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we mean by that and how prevalent it is. >> about one in three teenagers experience some form of teen dating abuse. we use the words violence and abuse interchangeably. really it refers to a broad spectrum of things i.'s not just physical. that's one of the first things we try to educate about. it's not just physical, it can be emotional psychological, sexual, financial, and it can really be primarily through the use of social media sort of a manipulative, controlling type of behavior. the physical is usually what you'll see later. all the other things are the trigger sign, the warning signs we should be looking for. >> it's interesting, and i want to talk later in the half hour about how social media can help

and hurt and raise awareness. >> julian, you have done a truly tremendous job, you were in eighth grade when you came up with this psa. >> back in 2012 when i was at eighth grade, i was at roberto clem mean tea focused on producing media. some classmates of ours we were introduced of this project by our teacher, mr. dempsey. this choose respect conference was introduced to us. so we made this psa, my friend daniel and i took up the roles as the actors and my other two friends came up with the idea. it was a cause that we were very interested in and hoping to raise a little more awafrns about. so we made the psa and amazingly in 2012 we won first place as eighth graders competing against high schoolers and other middle

schoolers. very excited about that. >> we've got a big conference coming up march 8th. everyone said this is free. tell people what they will find at this conference. >> on march 8, it's for montgomery county teens, their parents and youth service providers in montgomery county and really the idea is education and prevention and some fun stuff that we'll be doing during the day. our focus here is on social media. our theme is actually hash tag respect yourself 2015 with the idea that we're trying to promote and explain appropriate use and inappropriate use of social media and really lick tronnic devices as a whole. students will literally walk down the red carpet and have an opportunity to take selfies in front of sort of a line of different sponsors and other things behind them just like the

academy awards. there will be the pylons, a lot of fun. we'll be incorporate rating social media into the day. the students will have a chance to hash tag or promote and put out there the things we're learning through the day. we're not just touching the lives of the families and kids that come on march 8th burks also a broader reach which is what social media is about. >> cheryl, welcome backs, you've been here before. you are a survivor yourself. as we focus on young people, teenagers in particular, your daughter also has a story too. you've been working with her on this as we talk about social media and technology and the way things are changing now. share a little bit of her story. >> i will. she's now 21. it happened when she was 16 years old and a student at a montgomery county high school. the young man in question was two years older than her. it was so interesting jim, much like a cycle of violence that adults experience.

he drew her in seduced her through gifts and through being kind to her and listening to her and eventually what happened is he started tracking where she was through her cell phone, sending her very, very abusive text messages, blocking her friends, telling her to block her friends on facebook, on and on and on. >> trying to gain that control really. >> exactly, because it's all about power and control. it was only through the intervention of a mentor that she had at the university of maryland. my husband and myself, her parents that things were able to stop. it was a long, very heartbreaking time for her and for everyone involved. >> we've got a lot more to get to. we'll be right back after the break. as we go to break, if you'd like to learn more about the con flens coming up choose respect here is the website to go to. stay with us on "viewpoint."

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welcome back to "viewpoint." again, our focus is teenage dating domestic violence. this conference coming up march 8, choose respect. when we talk about teens and dating and violence, it can take various forms as we mentioned right off the top, debby. what signs should parents be watching for and students themselves for that matter? >> i can talk a little bit about the signs i saw in my daughter. perhaps debby can talk about signs in general. he was becoming very, very secretive. she was changing her appearance. she was always wearing long sleeves which could hiz bruises. she would not want to take phone calls from her friends or do things with her friends. it used to be when she was younger, she would go out with her female friends to a movie, for instance. now when they would call and ask her to go she would refuse.

she became anorexic, she stopped eating for a while. it was very very unlike the wonderful light person she had been. it turned very bad and very quickly. >> do you find that people isolate themselves young girls in this case? >> absolutely. and i think that's one of the hallmark signs of someone that has sword of a change in routine. it may be abrupt, and it also may change over time as a relationship, healthy or unthem hi builds and people withdraw from their usual groups of friends, they have changes in their routine. we've seen teens that pull out of extracurricular activities they might have been doing before because their partner doesn't want them doing and maybe not shopping at the mall with fraepd like they usually would because their partner doesn't want them at the mall with their friend. what are they wearing? what are they trying on? what clothes are they buying? really, again, it's about

