jay andy . -- >> andy . levey? >> are you done? >> no. levey. >> the commercial did not take 65 takes. it took 45. >> but they are trying to make the story brrrr the kiss. that is a lie. >> and there was a version with more tong. >> i will -- yes. >> that will not be shown during the super bowl. they claim cbs rejected it because there was too much tongue. they are going to show it on the website. >> it would be more funny if they said more tongue and it is him reading the little red book. >> that was a stretch. >> thank you for that. >> andy, that was a clever joke. >> someone was talking in my ear. >> i said they would be reading from the little red book. >> waitress fired after the tip fiasco. you said she got a bad tip. actually she showed the receipt with the note on it and she posted it and got fired. >> the only other thing i had was a joke. >> go for it. >> it is about the pastor though. >> why? >> i was going to say first of all pastor bell is more like pastor time. >> i like it. good writing. >> it is really good. it is barney m

>> andy boy's my father, andy d'arrigo, he's the face on the label and a lot of people ask, is there an andy boy and i say, yes, there is. >> who is this? >> yep. it's me. >> oh. ha ha. you see, when folks around here say andy d'arrigo is the face of andy boy produce, they mean it, literally. now 86 years young, he, along with his daughter margaret and son john, run one of the most successful farms in the salinas valley. it all started back in the early 1900s, when andy's dad and uncle emigrated from sicily and went through ellis island. they were both teenagers and spoke barely any english, but they had a dream for something better. >> this is the american dream where people see opportunity. i don't know how my grandfather was living there, could scrape up enough money to put 2 kids on a boat to the united states and probably inowing they'd never see them again. but they knew there was no opportunity there where they lived. and i think that's what the united states is all about. >> the 2 brothers started their operation in new york, but then moved out west to beain growing fruits an

still to come, the half time report with andy levy. never had a birthday party, andy, right?t's half time report is brought to you by pigs. the animals with short legs, brisly hair and a broad snout. thanks, pigs. >>> don't do that. we are back. let's find out if we got anything wrong. let's go to andy levy. first i have some news about our show. >> what would that be? >> we are replacing bill with a swiver. >> good news. no, tomorrow night we are going to air a repeat, but on saturday at 11:00 we are having a brand-new show. 11:00 east coast time. east coast time with a lot of good guests. we have an oscar preview. i think we are having a buffet. i am getting an on air colonoscopy which will be given to me by a clown. >> will they have the camera go in your colon? >> exactly, my colon. i want to tell the viewers to tune in on saturday at 11:00 for a new show. we get a lot of viewers, it becomes permanent. >> you keep telling people you are getting a colonoscopy from a clown and we will get a lot of viewers. we are our own worst enemy. >> we can't even promote our show. we ar

back to you, andy. >> thanks, tom. thanks also to r

>> no one is perfect, andy. no one. >> i said the whole -- the whole is better than some of the parts. >> that makes no sense. >> you don't make any sense. i am valentine's day, not andy. >> have a comment on the show? e-mail as you the red eye at fox news.com and do you have a video of your animal doing something? go to fox news.com/red eye and click on submit a video and we might use it. still to come, the half time report from tom shillou. >> tonight is sponsored by hula-hoops. they are twirled around the body for amusement. thanks, hula hoops. dismie we're back. lets -- >>> we're back. let's see if we have gotten anything wrong so far. we go now to tom shillou. we did those jokes yesterday. >> boo. >> we do those jokes 105 times. >> was i referencing a new story? >> i never know what you are doing, tom. >> as is my right, i was slaking my thirst. >> i heard you have a new cd out. >> i do. look at that, all right. >> sexy. >> the first time i have seen it all up close like that. >> i gotta tell you, you don't

the half time report from tv's andy levy.lease be there, andy. >> who wants to spend money on flower. chocolate stays for seconds and then she will ask -- whrap every bear is guaranteed for life. they do it right every time. so here is what you do. go to >>> we are back. let's find out if we got anything wrong so far. now we go baying to andyly -- we go back to andy levy. how are you dismog. >> good. why am i reading prompter? that was confusing. i almost read that. hagen phelps -- megan phelps, you said she became uncomfortable with signs that read "fags can't repent." i think that is nice of her that now she believes they can repent. >> but she don't see anything wrong with calling them fags? let's not look past the obvious. >> i don't know if it is that part or what. >> they cannot be fags is what she is saying. >> guys, she is only 27. >> she is a child. >> i would like to think that much like our president her position is evolving. >> all right. >> matt, you mentioned that she says her -- it started when she was tweeting

