a roof, under a roof with somebody else. i promise you. [applause] she deserves better. that's all i'm saying. we'll be right back.

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866-437-7445. >> i could be any plainer? sometimes i think i'm talking to myself, i really do. there is no reality except perception and if somebody perceives something to be a certain way that is as real to them as me standing here next to you and that is where you get in trouble. understand, if you're watching today and you've been in a situation or are in a situation where someone is dominating you, isolating you, threatening you, terrorizing you, physically assaulting you, mentally or emotionally abusing you, demeaning who you are, that is abuse and i have all kinds of resources on drphil.com to have you kind give through a checklist and decide if what you're living with is, in fact, abuse, fan it is, what you need to do about it to get yourself

to safety, for you and for your children. thank you for being here. so long. [applause] one more game, that's all our nationals need to clinch the nl east pennant and roll into the playoffs. will it happen tonight? we'll find out. >> it's the one year anniversary of the occupy movement and demonstrators took to the streets today. i'll tell you who they're targeting coming up. >> the voice of convicted killer lee malvo, i'm andrea mccarren. i'll have audio excerpts of his

chilling interview coming up next. >> this is 9 news now. tonight is the night the nationals could clinch their first ever pennant. >> history could be made later tonight. >> reporter: ladies, you know there are some things out of reach for this nationals team right now. for example, they will not win 100 games this season. they've got 96 wins, three games to go. you do the math. however, everything else is on the table including the possibility of a world series run that nobody expected when the season first got started, but for right now for tonight the focus is on one more game. that's all they need to clinch a national league east pennant and roll into the playoffs, avoid the possibility of a wildcard game. for right now the fans are starting to roll in even though the game is a couple hours away and i am told the champagne is on chill. however, if we're honest about it, it's