wanting to know where someone is and be able to watch for -- is someone controlling your kid or are you, as a teenager, experience that where you aren't making choices for yourself anymore? >> julian, you're a junior. tell us what you and your friends are seeing or hearing about. do you know this is going on in schools? >> i think that's one of the big issues right now. i think domestic violence, advocating against it people don't know how to deal with it, whether it be a teacher, a parent or a friend. i think in high schools it really is a difficult subject to talk about. i think the issue lies in the culture. people don't know how to deal wit, and in social media, even though it is a great avenue to advocate against it, there is a lot of influence in pop culture that will tell you this is the way you're supposed to act t way you're supposed to treat other people i think now especially with social media and being able to see how other people act

especially in pop culture it may not give you the best advice on how to live your life and treat or people. >> that's a really good point. when we differentiate between young people and older people young people may not have the experience or don't have the years of experience to know that this is not acceptable, it's not right and it doesn't happen to everybody. they may feel like, hey, this is somewhat normal, i don't know any better than this. do you find the age difference there? >> absolutely. that's the significant of putting together education programs like the healthy teen dating conference on march 8th and like the healthy teen dating curriculum that we do in montgomery county public schools, is to teach teens what's okay and not okay. 's not necessarily intuitive. something that feels right may actually not be okay. one of the examples i point to, it may be cute at first that your boyfriend or girlfriend is texting you, tweeting you, 5 million times a day, wanting to

know where you are, sending you pictures, asking you to send them pictures. at some point that's not cute anymore. it's controlling. where are you? what are you doing? i want to i don't your location. that's not healthy. understanding that is hard when you're talking about a 14-year-old or 15-year-old teen in that situation. it's hard to differentiate. >> was there an issue of stalking and control with your daughter? >> yes there was. there's a vulnerability when you're that age, 14, 15, 16, as debby is saying, it feels really good. there's this cycle of violence and it feels good to be seduced into that cycle when it starts. there's flowers extra attention, no matter how that attention is given. the young person feels good about that intentionally and by the time they're sucked into that and get beyond the seduction stage and to the part

where they are being abused in whatever form that abuse takes they feels there's no way out. ki speak for my daughter and myself, you feel you don't want to talk to anyone about it because you're embarrassed and don't know who to go to. >> i want to talk about resources and people who you can turn particularly when you're young and in high school. we'll be right back on "viewpoint." if you'd like to learn more about the conference coming up, choose respect, there's the web address to go to.

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welcome back. choosing respect is our topic this sunday morning on "viewpoint." we're talking about teen violence dating violence in particular. we have the big conference coming up march 8. talk a little bit, debby feinstein, about who --

particularly young women, who can they turn to and where can they turn? say they're afraid to approach their parents with this. >> we try to encourage teens to identify a trusted adult in their life, it may be a parent arngs olding sibling, wellive teacher, guidance counselor, a coach. the conference aims not only to educate the teens, but also yes have a whole segment for youth service providers because they're in roles and relationships with teenagers where they may have an opportunity to have these conversations with a teen. we're trying to encourage it from both sides, how the teens look more broadly on who they can share with and have adults surrounding them open up this type of conversation to give kids in trouble an opportunity to talk about it. >> cheryl i would imagine it's one of the most difficult things to share with someone whether it be a family member or advisor or guidance counselor. you have been out there truly

sharing your story to help so many people all around our region. what do you tell them? how do you counsel them if they're going through something right now? >> i tell them that they're not alone, that there is someone there who could help them that's trusted. but other message i try to give is that we all are in this together and we all need to watch for the signs because it is so important. that's what saved my life, my daughter's life because she decided to talk to somebody. if we keep an eye out for different behavior, different ways that people might be isolating themselves covering bruises by wearing loth sleeves in the summer. there's so many different signs they can look for and act on it. there are very very specific things that people can do to act on it to make sure that the individual does not feel about

herself or his self, but they know there's someone there to liss sglen julian you put together this amazing psa. you're a junior, we mention thad before, in high school. students your age, are they more aware? is this something people talk about? do they look for signs? they see it in movies, perhaps in media? >> i think it's something unfortunately that we don't talk about and don't notice as much. that's why at i choose respect, we're trying to bring it more into the cultural light. i know within the school system, ms. feinstein and i we're trying to bring it -- and the other members of choose respect we're trying to bring it more into the more prevalence throughout schools, throughout the county and other places where adolescents might be. >> it's interesting. it's a great catch phrase choose respect. that's what we're talking about here, respecting a fellow human

