let's go to andy levy for a pre game report. andy, what's coming up on tonight's show? >> coming up, what is phony phone repairment james o'keefe up to now? the shocking story that will make you miss "the love boat." and a chicago woman takes the law into her own hands and shoots a 12-year-old boy who threw bricks into her home. some say she is a hero, but others say she is a heroin. and what song is most likely to make men cry? our allstar panel debates. but any answer other than the black eyedd peas "i got a feeling" will not do. >> you told the story about the old lady. >> away you moldy rogue, you a way. -- away. i apologize for nothing. >> why should you? >>> let's welcome our guest. i am here with anne coulter. she is a political commentator, who knew that? she is so smart that cheese wiz is now known as cheese coulter. and john devore. if common sense was coffee beans, i would grind him every morning. and bill shultz, his stench sets off car alarms. and the great actress, if acting skills were lake trout i would bone him on my kitchen opt coulder. and he fid fidd

let's go to andy levy for a pre game report. hey, andy, what's coming up on tonight's show? >> coming up on the big show, tuesday was a big night for a little state as christine o'donnell combat mike castle to become the republican nominee for senate. our allstar panel will explain why, or make jokes. plus, a man who burned a quran was fired from his job. the shocking story that is protected by the first heament. and katy perry went back to high school and hear what she had to say to an old classmate. >> thank you, andy. >> so full a voice from so empty a heart. >> my heart is empty, and my pants are full. >> i apologize for nothing. >> why should you? >>> let's welcome our guest. so sick of that. i am here with celebrity bloger, jill done son. -- jill dobson. what a clever name. and joe devito, he is back with that interesting patch of hair. if hilarity was a scrap yard, i would toss my junk at him. and fun fact, he was named "people" funniest man alive. and she is a columnist and commentator. she knows conservative thoughts like i love high strung tots. and each of his sec

let's go to tv's andy levy for a pre game report. so, andy, what's coming up on this here show? >> coming up on this here show, they tell bob woodward we can survive an attack. and why the japanese will never have paris. and we will discuss john gibson and bill shultz. >> thank you, andy. >> get you gone you beet, you acorn. >> why rebuke you him that loves you so? >> i apologize for nothing. >> go away. >> is he gone? yes. >>> look he is here, imogen lloyd webber, owner of three names. she is the author of "the single girl survival guide." you cannot scream her name in a crowded theater. steven crouder. he knows comic timing like i know house boys wining. and my repulsive sidekick, bill shultz. he is considered a mule. and she is back, amy schumer. she is a comeed comedian and co-host of a different spin on fuze, the net work. you often find pelicans drenched in her. and our new york times correspondent, good to see you, pinch. >> it is a first for paris. just having fun, greg. i will leave the comedy to the comedians. you rogues. >> and now to the greg-alogue, it is a muffin o

let's go to andy levy for a pre game report. hi, andy. what's coming up on tonight's show? >> coming up, a policeman stages a fake arrest of a 15-year-old boy having sex with his daughter. that's the policeman's daughter and not the 15-year-old boy's daughter. and are detainees at guantanamo bay being held to one ice cream a day? something that makes you appreciate your freedom. and a study showing women apologize for than men. >> thank you, andy. >> i spurn thee. >> i will make quagmeyer out of your brain. >> i apologize for nothing. >> i know that. >>> i am here with author and columnist se-cupp. her latest book is called "losing our religion." she is so hot the miami heat changed their name to the miami cupp's. and he is so tough his introduction will be free of the usual sexual innuendo. i don't want him to rip my face-off. and it is my repulsive sidekick bill shultz. he stinks of old produce and shame. and next to me, jim norton. if hilarity was a bumper car, i would ram him and giggle. and he is tossed on your stoop like a flaming bag of poop. good to see you, pinch.

