[laughing] so everyone at fox loves the show so far. i--i guess i just have one question. uh-huh. where's our money? excuse me? you heard her. it's been two weeks. where's the money? you trying to screw us, chump? give us the money, or we're breaking all this fox [bleep].. [worker screams] oh! money! my god! oh, my goodness. peg bundy's wig. no, no, no! no, no, no! bye! ead my shorts, bart simpson's shorts! oh! raah! [growls] ya! oh, no. that chair is from "bones"! [cackling] [screaming] no! no! no! hang on!

for your first two weeks of work. oh, that makes sense. alison: oh. sorry. just to clarify, every two weeks. yeah, great. yeah, great, totally. we got it. sure. mm-hmm. yeah. oh, door open or closed? uh, closed. oh, yeah. cool. least it went better than the "empire" meeting. [music playing] [audience cheering] whoo! yeah! yeah! whoo! whoo! yeah! yeah! yeah! yeah! yeah! yeah! yeah! welcome to "party over here!" we've got an amazing show for you tonight. but bebere we begin,

with the show oath. all rise.

all: amen. all right, great oathing, everyone. please enjoy the show. it will be your last. ho! you gonna die.

enough pressure in here for ya? i'm gonna take mucinex sinus-max. too late, we're abt to take off. these dissolve fast. they're new liquid gels. and you're coming with me... you realize i have gold status? mucinex sinus-max liquid gels. dissolves fast to unleash max strength medicine. let's end this. mom, who is that? hello! who? these dresses are fantastic. they're old navy. thanks. old navy?!

oh i have to go, to old navy right now. in just a few moments, i'll be sitting with one of the most controversial bachelorettes in the history of the "bachelor" franchise. you're watching "bachelorette: after the final rose," starting right now. [audience cheering] welcome, nicole. wow. what a crazy season. [chuckles] you are the first bachelorette in the history of "the bachelor" to have sex with every single one of the contestants. i i d! whoo! i boned that guy. i boned that guy. i boned that guy three times. i ruined that guy's... on the volleyball court.

this all happened before the first rose ceremony, so that was a lot. but you didn't stop there. you also slept with every member of our crew. mm-hmm. yep. i even had sex with you, chris. you did, indeed. in fact, i orgasmed better than i ever have in my entire life. oh, my god. thank you. now, bryce p., you were the first to be eliminated. how did it feel to hear your name just moments after having sex with nicole in the jacuzzi? it didn't feel great, chris. i had just given her all i got, but apparently that wasn't good enough. i mean, come on. this is the designated show dummy. every ti he appeared on-screen, it had that trombone "dumbo" music. it was not gonna happen! [trombone music plays] but then there was a twist. mm. one of the eliminated contestants came back to ask for a second chance.

after that first night when nicole screwed me and, uh, two other guys on the front lawn, i knew that i needed to see more of her. i never met a woman like her before, so free and fun. i knew i was falling in love. audience: awww... get over it. also, your penis is gray. you need to see a doctor. mm-hmm. now let's talk about the final rose. two men poured their heart out to you, got down on one knee, and proposed. and in response, you literally kicked their asses. i mean, they needed sense beat into them. ok at this guy. he's trying to eat a candle. but, nicole, the whole purpose of the show is for you to find a husband. say what? i'm already married. you're-- you're already married? mm-hmm. oh, yeah. he's right there. ooh, hi, baby.

in a relationship. it's s srd. ooh, you know what? let's say we give this one more go-around. take your pants off. let me chomp [bleep]. let's have a real [bleep]-a-thon. you know i'm into that. that brings us to the e of another season of the "bachelorette." now stay tuned for some shonda rhimes... [audience cheering] woman: hey, gu, want a woman who's gonna listen to your every word? then call the mansplaining hotline. man: actuallyyin "star wars: episode vii," rey is a textbook mary sue. there's no way she'd be able to use a lightsaber like that. tell me more. i don't know anything. our uninformed girls are waiting for you to explain simple concepts in a super-condescending way. man: actually your vote means nothing.

