[ann smolin] i find that groups are very useful for having people talk about what's bothering them, for feeling that they're not alone, not different, that they're not isolated in their kinds of feelings. one of the things they learn most is no matter how bad something feels, it's going to feel better, that other people have been there and other people have been able to go on, that they don't get stuck, that things do change. when people don't get back on track, when they show signs that stress is undermining their ability to function, and if this period lasts less than six months, psychologists say they have an adjustment disorder, but how do we know when someone's reaction is normal and when it's an adjustment disorder? is the suicide survivor's grief normal or abnormal? does the widow of the policeman grve too long? what about that man getting divorced or that woman losing her job after 12 years? you feel yourself, when things aren't getting better for you, when you become dysfunctional, when your life becomes unmanageable, when things aren't going the way you want, when you've given