>> thanks, andy. coming up, a group of california high school students is fond of wearing patriotic bandannas and chapting usa. is that racist? it will be when our panel gets uh hold of it. and mayor bloomburg wants to ban styrofoam, ensuring my nightly delivery will be colder when it arrives at my doorstep. mayor bloomburg, get your hands off. and teens have been sleep texting and not remembering what they write. i don't remember what i do when i am asleep. and by asleep i mean awake. and by don't remember i mean won't admit to. andy? >> thanks, tom. see you at the half. >>> let's welcome our guests. i am here with author, columnist and fox news contributor jedediah bila. i think she has been on the last 12 shows in a row. look gavin mcguinness. he is a writer for talking mag.com and street carnage.com. and bill schulz. he thinks he is on "the face" right now. and john gibson host of "the john gibson show" on fox news raid yore weekdays at noon -- radio weekdays at noon eastern. >> a block. the lede.

>> thanks, andy. coming up on tonight's show, it is a bird, it is a plane, it is a community organizer with super powers. no, not that community organizer. can dc comics bring down wall street in the way the occupy movement couldn't? maybe. and young people are america's most stressed out generation. do they have any reason to be? obviously not. hopefully our panel will demean them coming up. and cats kill. billions of cute, furry, feathery creatures are killed by unfeeling housecats. a bill schulz segment so shacking andy -- so shocking andy levy refused to tease it, but i am teasing it and teasing it good. >> we will edit that out entirely. thanks for the effort. let's welcome our guests. i am here with author, columnist and contributor jedediah bila. it is tv personality and best selling author greg gutfeld. what is he doing here? his latest book is called "joy of hate." bill schulz, i am so, so sorry, america. and next to me, tucker carlson, fox news contributor and chief of "the daily caller" and

they call me crazy, but who is laughing now, andy? >> nobody here. is it. >> it is not funny. >> why do you think -- is it president obama? >> i'll tell what you it is. when bruce willis has to crawl in it to implode it from the inside, little pieces hit the earth. that's what happens. where was morgan free map? >> you you confusing movie world. nasa says this event is not related to the asteroid which flew by earth on friday. but isn't that exactly what they would say if the two things were related? >> exactly they don't want people to freak out. that's why they have been trying to send out images to the universe about our religious system. they don't want us to freak out that we are not alone. who knows? right before the show i read somebody who is smart about these things say actually we can't rule that out because we don't have enough geo sin croon niecessed if this was a shorn off piece or not. >> whose fault is that? >> barack obama's. >> the video that we saw which is incredible, everyone has a dash cam in russia. it is awesome. >> well, someo

let's go to andy levy. >> how are you doing? >> doing fantastic. >> every time you ask that my heart sores a little more. >> that's why i do it. i have decided, you know what, it doesn't take much effort to lie and say i care. >> that's all i ask. that's all i have ever asked. >> first of all, greg, pretty sure bin laden was responsible for 9/11 and not 9-1-1. >> are you sure? >> i am fairly certain. i seem to remember the song 9-1-1 is a joke by public enemy which talked about that thing being a joke. >> that we talked about. >> any other words you want to randomly throw out there? >> cats and trees. >> okay. >> you can't understand why the shooter doesn't get disability. the issue here is waiting for the v.a. to process his claim. he will, i would think, eventually get this ability. >> that's a good poit. uh -- according to the center for investigative reporting the average wait time for a v.a. claim is 273 days. that's unacceptable. >> that's way long. >> and in a lot of cities depending on where you file your claim, it is ov