there's no word i like more than "actually." [sighs] announcer: sports... man: statistically football coaches should actually almost always go for that fourth down. whoa, slow down, s`ud. girls don't know about sports. shh. announcer: men's rights... man: feminism is a hate group. it's the modern nazi party. and try our white knight feature. [second line beeps] second man: how 'bout you leave her alone, you misogynist? sorry about him.please don't think all guys are like that. i know they're not. you're one of the good ones. [man grunts] actually... actually... actually... [man grunts] actually, we're waiting for your call. tell us what we're doing wrong on the mansplaining hotline. man: by the way, "mansplaining" isn't actually even proper portmanteau. you can't just combine "man" and "explain." 's not even clever. all: you're so right. [laughing]

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coming soon to fox... she's a no-nonsense prosecutor who always gets the job done. cancel my morning. i got a big transvaginal mesh case. she's lena lockhart, with a practe specializing exclusively in faulty transvaginal mesh. my client is an expert at implanting transvaginal mesh. my client's transvaginal mesh was a sad vaginal mess, and you're gonna pay. announcer: and when the lights go down... how did this mesothelioma case end up on my desk? i onon do transvaginal mesh cases. you can't just do transvaginal mesh cases.p i don't just do transvaginal mesh cases. [muttering] vaginal mesh. transvaginal mes ohh. ohh. transvaginal mesh. [echoing] ...mesh, mesh.

i implanted a perfectly adequate transvaginal mesh. you're lying about my client's transvaginal mesh, aren't you?! yes! [jury gasping] i used a subpar transvaginal mesh. i have order i ithis transvaginal mesh trial. your honor, i mesh my case. she's lena lockhart, attorney at law... if you ladies evev have a problem with your transvaginal mesh, give me a call. ...on fox. hey, nicole, can i borrow your phone for a second? oh, yeah, sure. thanks. ohh! jessica, what the hell? shh. trust me. hey, i'm so sorry, but can we send michael in here to clean this up? oh, my god. is that the hot p.a.? you know what? uh-huh. oh. [cheering] uhh!

ah, thank you, michael. you're welcome, nicole. everything else okay? whoo! uhh! oh, you have something on your shirt. whoo! whoo! eeeeeh! i think i'm all done here. whoo! whoo! whoo! whoo! guh? [music playing] whoo! whoo!

[woping continues] see ya around, ladies. uhhhhhh! oh, my god, alison. were you doing a character, or was that you? [laughter] that was all me. oh. this is "party over here." [p.a.] attention, passengers, flight 867 to albany has been delayed by two hours. damn. flight's been delayed again. we're glnna miss this wedding. oh, hold on. i know what to do.

what's flyte? it's like uber, but with planes. cool. is that safe? ooh. looks like jamari is gonna be here in two minutes. come on. letet hustle. all right. [jamaican accent] hello. how are you? just put your stuff down. you're jamari? you tammy? yep. okay. away we go! [radio] hang on, one sec. jamari, you're not clear for takeoff. jamari, what-- damn it, jamari. so where we headed? albany. i don't see it. ah, you wanna just tell me how to get there? uh... north. which way is north? oh, no, no. i got it. okay. water? no. uh, no. no. no, thank you. you want to charge your phone? no. no. no. you want some mints? no! you know what? we're okay. thank you. is, uh, the air good? do you want me to roll down a window?

if anybody asks, yes. ah, speaking of which, i hate to ask this before the ride's over, but you two seem irie. do you mind giving me a five-star rating? i had two tiny crashes this morning, and boss man be on my case to get my rating up. okay, um, if you land us safely, we will give you five stars, promise. that chris... [radio chatter] so, you seen the new "captain america"? no. oh, that chris evans. oh, that's a rude boy i can get behind. me daughter likes thor, but i say just give me captain america-- [ringtone] that's my phone. what? what? [plane diving] it's in the cabinet. use your eyes. vhow's she even getting a phone call in here? we are flying so low. oh, my god! there is the wedding. hey, jamari, this is our stop.