let's go to andy levy for a pre game report. hi, andy. what's coming up on tonight's show? >> the democratic party has a new logo and it is really snazzy. if by snazzy you mean totally lame. and a massachusetts school district is forced to apologize after several students participate in a prayer service during a field trip to a mosque. the shocking story that will shock you if you are even still capable of being shocked anymore. quite frankly i don't think you are. and finally a village for cats? why does it look like i am asking questions? that's how we do it in the tv business. greg? >> thank you, andy. >> the owl shriek at thy birth. a bad sign. >> that's because the owl was my father. go away. >>> she can kill with you her looks or shotgun. i am here with sc-cupp. she is so hot that coffee sues her for being spilled on her lap. wow. my head hurts. criminal df attorney re in -- criminal defense attorney remy spencer. she is so wonderful that her bra is called the remy bra. and my repulsive schultz kick, bill side. i am changing your name. and sitting next to me, he scare

for that we go to andy levy.es -- clonies came to play. >> yes, es -- especially the midstryker. >> he had his game hoop on. >> yeah, he did. and a sprained tail too. >> incredible. >> the pledge to america. greg, you said part of the pledge was a vow to deport justin bieber to another country, preferably hawaii. >> yes. >> not in the pledge. >> wishful pledging, if you will. >> and you mentioned nancy pelosi's spokesman ditched the pledge. and one of the things you said was if the pledge were to succeed, it would be used in the private hover hovercraft. i thought you were i can making it up, but it is on page 33. >> it is one of the few honest things they have done in a longtime. orphans are overrated and coasters are under rated. >> some republicans are not high on the pledge either. eric erickson calls it, quote, perhaps the most ridiculous thing to come out since george mccleland. >> i don't even know who george is. >> a civil war general that abe lincoln had to boot. >> that's a longtime. >> it has been a lo

let's go to andy levy for a pre game report. what's coming up on tonight's show? >> president obama gives an extensive interview to "rolling stone." for those under 50 it is a magazine. for those over 30, a magazine -- for those over 50 it is a magazine. and for those under 30, a magazine is -- never mind. and finally, how sleezy is allen gracen? he is so sleezy. greg? >> thank you, andy. >> i should be angry if the time were convenient. i apologize for nothing. >> i hope your face falls off and is eaten by an adorable fawn. >> thank you. >> all right. >>> you know what we should do? let's welcome our guests. i am here with leeann, the host of nbc's "poker after dark," the card game. and the national heads up poker championship. she's so hot i tried selling her at a pawnshop. and my repulsive sidekick, bill shultz. he stinks of drain hair and sorrow.

for that we go to andy levy. so what do you have besides overwelming sense of joy over tuesday's premiere of "parent hood"? >> there is no room for anything else except the pint of dublin mudslide i bought to eat while i'm watching it. >> are you going to keep your feet warm? >> no, i am not going to keep my feet warm of the -- warm. >> that was silly. >> i learned it was a ben and jerry's flavor and an urban dictionary entry. the more you know. in this case, the less you know the better. >> bring a tarp. >> yeah. ben and jerry's may want to rethink that whole thing. new nonprofit position organization claims mickey d's causes heart disease. you said it is a, quote, so-called physician's group. it actually is a nonprofit organization that conducts clinical research and higher standards for ethics and effectiveness in research. >> can i respond to that? >> sure. >> in 2002 i can't remember if it was the american freedom couple sill -- i made that up. 2002 they did a study and found at most 20% of the staff in that

we go to andy levy. >> andy, did you catch the game last night? he dropped the flap on the candle. >> i have it dvred? i haven't watched it yet. do not tell me who hurls the fastest garment. do not. i do not want to know! >> it ain't over until it spluges. > great, thanks. unbelievable. president obama calls the suggestion that 9/11 was an inside job. -- inside job unbable. -- unbelievable. >> you don't get the anchorman reference? >> no, i'm sorry. no, i don't. >> wow. >> you know what, you are snf. >> mike, you mentioned all the traffic that comes with the u.n general assembly being in session and the fact we have to pay for police for overtime. have you also noticed the hookers jack their prices up? >> that's a trick question. no. >> actually, it was a trick question. >> i do like that. >> you are johnny on the spot. >> i really am. >> you might say baker pays women for sex. >> and probably produces hideous children with those hookers. >> also, mike, i agree. it is disappointing he didn't bring the crazy when he rolled into town. he is so much