the half time report from tv's andy levy. andy levy. he is 68. they're coming. yeah. british.ater. sorry. ok...four words...black monkey? a baboon? hot stew saturday!? ronny: hey jimmy, how happy are folks who save hundreds of dollars switching to geico? jimmy: happier than paul revere with a cell phone. ronny: why not? anncr: get happy. get geico. fifteen minutes could save you fifteen percent or more. let's get back to andy levy for whatever. >> wow, really? >> what did i do now? >> just like that? >> it is like that. >> all right. >> who ever you are. >> good to know. texas high school class. joe, you brought up that the school district says they were given the choice for the burka and then you said as if there were burkas just lying around. they were provided by the school, but it does president mean they were forced to wear them. >> i imagine they were forced in the same way that when a teacher says you have homework to do you are not forced to do it if you want to say i will fail this class. >> i don't think that's true, actually. >> you don't? >> i think they were given

andy williams is now 27, he has spent 12 years behind bars. take us back to that moment, and if you can tell us what was going on in your mind at the time that would really help us. >> um, to me it was just like a numbness at the time. you know what i mean, and like i couldn't really-- like at 15, i didn't really think like all that stuff through. i didn't think two boys were going to die. i didn't think 13 people were going to get shot. i just thought i was going to make a lot of noise and that the... and that the cops were going to show up. >> reporter: andy had moved from maryland with his dad after his parents had divorced. he was the new kid at school, and even the boys that accepted him bullied him unmercifully. so, he was really going through hell? >> he's getting tormented out as the new kid at this big school and being tormented byhe older kids there. >> we're getting buzzed. >> and >> reporter: andy started drinking, smoking pot and taking prescription painkillers and he had access to a gun. he had boasted to his friends that he was

this is teddy from andy pandy? i used to watch andy pandy. so how did you come to own ted? teddy? my mother was a puppeteer who worked for the bbc in the 1950s for the watch with mother series. she did andy pandy she did bill and ben the flowerpot men, woodentops. that was her life. it was also, of course my early life, because it started in 1950 when i was five. and there's always been this story that i was the model for andy pandy. you've brought some photographs here. let's have a look. so this-- that's the group. i mean, that's the famous characters. yeah, i would say andy pandy, bill and ben wheat, looby loo and of course teddy, and here he is. there was obviously more than one of each puppet. they had to for all sorts of purposes. so teddy had a couple of stunt doubles, did he? or maybe he's the stunt double. he's the stunt double. the point is all the others from that sequence are in museums. this is the only one that ever escaped, and it was given to my mother when the program ended by the producer. and this is your mother here. this is my mother here operating. now

go away, andy.ne hathaway's nipples do a point, counter point debate on last night's winners and losers. what is the mystery meat in ikea's swedish meatballs. you ride it and it is a horse. i said too much. >>> did they give a hoot about the pursuit? i speak of jaw let -- gillette. they have angered some consumers who say they encourage, quote, prejudice against i hairy men. they should shave their chest to make their girlfriends happy. men who don't shave are beheaded. the committee is looking into the gripes from these obviously sensitive hairy men. let's discuss. >> kennedy, when did the hairless men become so desirable? what happened to society. what happened to the vaw -- to the varility of a hairy man. >> it is suddenly offensive. i want a man to look like a giant terrier. i want fur brimming from every luscious curve. they are the people who worry they only like anorexics. i present kate upton and john stocil. >> i wonder why he would say john stocil. >> they are very lucky. >> jaime, you wou

. >> para terminar acá, andy, chicas las amo, son únicas, las quiere su amigo andy de ecuador. >> andyel peinado de valentina. >> todo está lindo, pero lo que se va a comentar en facebook es el arete. >> pero comencemos con música. >> sí, buenos días. ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ . >> al regresar: estaremos tuitenado con los artistas y además estaremos dándole la vuelta al mundo. >> bueno, ya estamos de regreso en "tú desayuno alegre" y llegó el momento de tuitear, pero hay que alimentarse pues tuitear con hambre es horrible. >> sí, mira, cuando hice mi primera película en carolina del norte y luego en la florida y hay fresas, se parecen a esa, miren qué tamaño de fresota. >> sí, estas fresas eran separadas, pero se amaron tanto que murieron para siempre. >> sí, mientras que él se come su fresita, vamos a ♪ tuit, tuit, tuiteando ♪. >> ahora viene la nueva, con michel telo. >> sí, es que no viene al programa. >> sí, la última vez lo hizo. >> ¿de dónde es carlos vives?. >> de barranquilla. ♪ ♪ >> bueno chicos, seguimos: ♪ tuit, tuit, tuiteando ♪. >> es que no hizo la parte de