all right. this is only the third time i've landed this plane. oh, my god. get ady. [passengers yelling] oh, my god! [yelling] oh, god! oh, remember, five stars. absolutely. five stars. got it. i love you. [both laugh] i don't know. i'm gonna have to give her four stars. that was the most terrifying experience of my life. yeah, but it was only 11 bucks.

what's a pack of smokes cost? your smooth skin. see ya again. smsking causes wrinkles that age you prematurely. what are cigarettes costing you? enough pressure in here for ya? i'm gonna take mucinex sinus-max. totolate, we're about to take off. these dissolve fast. they're new liquid gs. and you're coming with me... you realize i have gold status? mucinex sinus-max liquid gels. dissolves fast to unleash max strength medicine.

[audienccheering] thank you for hanging out with us at "party over here." oh, i seriously love you guys so much. i'm 'a bone you. i'm 'a bone you. eh, not you, but-- guys. guys. oh. we forgot to do the gravy baby sketch. what are we gonna do with all this gravy? eh, waste it. i don't care. no, nicole, we can't waste it. how are we gonna eat this big ol' pot of gravy? a contest. ooh! if there's a way to win, ha ha, i'm in.

okay. ooh. hey, josh, can we get some cups? yeah. announcece it's the crazy gravy challenge. [air horn sounds] [audience groaning] [laughing] [lauauing] one! [bells ringing] i got a bone. [coughs] going back for number two. yeah, give me another. there's steam coming offf it. [bell rings] oh, it's so warm. [bells ring]

guys, i feel terrible. ye. why'd you say five? yeah. i don't know. it's the first number that came to my mind. we can't stop a contest without a winner, right? how would we stop? well, by-- by forfeiting. okay, well, i forfeit. i forfeit all the way. ah, you dumb jerks! i'm the gravy winner! [bell ring ooh. oh, yeah. ooh. ooh. [grunting] ooh! oh! what do i win?! our cars. our cars. ooh, yes, that's right. now i got my porsche, a honda, and a honda. what else? the gravy. the gravy. oh, yeah! that's right! let the bodies hit the floor, 'cause when i go home, i'm pushg your cars off a cliff! [laughs] good night. this has been "party over hehe!"

[fanfare plays] yeah! all: we fell off a horse! yeah (helicopter blades whirring) in your 20s, one minute you can be in a comfortable groove with your friends... and then someone new comes into the mix. (helicopter blades whirring) oh, i think that helicopter's chasing us.

(grunting) my n ne is cooper barrett, and i'm here to tell you that when a buddy finds love, things can come crashing down. oh! (yellsls my name is cooper barrett. my friends and i are here to mess up our lives so you don't have to. woman: and you'll be all right, now. i know it's worked! (dramatic music plays) (woman screaming) neal: oh, my god, that's so easy. i'd marry the girl from the ring, kill the girl from the exorcist, and sleep with the twins from the shining. trick question. they're all underage. damn it. well, that's how they got jared fogle. where's barry? he's missing horror movie nigig. (door creaking open) barry? aah! aah! just ashley, y'all-- my little sweetie pie.

god. come on, barry, you're missing the movie. oh, he doesn't watch horror movies anymore. that's right, because it desensitizes us to vionce and objectifies axe murderers. women. women. by the way, guys, i can't make our league tomorrow. me and ashley are renovating a par hold up, you're bailing on the basketball game to do something we can get convicts to do for free? look, afterward we can come back here and have a little... (whistles) oh, i'd love to, but i have, um, a thing at the library. baby, you know (whistles) means sex, right? don't worry, i'll make it up to you. mm. mm! mm. ugh. oh. come on. and i thought watching my parents (w(wstles) was disgusting. totally. wait, what? ashley's the worst. she's got barry wearing all these nice clothes and eating vegan food, volunteering for charity. what's next, a fulfilling sex life and years of romantic happiness? i think you guys don't't like ashley because