for that we go to tv's andy levy. what do you have besides sexy discounts on sexy shoes and flattering dresses? >> i get quite the discount on unmentionables. >> thank you for mentioning it. >> well, now that i mention them, i may be screwed. >> that's too bad. >> greg, you said you would like to be banned from a country like canada. i think there is already a de facto ban for you going to canada. >> i should look up the word de facto. >> yes, it could be good for your health. and tamara, you said there were no charges against this kid. and the british police told him he was banned from america, but they don't have the authority to do that. >> no, but maybe they are in cahoots with obama. >> i don't know about the whole cahhots thing. >> isn't cahoots a bar? >> that's hooterses. >> they are in cahoots. >> i always wanted to open a bar called "moderation." i am drinking in "moderation." also the office, and you can call your home and say it is "the office." >> or call it "at a hooker's house." >> or call it, "i'm not a

for that we go to andy levy. what do you have besides a large section of submarines in your apart meant? >> i have a question for you. >> really? >> as you know i have bronchitis, and you kindly sent over a house boy stew. >> yes. >> did i detect a slight hint of poco? >> yes, yes. yeah you didn't find a toe ring, did you? >> no. >> then it was paco. >> dream act, nick you say it isn't going to happen meaning it won't pass, and you may be right. harry reid is attaching this to the defense authorization bill. in other words the defense budget. if he is successful in attaching it, if you want to vote to fund the troops and give the pentagon the budget you have to vote for this too. >> good point. >> that's what i meant to say. >> that means it probably is not going to pass. >> it is possible. what you are saying to people is if they want to vote against this, they have to vote against the defense budget and guess what. they don't care about the troops. >> you know what will pass? >> paco's tow running. -- toe ring.

we go now to andy levy. it is a shame about anne clara. >> it was her time. >> i suppose it was. >> polls show 80% of americans think we are weaker than we used to be. you said 80% think they have seen the weakest days in the world. ambassador, i was disappointed you didn't bring that up. not off to a good start. >> not a fan of rainbow. i like deep purple though. >> the color or the band? >> the color. >> ambassador, you said reducing commitments is a sign we are weaker, but is it necessarily -- for instance, if we were to pull our troops out of europe and say, foot your own defense bill for once, would that make us weaker? >> it would make them weaker, that's for sure. >> but i'm okay with that. >> anna, you said obama's change hasn't come as quickly as people hoped for, or maybe it came too quickly. >> maybe. we are getting philosophical. >> bill, you said if you want to know what the world thinks of americans, why did you poll americans? that's not the point. the point is to find out what americans think

still to come, the half time report from tv's andy levy.ss if you ask me. >>> welcome back. let's find out if we've gotten anything wrong so far. for that we go to andy levy. sorry to hear about the leg. >> thanks, appreciate. it. >> no problem. >> kristine o'donnell is a witch. greg, you think the witch craft thing will help, and angela, you said the tea party folks may not go for it. but she is a christian. isn't christianity all about redemption? >> it is all about redemption, but certain folks can os trough size you, so she needs to get off the witch stuff and talk policy. >> i wished she didn't turn gingrich into a newt. and i also want to see why they didn't deal with liz -- lesbianism. >> you called o'donnell a secret wiccan. real witches don't have anything to do with say dan. in fact, they don't have anything to do with satan. >> did i mention satan? >> you called her a secret wiccan. >> she said, satan. >> angela, here are the things i do care about. >> do tell. >> i think she needs to answer questions about improper use of campai