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for that we go to andy levy.s representative i have to ask, why the [bleep] was pinch on the show? >> what? >> why was pinch on the show? >> because, well, we said once a week. >> why am i on here? i have nothing to do with any of this. you should be talking to pinch right now, andy. >> that's okay. >> if you want we can make him appear. >> that's okay. greg, i thought we talked about maybe fridays and not thursdays. >> i thought it was fridays too. >> i am not here on fridays, but not that it matters. >> you are not here tomorrow? >> what? i have nothing to do with pinch. >> who is in tomorrow? >> let's talk about this after the show. >> arab-american groups said the ad is racist. there are many racist ads being run during the super bowl. >> there is a volkswagen again commercial. >> not racist. >> you covered it on the show and i read for that commercial. i was close. >> were you going to be the jamaican guy? >> land of the thousand lakes, my friend. >> she a great commercial actor. >> that accent was so racist

let's go to andy levy for a pre game report. andy, what is coming up on tonight's show. >> thanks, greg. our top story tonight, the white house posted a photo allegedly showing president obama supposedly firing what appeared to be a shotgun. our allstar panel will take a closer look. and something about some football games. and finally does going into prison turn you into a criminal? the shocking answer you might have figured out when i did this tease last week. >> i have nothing else to say to you. >> then go away. >> i shall. >> let's welcome our guests. >> what can i say? i like to role play, people. the political commentator and her latest is called mugged. and if jokes were headlights he would have us all itching to get lid of him. it is joe derosa. glum and em loomy. glum and gloomy. and in canada he is considered a vacuum. and he knows bonds like i know wands. it is the wall street strategy ceo. >> a block. the lead. that's the first story. >> will a pigeon that is clay believe the nra? they have at some point touched an

sounds like andy levy's apartment. here is what the second grader told fox 31, a robot fox, in denver. >> i pretended something was in my hand. i pretended there was a box and something shaking in it and it went -- >> he did not throw anything real or make any threats against anyone. he explains he was pretending to be the hero. >> so nothing can get out and destroy the world. >> but there is no reprieve from make believe. mary blair elementary school says the actions violate one of the absolutes which says no weapons, real or play. how is the kid handling it? >> i just can't believe i got disbended. >> oh, disbended indeed. you know who else likes to put on his imagination helmet and pretend to save the world? >> he will make a glue maker extremely happy. wk, it is always a pleasure to see you, my friend. has the world gone insane? we are now waging war on make believe. >> in my school days we could play with fake weapons. although some kids did bring real weapons which is frightening. now to not be allowed to play wi

>> thanks, andy. coming up on tonight's show, it is a bird, it is a plane, it is a community organizer with super powers. no, not that community organizer. can dc comics bring down wall street in the way the occupy movement couldn't? maybe. and young people are america's most stressed out generation. do they have any reason to be? obviously not. hopefully our panel will demean them coming up. and cats kill. billions of cute, furry, feathery creatures are killed by unfeeling housecats. a bill schulz segment so shacking andy -- so shocking andy levy refused to tease it, but i am teasing it and teasing it good. >> we will edit that out entirely. thanks for the effort. let's welcome our guests. i am here with author, columnist and contributor jedediah bila. it is tv personality and best selling author greg gutfeld. what is he doing here? his latest book is called "joy of hate." bill schulz, i am so, so sorry, america. and next to me, tucker carlson, fox news contributor and chief of "the daily caller" and

sounds like andy levy underwear. for more let's go to the correspondent who is watching developments. >> it is time to pass a federal budget. to apply more pressure to the president and the democrats, republican leaders say if a budget is not passed, they will try to prevent members of congress from being paid. if it is a good idea let us know what you think. >> patrick, i would rather be wrong than be a hipocrite. i was for the drones under bush and i am for the drones for obama. what bothers me are people who switch. what is your problem with drones? >> first of all i am going to be ticked if james cameron was wrong about sky net. >> that's next. >> this is the most dangerous pages produced in a longtime. it exposes huh poke craw see and sank tau mown -- sank sank tau mown knee on both sides. it is a timid response from them. >> you know the other thing about that retiring to the word chilling. >> you have the layoff that is silent and you have the ride that is completely silent because they don't want to appear so