being. some people don't get it or perhaps they're not wired that way. when we look at do ples tick violence and we often har that people have witnessed it in familiar leets and they carry on the wrong behavior, as they grow up, do you think that that's a large part of what's happening when we talk about young guys carrying this out in school? >> i think there's a number of different sources this can derive from. i think that would be a mistake to say that's the only way, if you were victimized or witnessed at a child that you will become a perpetrator. as we were talking about before there's a lot of sensationalization in movies, in -- on the internet, videos, youtube. i think that also there's modeling certain behaviors and what people think is cool and what people don't think is cool, i think that's a big problem too. and sometimes, unfortunately it's just sort of the viewpoint

the place where the abuse ir is coming from and they see an opportunity and they can exert their ability to control someone else and there's power in that. you sort of feel more powerful as a result. i don't think it can be linked to any one thing although certainly there are many studies that talk about kids that are in the pros sense of domestic violence with adults an absolute fact, are more likely to be abusers themselves. it would be a mistake to limit it just to that. >> when we come back, i want to talk about self-esteem too, on the other side of the break. if you want to learn more the choose respect conference is coming up on march 8th.

our focus this morning choose respect. julian, tell us a little bit

about how you got involved and how other young men your age can get involved as a bystander if they witness something or see something. >> i didn't get back into too much into this issue until last year actually. i worked at the montgomery county circuit court, and i was exposed to a lot of case wheres there was domestic violence within family cases. seeing how prevalent it was, i had never heard about this before it just really opened my eyes to how big an issue it was. i looked for ways i could help out within the county and it ended upbringing me to choose respect. because i wanted to make an impact, i applied pour the position to be the student member, and here i am now. even if i wasn't give then great opportunity, there's still many ways you can just by listening to friends, looking at researching how to help other people reading the news because it is so prevalent today in our news whether it be college students, adults. just being informed.

just being informed is a great way to know what the signals are, how you can help and i think most of all, try to always be there for someone who may be in that position. >> well put. he mentioned the courts. debby feinstein, i ask you, what options are there out there for someone and when that should they take the avenue of calling police and law enforcement and the legal route? >> obviously an acute ordaining rouse situation, call 911. that's a very clear path. if they're not sure what to do or not ready to reveal everything, there's so many opportunities for counseling and support. the same website you go to for the conference is part of a broader website through the family justice center, a one-stop shop for people of domestic violence. it over the last few years has expanded resources for teenagers and their families who are

direct victims witnesses to domestic violence. we've been working with non-profit organizations including one of our great supporters through the conference, the aware program. they actually offer counseling to teens on site at the family justice center. they can help them make these decisions. it's not so easy. it's easy for us to say go to the court get a protective order call the police, tell your parents. those are all incredibly difficult decisions. as the teen caught in what's going on, it's hard to break out. >> cheryl, you have certainly walked the walk and are helping so many people. what is your message to young women out there, particularly when we're talking about high school? >> this abuse is all about power and control, and it is in your power and it is is in your control to make it stop. my wish for every young person who is experiencing this is to take back your power and end it. >> and your daughter is doing

well now. >> my daughter is doing well. >> she talked about it opened up and got the help. >> she got the help she needed through our support our family support through therapy and through finally knowing that she had the ability in her to make the changes that was needed to stop the abuse. >> and anyone can go to this conference on march 8th right? this is a free conference? >> free conference. come on down. >> thank you. this is such an important -- critically important conversation. thank you for sharing your stories with us and congratulations for all the great work you're doing and continue to do. thanks so much for coming in. we thank you for having us in. now back to "news 4 today." enjoy the rest of your weekend, everybody.

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right now on "news 4 today," the latest round of snow and rain moving out of the area but what it left behind might cripple your commute this morning. >> chuck bell totaling how much you got. he said the travel could get worse at the end of the day. what a mess out there. good morning, and welcome to "news 4 today" on this sunday. i'm adam tuss. >> i'm angie goff. boy, out in reston virginia we got a ton of snow. >> i probably got about six or seven in falls church. >> we got close to nine. this morning it's all about the cleanup, driving into work. a lot of slick spots out there, chuck. >> there are a lot of slick areas out there on area roads this morning. this is going to continue as we go into the