. >> andy was always real playful. >> there you go! >> he was a real kind kid. >> hi, daddy... >> reporter: how did the sweet kid in the home movies become the murder suspect on the 6:00 news? >> as you said, mostly students and parents meeting up with one another, and i'm sure so shocked they just want to see which other friends are out there. >> reporter: what made andy williams-- then 15-- walk into a boys room at santana high school in santee california and open fire on his schoolmates killing two and injuring 13. his father jeff is haunted by the question. so, he wasn't a kid that was infatuated with violence? >> no, not at all. you have the silly clown, that's the thing. you don't expect the silly clown to do something like this, to go kill people. >> reporter: the class clown. >> the class clown would be the class killer. >> reporter: the mind of a rampage killer can live behind the face of the boy next door. can science shed any light in these darkest of dark places? there is not much data to go on. from columbine through newto

let's go to andy levy. hi, andy. >> hi, greg. >> how are you? >> great, thanks. making you work for it. department of peace building. dana, you said we need a secretary of adorable people and you not so subtlely volunteered yourself. you can't do that. that's like giving yourself a nickname. you can't do it. >> you can do it. dick cheney did it. he was named to the search committee to get a vice president, and he went through all of the motions and he said it was the best thing he ever did was appoint himself to the search committee and then made himself vice president. don't you see? >> i see what you are saying. you can't do it. and don't compare yourself to dick cheney. >> this is a guy who was ambudsing my blog to the huffington post and now what is he? you were ambudsing my blog to the huffington post and then you were an ambudsman. >> that's what happens actually in dc. you start floating your name. anna wintore. remember there were sayings she was going to be ambassador? you have to throw out some chum to see if anybody will eat it up jie. she did not beco

let's go to andy levy for a pre game report. andy, what is coming up on tonight's show? >> in the wake of pot being legalized in colorado, will tourists flock to the state to get high? some say no way. others say way. plus researchers say watching certain types of tv shows can affect the behavior of really young kids. in response, certain types of tv show say to researchers, no, you can affect the behavior of really young kids. that's real mature. and are scientists on the verge of creating a pill that will inconstantly make you sober? probably not, but we will talk about it as if they are. >> thank you. that third tease sounded familiar. >> it is the same one i used last night. wednesday, greg? >> i will hit you wednesday and say you suck. >> our first guess is so hot she sleeps in an oven mitt. she anchors the fox report weekend. she can waive, good for you. saturdays and sundays on fox newschannel. sounds familiar to me because i work there and if hilarity was a soccer match i would watch english men do him for 30 minutes. it is the co-host of the opie and anthony sho

jim, welcome to the show. >> thank you, andy. it is good to be here. >> have we gone from being the land of the tree to the land of the free stuff? >> i just think people are too polite to ask. nobody wants to say are you going to be on welfare? then you will be called racist. that's why nobody has asked. if you want to find out ask what their favorite tv shows are. if they mention a soap opera or "the price is right" that means they are at home and not working. >> the nonpartisan center says households were using one major welfare program in 2010 and that is compared to 23% of other householding. if that is accurate, is that true? >> we are a nation of immigrants , but we need more high skilled immigrants to come to the country. newt gingrich had the point. he had a good point and if he earned a phd we should earn a green card. to have their places taken up by those who would go on the dull, that is problematic. >> a nation of immigrants, i have trademarked that phrase. don't use it again. senator sessions says it is much talked

let's go to andy levy for a pre game report. andy, what is coming up on tonight's show? >> in the wake of pot being legalized in colorado, will tourists flock to the state to get high? some say no way. others say way. plus researchers say watching certain types of tv shows can affect the behavior of really young kids. in response, certain types of tv show say to researchers, no, you can affect the behavior of really young kids. that's real mature. and are scientists on the verge of creating a pill that will inconstantly make you sober? probably not, but we will talk about it as if they are. >> thank you. that third tease sounded familiar. >> it is the same one i used last night. wednesday, greg? >> i will hit you wednesday and say you suck. >> our first guess is so hot she sleeps in an oven mitt. she anchors the fox report weekend. she can waive, good for you. saturdays and sundays on fox newschannel. sounds familiar to me because i work there and if hilarity was a soccer match i would watch english men do him for 30 minutes. it is the co-host of the opie and anthony sho